This is a CF4L post from June, 2011
As you know, I buy a lot of fuckery. Some of it is terrible, some of it is wonderful and some of it is wonderfully terrible. It doesn’t matter to me, I love it all the same.
People often ask me what my house looks like, and I tell them it’s none of their fucking business.
KIDDING
Here are a few pictures of my office.
The Flounce pillow was made by Rebecca of Creeplings on Etsy. Rebecca has made so many things for charity auctions, and been so generous. She made this pillow for me to use in an auction, and when I saw it I thought, fuck that noise, I’m keeping it.
The poster is from ROFLCON, and was done by Dan Lacey, Painter of Pancakes. I’m on the poster, with pancakes on my head. Just like every Sunday.
The little toys in the back are figures of some cartoon characters I’ve done voices for (Muriel Finster, Cruella De Vil, Baby Herman). And there are some bullshit awards from my many years of diddling myself in advertising.
Flanking my 3D clay portrait by Sharie’s Craftworld, we have two purchases from Regretsy favorites.
On the right, there’s a beautiful paper cut-out portait by Risa Rocksit. And on the left, a Goatse style sampler by Voodoo Maggie, commemorating this moment:
Also pictured are three mugs I use as pencil cups.
The white one was from my old radio show on KFI. The blue cup was available as a winter selection in the ABC online store some years ago. Amidst the snowflakes are the harridans from The View, back when Rosie O’Donnell was part of the 5-way Yenta-fest. I would save this mug in a fire.
The brown specimen is a Goatse cup, artfully stretched and manipulated by by the sick bastards at Patton Pottery.
It’s absolutely stunning, right down to the wedding ring detail. And it’s food safe, so it’s perfect for pudding or creamed corn.
Here are some other treasures on the credenza. Mostly family photos, though there is a stellar shot of me and Martha Plimpton with Judge Judy.
There is also a Clio for some other bullshit advertising thing I did before I came to my senses, and a box of playing cards featuring Fred MacMurray and his wife. A friend found them somewhere and knew I had to have them. They were holiday premium from the Gas Company in the 60′s.
The rock on the right is actually a ceramic piece by AntB. The “rock” opens up and has beautiful glaze inside. I don’t know what it is about it that feels so magical, but I pick it up and look at it every day.
On a bookcase on the other side of the room, I have a collection of cars by Classic Wrecks on Etsy.
These amazing model cars and hand made and detailed to look like rusted old junkers. The detail is incredible. The doors are off, there’s “rust” on the fenders and if you look carefully, you can see that the car in the middle has a tiny “hanger” as an antennae.
At this point you’re thinking I am a woman who has everything, except possibly savings.
And you’re almost right. There’s really only one thing I don’t have that I would give anything to possess.
This is a truck from Stew Leonard’s in Connecticut. It’s basically just a very large grocery store, but they have animatronic displays all over the place, so you see chickens singing in the dairy section and that sort of thing. It’s completely disturbing.
Bronc is from Connecticut, and we’ve gone back a few times for family events. And each time, I beg him to take me to Stew Leonard’s so I can see this truck.
I am not lying when I say that I would drive this thing everywhere. This would be the family car. I’ve never seen it in action, but I harbor a secret wish that the horn makes a mooing sound.
UPDATE: After I first posted this, Classic Wrecks sent me the greatest thing in the history of things.
So, now I have everything.
Oh wait.
Okay, NOW I have everything.
