Mollusk at Ground Zero
This post first appeared on Regretsy on June 16, 2011.
Sorry, I already bought it.
But these are still available!
42 comments on Mollusk at Ground Zero
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This post first appeared on Regretsy on June 16, 2011.
Sorry, I already bought it.
But these are still available!
You must be logged in to post a comment.
July 7, 2012 at 1:32 pm
Time to put in my custom order: Helen on the half-shell.
July 7, 2012 at 3:04 pm
Two and a Half-shell Men.
July 7, 2012 at 1:36 pm
http://www.etsy.com/listing/85211294/of-all-the-oyster-shells?ref=v1_other_2
My favorite by far. Nobody can resist an innuendo about putting pearls in shells :3
July 7, 2012 at 1:39 pm
I think I might be able to. I’m definately going to try, anyway.
July 7, 2012 at 1:45 pm
The creative excellence of the spelling is delightful.
July 7, 2012 at 2:12 pm
Those read like a collection of REALLY BAD pick up lines.
July 8, 2012 at 5:12 pm
I would love to cover your pearl in my “Shell”
WHAT DO THE PARENTHESES IMPLY?!
July 8, 2012 at 5:13 pm
shit.
July 8, 2012 at 5:12 pm
I would love to cover your pearl in my “Shell”
WHAT DO THE QUOTATIONS IMPLY?!
July 7, 2012 at 1:42 pm
The owner of this shop is Tommy Lee Jones. I am picturing him agonizing over each of these treasures only to leave them rife with misspellings anyway.
July 7, 2012 at 1:53 pm
I like the shop announcement: Please let me tell you how to get
one oyster shell picture frame did for ( Free.) I also have ( Important Information ) for you…
I wonder what the catch is…..
July 7, 2012 at 1:53 pm
Goat, I agree with you. I also love this one: http://www.etsy.com/listing/77144140/oyster-shell-painted-head?ref=v1_other_2
July 7, 2012 at 2:00 pm
I want one of the Virgin Mary, in blue.
July 7, 2012 at 2:06 pm
Tragicrafting at its finest. There’s also a Saddam Hussein shell, one for Whitney Houston, and two of Michael Jackson in the shop. Stay classy, etsy!
July 7, 2012 at 3:13 pm
O SWEET JESUS, I JUST BOUGHT THE SADDAM HUSSEIN! I think my dad will be thrilled!
July 7, 2012 at 2:31 pm
Wow for a 9 and a half year old that guy had a magnificent beard.
July 7, 2012 at 2:35 pm
I’m loving the warm rush of the breeze on memory lane, but I feel there’s something I don’t know. Why so many flashbacks? Are you on a trip? Is this flashback month? Surgery? The drugs that come after surgery?
It’s the drugs isn’t it?
July 7, 2012 at 2:37 pm
Also if you are going through painful stuff I hope you get better. With out a leader the L in FJL’s will become more apparent and nobody needs that.
July 7, 2012 at 3:02 pm
Heyyyy… I resemble that remark.
July 7, 2012 at 2:54 pm
Now I know what kind of a noise annoys an oyster. The noise of laboured breathing and of a felt marker being uncapped.
July 7, 2012 at 2:58 pm
Too bad there isn’t one with Joan Baez as the girl on the half-shell. An opportunity is being missed here.
July 7, 2012 at 11:59 pm
She’m am dead now, too?
Well I’ll be damned, here comes your ghost again!
July 7, 2012 at 3:04 pm
i ordered one of these for my husband for our anniversary earlier this year. have to say i was actually somewhat disappointed that mine didn’t have a poorly handwritten message on it. my message was printed on a decal similar to the one used for the photo. it’s still awesome, just not the same somehow…
July 7, 2012 at 3:30 pm
i’m AM DEAd, YOU GUIzE!
July 7, 2012 at 3:39 pm
It’s the perfect platter to serve pickled eggs! Once they are all eaten, it will remind that will will be gassy as hell!! Kill two birds, one stone.
July 7, 2012 at 3:56 pm
http://www.etsy.com/listing/74805165/photograph-of-jesus-in-a-oyster
Photograph of Jesus…
Photograph. Of. Jesus.
July 7, 2012 at 4:10 pm
Also, why is he balding when he should be at most 33? I’m starting to think that might not be a genuine picture of Jesus!
July 7, 2012 at 5:55 pm
I was wondering that myself. According to the Bible, he was 30 when he started his ministry and 33 when he was crucified. Unless The Holy Spirit suffered from male pattern baldness, I DON’T think that’s an actual picture of Jesus.
Perhaps it’s a picture of her cousin Mike, the 50+ year old hippie?
July 8, 2012 at 1:06 am
While it is true that Jesus died at 33, it’s actually a little known fact that he was Klingon, as can be clearly seen in that picture.
July 7, 2012 at 4:09 pm
Tommy Lee Jones is the store owner? If this is his fall back plan then it’s no wonder they did another Men in Black movie.
July 7, 2012 at 4:15 pm
and this Osama one is sublime because Muslims cannot eat seafood, shellfish are not Halal
July 7, 2012 at 9:16 pm
Nothing says unique, one-of-a-kind family heirloom like sharpie on the mother of pearls the oyster shell.
July 7, 2012 at 9:33 pm
Does the stand come with it? That could easily be a $2-3 stand right there… Otherwise I can go down to Golden Corral on seafood night and come home to make my own…
July 7, 2012 at 10:27 pm
Huh. I thought Michael died from Propofol, not a massive T2-style gunshot wound to the head. But I was pretty stoned when CNN came on.
HOW IS THIS AMAZING PIECE STILL FOR SALE
July 7, 2012 at 11:00 pm
If’d he’d named it “Amy Winehouse’s Last Stand” I’da bought that mofo.
Son.
July 7, 2012 at 10:59 pm
If the Owner would be so kind, I would like to circumcise my first-born son with the jagged edge of that Uncle Bin Laden oyster shell.
.
My first-born is in his teens now, so that makes the logistics somewhat challenging, but in the end he’ll thank me.
.
I’ll bleach the stains off before returning. Convo me.
July 8, 2012 at 12:18 am
Naah the circumcision blood probably increases the value. You just need to claim that A.) it is artistic, B.) that it has healing powers, and C.) mention some made-up pagan god in your description. Blood could increase the value 10-fold!
July 8, 2012 at 12:06 pm
This thing never fails to crack me up.
I’m pretty much forever jealous that HK owns it and I don’t.
July 8, 2012 at 3:25 pm
This guy’s talent is literally improving with each piece; his spelling on this shell is actually correct! http://www.etsy.com/listing/76435988/bin-laden-dead-on-a-oyster-shell
July 8, 2012 at 3:29 pm
His punctuation is another matter, but I think that can be forgiven, considering the artistic effort he puts into each piece demands most of his concentration.
July 10, 2012 at 11:01 am
I never thought a blog post would change my life. I am now the proud owner of the “think about it monkey,” the “i’m watching you hawk,” and the “I’m am dead bin laden” oysters. I cannot wait until they arrive!
Thank you, HK.
July 12, 2012 at 7:54 am
When ordering do you think I’d be able to specify I want the Willam and Kate version? I can only assume it’s the prototype and the poor chap learnt from his mistake?
Herpderp.