94

Regretsy Math

94 comments on Regretsy Math

  1. bethymania
    May 11, 2012 at 4:31 pm

    One of her breasts is trying to escape.

    Thumb up Thumb down +87

    • manybellsdown
      May 11, 2012 at 4:32 pm

      Clearly that’s her Womb, Man.

      Thumb up Thumb down +106

    • Anita Cocktail
      May 11, 2012 at 4:37 pm

      That’s not her breast…it’s a collection of Jello Pudding Pops.

      Thumb up Thumb down +52

    • toaster
      May 11, 2012 at 8:47 pm

      Like she has time to worry about a runaway breast when her cheeks are melting.

      Thumb up Thumb down +28

      • Stretch65
        May 11, 2012 at 10:46 pm

        How can you put a price on a Strong Black Queen?!

        2010 Winner of Ru-Paul’s Drag Race

        Thumb up Thumb down +14

  2. jadeeye
    May 11, 2012 at 4:33 pm

    You’d look like that too if your breasts were large and free-floating enough to beat you in the face constantly.

    Thumb up Thumb down +93

    • Hostilebear
      May 11, 2012 at 9:20 pm

      EVERYBODY SING!

      Do your boobs hang low?
      Do they wobble too and frow?
      Can you tie them in a knot?
      Can you tie them in a bow?
      Can you throw them over your shoulder,
      Like a continental soldier?
      Do your boobs…
      hang…
      low?

      Thumb up Thumb down +21

      • MyEyesMyEyes
        May 12, 2012 at 8:59 am

        One of my favorite songs ever. But in this case I think the song should be “are your boobs too high? do they poke you in the eye”

        Thumb up Thumb down +57

  3. StrokeMyPantyHamster
    May 11, 2012 at 4:35 pm

    Why is she wearing the lid to my trash can?

    Thumb up Thumb down +26

  4. deenadj
    May 11, 2012 at 4:36 pm

    I don’t think I want recognition of any level in anything called “Follies”.

    Thumb up Thumb down +37

    • Mapleleaves
      May 11, 2012 at 6:20 pm

      The artist’s spellcheck didn’t know the word “Foibles.”

      Thumb up Thumb down +6

      • sumu
        May 12, 2012 at 7:53 am

        however, it did work for the word ‘earth’ which she corrected in her profile name:

        Urth n Earth Poetusic Studio

        although ‘poetusic’ still has me scratching my head…

        Thumb up Thumb down +6

  5. Billie
    May 11, 2012 at 4:40 pm

    SO afraid

    Thumb up Thumb down +1

    • monkey33
      May 11, 2012 at 5:31 pm

      Come under the bridge with me and eat some Jello pudding with me.

      Thumb up Thumb down +8

  6. thenshewaslike
    May 11, 2012 at 4:41 pm

    Thumb up Thumb down +92

    • archaeologistbarbie
      May 11, 2012 at 5:01 pm

      LATRICE ROYALE.

      thank god someone else posted my fave queen from rupaul’s drag race.

      Thumb up Thumb down +12

    • .Rana.
      May 11, 2012 at 5:26 pm

      La-treeeeeeece!

      Thumb up Thumb down +13

    • ralphgenderqueer
      May 11, 2012 at 6:06 pm

      latrice is a biscuit! let her sop
      you up!

      Thumb up Thumb down +17

      • archaeologistbarbie
        May 12, 2012 at 4:06 pm

        Latrice can sop me up any day of the week! She’s my religion.

        Thumb up Thumb down +2

    • Dracarys
      May 11, 2012 at 8:19 pm

      NO T NO SHADE!

      Thumb up Thumb down +10

    • docleather
      May 11, 2012 at 8:28 pm

      loves me some Latrice!!

      Thumb up Thumb down +8

    • HammerTime
      May 12, 2012 at 11:46 am

      I lip-read that as “Go Blaaaa”

      Thumb up Thumb down +1

  7. angelbuttons77
    May 11, 2012 at 4:42 pm

    Uh, is it wrong that when she said “queen” in the title, I immediately said, well, yes, that’s a wonderful painting of a cross-dresser?

    Thumb up Thumb down +24

    • Dibba
      May 11, 2012 at 4:44 pm

      Perfectly understandable reaction. However, I still don’t know why he/she is wearing one of their boobs on their shoulder :/

      Thumb up Thumb down +34

    • EyeHeartSpiders
      May 13, 2012 at 9:44 am

      I’d like to apologize to all the drag queens who are no doubt reading this (why wouldn’t you be?). Black, white, or other, I’m sure you look nothing like this monstrosity.

      Thumb up Thumb down +2

  8. KJGoddess
    May 11, 2012 at 4:42 pm

    aww, shit. we’re “wombman” now? I was just trying to get used to being called a “womyn”.

    Thumb up Thumb down +58

    • lanilanilani
      May 11, 2012 at 4:53 pm

      it’s probably worse than that. it’s probably wombyn or something like that. just so those damn men don’t forget WE are the ones who have the babies.

      Thumb up Thumb down +20

      • toaster
        May 11, 2012 at 8:49 pm

        Well if you ever run into a man that forgets that it’s females that have babies and not males, then he’s got a whole other set of problems to attend to.

        Thumb up Thumb down +21

  9. missy13d69
    May 11, 2012 at 4:42 pm

    Honorable recognition? Isn’t that the adult equivalent of the “Participation” award from kindergarten?

    Thumb up Thumb down +87

    • Mrs.Vagoo
      May 11, 2012 at 5:44 pm

      “Participation” is one step down from “honorable recognition”, but it one step up from “existence”

      Thumb up Thumb down +33

  10. Dibba
    May 11, 2012 at 4:42 pm

    Perhaps she was captured ‘mid dance’? Like that episode of the Simpsons where Homer stops moving but his belly doesn’t?

    Thumb up Thumb down +31

  11. Kitchen Bish
    May 11, 2012 at 4:42 pm

    Look, between her legs!
    It’s a dildo!
    It’s a tampon!
    No, it’s Wombman!
    Faster than a queef
    More powerful than the Hitachi Magic Wand
    Able to bleed for many days and not die!
    Who disguised as Shanequa Jenkins, mild mannered African American stereotype with lopsided breasts fights the unending battle for truth, justice, and the American way.

    Thumb up Thumb down +134

    • bethymania
      May 11, 2012 at 4:48 pm

      Haters can thumbs-down all they want, but this is brilliant.

      Thumb up Thumb down +14

      • AutobotDen
        May 11, 2012 at 7:23 pm

        Why thumbs-down? It really is brilliant.

        Thumb up Thumb down +12

        • bethymania
          May 14, 2012 at 3:21 pm

          When I posted that comment the post had a negative score. I should have known people would get wise.

          Thumb up Thumb down 0

      • tralfaz
        May 12, 2012 at 1:59 am

        Tons more character than the artist’s straight-on full-face paintings. I suppose that nay nay is truly supposed to be in your face. In fact, is it speaking YOUR name, too? Now if only the up shoulder was on her right side. An anatomy class (see below) or a live model and a lesson in non-flash photography is all that’s needed.

        Thumb up Thumb down +3

  12. wavewench
    May 11, 2012 at 4:43 pm

    Commas, are, fun to, use. Look here’s, one. Are, there, rules or anything?

    On, Planet Womb the Wombmen have strong features portraying strength and determination, Yet elegance. They are Strong and Bold. So strong and bold they don’t need necks or anything.

    Either that or it’s John Merrick in drag.

    Thumb up Thumb down +50

    • ConsumingShadows
      May 11, 2012 at 5:57 pm

      You made me laugh throughout, but that last line…I was so thinking it, and then I had to actually laugh out loud. Had I been drinking something it would have totally been a spit take.
      I hate to be *that guy*(girl), but for the record his name was actually Joseph Merrick, not John, can’t remember how that one got mixed up though…

      Thumb up Thumb down +6

      • LeeLooDallas
        May 11, 2012 at 5:59 pm

        Here he’s depicted as The Elegant Man.

        Thumb up Thumb down +28

      • baby jane
        May 11, 2012 at 11:16 pm

        Because Dr Treves, the guy who took care of him, was really old when he wrote his memoirs and he kept referring to him as John because his memory was failing.
        Joseph Merrick also had a sister with a deformity – not many people know that.

        I do, because I’m awesome. Or a loser. I can’t decide.

        Thumb up Thumb down +15

        • Steampunk Octopus
          May 12, 2012 at 2:44 am

          You’re weird. Just like the rest of us. Which makes you awesome!

          Thumb up Thumb down +8

    • Kitchen Bish
      May 11, 2012 at 6:07 pm

      Am I the only one who read this in Shatner’s voice?:)

      Thumb up Thumb down +21

      • ChaosTheory
        May 12, 2012 at 8:33 am

        We would have also accepted Walken.

        Thumb up Thumb down +15

  13. tejasmom
    May 11, 2012 at 4:48 pm

    I’m so glad you found a photo of Rondo Hatton. I’d rather see a portrait of him, all by himself.

    Thumb up Thumb down +9

  14. butts lol
    May 11, 2012 at 4:53 pm

    You know, Regretsy, you’re right. It IS time to re-watch Porky’s II: The Next Day.

    Thumb up Thumb down +8

  15. yecats
    May 11, 2012 at 5:00 pm

    I await the day that these Etsy artists start drawing people with necks.

    Thumb up Thumb down +30

  16. thecreightonberyl
    May 11, 2012 at 5:13 pm

    Bill Cosby with Acromegaly! THAT would have made ‘Leonard Part 6′ work!

    Thumb up Thumb down +14

  17. Portmandont
    May 11, 2012 at 5:15 pm

    All of a sudden, I really want some Jell-O pudding. Chocolate flavored, of course. Because I’ve got a proud womb, man!

    Thumb up Thumb down +6

  18. mamaursula
    May 11, 2012 at 5:29 pm

    More from this awe inspiring artist – http://www.etsy.com/listing/92361289/afrikan-goddess-in-prayershe-is-a

    Subtitled “She is a special goddess”, perhaps because she has 6 fingers on her right hand?

    Thumb up Thumb down +13

    • LeeLooDallas
      May 11, 2012 at 5:57 pm

      Well, that is in the description. At least the artist meant for it to be there.

      Thumb up Thumb down +12

      • Steampunk Octopus
        May 11, 2012 at 9:06 pm

        So then, yes. She’s a special goddess because she has 6 fingers on her right hand. Cool.

        Thumb up Thumb down +4

    • sisqi
      May 11, 2012 at 6:00 pm

      and thiiiiis little piggy…. whoah what the fuck!? I don’t know what this little piggy does!

      Thumb up Thumb down +19

      • Kitchen Bish
        May 11, 2012 at 6:08 pm

        This little piggy killed my father. Prepare to die!

        Thumb up Thumb down +36

        • emilyrocks
          May 11, 2012 at 6:25 pm

          “Someone’s looking for you.” *thunk*

          Thumb up Thumb down +8

    • HammerTime
      May 12, 2012 at 11:48 am

      That explains her enigmatic smile. Mystery solved.

      Thumb up Thumb down 0

    • EyeHeartSpiders
      May 13, 2012 at 9:48 am

      If SHE’S a goddess, to whom is she praying?

      Thumb up Thumb down +1

  19. bschooled
    May 11, 2012 at 6:05 pm

    Strong, indeed! A set of brass knuckles wouldn’t even mess with those cheekbones…

    Thumb up Thumb down +5

    • LeeLooDallas
      May 11, 2012 at 6:09 pm

      True, you could hide a sandwich under those cheekbones.

      Thumb up Thumb down +7

  20. Mapleleaves
    May 11, 2012 at 6:22 pm

    I once read a list of items that were “advice to gay men.” The first one was “you are not a strong black woman.”

    Clearly. Gay men who do drag know to make their chest balance.

    Thumb up Thumb down +33

    • Best With The Smell
      May 11, 2012 at 6:46 pm

      Wait. I’m strong and black, albeit a gay man. What does this mean for me?

      Thumb up Thumb down +15

      • Mapleleaves
        May 11, 2012 at 7:04 pm

        Depends on whether you do drag.

        Thumb up Thumb down +9

        • Best With The Smell
          May 12, 2012 at 5:05 am

          I don’t. Should I start?

          Thumb up Thumb down +13

          • Mapleleaves
            May 12, 2012 at 6:12 pm

            That is a completely individual choice. Based on physical appearance, lack of social anxiety, and comfort level with duct tape.

            Thumb up Thumb down +4

          • Derpette
            May 12, 2012 at 8:52 pm

            And your ability to change the size of the smell.

            Thumb up Thumb down +3

          • EyeHeartSpiders
            May 13, 2012 at 9:49 am

            Let’s not forget wardrobe budget!

            Thumb up Thumb down +1

  21. Brad the Butcher
    May 11, 2012 at 6:41 pm

    Wombman! Woooomb, man!

    Thumb up Thumb down +10

    • angelbuttons77
      May 12, 2012 at 4:33 am

      They make me horny, Saturday mornie….

      Thumb up Thumb down +1

  22. Best With The Smell
    May 11, 2012 at 6:49 pm

    …what, no Derp for the seller misspelling “wombyn?” With the M-word?

    Also, I didn’t know that the seller knew my Aunt Bessie, much less painted her back in the ’70′s.

    Thumb up Thumb down +7

  23. Bumptious Thuggery
    May 11, 2012 at 7:11 pm

    Madam+ a sack of potatoes= Proud Wombmyn

    Thumb up Thumb down +8

  24. Dawn
    May 11, 2012 at 7:14 pm

    Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na Wombman!

    Thumb up Thumb down +57

    • Ejia
      May 11, 2012 at 9:48 pm

      Does he have Bat-Chauvinist Pig Repellent-Spray?

      Thumb up Thumb down +14

    • Harley Quinn
      May 11, 2012 at 10:20 pm

      Is there a Wombgirl and a Wombwoman?

      Thumb up Thumb down +7

  25. Happy Rhinestone
    May 11, 2012 at 7:56 pm

    Even if face can stop, boob can not be stop.

    Thumb up Thumb down +27

  26. Trickster
    May 11, 2012 at 8:05 pm

    At some point, “Eh, one’s always bigger than the other,” is just a thin excuse to avoid a desperately-needed mammography.

    Thumb up Thumb down +20

  27. docleather
    May 11, 2012 at 8:29 pm

    Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

    Thumb up Thumb down -6

  28. aliceblue
    May 11, 2012 at 9:06 pm

    Reminds me of the Flexi-bra from “Are You Being Served.” Wonder if the one in the picture rotates?
    http://sharetv.org/shows/are_you_being_served_uk/episodes/119000

    Thumb up Thumb down +10

    • Danny Potter
      May 12, 2012 at 9:58 pm

      I love that show! My favorite is the gay menswear clerk.

      And the dirty-old-man store owner/head guy

      Thumb up Thumb down 0

  29. skratte
    May 11, 2012 at 9:13 pm

    Rocky Dennis + Blaxploitation

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

  30. Steampunk Octopus
    May 11, 2012 at 9:25 pm

    Is this strong bold black Wombman an arm wrestler? Or just a Leftie?

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

  31. k4yy4k
    May 11, 2012 at 9:25 pm

    Her breasticles are literally
    O_o

    Thumb up Thumb down +19

  32. Rabbits ‘n’ Chainsaws
    May 11, 2012 at 10:11 pm

    Setting aside what’s up with her face, lets talk about the peculiar gravitational anomaly that seems to be effecting her right breast.

    Thumb up Thumb down +6

  33. Harley Quinn
    May 11, 2012 at 10:23 pm

    Holy shit, her cheekbones look like they can cut you.
    Also, it appears as if her right breast is attempting to escape.

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  34. talulahgosh
    May 11, 2012 at 10:56 pm

    dude, YOUR NAME TOTALLY ROCKS. and i got it, instantly. it had the ring of “cliff beefpile”. i instantly adore anything and everything you say.

    member #37621

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

  35. Partially Creative
    May 12, 2012 at 4:48 am

    Boobs rising and cheekbones dropping simultaneously. I didn’t know I had that to look forward to with ageing. (Or is it something that happens only to Strong Bold Black Queen Wombmen?)

    Thumb up Thumb down +9

  36. leese
    May 12, 2012 at 8:39 am

    Did she try to paint Latrice Royale?

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

  37. MyEyesMyEyes
    May 12, 2012 at 8:56 am

    “Honorable Recognition in the Healthcare Follies” is actually code for “poster child for why plastic surgery is a good thing”

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

  38. mingamonga
    May 12, 2012 at 10:00 am

    I wish I could get my right tit to do that.

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

  39. RavenMad
    May 13, 2012 at 12:33 am

    “Healthcare Follies” must refer to what her plastic surgeon was drinking during her breast augmentation.

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  40. Delfin Joaquin Paris III
    May 13, 2012 at 1:13 pm

    I heard a rumor that her husband is always seen to her right. Not sure why.

    Thumb up Thumb down +1

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