“This painting is so bad it actually made me laugh while I was making it! That’ll be $25.”

We are now a little over halfway to funding the next Regretsy Alchemy Fund project!

As you may know, the Alchemy Fund here at Regretsy works in $200 increments. When we raise that amount, we hire an Etsy seller to make handmade good for charity. Right now we’re closing in on our goal to benefit Project Linus; a great organization that provides handmade blankets to seriously ill and traumatized children.

We raise money for things like this by selling shitty merchandise on Zazzle, and today is no exception. Our own Bronc Drywall has designed 2 lovely new mousepads and T-shirts for your shopping pleasure.

Try Not to Sin and Be Bad T-Shirt
Try Not to Sin and Be Bad Mousepad
Are You Going to Eat That Pickle? T-Shirt
Are You Going to Eat That Pickle? Mousepad

Now, I know that everyone is focusing on Haiti, and I’ve gotten a lot of email this week asking me to get involved with that. But I just really think that every network in the world pretty much has it covered, not to mention every web site, celebrity and magazine. People with much louder voices are speaking for the victims there, and doing a world of good.

And you know, we’re only about $91 away from giving a job to an Etsy seller, and getting some handmade blankets for kids who really need the comfort. So I’m just going to stay on course with that, because those kids matter to me too, and they don’t have a charity concert planned anytime soon.

The floor of the Red Lobster bathroom, shortly before discontinuing the Ultimate Fondue.

FACEBOOK IS BACK UP AGAIN

The subscriber count is off for a day or two, but Facebook says no links or subscribers have been lost.

Oh, and guess what?

I FOUND HIS OTHER EAR

Oh she’s going to love it! She can drink melted butter from it every morning.

CONVO ME FOR THE RACHAEL RAY ASHTRAY, Y’ALL