This post first appeared on Regretsy on June 16, 2011.
Sorry, I already bought it.
But these are still available!
The First Family
William and Kate
Time to put in my custom order: Helen on the half-shell.
Two and a Half-shell Men.
My favorite by far. Nobody can resist an innuendo about putting pearls in shells :3
I think I might be able to. I’m definately going to try, anyway.
The creative excellence of the spelling is delightful.
Those read like a collection of REALLY BAD pick up lines.
I would love to cover your pearl in my “Shell”
WHAT DO THE PARENTHESES IMPLY?!
WHAT DO THE QUOTATIONS IMPLY?!
The owner of this shop is Tommy Lee Jones. I am picturing him agonizing over each of these treasures only to leave them rife with misspellings anyway.
I like the shop announcement: Please let me tell you how to get
one oyster shell picture frame did for ( Free.) I also have ( Important Information ) for you…
I wonder what the catch is…..
Goat, I agree with you. I also love this one: http://www.etsy.com/listing/77144140/oyster-shell-painted-head?ref=v1_other_2
I want one of the Virgin Mary, in blue.
Tragicrafting at its finest. There’s also a Saddam Hussein shell, one for Whitney Houston, and two of Michael Jackson in the shop. Stay classy, etsy!
O SWEET JESUS, I JUST BOUGHT THE SADDAM HUSSEIN! I think my dad will be thrilled!
Wow for a 9 and a half year old that guy had a magnificent beard.
I’m loving the warm rush of the breeze on memory lane, but I feel there’s something I don’t know. Why so many flashbacks? Are you on a trip? Is this flashback month? Surgery? The drugs that come after surgery?
It’s the drugs isn’t it?
Also if you are going through painful stuff I hope you get better. With out a leader the L in FJL’s will become more apparent and nobody needs that.
Heyyyy… I resemble that remark.
Now I know what kind of a noise annoys an oyster. The noise of laboured breathing and of a felt marker being uncapped.
Too bad there isn’t one with Joan Baez as the girl on the half-shell. An opportunity is being missed here.
She’m am dead now, too?
Well I’ll be damned, here comes your ghost again!
i ordered one of these for my husband for our anniversary earlier this year. have to say i was actually somewhat disappointed that mine didn’t have a poorly handwritten message on it. my message was printed on a decal similar to the one used for the photo. it’s still awesome, just not the same somehow…
i’m AM DEAd, YOU GUIzE!
It’s the perfect platter to serve pickled eggs! Once they are all eaten, it will remind that will will be gassy as hell!! Kill two birds, one stone.
Photograph of Jesus…
Photograph. Of. Jesus.
Also, why is he balding when he should be at most 33? I’m starting to think that might not be a genuine picture of Jesus!
I was wondering that myself. According to the Bible, he was 30 when he started his ministry and 33 when he was crucified. Unless The Holy Spirit suffered from male pattern baldness, I DON’T think that’s an actual picture of Jesus.
Perhaps it’s a picture of her cousin Mike, the 50+ year old hippie?
While it is true that Jesus died at 33, it’s actually a little known fact that he was Klingon, as can be clearly seen in that picture.
Tommy Lee Jones is the store owner? If this is his fall back plan then it’s no wonder they did another Men in Black movie.
and this Osama one is sublime because Muslims cannot eat seafood, shellfish are not Halal
Nothing says unique, one-of-a-kind family heirloom like sharpie on the mother of pearls the oyster shell.
Does the stand come with it? That could easily be a $2-3 stand right there… Otherwise I can go down to Golden Corral on seafood night and come home to make my own…
Huh. I thought Michael died from Propofol, not a massive T2-style gunshot wound to the head. But I was pretty stoned when CNN came on.
HOW IS THIS AMAZING PIECE STILL FOR SALE
If’d he’d named it “Amy Winehouse’s Last Stand” I’da bought that mofo.
If the Owner would be so kind, I would like to circumcise my first-born son with the jagged edge of that Uncle Bin Laden oyster shell.
My first-born is in his teens now, so that makes the logistics somewhat challenging, but in the end he’ll thank me.
I’ll bleach the stains off before returning. Convo me.
Naah the circumcision blood probably increases the value. You just need to claim that A.) it is artistic, B.) that it has healing powers, and C.) mention some made-up pagan god in your description. Blood could increase the value 10-fold!
This thing never fails to crack me up.
I’m pretty much forever jealous that HK owns it and I don’t.
This guy’s talent is literally improving with each piece; his spelling on this shell is actually correct! http://www.etsy.com/listing/76435988/bin-laden-dead-on-a-oyster-shell
His punctuation is another matter, but I think that can be forgiven, considering the artistic effort he puts into each piece demands most of his concentration.
I never thought a blog post would change my life. I am now the proud owner of the “think about it monkey,” the “i’m watching you hawk,” and the “I’m am dead bin laden” oysters. I cannot wait until they arrive!
Thank you, HK.
When ordering do you think I’d be able to specify I want the Willam and Kate version? I can only assume it’s the prototype and the poor chap learnt from his mistake?
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