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Always ask for references

“Honey, the plumber is passed out in the living room. He’s got the guest soap on his forehead, and he took the peppermill.”

58 comments on Always ask for references

  1. sparklything
    October 7, 2012 at 3:08 pm

    Honey, that’s not the pepper mill. That’s my dildo.

    Thumb up Thumb down +77

  2. steviesegel
    October 7, 2012 at 3:09 pm

    I always suspected that Etsy was a pyramid scheme….

    Thumb up Thumb down +153

  3. Seibee
    October 7, 2012 at 3:10 pm

    I think my grandma has a rug like that.

    Thumb up Thumb down +11

    • NanaB
      October 7, 2012 at 4:30 pm

      If hers comes with a youngish man on it, I stand in awe of her. Tell her we should talk.

      Thumb up Thumb down +28

      • OldPhatMC
        October 7, 2012 at 4:33 pm

        I knew it. You like your men the way you like your carpets: without piles.

        Thumb up Thumb down +47

        • manybellsdown
          October 7, 2012 at 5:29 pm

          Slighty shaggy and flat on the floor.

          Thumb up Thumb down +63

        • lizzy1
          October 8, 2012 at 2:57 am

          Or taken out and beaten when they get dirty?

          Thumb up Thumb down +16

      • sparklything
        October 7, 2012 at 6:51 pm

        At least he’s not wearing black sock, take what you can get for free!

        Thumb up Thumb down +1

    • Stretch65
      October 8, 2012 at 12:50 am

      “It’s a metal kind of a rust color.
      It’s what pennies used to be made of”
      —–copper Pyramid

      Thumb up Thumb down +7

    • GranoblasticMan
      October 8, 2012 at 8:18 am

      That rug really ties the room together.

      Thumb up Thumb down +6

      • GranoblasticMan
        October 8, 2012 at 8:19 am

        Aaaand I should’ve read the rest of the tread. Sorry, late to the party.

        Thumb up Thumb down +1

        • GranoblasticMan
          October 8, 2012 at 8:20 am

          tread thread

          I’ll just go sit in the corner now…

          Thumb up Thumb down +5

          • SiliconeSunflower
            October 8, 2012 at 8:45 am

            Don’t worry — with a pyramid, you get quite a few corners to choose from.

            Thumb up Thumb down +10

  4. upscumbag
    October 7, 2012 at 3:18 pm

    Trying not to imagine what he uses for a sundial.

    Thumb up Thumb down +48

  5. SciFiMagpie
    October 7, 2012 at 3:20 pm

    Aren’t they supposed to be doing this skyclad, in a field? Or are bad Hawaiian shirts and jeans de rigeur for mystical ceremonies now?

    Thumb up Thumb down +33

    • Wilma Fingerdoo
      October 8, 2012 at 7:30 am

      Chanting, “I do not have Plumber’s crack. I do not have Plumber’s crack.”

      Thumb up Thumb down +9

  6. onemore
    October 7, 2012 at 3:20 pm

    It was supposed to be a surprise! He’s just testing the Copper Meditation Myramid that I got you for Christmas. I wanted him to see if the pipes were working OK.

    Thumb up Thumb down +6

  7. Shaniataint
    October 7, 2012 at 3:21 pm

    Restorative Yoga never looked so unpleasant.

    Thumb up Thumb down +24

  8. LeeLooDallas
    October 7, 2012 at 3:23 pm

    Caulk Like An Egyptian.

    Thumb up Thumb down +120

  9. reddogbon
    October 7, 2012 at 3:43 pm

    “Honey, the plumber is passed out in the living room – again.”

    Thumb up Thumb down +7

  10. finklefairy
    October 7, 2012 at 3:54 pm

    This looks far too much like the frame for the Princess Barbie tent I had as a little girl. Shit. I had no idea it’d still be fun to hang out in as an adult.

    Thumb up Thumb down +27

    • angel drawers
      October 7, 2012 at 5:42 pm

      It doesn’t look like that much fun.

      Thumb up Thumb down +14

      • finklefairy
        October 7, 2012 at 7:37 pm

        Add in drugs and it’s basically Disneyland for fluffy Pagan types.

        Thumb up Thumb down +13

        • kat-grrl
          October 8, 2012 at 9:20 am

          Us non fluffy pagan types HATE this shit.

          Thumb up Thumb down +7

  11. Chronic Glitter Lung
    October 7, 2012 at 4:14 pm

    Does it break the magic if your knees stick out the sides like that?

    Or does it at least prevent your knees from getting the healing powers?

    Thumb up Thumb down +50

    • Hurricane
      October 7, 2012 at 4:54 pm

      That’d explain how every plumber I’ve ever interacted with seems to have bad knees. I always figured it was from all the jumping over things.

      Thumb up Thumb down +37

    • maclare
      October 8, 2012 at 8:15 am

      All he had to do was scoot back a foot or so! His head has plenty of room! He’s not centered!

      I have plenty of feels about this!

      Thumb up Thumb down +9

  12. RosieB
    October 7, 2012 at 4:40 pm

    I’m pretty sure that’s Kevin Murphy of MST3k.

    Thumb up Thumb down +15

  13. slovaksiren
    October 7, 2012 at 4:47 pm

    I wonder if that guy takes his pyramid where he goes and just randomly lies down somewhere in public and suddenly begins meditating.

    Thumb up Thumb down +22

    • docleather
      October 7, 2012 at 5:07 pm

      pyramiding is the new fad, taking over planking and teapotting.

      Thumb up Thumb down +32

      • slovaksiren
        October 7, 2012 at 7:27 pm

        yeah, that is what I was thinking, he may be starting a cool new fad! We just think he is crazy, but this dude might be seriously onto something.

        Thumb up Thumb down +4

  14. LeeLooDallas
    October 7, 2012 at 5:06 pm

    If that guy charges anything like the plumber from our home renovation, than that really is a $25,000 Pyramid.

    Thumb up Thumb down +34

  15. Glasgow
    October 7, 2012 at 5:22 pm

    Is anyone else reminded of the Jeanine Turner character from Northern Exposure who had rotten luck with boyfriends (they all died) and one was struck by a falling space satellite to the point where man and machine were so intertwined they had to bury him that way? Kind of looked like this.

    Thumb up Thumb down +17

    • Danny Potter
      October 7, 2012 at 10:27 pm

      That Show was Awesome, wasn’t it? Sure wish they’d revive that one on Netflix. I wonder if they respond to petitions.

      Thumb up Thumb down +5

  16. thecreightonberyl
    October 7, 2012 at 5:30 pm

    “I’m not really any more relaxed. But the Wi-Fi reception is great!”

    Thumb up Thumb down +31

  17. Agent_of_Chaos
    October 7, 2012 at 6:13 pm

    Ok, so I googled “Meditation Pyramid” and I still don’t get it. Why does one NEED a pyramid to meditate in? Why does that pyramid seem claustrophobicly small and have no walls, only edges? Is this some sort of geometry class conspiracy?

    Thumb up Thumb down +13

  18. Tante
    October 7, 2012 at 6:36 pm

    I want to rush into a Cathedral and plead for “Psychic Sanctuary”.

    Thumb up Thumb down +9

  19. chris91
    October 7, 2012 at 7:04 pm

    “And I really liked that rug man.”

    “Yeah, it really tied the room together.”

    Thumb up Thumb down +16

  20. Pandactyl
    October 7, 2012 at 7:24 pm

    I can’t imagine that I could even go into a meditative state laid out on the floor uncomfortably like that… though, if I had enough beers, maybe…

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

  21. Mystik Spiral
    October 7, 2012 at 8:45 pm

    Crochet – you have won me over with this post.

    Thumb up Thumb down +9

  22. MammaDuck
    October 8, 2012 at 5:36 am

    Why must it be used in the supine position? If that dildo/bong/butt plug was attached properly to the top, there are lots of other positions I can envision its use in.

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  23. maclare
    October 8, 2012 at 8:02 am

    //checks price of copper tubing//

    hey, what do you know… something on Esty that’s NOT overpriced!

    Stupid, but not overpriced.

    Thumb up Thumb down +8

  24. Matt Johnson
    October 8, 2012 at 9:54 am

    I don’t know anything about meditation gear (peppermill, forehead crystal, plumbing pyramid?), but I feel like he should be fully inside that thing. His knees are breaking the 3rd and 4th walls, and that seems wrong to me. Don’t get me wrong, he seems relaxed, but his knees look all tense and nervous.

    Thumb up Thumb down +8

  25. Matt Johnson
    October 8, 2012 at 9:56 am

    And in the interest of full disclosure, there have been times in my youth when I took a metric shitload of acid and did things very similar to what that guy’s doing. But I was on acid- what’s his excuse?

    Thumb up Thumb down +7

    • Chronic Glitter Lung
      October 8, 2012 at 7:05 pm

      Do you have any reason to think he’s NOT on acid? Aside from the fact that he’s crawled inside a copper piping pyramid with a peppermill?

      Thumb up Thumb down +4

  26. FuzzyHeroics
    October 8, 2012 at 10:16 am

    Thumb up Thumb down +6

  27. fenrislorsrai
    October 8, 2012 at 11:14 am

    I keep looking at this guy and swearing “I have seen him before.” except he’s in Colorado and I’m in Connecticut.

    Unless he’s using the pyramid to become someone else I know…

    Thumb up Thumb down +1

  28. RevW
    October 9, 2012 at 2:13 pm

    So that’s why my plumber did not fix my pump on Sunday. The lazy SOB was in someone else’s living room with his equipment propping up a pyramid leg.

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

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