Honey, scads of them have never heard of Dick Clark, and he’s only been dead a little while now. How the hell would you expect ‘em to know about Mama Cass??
And I need to state that it’s urban legend that Cass Elliott died from choking on a ham sandwich. It was the comment by some ass that “she probably choked on a ham sandwich,” that started that.
And I’m starting anything here. I’m a fan of Snopes and I love to dispel myths and legends.
Oh shit, you just turned Regretsy into a learning experience. It’s ruined – RUINED, I say! Seriously, I had heard the ham sammich thing and believed it all these years, and I’m old enough to remember her death. Thanks for clearing that one up.
I looked at it sideways and straight on and at best I’m hoping it’s a Pikachu inside out. That has some appeal. Basically, if something is going to look dead, it is really essential that I know what it looked like alive.
Also, this is a real conversation piece. You can invite your friends to speculate about what species it was before you flensed the skin off of it, prompting conversation. Then your friends can discuss whether you’ve gone off your medication again and if you need to be involuntarily committed, prompting more conversations. It might even lead to an intervention, which, when you think about it, is really just a fancy, grumpy conversation.
Does your chewing gum lose its flavour
On the bedpost overnight?
If your mother says don’t chew it
Do you swallow it in spite?
Can you catch it on your tonsils
Can you heave it left and right?
Does your chewing gum lose its flavour
On the bedpost overnight?
You are my hero! I used to have a tape (yes, a cassette tape) called Goofy Gold that contained such gems at that little ditty and the ever popular “Tie Me Kangaroo Down”
I remember going to my friend Cindy’s house one time and she played that song Tie Me Kangaroo Down over and over and over. I was probably like 8 or 9 and I thought it was the most depressing song I’d ever heard. I think it might have been Goofy Gold, actually, but it was a record. She had one of those “portable” record players. You know, the ones with a handle, but there was no possible way you could “port” the thing with the handle?
I always thought “My Grandfather’s Clock” was the most depressing song I ever heard. Even if it WAS on the same album as John Pertwee singing “Three Little Fishies”.
“Tie Me Kangaroo Down” is no good without the wobble board, though.
I think that was the joke (took me a bit to get it). People label things with whatever the most recent tragedy is, whether the item is relevant or not. Still, I think it’s too soon. Massacres take more time to joke about than deaths of individual celebrities.
Looking at this, I pictured someone trying to sculpt a small lame dog scarred by fire on 90 percent of its body, holding onto a rope for dear life by its teeth because that was the only thing pulling it out of the fire. I’m…not sure they were successful. Or should have wanted to succeed, for that matter.
If you don’t ever have this in your mouth and spit it out to hang around your neck and then say “What? I’m going for a world record!” just as someone serves you food, you aren’t realizing its full potential.
The craftards shop description is “home decor murderers” and I have no doubt that something was murdered to make this, perhaps a pinky mouse or a vole….
I looked at this and saw some kind of winged otter fetus.
I’ve illustrated it for your viewing pleasure, I chose pale cyan as the colour as I thought it would look striking against the fleshiness of the object in question.
Her description: “This beautiful necklace will make people wonder whether you’re wearing some sort of alien wire-wrap or intestinal discharge around your neck.”
The description is quite accurate, if you take out “beautiful”, “will make people wonder whether”, “some sort of alien wire wrap” and replace them with “revolting”, “will make people nauseated”, and “some sort of cat crap”.
The “intestinal discharge” part is 100% accurate. Kudos on that.
Oh lord, not another anti-fifth genner. I’ve played since the first gen myself (I was 9ish). Remember Grimer/Muk?
Inanimate objects? How about Voltorb/Electrode? Magnemite/Magneton?
The art style HAS changed (I’m not a fan of most of the new ones personally, but that’s purely opinion based), however the “originality” has not. Every gen has pokemon based on animals, mythology, plants, humans, and inanimate objects.
also, just another thing. There’s a quote going around the pokemon fandom. “Pokemon players never “hate” generations. You have your favorite and least favorite.”
Gen II is my fav, V is the least. That doesn’t make me anti-anything. I love fashion. That doesn’t mean I have to like every outfit ever made. It also doesn’t mean I hate every outfit made.
Uterine discharge on a string with button….is this what Drew Carey was describing with “living in sin with a safety pin”? Cleveland does not rock, my friend, Cleveland does not rock.
July 20, 2012 at 1:31 pm
Pikachewed.
July 20, 2012 at 3:22 pm
Pukeman
July 20, 2012 at 1:31 pm
The pikachu sheet really makes this one.
July 20, 2012 at 1:56 pm
Staging your photos correctly is crucial. She nailed it.
July 20, 2012 at 3:17 pm
No, it looks more like she silly puttied it.
July 20, 2012 at 4:22 pm
I think it’s a t-shirt. Does that make it better or worse?
July 20, 2012 at 4:33 pm
If that’s a t-shirt, does that mean the wide lump at the top is the uniboob?
July 20, 2012 at 6:35 pm
(Wait… I thought you were Honeyflake…)
July 20, 2012 at 1:33 pm
From Cass Elliott’s posthumous jewelry line.
July 20, 2012 at 1:38 pm
And you get an extra point there for confusing the kids of today, who’ve never even heard of Mama Cass.
July 20, 2012 at 1:39 pm
Seriously?!? Dear god, I’m old.
July 20, 2012 at 1:46 pm
Honey, scads of them have never heard of Dick Clark, and he’s only been dead a little while now. How the hell would you expect ‘em to know about Mama Cass??
July 20, 2012 at 1:55 pm
And I need to state that it’s urban legend that Cass Elliott died from choking on a ham sandwich. It was the comment by some ass that “she probably choked on a ham sandwich,” that started that.
And I’m starting anything here. I’m a fan of Snopes and I love to dispel myths and legends.
July 20, 2012 at 2:00 pm
NOT starting anything here.
July 20, 2012 at 2:02 pm
Adam, Jamie, Kari, Tory, Grant, and now, Mugsy! Let’s blow some shit up!
July 20, 2012 at 2:59 pm
Zippy I wish I could give you more thumbs up
July 20, 2012 at 3:47 pm
Oh shit, you just turned Regretsy into a learning experience. It’s ruined – RUINED, I say! Seriously, I had heard the ham sammich thing and believed it all these years, and I’m old enough to remember her death. Thanks for clearing that one up.
July 21, 2012 at 8:23 am
That ham sandwich story was just a cruel, vicious rumor.
It was roast beef.
July 20, 2012 at 3:02 pm
*sings* “Stars shinin’ up above me…” *cough* *cough* *haaaaack* “Oh. Looky there, somethin’ to wear around my neck!”
July 20, 2012 at 3:15 pm
“Sock it to me , sock it to me, sock it to me!”
July 20, 2012 at 2:28 pm
I may be young, but at least I know who she is, thank god I grew up in Eugene, OR. Hippies love Mama Cass.
July 20, 2012 at 1:42 pm
And no one’s wearing a necklace made of chewed-up fat ‘cept Mama Cass
July 20, 2012 at 1:33 pm
It looks like someone amputated, then skinned some sad small animal and hung it below the button.
July 20, 2012 at 2:05 pm
…or like someone mutilated, then barbecued Barbie parts.
July 20, 2012 at 1:35 pm
That is some sad looking little fetus, there.
July 20, 2012 at 1:57 pm
Now I wish there was a “Click Here to View It in a Womb” option.
July 20, 2012 at 2:10 pm
Sad?
I’d say it’s as cute as a button.
July 20, 2012 at 2:21 pm
They mean the thing to the left of the button.
July 20, 2012 at 2:44 pm
I don’t know what this thing is but it makes me ponder Benjamin Button and Freddy Krueger having a baby.
July 20, 2012 at 1:35 pm
Not gonna lie, I saw the pikachu background before I saw the title, and read it as “Grimer Polymer Pendant.”
July 20, 2012 at 1:35 pm
Saw this a few days ago, and it’s just too perfect for this post: http://imgur.com/gallery/WhTam
July 20, 2012 at 1:36 pm
Whoops, thought it was “grimer” just like Hello Happy.
July 20, 2012 at 1:35 pm
I looked at it sideways and straight on and at best I’m hoping it’s a Pikachu inside out. That has some appeal. Basically, if something is going to look dead, it is really essential that I know what it looked like alive.
July 20, 2012 at 1:36 pm
Also, this is a real conversation piece. You can invite your friends to speculate about what species it was before you flensed the skin off of it, prompting conversation. Then your friends can discuss whether you’ve gone off your medication again and if you need to be involuntarily committed, prompting more conversations. It might even lead to an intervention, which, when you think about it, is really just a fancy, grumpy conversation.
July 20, 2012 at 1:40 pm
Sometimes they’re even catered.
July 20, 2012 at 1:41 pm
A catered intervention? I’ve never been to one of those. You must have classier friends than I do.
July 20, 2012 at 1:44 pm
No, they just like to bitch longer at a sitting, but hate missing meals to do so.
July 20, 2012 at 2:55 pm
i fucking love you.
July 20, 2012 at 1:37 pm
When I was a kid, I used to chew gum up until bed time. I would then take my gum and put it on my bed post.
I’m pretty sure this person went back in time and stole my mouth magic.
July 20, 2012 at 1:41 pm
Really? Can I ask you a question, then?
Does your chewing gum lose its flavour
On the bedpost overnight?
If your mother says don’t chew it
Do you swallow it in spite?
Can you catch it on your tonsils
Can you heave it left and right?
Does your chewing gum lose its flavour
On the bedpost overnight?
July 20, 2012 at 3:17 pm
“computer says NO!”
July 20, 2012 at 5:59 pm
You are my hero! I used to have a tape (yes, a cassette tape) called Goofy Gold that contained such gems at that little ditty and the ever popular “Tie Me Kangaroo Down”
July 20, 2012 at 9:31 pm
I remember going to my friend Cindy’s house one time and she played that song Tie Me Kangaroo Down over and over and over. I was probably like 8 or 9 and I thought it was the most depressing song I’d ever heard. I think it might have been Goofy Gold, actually, but it was a record. She had one of those “portable” record players. You know, the ones with a handle, but there was no possible way you could “port” the thing with the handle?
July 22, 2012 at 8:33 pm
I always thought “My Grandfather’s Clock” was the most depressing song I ever heard. Even if it WAS on the same album as John Pertwee singing “Three Little Fishies”.
“Tie Me Kangaroo Down” is no good without the wobble board, though.
July 22, 2012 at 7:14 pm
Weird. That’s literally the second time today I’ve heard/read the words “tie me kangaroo down”. Synchronicity man.
Or a kangaroo fetish.
July 20, 2012 at 6:23 pm
oh my fucking god. I grew up with my dad playing this Irish Rovers album CONSTANTLY:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KBmW37ZJlso
and my mom played Mama Cass…shit my folks didn’t look like hippies. They also loved the Smothers Brothers.
July 20, 2012 at 1:37 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
July 20, 2012 at 1:41 pm
Maybe a bit.
July 20, 2012 at 1:44 pm
Give it about an hour and try again.
July 20, 2012 at 1:47 pm
Yeah, takes a bit for the glue gun to cool off and the glitter to dry.
July 20, 2012 at 2:10 pm
Well aside from being too soon, it just doesn’t make any damn sense.
July 20, 2012 at 10:25 pm
I think that was the joke (took me a bit to get it). People label things with whatever the most recent tragedy is, whether the item is relevant or not. Still, I think it’s too soon. Massacres take more time to joke about than deaths of individual celebrities.
July 20, 2012 at 1:37 pm
Is that a wad of Big League Chew?
July 20, 2012 at 4:19 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
July 20, 2012 at 9:34 pm
Ooooh, I remember Big League Chew. Memories…
July 20, 2012 at 1:39 pm
the button accent is what really pulls the whole piece together.
July 20, 2012 at 1:41 pm
Yeah, it really ties in, thematically. Without the button, it would just be stupid.
July 20, 2012 at 2:30 pm
I’m more interested in what’s going to pull it apart.
July 20, 2012 at 2:45 pm
And what will fall out…
July 20, 2012 at 3:04 pm
Really? I thought it was the cheap yellow embroidery floss? I guess I just don’t know anything about design….
July 20, 2012 at 1:40 pm
Looking at this, I pictured someone trying to sculpt a small lame dog scarred by fire on 90 percent of its body, holding onto a rope for dear life by its teeth because that was the only thing pulling it out of the fire. I’m…not sure they were successful. Or should have wanted to succeed, for that matter.
July 20, 2012 at 1:43 pm
You live in an.. call it “interesting” world, my friend. Somewhat disturbing, but interesting, at least on a clinical level.
July 20, 2012 at 2:00 pm
The New England Journal of Medicine would probably call it “interesting” as well.
July 20, 2012 at 1:41 pm
My dog barfed that up just the other day.
July 20, 2012 at 1:42 pm
“This beautiful necklace will make people wonder whether you’re wearing some sort of alien wire-wrap or intestinal discharge around your neck.”
intestinal discharge? isn’t that…basically…poop?
July 20, 2012 at 1:58 pm
If that comes out of you and you haven’t recently chewed and swallowed a pack of Bazooka Joe recently, it’s time to visit the ER.
July 20, 2012 at 3:20 pm
Gall stones and placenta should be disposed of once removed – not made into jewelry!!
July 20, 2012 at 3:41 pm
Stretch – I’m surprised at you. You’ve been here before. You know what a “craft supply” is.
July 20, 2012 at 1:43 pm
That is, without a doubt, the laziest polymer clay project I have ever seen.
July 20, 2012 at 1:47 pm
You know how hard you have to try to make $10 seem expensive?
July 20, 2012 at 1:52 pm
$10 is quite a wad for such a – wad.
July 20, 2012 at 2:00 pm
Too rich for my blood.
July 20, 2012 at 1:46 pm
This is what happens after my cat eats the yarn I use to crochet my whimsicle skants.
July 20, 2012 at 2:05 pm
Every cat’s an art critic.
July 20, 2012 at 1:51 pm
Oh April, I doubt you could have something that big stuck between your delicate, well-formed pearly whites. ACTIVATE GARY BUSEY PICTURE!
July 20, 2012 at 1:52 pm
Yo mama so ugly they have to tie a porkchop around her neck to get the dog to play with her.
July 20, 2012 at 1:58 pm
*sings* “Stars shinin’ up above me…” *cough* *cough* *haaaaack* “Oh. Looky there, somethin’ to wear around my neck!”
July 20, 2012 at 2:02 pm
Looks like an ABC necklace. Already been chewed.
July 20, 2012 at 2:02 pm
It’s like a left over my cat George the Giant Bunny Killer would leave just out of reach of the dog. Left hind quarter I would say.
July 20, 2012 at 8:05 pm
For some reason I have to know if your cat is giant, or if he kills giant bunnies. (Or both?)
July 20, 2012 at 2:07 pm
This is the kind of thing you wear if you want people to think you’re dating the Toxic Avenger.
July 20, 2012 at 2:12 pm
One of my cats produced this yesterday sans button.
July 20, 2012 at 2:19 pm
If you don’t ever have this in your mouth and spit it out to hang around your neck and then say “What? I’m going for a world record!” just as someone serves you food, you aren’t realizing its full potential.
July 20, 2012 at 3:03 pm
Pikapooed.
July 20, 2012 at 3:12 pm
The craftards shop description is “home decor murderers” and I have no doubt that something was murdered to make this, perhaps a pinky mouse or a vole….
July 20, 2012 at 3:47 pm
Decency, style and good taste
July 20, 2012 at 3:35 pm
You know your product and/or photography skills suck when the buyer would rather buy what is in the background as opposed to your turd on a string.
July 20, 2012 at 3:40 pm
Nothing could make a wad of chewed steak stuck to a piece of yellow dental floss and an inexplicable bright cherry-red button any less appetizing…
Except titling it with the word “grimy”.
July 20, 2012 at 4:10 pm
Why can’t they ever get out of the pool before they do stuff like that?
July 20, 2012 at 3:58 pm
I looked at this and saw some kind of winged otter fetus.
I’ve illustrated it for your viewing pleasure, I chose pale cyan as the colour as I thought it would look striking against the fleshiness of the object in question.
July 20, 2012 at 4:44 pm
That’s a good start, but couldn’t you have covered the whole thing with cyan?
Seriously, someone really needs to photoshop one of those series “What Your Winged Otter Baby Looks Like at X Weeks”.
July 20, 2012 at 4:06 pm
Her description: “This beautiful necklace will make people wonder whether you’re wearing some sort of alien wire-wrap or intestinal discharge around your neck.”
The description is quite accurate, if you take out “beautiful”, “will make people wonder whether”, “some sort of alien wire wrap” and replace them with “revolting”, “will make people nauseated”, and “some sort of cat crap”.
The “intestinal discharge” part is 100% accurate. Kudos on that.
Wtf is “alien wire-wrap”?
July 20, 2012 at 4:11 pm
This thing kinda looks like the new BK pulled pork sandwich (which is nasty BTW).
July 20, 2012 at 4:51 pm
I’ve spent several minutes looking at it and I still can’t find the carved out penis and giant vagina.
July 20, 2012 at 4:52 pm
Who thinks “grimy” is a selling point?
Is this the next “charmingly rusted” or “with aged patina”?
July 20, 2012 at 4:59 pm
If this thing is supposed to be a new Pokemon, i’m not surprised, lol.
But speaking of weird things…being a generation I-III fan I was shocked when I saw all the newer ones (fridge pokemon, ice cream pokemon).
One Pokemon is literally made out of trash.
(Actually, this thing could be Regretsy’s mascot considering how much upcycled stuff we find
)
July 20, 2012 at 8:36 pm
Oh lord, not another anti-fifth genner. I’ve played since the first gen myself (I was 9ish). Remember Grimer/Muk?
Inanimate objects? How about Voltorb/Electrode? Magnemite/Magneton?
The art style HAS changed (I’m not a fan of most of the new ones personally, but that’s purely opinion based), however the “originality” has not. Every gen has pokemon based on animals, mythology, plants, humans, and inanimate objects.
/rant
July 21, 2012 at 9:21 pm
Woah, hey now! Haha. I don’t hate fifth gens. I was just making a joke! XD Haha. I actually think some are cute. Not all are bad.
Also, you night be new to Regretsy. Here we make fun of lots of things. Ourselves included.
July 21, 2012 at 9:31 pm
also, just another thing. There’s a quote going around the pokemon fandom. “Pokemon players never “hate” generations. You have your favorite and least favorite.”
Gen II is my fav, V is the least. That doesn’t make me anti-anything. I love fashion. That doesn’t mean I have to like every outfit ever made. It also doesn’t mean I hate every outfit made.
July 20, 2012 at 8:31 pm
This pendant is actually so awful that I failed to notice the gaudy Pikachu shirt until the second time I scrolled past it.
July 20, 2012 at 8:50 pm
I’ve been here too long…all I see is melted penis.
July 21, 2012 at 2:21 am
This looks like something I dug out of my teeth after I had ribs.
Okay, now I must have you.
July 21, 2012 at 6:53 am
Uterine discharge on a string with button….is this what Drew Carey was describing with “living in sin with a safety pin”? Cleveland does not rock, my friend, Cleveland does not rock.
July 21, 2012 at 7:13 am
Grimy? Really?