I can’t tell whose teeth are the fakest.
I WANT THIS.
It’s only through Regretsy that I learned that there are good and bad taxidermists, and that stuffing a dead animal is actually an art. This is not good taxidermy.
I am making a similar face in my middle school yearbook photo.
True story–I actually braved the basement to find my middle school yearbook, pulled out the one from 7th grade and discovered that middle-school-me had scribbled the picture out…if only I had known this face was marketable on Etsy…sigh
Time to ask your friends from middle school for help!
I’m sure it’s on classmates.com
A likely story…
Isn’t this what Facebook groups are for though? For people to post class photos and tag all their grade school classmates who would rather not remember their awkward years?
Dead things do not belong inside.
Shit! Don’t tell The Bloggess!
I almost peed when I saw how big this fucking cat is smiling. Jesus. Someone fed him MDMA prior to shooting him?? I can’t think of another explanation…
Hey, was I imagining it, or were you gone for a while? I was getting worried…
Yeah, BGS, you’ve been missed!! Come here and let me give you a big hug and scritch behind the ears!!
*licks Mugsy’s hand*
*jumps on Mugsy’s lap*
*licks my own drool off of Mugsy’s face*
yeah…bummer…I was in the joint man.
Hope you shivved someone, just for the hell of it. Gotta keep ‘em on their toes!
That’s s-h-i-v-v-e-d, not shiwed. I don’t know what shiwed is.
“Hey guys! Wanna play? My mom will make us Nesquick!”
This is the only pet my landlord will let me have
It’s name is Hideous Kitty, and it wants to be your friend.
All these taxidermied animals with weird expressions are making me cackle manically.
There are so damn many, I don’t know if I should laugh for the funny or cry for the animals.*
(*except the dead bird. never the dead bird.)
This made me laugh so hard I am both crying and peed a little. I know TMI.
Great. Now EVERYONE in the house is awake and pissed off at me.
Did they use dried banana pieces for the eyes (shudder)
These taxidermys are making my son scream- THANK YOU for my son’s nightmare tonight……. I plan to tell him it was real and this life is a dream….. MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
I laughed so hard my bf came in from the other room to see what was up and make sure I was still breathing. I suspect that saying “Haayy” to each other in a sleazy voice is gonna be our new thing.
(Our previous thing was yelling “BENJAMIN MOORE” at each other in a gravelly Brooklyn accent. Yeah, I dunno either.)
I read it as a greeting, like Haaa-aaay!
“Haayy! Is that a gun in your pocket or are you just happy to see- *bang!* -meouch!”
Paging Arthur Fonzarelli!
Did any one of you bastards bother to ASK this bobcat why he grins? Hmm?
That grin certainly made me want to paint my pants with all the colors of the wind … or something like that.
I didn’t think I needed to since I can already paint with all the colours of the wind.
This is why.
And we can all thank him.
I’m sorry, but is that Richard Simmons? I’m apologizing because if it’s not him, I don’t want to introduce him into the thread. Looks too young to be Bob “Happy Fluffy Clouds” Ross. :-\
It’s Richard immons.
So, not Richard Simmons, then?
Richard Simmons is the only guy who could possibly out-smile that dead cat.
Don’t be too sure.
I thought it was Bruce Jenner.
The Davey Jones eye twinkle is a nice touch!!
Regretsy Math strikes again. Poor Jennifer Aniston./sarcasm
I totally read that as “snarkasm.” But I guess that would be redundant.
He’s just so damn happy!
So, are those, like, cat dentures? Did all his teeth fall out? I’m wondering if I can get those for my house cats, cause they’ve got stained teeth and that’s just not natural.
Cat dentures? lol
Like Doggy Dentures, but for cats!
Those look like repurposed Billy Bob Teeth. Use ‘em for yourself on Halloween and when you get tired of ‘em, slap them into the stuffed bobcat of your choice.
I’m waiting for the bobcat with the windup chattering teeth.
Umm it looks like a domestic cat who had its poor tail cut off and was run over by a tractor.
How Dare You, I’m sure Jennifer Aniston is much nicer in person.
I do not have enough thumbs for your comment. XD
Goddamnit, I just spit this delicious beer over my keyboard.
I hope that dead cat doesn’t become a Regretsy meme. It’s total nightmare fuel, even more disturbing than Goatse. At least no one was selling that picture on Etsy! I am now going to think about soft, fluffy Hellephants.
Whineston is the nightmare.
We found the body for the Hellcat! http://www.regretsy.com/2012/02/23/hellcat/
My attempt (I was never good at math):
That vapid smile, combined with those dull, dead-doll eyes really scares me!
The bobcat, on the other hand, is kind of cute.
My god that’s derpish.
Also, someone needs to tell the Bloggess about this.
“Very nice?” Um, no…
Scary eyes? Yes.
If that’s “very nice” taxidermy I’d hate to see mediocre.
Why does this website keep featuring things I want? I can’t budget for this stuff so I’ll just admire from afar.
You probably thought this bobcat was alive. NOPE! Chuck Testa!
ZOMG IT’S GARY BUSEY CAT.
Well. If Gary Busey were happy instead of angry. But the teeth the teeth THE TEETH.
Jeez, talk about a receding gumline…
Here’s what it SHOULD look like:
Do you think the mummy cat in the Regretsy Math is reacting to Jennifer Aniston or his fellow feline’s fraudulently fanged face?
I haven’t seen a Bobcat this fucked up since “Shakes the Clown”
Thanks for the nightmare fuel.
I think if one is the sort to enjoy a good piece of taxidermy (I wouldn’t know for sure, since I am not), they would rather it smile gleefully than grimace. You know, as if to say, “It’s all good that not only was I killed, but now I am stuffed and sitting in your living room floor for eternity! No really! I enjoy the color scheme you have going on in here!”
I’m not sure whether I’m horrified or stoked that this item is in my city. If it weren’t so expensive, I’d buy it and send it to HK.
Limited edition: I ran out of wax vampire teeth and they’re not around again til Halloween.
This is why the Cheshire Cat went with human dentures – it only now makes sense!
Is that poor pussycat cross-eyed? It needs to be seen by an opthalmologist. Surely there has to be an opthalmologist specialising in dead bobcats in the local area. Also a visit to a dentist wouldn’t go astray. Maybe some braces and spectacles might make him a bit less – something. Or more.
I kind of want to make this my desktop wallpaper. Every time I look it I just smile. It would be awesome for depressing days.
This is the vibe I’m getting.
If this is their ‘Very Nice’ category of taxedermy work, I do *not* want to see their average version.
Nah, I lied. I do want to see those.
You REALLY dislike Jennifer Aniston, don’t you?
I’m not arguing with you, by the way.
This is the best Regretsy math ever. It really does look like those two combined into one freakish being!
Pretty sure that front tooth is just a chicklet.
Just noticed my avatar guy has wonky teeth – so I shouldn’t talk.
Technically, it’s wonky tooth.
Veery Nice – ‘ow muuch?
If you shoot a Bobcat in a Mushroom patch, this is bound to be the result.
“Excellent condition” must mean something totally different in taxidermy-talk.
Oooooh, apparently there’s a CrappyTaxidermy.com. FUCK YEAH.
I had to look. And now I’m sorry.
I both love you and hate you now, Rawr, which is fitting, since my reaction to CrappyTaxidermy is to alternate between wanting to laugh and scream. Occasionally I do both, which sounds sort of like a strange hiccup.
WE WERE NOT MEANT TO BE.
Say, isn’t that John Malkovich?
Thanks to Rawr the Dinosaur, I’ve just discovered my new internet obsession at crappytaxidermy.com. If I’m not back in three days, please send rum.
“Very nice” as in “Not very nice at all”?
My brother had a jackalope. When he died, that was the only thing among all his posessions that I wanted, but suddenly no one knew where it was.
I think I just woke up my room mates, I never laughed so hard at a Regretsy Math! At 7 am! You can’t buy entertainment like this for all the money in the world. <3
It’s actually got Tom Cruise-itis, what with the wonky-ass placement of the teeth in relation to the nose. Difference being, if you’re gluing in plastic teeth from Party City, you oughta be able to get it right. Ditto for the bobcat.
So this is what Dental Appliance specialists do in their spare time with the mouthguards and dentures that don’t fit. He’s never putting anything in my mouth again.
The least they could have done was centered the fucking teeth in the mouth. Jegus. At least it has the creep factor going for it.
Well, that link took a crap. Let’s try that again.
NO NOT THE CUPCAKES!
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