Peck of the Day
- Submitted by Emily
As you know, Etsy hand-picks a muted selection of desaturated creaminess to feature on their front page, using a very specific selection method. And by specific selection method, I mean throwing corn on a keyboard, and going with whatever the chicken pecks out.
Here’s today’s featured item, hand pecked by the Etsy Hipster Chicken.
PEOPLE WHO LIKED BED OF LIGHT ALSO LIKED:
CHAIR OF DARK
COUCH OF CONTRAST
LENS FLARE ON ATM
October 27, 2012 at 4:03 pm
I somewhat disappointed they didn’t jump at the chance to use “bokeh” in the description.
October 27, 2012 at 5:16 pm
I was looking for that too!
October 27, 2012 at 4:09 pm
YET MORE IN THIS SERIES:
“Deer in Headlights”
“Meth Lab on Fire”
October 27, 2012 at 4:19 pm
“Sunset on Resellers Cargo Boats”
“Your Lips on My Ass”
October 27, 2012 at 4:20 pm
Oh, wait, that last one just sold out…
October 27, 2012 at 8:44 pm
Bed of lettuce with ‘lite’ dressing.
October 27, 2012 at 9:25 pm
Goatsee on fire
October 28, 2012 at 7:12 pm
Sepia-tones Hon-dashi with Dissolve Vegan Ahi and Ramens.
October 27, 2012 at 4:10 pm
How silly. They’re completely covering up the birthing stains.
October 27, 2012 at 4:13 pm
Maybe people with severe astigmatism would be interested, at least?
October 27, 2012 at 4:15 pm
That last photo looks like a J.J. Abrams film.
October 27, 2012 at 4:29 pm
October 27, 2012 at 4:50 pm
I was totally reading this in a Marlin Perkins, Mutual of Omaha nature documentary kind of voice.
October 27, 2012 at 4:50 pm
“Short in Electric Blanket”.
October 27, 2012 at 5:01 pm
I’m actually surprised they didn’t place the lights like a person lying there and try to claim it was angels, or fairies, or ghosts or something else unworldly.
October 27, 2012 at 5:05 pm
The important thing is that it’s out of focus, because otherwise it might look silly.
October 27, 2012 at 8:57 pm
It should be titled “Bed of Blur “.
October 27, 2012 at 5:08 pm
I never knew that all these years of throwing out photos I took when I was 9 with a disposable Kodak, I was actually sitting on a financial GOLDMINE.
“My Easter Basket”
“Mom’s Half-Made Bed”
“Girl Scout Camp Tent”
SIGNED BY ME ON THE BACK, ORDER NOW
October 28, 2012 at 8:35 am
(gasp) With a Kodak? For real?!
October 27, 2012 at 5:56 pm
I want all of these photos on my wall, just so I can make my professional-photographer friends wince when they walk in the door.
Seriously though, I took better pictures with a mac power book camera when I was sixteen.
October 28, 2012 at 8:37 am
My own professional photographer friends would reply that we can’t judge art and they’d have something to say about the theory and the deconstruction underlying this one.
October 27, 2012 at 5:57 pm
Actually, these look much better when I take off my glasses. Probably because I can’t read the descriptions of what they’re supposed to be.
October 27, 2012 at 5:58 pm
“Crap, I Spilled the Sequins”
October 27, 2012 at 6:11 pm
No no no, this is Etsy. There are only “sequence”.
October 27, 2012 at 6:21 pm
Ooh, that’s right! My bad.
October 27, 2012 at 6:11 pm
“Picture does not do this item justice” was not in the description? Awwwwwwwwwww………..(DAMN)!!
October 27, 2012 at 6:40 pm
Aardvark on fire
October 27, 2012 at 6:46 pm
Hamster in hammock
October 27, 2012 at 9:00 pm
Faerie light gathering
October 27, 2012 at 7:32 pm
“Mickey Mouse In A Rubber House”
“Alley Oop In A Leisure Suit”
“Moisture Induced Glitter Clumping”
October 27, 2012 at 8:23 pm
Hm, “Moisture Induced Glitter Clumping”… anyone play drums?
October 27, 2012 at 11:05 pm
I think that they are the opening act for Pussy Riot. They love that clumping stuff.
October 28, 2012 at 6:28 am
I’m a drummer, Mystik! You in need of a beat? Who’s gonna pump the fat bass, though?
October 28, 2012 at 9:41 am
Oh! Me! Pick me!
October 28, 2012 at 9:47 am
I’ve dated enough bass players that something must have stuck.
And I’ll play Dr. J.B.-style.
October 28, 2012 at 1:02 pm
I just know you were pronouncing “bass” the wrong way in your head when you wrote this, Matt.
October 28, 2012 at 3:38 pm
I read it as bass (the fish) every time! fist pumping bass (the fish) crack me up. They don’t have elbows.
October 27, 2012 at 8:04 pm
The ellipses in the description concern me. I feel like I’m missing a valuable part of the title – “bed of light…”. I like to think that it’s supposed to be “bed of light steampunk” because clearly those lights are focal condesors to collect the positive energy to power the levitation contraption located within the copper piping.
October 28, 2012 at 1:38 am
I think that’s just where you’re supposed to pause, take a breath, and reflect upon the sheer artistic genius of the photographer. Or perhaps upon your life and the fact that you’re considering paying good money for a photo of a hideous sparkly duvet.
October 28, 2012 at 7:46 pm
take a breath or sigh thoughtfully while carelessly gazing into the distance, wind lightly tussling your hair?
October 27, 2012 at 10:31 pm
I wanted to find a gif from Grinch Night where the Grinch tells Ukariah Who to put his glasses back on! But my googlefu is failing me.
October 27, 2012 at 11:25 pm
It’s sad but we have to be understanding. When cupcakes see something that looks like glitter their brains freeze up like an SUV on its last quart of oil.
October 27, 2012 at 11:31 pm
“Honey, I finally took down the Christmas lights, what do you want me to do with them?”
“Just throw them on the kid’s bed and I’ll take a picture for etsy.”
“Of Christmas lights on a bed? Why would anyone buy that?”
“It’s etsy. Someone will buy that shit if I make it blurry.”
October 28, 2012 at 1:36 am
“This item made it to the front page of Etsy.” Presumably they were short on ballroom gowns made from bin liners that week.
October 28, 2012 at 4:24 am
“6×4 inches of fine art”
What more could a person want from life?
October 28, 2012 at 8:33 am
Custom printed by WalMart?
October 28, 2012 at 8:41 am
The 4in part concerns me a little, but generally speaking you happened to be close to what I was thinking about right now.
October 29, 2012 at 7:29 am
Maybe that’s circumference.
October 28, 2012 at 6:07 am
On Monday I dropped my camera taking pictures for a client. The lens hit the ground and it no longer focuses. Now I know how I am going to pay for a new camera! Thanks etsy!
October 28, 2012 at 7:35 am
As I look at the pictures I had taken to send to my mother about three things I was absolutely positive: First, Edward was a vampire. Second, I was too clumsy to focus a camera. And third, I should have washed the sheets after his last visit.
October 28, 2012 at 7:58 am
Officials have ruled that the fire, and Little Johnny’s subsequent electrocution, resulted from a combination of the boy’s recurrent bed-wetting and a short in the Christmas lights sewn to his comforter.
October 28, 2012 at 10:36 am
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
October 28, 2012 at 3:01 pm
They could have put this gem on the front page instead.
http://www.etsy.com/transaction/66204204
Because nothing says “art” like an out of focus picture of someone stepping on Christmas lights.
October 28, 2012 at 4:04 pm
Sold.
I’m thinking of making money by being eager to create fake buyer accounts and “buy” neglected items for a small fee, what do you think?
October 29, 2012 at 1:04 am
I woke up today with bed head of light! I was wondering where that string of Christmas lights went.
October 29, 2012 at 6:31 pm
To me, that “Bed of light” reminds me of Death Bed, after it’s just eaten someone and its yellow digestive foam is still all over it
November 3, 2012 at 12:14 pm
That one pic was more Stool of Dark, no?
November 3, 2012 at 2:39 pm
If it is, you might want to see a doctor.