Professor Flintbottom surprised everyone in the Diogenes Club when he joined the cast of Starlight Express at the Las Vegas Hilton.

Professor Pennywhistle reached into his fantastic adjustable hip satchel, producing a few farthings and a folded map of Main Street.

“Now then,” he began, “who wants a churro?”

IT’S UNIQUE

VERY UNIQUE

PERFECT FOR PEOPLE WHO LIKE UNIQUENESS

SO UNIQUE IT’S VINTAGE AND BRAND NEW AT THE SAME TIME

HANG IT SIDEWAYS FOR MORE UNIQUENESS

GET TWO AND MAKE EARRINGS

PUT AN OWL ON IT

WATCH PARTS

WATCH PARTS

A VACUUM TUBE AND WATCH PARTS

AN ELEPHANT HEAD AND WATCH PARTS

A VAGINA AND WATCH PARTS

A MUSTACHE AND WATCH PARTS

BUY HAND-ASSEMBLED!

Also great if you’re tired of things that are attractive and interesting.