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From Kata:

Might make you think twice about letting a dentist put their hands in your mouth.

And on a related note, this. – HK

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From Emily:
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I turned my sister on to Regretsy. She fell in love with the fish in a squirrel suit, and was disappointed she couldn’t afford it. However, a friend of hers made her the next best thing. Here she is with an “imitation” fish in a squirrel suit. It was made from a stuffed animal, a scanned photo of the fish head, and hand painted with blood spots. Fan art at its best. Enjoy.

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From Deb:
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Thank you for the awesome cat toys you gave away at the Urban Craft Center. I’ve attached a photo of my sweet baby Patsy, chowing down on your face.
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Personalized cat toys courtesy of Oh Boy Cat Toy. – HK

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From Jessica:
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I couldn’t resist making an attempt at the Steve Jobs as Jesus Alchemy Request. I was debating having the angels with iPods, but my husband said “Jesus should be the only one with an iPod, and he will bestow them upon them as he sees fit.” I thought this was an excellent point.
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From Molly:

I put a bid in on this Alchemy Request, but I never heard back from him after I sent this sketch.

Click thumbnail for full-size image – HK

From Barry:

I loved the gumball jar so much, I had to make my own! The green one is baby pickle surprise.

thank u for my fav website

Barry is having an art show in Hollywood this weekend. If you’d like to see his candy jars in the flesh, click here for details.

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From Sarah:
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I saw Vasectomy Vern in your book and fell in love. My best friend was getting his vasectomy the same week that I saw it, and I asked the seller to rush it in time for his “No Baby Shower” (the lady who makes them was very sweet and obliged me).

My friend thought it was hilarious.

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From Alicia:

After being inspired by the nail polish-enameled pasta platypus necklace, my good friend and I decided to make pasta necklaces for each other for our college graduation, and wear them with our caps and gowns. Here is her gift to me. It is a lovely little number composed of Spiderman shaped pastas, spray paint, assorted jingle bells, Christmas pins and some rhinestones for a touch of class. Thanks for providing inspiration for such a beautiful work.

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A TRIO OF MITTENS-INSPIRED SUBMISSIONS
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From Colin:
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From Helena:
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From Veronica:
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Oh, all right. One more.

From Lorinda:

From Lauren:

I couldn’t resist buying the recently regretsyed Captain Picard doll.

I bought it mainly because it reminded me of the doll made by one of the children on the Enterprise in the episode “The Pegasus” where there is a “Captain Picard Day” held.

Doll is posing with the paused scenes in the episode.

Jesus H. Macy, we’ve got a lot of email over here!

Just piles and piles of semi-coherent ramblings, all wadded together and posted in an approximation of actual content. It doesn’t get better than this!

So let’s stop wasting time and just get right into the high quality entertainment. Now, before the Nyquil kicks in.

First up, this spectacular bit of fuckery sent in by a sharp-eyed reader. Nice findings, Otto! Now try finding a dictionary.

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4 EMAILS ABOUT SKANTS:
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From: Lindsay
Subject: Skants!
Date: March 21, 2010 9:00:40 PM PDT
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When I found your posts on Skants, the first thing I thought of was this photo:



This is me, in the summer of ‘97, 14 years old and bored out of my skull. My friend and I decided that the solution to our boredom was to wear our T-shirts as weird body suits. I had no idea, at the time, how ahead of the fashion curve we were. Maybe I should start an Etsy store!
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From: Amy
Subject: Skants
Date: March 19, 2010 5:50:59 AM PDT

Saw this in a gallery in Barcelona and thought of Regretsy. The artist is Erwin Wurm.

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From: Vanessa
Subject: First recorded use of skants: serial killer Peter Sutcliffe, 1981
Date: March 4, 2010 4:35:16 PM PST

I was doing research for a class and stumbled upon this gem:

The origin of skants is both older and more evil than I would have expected.

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And to wrap up the Skantsmail, a picture I forgot to post: The 3rd place winner, posing with her toilet paper prize.

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From: Jen
Subject: My dog’s asshole
Date: March 20, 2010 7:03:41 PM PDT

I ordered the t-shirt from Zazzle. But I want a copy of your book sooooooooooo badly, that I couldn’t wait for it to arrive. So I took this pic of myself and my dog’s asshole and ’shopped the shirt. I don’t know if I’ll be able to get another pic w/the dog, because she feels violated and is sulking under her blanket in the kitchen.

Needless to say, Jen just won a free copy of the Regretsy book. – HK

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And finally, some of you may remember this Regretsy post, which inspired a reader to coin the phrase, “hitting the Etsy pipe”.

Well, take a look at this:

From: Kym Bixler
Subject: The I Love Regretsy Pipe

Here it is! The I Love Regretsy Pipe!

To really make it Next Level Regretsy, I felt like it should have a little something extra… sooooo… um, it’s kind of a cock n’ balls. How could it NOT be?

I was thinking we could auction it off and donate the proceeds to one of the awesome charities you work with.

-Kym

Can you believe the world I live in? I am surrounded by people with unbelievable talent and very poor judgment; the best combination ever.

Obviously, I would love to auction this off to fund our next project. I thought about putting it on Ebay, but I’m certain some jackhole would have sudden onset cryabeetus and close the auction down. Or even worse, I’d have to make it for adults, and then you’d have to do a retinal scan to bid on it. So let’s not do that.

Let’s just do it like this: If you want this, and why wouldn’t you, make me an offer. The person who bids the highest, wins. Every penny of your bid will go to charity.

Bidding will close at midnight tomorrow night.

I’m sure you all remember the Thanksgiving Skants dude, who many of you felt should have been the winner of the skants contest.

You may also remember that we started selling a Thanksgiving Skants dude T-shirt and sweatshirt in our Zazzle store a few weeks ago. The sweatshirt had the image printed upside down, to insure he would be properly oriented if you chose to wear the sweatshirt as skants.

As you know, 100% of the money we make selling this sort of thing benefits charity, and the Thanksgiving Skants dude has been a big seller. To thank him for allowing us to use his image in our Zazzle store, we sent him a sweatshirt, and some Thanksgiving Skants dude note cards.

Well, I think you can imagine my excitement today when I tell you that I got a photo from the Thanksgiving Skants dude last night, wearing his own image on his own Thanksgiving Skants dude sweatshirt.

That in and of itself would have been the apex of post-modern meta meme recursive clusterfuckery. But God love him, he took it one step further.

So may I present to you, the Thanksgiving Skants dude in a Thanksgiving Skants dude sweatshirt.

Upside down.

As Skants.