FROM THE MAILBAG
My Petja Palooza Swag bag arrived today, and exceeded all my expectations.
My Mother happened to be over, so of course I had her model my favorite item. Then we had a fist fight over who gets to keep it.
Handcut Petja Beard by Naffrodisia • Sex toys and discount code from Extreme Restraints
I’m off to update my Match.com profile with information of my newly acquired cock ring and 20% off coupon for sex toys. Wish me luck!
Forever yours in fuckery,
I got my new license plates today, bitchez!
I purchased the Lil Wayne Knobs and I am SOOOOO excited!
We live just outside of New Orleans, so Lil Weezy is kind of a big deal around here. And we have just remodeled our kitchen in a french country style – very traditional. I thought they would look PERFECT on a few cabinet doors in our kitchen.
I was right!
Now my kitchen is the most gangsta kitchen ever… except Lil Wayne’s kitchen, cause he’s in it.
Much Love and Fuckery,
I saw this on eBay, and I thought of you.
When applying for a job with Vegans, make sure to wear your wool suit jacket!
When you featured me for the CF4L Octopi, I sent my parents the link. They were proud of me, since I haven’t accomplished much in life.
I made $500 that week, which was just enough to bring my parents up for a tiny wedding ceremony (and send their asses back to Florida).
As a thank you, I wanted to send you something special. We’ve always said my father resembles Robert DeNiro with a bad haircut, so here’s a picture of him, the night before my wedding, in my stilettos, pinching his nipples.
Today’s post reminded me of this piece of artwork hanging in the halls of a local Catholic College. It is a life-sized Jesus made entirely out of yarn, stuffed with straw (I think) and nailed to a large wooden cross.
I assure you, It’s much more horrific in person. I didn’t want the nuns getting upset so I wasn’t able to pose my kids in front of it, but it’s gigantic, with Jesus maybe being 6 feet tall not counting the arms or cross.
-Nikki (Keeping the God in OMFG)
It looks like Etsy has added more keywords in response to customer demands. Thought you’d get a dainty lady-boner out of the first one.
I know Christmas is over and everything, but I just got around to eating my Russell Stover Caramel Santa, and I was hoping you could help me understand what part of him I got exactly.
Hey, thanks for the great suggestion, gmail.