I bought one of these for my friend’s birthday. I think I’m officially the Best Friend Ever. At least, I think that’s what the squealing and arm-flapping indicated…
A friend of mine rented a small, carved-out studio in an old building in Queens with a ridiculously high ceiling…and a 3-bulb light fixture in the ceiling that, with the bottom bulb missing looked JUST like the Salt Monster. We’d lie on the floor and stare at the Salt Monster. No, we weren’t high or even drunk. Just easily entertained.
I just want to clarify that we were 21 at the time…which may make this weirder or sadder, but it was a long time ago. There were no computers or video games, if that helps my case.
If not for the insane price tag, I can totally see this sitting somewhere in my apartment. Nothing like an antelope horned demon with dandelion seeds for hair to brighten up a room.
Wow. The Exu we have in OUR house is made of river rock and cowrie shells, and didn’t cost NEARLY that much. Plus, MigraineMan made him.
Although we generally don’t do the Christian part of the syncretism going on that you see with classic Haitian Voodoo or Santeria or Condomble. The Condomble is what you’re looking at in his shop.
Actually, I would say it is closer to Macumba, Umbanda or Quimbada. He has many images of Pomba Giras, which Candomble doesn’t recognize, as well as Exu Veludo, which is strongly associated with Macumba. From his profile, where he mentions both Southern Brazil and Northern Brazil, we may be looking at completely different practices, but I am not well acquainted with them.
And some of those images are a joke.
Candomble, as a religious movement, is based on a return to the Yoruba traditions and doesn’t follow syncretic practices (although many practitioners do frequent both a Christian church and the terreiro, they see them as separate practices and scorn the syncretic associations such as Yemanja/Saint Barbara).
Oh your right, it is the salt sucker creature. Bad me, I thought it was an old bloopers reel photo –from “The Time Machine”– of a Morlock making a face for the hot Elois.
Hmm. I think the Exu would look better without the cheesy “Party America” accessories.
Wow , maybe i am in the wrong profession, LOL i need to make me an Exu. with a huge ding dong and an eye as a naval. Or i need to raise my prices. Hey peeps you want an $ 300 dollar guitar pick? you can really play with it
I wouldn’t want to pay that much money for it, but I love it and all the other stuff he has in shop. Not most people’s cup of tea, but I will enjoy seeing them suggested in my “you might want to buy this, you weirdo” suggestions on Etsy.
There’s one lauding our favorite lawyer, one with evil cupcakes, one with dunces, various ones with various messages and several filled with the same ‘unique’ items!
When I saw this my I was like “Holy crap, I know this artist!” This is one of Master Saint’s Exu sculptures, I know him and his wife fairly well. They are nice people but make very interesting art. Just think, now he can add Regretsy on his resume.
April 27, 2012 at 5:03 pm
Wait, is Dennis Rodman’s tongue actually that long?
April 27, 2012 at 5:04 pm
Maybe his name should be Dennis Tongueman.
April 27, 2012 at 5:07 pm
I guess all his tailor needs to look at it his tongue.
April 27, 2012 at 5:33 pm
No, that’s just a genital wart growing on his bottom lip.
April 27, 2012 at 5:03 pm
The eyes for nipples creeps me out. Like I need *another* set of eyes staring at my tits…?
April 27, 2012 at 5:26 pm
I heartily disagree. Those eyenipples are my favorite thing in the universe now and they remind me of this piggy bank:
Note that watermark and the image source! I wonder if anyone tries to pass this little dude off as handmade…
April 27, 2012 at 5:42 pm
I bought one of these for my friend’s birthday. I think I’m officially the Best Friend Ever. At least, I think that’s what the squealing and arm-flapping indicated…
April 27, 2012 at 5:52 pm
You definitely are. That reaction can only mean one of two things: best friend ever or abject terror.
April 27, 2012 at 5:55 pm
For anyone who’s never seen one of these things in action: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8cvdqmqVbh0
April 28, 2012 at 5:38 pm
1) Those are awesome.
2) I blame you for my getting sucked into a YouTube black hole.
April 27, 2012 at 7:03 pm
How about another set of tits staring into your eyes?
April 27, 2012 at 7:04 pm
Dammit dammit dammit this was supposed to go under tracibub’s comment. Why can’t I ever get the hang of this stuff????
April 27, 2012 at 7:27 pm
It is under it, but the replies go in ascending chronological order so it winds up being positioned beneath the face bank horror.
Sweet pic though. Magritte?
April 29, 2012 at 2:49 am
Didn’t see them before. Can’t unsee. Eff youuu
April 27, 2012 at 5:03 pm
This is how I imagine Calista Flockhart without makeup looks.
April 27, 2012 at 5:08 pm
Nah. Sarah Palin.
April 27, 2012 at 5:09 pm
Eye nipples included?
April 27, 2012 at 5:32 pm
JarJar.
April 28, 2012 at 8:39 am
Yes. And $3K to have JarJar killed and mummified? So worth it.
April 27, 2012 at 9:44 pm
Based on the expression I’m guessing that the thing just saw its asking price.
April 27, 2012 at 5:08 pm
Sweet fucking Mary. It’s the prince of my nightmares.
April 27, 2012 at 5:08 pm
Is this thing supposed to keep things in the cemetery or keep them out?
April 27, 2012 at 5:24 pm
He just “keeps” the cemetery. In other words, he’s the lawn mower man…
April 27, 2012 at 5:10 pm
Man, that thing on the left scared the fuck outta me when I was a kid. The thing in the middle scared the fuck outta me as an adult.
April 27, 2012 at 5:13 pm
Okay… what in the holy bucket of fuck is this? Eye for a navel? O.o
[img]http://img2.etsystatic.com/il_570xN.307218458.jpg[/img]
April 27, 2012 at 5:15 pm
Doh, pooched my coding for the pic. Hurp durp.
April 27, 2012 at 5:27 pm
OH SHIT HE’S EVEN GOT AN EYE NAVEL
April 27, 2012 at 5:28 pm
Do you think he has an eye anus too?
April 27, 2012 at 5:30 pm
Nope, no eye anus, but his penis looks extremely alarming.
April 27, 2012 at 6:03 pm
A friend of mine rented a small, carved-out studio in an old building in Queens with a ridiculously high ceiling…and a 3-bulb light fixture in the ceiling that, with the bottom bulb missing looked JUST like the Salt Monster. We’d lie on the floor and stare at the Salt Monster. No, we weren’t high or even drunk. Just easily entertained.
April 27, 2012 at 6:43 pm
I just want to clarify that we were 21 at the time…which may make this weirder or sadder, but it was a long time ago. There were no computers or video games, if that helps my case.
April 28, 2012 at 1:13 pm
I had nightmares about the Salt Monster, I kid you not.
April 27, 2012 at 5:11 pm
If not for the insane price tag, I can totally see this sitting somewhere in my apartment. Nothing like an antelope horned demon with dandelion seeds for hair to brighten up a room.
April 27, 2012 at 5:12 pm
How about the Donnie Darko Bunny + Patsy from absolutely fabulous?
April 27, 2012 at 6:54 pm
GENIUS, sweetie dahhling!
April 28, 2012 at 2:01 pm
I was thinking Donnie Darko Bunny + C3PO
April 28, 2012 at 8:18 pm
Figured I’d put in the effort of putting this together. Obviously I haven’t had enough to drink yet…
Please excuse the piss poor effort…
April 28, 2012 at 8:22 pm
Please note, I absolutely love Ab Fab and Joanna Lumley, and this certainly isn’t a dig at her!
April 27, 2012 at 5:13 pm
Before I clicked on the Facebook link, I thought it looked like Frank from Donnie Darko.
April 27, 2012 at 5:18 pm
I thought it was a Phil Spector style minotaur sporting Tori Spelling’s “stunned vagina” expression…
April 27, 2012 at 5:22 pm
INJOKE!
Oh-Oh! Someone’s getting a brand new godspouse!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eshu
April 27, 2012 at 5:26 pm
He could be the God of Regretsy!!
April 27, 2012 at 5:33 pm
I’m thinking more the pale man from Pan’s Labyrinth http://collider.com/uploads/imageGallery/Pans_Labyrinth/doug_jones_in_pans_labyrinth__4_.jpg
plus Pan from the same movie http://collider.com/uploads/imageGallery/Pans_Labyrinth/doug_jones_in_pans_labyrinth__2_.jpg
and a dash of La Chupacabra http://i815.photobucket.com/albums/zz72/bbarkan/ch2.jpg
April 27, 2012 at 10:08 pm
Mmm, Doug Jones. With that lovely thought, you almost made me like this abomination.
April 27, 2012 at 11:32 pm
Different religious imagery.
April 27, 2012 at 5:33 pm
Wow. The Exu we have in OUR house is made of river rock and cowrie shells, and didn’t cost NEARLY that much. Plus, MigraineMan made him.
Although we generally don’t do the Christian part of the syncretism going on that you see with classic Haitian Voodoo or Santeria or Condomble. The Condomble is what you’re looking at in his shop.
THE WEIRDNESS IS EVERYWHERE!
April 27, 2012 at 9:52 pm
Actually, I would say it is closer to Macumba, Umbanda or Quimbada. He has many images of Pomba Giras, which Candomble doesn’t recognize, as well as Exu Veludo, which is strongly associated with Macumba. From his profile, where he mentions both Southern Brazil and Northern Brazil, we may be looking at completely different practices, but I am not well acquainted with them.
And some of those images are a joke.
Candomble, as a religious movement, is based on a return to the Yoruba traditions and doesn’t follow syncretic practices (although many practitioners do frequent both a Christian church and the terreiro, they see them as separate practices and scorn the syncretic associations such as Yemanja/Saint Barbara).
April 27, 2012 at 5:35 pm
He has a handmade iron tool in his hand, which is removable
…batteries not included?
April 27, 2012 at 6:43 pm
They never are.
April 27, 2012 at 5:43 pm
I cannot understand how his creator passed up the opportunity for a blinkie weeinie.
April 27, 2012 at 5:56 pm
Actually pretty cool… But not $3,100 cool…
April 27, 2012 at 6:04 pm
For 3 grand the damn thing better be made of gold
April 27, 2012 at 6:04 pm
I suspect Exu Tiriri’s boner is from scoping out the bodacious ta-tas on the other items in that store.
April 27, 2012 at 6:25 pm
Have you seen this sellers other sculptures? All the females have their boobies showing, and what big boobies they have indeed. http://img2.etsystatic.com/il_fullxfull.307222038.jpg
April 27, 2012 at 10:56 pm
I’m not too sure all his items have a “spiritual” purpose. I see him more as one of the sculptors for Robot Chicken.
April 27, 2012 at 6:31 pm
I am so glad that there will never be another one like it!
April 27, 2012 at 7:06 pm
The Star Trek salt sucker creature! She was the last of her kind! Oh, one of my all-time favorites–I’m totally geeking out.
April 28, 2012 at 9:07 pm
Oh your right, it is the salt sucker creature. Bad me, I thought it was an old bloopers reel photo –from “The Time Machine”– of a Morlock making a face for the hot Elois.
Hmm. I think the Exu would look better without the cheesy “Party America” accessories.
April 27, 2012 at 7:07 pm
Shit like this is why I have to clear my “recently viewed” every time I go to etsy.
April 27, 2012 at 7:15 pm
Wow , maybe i am in the wrong profession, LOL i need to make me an Exu. with a huge ding dong and an eye as a naval. Or i need to raise my prices. Hey peeps you want an $ 300 dollar guitar pick? you can really play with it
April 27, 2012 at 7:25 pm
There’s only one cemetery?!
April 27, 2012 at 7:39 pm
There is no Zuul, only Exu Tiriri!
April 27, 2012 at 8:13 pm
I think it’s more like:
plus
equals
April 27, 2012 at 8:30 pm
Throw him on the Grill He looks like Good Eatin’.
April 27, 2012 at 8:31 pm
EYE NIPPLES WTF
April 28, 2012 at 8:17 am
I know! What happens to ‘em when the cemetery is cold at night?
April 27, 2012 at 8:40 pm
I prefer this:
April 27, 2012 at 8:51 pm
Spot on!
April 27, 2012 at 9:24 pm
I read that in Fry’s voice.
April 27, 2012 at 10:13 pm
I love you, both for the amazing accuracy and the dorky cultural references (that I actually get, for once).
April 29, 2012 at 4:44 pm
WE HAVE A WINNAR
April 27, 2012 at 8:58 pm
How the hell do you find these things? What are your search terms?
ridiculously expensive, ugly, demonic?
April 27, 2012 at 9:38 pm
I kinda like it..although it costs $1000 more than my Volvo did.
April 28, 2012 at 2:15 pm
It costs more than that Columbian hooker’s Volvo did.
April 27, 2012 at 9:41 pm
This thing will haunt my nightmares.
Good God!
April 27, 2012 at 10:52 pm
I have so added this to my favorite shops.
I wouldn’t want to pay that much money for it, but I love it and all the other stuff he has in shop. Not most people’s cup of tea, but I will enjoy seeing them suggested in my “you might want to buy this, you weirdo” suggestions on Etsy.
April 28, 2012 at 1:54 am
Can we have a tag added, “Not Safe For Sanity”?
April 28, 2012 at 6:09 am
Kinda cute,
who doesn’t love tiny green demons with raging boners? who??
April 28, 2012 at 8:21 am
If you have a moment, log in to Etsy and ‘Favorite’ some of the CF4L protest treasuries there.
There’s one lauding our favorite lawyer, one with evil cupcakes, one with dunces, various ones with various messages and several filled with the same ‘unique’ items!
April 28, 2012 at 9:05 am
What has been seen cannot be unseen.
I kept on thinking of putting it in the basement…then I’d give you a dollar to go down first.
April 28, 2012 at 11:46 am
When I saw this my I was like “Holy crap, I know this artist!” This is one of Master Saint’s Exu sculptures, I know him and his wife fairly well. They are nice people but make very interesting art. Just think, now he can add Regretsy on his resume.
April 28, 2012 at 8:01 pm
I feel like he’s escaped from some sort of labyrinth to terrorize the world with his tit nip eyes.