Regretsy » Dolls http://www.regretsy.com Where DIY Meets WTF Thu, 02 Sep 2010 16:30:48 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.1 en hourly 1 Placenta of Gravity http://www.regretsy.com/2010/08/16/placenta-of-gravity/ http://www.regretsy.com/2010/08/16/placenta-of-gravity/#comments Tue, 17 Aug 2010 01:55:15 +0000 Helen Killer http://www.regretsy.com/?p=20292

When you’re at the craft store, squeezing yarn balls and wondering which one will make more “fleshy” knitted placentas, it’s time to start asking yourself the hard questions.

]]> http://www.regretsy.com/2010/08/16/placenta-of-gravity/feed/ 80 This Shit is Bananas http://www.regretsy.com/2010/08/10/this-shit-is-bananas/ http://www.regretsy.com/2010/08/10/this-shit-is-bananas/#comments Tue, 10 Aug 2010 20:30:19 +0000 Helen Killer http://www.regretsy.com/?p=19903

]]> http://www.regretsy.com/2010/08/10/this-shit-is-bananas/feed/ 99 OMFG http://www.regretsy.com/2010/07/30/omfg/ http://www.regretsy.com/2010/07/30/omfg/#comments Fri, 30 Jul 2010 21:30:43 +0000 Helen Killer http://www.regretsy.com/?p=19616 I’ve seen my share of “reborn” dolls in the last year, but this is the first reborn vampire baby I’ve run across. And I’m only sorry I wasn’t in my car at the time.

Meet Jasper Dean, “the remarkable offspring of Jasper and Alice”.

Click image to view eBay auction

From the description:

GORGEOUS TWILIGHT BABY

HIS FANGS ARE SECURED INTO HIS MOUTH BUT CARE SHOULD BE TAKEN WHEN USING HIS MODIFIED PACIFIER AND BOTTLE OF FAKE ANIMAL BLOOD.

IF YOU CHOOSE TO CHANGE HIS NAME LET ME KNOW AT TIME OF ADOPTION AND IT CAN BE PUT ON HIS ADOPTION PAPERS.

The auction ended about an hour ago, with a winning bid of $90 plus $25 in shipping.

Someone paid $115 for this fucking thing, and they are going to talk to it and sing to it and cuddle it and pretend to feed it animal blood from a baby bottle every day. That’s what’s out there people, and that’s why I don’t leave my house unless I have to.

Happy Friday!

]]> http://www.regretsy.com/2010/07/30/omfg/feed/ 86 IN THE YEAR 2025 http://www.regretsy.com/2010/07/08/in-the-year-2025/ http://www.regretsy.com/2010/07/08/in-the-year-2025/#comments Thu, 08 Jul 2010 23:30:33 +0000 Helen Killer http://www.regretsy.com/?p=18691

]]> http://www.regretsy.com/2010/07/08/in-the-year-2025/feed/ 67 Formula for Success http://www.regretsy.com/2010/06/28/formula-for-success/ http://www.regretsy.com/2010/06/28/formula-for-success/#comments Mon, 28 Jun 2010 23:30:11 +0000 Helen Killer http://www.regretsy.com/?p=18103

]]> http://www.regretsy.com/2010/06/28/formula-for-success/feed/ 83 Premature Abomination http://www.regretsy.com/2010/06/02/premature-abomination/ http://www.regretsy.com/2010/06/02/premature-abomination/#comments Wed, 02 Jun 2010 23:30:33 +0000 Helen Killer http://www.regretsy.com/?p=16257

]]> http://www.regretsy.com/2010/06/02/premature-abomination/feed/ 119 Make It Sew http://www.regretsy.com/2010/05/05/make-it-sew/ http://www.regretsy.com/2010/05/05/make-it-sew/#comments Wed, 05 May 2010 20:30:36 +0000 Bronc Drywall http://www.regretsy.com/?p=7558

Oh, this gives me an idea.

]]> http://www.regretsy.com/2010/05/05/make-it-sew/feed/ 53 Nails sold Separately http://www.regretsy.com/2010/03/08/nails-sold-separately/ http://www.regretsy.com/2010/03/08/nails-sold-separately/#comments Mon, 08 Mar 2010 17:30:09 +0000 Helen Killer http://www.regretsy.com/?p=11609

]]> http://www.regretsy.com/2010/03/08/nails-sold-separately/feed/ 112 Cat Fight http://www.regretsy.com/2010/03/05/cat-fight/ http://www.regretsy.com/2010/03/05/cat-fight/#comments Fri, 05 Mar 2010 17:30:00 +0000 Helen Killer http://www.regretsy.com/?p=11693

Oh sure, the Pink Panther is fun. But the lepord is one of natures most beutifile creatures.

]]> http://www.regretsy.com/2010/03/05/cat-fight/feed/ 69 Nice Work, Sherlock http://www.regretsy.com/2010/02/05/nice-work-sherlock/ http://www.regretsy.com/2010/02/05/nice-work-sherlock/#comments Fri, 05 Feb 2010 21:30:38 +0000 Helen Killer http://www.regretsy.com/?p=9879

That’s a good guess!

I wonder if there are any clues that can help us solve this mystery. Hmmm.

What about this?

I guess we’ll never know.

]]> http://www.regretsy.com/2010/02/05/nice-work-sherlock/feed/ 97 Beyonce What http://www.regretsy.com/2010/01/11/beyonce-what/ http://www.regretsy.com/2010/01/11/beyonce-what/#comments Mon, 11 Jan 2010 18:50:31 +0000 Helen Killer http://www.regretsy.com/?p=8331 - Submitted by Anna

If you liked it, then you shoulda put a face on it.

]]> http://www.regretsy.com/2010/01/11/beyonce-what/feed/ 89 Sunglasses Not Included http://www.regretsy.com/2009/11/13/sunglasses-not-included/ http://www.regretsy.com/2009/11/13/sunglasses-not-included/#comments Sat, 14 Nov 2009 00:38:34 +0000 Helen Killer http://www.regretsy.com/?p=4254

Am I the only one who thinks this looks like baby David Caruso?

]]> http://www.regretsy.com/2009/11/13/sunglasses-not-included/feed/ 187 Build-a-Whore Workshop http://www.regretsy.com/2009/10/21/build-a-whore-workshop/ http://www.regretsy.com/2009/10/21/build-a-whore-workshop/#comments Wed, 21 Oct 2009 16:01:53 +0000 Helen Killer http://www.regretsy.com/?p=1876

Am I the only one who thinks this looks like Star Jones?

]]> http://www.regretsy.com/2009/10/21/build-a-whore-workshop/feed/ 41 Tiny Bubbles http://www.regretsy.com/2009/10/13/tiny-bubbles/ http://www.regretsy.com/2009/10/13/tiny-bubbles/#comments Wed, 14 Oct 2009 01:08:54 +0000 Helen Killer http://www.regretsy.com/?p=1226

It’s a good thing Michael Jackson is dead, because this would have killed him.

]]> http://www.regretsy.com/2009/10/13/tiny-bubbles/feed/ 20 Cut the Cord http://www.regretsy.com/2009/10/05/cut-the-cord/ http://www.regretsy.com/2009/10/05/cut-the-cord/#comments Mon, 05 Oct 2009 15:37:12 +0000 Helen Killer http://www.regretsy.com/?p=499

I’m sorry, but this is terrifying. You want to give this to a child? I’m a grown woman and I want to lock myself in the laundry room. Seriously, when you’re following a pattern to crochet a placenta, you need a time out. Put this whole thing in the trash and go to Toys ‘R Us. Your kid is going to grow up to hate you anyway. Don’t rush it.

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