Actually, this is a thing. First bought them over 20 yrs ago at a feminist bookshop, and never had a problem with them – they are less irritating to the vajayjay, easier to use than tampons, and easy to clean unless perhaps in public bathrooms. The feminist bookshop has since closed, the sponges are now available at the healthfood shop, just a tad too expensive. So, yes, this is a thing, and quite a normal one with my crowd.
I started using Diva Cup when a friend of mine had a pretty awful TSS scare…most people naively consider that ironic. I love it. Did you make those figurines?
Though it’s not really for me, I can see why some people would want to use those instead of tampons.
However, how can they be EASIER to use than tampons? The only way that this is possible would be if I just open my legs and the sponges find their way themselves.
…
Uhm yeah, kinda interesting mental image…. ANYWAY…
I guess what I really wanted to say was that since I have never had any problem with a tampon in all my life, I cannot quite picture easier to use than that.
Especially since we’re talking about something you cannot just throw away and be done with, but have to put somewhere until you can clean it properly.
You can also buy the cups. Same thing only they rinse up much easier. Any local Walgreens has them. Instead cups, or the health food stores carry Mooncups, Diva cups and they go by several other names and brands. Much easier to use, more eco friendly and one of the side effects- minimal to NO cramping. Bonus!
The nice thing for me is the ease of changing. As long as you aren’t in a public restroom, you can simply rinse it out, squeeze, and return it to, er, base. Even in a public restroom, you can blot them out with TP in an emergency. Very convenient, and no more expensive than tampons, even if you toss ‘em after a cycle, which I do.
Have never needed a special mason jar, a cloth bag, or directions, though.
Then you might be able to explain what the bag is for.
Also, I can’t see why feminists would care about promoting an alternative that is less easy to use, messier, less hygienic and way more time-consuming to women.
The thought of someone pants-less and hunched over using a “cramming stick” to shove a sea sponge up their vagina is one the stranger things I’ve thought about in a while. Like since yesterday.
Oh look!!! They have a “GreenMoon” for the lucky girls who are “just starting” their menstruation. Those poor girls. Already slightly horrified by the bleeding, cramps, bloating, and now they offer THIS to cram in there?
Ahhhh, another reason to be thankful I’m past menopause!!!! (did it early, got it over with while still relatively young and energetic enough to mess around, NEENER-NEENER!!!!)
Hopefully we’ll have it available for the Fondle, too.
+23
Stretch65
October 2, 2012 at 11:51 am
One section needs to include Mittens and one Pedo-Bear because those are the two things that come to mind when I think Regretsy sex. I’ll be with Chris Hansen and take a seat over there
Surprise me.
Anyway, what if it were both a “tip of the day” plus an on-going cringe-inducing purposefully goofy “crowd sourced” craft-based post-inspired erotic novel?
Like today could be:
“I’ve always wanted a man to bathe me, head to toe,” she thought as he approached with the sponge.
But even she – she of the dark thoughts, the inner longings – could not imagine what he was about to suggest…
Well that does it, I will officially be starting an email list for a fuckery-fueled erotica book. There will be a rotation, and we will each write it one sentence at a time.
We will sell the final copy for a $2 donation to Regretsy Fund. Leave your email in this thread if you’d like to be included.
ZIPPY! I was hoping you’d join in. It is now complete *steeps hands and grins wickedly*
Ok, I got Zippy, AutobotDen and snafutti added to the list. I have to close it out now because I’ve already organized everything, and god knows I suck at organizing.
Thank you all for being so sexually enthusiastic! (Geez, how many times a week do I say THAT?)
+4
Tante
October 2, 2012 at 10:17 pm
cawstic@aol.com
YES-A muthertrucking O-L!
I kick it old school!
“After you’ve drained a six pack of PBR cans in short order, don’t throw away the plastic holder- with a little creative scissor work, you’ll be the proud owner of 6 upcycled cock rings! You’re welcome.”
What will dirty hippies think of next? I really don’t want details on the cleaning process. Don’t accidently leave that out on the bathroom sink unless you want to give the rest of the family nightmares. Some things don’t need to be “green”. Really.
My favorite part is the fact that something died to make this. Sea sponges are animals, and part of some very delicate ecosystems. How “green” is that?
::Warning – history geek comment about to follow:: Women used to use sea sponges soaked in vinegar or lemon juice as birth control. Not much different than a Today Sponge actually. However, that doesn’t excuse the fact that some lunatic hippy is selling this crap on Etsy.
And the Egyptians used alligator dung crammed in their for birth control. How long do you think it will be before that’s on Etsy? I’m kind of surprised if it’s not already.
So wait, this can be used multi-purpose?
All you have to do is put it in at the start of your period, take it out at the end, rinse in vinegar, and put it back in to avoid pregnancy like some kind of vaginal contact lens?
….actually sea sponges make much much better “tampons” than tampons. No risk of TSS. Which involves so much more nastiness. You think this is gross? Try having all the skin on your extremities peel off
-Yay seasponges and cups says definitely-not-hippy!
I’m not buying the “No risk of TSS.” argument. TSS happens when women leave their tampons in too long. Why wouldn’t leaving a sea sponge in for over eight hours have the same effect? Just because it’s from Mother Earth doesn’t mean it won’t hurt you.
BTW, TSS is so rare now the CDC doesn’t even bother to track it anymore.
Pom-Poms Make It Better
October 2, 2012 at 2:31 pm
TSS is pretty rare now.
I’d buy the “it’s more comfortable” argument, though. So many things in the world are more “normal” but also more skin-irritating (for me, anyway.)
I’m still not sure I’d be comfortable crammin’ a sponge up there, though. Especially one packaged in a mason jar with a suspicious-looking bottle of “vinegar.”
Don’t get me going on cups. I had a bad experience with cups.
(Have you ever been awakened in the dead of night by something moving rapidly inside your va-jay-jay, while sleeping alone? Never again with the cups.)
I’m anywhere from 35-70 years old.
My car has anywhere from 2-4 tires on it.
You need anywhere from 1500-3000 calories a day.
You have anywhere from 15 to 30 years left to live.
Wouldn’t you want a more specific shelf life for the sea-sponge-tampon?
I think a king-size bottle of advil, a pack of those chemical heat things you wear under your clothes, and a giant bag of M&M’s would make a good menarche gift.
It’s about time somebody started doing something about this insane overabundance of yacht-scraping coral reefs! Now, if you ladies could find a place to cram barnacles, I wouldn’t mind atoll.
“Most sponges are hermaphrodites (function as both sexes simultaneously), although sponges have no gonads (reproductive organs). Sperm are produced by choanocytes or entire choanocyte chambers that sink into the mesohyl and form spermatic cysts”
You really want your daughter to be stuffing “spermatic cysts” all up in her business?
While the kit itself is a bit hippie-dippy and mockworthy, sea sponges make AWESOME menstrual products. They’re comfy, less likely to cause problems than tampons, nice and gentle to the bajingo – the environmentally-friendly thing is basically just a bonus.
Yeah. That was more or less my experience with the Diva Cup. ‘Breaking the seal’ at removal involved shrieking in pain and the absolute conviction I was going to end up holding my uterus. Home hysterectomy!
Tampons soaked in moonshine? So you could get drunk through your vajay and never fail a breathalyzer test! Genius! Drunk driving has never been so easy!
OK, I think I’m missing something here (like my period; haven’t seen it since Jan 2010, WOOHOO!) but what the fuck is the BAG for? Do you cram the bag up in your snatch too?
I get the jar is for soaking in the vinegar (do you rinse out the vinegar? wouldn’t straight vinegar be TOO acidic for your hoohaw – who wants the walls of their vag to get chemical burns) but how do you use the bag? To soak it? To carry a wet sponge in your purse? To carry a used icky wet sponge back home in your purse? Why is it a cloth bag then? And wouldn’t the size of the smell give it away? Imagine sitting at your desk at work, with that lovely old blood smell wafting from your purse. Ewwwww.
I can’t believe that the size of the smell was used **in context**. I can’t believe it. It just completes my day after seeing the two guys who meet on the street kiss spontaneously, singing Kurt Weil in german (I don’t speak german) with a choir of people in their sixties, finding a dartboard on the street and taking it home, and getting ready to pull a half-nighter working. Now I know that I can.
And I was always in the Tsunami category as far as flow goes. ONE sponge a day is not going to cut it. I’d either be in the bathroom, rinsing out a sponge every hour and grossing the hell outta my coworkers (seriously, would you want to use the sink after someone did that?) or have like 8 of them sitting in my purse stinking up the place.
And if you don’t manage to squeeze it nearly dry, do you get water dripping down your leg afterward?
OK, I can see using these at home, but I can’t wrap my head around how to manage for an 8 hour work day, plus travel time.
Never had a problem. Wrap it in a big wad of toilet paper and squeeze, and it’s fine. And they’re little enough that wringing the water out is no problem.
But if you flow really heavily, it might be an issue. I’m pregnant now, but if I wasn’t, I wouldn’t use these for teaching, because I just can’t get to the bathroom whenever I feel like it.
Of all the “no-no-no”s inherent in this post, my first thought was: Any time there was a Mason jar involved, regret surely followed. Not sure if that makes me tragically hip, or humiliatingly hayseed. (Hint: it’s the second one)
~cue dream sequence~
I’m in college and my 300lb RA knocks on my door and tells me she needs my help in her room. I thought her blinds fell down again so I happily followed her. She tells me she got a Today sponge (Anyone remember those? No? Google it.) stuck in her vag. Would I help her get it out? This is the same RA that allows all kinds of shenanigans and lends money to poor college fucks but HELLLLL NO am I gonna dig around in another girl’s vag for some sponge. I told her I was prone to fainting at the sight of body parts. (Yes, I pulled that out of my ass) I was off the hook.
~end dream sequence~
I started to like you Crochet for the brilliant View It In A Room but now that I have you to thank for tonight’s nightmare, I’d like to kick you in the shins. Bastard.
I once lost an OB tampon up there. Those dumb little threads? Get lost.
And all those reassuring pamphlets for girls just starting to use tampons? “What if the string gets lost?” “Well, just gently pull it out with your fingers. Trust us. It’s no big deal.”
OBs are little. This one was in deep. The human hand does not fit up in there like that at that angle. Took me forty-five minutes to retrieve, and I am still relieved it wasn’t an ER visit.
I once lost an OB tampon up there. Those dumb little threads? Get lost.
And all those reassuring pamphlets for girls just starting to use tampons? “What if the string gets lost?” “Well, just gently pull it out with your fingers. Trust us. It’s no big deal.”
OBs are little. This one was in deep. The human hand does not fit up in there like that at that angle. Took me forty-five minutes to retrieve, and I am still relieved it wasn’t an ER visit.
For those of us who like to exit the stall with red fingers, wring out our bloody sponge in the movie theater sink, and tuck it back into our purses next to our chewing gum.
“Thanks Summer’s Eve! Now I’m not only fresh and confident, but I can choose to smell like a fresh, stormy sea, (but I wish that seagull would quit following me!)or an orchard at the end of the season! You really do make this tart grow fonder!”
anybody who has time to rinse out blood soaked sponges to any kind of hygenic standard needs better things to do with their time. Seriously, thrush anyone????
all the brain bleach and vodka in the world cant make me unsee the mental images suggested here. thanks to all of you I may have to take up drinking. oh and this is #2 on my list of things to avoid buying from esty.
Wow, the comments seem to gush forth when this topic comes around. It’s almost like everyone’s happy to see it, despite anny temporary awkwardness it causes. Maybe Regresty should just fit it in once a month or so.
There are two things here; women would love to talk more about their issues-that-nobody-gets-why-they’d-have-to-face-in-the-first-place, and these are never talked about anywhere else. All forms of public discussion, expression and art happily ignore a world where at least one fourth of the population needs a couple of days medical leave per month.
Also, if you like this one then you’ll love the threads about giving birth.
Where can I find these threads, please, Ma’am? I SO want to share about how my 4th token of love smelled like a koala bear when she entered the outer world, cause I had been on a serious eukalyptus-oil-pill diet for months before delivery, due to an AB-resistant sinusitis which cost me part of my septum, btw. Oh and how the midwife and the turkish pedriatician jumped in horror, getting sprayed with blood after they told me to “get out the afterbirth fast, and in one piece, please” – which I did at once cause this made me laugh so hard that the placenta popped out and hit the floor 5 feet away, bursting in a gust of bloodshed…. AAAAh the pleasures of motherhood.
Someone please explain to me what is so disgusting about a little blood soaked sponge?
By the way, after leaving here I came across this giant piece of politically correct bullshit that came from nowhere. I guess some woman is stoned to death right now for being human. Too bad we are already insulted beyond our capacity by Victoria’s Secret’s use of arcane symbolic icons.
This might be because I was a giant gay man (who’s slightly traumatised by some of the comments here) but… How the hell is that supposed to fit in a vagina. And how do they get it out again?
October 2, 2012 at 10:03 am
I’m sorry, but if it goes in the bajingo, when it comes out it gets disposed of, not dunked in salad dressing and shoved back in.
October 2, 2012 at 10:04 am
What if it was balsamic vinegar? It’s classier, and hipper.
October 2, 2012 at 10:11 am
I have ranch and thousand island. Will those work in a pinch?
October 2, 2012 at 10:17 am
I’m no gynecologist (I play one in my tool shed, however), but I foresee issues with ranch dressing.
October 2, 2012 at 11:02 am
Are they Hidden Valley?
October 2, 2012 at 11:36 am
Hidden Valley’s the only brand with the patented “E-Z Glide Applicator Tip”.
October 2, 2012 at 2:28 pm
Nah, Quaker.
From the listing:
“For those unwilling to soak their sponge in their oatmeal bowl.”
October 2, 2012 at 7:23 pm
I’d prefer soy sauce, thank you.
October 2, 2012 at 10:06 am
My husband was kind of pissed off when I put him out by the dustbin immediately after sex…
October 2, 2012 at 10:28 am
He knew you were a Buzzkill when he married you, though.
October 2, 2012 at 10:34 am
I think he would have been even angrier if I covered him in salad dressing.
October 2, 2012 at 11:56 am
Before or after sex?
October 2, 2012 at 4:23 pm
Makes me think of a scene in Empire Records. “Hope you like bleu cheese!”
October 4, 2012 at 5:05 pm
I was thinking you were going to say, “hey, you forgot your thingy.”
October 2, 2012 at 10:44 am
Gives a whole new meaning to “eating out” doesn’t it.
Bleurgh.
October 2, 2012 at 6:52 pm
I must agree. I’ve used sponges, and like them, but when my period is over, I toss the thing. Yes, you can sterilize them, but why?
October 2, 2012 at 6:52 pm
Bajingo always cracks me up. Is that like a five-string open-backed Merlin bajingo, or a four-string tenor bajingo?
October 3, 2012 at 2:58 pm
every time they say bajingo i hear Mumford and Sons in my head…..
October 2, 2012 at 10:03 am
It’s better than their first attempt using sand dollars and sea cucumbers.
October 2, 2012 at 1:47 pm
I just hope they don’t sell dildos make out of Portugese Man of War.
October 2, 2012 at 3:50 pm
The spiny sea urchins were problematic as well.
October 2, 2012 at 10:04 am
Is this actually a thing? Do you use this if you want to pretend you’re the little mermaid or something?
October 2, 2012 at 11:12 am
Actually, this is a thing. First bought them over 20 yrs ago at a feminist bookshop, and never had a problem with them – they are less irritating to the vajayjay, easier to use than tampons, and easy to clean unless perhaps in public bathrooms. The feminist bookshop has since closed, the sponges are now available at the healthfood shop, just a tad too expensive. So, yes, this is a thing, and quite a normal one with my crowd.
And now back to the regularly scheduled snark.
October 2, 2012 at 12:03 pm
I think some of our snark just got snatched – by reality!
October 2, 2012 at 1:05 pm
You said snatched.
October 2, 2012 at 5:31 pm
Someone convince me that ‘reusable tampons’ are not a recipe for infection. I’m dead serious. How can you be sure you’ve washed it enough? Ew.
October 2, 2012 at 7:49 pm
I’ll just stick to my silicone DivaCup, kthx.
October 3, 2012 at 7:52 am
I started using Diva Cup when a friend of mine had a pretty awful TSS scare…most people naively consider that ironic. I love it. Did you make those figurines?
October 2, 2012 at 1:47 pm
Still not gonna buy them from etsy. You have no idea if they’re sterile or not.
October 2, 2012 at 1:48 pm
No applicator, no string for removal, requires cleaning . . . how on earth is that “easier to use”?
October 2, 2012 at 4:24 pm
Yes. I also need to know the mechanics of this product.
October 3, 2012 at 7:53 am
If you soak them in salt water first, they crawl up in there on their own. You don’t even have to wash your hands after.
October 4, 2012 at 1:48 pm
Think about it like someone that isn’t afraid to touch their own vagina.
October 2, 2012 at 2:21 pm
Though it’s not really for me, I can see why some people would want to use those instead of tampons.
However, how can they be EASIER to use than tampons? The only way that this is possible would be if I just open my legs and the sponges find their way themselves.
…
Uhm yeah, kinda interesting mental image…. ANYWAY…
I guess what I really wanted to say was that since I have never had any problem with a tampon in all my life, I cannot quite picture easier to use than that.
Especially since we’re talking about something you cannot just throw away and be done with, but have to put somewhere until you can clean it properly.
October 2, 2012 at 3:44 pm
You can also buy the cups. Same thing only they rinse up much easier. Any local Walgreens has them. Instead cups, or the health food stores carry Mooncups, Diva cups and they go by several other names and brands. Much easier to use, more eco friendly and one of the side effects- minimal to NO cramping. Bonus!
October 2, 2012 at 6:59 pm
The nice thing for me is the ease of changing. As long as you aren’t in a public restroom, you can simply rinse it out, squeeze, and return it to, er, base. Even in a public restroom, you can blot them out with TP in an emergency. Very convenient, and no more expensive than tampons, even if you toss ‘em after a cycle, which I do.
Have never needed a special mason jar, a cloth bag, or directions, though.
October 3, 2012 at 1:32 am
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
October 3, 2012 at 11:26 am
Mermaids don’t have vaginas, silly goose. It wasn’t really the legs Ariel was after.
October 2, 2012 at 10:05 am
They say “apple cider vinegar” but it looks like… something else.
October 2, 2012 at 10:07 am
To me it looks like Robitussin.
October 2, 2012 at 11:27 am
They must have upcycled the bottles when they were done drinking it.
October 2, 2012 at 11:47 am
Better be codeine. Because that’s the only way I would use this.
Fuck. We know I’m lying. I’d drink the codeine and throw the rest in the trash.
October 2, 2012 at 1:12 pm
Actually your body would absorb the codeine faster if you put it on the sponge before inserting it. Or so I hear.
October 2, 2012 at 3:55 pm
If I’m drinking codeine, I don’t think I have the coordination needed to jam a medicine bottle up my cooch for a quicker high.
October 2, 2012 at 10:05 am
They really should have including a “cramming stick” made of driftwood.
October 2, 2012 at 10:06 am
Argh, foiled by autocorrect once again.
October 2, 2012 at 10:26 am
The thought of someone pants-less and hunched over using a “cramming stick” to shove a sea sponge up their vagina is one the stranger things I’ve thought about in a while. Like since yesterday.
October 2, 2012 at 10:48 am
With a little practice you can balance the sponge on the stick-end of a plunger and squat.
October 2, 2012 at 10:57 am
That would be way less awkward looking.
October 2, 2012 at 11:05 am
What about a compressed air cannon? It could be called the hoo-howitzer.
October 2, 2012 at 11:25 am
The “Nerf-Sof Sea-Sponge Shooter”.
Say that 5 times fast.
October 2, 2012 at 3:45 pm
You guys are just not safe for work… Thank you for that!
October 2, 2012 at 3:46 pm
I’m so glad I wasn’t drinking anything when I read this. Yowzah!
October 2, 2012 at 11:29 am
That would be the ONLY way a T-Rex could use this.
October 2, 2012 at 1:13 pm
Won’t someone think of the T-Rexes??
October 3, 2012 at 9:17 am
Is that what Helen Keller’s maid was doing by leaving the plunger in the toilet? Helping her to insert her sea sponge…
I bet her parents feel bad for firing the maid after they found this out.
October 2, 2012 at 10:06 am
If that’s the “starter pack”, what do the “seasoned veterans” use?
October 2, 2012 at 10:07 am
Matress pad.
October 2, 2012 at 10:07 am
Sham-wow and Merlot.
October 2, 2012 at 10:11 am
I would think you’d need lots of Merlot to be able to get the mattress pad/Sham-wow in.
October 2, 2012 at 10:44 am
Bounty and Newmans Own Italian
October 3, 2012 at 9:07 am
Baby bunnies and Dorothy Lynch
October 2, 2012 at 10:07 am
Same thing but the sponges are bedazzled.
October 2, 2012 at 10:21 am
“For the lucky girls just beginning menstruation.”
Lucky?! When I read that I wanted to punch whoever wrote it in the face.
You could even say I saw red.
October 2, 2012 at 12:29 pm
I sea what you did there.
October 2, 2012 at 10:08 am
Oh look!!! They have a “GreenMoon” for the lucky girls who are “just starting” their menstruation. Those poor girls. Already slightly horrified by the bleeding, cramps, bloating, and now they offer THIS to cram in there?
http://www.etsy.com/listing/68601563/greenmoon-package?ref=pr_shop
October 2, 2012 at 10:11 am
Why the hell did they include a “lunar calendar.” Biology 101, the “red tide” is in fact not actually a tide.
October 2, 2012 at 10:13 am
Unless it has to do with contaminated clams….
October 2, 2012 at 10:47 am
“Who lives in a mason jar under the sea SEA SPONGE REDPANTS”
October 2, 2012 at 10:35 am
Don’t you mean Communism 101?
October 2, 2012 at 10:13 am
Seems to me that if “toxic shock” is gonna happen, it’s definitely gonna happen with a sketchy looking sponge.
October 2, 2012 at 1:23 pm
I wouldn’t be toxic shocked one bit
October 3, 2012 at 11:36 am
Those sponges look suspiciously like the sea sponges you find at Michaels or Joanns. Hope she used a 40% off coupon. Those things are expensive.
October 4, 2012 at 5:11 pm
I use those sponges for making pottery! I was thinking, YAY, bang for my buck!
October 2, 2012 at 10:09 am
Getting your first period ever is strange and awkward and lots of other things… being told to shove a sea sponge up there makes it traumatising.
October 2, 2012 at 10:09 am
Ahhhh, another reason to be thankful I’m past menopause!!!! (did it early, got it over with while still relatively young and energetic enough to mess around, NEENER-NEENER!!!!)
October 2, 2012 at 10:10 am
it’s a genetic quirk…the women in our family all tend to “change” in late 30′s, early 40′s…plenty of “whoopee” left!!!
October 2, 2012 at 10:22 am
Dude, I’m in my late 40′s and going through “the change” and I’ve got plenty o’ whoopie left in me, I’ll tell ya what!
October 2, 2012 at 10:30 am
Late 50′s and ditto!
October 2, 2012 at 2:25 pm
Early fif … fif … nope, STILL can’t say that f-word … and I never had much whoopie at all.
October 2, 2012 at 10:10 am
Yikes, that thing looks about five times the size of any tampon I’ve ever seen. Am I really supposed to fit that in my bajingo?
October 2, 2012 at 10:14 am
You’ve gotta squeeze it in your fist, then cram it in super quick, before it rapidly expands. It’s as easy as that.
October 2, 2012 at 10:26 am
“You’ve gotta squeeze it in your fist, then cram it in super quick, before it rapidly expands…”
Is this the beginning of the Regretsy Sex-Tip-of-the-Day Calendar?
October 2, 2012 at 10:29 am
I KNEW we weren’t still talking about tampons…
October 2, 2012 at 5:19 pm
damnit I am getting goatse with this visual.. not good.
October 2, 2012 at 10:30 am
I smell a spinoff! We’ll write it together, Mystik, ok?
October 2, 2012 at 10:41 am
Dude…. it would be amazeballs. Can you imagine? Zippy, too!
I’m glad you’re smelling a spinoff, because after this post, I just smell low tide.
October 2, 2012 at 10:49 am
Deal. Me, you and Zippy’s “Hot Regretsy Sex Tips n’ Shafts of the Day”.
October 2, 2012 at 10:54 am
SOLD! I’ll contact my publisher. We commission the “Say What?!” guy to illustrate.
October 2, 2012 at 10:59 am
By “publisher”, do you mean “Mom”?
October 2, 2012 at 11:01 am
My “publisher” is “an ink jet printer”.
October 2, 2012 at 11:07 am
Good news! Amazon has already picked it up for their “Nookie”! WE’RE RICH!!!!!
October 2, 2012 at 11:21 am
Hopefully we’ll have it available for the Fondle, too.
October 2, 2012 at 11:51 am
One section needs to include Mittens and one Pedo-Bear because those are the two things that come to mind when I think Regretsy sex. I’ll be with Chris Hansen and take a seat over there
October 2, 2012 at 10:30 am
Please let this be happening… I want to know just how many days we’re going to focus on toys made from barnwood.
October 2, 2012 at 10:45 am
Depends how many days we can dedicate to deep cavity splinter removal and DIY tetanus shots.
October 2, 2012 at 10:52 am
My calendar’s wide open.
October 2, 2012 at 10:59 am
How about your tool shed?
October 2, 2012 at 11:15 am
50 Sheds of Grey
October 2, 2012 at 1:09 pm
“Labias, Baby!”
October 2, 2012 at 2:17 pm
Hm. Maybe I will kepp that book on How to make your own sex toys.
October 2, 2012 at 11:27 am
Hey – I want in!
October 2, 2012 at 11:32 am
Front or Back Door?
October 2, 2012 at 11:56 am
Surprise me.
Anyway, what if it were both a “tip of the day” plus an on-going cringe-inducing purposefully goofy “crowd sourced” craft-based post-inspired erotic novel?
Like today could be:
“I’ve always wanted a man to bathe me, head to toe,” she thought as he approached with the sponge.
But even she – she of the dark thoughts, the inner longings – could not imagine what he was about to suggest…
Proceeds to April’s Army?
October 2, 2012 at 1:52 pm
Well that does it, I will officially be starting an email list for a fuckery-fueled erotica book. There will be a rotation, and we will each write it one sentence at a time.
We will sell the final copy for a $2 donation to Regretsy Fund. Leave your email in this thread if you’d like to be included.
October 2, 2012 at 2:08 pm
You know I do!
gipsy_moth@yahoo.com
We’ve already got one sentence: “There will be a rotation” Hehehe
Bring on the fuckery!
October 2, 2012 at 2:09 pm
Of course I’m in.
flatearthrebirth@gmail.com
October 2, 2012 at 2:18 pm
Goddamnit. My pervy reply was supposed to go here. Fuckit. My email address is angel.laveaux@gmail.com.
October 2, 2012 at 2:39 pm
vicogin@gmail.com
October 2, 2012 at 3:34 pm
Pick me pick me!
thebeermitt@gmail.com
October 2, 2012 at 4:12 pm
Count me in.
plembot@gmail.com
October 2, 2012 at 4:18 pm
SOLD.
lynnie.laughs@yahoo.com
October 2, 2012 at 5:06 pm
tsirlinator@gmail.com
October 2, 2012 at 5:26 pm
I’m in too. Email is my screen name @gmail
October 2, 2012 at 6:51 pm
What the hell. Mom and dad are both dead now anyway.
rabidbadger48@gmail.com
October 2, 2012 at 7:52 pm
Ok, the email has been sent! Thanks to everyone who is participating!
October 2, 2012 at 7:57 pm
This is gonna be epic.
dendiana.productions@gmail.com
October 2, 2012 at 9:00 pm
too late to add me to the mailing list? mafender@hotmail.com
October 2, 2012 at 9:02 pm
Son-of-a..! Mine’s brucewxyz@gmail.com I had a thing! And stuff!
October 2, 2012 at 9:26 pm
ZIPPY! I was hoping you’d join in. It is now complete *steeps hands and grins wickedly*
Ok, I got Zippy, AutobotDen and snafutti added to the list. I have to close it out now because I’ve already organized everything, and god knows I suck at organizing.
Thank you all for being so sexually enthusiastic! (Geez, how many times a week do I say THAT?)
October 2, 2012 at 10:17 pm
cawstic@aol.com
YES-A muthertrucking O-L!
I kick it old school!
October 3, 2012 at 12:28 pm
Orionova@gmail.com
I better not get a bot infestation from this…
October 3, 2012 at 1:55 pm
I really hope its not too late to join in, because this sounds hilarious.
clydetcat@gmail.com
October 3, 2012 at 9:55 pm
ME, ME ME! Count me in, I have been writing shonky erotica in my filthy mind for years! Finally a chance to traumatise others! YAY!
moonzombie13@hotmail.com
October 4, 2012 at 10:07 pm
My lady boner is at the ready!
asacher@conncoll.edu
October 2, 2012 at 10:37 am
The tip is just a tease. I request the entire shaft-of-the-day please.
October 2, 2012 at 11:12 am
We’ll cover the ins and outs of uploading, with and without attachments. And there will be some internet crap.
October 2, 2012 at 11:20 am
In n’ Out Burger has already signed on as a sponsor.
October 2, 2012 at 11:55 am
Tell them we will provide the secret sauce Matt
October 2, 2012 at 12:12 pm
We’ll call it “ectoplasm”.
October 2, 2012 at 12:24 pm
I really like ectoplasm
October 2, 2012 at 2:10 pm
We know, Stretch, we know.
October 2, 2012 at 12:26 pm
“I want your hot meat glistening with that sauce that only you can make!”
“Thank you, Ma’m. That’ll be 3.99, please drive around.”
October 2, 2012 at 11:31 am
Here’s one idea for a Tip/Shaft O’ the Day:
“After you’ve drained a six pack of PBR cans in short order, don’t throw away the plastic holder- with a little creative scissor work, you’ll be the proud owner of 6 upcycled cock rings! You’re welcome.”
October 2, 2012 at 11:56 am
Do include the warning that dick will make you slap some body
October 2, 2012 at 12:47 pm
It’s almost always someone who had it coming or wanted to have it coming.
October 2, 2012 at 12:48 pm
I mean “cuming”.
October 2, 2012 at 12:58 pm
with a full bush its “combing”
October 2, 2012 at 2:16 pm
I’d like to be in on “the rotation”, if you know what I mean. *wink*wink*
October 3, 2012 at 9:22 am
let me know when these are available and how much. Now I know what to get my brother for Christmas. He’s one of those difficult to buy for people.
October 2, 2012 at 7:01 pm
That does puzzle me. The ones I’ve bought are…smaller.
October 3, 2012 at 4:45 pm
Maybe that is why one of the listings is titled “snug as a bug in a rug.” it’s snug in your rug!
October 2, 2012 at 10:10 am
Something seems a little fishy…
October 2, 2012 at 10:14 am
I tried this and ended up getting horseshoe crabs.
October 2, 2012 at 12:28 pm
I bet getting sea squirts is even more awkward.
October 2, 2012 at 10:16 am
A sea sponge is a sea sponge.
A tampon is a tampon.
Never the twain shall meet.
Tis the circus of life!
October 2, 2012 at 10:17 am
I wonder if sneezing creates more of a spray or a stream effect?
October 2, 2012 at 10:17 am
Now where’s the seashell diaphragm and seaweed merkin?
October 2, 2012 at 11:57 am
I think this might be a starter kit for mermaids
October 2, 2012 at 10:17 am
What will dirty hippies think of next? I really don’t want details on the cleaning process. Don’t accidently leave that out on the bathroom sink unless you want to give the rest of the family nightmares. Some things don’t need to be “green”. Really.
October 2, 2012 at 5:32 pm
My favorite part is the fact that something died to make this. Sea sponges are animals, and part of some very delicate ecosystems. How “green” is that?
October 3, 2012 at 4:49 pm
hmmm….aquaculture vs. trees and cotton (one of the most heavily-sprayed crops in the world.) kind of a toss-up.
October 2, 2012 at 10:21 am
::Warning – history geek comment about to follow:: Women used to use sea sponges soaked in vinegar or lemon juice as birth control. Not much different than a Today Sponge actually. However, that doesn’t excuse the fact that some lunatic hippy is selling this crap on Etsy.
October 2, 2012 at 10:30 am
And the Egyptians used alligator dung crammed in their for birth control. How long do you think it will be before that’s on Etsy? I’m kind of surprised if it’s not already.
October 2, 2012 at 12:50 pm
I always wondered about the backstory to “Walk Like an Egyptian” the more you know
October 2, 2012 at 10:36 am
So wait, this can be used multi-purpose?
All you have to do is put it in at the start of your period, take it out at the end, rinse in vinegar, and put it back in to avoid pregnancy like some kind of vaginal contact lens?
October 2, 2012 at 12:43 pm
like some kind of vaginal contact lens
Read more at http://www.regretsy.com/2012/10/02/spongecrotch-redpants/#IEOQtMKdGkeK1cM5.99
Dear God I don’t ever want to hear that phrase again.
October 2, 2012 at 12:55 pm
I have special goggles I use for vaginal spelunking
October 2, 2012 at 10:21 am
I’m guessing that somewhere at the top of the “instruction pamphlet” there’s something about getting hammered first.
October 2, 2012 at 1:15 pm
“STOP! Hammer time!”
October 2, 2012 at 10:21 am
My wife says the Sponge Tampons are unnecessary since she got this…
October 2, 2012 at 10:26 am
The Tam How?
October 3, 2012 at 10:00 pm
Is it just me, or is the “Sham-Wow” dude creepy looking? He looks a bit of a perve…..
October 2, 2012 at 10:23 am
FINALLY: A tampon for those of us whose baginos are shaped like a Hoppity Horse.
October 2, 2012 at 10:28 am
Am I the only one that sees a face in that sponge? Specifically this face:
October 2, 2012 at 10:39 am
The one in the front looks like cock-n-balls to me. Cock-n-balls sponge to be shoved in your bajingo. Nice one, trollface.
October 2, 2012 at 11:57 am
After close examination, I’m not seeing it at all.
October 2, 2012 at 1:12 pm
I see teeth. Does anyone else see teeth?
October 2, 2012 at 10:30 am
….actually sea sponges make much much better “tampons” than tampons. No risk of TSS. Which involves so much more nastiness. You think this is gross? Try having all the skin on your extremities peel off
-Yay seasponges and cups says definitely-not-hippy!
October 2, 2012 at 11:28 am
Wow, that’s so interesting! Can you also tell us what kind of toilet paper you use, because I am on the edge of my seat over here.
October 2, 2012 at 11:39 am
There are countless ways to avoid TSS without cramming a sea creature in your box.
October 2, 2012 at 2:35 pm
Can this please go on a sampler? or in the Shaft of the day book?
October 2, 2012 at 12:00 pm
so a sea sponge makes you a happy hippy?! Could someone pass the kale
October 2, 2012 at 2:31 pm
I would, but I’m using it right now. You’ll get your kale in 5-7 days.
October 2, 2012 at 3:45 pm
it better not smell like used sea sponge
October 2, 2012 at 12:09 pm
Actually, there is still a risk of TSS. Anything you stick up there & keep up there can cause TSS: http://www.cdc.gov/mmwr/preview/mmwrhtml/00000119.htm
It might be a lower risk, but it’s still a risk.
October 2, 2012 at 12:31 pm
I’m not buying the “No risk of TSS.” argument. TSS happens when women leave their tampons in too long. Why wouldn’t leaving a sea sponge in for over eight hours have the same effect? Just because it’s from Mother Earth doesn’t mean it won’t hurt you.
BTW, TSS is so rare now the CDC doesn’t even bother to track it anymore.
October 2, 2012 at 2:31 pm
TSS is pretty rare now.
I’d buy the “it’s more comfortable” argument, though. So many things in the world are more “normal” but also more skin-irritating (for me, anyway.)
I’m still not sure I’d be comfortable crammin’ a sponge up there, though. Especially one packaged in a mason jar with a suspicious-looking bottle of “vinegar.”
October 2, 2012 at 7:05 pm
Don’t get me going on cups. I had a bad experience with cups.
(Have you ever been awakened in the dead of night by something moving rapidly inside your va-jay-jay, while sleeping alone? Never again with the cups.)
October 2, 2012 at 10:32 am
Should come with SpongeBob Tampons, as found in Bikini Bottoms…
October 2, 2012 at 10:37 am
“Sponges can last anywhere from 3-6 months”
I’m anywhere from 35-70 years old.
My car has anywhere from 2-4 tires on it.
You need anywhere from 1500-3000 calories a day.
You have anywhere from 15 to 30 years left to live.
Wouldn’t you want a more specific shelf life for the sea-sponge-tampon?
October 2, 2012 at 10:46 am
I don’t want a sea-sponge tampon, period.
(see what I did there?)
October 2, 2012 at 10:49 am
I sea it.
October 2, 2012 at 10:50 am
Yes, I saw that. Sometimes you just gotta go with flow.
October 2, 2012 at 10:51 am
*the flow
October 2, 2012 at 11:16 am
You almost got invited to kiss someone’s grits!
October 2, 2012 at 11:34 am
Yeah, that’s not what I menses to say.
October 2, 2012 at 12:28 pm
“A period is just a little dot, that occupies a very special spot”
from THE ELECTRIC COMPANY
this always used to make me and my sister giggle
October 2, 2012 at 11:44 am
This poor bastard lasted about 1 minute after he found out where he was going.
October 2, 2012 at 11:49 am
Oh, what a vagedy!
October 2, 2012 at 12:15 pm
“Stayfree or Die!”
October 2, 2012 at 12:26 pm
“We will Always remember him!”
October 2, 2012 at 5:22 pm
with wings!
October 2, 2012 at 10:38 am
Now that my uterus is surgical waste, somewhere, or ash in an incinerator, I’ll get pissed on my daughter’s behalf–
If ANYONE ever comes near her with a “menarche gift”, I’m going to gift them back. In the face. With my fist.
October 2, 2012 at 3:28 pm
So you won’t be throwing her a Red Tent party, then?
October 2, 2012 at 4:24 pm
I think a king-size bottle of advil, a pack of those chemical heat things you wear under your clothes, and a giant bag of M&M’s would make a good menarche gift.
October 2, 2012 at 4:44 pm
I think the best gift you can give someone for that is a box of Godivas, a hug, and a sincere “I’m sorry, hun.”
October 3, 2012 at 4:43 pm
Am I the only woman who CAN’T eat chocolate on my period? Makes my cramps 10x worse!
October 4, 2012 at 5:22 pm
what no ice-cream day or special celebratory “woman’s day” with Claire Huxtable? The other worst idea; the word “mensie.”
October 2, 2012 at 10:40 am
Y’know, I try to be open-minded and enthusiastic about trying new things, but I seriously draw the line at jamming dead sea creatures up my bits.
What the hell, people?
October 2, 2012 at 10:40 am
I’m now envisioning the used-but-not-yet-cleaned sponge as an applicator for some wombyn’s art project.
And now I need a stiff drink, STAT. I am much too sober to handle such visions.
October 2, 2012 at 1:15 pm
Heck, what about some retro wall-sponging? The dried color will be PERFECT for fall!
October 2, 2012 at 10:46 am
It’s about time somebody started doing something about this insane overabundance of yacht-scraping coral reefs! Now, if you ladies could find a place to cram barnacles, I wouldn’t mind atoll.
I’m the 1% and I endorse this message.
October 2, 2012 at 11:40 am
I saw the dog on the roof of your yacht and knew it was you.
October 2, 2012 at 12:17 pm
But that’s the poop deck!
October 2, 2012 at 12:59 pm
Exactly.
October 2, 2012 at 10:48 am
Does it make your lady bits smell of a fresh ocean breeze or a salad dressing?
October 2, 2012 at 10:52 am
From the Wikipedia article on sea sponges:
“Most sponges are hermaphrodites (function as both sexes simultaneously), although sponges have no gonads (reproductive organs). Sperm are produced by choanocytes or entire choanocyte chambers that sink into the mesohyl and form spermatic cysts”
You really want your daughter to be stuffing “spermatic cysts” all up in her business?
October 2, 2012 at 10:55 am
“Look at this stuff, isn’t it neat? This goes in my muff, til my cycle’s complete! Wouldn’t you say I’m a girl who has everything…”
October 2, 2012 at 10:25 pm
I love you.
October 2, 2012 at 11:02 am
Can someone tell me what the fuck this is even supposed to mean?!? First line from the listing:
“For those unwilling to soak their sponge in their oatmeal bowl.”
October 2, 2012 at 1:14 pm
Part of a balanced breakfast?
October 2, 2012 at 1:56 pm
Yes! I was wondering why that was left out – it’s perhaps the most insane part of the whole thing.
October 6, 2012 at 9:03 pm
It’s Quaker foreplay of course! And after, they all join hands and sing ‘Tis A Gift To Be Simply Carefree
October 2, 2012 at 11:06 am
This is not a real thing. This was mislabeled and should have been “etsy” or “regretsy”, right?
October 2, 2012 at 11:50 am
While the kit itself is a bit hippie-dippy and mockworthy, sea sponges make AWESOME menstrual products. They’re comfy, less likely to cause problems than tampons, nice and gentle to the bajingo – the environmentally-friendly thing is basically just a bonus.
October 4, 2012 at 5:25 pm
But I want to know, who the fuck looked at this sponge and thought, Gee, I’ll see if this thing works? Up it goes, a woman’s woes.
October 2, 2012 at 11:57 am
Here Is more…
http://www.etsy.com/listing/86263894/sea-sponges-menstrual-sponges-eco
October 3, 2012 at 10:08 pm
But they are RAD!!! O.o
October 4, 2012 at 5:27 pm
WHAT IS WRONG WITH THAT ‘Goddess”s’ss… ‘ LABIA?! Is that what happens when you use these?!
October 2, 2012 at 12:02 pm
“They can be trimmed for comfort!”
October 2, 2012 at 12:17 pm
Ironic, right?
October 2, 2012 at 1:09 pm
includes pattern for landing strip with wings. Doesn’t it always have to have wings?! Next years sea sponge will have wings
October 3, 2012 at 11:51 am
I think requesting a custom sponge would be more fun.
October 2, 2012 at 12:04 pm
It can’t be any worse than a dry wad of cotton.
I’m a Diva.
October 2, 2012 at 1:10 pm
I think that is one of Mariah Carey’s concert riders
October 2, 2012 at 1:45 pm
So am I. Best investment I made for my vagina since losing my virginity.
October 2, 2012 at 3:53 pm
http://www.uhpinions.com/diva-cup/
I’m a dude but this review (from Regretsy’s sister site, UH-pinions) had me almost peeing my pants in laughter.
October 2, 2012 at 6:58 pm
Yeah. That was more or less my experience with the Diva Cup. ‘Breaking the seal’ at removal involved shrieking in pain and the absolute conviction I was going to end up holding my uterus. Home hysterectomy!
October 2, 2012 at 12:17 pm
I don’t think the Mason jar will fit in my purse.
October 2, 2012 at 12:18 pm
“What’s that on your desk? Are you making tea?”
October 2, 2012 at 12:20 pm
I can use it to carry my tampons AND my moonshine!!!
October 2, 2012 at 1:02 pm
I suppose that’s one way to disinfect them…
October 2, 2012 at 1:02 pm
Tampons soaked in moonshine? So you could get drunk through your vajay and never fail a breathalyzer test! Genius! Drunk driving has never been so easy!
October 2, 2012 at 12:51 pm
“1 to 2 cleanings” in “3 to 6 months”? What happens the months you don’t clean it?
…wait, actually, I don’t want to know. :\
October 2, 2012 at 1:04 pm
You place it in an aquarium with a castle and pirate chest and sea monkeys spontaneously develop. Science makes it possible.
October 2, 2012 at 1:13 pm
The bubble apparatus airiates the sponge providing a sensation like washing your vagoo in Perrier
October 2, 2012 at 2:35 pm
That sounds like a very fun and educational vagina.
October 2, 2012 at 1:08 pm
You want me to put a sea sponge in my vagina? I won’t get crabs, will I?
October 2, 2012 at 1:21 pm
I want to be where the tampons go
I want see, want to see them sucking
All of that blood from that… what was it called?
UTERUSSSS!!!
Up when it cramps, up when it bleeds
Up where I’m sure I can dooo the deeeed!
Absorbing blood…
Wish I can be… IN YOUR VAGOOOOO!!!!!
I made that up on the spot…
October 2, 2012 at 1:27 pm
Every woman wants their cooch to smell like vinegar, right?
October 2, 2012 at 1:37 pm
OK, I think I’m missing something here (like my period; haven’t seen it since Jan 2010, WOOHOO!) but what the fuck is the BAG for? Do you cram the bag up in your snatch too?
I get the jar is for soaking in the vinegar (do you rinse out the vinegar? wouldn’t straight vinegar be TOO acidic for your hoohaw – who wants the walls of their vag to get chemical burns) but how do you use the bag? To soak it? To carry a wet sponge in your purse? To carry a used icky wet sponge back home in your purse? Why is it a cloth bag then? And wouldn’t the size of the smell give it away? Imagine sitting at your desk at work, with that lovely old blood smell wafting from your purse. Ewwwww.
October 2, 2012 at 2:42 pm
I can’t believe that the size of the smell was used **in context**. I can’t believe it. It just completes my day after seeing the two guys who meet on the street kiss spontaneously, singing Kurt Weil in german (I don’t speak german) with a choir of people in their sixties, finding a dartboard on the street and taking it home, and getting ready to pull a half-nighter working. Now I know that I can.
October 2, 2012 at 1:40 pm
And I was always in the Tsunami category as far as flow goes. ONE sponge a day is not going to cut it. I’d either be in the bathroom, rinsing out a sponge every hour and grossing the hell outta my coworkers (seriously, would you want to use the sink after someone did that?) or have like 8 of them sitting in my purse stinking up the place.
And if you don’t manage to squeeze it nearly dry, do you get water dripping down your leg afterward?
OK, I can see using these at home, but I can’t wrap my head around how to manage for an 8 hour work day, plus travel time.
October 2, 2012 at 7:09 pm
Never had a problem. Wrap it in a big wad of toilet paper and squeeze, and it’s fine. And they’re little enough that wringing the water out is no problem.
But if you flow really heavily, it might be an issue. I’m pregnant now, but if I wasn’t, I wouldn’t use these for teaching, because I just can’t get to the bathroom whenever I feel like it.
October 2, 2012 at 1:48 pm
Of all the “no-no-no”s inherent in this post, my first thought was: Any time there was a Mason jar involved, regret surely followed. Not sure if that makes me tragically hip, or humiliatingly hayseed. (Hint: it’s the second one)
October 2, 2012 at 2:07 pm
The cider inside her makes a biter grow snider.
October 2, 2012 at 2:33 pm
Crochet, man, I hadn’t realized you’d be SO merciless to us!
October 2, 2012 at 3:03 pm
I just had a traumatic flashback.
~cue dream sequence~
I’m in college and my 300lb RA knocks on my door and tells me she needs my help in her room. I thought her blinds fell down again so I happily followed her. She tells me she got a Today sponge (Anyone remember those? No? Google it.) stuck in her vag. Would I help her get it out? This is the same RA that allows all kinds of shenanigans and lends money to poor college fucks but HELLLLL NO am I gonna dig around in another girl’s vag for some sponge. I told her I was prone to fainting at the sight of body parts. (Yes, I pulled that out of my ass) I was off the hook.
~end dream sequence~
I started to like you Crochet for the brilliant View It In A Room but now that I have you to thank for tonight’s nightmare, I’d like to kick you in the shins. Bastard.
October 2, 2012 at 7:15 pm
I once lost an OB tampon up there. Those dumb little threads? Get lost.
And all those reassuring pamphlets for girls just starting to use tampons? “What if the string gets lost?” “Well, just gently pull it out with your fingers. Trust us. It’s no big deal.”
OBs are little. This one was in deep. The human hand does not fit up in there like that at that angle. Took me forty-five minutes to retrieve, and I am still relieved it wasn’t an ER visit.
October 2, 2012 at 7:15 pm
I once lost an OB tampon up there. Those dumb little threads? Get lost.
And all those reassuring pamphlets for girls just starting to use tampons? “What if the string gets lost?” “Well, just gently pull it out with your fingers. Trust us. It’s no big deal.”
OBs are little. This one was in deep. The human hand does not fit up in there like that at that angle. Took me forty-five minutes to retrieve, and I am still relieved it wasn’t an ER visit.
October 2, 2012 at 3:04 pm
For those of us who like to exit the stall with red fingers, wring out our bloody sponge in the movie theater sink, and tuck it back into our purses next to our chewing gum.
October 2, 2012 at 3:26 pm
Apple Cider Vinegar makes every woman a Tart.
October 6, 2012 at 9:09 pm
“Thanks Summer’s Eve! Now I’m not only fresh and confident, but I can choose to smell like a fresh, stormy sea, (but I wish that seagull would quit following me!)or an orchard at the end of the season! You really do make this tart grow fonder!”
October 2, 2012 at 5:11 pm
anybody who has time to rinse out blood soaked sponges to any kind of hygenic standard needs better things to do with their time. Seriously, thrush anyone????
October 2, 2012 at 6:56 pm
Is the sponge supposed to fit inside my….oh no no no no.
October 2, 2012 at 7:17 pm
all the brain bleach and vodka in the world cant make me unsee the mental images suggested here. thanks to all of you I may have to take up drinking. oh and this is #2 on my list of things to avoid buying from esty.
October 2, 2012 at 9:36 pm
I’m probably going to regret asking this, but what is #1?
October 4, 2012 at 1:49 pm
that would be food , never ever buy food from esty …
October 2, 2012 at 9:17 pm
Wow, the comments seem to gush forth when this topic comes around. It’s almost like everyone’s happy to see it, despite anny temporary awkwardness it causes. Maybe Regresty should just fit it in once a month or so.
October 2, 2012 at 11:22 pm
Perhaps every 28 days?
October 3, 2012 at 1:37 am
There are two things here; women would love to talk more about their issues-that-nobody-gets-why-they’d-have-to-face-in-the-first-place, and these are never talked about anywhere else. All forms of public discussion, expression and art happily ignore a world where at least one fourth of the population needs a couple of days medical leave per month.
Also, if you like this one then you’ll love the threads about giving birth.
October 3, 2012 at 11:13 am
Where can I find these threads, please, Ma’am? I SO want to share about how my 4th token of love smelled like a koala bear when she entered the outer world, cause I had been on a serious eukalyptus-oil-pill diet for months before delivery, due to an AB-resistant sinusitis which cost me part of my septum, btw. Oh and how the midwife and the turkish pedriatician jumped in horror, getting sprayed with blood after they told me to “get out the afterbirth fast, and in one piece, please” – which I did at once cause this made me laugh so hard that the placenta popped out and hit the floor 5 feet away, bursting in a gust of bloodshed…. AAAAh the pleasures of motherhood.
Someone please explain to me what is so disgusting about a little blood soaked sponge?
October 3, 2012 at 1:43 am
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
October 3, 2012 at 5:29 am
This might be because I was a giant gay man (who’s slightly traumatised by some of the comments here) but… How the hell is that supposed to fit in a vagina. And how do they get it out again?
October 4, 2012 at 5:33 pm
well, i’m guessing b/c it’s spongy…it squishes in… then you must have to send 2 fingers “up in there” to pinch a smidgen of it and tug. nice, right?
October 3, 2012 at 4:34 pm
I know this isn’t an overly witty comment, but:
No fucking way.
October 15, 2012 at 8:49 am
I’ll stick with cotton, thanks.
April 14, 2013 at 6:26 pm
CTFU!!! Hilarious and just NO!!