- Submitted by Peyton
I’m strongly considering buying this so I can deconstruct it and figure out how to make my own.
You’re quilling me!
how can they hawk such a cheep item? buncha chickens.
There is always someone gullible out there.
They’ll live to egret it.
Being able to craft at this level is a real feather in your cap.
Call that crafting should be considered a cardinal sin.
The seller is a birdbrain
It takes real talon-t.
Someone’s gonna get shafted.
That will fletch a pretty penny!
Wonder what kind of pigeon they’ll get to buy it?
This tickles me!
Feather you like it or not.
The quality on Etsy has really gone DOWN!
Some people will go to Heron back for their crafts, but these lazy buzzards killdeer me.
The most amazing cat toy ever.
Damn, I finally caught an episode of “Etsy or Regretsy”!
This rates right up there with The Log (Ren & Stimpy).
This seller has talent, but it’s not in the craft realm. It’s more of a talent for bullshitting people.
I guess we found out where all the sub-prime mortgage bundlers ended up.
Etsy is the shelter from the rain, Zippy.
The last refuge of a scoundrel! Wait, no, that’s patriotism. Damn you, Samuel (no L) Jackson!
That’s why I only listen to Samuel Adams. He never lies to me, and tastes delicious.
The founding fathers really knew what’s important in life.
And (sadly) that is what etsy has become.
Aw, thanks. Now I’ve got the ad for “International Log” as my daily earworm!
Now I have the song in my head…
“it’s log.. log…it’s big…it’s heavy…it’s wood..it’s log..log..it’s better than bad..it’s good.”
Where’s the rest?
here you all go happy now !
“What rolls down stairs alone or in pairs
Rolls over your neighbor’s dog?
What’s great for a snack and fits on your back?
It’s Log, Log, Log!
It’s Log, Log, it’s big, it’s heavy, it’s wood.
It’s Log, Log, it’s better than bad, it’s good!
Everyone wants a log! You’re gonna love it, Log!
Come on and get your log! Everyone needs a Log!”
And now, log for GIRLS!
$2.08!? This is easily worth $2.10.
$2.11 given good market conditions.
Finally a project to use up all that catgut I’ve got laying around.
That awkward moment when you’re playing with a cat toy and suddenly realize where Fluffy disappeared to.
You’re telling me. 42″ string cat toy means 42″ of string to cut out of his intestines later after he ingests it.
I think the cat could actually make that.
I think our cat is trying to make cat toys. He always sneaking up and stealing feathers. I caught him stashing them under the bed.
Every time you come upon an obliterated bird on your doorstep, you can just say “That’s my Fluffy, the entrepreneur!”
Just wait until Fluffy takes the business public, then off-shores the work to Siamese cats (in Thailand, not Siamese-American ones) then they dump $1.99 feather toys on our shores and local, union cats are idled.
Or has it already happened?
What if Fluffy found “Siamese-Siamese Cats”? You know, cats from Thailand that are also joined together in pairs? Do you realize how many cat toys they could churn out?
They just better be ASS cats and not SSS cats. Our economy depends on it.
Our Fluffles is a house pussy. Outdoor pussies can be real savages. A cat tried to steal one of Bree’s headdresses. She sat it down next to her car when a cat came up, grabbed it and tried to run off with it.
Nothing’s worse than a pussy running a-muck!
What’s worse is no picture! She couldn’t take a picture cause the furry beast almost got away with the headdress!
and I am unanimous in this!
Sticking feathers up your butt may not make you a chicken, but apparently it does make you an entrepreneur on Etsy.
Tyler Durden approves.
If I did have a tumor, I would name it Marla.
If it’s not a tumor I’ll name it Arnold Schwarzenegger.
I salute your balls, MermaidsBlueTurtle. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a large number of dog treats to begin advertising, once I harvest them from my cat’s litter box.
DON’T give her/him ideas! There’s enough drek in the shop already.
I’m sorry but my feather and string budget is only $2.00.
You might be able to buy them made in China.
I’d love to try and make one myself, but I don’t know any birds (where do they hang out? Do you just ask them for feathers?) and as far as I know, there isn’t a “string store” anywhere in my town.
I once asked a bird if I could pluck her but I think she heard it wrong and was quite the pecker about it.
I once plucked a bird
Or should I say
She once plucked me
She showed me her toy
Isn’t it neat?
Etsy is cheap
She dangled a feather
In front of a cat with a squint
It played with the feather, I thought
“Boy, could we make a mint!”
I sat on the rug
Biding my time
Tying my twine
We set up a shop
And then she said
“We’ll knock ‘em dead”
She said that the PayPal receipts
Would roll in with a thud
I sat up all night wondering
How we could make dumber crud
And when I awoke
I was alone
This bird had flown?
Which just goes to show
Etsy shop turds
Are for the birds.
The Norwegian Blue strikes again!
Mr. Lee Slinkybutt is about to strangle himself with that cord. Danger!
Needed for construction:
4 String-making factory
5 Bird egg of a biggish species
6 Bird food
Anyone should be able to take it from here but it’s important to understand that No’s 5&6 are not combined in any way with No’s 1-4 until the very end.
You lost me at “construction”. I don’t even have a hard hat.
You forgot #6, a $375 self turning egg incubator.
I was hoping to use the cat for that. Cats are good with eggs and hatchlings, right?
If you ask a random assortment of cats-on-the-street, the answer is 87% “Yes” The rest say ” meee?” which does not, technically count, as “yes”.
I’ve found that, in addition to “meeee?”, some say “owwwww”. But that may be because I was standing on their tails.
All these years of incomprehension, and finally, a translation. Thank you Matt!
RevW: “Cat toy! Cat toy!”
repeat repeat repeat repeat repeat
Damn it, #5.5. Need a new computer light ..
Plus, what are “knot-tying” classes gonna cost me? This is starting to seem like a money-pit.
Why did we even send you to Boy Scouts if you weren’t going to learn how to tie a knot or win us a huge settlement for something?
Yeah, but I’m helping old ladies cross the street at a 5th grade level. The Scoutmaster said I might qualify for the State Scouting Championships!
7 Carrots, celery, onion, parsley, thyme, 1 qt water are also useful at the very end
Two-oh-eight? Which part of th fantasticness is the .08 for? Having the string TIED? Using a genuine bird feather? Identifying all the parts? Whoa! Wait just a flippin’ minute! … how much extra are the INSTRUCTIONS, eh?
Feather: $ 0.08
Fun had if someone actually buys this: Priceless.
Have you ever had to tie together 42 inches of used tampon strings? Let me tell you, it’s not easy. Eight cents for labor.
Remember the old SNL “commercial” for “Rope on a Stick!”?
I am actually amazed I could not find a video of that posted online anywhere. If someone finds it, please post it!!
Anyway, this “product” makes my brain hurt.
I just wish they had a higher-end version of this available. I’d be more than happy to pay a premium for it to be tied to a stick.
$2.28. Long barnwood strip is $1.12 extra.
Otherwise known as “Shit Leftover After My Redneck Husband Shot a Bird the Other Day and I Tied It Together and Cooked It”
If life gives you game, make, um, another game!
It’s the feather that never forgets!
I’m surprised it’s so affordable.
If you opt for the “Premium Package”, your cat toy comes with a real bell attached to the string somehow. It actually makes a real ringing sound, I’m not kidding! I’m not sure if they use a special professional glue or an advanced crafting technique that I’ve never heard of to attach it, but it’s well worth the extra $45.00.
Raptor + crafter = crap.
These can be made quickly. Velocicrapter.
Preys on idiots.
I’m so tired of resellers! Like we can’t tell this was mass produced?
Did you guys read the rest of the description?
“I made one of these for my cat. He’s very possessive of his. Just the string and feather for sale here. The cat’s name is Mr. Lee Slinkybutt. We rescued him from a shelter last spring.”
If you’re trying to make me take pity on the shop owner by showing me an adorable kitty who actually loves the toy, it won’t work. I am made of stronger stuff than that.
You’ll have to distract me with a red dot that moves around mysteriously ….
My cat was very possessive of crumpled-up grocery receipts until that obsession gave way to bendy soda straws, which gave way to paper towel rolls. Yet I have never attempted to sell any of these items on Etsy. What have I been doing with my life?!
What have you been doing with your trash? Just putting it outside for anyone to profit from?
But did your cat love bendy soda straws ON A STRING???
Don’t forget twist ties and grocery sacks (both paper & plastic have found favor).
I don’t know where in the house my kitty finds all the twist ties she comes up with.
I cannot believe the zillions of dollars I’ve missed out on by not selling the plastic rings that come off of milk cartons. I’m sure my own cat wouldn’t mind my selling away his happiness in order to be rolling in Cat Toy(r) dough.
I have actually seen bags of milk rings on sale as cat toys. Wish to God I could remember which store.
42 inches? FUCK! I need one with a string of 43 inches. Guess I’ll have to keep looking.
Same problem here, only I need string of 40 inches. Well, that’s life I suppose.
Mr Lee Slinkybutt will sell you the entire bird for $43.07. Don’t offer him $4.00 again, or he’ll bat you.
I’m astonished no-one has made a topical joke about Colorado.
“Cat toy” – really? How about “Tribal” + $5.00, “earth magick” + $10.00, “ritually energized talisman” +$20.00. Total profit: $34.80. Did Etsy stop giving those writer workshops, or something?
At my house, it’s just the feather. I never thought about adding a string! My mind is blown HOW DO THEY DO IT?
Would love to add a picture of Tard the Grumpy Cat here saying “Disapproves” but I don’t know how
Is the feather from a free-range bird??
My cat is allergic to gluten, how can I be sure this is gluten free nylon?
4 out of 5 vets recommend string as a toy for cats – veeery good for bussines!
This is a feather tied to a 42 inch piece of string and I don’t need it. However if they offered a string tied to a 42 inch feather I might be interested.
Ok let’s say I get the 2 dollars…but why the 0.8???
Even road kill deserves to be upcycled
Let’s list the good points:
- it looks handmade
- it’s cheap
- cats might actually like it
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