106

I’M GOING TO NEED $30,000

- Submitted by George

BONUS: George Takei posted this on Facebook this week.

106 comments on I’M GOING TO NEED $30,000

  1. Rev. Back It On Up 13
    June 6, 2012 at 11:08 am

    Re-seller! I saw those on Ali Baba for $14.99.

    Thumb up Thumb down +304

    • AntB
      June 6, 2012 at 11:10 am

      This comment made me snort and forget what I was going to write!

      Thumb up Thumb down +42

    • tiny giraffe
      June 6, 2012 at 11:10 am

      No. These are handmade in Bali by indigenous craftsmen. I mean one. One indigenous artist.

      Thumb up Thumb down +87

    • WF11
      June 6, 2012 at 11:52 am

      How much for wholesale?? Convo me.

      Thumb up Thumb down +18

    • sillypoot
      June 6, 2012 at 12:01 pm

      Don’t worry, by the start of season two, there’ll be a giant chair made of barnwood and picket fence pickets titled, “OOAK SteaMPUnK Hunger G4mES Harry p0ttEr GaMe 0f thr0nEs chair authentIC Real Barnwood 60,000$”

      I’m determined for April to have a Game of Thrones replica throne to sit upon, while she shows us the latest in dirty re-sellers, like some kind of medieval superhero. I’ll make it happen if I have to blow everyone at HBO. I’ll need a little female help though for those straight men. It’s the least we could do. “A Lannister FJL always pays his debts.

      Thumb up Thumb down +85

      • Helen Killer
        June 6, 2012 at 12:02 pm

        Well the good news is that there are no straight men at HBO.

        Thumb up Thumb down +99

        • Wells
          June 6, 2012 at 3:25 pm

          Then why does the show have so many boobies?

          Thumb up Thumb down +16

          • avatarofchaos
            June 6, 2012 at 4:04 pm

            Because they’re smart enough to know that chunks of the demographic playing along at home wants to see a bit of the nip. Or a lot of the nip. Or hey, just wait until after 10pm and show the whole shebang to your heart’s content.

            Thumb up Thumb down +13

          • Koby
            June 7, 2012 at 10:14 am

            Allow me to explain…

            (I hope that worked.)

            Thumb up Thumb down +23

  2. Anninyn
    June 6, 2012 at 11:11 am

    Perfect for lording it over the FJL. Will make my increasingly desperate attempts at arse-licking a bit uncomfortable though.

    Thumb up Thumb down +16

    • Anninyn
      June 6, 2012 at 11:15 am

      I’m certain there’s a really witty ‘butthurt’ joke in here somewhere, but someone really witty will have to make it.

      Thumb up Thumb down +27

  3. WotV
    June 6, 2012 at 11:11 am

    As Queen High Priestess of All Things Evil, one of you minions needs to buy this for me. Now. It totally goes with all of my furniture and I think it could be labeled ‘steampunk’.

    Thumb up Thumb down +19

  4. Dynomoose
    June 6, 2012 at 11:11 am

    So it won’t hack you to bits like the real thing?

    Thumb up Thumb down +12

  5. WildJaker
    June 6, 2012 at 11:12 am

    If we sit on the Iron Throne, do we instantly become complete cunts?

    Thumb up Thumb down +54

    • daisyj
      June 6, 2012 at 11:13 am

      And would anyone notice?

      Thumb up Thumb down +63

    • Jackal of all Trades
      June 6, 2012 at 1:53 pm

      I thought we already were.

      Thumb up Thumb down +14

    • WF11
      June 6, 2012 at 2:32 pm

      Yes unless you already were one before sitting on the throne, Joffrey

      Thumb up Thumb down +14

  6. whiskeypants
    June 6, 2012 at 11:12 am

    Dream of Aeron office chair has now been replaced. GAME OF CUBICLES.

    Thumb up Thumb down +99

    • Wednesday
      June 6, 2012 at 11:41 am

      When you play the game of cubicles, you win…or you end up on the party planning committee.

      Thumb up Thumb down +45

  7. rumi monger
    June 6, 2012 at 11:12 am

    HBO-scammer don’t give a shit! It just takes what it wants!

    Thumb up Thumb down +12

  8. HelloKnitty
    June 6, 2012 at 11:13 am

    When ever I see or hear “Game of Thrones” I imagine a chess board with all kinds of chairs on it. (never saw or read any of it)

    Thumb up Thumb down +21

    • littlewidget
      June 6, 2012 at 11:48 am

      I imagine toilets. Lots and lots of toilets.

      Thumb up Thumb down +44

      • queen of spuds
        June 6, 2012 at 4:18 pm

        And now I do too.

        Thumb up Thumb down +16

      • tralfaz
        June 7, 2012 at 2:58 am

        Where’s the toilet paper holder? I see plenty of places to cut the tp …

        Thumb up Thumb down +2

  9. Anonymys
    June 6, 2012 at 11:13 am

    I’ve still not watched the finale. I’m not ready to have nothing to watch for the next several months.

    Thumb up Thumb down +18

  10. crispyduck13
    June 6, 2012 at 11:14 am

    For $30k I’d expect it to be made from real swords. How else would I maim rude houseguests?

    Thumb up Thumb down +63

    • Ministress of Godlessness
      June 6, 2012 at 11:39 am

      If it’s going to be an authentic replica, it better cut me every time I sit down, too.

      Thumb up Thumb down +18

    • Susan
      June 6, 2012 at 11:49 am

      I so want this – saw it last night. Sadly, 30,000 is out of my range. I was thinking of adding razors just to sure it cut anyone who sat in my throne. Excellent addition to my living room

      diclosure: mega Game of Thrones fan and waiting impatiently for book 6

      Thumb up Thumb down +7

    • pearlheartgtr
      June 6, 2012 at 12:24 pm

      For $30k, this fucker better come with a Tetanus shot.

      Thumb up Thumb down +19

      • crispyduck13
        June 6, 2012 at 12:48 pm

        And a hot male nurse to give it to me.

        Thumb up Thumb down +22

  11. Hell Yes
    June 6, 2012 at 11:15 am

    I feel powerful just thinking about sitting in it.

    My kid doesn’t really need a college fund, a therapy fund, maybe.

    Thumb up Thumb down +27

    • Anninyn
      June 6, 2012 at 11:16 am

      Making them pay for College themselves builds character. Bitter, resentful character. As does making them clean this throne.

      Thumb up Thumb down +57

      • asecondsolution
        June 6, 2012 at 11:19 am

        It seems like it has a lot of places to collect dust, too.

        Thumb up Thumb down +10

        • frogprof
          June 6, 2012 at 12:33 pm

          asecondsolution, great minds … I was imagining having to Q-tip out all the cat hair.

          Thumb up Thumb down +13

          • asecondsolution
            June 6, 2012 at 2:16 pm

            Yeah I was originally going to say cat hair, but then I realized that maybe not everyone has 4 cats…

            Thumb up Thumb down +6

            • asecondsolution
              June 6, 2012 at 2:19 pm

              Also Q-tips? If you’re gonna spend $30,000 for this thing I’d invest in one of those mini vacuum hose things for cleaning computer keyboards. In fact I could probably use one of those myself, but I just use a paperclip to lever out the cat hair from my keyboard.

              Thumb up Thumb down +8

              • Kestris
                June 6, 2012 at 8:09 pm

                The sticky part of post it notes work beautifully.

                Thumb up Thumb down +2

  12. Pandora Nervosa
    June 6, 2012 at 11:15 am

    Looks utterly awesome, yet uncomfortable. But perhaps that’s it’s lure.

    I’m not watching it either. Waiting to finish books first. Yes, I’m behind in my pop-culture.

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

  13. Nerdbaby
    June 6, 2012 at 11:16 am

    Holy shit, I need that. Um…who wants to help me rob a bank? We’ll get enough to buy two and we can be twinsies!

    Thumb up Thumb down +19

  14. rachelnyc
    June 6, 2012 at 11:17 am

    I still have my fingers crossed for a finale breakdown over on CF4L …

    also, I think I just found my new beach chair.

    Thumb up Thumb down +25

    • Wednesday
      June 6, 2012 at 11:44 am

      Well, the matching Iron Beach Umbrella *is* only $7250!

      Thumb up Thumb down +16

  15. stoopidbike
    June 6, 2012 at 11:19 am

    Not to be a dick, well, maybe kinda to be a dick… but you’ll actually need $31,800.

    Thumb up Thumb down +31

    • Mugsy Doodle
      June 6, 2012 at 2:53 pm

      April HAS the $1,800. She’s just short $30,000.

      Thumb up Thumb down +16

  16. jazzmoth
    June 6, 2012 at 11:19 am

    Just putting this out there… originally from this tweet:

    What if the “game” in “Game of Thrones” was basketball, and the “thrones” were toilets, and it was about toilets that played basketball?

    Therefore my boyfriend and I now watch Toilets Basketball. I would like to see this throne made into either a basketball hoop or a toilet. Then it would be worth the list price.

    Thumb up Thumb down +8

    • rachelnyc
      June 7, 2012 at 3:07 pm

      This sounds like something that would be on Cartoon Network. With HK as a sass-talking bidet?

      Thumb up Thumb down +1

  17. Phoenixx Down
    June 6, 2012 at 11:24 am

    *Qarth

    Thumb up Thumb down +12

    • sallyrover
      June 6, 2012 at 11:53 am

      “My dragons went to the greatest city that ever was or ever will be and all I got was this lousy T-Shirt.”

      Thumb up Thumb down +21

      • WF11
        June 6, 2012 at 2:34 pm

        But the dragons fucked over the Warlock so you have that going for ya :)

        Thumb up Thumb down +2

  18. Francine
    June 6, 2012 at 11:24 am

    My friend posted this to FB earlier today. I asked if it came with a lifetime supply of band-aids.

    Thumb up Thumb down +6

  19. WotV
    June 6, 2012 at 11:26 am

    This is for people who ALSO love Fifty Shades of Grey. They can get their BDSM AND a place to sit all in one piece of furniture.

    Thumb up Thumb down +5

    • Kestris
      June 6, 2012 at 11:45 am

      Never read Fifty Shades of Grey and have no interest to.

      I have, however, read and rather well liked the first 4 books of the GoT series.

      And it has nothing to do with whether I like BDSM or not.

      Thumb up Thumb down +4

      • sallyrover
        June 6, 2012 at 11:55 am

        Actually, reading these books (and I have read them all), is certainly an exercise in S and M–careful who you love!

        Thumb up Thumb down +12

        • Kestris
          June 6, 2012 at 8:07 pm

          I dunno, I’ve read (and own all but the last 2) John Norman’s Gor series.

          SoIaF is tame compared to those.

          Thumb up Thumb down 0

      • agonzalez
        June 6, 2012 at 12:13 pm

        I’m a HUGE fan of the book series and the HBO show. Since I needed a new book to read while I wait for the 6th book, my friend suggested 50 shades of Grey. I couldn’t get past the first chapter, I had to force myself. Doesn’t even come close to A Song of Ice and Fire series.

        Thumb up Thumb down +10

        • Brad the Butcher
          June 6, 2012 at 1:24 pm

          To this day it still boggles my brainholes that such an awful Twilight fanfic (not that there are many good ones, mind) got published and is now going to be a movie.

          But, on the bright side, at least GRRM got an HBO show. And Iron Throne replicas sold on behalf of his epic series. Ah, now I feel a little better.

          Thumb up Thumb down +8

          • forgottenregretsy
            June 6, 2012 at 7:25 pm

            At least we’ll get to see 60 hours of Game of Thrones awesomeness, while they only ‘get’ to suffer through 10 hours of blech.

            Thumb up Thumb down +4

  20. cakesphere
    June 6, 2012 at 11:27 am

    This is pretty cool, but it’d be even better if it were on casters so I could roll around the room with it.

    Thumb up Thumb down +39

    • Willknitforshoes
      June 6, 2012 at 11:31 am

      I am going to submit this for an office supply request. There’s NO WAY they can turn me down. Do you think it comes with an ergonomical assessment?

      Thumb up Thumb down +21

  21. Princess Buzzkill Crying Glitter Eagle
    June 6, 2012 at 11:27 am

    Why do none of these people respond to my friend requests?

    Thumb up Thumb down +12

  22. Princess Buzzkill Crying Glitter Eagle
    June 6, 2012 at 11:27 am

    About the big chair – is that really something Bronc is going to want to sit on after cycling for 300 miles?

    Thumb up Thumb down +14

    • lemon_bombs
      June 6, 2012 at 7:11 pm

      I’m not sure I’d sit on it after a trip down the hall. Metals splinters are a bitch anywhere, so I don’t like the thought of a tiny iron spear in my ass.

      Thumb up Thumb down +1

  23. Brad the Butcher
    June 6, 2012 at 11:28 am

    I’ve read it’s not as comfortable as it looks (I know, I know, that seems highly impossible but hey, I’m going to have to take the former king’s word for it). That’s why you’ll also need a custom Regretsy ass pillow, to soothe and cushion on those long days of listening to the simpletons and the snobs alike complain about Game of Thrones and related things.

    Thumb up Thumb down +11

  24. amyklaire
    June 6, 2012 at 11:33 am

    I don’t know anything about ‘Game of Thrones’, but I misread ‘Shop the HBO UK’ as ‘Shop Drunk’. Perfect, all of us fat, jealous losers do that, right?

    Thumb up Thumb down +5

  25. Willknitforshoes
    June 6, 2012 at 11:33 am

    Just gonna leave this here: http://geeks.thedailywh.at/2012/06/05/supercut-of-the-day-2/

    Maybe Tyrion and I can share the throne?

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

    • amurana
      June 6, 2012 at 1:17 pm

      I’d happily sit at his feet!

      Thumb up Thumb down +2

  26. Kestris
    June 6, 2012 at 11:41 am

    Unfortunately, I’m going to need $60,000.

    Because the husband simply won’t be happy sitting at my feet, so he’ll need his own.

    Thumb up Thumb down +14

  27. Ministress of Godlessness
    June 6, 2012 at 11:43 am

    All that attention at the end of the description about the chair’s “impressive size” makes me think someone’s compensating for something.

    Possibly something that was maimed as a result of sitting in a chair made out of swords.

    Thumb up Thumb down +18

    • ebinard
      June 6, 2012 at 11:48 am

      I read the impressive size, but read the measurements as inches at first rather than feet, and thought, “well, that’s not that impressive!”

      Thumb up Thumb down +9

      • Zippy
        June 6, 2012 at 12:28 pm

        You are NOT in charge of the Stonehenge model for our concert!

        - Nigel

        Thumb up Thumb down +35

  28. ebinard
    June 6, 2012 at 11:45 am

    I think you’ll need to borrow Bronc’s butt balm if you sit on that for too long! Does it come with a joffrey douche-face mask, or a Cersei bitch-face mask?

    Thumb up Thumb down +11

    • fahsky
      June 6, 2012 at 12:59 pm

      A sack of lemons, to achieve either look.

      Thumb up Thumb down +6

  29. ebinard
    June 6, 2012 at 11:47 am

    I was expecting “local pickup only” but I suppose $1800 probably isnt that much to ship a 12 ton razor sharp chair.

    Thumb up Thumb down +8

  30. Beriadan
    June 6, 2012 at 11:47 am

    I think I have a problem, I looked at the price and thought, “that’s expensive, but if I had the money I’d get it” then, and this is the odd part, I looked at the shipping and thought to myself, “WHAT THE FUCK?! There is no way in hell I would by that shit!”

    Thumb up Thumb down +22

    • pixiemartin
      June 6, 2012 at 11:59 am

      Me too.

      I was all like, “$30k? Whatevs… $1800, are you shitting me?”

      Thumb up Thumb down +6

      • .Rana.
        June 6, 2012 at 12:21 pm

        I feel sorry for the workmen who’d have to carry this heavy thing up stairs!

        Imagine getting a sofa up a narrow stairwell, only ten times heavier and pointier.

        Thumb up Thumb down +8

  31. dOlivia
    June 6, 2012 at 11:54 am

    I’d like that in my living room, except for the 30 grand, and it weighs 350 pounds, so you could never move it unless you kept it on plastic sliders?

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

    • Wednesday
      June 6, 2012 at 11:59 am

      How many ways could one rearrange a throne made of swords in their living room? “Honey, move the big pointy chair closer to the window, I can’t see the TV.”

      Thumb up Thumb down +13

  32. Squarah_Lou
    June 6, 2012 at 11:55 am

    I’ve actually sat on this at the British Sci Fi & Fantasy convention (yes, geek, I know!) and it’s surprisingly comfy! Feels as though it is made of plastic and it would make an AWESOME garden chair.

    Thumb up Thumb down +13

  33. Beeby
    June 6, 2012 at 11:57 am

    Apropos of nothing and not Game of Thrones related, but is there anyone on earth that is in a SIMPLE relationship? They’re all complicated.

    Sorry. The facebook post part made me think of that.

    Thumb up Thumb down +13

  34. persiaa
    June 6, 2012 at 11:58 am

    Only if it comes with a holographic Joffrey that I can kill. Repeatedly.

    Thumb up Thumb down +13

  35. Zippy
    June 6, 2012 at 12:24 pm

    “But only the true King of England could pull the sword from the throne, and so he named it ‘ASSCALIBUR’!”

    Thumb up Thumb down +29

  36. fahsky
    June 6, 2012 at 12:28 pm

    I’m now bummed I’m sensitive to fiberglass. D: Barnwood knockoff for me!

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  37. thecreightonberyl
    June 6, 2012 at 12:48 pm

    After getting poked by that a few times you’ll wish they carried Nerf swords.

    Thumb up Thumb down +6

    • tralfaz
      June 7, 2012 at 3:02 am

      Ooooooo! Pillow made of Nerf swords! Cool!

      Thumb up Thumb down +2

  38. Captain Kangaroo
    June 6, 2012 at 1:03 pm

    Ooooh Myyy

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

  39. auntiebeer
    June 6, 2012 at 1:34 pm

    Too rich for my blood. How much for the Porcelain Throne?

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

  40. Thea
    June 6, 2012 at 1:48 pm

    Perfect for the nursery!

    Thumb up Thumb down +8

  41. Corvidae
    June 6, 2012 at 1:57 pm

    I actually loled at Dany’s like. Its the exclamation point that makes it.

    Thumb up Thumb down +8

  42. Dragon8Lady
    June 6, 2012 at 2:03 pm

    Just would give a guy another excuse to use a bad pick up line

    ‘Hey baby, why don’t we go back to my place. I have a sword you can sit on…’

    Thumb up Thumb down +7

  43. HiGHPOiNT
    June 6, 2012 at 2:24 pm
  44. asecondsolution
    June 6, 2012 at 2:26 pm

    Hmmm, I wonder much it would be to just get the thousand swords and hire a blacksmith to hammer them for 59 days? Hey, you’d save the shipping cost. Buy local!

    Thumb up Thumb down +7

    • makenoapology
      June 8, 2012 at 7:10 am

      have you bought a sword lately? not cheap. :/

      Thumb up Thumb down 0

  45. LexieDi
    June 6, 2012 at 2:38 pm

    But how will I know if it’ll go with my room color?! Sunrise Meadow doesn’t mesh with just any old thing!

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

  46. Menopausalmaniac
    June 6, 2012 at 2:45 pm

    For $30,000, I want a padded seat, needlepoint pillows and a matching throw!

    Give it a couple of weeks and the Chinese will be making knock offs, and the shipping from China will even be cheaper!

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

    • Brad the Butcher
      June 6, 2012 at 3:57 pm

      And the Iron Throne will become the Lead Throne. Yummy.

      Thumb up Thumb down +4

  47. Bitch Pudding
    June 6, 2012 at 3:49 pm

    You should post this in a thread in the iWant section of the forum. Especially because that would look totes cool if you were sitting in it and you had say… Some ball pythons in your lap.

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

  48. Elysapeth
    June 6, 2012 at 3:55 pm

    Amazeballs!
    PS: You know nothing Jon Snow!

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

  49. Vaeyn
    June 6, 2012 at 7:25 pm

    Love it.. want it.

    Wait.. George Takei? Is he a FJL!? Because that would be amazing.

    Thumb up Thumb down +6

  50. Wile E SongDog
    June 6, 2012 at 8:10 pm
    • tijde
      June 7, 2012 at 11:40 am

      This is my new favorite thing!

      Thumb up Thumb down +1

  51. JessRaquel
    June 6, 2012 at 10:05 pm

    I wish I could “like” this entire status.

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

  52. thaumasia
    June 6, 2012 at 11:20 pm

    Thumb up Thumb down +6

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