Who wants hot dogs?

Dad, remember how you used to take me fishing? How you taught me how to drive, and to throw a spiral? And remember how when it would rain, you’d put all my newspapers in the station wagon and take me on my paper route? Well, here’s a clay penis. I figured it was either this or a tie.

- 5 more things that look like penises here

JESUS CHRIST WHATEVER HAPPENED TO JUST PUTTING A GOD DAMNED RIBBON ON YOUR CAR