I think the spell was implanted by the dirty hippie. It’s a fail free spell that will effect more then the breasts can can be repeated every year or so, though the effects can last longer, on average 3 years.
Only one available, though. And I have two. I see an issue when it only works on one side and they sting you for the second ‘procedure’… clever bastards.
“Scumbag Millionaire”: The uplifting story of one man’s journey from inherited riches to other peoples riches. Names have been changed to protect us from lawsuits.
As president of the Itty Bitty Titty Committee, I feel I should do job and invite this girl to speak to our group. We meet in the church basement, Thursday nights. Free coffee.
One, two, Kalamazoo
Three, four, Jersey Shore
Five six West Phoenix
Men will think of you with their dicks.
+28
Zippy
November 9, 2012 at 11:57 am
Whoops, I just got my cellphone plan changed to T-Mobile. Shit.
+26
Glasgow
November 9, 2012 at 4:39 pm
Now I got big dirty pillows
So I get chased by all the fellows.
+5
lovinglymadewithspite
November 9, 2012 at 6:45 pm
What ever happened to the good ole’ “I must, I must, I must increase my bust! The bigger the better, the tighter the sweater, so boys depend on us!” mantra?
+12
lettucego
November 9, 2012 at 9:00 pm
That’s so 20th century. The 16th century is where it’s at.
+8
Devil_Girl
November 9, 2012 at 10:07 am
I don’t know…I think this is legit. If they can give that dude Bazingas like that imagine what they do for women.
OK, we have to get one thing clear. “Bazongas” are boobs and “Bazinga” is the new word for “fooled ya” as popularized by Sheldon on ‘The Big Bang Theory’. If this distresses you I’m prepared to make you a hot beverage.
Would you, could you, shake those tits?
Would you, could you, give men fits?
Would you like some bigger boobs?
Do you have some inner tubes?
A bicycle pump
A nice ickle rump?
A jittery jello
A drooly-droll fellow?
Would you, could you, pump your rack?
Could you, should you, nump a Brack?
Do not taunt Happy Fun Bazinga Bazongas. Do not drink hot beverages near Bazinga Bazongas. Bazinga Bazongas are made from a glowing green material that fell from space, possibly radioactive.
Ooh! I’ll scrape a picture of some hot chick off of someone’s website. Make up some story about a big boob spell. They’ll just send me some money and I don’t have to do anything but send them an email saying I cast the spell.
Yeah, wonder if they can magick up some repairs to the siding of that house. Because if they could, I might be tempted to see if they can fix my basement …
“We’re having some work done.”
“Do you mean to the leaky roof, or cracked foundation, or damaged siding or peeling paint or raccoon holes or…”
“TO THE WIFE’S TITS, MAN!”
“Oh, of course. So I suppose that means your kids’ braces are going to wait, then?”
“I know you can climb me for giggles and shits
On top of my shoulders I’ve awesome firm round tits
You can see for miles and miles and miles and miles …”
His idea of shopping for “produce” is getting something from the little basket on the gas station counter that has 2 bananas, an apple and a brown thing in it.
This is a gyp. I offer penis enlargement services for free. Of course, you have to be my type, we have to do it in person, and you have to start flaccid ….
Proof that this seller is only in it for the money: it’s a perfect opportunity to call the vulnerable buyer from a fake phone number, and ‘cast the spell’ live while asking her to touch herself and describe the experience, while fap-fap-fapping away … but the seller is clearly not as creepy of mind as I would be.
I got a survey from Etsy today. I filled it out and in the box for comments, I mentioned the resellers. I should have mentioned the imaginary items up for sale, eh?
I think it’s that I lie on my back and think, “It sure is peaceful here with nobody around.” I have appalling judgment when it comes to picking men, so I’m on a self-imposed break. And yes, I’m quite well acquainted with men and their relationship with boobies.
Are we the same person? Because we have largely the same situation(s). My judgement has been so bad that recently my very intrest in a guy is enough to quench my interest in him.
Why does he have to send you an email letting you know that the spell has been performed? Shouldn’t you know by the increase in your boob-size? C’mon, it’s either magic, or it isn’t. {rolls eyes}
This is such bullshit. Everyone knows magick isn’t real. If you must increase that bust, you have to turn to the mystical wisdom of the Orient.
The first time I saw the Breast Stim the commercial was in Japanese. I can’t decide if the white dude with the computer a minute in is just an actor they hired to give the product a nice veneer of science, or if that is a real guy who is currently holding both the titles of King of Skeeves and Happiness In Employment World Champion.
Part of me screams fake fake fake but another part of me says if you are that gullible you deserve to waste 25 dollars on trying to make bigger boobs. Have at it.
better yet, print off two of these awesome *BIG BOOBS* and tape them to your shirt. Results guaranteed! I only charge $5.99 per boob. So much cheaper, AND people will see what you’re really trying to show them.:-)
Do you suppose he has a breast lift spell too? I know they say lifts don’t last as long as augmentation but I am a D cup already and I want something perky but more natural than hoodoo augmentation.
I’m tempted to buy this ‘spell’, then send the seller a picture of my generously proportioned boobies and complain that they went overboard and made them too big.
I’d send my ironically bearded face and a mammography image to claim that the spell stopped my menstrual flow, vilified me, and gave me a breast tumor.
November 9, 2012 at 10:03 am
Oh, no. I’m not falling for this one twice.
Fool me once, shame on……..me. Fool me twice, ……shame…on…..the point is, you shouldn’t fool people.
November 9, 2012 at 10:05 am
You can’t spell SHAME without SHAM either? Balls.
November 9, 2012 at 10:06 am
Sham-WOW.
November 9, 2012 at 10:34 am
** I know who cast the spell. I think it was a Dirty Hippy…
November 9, 2012 at 12:58 pm
I think the spell was implanted by the dirty hippie. It’s a fail free spell that will effect more then the breasts can can be repeated every year or so, though the effects can last longer, on average 3 years.
November 9, 2012 at 2:48 pm
Oh, snap! Once you know how the majick trick is done, it takes all of the fun out of it.
November 9, 2012 at 4:15 pm
well pregnancy is its own ball of fun
November 9, 2012 at 10:03 am
“Nothing will be ‘SHOPPED.” There, fixed that for you.
November 9, 2012 at 10:04 am
Can I call my breasts “hoodoos” from now on?
November 9, 2012 at 11:00 am
Only if you ask me “Hoodoo you love?”
November 9, 2012 at 1:38 pm
That gave me a Rusted Root.
November 9, 2012 at 2:49 pm
Hoodoo thunk?
November 9, 2012 at 10:04 am
He must be one of the sellers chased off ebay, since they can’t sell that shit there anymore.
November 9, 2012 at 4:06 pm
You can’t legally sell it on Etsy either but … look, boobies!
November 11, 2012 at 12:11 pm
Only one available, though. And I have two. I see an issue when it only works on one side and they sting you for the second ‘procedure’… clever bastards.
November 9, 2012 at 10:05 am
I clearly need to reconsider my profession.
November 9, 2012 at 10:14 am
I always said that if I was any kind of scumbag, I’d be a millionaire.
November 9, 2012 at 10:24 am
“Scumbag Millionaire”: The uplifting story of one man’s journey from inherited riches to other peoples riches. Names have been changed to protect us from lawsuits.
November 9, 2012 at 6:44 pm
As president of the Itty Bitty Titty Committee, I feel I should do job and invite this girl to speak to our group. We meet in the church basement, Thursday nights. Free coffee.
November 9, 2012 at 6:48 pm
UGH, my boob-lette thoughts are making it hard for me to type in full sentences.
*my job…. do my job.
November 9, 2012 at 10:06 am
Maybe the time is right for my idea to sell “confidence” on etsy (nothing will be shipped).
November 9, 2012 at 10:07 am
Remember, Matt…you can’t spell “confidence” without “con”. XD
November 9, 2012 at 10:09 am
Or “dense”.
November 9, 2012 at 10:10 am
I will send you an email letting you know that you are now really confident.
November 9, 2012 at 10:13 am
Remember not to open with “Dear Sniveling Failure Blob,”.
November 9, 2012 at 10:17 am
This is why I need you on my voodoo team, Zip. Smart thinking.
November 9, 2012 at 10:27 am
I’m one eviscerated chicken and magic deadfall stick ahead of ya, pal.
November 9, 2012 at 10:30 am
You should go and buy that REAL chicken feet belt from a few posts back.
It won’t help with the magic; i just someone to buy that thing.
November 9, 2012 at 10:32 am
I have a cauldron. Well, it’s just my washing machine that’s broken, but it works pretty well as a cauldron.
November 9, 2012 at 10:41 am
Double, double
Double D-cup
Fire burn and
Cop a feel-up
November 9, 2012 at 10:51 am
By the pricking of my thumb
Some Bazongas this way come.
November 9, 2012 at 11:03 am
Eye of newt and graveyard dirt
Somethings growing in your shirt
November 9, 2012 at 11:11 am
Blessed B Cup.
November 9, 2012 at 11:09 am
By the magick of these hags
Make some bouncy big fun bags.
November 9, 2012 at 11:16 am
By the power vested in my sack
I now produce an epic rack.
November 9, 2012 at 11:42 am
One, two, Kalamazoo
Three, four, Jersey Shore
Five six West Phoenix
Men will think of you with their dicks.
November 9, 2012 at 11:57 am
Whoops, I just got my cellphone plan changed to T-Mobile. Shit.
November 9, 2012 at 4:39 pm
Now I got big dirty pillows
So I get chased by all the fellows.
November 9, 2012 at 6:45 pm
What ever happened to the good ole’ “I must, I must, I must increase my bust! The bigger the better, the tighter the sweater, so boys depend on us!” mantra?
November 9, 2012 at 9:00 pm
That’s so 20th century. The 16th century is where it’s at.
November 9, 2012 at 10:07 am
I don’t know…I think this is legit. If they can give that dude Bazingas like that imagine what they do for women.
November 9, 2012 at 11:06 am
OK, we have to get one thing clear. “Bazongas” are boobs and “Bazinga” is the new word for “fooled ya” as popularized by Sheldon on ‘The Big Bang Theory’. If this distresses you I’m prepared to make you a hot beverage.
November 9, 2012 at 11:11 am
So this ad is for Bazinga Bazongas?
November 9, 2012 at 11:32 am
This is starting to have a “Dr. Seuss” vibe to it.
November 9, 2012 at 11:38 am
Would you, could you, shake those tits?
Would you, could you, give men fits?
Would you like some bigger boobs?
Do you have some inner tubes?
A bicycle pump
A nice ickle rump?
A jittery jello
A drooly-droll fellow?
Would you, could you, pump your rack?
Could you, should you, nump a Brack?
November 9, 2012 at 11:22 am
Is that optional?
November 9, 2012 at 12:01 pm
It was optional until Mitzi came up with “Bazinga Bazongas”. That needs to break into mainstream use like, yesterday at the latest!
November 9, 2012 at 12:06 pm
I meant the hot beverage part
November 9, 2012 at 12:15 pm
Do not taunt Happy Fun Bazinga Bazongas. Do not drink hot beverages near Bazinga Bazongas. Bazinga Bazongas are made from a glowing green material that fell from space, possibly radioactive.
November 9, 2012 at 1:30 pm
I’d like a hot beverage. That’s the socially acceptable thing to do right?
November 9, 2012 at 10:00 pm
I don’t think you’re distressed but if you feel sick we can sing “Soft Kitty”.
November 11, 2012 at 10:12 am
I called them Bazingas long before this fictional “Sheldon” was ever created. Damn…should have copywritten that.
November 9, 2012 at 10:08 am
I have a great spell that will increase the size of your bank account. Send me $10 and I’ll tell you how to do it yourself.
November 9, 2012 at 10:08 am
My mom is going to be surprised. Breast. Prank. Ever.
November 9, 2012 at 10:09 am
I need some cash. What to do, what to do?
Ooh! I’ll scrape a picture of some hot chick off of someone’s website. Make up some story about a big boob spell. They’ll just send me some money and I don’t have to do anything but send them an email saying I cast the spell.
Nice!
November 9, 2012 at 10:15 am
“Honey, want to go out to dinner tonight?”
“Babe, I can’t- I’ve got all these boob spells to perfor-just kidding. Let’s go to Applebee’s, my treat.”
November 9, 2012 at 10:15 am
Ooh, good find. The presence of distressed wood in the background had me thinking that it was the seller’s photograph of their buddy with implants.
November 9, 2012 at 10:24 am
Yeah, wonder if they can magick up some repairs to the siding of that house. Because if they could, I might be tempted to see if they can fix my basement …
November 9, 2012 at 10:34 am
“We’re having some work done.”
“Do you mean to the leaky roof, or cracked foundation, or damaged siding or peeling paint or raccoon holes or…”
“TO THE WIFE’S TITS, MAN!”
“Oh, of course. So I suppose that means your kids’ braces are going to wait, then?”
November 9, 2012 at 10:39 am
That expanding foam insulation works wonders, as I hear. The wife’s tits end up the size of watermelons and they have a great R-value.
November 9, 2012 at 11:12 am
Isn’t there also some kind of tax rebate for that? Or am I thinking of some other kind of ‘bate?
November 9, 2012 at 11:18 am
Great way to be able to grab boobs and not seem like a perv, by the way.
“I’m just checking your r-value, ma’am. It’s for the environment.”
November 9, 2012 at 11:25 am
“R” Kelly, “In The Closet”, with a set of heavy knockers.
It’s a whole new game of Clue, baby.
November 9, 2012 at 11:34 am
That’s better than “Colonel Mustard in the billiard room with a candlestick”, for sure. Something always seemed icky about that.
November 10, 2012 at 6:10 am
Crazy hoodoo men have to live in run-down shanties. Hey, I didn’t make the rules.
November 9, 2012 at 10:09 am
Make sure you check his references. Last time I bought a voodoo breast enhancement over the internet, all I got was an outtie belly button.
November 9, 2012 at 10:11 am
I bought it for a girl friend, but I ended up with tits on my shoulders. Now I have to wear football gear to cover it up.
November 9, 2012 at 10:17 am
…do you have pictures, maybe?
November 9, 2012 at 10:26 am
Seconded.
November 9, 2012 at 10:26 am
I did. Now they’re the property of the Rhode Island court system.
November 9, 2012 at 10:36 am
“If Matt has seen farther than other men, it is because they’ve spent too much time on his shoulders without looking up.”
November 9, 2012 at 11:07 am
“Climb upon my shoulders. The view is spectacular.”
November 9, 2012 at 11:20 am
“I know you can climb me for giggles and shits
On top of my shoulders I’ve awesome firm round tits
You can see for miles and miles and miles and miles …”
November 9, 2012 at 10:47 am
Malfunctioning GPS will do that to ya.
November 9, 2012 at 12:03 pm
Thanks again, Apple Maps.
November 9, 2012 at 10:13 am
“Yes, I am the owner of the Hollywood Famous & Worldwide Famous “The VOODOO MAGICK Shop”
Cause when I think of Voodoo, magick and big boobs, I think of Hollywood. Ok, just when I think of big boobs.
November 9, 2012 at 10:16 am
Also, which is it, Hollywood Famous or Worldwide Famous?
November 9, 2012 at 10:18 am
“I don’t always think, but when I do, I think about big boobs.”
- The Least Interesting Man In The World Who’s Staring At Your Chest, Ladies.
November 9, 2012 at 10:21 am
He drinks Schlitz. At Hooter’s.
November 9, 2012 at 10:39 am
His idea of shopping for “produce” is getting something from the little basket on the gas station counter that has 2 bananas, an apple and a brown thing in it.
November 12, 2012 at 12:15 pm
His hobbies include visiting different airports to watch the baggage carousels.
November 9, 2012 at 10:13 am
This is a gyp. I offer penis enlargement services for free. Of course, you have to be my type, we have to do it in person, and you have to start flaccid ….
November 9, 2012 at 10:16 am
Now that’s a deal that’s hard to beat.
November 9, 2012 at 10:17 am
I think of it like M&Ms. Melts in my mouth …
November 9, 2012 at 11:36 am
I’m trying really hard to think about baseball right now. But maybe I’ll have to do that in the other room for a few minutes.
November 9, 2012 at 11:47 am
I’ll be in my “bullpen”.
November 9, 2012 at 10:48 am
But good to find.
November 9, 2012 at 10:14 am
I feel myself firming right now! (though the I think the spell was aimed a bit too high)
November 9, 2012 at 10:16 am
“Those who spell Magic with a K aren’t.”
–Anton LaVey
November 9, 2012 at 10:21 am
“Do do that voodoo that you do so well”
—Cole Porter
November 9, 2012 at 10:24 am
I always listen to the Hoodoo Gurus when I do my voodoo.
November 9, 2012 at 10:27 am
Who do voodoo? You do!
(I am so sorry right now)
November 9, 2012 at 10:28 am
While drinking YooHoo?
November 9, 2012 at 10:44 am
I saw Honey Boo Boo do voodoo to Sununu in muu-muu on YouTube.
November 9, 2012 at 10:53 am
Just make sure the fugu was properly prepared, or you’ll be in deep doo-doo. So nu?
November 9, 2012 at 11:49 am
Heh-heh, you implied “blowfish”.
November 9, 2012 at 10:26 am
I wonder if the spell will transfer to my animal nipple brooch and make that bigger instead?
November 9, 2012 at 10:30 am
Then you’d be the proud owner of a Nipple Sombrero! Are-Ole!
November 9, 2012 at 10:46 am
I sí what you did there!
November 9, 2012 at 11:06 am
I señor post too, and I liked it
November 9, 2012 at 10:32 am
Fine print:
Convo me as soon after you’ve had your breast augmentation surgery as possible and you will be amazed at how well this spell works!
November 9, 2012 at 10:46 am
These spells are for professionals only. Please do not try them at home. Donald Trump did, and now he’s just a big boob. (rim shot)
November 9, 2012 at 10:55 am
http://www.myinstants.com/instant/rimshot/
November 9, 2012 at 11:05 am
Something tells me The Donald ordered the “Tighter Ass” spell.
November 9, 2012 at 11:21 am
You’d think his priority spell would’ve been one for a more human-looking hairdo.
November 9, 2012 at 10:51 am
Tell me more about this magickal root work. I’ll bring the chants and oils.
November 9, 2012 at 10:57 am
Proof that this seller is only in it for the money: it’s a perfect opportunity to call the vulnerable buyer from a fake phone number, and ‘cast the spell’ live while asking her to touch herself and describe the experience, while fap-fap-fapping away … but the seller is clearly not as creepy of mind as I would be.
Which is probably a good thing?
November 9, 2012 at 11:05 am
call me!
November 9, 2012 at 11:23 am
“Oh no – low battery warning! Gonna have to fap- I meant wrap this up, now.”
November 9, 2012 at 11:00 am
I got a survey from Etsy today. I filled it out and in the box for comments, I mentioned the resellers. I should have mentioned the imaginary items up for sale, eh?
November 9, 2012 at 11:03 am
“Want larger perfect beautiful round breasts that look natural ?”
Well, that seems contradictory.
Large, natural breasts do NOT look like that!
November 9, 2012 at 2:13 pm
When I’m lying on my back, MY large, natural breasts look at the window (right) and the closet (left). And yes, I do know why I’m single.
November 9, 2012 at 2:30 pm
Is it because you’re always lying on your back at home? You should get out and meet people, standing upright.
pro tip: Most guys don’t care if boobs defy gravity or not. We’re happy just to get to play with them.
November 9, 2012 at 2:36 pm
I think it’s that I lie on my back and think, “It sure is peaceful here with nobody around.” I have appalling judgment when it comes to picking men, so I’m on a self-imposed break. And yes, I’m quite well acquainted with men and their relationship with boobies.
November 9, 2012 at 5:16 pm
Are we the same person? Because we have largely the same situation(s). My judgement has been so bad that recently my very intrest in a guy is enough to quench my interest in him.
November 9, 2012 at 11:04 am
Why does he have to send you an email letting you know that the spell has been performed? Shouldn’t you know by the increase in your boob-size? C’mon, it’s either magic, or it isn’t. {rolls eyes}
November 9, 2012 at 11:08 am
Many are the wonders of the Placeboob Effect …
November 9, 2012 at 11:26 am
I would go the extra mile and send them a too-small bra with the size label changed. It’s called CUSTOMER SERVICE dammit!
November 9, 2012 at 10:22 pm
This is such bullshit. Everyone knows magick isn’t real. If you must increase that bust, you have to turn to the mystical wisdom of the Orient.
The first time I saw the Breast Stim the commercial was in Japanese. I can’t decide if the white dude with the computer a minute in is just an actor they hired to give the product a nice veneer of science, or if that is a real guy who is currently holding both the titles of King of Skeeves and Happiness In Employment World Champion.
November 9, 2012 at 11:59 am
I want to see the Paypal dispute for that one.
November 9, 2012 at 11:08 am
Part of me screams fake fake fake but another part of me says if you are that gullible you deserve to waste 25 dollars on trying to make bigger boobs. Have at it.
November 9, 2012 at 11:17 am
Would you like the part of you that screams fake to be any larger?
November 9, 2012 at 11:28 am
Would you like me to increase the size of your gullibility from the comfort of my own home?
November 9, 2012 at 11:38 am
Let’s stop beating around the bush. We should have a talk about Scientology.
November 9, 2012 at 11:50 am
It is the pink elephant in the room.
November 9, 2012 at 3:29 pm
Are you saying you don’t need to buy two spells, one for each boob?
November 9, 2012 at 3:30 pm
Or maybe you mean 3 spells, one for each boob?
November 9, 2012 at 10:09 pm
If you’re implying that the third man in this scenario is the booob, then I just want to…wait boobs? Booooooobs! Mmmmmmmmmmm…
November 9, 2012 at 11:14 am
So, for middle aged guys a steady diet of Beer and Pork Ribs is Magic.
November 9, 2012 at 11:17 am
what the heck is going on with my last few posts?
They showed up, then disappeared…
?
November 9, 2012 at 11:29 am
It’ll get better in a spell?
November 9, 2012 at 12:28 pm
Witch posts disappeared?
November 9, 2012 at 12:38 pm
I think I see the sorcerer of our problems.
November 9, 2012 at 2:16 pm
I love you guys
November 9, 2012 at 11:24 am
NOBODY BUY THIS SPELL FOR ME!…. I’m about to fall over as is. ;-D
November 9, 2012 at 11:27 am
Reductio!
November 9, 2012 at 11:33 am
Oh magik elixir and ectoplsamic medium
Fill Mothertrucker’s breasts with helium.
Fixed it!
November 9, 2012 at 11:41 am
With magic wand and candle lights
Her D’s become mosquito bites
November 9, 2012 at 11:54 am
With MY spell she doesn’t have to buy new clothes! And she can go braless!
November 9, 2012 at 12:00 pm
Yeah, but now she can’t see anything!
November 9, 2012 at 12:07 pm
I prefer to say things are looking up for her!
November 9, 2012 at 12:09 pm
She can have a cute funny voice any time she wants, too!
November 9, 2012 at 12:40 pm
She just has to tie a string around any nursing babies and carry then around like balloons!
November 9, 2012 at 12:25 pm
Could they “majick” away some of my post-baby belly fat and I’d like a boob lift and reduction as well. Get on that, “majickal” awesomeness fairies!
November 9, 2012 at 12:33 pm
T-Boner Mobile…
November 9, 2012 at 12:55 pm
November 9, 2012 at 1:38 pm
Could always ask the guy or gal who bought the ab toning if it works…
http://www.etsy.com/transaction/98898029
November 9, 2012 at 1:59 pm
Do you suppose he has a breast lift spell too? I know they say lifts don’t last as long as augmentation but I am a D cup already and I want something perky but more natural than hoodoo augmentation.
November 9, 2012 at 2:31 pm
I’m only interested if he can also change the size of the smell.
November 9, 2012 at 2:51 pm
November 9, 2012 at 3:25 pm
I’ll bet the spell just makes you go over to White Castle and eat 20 burgers a day. Then you get bonus big butt cheeks, probably with nipples too.
November 9, 2012 at 6:07 pm
If big boobs aren’t your thing, you could get a woman instead!
http://www.etsy.com/listing/113939493/get-a-woman-papa-hoodoo-magic-voodoo?ref=correlated_featured
Though showing Chatty Cathy when advertising “woman” does not seem entirely… accurate. It’s no wonder the buyer in the picture is about to bite her~
November 9, 2012 at 10:16 pm
I got this spell and it turned me into a puppy! Gotta say I couldn’t keep the dames off me, though.
November 10, 2012 at 4:57 am
I’m tempted to buy this ‘spell’, then send the seller a picture of my generously proportioned boobies and complain that they went overboard and made them too big.
November 10, 2012 at 3:29 pm
I’d send my ironically bearded face and a mammography image to claim that the spell stopped my menstrual flow, vilified me, and gave me a breast tumor.
November 12, 2012 at 10:58 am
November 12, 2012 at 11:00 am
http://youtu.be/YeO8TX7eXIo