Ever since male nipples stopped contributing to breast-feeding they’ve been on the lookout for something to occupy their time that doesn’t have “twister” in the description.
I like the Moobs.
Does FTW stand for “for the win?”
So many letters, so many options.
Four Times Wrong?
Found The Willy?
Fuck Three Watermelons?
Free Tits Worldwide?
YES! I saw Tom Jones, and I thought that I might be channeling my inner mother-in-law in Vegas.
(cuz, you know, what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas…except if you have a smart phone and Gramma’s got extra panties in her purse)
I think that’s the picture from the cover of his “Greetings from the Jersey Shore” album. If I’m not mistaken, that album came with 2 coupons for hair gel inside.
This is not a bad picture, just a typo. He meant to write, “Bruce Springstein”. Springstein, while not as famous as Springsteen, was well-known accountant from the late 70′s, known mostly for wearing a clean leather jacket while auditing peoples taxes.
The seller said they paid “several hundred dollars” in 1982 and it took a “beach vendor” 3 days to make it. Now I know whose picture that is in the gold frame that says “#1 Sucker” on the Santa Monica boardwalk. The vendor is still spoken of in hushed and reverent tones.
He’s selling “Hurricane Sandy Insurance”-you know, just in case it comes back around again. His patented selling method, called the “high-pressure system” is very circular in its reasoning and tends to work very well with suckers.
I love how the seller goes on and on about how much her sister loved this sweatshirt, but she’s . . . giving it up? For $20, even though it supposedly cost hundreds?
Is this place deader than usual because of the storm?
I’m going on my 3rd night without power or running water at home. It sounds like I may get it back by late Friday night. Everyone else alright out there?
Whoa, awesome!! Go hog the RI hot water supply! (Why does this remind me of that Simpsons episope where Homer makes an air conditioned tent out of the open refrigerator…?)
I would like to suggest a Nativity Scene, in any medium, with Cornelius and Zira as Joseph and Mary; and Chimpanzeesus in the manger. I don’t have money to offer but somehow, a bitch will get paid for doing that.
October 31, 2012 at 10:05 am
We’re going streaking! On the paper! …there’s more people coming, they’re right behind me.
October 31, 2012 at 10:07 am
My first thought was Hasselhoff + Mutant Eskimo Monkey Owl Jebus, but Ferrell works, too.
October 31, 2012 at 10:13 am
I was thinking more Khadafi + Andre the Giant myself, but hey, beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
October 31, 2012 at 10:32 am
I saw Adam Sandler.
October 31, 2012 at 11:15 am
The Hoff + Adam Sandler as drawn by the Mutant Eskimo Monkey Owl Jebus lady.
November 1, 2012 at 10:24 am
me too. wedding singer adam sandler.
October 31, 2012 at 10:48 am
I was thinking Will Ferell + a steamroller…
October 31, 2012 at 11:09 am
Pretty sure it just needs a little form underneath it to help define the shape. Everything looks better as a tattoo.
October 31, 2012 at 11:54 am
Nowadays, people aren’t interested in art that isn’t tattooed on fat guys.
October 31, 2012 at 1:23 pm
That guy’s on loan from the Louvre.
October 31, 2012 at 12:33 pm
How is it that his boobs go up and down at the same time?
October 31, 2012 at 12:51 pm
Why is that offensive? I’m genuinely curious. They appear to have cleavage above and below- I’ve never seen that before.
October 31, 2012 at 1:02 pm
I’m getting the thumbs down too. Someone might be extra sensitive. I’m on a roll today offending. Whoops.
I guess my inner snark is getting Holier Than Thou.
October 31, 2012 at 1:24 pm
That’s just how that guys rolls. Leave him alone. *cringes*
October 31, 2012 at 10:41 pm
Thats why Bruce is the hardest working man in showbusiness
October 31, 2012 at 12:39 pm
i feel like his nipples are extra something… not sure what the word is. Plump? Gooey? But they seem to be following me.
October 31, 2012 at 1:26 pm
Ever since male nipples stopped contributing to breast-feeding they’ve been on the lookout for something to occupy their time that doesn’t have “twister” in the description.
October 31, 2012 at 1:55 pm
how about nurple?
October 31, 2012 at 2:10 pm
As long as it’s not purple, it’s okay.
October 31, 2012 at 2:33 pm
Good save!
October 31, 2012 at 10:42 pm
Moobs FTW!
November 1, 2012 at 4:28 am
I like the Moobs.
Does FTW stand for “for the win?”
So many letters, so many options.
Four Times Wrong?
Found The Willy?
Fuck Three Watermelons?
Free Tits Worldwide?
October 31, 2012 at 1:53 pm
my first thought was Hoff and Tom Jones
October 31, 2012 at 6:58 pm
YES! I saw Tom Jones, and I thought that I might be channeling my inner mother-in-law in Vegas.
(cuz, you know, what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas…except if you have a smart phone and Gramma’s got extra panties in her purse)
October 31, 2012 at 6:39 pm
I was getting a kind of “Jeff Corwin with a jeri-curl” vibe from it.
October 31, 2012 at 7:16 pm
I totally think there’s a dash of Hasselhoff in there, too.
October 31, 2012 at 10:42 pm
Dashelhoff!!~
October 31, 2012 at 10:53 pm
I know the Boss isn’t getting any younger, but I didn’t think he looked THAT bad.
October 31, 2012 at 10:07 am
Looks more like Little Nicky to me.
(God that movie was a piece of shit.)
October 31, 2012 at 10:08 am
If that was Bob Ross, I might have bought it.
October 31, 2012 at 10:12 am
There ya go: Bob Ross + Little Nicky + Smeary Jesus = That
October 31, 2012 at 10:09 am
I think that’s the picture from the cover of his “Greetings from the Jersey Shore” album. If I’m not mistaken, that album came with 2 coupons for hair gel inside.
October 31, 2012 at 10:09 am
Andre the Giant should be in that equation somewhere.
October 31, 2012 at 10:11 am
Just logged in to say this. I have been defeated.
That is exactly what this painting looked like from afar when I saw it on facebook… I swear!
October 31, 2012 at 10:10 am
When I first looked at this picture, I thought it was Fezzik without sideburns…
October 31, 2012 at 10:11 am
I’m seeing a little bit of Juan Epstein from “Welcome Back, Kotter” in there.
October 31, 2012 at 12:17 pm
Dang, I just posted a comment with Juan in it. I gotta read comments first! That’s definitely who I saw.
October 31, 2012 at 10:13 am
Looks like the bastard child of Andre the Giant and Adam Sandler was run over by a steamroller.
October 31, 2012 at 10:18 am
Don’t forget Michael Landon and Donny Osmond when making the family tree.
October 31, 2012 at 10:18 am
Peter Brady x Adrienne Barbeau.
October 31, 2012 at 11:43 am
October 31, 2012 at 11:48 am
WHICH REMINDS ME. If Netflix can bring us back Arrested Development, can we also have Carnivale?
October 31, 2012 at 10:19 am
They got one thing right in the title: “Summer 1982″. There’s no question about that. A state fair classic.
October 31, 2012 at 10:24 am
That needs to go out for a ride and never come back.
October 31, 2012 at 10:28 am
It would be the perfect sweatshirt for smothering someone with. If you were so inclined, that is…
October 31, 2012 at 10:36 am
Same with the “crazy neck” sand stacking thingys. It shared a booth with the airbrush guys at our fair.
November 1, 2012 at 10:13 am
I see what you did there.
October 31, 2012 at 10:24 am
+ Carmine from Laverne & Shirley
October 31, 2012 at 10:48 am
I thought it was Don Stark, Bob from “That 70′s Show”.
http://www.imdb.com/media/rm2345048320/nm0823155
October 31, 2012 at 11:40 am
Yep..in his younger years…..
October 31, 2012 at 10:51 am
I legitimately thought that was Tom Jones.
October 31, 2012 at 11:02 am
Bruce Springsteen? Where?
October 31, 2012 at 11:38 am
He’s behind that ugly sweatshirt.
October 31, 2012 at 11:18 am
This is not a bad picture, just a typo. He meant to write, “Bruce Springstein”. Springstein, while not as famous as Springsteen, was well-known accountant from the late 70′s, known mostly for wearing a clean leather jacket while auditing peoples taxes.
October 31, 2012 at 11:42 am
To have your taxes done by him was truly a Mitzvah.
October 31, 2012 at 12:03 pm
Like a wizard he was, with the deductions and credits!
October 31, 2012 at 12:06 pm
Those were the glory days of accountancy!
October 31, 2012 at 11:20 am
Looks like someone was Blinded by the Light while making this. In the Badlands. Or maybe it’s a Brilliant Disguise?
(And that’s just the B’s of The Boss’s catalog! I’m on Fire!)
October 31, 2012 at 11:29 am
This needs to be sent down the tunnel of love, never to return!
October 31, 2012 at 11:48 am
It ripped the balls from my back but, I didn’t actually care for those ones so I guess it’s OK.
October 31, 2012 at 11:47 am
The seller said they paid “several hundred dollars” in 1982 and it took a “beach vendor” 3 days to make it. Now I know whose picture that is in the gold frame that says “#1 Sucker” on the Santa Monica boardwalk. The vendor is still spoken of in hushed and reverent tones.
October 31, 2012 at 12:31 pm
I heard he sold 1400 air-conditioners in Fairbanks, Alaska. He is truly King of Salespersons.
October 31, 2012 at 12:42 pm
He’s selling fallen leaves right now on Etsy and just raking it in. I mean he’s raking it in, selling them, and then raking it in again.
October 31, 2012 at 12:49 pm
He’s selling “Hurricane Sandy Insurance”-you know, just in case it comes back around again. His patented selling method, called the “high-pressure system” is very circular in its reasoning and tends to work very well with suckers.
October 31, 2012 at 1:13 pm
He was selling “Y2K Bug Fixes” through 2008! To the government!! And they were just AOL discs that had been spray painted olive drab on one side!!!
October 31, 2012 at 1:19 pm
I hear he’s the #1 dealer of buggy whips in North America, and he counts at least 1000 non-Amish customers among his sales.
October 31, 2012 at 1:30 pm
HE SELLS RELAXATION TAPES TO CATS!
October 31, 2012 at 1:31 pm
HE SELLS DEVIL’S FOOD CAKE TO EVANGELICAL PREACHERS!
October 31, 2012 at 1:56 pm
He sells 10-speed bicycles to hipsters.
October 31, 2012 at 2:37 pm
With a “Fixie-Downer Kit” that’s just a pair of snips for the brake and gear cables. ($50 extra)
October 31, 2012 at 12:55 pm
I love how the seller goes on and on about how much her sister loved this sweatshirt, but she’s . . . giving it up? For $20, even though it supposedly cost hundreds?
Yeah, something’s definitely not adding up here.
October 31, 2012 at 12:16 pm
Juan Epstein meets the Backstreet Boys.
October 31, 2012 at 12:22 pm
The airbrushing skill level of the artist who did this t-shirt is actually pretty good.
The problems (as I see them) are:
1. Doesn’t look anything like Bruce Springsteen.
2. David Hasselhoff called and he wants his hair back.
3. Sweatshirt photographed at an odd angle, which makes the painting look all out of whack.
4. Try as we might, we can’t go back to 1982.
Yes I realize I put too much thought into this post!
October 31, 2012 at 1:39 pm
Is this place deader than usual because of the storm?
I’m going on my 3rd night without power or running water at home. It sounds like I may get it back by late Friday night. Everyone else alright out there?
October 31, 2012 at 1:52 pm
Sorry to hear that, Matt. Hope your home and family are OK otherwise.
I’m far away from the coast – my thoughts are with everyone dealing with the aftermath.
October 31, 2012 at 1:57 pm
Good Golly, man! You’ll be driven to lootin’ n’ shit in no time!
October 31, 2012 at 2:14 pm
I just got word- IT’S BACK ON!!!! I’m gonna take so many fuckin’ showers tonight! I might just run the blender for no reason at all, too.
I’m also gonna get caught up on all those Dr. Phil shows I’ve missed. I’ll bet there were some really tender moments.
October 31, 2012 at 2:23 pm
Whoa, awesome!! Go hog the RI hot water supply! (Why does this remind me of that Simpsons episope where Homer makes an air conditioned tent out of the open refrigerator…?)
October 31, 2012 at 4:14 pm
If “the package store” has ice, vodka and mixer you might have a damn good reason to run the blender.
October 31, 2012 at 5:28 pm
“And so, kids, that’s how Pawtucket was renamed Margaritaville…”
October 31, 2012 at 2:22 pm
Did the gubmint save R.I. any FEMA or were you overlooked again?
Stay warm and unthirsty, my friend.
October 31, 2012 at 2:39 pm
I never saw any FEMA stuff. But we didn’t need it, at least in my town.
When I leave work in like 2 seconds, my first stop is the package store (“liquor store” to the rest of everybody).
October 31, 2012 at 1:45 pm
Uh-oh I tawt I taw Paul Michael Glaser!
October 31, 2012 at 2:32 pm
I would like to suggest a Nativity Scene, in any medium, with Cornelius and Zira as Joseph and Mary; and Chimpanzeesus in the manger. I don’t have money to offer but somehow, a bitch will get paid for doing that.