Sometimes, when I’m “Dancing with the Stars”, I think about how you remind me of “Mr. Ed”, because baby, you are my “Top Chef”, and I thougt I’d let you know that I’m not sure what I’m talking about.

I am absolutely LOVING the MSNBC story today about Fail blogs, which includes this page about Regretsy.

Nothing is more important than spending time with your family. In fact WILL YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP I’M TRYING TO WATCH LOST

Also from this seller . . .

Perfect for your MacBook Pro.

I have so much love for my fellow man this morning. Don’t you? Don’t you just love the whole human race?

Me neither.

But let me tell you what I do have. I have some of the most God forsaken Esty shit bombs masquerading as Valentine’s gifts the world has ever seen. Just big piles of disappointments, all wrapped up in upcycled red ribbon.

All week long, I’ll be featuring Regretsy Valentine Gift Suggestions, sprinkled in with all the usual fuckery you’ve come to grow weary of.

Just look for the turd, and you’ll know you’re in the right place.

Thanks to your Zazzle purchases last night, we have funded our next charity project!

I’m looking for someone to make Knitted Knockers!

Knitted Knockers are soft, comfortable knit prosthetic breasts for mastectomy patients. When placed in a bra, they take the shape of a real breast, and are a great alternative for many women.

One silicone prosthetic breast costs between $300 and $500. Without health insurance, they are out of the reach of most breast cancer survivors. Even those with insurance are limited to a new prosthetic breast every two years.

While I’d love to get a good amount of these for the money we’ve raised, it’s important that you make some money for your efforts. These projects are only really satisfying for me if everyone gets value from them. And I’m looking for someone with a sense of humor, because I’d love to make some with tattoos and piercings!

Here’s our alchemy request on Etsy. If you knit and think you’d like to do this, please bid for the job using this link (please don’t send me an email about this, because I may not see it).

Thanks!