LOVE CHILDREN BUT I CAN’T FINISH A WHOLE ONE?
The heads would look nice next to my wax skull collection.
also, I kinda want to attend a nude baby shower.
I’ve tried it. You might want to rethink this.
Was Kale served as h’orderves along with upcycled shower gifts. Just asking…
Is the fondant flavored? If they’re not chocolate/caramel/vanilla, I am so not interested. As for the zombie baby head, I don’t even know where to start. “Be sure to keep your chocolate sculpture out of direct sun”?
This guy had a baby face too, and it didn’t turn out to well for him.
those heads make me want to scream “Quaid”
nom nom nom
“What’s that writhing mass of insects on your knick-knack shelf?”
“Just a baby head I really shouldn’t eat so I thought I’d display it.”
“Weeeeeeell, thanks for letting us in but we gotta go! This gospel won’t preach itself!”
As if I needed another reason to avoid the dreaded baby shower thing.
Or maybe…I should just buy some of these and give them as gifts at the next shower. That should cut down on the invites!
These would be the ultimate touch for my One-Eyed One-Horned Flying Purple People Eater costume, you all have no idea. I’m gonna win best costume at this year’s Annual Sister Mary Joseph’s Family-Friendly Halloween Hoedown for sure!
How would you wear them?
I don’t know. I was just going to put them in a sack and take them out and eat them in the most morbid way I could probably think of. But them? Geez, I’m not a monster, you know.
there’s supposed to be a “wear” in there. Stupid HTML tags.
If ever an event deserved to have “Hobo” at the beginning of its name, this is it.
The first time you stayed up past midnight, your first kiss, the day you got that big promotion, the first time you bit into a fondant baby-head…those are the precious memories you treasure forever.
Memorialize them today with this bare-assed fondant baby! Available in several non-life like colors!
Welp, looks like I’m going to have my nightmares haunted by disembodied edible zombie baby heads.
Turn about is fair play, to the zombies our heads are edible.
“Wanna eat like Vlad the Impaler, but just don’t have the guts to actually go through with it? Buy my Fondant Babies and no one will know you’re not PURE evil!”
I would totally buy one of those baby heads for a Halloween party display. It’d be awesome right in the center of the crudités.
It will certainly weed out your non hilarity loving “friends.” And really, you can’t put a price on that.
Shit, I would take one to the movie theater with me, or eat one on the bus, and I wouldn’t have to worry about anyone sitting next to me
If you’re going to make edible babies, at least make them look delicious.
Add glitter sprinkles? Whipped cream hairdos?
I’d say they look kind of delicious, but then I’d have to duct tape myself between two converging tectonic plates.
I found that comment uplifting, Mel. I like your range.
If I’m paying that kind of money for chocolate baby heads I want to be able to order them WITHOUT cataracts.
Buy a baby topper and cut out the cake middleman altogether.
Is it wrong of me to want to buy a few dozen of those babies, find anti-choice picketers, stand in front of them, and eat the candy babies?
Or fill an Etsy-crafted uterus-shaped pinata with them?
Abortion party!!!! I’ll bring the booze.
Float them atop a large bowl of strawberry preserves. Mmmmmmm!!!
That’s the best idea I’ve heard in a long time. I’ll bring the folding-chairs.
Can we have the candy babies on a stick? I hate getting my fingers sticky from candy babies.
I am thinking if I impaled a few Zombie baby heads on the spiked iron fence in front of my house it might just keep those pesky Jehovah’s Witness guys out of my yard.
Wait I can go to downtown New Haven and mess with Yalies. That school is loaded with wrought iron fences complete with spikes.
They were nuthin’ but dirty little traitors.
Wouldn’t it be fun to hide the cake topper ones in your hand and pretend to sneeze and/or cough them out while visiting a pre-school?
No, no I don’t want to know why I want to do that either. Let’s just move on.
Oh my jesus, that made me cackle!
The yellow fondant baby doesn’t look like an ethnic selection as much as galloping neonatal jaundice! And as a devotee of the ‘cake wrecks’ site I am inured to fugly edibles!
The uniform coal black isnt too realistic either.
My trash-guy is kind of a douche (yells, throws shit around), so I’d love to put about 5 or 6 the baby heads on the top of my trash with some rotted meat hidden underneath (for smell) to create the illusion that the heads are rotting. That would probably shut him up.
Does anybody really eat fondant? I thought it was just for decoration. Like less-tasty parsley for baked goods.
When I first saw the baby heads I thought, ‘oh my god that idiot made them look like dead, decaying baby heads.’ Then I scrolled down and read the description and…had no idea until now that there was a market for chocolate dead, decaying, zombie baby heads.
It would be the perfect finishing touch for that sheetcake you left out on the back porch two weeks ago. I’ll get the forks!!
The fondant babies look like they’re waiting for you to use a candy thermometer to check their temperature.
That does answer the question of where and how to put them on a stick…
This baby wonders what’chu what’chu what’chu lookin’ at…
I’m going to have the angry baby song stuck in my head for a week. Also the dead eyes opened . It makes for an odd mash-up.
When I was a kid and my peers dressed up as zombie babies, I always thought it was rather disturbing and odd. As I’ve aged, its just as disturbing. I’d love to put one of these in the freezer for a family member to find.
Oh, suh-weet! A little ketchup at the neck part. Maybe doing a 3/4 pose. Straight-on would look too fake. THAT would slow my stepson down from always checking the pantry and fridge when he comes over, before he ever says ‘hello’ to his dad and me. You’d think that ‘foraging’ would go away after they get to be, say, twenty-something. This might actually put a stop to it!
so, how did you distinguish that you were zombie babies, as opposed to just ordinary zombies?
Binkies and diapers! And it wasnt me, my mom made sure we dressed up as benign and ordinary things like roaches and cans of raid
What… I don’t… fondant… babies? Edible? What? Why?
I think the actual cakes made to look like babies are even worse.
That is a horrible thing you’ve posted there. Just as soon as I stop laughing I’m going to throw up.
Can I just say, I don’t have kids/don’t want kids/am not at all sentimental about babies, but that GIF still makes me cringe. GAH.
No, I say! A thousand times No! I’m not sure why. Do I have a soul after all? Crap.
I don’t know which is more disturbing to me, the look of giving the baby a lobotomy, or the fact that the rest of the body is missing.
Or maybe just that it’s not chocolate cake.
Christ on a cracker, I didn’t even notice the body was gone! I was too transfixed by the gelatinous wiggling of the cranium as the knife begins to saw through it.
That right there is a missed opportunity. It should have been Red Velvet cake.
$35 seems like a really reasonable price for the zombie baby head (although I have no basis for comparison so who knows?). It looks well-crafted and you’d get a lot of chocolate out of the deal (assuming the heads aren’t hollow).
Whoops, the title of the listing actually specifies that they’re solid. Derp.
So yeah…that’s gotta be like 2lbs of chocolate, minimum. Plus all the artistry and hand-painting that went into it. I frankly expected the price to be a lot higher.
That could probably be arranged if you insist.
So you’re saying you wouldn’t comparison-shop for a cheaper chocolate baby-head? I hear ya. It seems like a pretty fair deal to me, too. Plus, I don’t really want to drive ALL THE WAY down to Hartford to compare prices at the Chocolate Baby Depot- that’s like an hour and a half drive!
i think they match prices if another baby head dealer offers theirs for a lesser price. at least they should, it’s just good business.
But Choco Babe Depot has licorice strip umbilical cords and raspberry placentas – NOW HOW MUCH WOULD YOU PAY???
I think they are 35 pounds not dollars. More expensive.
35 GBP is about $55 USD. I might be willing to spend the money if I could scare a whole bunch of people with it before I ate it.
Did anyone else see that when you order your zombie baby head, you can also order chocolate testicles!
“as castrated” or who would want to eat them?
I’d like mine with nuts.
god, i’m sorry for that. i type faster than i think.
From the maker of chocolate baby heads, it’s chocolate testes!!
Have they been sitting in the bath too long?
It’s like the bumper balls you see on the bug macho trucks. Anyone ever think about the fact that they’re hairless… Wa kind of message is sent by placing shaven/waxen testicles on your dualy?
What* even. iPad typing, enough said.
I’m borrowing “bug macho” and the naked testicles reference for the next drive past the Monster Truck rally.
Oh wow, dehydrated testicles. It’s like beef jerky only not as tasty.
It’s jerk beefy! With cream sauce!
Are those fondant babies anatomically correct? What if I specify a boy baby and they send me a girl? It would upset me all day.
These need to be served with fava beans and a good Chianti.
I actually think the fondant babies are kinda cute. I’d eat one. A little pricy, though. If I could maybe get a bulk rate, I’d just put a bunch of these on stacked tiers next time I’m asked to bring a cake to a baby shower. Either people will love it, or they won’t ask me to bring cake anymore. Either way, I win.
If you can get a bulk rate, do them as cupcake toppers. That way, everyone can have their own cute little horror to devour.
mmm… sweet, delicious baby-cakes…
made from real baby!
Okay, I’ll admit the heads are terrifying. If I’m ever asked to give a baby shower, I think these would get me out of ever having to do another one.
But I have a strange desire to eat a fondant baby. Preferably in front of all the people I wish would leave me alone.
Starting with the baby’s head, right!? Like a chocolate bunny?
So are the nude baby fondants life-sized? If so, I know what I’m going to do the next time I visit my sister. Just wrap the little darlin’ in a baby blanekt and announce “Sis, guess what! You’re an Aunt again!
I could see eating baby fondue, but not baby fondon’t, and I’m conflicted about baby fondant. A rare moment of overlap betwixt First World and Cannibal Tribe problems.
Would You Like a Jelly Baby?
PS: Those zombie baby heads really creeped me out.
Oh. My. God. Tom Baker. I got weak at the knees seeing that sweet, curly haired devil. My, my didn’t I have the crush on him back in the day…
I just want to order 8 of the baby heads, put them in a duffel bag, and check it on a flight to Estonia. These are the things that keep me going on a Thursday afternoon.
All I’m saying:
(Study of Two Severed Heads by Theodore Gericault)
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