Excuse me guys, I can’t comment, I need to go take a poo. But don’t worry, I’m gonna spray glitter on it and then sell it in Etsy. Shabby Shit Brooches for all!!
If any FJLs out there like the Adoorables, my cats just made some for me and I’d be happy to send them for cost of S&H. Please don’t inundate me with replies; you don’t have to rush. My supply is virtually unlimited.
Oh, and I can also change the smell from venison to tuna if you request.
The first one is a shame because the seller has some really nice stuff in his/her shop.
My theory is that the turd was supposed to be this http://www.etsy.com/listing/106190837/reserved-for-attractedtorooftops-raw but either the seller screwed up and/or had leftover pieces and said WTF, let’s see if I can sell this crap too.
I had a friend that looked like that once. I remember it well because I had just had some yummy punch from that nice lady Blueberry Moonlilly at that barter faire.
I need an outside source to settle the debate the Mr & I have been having about poop games. Rule #3 has been heavily debated.
1 – Talking about poop is funny
2 – Poop games, with actual poop, is NOT funny
3 – accessories or tchotchkes that resemble poop ?????
No. 1 looks like the worm that crawls out on the sidewalk in a summer shower and doesn’t make it home in time. No. 2 looks like the penis equivalent of a Hand of Glory. No. 3 has at least the hammered finish to distinguish it from poo, No. 5 is too shiny and glittery for the Real Thing, but No.4? Nope, that’s card-carrying, fully accredited, no side-stepping it poo.
the third one is surely a great paperweight, especially when it leaves a pile of rust on the paper, as seen in the photo. “kinda sharp” – even better!
The first one – great job with all this “turning silver into old wood” thing. Nobody would ever think you are wearing a silver ring on your finger. To me, it seems like something fishermen know well – a long forgotten, dead and dried earthworm.
All Aboard the Failboat!
October 21, 2012 at 10:24 am
I accidentally read one of the descriptions as “stabby chic.” Which coincidentally happens to be an accurate account of my feelings towards these listings.
October 20, 2012 at 10:03 am
“A bit o’glitter for effect.” *facepalm
October 20, 2012 at 10:44 am
you beat me to it! “just a spoonful o’ glitter helps the medicine go down”
October 20, 2012 at 10:03 am
The “sheep” look like pieces of corn!
October 20, 2012 at 1:03 pm
My dog popped out some sheep like that once & we put her on a dewormer.
October 21, 2012 at 11:04 am
This os going to be the way I refer to taking a dump from now on. “I need to go count the sheep.”
October 20, 2012 at 10:03 am
And as a bonus, some even look like penises as well. Rotting zombie penises.
October 20, 2012 at 10:32 am
Rotting Zombie Penis would be a kick ass band name.
October 20, 2012 at 11:14 am
The second one looks like a mummified thumb… (plus some hand entrails)
October 20, 2012 at 11:23 am
Definitely a down thumb (the thing, not you)
October 20, 2012 at 12:28 pm
yeah, my first thought was, better call homicide!
October 20, 2012 at 10:07 am
The Adoorables item is actually based on a trip the artist took to the Hankey country estate.
October 20, 2012 at 11:44 am
Isn’t that in Hershey, PA?
October 20, 2012 at 3:59 pm
It’s just down the highway from there.
October 20, 2012 at 7:51 pm
It’s around the corner from the lemonade stand.
October 20, 2012 at 7:52 pm
But if you reach the dairy, you’ve gone too far north.
October 20, 2012 at 8:01 pm
it’s squirting out over here..bring the immodium
October 20, 2012 at 10:14 am
I suggest the alternate title; “Etsy Dump of the Day”
October 20, 2012 at 11:43 am
The “dook of url”.
October 20, 2012 at 10:21 am
I am more often Gnarly than I am Smooth.
October 20, 2012 at 10:35 am
Wow, I have been throwing away a goldmine of shit (sometimes quite literally) when doing yard work. “Oh, that’s an interesting shape.” Toss.
October 20, 2012 at 11:24 am
I throw away several “Adorables ” villages when I clean my cat box. We’re shitting out a goldmine twice a week.
October 20, 2012 at 11:58 am
You could’ve had your own TurdTown by now! Maybe even a ShittyCity.
October 20, 2012 at 1:14 pm
Are you kidding? I could have constructed the “Great Wall of Feces ” by now. Not to mention “Urea Caverns.”
October 20, 2012 at 10:35 am
“I love imitating nature with very simple techniques.”
October 20, 2012 at 10:46 am
I love it when “vintage, rusty, rustic, shabby” really means… tetanus shot.
October 20, 2012 at 4:15 pm
Especially when “one end is kind of sharp.” Makes the tetanus delivery so much more efficient!
October 21, 2012 at 11:41 am
The rusted metal stuff could warrant it’s own catagory…Tetanus Town? Metal Mayhem? Rust Never Sleeps?
October 20, 2012 at 10:47 am
All the poos down in pooville…
October 20, 2012 at 2:49 pm
His fart grew 3 sizes that day?
October 20, 2012 at 11:01 am
Human-shaped? It does not mean what you think it means. Unless it’s a decapitated half-octopus/half-human hybrid in which case you’re spot on.
October 21, 2012 at 2:41 am
Turd with tentacles, most favorite ever. Now add watch parts and call it steampunk.
October 20, 2012 at 11:05 am
Excuse me guys, I can’t comment, I need to go take a poo. But don’t worry, I’m gonna spray glitter on it and then sell it in Etsy. Shabby Shit Brooches for all!!
October 20, 2012 at 12:26 pm
Me, too. I mean, me poo.
October 20, 2012 at 11:18 am
If any FJLs out there like the Adoorables, my cats just made some for me and I’d be happy to send them for cost of S&H. Please don’t inundate me with replies; you don’t have to rush. My supply is virtually unlimited.
Oh, and I can also change the smell from venison to tuna if you request.
October 20, 2012 at 11:28 am
What size smell?
October 20, 2012 at 3:44 pm
Depends on the weather – if you want a large smell I suggest ordering the “two-cat tuna” variety in the month of July.
October 20, 2012 at 11:28 am
I can add yarn if you want color. Cats are accomodating like that.
October 20, 2012 at 11:25 am
The first one is a shame because the seller has some really nice stuff in his/her shop.
My theory is that the turd was supposed to be this http://www.etsy.com/listing/106190837/reserved-for-attractedtorooftops-raw but either the seller screwed up and/or had leftover pieces and said WTF, let’s see if I can sell this crap too.
October 20, 2012 at 11:29 am
Oh you can get those big S-shaped ones at Taco bell. You have to wait a day or so for delivery, though.
October 20, 2012 at 11:46 am
Sometimes it’s delivered much, much quicker.
October 20, 2012 at 11:56 am
What sort of humans is the “Peony Root” person hanging out with? I don’t know any humans that look like that.
October 20, 2012 at 12:27 pm
Human shaped? No.
Cthulu shaped? Very possibly.
October 20, 2012 at 12:44 pm
Ph’nglui mglw’nafh Cthulhu Etsy wgah’nagl fhtagn
October 20, 2012 at 1:14 pm
I had a friend that looked like that once. I remember it well because I had just had some yummy punch from that nice lady Blueberry Moonlilly at that barter faire.
October 20, 2012 at 5:19 pm
Translation, courtesy of Google: “In his house at Etsy dead Cthulhu waits dreaming”.
October 20, 2012 at 7:03 pm
I saw a Cthulhu cocksock pattern for sale on there.
October 23, 2012 at 10:54 am
October 20, 2012 at 12:41 pm
Does the third one come with a free tetanus shot?
October 20, 2012 at 1:23 pm
I need an outside source to settle the debate the Mr & I have been having about poop games. Rule #3 has been heavily debated.
1 – Talking about poop is funny
2 – Poop games, with actual poop, is NOT funny
3 – accessories or tchotchkes that resemble poop ?????
October 20, 2012 at 1:56 pm
Hmmm, that’s a tough one. I’d say they’re not the funniest thing ever, but could be kind of funny. Especially if they weren’t meant to resemble poop.
I think coprolites are pretty funny.
October 20, 2012 at 2:07 pm
Coprolites are hysterical. Especially when you hand one to someone and then explain exactly what it is. XD
October 20, 2012 at 3:49 pm
“It’s a piece of…history!”
October 20, 2012 at 1:30 pm
I think the last seller should start meeting humans before decomposition process has begun.
October 20, 2012 at 1:54 pm
Is that turd shaped root sitting on a piece of bread?
October 20, 2012 at 2:04 pm
No. 1 looks like the worm that crawls out on the sidewalk in a summer shower and doesn’t make it home in time. No. 2 looks like the penis equivalent of a Hand of Glory. No. 3 has at least the hammered finish to distinguish it from poo, No. 5 is too shiny and glittery for the Real Thing, but No.4? Nope, that’s card-carrying, fully accredited, no side-stepping it poo.
October 20, 2012 at 3:24 pm
I think R is going through its anal phase.
October 20, 2012 at 3:48 pm
I sense a poop theme going on at Regretsy. And by sense, I mean smell.
October 20, 2012 at 5:17 pm
If I saw any of these in my back yard, I’d be heading to the vet immediately.
October 20, 2012 at 8:07 pm
http://youtu.be/3IjTtmcXyDs
October 21, 2012 at 1:49 am
the third one is surely a great paperweight, especially when it leaves a pile of rust on the paper, as seen in the photo. “kinda sharp” – even better!
The first one – great job with all this “turning silver into old wood” thing. Nobody would ever think you are wearing a silver ring on your finger. To me, it seems like something fishermen know well – a long forgotten, dead and dried earthworm.
October 21, 2012 at 6:22 am
Good lord, do I love the people selling (and presumably buying) rusty metal on Etsy. It’s a fine example of the market correcting itself.
Also, that last poo-piece looks a bit like me after I’ve been alcohol preserved, too.
October 21, 2012 at 10:24 am
I accidentally read one of the descriptions as “stabby chic.” Which coincidentally happens to be an accurate account of my feelings towards these listings.
October 21, 2012 at 8:06 pm
#4
The perfect gift for the person who has always wanted a matching set of turd shaped butt plugs.
October 21, 2012 at 8:30 pm
The ‘pendant’ looks like part of a bog body