Man, that Compound-W is really not working for you, is it?
That’s almost the tiniest set of fake giggle-holes I’ve ever seen.
. . .almost? I’m curious as to the winner.
Miniature plastic hentai dolls at the porn store in Japan when I was stationed on Okinawa.
Ah, Japan…always the answer.
Also, giggle-holes! I am so using that one next time (if….) I get laid again
You can always use it with BOB.
Does that make BOB a giggle stick?
I wouldn’t mind getting a little nookie on the side. It doesn’t have to be custom – I’m easy.
So what happens when you order a “custom” vajay from this person? Do you have to send a picture of your own, or do you try to explain it with words, and the “artist” does a police-sketch of it based on how you described it?
Average height, medium-build, no tattoos or identifying marks.
(shows sketch): “Does it look like this?”
“YES! THAT’S THE VAGINA THAT STOLE MY WALLET!!”
And another crime solved thanks to Snatch Sketch®
Tonight on “Law&Order: Small Vaginas Unit”
I don’t think my groin has a “bad body part,” but there’s a reason we cover that up with clothing. I wouldn’t carry one of those tokens any more than I think mu husband would want to carry one around of a penis, glorifying masculinity. HUZZAH! We have genitals! Woo!
Well there are those guys who have balls on the back of their car. So maybe there’s a market for tiny vaginas.
now I want a Vagina I can stick on the back of my car
I wonder if that would make people more or less likely to tailgate you.
This is what happens when you let a stick of bubblegum go through the wash in your jeans pocket.
Or give Sculpy to an 8 year-old to make absesses on her Barbie dolls.
I guess it’s better than having a giant clay vulva.
did the decimal get placed too far to the right?
TWO FOR $150!
Since this person obviously lives in a fantasy world, can we pay her in Monopoly money?
Did you see her other offerings?
“The image is meant to be whimsical and mysterious while using low-tech art making methods. The artwork looks as though a furry monster has been sketched on an available surface. The cardboard had purposeful wrinkles and creases. Currently, there is no hanging hardware on the back so you can decide if you want to frame it, use velcro, a metal hanger or attach wire . . . I am a fine artist working in many media.”
Let’s be honest here. You made a sketch with markers on a crappy piece of cardboard probably from a random box you had lying around. THAT IS NOT FINE ART.
The writeup, on the other hand, is a sublime work of bullshittery.
I like the drawing. I’ll make you one like it on real paper for $10. (i’d say $5, but I’d have to go get the cool markers first.)
Her last name is Casebeer. Wanna guess where the cardboard, and the inspiration, came from?
Also: Performance art wherein she rakes a beach.
the one at the top looks like it’s sticking its tongue out at me. unhappy clam.
I debated the wisdom of doing this, but the idiot in me won the arguement. On behalf of my inner idiot, I apologize.
Your inner idiot is my new favorite idiot! Suck it, Michelle Bachmann.
oh, please, put it ON Michelle Bachmann!!!!!
I went and did that, but unfortunately, I had to go and use the one of her eating a hotdog… and I was halfway through making it and went “oh dear god no, this just wrong” and stopped.
I’m a bad person, aren’t I.
You are a bad person for not finishing it and posting it, yes.
You MUST finish it and post it. For science!
FINE. But this could be classed as porn and you’re responsible for the crushing weight of thumbs down I’ll be buried under.
I wish I could give that a thousand thumbs up.
i love you.
Carrot Top after a bad night or Jacqueline Stallone every night?
OMG! This is awesome. Just awesome. She almost looks like Tammy Faye Bakker.
And the makers of Fleshlight are going hmm….
Good idea – if they packaged them in groups of six they could sell them as complete pocket pool sets.
With the right piercing, those could be some of the most horrible ear rings ever!
If only they weren’t so expensive or I weren’t so cack-handed that I couldn’t produce a recognisable tiny clay vulva, that would so happen….
Cack-handed? Does that mean you’ve been handling too much cack?
Every doll house needs a tiny vagoo
A little double sided tape, and they’d make kick-ass pasties. “Hey everybody! Look at my vagina-nipples!”
I hadn’t realize they made sex toys for The Littles.
“Keep it in your pocket or in a special place”
Bedside drawer? Medicine cabinet? On top of the bookshelf? Hmmm, think, think. Where is a special place?
The bedside cabinet in the insane asylum seems an apt place
Right in front of the webcam for chatroulette.
But then I need to find a boobs version to go with it!
Inside your own gigglehole?
I’d be afraid it’d get stuck, resulting in a discussion with the ER Doctor that I’d really just as soon not have.
on a Vaga-sil
Is that a suggested placement site, or a new euphemism?
I suspect artist that focus on “themes of social taboo” are actually working out their own issues. Much as institutionalized folk do with fingerpaints or with their own excrement on the wall.
. . .why is that one sticking its tongue out at me?
And seriously, this whole ‘women should seek definition and self-worth in nothing but their genitals’ crap needs to stop. I don’t care who’s doing it; just fuck off. It’s not cute when the anti-choice crowd reduces women to bipedal incubators, and the flip side of that, with the ~MajyKalGoddeSSMoonWoMb~ crowd reducing women to a vulva or a menstrual cycle, is also not cute. I am so goddamn much more than my reproductive organs. So is every woman.
Now, care to repeat that for the nutcases? No, it won’t help, will it? …crap.
cute is not what they aim for.
True. I have a spleen. I love my spleen. WHERE’S MY LITTLE CLAY SPLEEN?
She wore threeeeeeee vulvas
(ooo wah ooo)
More clay vulvas than was right
Tiny clay vulvas seemsso tight…
Heck of a thing to drop out of your pocket when you’re getting out your keys/change/whatever. Should make the kiddies eyes go big.
Meanwhile, I don’t have “good” or “bad” body parts. Some might be more fun than others, but I don’t judge them.
Ah! The one at the top is totally blowing a raspberry. Can one of you talented folks give it googly eyes and animate it?
I… I love you.
I love the first part of your screen name and will likely be using it in the future in a fit of road rage. Thanks for this.
Thank you because you saved me the bother of doing this. It really needed to be done.
Thank you I just cant seem to get the whole image thing correct
Does anyone else look at the bottom one and hear, “Yuuuuuuup, yup yup yupyupyupyup yup” like those muppets?
Which Muppets look like little vaginas to YOU?
Correction: Vulvas. My mind went to a very dark place for a moment and Muppets were lurking in the shadows.
HOLY HANDGRENADES I WON!
Well played and you are Crochets first COTD!
“non threatening token”
oh also 100$.
They look like they should be sugar coated and swimming in a bowl of milk.
Vun! Two! Threeee! Three tiny pooosies! Ah AH AAAHHH!
It’s not as fancy as April’s ‘Comment of the Day’, but you are hereby awarded my “Giggled Aloud-Comment of the Day” !
I’d like to thank The Academy…
This! I think I may have wet myself laughing. Dammit.
You can always depend on me, but perhaps you should Depend® on you.
Aren’t sugar puffs like that already?
Yes, and they make wee smell all sickly sugary. Diabetes in the making eating those things.
Ew… my man eats… “Red River Cereal” (multigrain porridge) That doesn’t even require any modification to be nasty.
I prefer Weetabix, so…
Ooh, I’ve had Weetabix. It goes limp as soon as the milk pours out…of the container.
[Insert varied and sundry sexual euphemisms here.]
Okay, since we’re going there:
Honey Nut Busters
and of course the one that doesn’t need modifying:
Oh, shit, you guys, I had a mouthful of cracker and hummus when I read this. It was so hard not to spit it out on my laptop.
Cunt Chocula was the best.
You know what they say –
Once you’ve gone Chocula
All you’ll ever want is badonkadonkula.
So the “crunch” is referring to what, crabs?
Cap ‘n Crotch.
Also, I’m pretty sure that one bleary morning, I’d mistake these for coffee beans, leading to a terrible grinder accident.
Just in time for Halloween. They’re pretty much the exact same thing as those stick-on “scars” they sell for costumes, and those things are like $2.00.
How would people know you have a vagina if you don’t have it on display every where you go?? How many times have we all been in this situation.. “I have a vagina!” “prove it, I say!”. I know it happens to me quite often. Now, with my handy little mini clay vagina I can display it proudly; avoiding these awkward situations, once and for all!
Is this the female equivalent of a codpiece?
$100 for one vulva? Well, that scraps my idea of buying a bag and handing them out for Halloween treats.
Pretty sad that a hooker with a real vulva (or at least marginally decent surgical version) is cheaper these days, ain’t it?
Yeah, I really don’t understand that target market at all. I mean, I’m pretty damn feminist, but I REALLY don’t need a bracelet charm of somebody’s boy-howdy. Thanks though.
I’m loving all the different, new-to-me euphemisms popping up all over this post.
Jeebus, that one on the bottom right looks infected. Can you put antibiotics on your wombyn parts?
I already have a cooter in my pants, so don’t need a reminder that I have one. At least mine has stopped all that magickal bleeding every month, although the homicidal rages and hot flashes ain’t no picnic either.
I want to buy one and stick it in my belly-button, and then chase my boyfriend around the room with it. No reason.
Is a reason even needed? I think not.
I feel sick.
I am all for feminism but surely ladies did not throw themselves in front of racehorses for this?
Please no. That is just gross. There is no excuse.
Do you send her a photo of your minge, or does she come round to your house and study it?….
I’m not sure if it is art or a flash back to a very bad trip in 2004. If those things start talking about the difference between gravity in the standard model versus gravity as predicted by general relativity, I’ll know for sure.
I’d like to see it photoshopped into the goatse icon. That’d be the place to store mah ‘special body parts’.
Hey, think she’d make little clay necrotic toes too? Those are generally considered bad, and why should someone be ashamed of gangrene? Or tumors? Stop body shaming once and for all, with clay reproductions of…crap.
Imma go search Etsy for anus sculptures. Poor anuses, always treated like they’re unattractive!
Sorry I’m too dumb to give ya the actual image.
The blurb (it’s anus earrings btw) isn’t all empowering and shit though; the creator knows they’re jokey earrings and isn’t making a statement with them. I’m sad there’s no cupcake movement to destigmatize having a pooper. Anus is really much more in need of positive PR than gash, by like, a million times.
“Don’t push too far
You’re dreams are vaginas in your hand”
Oh my God, those are…
is that one looking at me???
OHMYGOD IT WINKED!
Has anyone seen Nightmare On Elm Street 3 (yeah, the dream warriors one)? This looks like the junkie girl’s arm-mouths.
These things kind of look like hors d ‘oeuvres or however you spell it.
I think it’s spelled “Leprosy”.
wait… i’m confused about the “western values”. If we, in the US, are the Westerners… is she saying the Eastern-ers, like China, are perfectly happy to show the noni at all times? Has she ever met anyone from the “East”? A vast amount of girls, at least, cover their mouths when they smile or talk because they are self conscious! Not all! Just something I noticed.
Well, she is also assuming that feminist =/= shy so I don’t think she is too big on logic.
That was my “Say whaaa?” moment in the post: “shy”
PERFECT gift for a shy friend.
Not to defend this product, but when people specify “Westerners” or “Americans” or whatever, usually it’s just to refer to the scope of your claim. I can say that Western culture is scared of pussy, and that doesn’t assert that African cultures aren’t scared of gash, it just means, I don’t know anything about their relationship to bayina, or at least, I’m leaving that relationship out of this discussion. They’re just limiting the scope of their claim, and that’s actually surprisingly smart.
I think this would make a much better old wives tale about the dangers of masturbation.
Sorry, but that’s a terrible way to discourage masturbation. “If you masturbate, vaginas will grow on your hand. Tiny, tight little vaginas. That can’t say no.”
Or your vagina will shrink and become Barbie-doll size if you masturbate too much?
Point taken, I didn’t think about using it on women. I always thought the “hair on the palm of your hands” thing refered to the fact that most guys use their palm. As a chick, I’ve never used that part of my hand.
When Shaggy opened the door to the Funhouse, small vaginas floated into the air and began chasing him. “Ruh roh” yelled Scooby as they both ran for it.
They cannoned into Velma. “Velma! Sm-sm-small vaginas, chasing us!” yelled Shaggy. “H-h-h-help!”
Also, my warts don’t talk to me.
I would SO buy one of those and wear it around my neck if it increased my chances of getting pregnant!
I need to get some of these and stick them on my daughter’s Barbie Dolls. It would lead easily into The Big Talk. The problem is what do I do about Ken? Do you think this Artist would make some Ken appendages if I asked nicely?
That bottom one just makes me think of Sam the Sheepdog.
Those would make a nice set up buttons for one of those stoopid giant knit cowls that aare so all the rage on Etsy. In mustard colored yarn. Or maybe gray.
(Apologies to anybody who likes to wear stoopid giant knit cowls)
It’s been done before, and in the 70s: Hannah Wilke’s 1974 S.O.S — Starification Object Series “in which she merged her minimalist sculpture and her own body by creating tiny vulval sculptures out of chewing gum and sticking them to herself.” http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hannah_Wilke
These are perfect for sticking on my barbies, or sewing to dolls.
I mean, in case I wanted to get creepy.
Because all shy people secretly long for a tiny pocket bajingo
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