Sometimes, when I’m feeling a little frisky, I put on my fire costume and ask strangers to stick their weenies in me.
My first thought when I read the title of the listing.
My very last thought once I saw the execution.
I went to the midnight show in a Mockingjay tshirt, nails painted in a flame motif, and “fire” eyeshadow. I guess I just wasn’t literal enough.
I guess I just didn’t achieve enough… I went to the midnight show in a Mockingjay shirt and flaming eyes, but no flame motif.
My first thought was how could they have missed including a “Hunger Games” tag on this? I mean come on people, that’s like Etsy Marketing 101!
Fuck, that’s like how you get the entire Internet to look at your shit.
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I don’t even besoin see the “images” encore.
Many Happy Returns
–”Darfur” Diy emoticons, danke!!
I was thinking more Labyrinth Firey..
That’s exactly what I thought when I saw it.
It’s pretty much just as terrifying as the Fire Gang from the Labyrinth. And I’d like to see her pull off her own head.
Chilly down, chilly down!
YOU FUCKING ROCK! <3
I’d stick my weenie in your photoshop skills any day. This made me spit my beer. I’m logging out to lash myself Corpus Dei style right now.
That’s the best photoshop ever.
Haha, classic!! Except your not allowed to throw other peoples heads
I wish this is what I thought of when I first saw it. My first thought was – dried chile peppers??? WTH.
I thought they were colourful condoms at first. I guess balloons would be more likely. But with Etsy, you never know.
Zaria, I’m glad it wasn’t just me – I thought the same thing.
I saw peppers, too. I suppose for those that like it a li’l spicy…?
I thought the same thing… when I go to Ric Bayless’ Halloween party, this will be the most rockin’ chile ristra costume ever!
But my 10yo said, “Is that Chewbacca on fire?” Half right… that’s my boy!
You’d think she would vacuum first before listing on etsy.
not dirt…they’re stains…*shudders*
You are definitely my kind of person if that is the first thing you notice.
Frankly I’m disappointed that such a Free Spirit* would have such mundane furnishings.
She can’t. She’s too short: the “tutu bustle” is only long enough to fit a 6″ person
If you were 6 inches tall, you could wear the tutu and dance under an 18-inch-tall Stonehenge model!
Her tutu goes to eleven
Looks more like the dumpster of the Bunny Ranch…than fire.
Though I’m sure burning is involved in either case.
And then I put their weenies on a stick and have a campfire roast…
Looks like the garbage heap from “Fraggle Rock” and a firey from “Labyrinth” had a baby.
I was thinking ‘Mexican Big Bird’ personally.
My first thought was of the Ultimate Warrior. I tried emulating him has a kid–my mom got pissed when I started tying random shit to my arms and legs. (Did I just date myself?)
Did you know that he co-wrote a horrible short running pseudo-philosophical, impossible to follow comic strip called “Warrior”?
Here’s an image from the Christmas issue:
There’s no way that what looks like happened is what happened, right? Right!?!
A video review of the first issue: http://thatguywiththeglasses.com/videolinks/spoonyone/reviews/7238-warrior1
“comic book”, not “strip” (like what he did to santa…)
Wait…did he just date-rape Santa?
IDK, it could have been a consentual drunken romp that ended up with Santa passed out on the floor. Santa probably started it.
You mean there are other TiGWeTeGans on Regretsy? Awesome. That was one of my favourite crossover reviews. The Ultimate Warrior is a fucking raving lunatic!
You didn’t see my comment on the Titanic shoes the other day?
Also, did you see the later reviews of following issues? It makes a little more sense after that.
Oh, my god. I thought that was made of condoms.
That thought crossed my mind also.
I thought so at first glance. I had to look at really close to make sure it wasn’t. It wouldn’t have surprised in the least if it was made of condoms unfortunately.
Condoms come in that size?? But, no. Not condoms: somewhere a used car lot is wondering where 1200 ft of red & yellow banner ropes went.
Muppet? Fraggle? Pinata? What are we going for here?
I say pretend it’s a Pinata and beat the shit out of it with a Baseball Bat.
Will the cricket bat I’ve been saving for the zombie apocalypse do?
It already looks pretty uncomfortable. Don’t know that I want to wear it with my legs tied around my waist.
I was so hoping for a ‘shop of the model with her legs tied around her waist… I’d have a go but don’t have the attn span currently.
I would wear the shit outta this thing. No lie. just me in it.. running around shouting I’M ON FIRE!
bonus if I can get someone to go as a Fireman.
I can feel some interpretive dancing coming on…
Can I chase you around with a marshmallow on a stick?
Don’t forget to periodically stop, drop and roll.
On my mobile – it looks like a costume made of colorful condoms.
Then I thought it looked like a costume made from chile ristras.
I thought she was shilling for some fried-chicken joint.
And she’s gonna have SOME FUN ripping that tape off her girlparts [click through to other views].
At first sight I wouldn’t have guessed that someone would find a way to use tits to see this, but lo and behold!
Her eyes are up hee… oh, never mind.
Damn! Why would you wear a costume like this with a body like that? If I had that body, I’d wear slutty Halloween costumes all year! (except I go to school in Minnesota, like having amusing and unique costumes, and have a shred of dignity, but still, you get what I’m saying…)
For the lazy who don’t feel like clicking . . .
ok, now THAT is hot.
(see what I did there?)
Rushgirl, I BEG that you now buy this and dress exactly the same way at my place…say 15 minutes?
I’ll be in my bunk
I have a little voice in my head screaming PHOTOSHOP. Admittedly it screams this at every picture. Is it just me or does her arm, her head, and her body not quite match.
I think it’s just that the sleeve of the costume extends past where her arm/hand ends to attach to her waist giving that illusion. The “flames” around her waist also cover the fact that she is wearing baggy pants hanging off a full derriere on an otherwise skinny body.
I don’t see any PS trickery here
From the listing: “a women’s size 6-8 , or men’s small/med”
Just in case any men were wondering.
I don’t trust her. I’ve learned the hard way that when an outfit is modeled with exaggerated poses such as this, it’s to hide the fact that it’s a badly designed and ill-fitting outfit.
Come on…we ALL know that Bronc already bought this by now so he can wear it to next year’s Burning Man…as an armband
reminds me of those things from Labyrinth that Sarah ripped their heads off and threw them…they kept harassing her…hmm
My first thought: The Fire Gang from Labyrinth
Maybe she lost her head?
That’s who I was thinking of!!! YEAH!!
I’m so glad many of us are on the same page.
On that note, IT’S DAVID BOWIE GIF/VIDEO TIME. Oh yeah!
And maybe time to watch Labyrinth. And maybe bunk time for many of us FJLs.
I would rather be actually *on fire* than wear that. It looks like a bunch of busted balloons.
Clearly she colors her hair cause she’s a fire crotch.
well, at least it can also be worn as a jacket. with a leg belt. totally makes it worth $500.
Flame-yo sir. Flame-yo
…is she about to pass out or take a dump?
Looks to me as if she is going to lay an egg. She looks like a giant Rhode Island Red.
Is anyone else baffled by how expensive this crap is??
She looks like she’s about to lay an egg. Or a lump of coal.
This is obviously something dreamed up at Burning Man (from what I’ve been told goes on there), and if that’s true the caption holds true.
As long as we’re confessing…sometimes, when I’m feeling a little frisky, I hire a hooker to put on a Phyllis Diller wig, and hot glue used condoms all over herself. That $500 belongs to me.
I read “When I’m feeling a little frisky, I set a hooker on fire.”
I don’t judge what happens between consenting adults.
It’s all fun and games till someone ends up in the ER with second-degree burns over 70% of their body.
Hey, baby, want me to melt your marshmallows?
Okay, I could see this as a reasonable purchase if you were a member of a modern dance troupe performing some sort of dance about the elements; it would “read” well on stage.
But that’s not exactly a huge market, now, is it?
Actually the market for this type of stuff is pretty significant. It is made for the festival or rave culture. People can wear some pretty ugly costumes at Burning Man. My friend makes a living making colorful fur boots.
I used to be in charge of costumes for circus performances, and I kinda wanted this one! I’d want it more if it didn’t look like a bunch of busted balloons for $500.
It would read well on stage? Okay, I have no experience in stage theater, but my first reaction was to giggle madly at the outfit. I’m not sure my reaction would be any different were this costume presented to me in a theater setting.
Imagine a darkened stage, and then a single yellow spotlight fixed on her. I’m not saying it wouldn’t be weird, but it would be dramatic and a lot of the problems (like the condom-like quality of some of the flames) would not be visible at a distance.
I’m still giggling, but I blame that on the general goofiness of the original image, the lovely shop by gnu and that I’m an uncultured degenerate. You tried, Rana, which is what counts.
Gives new meaning to the term “firecrotch.”
I like to put this on, then stop by the firehousr to ask the local firemen to teach me how to “stop, drop, and roll”.
So happy it doubles as a jacket with sash-legs. For $500, I want my cellophane firewear to be versatile.
I thought it was supposed to be a Phoenix costume… :/
More like some fabulous brother of Carnage – an attention whoring symbiote costume that makes you strike weird poses, flail hands and break into spontaneous dance numbers.
oh look I found its mate.
You must bring us a shrubbery!
“First you must find… another shrubbery! (dramatic chord) Then, when you have found the shrubbery, you must place it here, beside this shrubbery, only slightly higher so you get a two layer effect with a little path running down the middle. (“A path! A path!”) Then, you must cut down the mightiest tree in the forrest… with… a herring!”
Those damn Fire-Benders are getting out of control.
Wasn’t this one of the puppets in Labyrinth?
The only thing I remember from Labyrinth is Ass-to-Ass girl running around and David Bowie playing with his balls.
Lol, Requiem for a Dream, that is a great movie.
Lol, Requiem for a Dream
This is the first time I have seen those words together.
I LOLed during Black Swan.
I like the scenes with the Tappy Tibbons info-commercial “Be be be excited!!!”
So this is kinda art related and I might even put it up on etsy and try to pawn it off by claiming fairies painted it, but I have to do a portrait for art class tomorrow. Have to put in a bit of effort so I want someone epic, but can’t think of anything. Anyone gots ideas?
How about April? Or Bronc? Or Petya? Or Dror… you get the idea.
Of course, then you’d have to out yourself as a FJL, but it might be worth it.
Frank N. Furter
Burt from “Blazing Saddles”
Anyone from Monty Python
This one is even ‘better.’
Because I often want to play mermaid by strapping plastic goldfish onto my boobs, and tangling my legs in basketball nets which do crazy things under blacklights.
(There’s something popping out in this photo…)
That is a definite nip slip.
I think it’s supposed to be showing what would have happened if Ponyo didn’t get out of that dredging net.
My favorite are the black light pictures. What exactly has she been doing in that costume to get those bright patches?
Would have been funnier if she used plecostomus
I love the part where she admits it’s just basketball netting… that justifies the price almost as much as “The hat is sold separately”.
It’s a chicken, I tell you! A giant chicken!
Chicken Boo, what’s the matter with you?
You don’t act like the other chickens do.
You wear a disguise To look like human guys,
But you’re not man; you’re a Chicken Boo.
That’s why I’m now craving Bojangle’s Fried Chicken.
Did anyone notice the third pic on the listing? Woo tits!
I prefer the proper medical term: teats.
Although “gazonga” would be okay in some settings.
Border Collies Herding the Sheep
it looks like it’s made of condoms.. hundreds of colourful condoms..
I hope they’re new.. if they are.
I kind of like the costume. As much as I love dressing up for Halloween, Mardi Gras and other costume holidays and events, I would never pay $500 for such a thing. Hell, I didn’t even pay $500 for my wedding dress.
I agree. I would be perfectly willing to wear the costume and follow Spandy Andy’s tight-bright train in his next flash mob. But it’s out of my price range.
Does it come with a stake?
Or a steak, for that matter.
I’m just gonna leave this vaguely related link here:
This is how it starts. Soon, our world will be like this: http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&cd=12&ved=0CDkQtwIwATgK&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DeypY1LnmiMA&ei=oAVxT8vLHOXV0QH6irHUBg&usg=AFQjCNH7yvvNv90_YZwmvww6n5NMO9nPtA
OH MY GOD!
I used to LOVE Lancelot Link!
My friends and I still do that “dance” they used to do at the end; Lance and Mata Hari
Way too stupid, yet funny
I’ve seen a poster on here named Lancelot Link Secret Pimp. I’ve only seen a few episodes. My brother and I got my dad DVDs for his birthday after he showed us one. Apparently, he watched it in high school or college (he insists he watched it to make fun of it when there was nothing else on. That, and he loves chimps acting like people).
i have to say that i bought her 70s dress w/ the birds chasing the rabbits across the clouds, so you’ve given her a sale she didnt expect, one that has nothing to do w/ the absurdity posted.
in addition to the absurdity posted, someone might also be interested in her bunny costume. even i actually love the rabbit shoulders on that [but nobody's ever accused me of having sedate taste]. i would post it but i’m beat. i did give her a heads up about how i found her.
I read that as “birds chasing the rabbis across the clouds.” Now that, I’d buy!
I, too, thought the bunny costume had merit. She has some interesting stuff…others, not so much. But then, that’s what it’s all about: different strokes and the like, eh?
That dress is adorable. Also, you appear to be her first and only sale since 2008. If I’m reading Etsy right.
Fucking burner hippys.
Added bonus: it’s super-flammable if you like it extra-fiery.
Isn’t that Chaz Michael Michaels?
I want to pour water on her.
If she’s going for Dave Matthews’ fire dancer, then this is the biggest fail I’ve seen on this site in a long, long while.
David Byrne is selling off his stage wardrobe?
The Mummer’s Parade called. They want their outfit back.
C’mon…Mummers put WAY more into their costumes…and they cost WAY more than $500 to make!
But to be fair, that’s a team captain’s costume you’ve got in that photo; they’re way more expensive and built up than the average Mummer’s costume.
I’m aware of that, just illustrating the point. Even the “average mummer” (is there such thing?) costume has considerable detail and is quite expensive
I feel a little weird about how much I want this.
Roast chicken tonight?
Maybe watch Smokey and the Bandit?
can i get a “threw me into water, but i didn’t float” costume instead?
I can’t top HK’s caption…that was gold.
At first I thought the seller’s name was rocketgyno.
I’m trying to figure out that blob of yellow tulle on the hairdryer.
So I’ll prolly have a migraine tomorrow.
Someone took the Burning Man idea a bit too literally.
I must be seriously crazy because I love this thing. I’d put it on every time I left the house.
Their one sale was a “70ies” dress. As in, “Seventy-ies”. Not “Seventies”, which one would write, logically, as 70s.
I think I’ve discovered the Etsy hippie mantra.
Also, do you think she takes her own photos with a time-delay camera, or is there someone in her life who likes exotically-colored condoms and popped water balloons as much as she does?
read it to fast and it sounds like 70 eyes….. don’t ask
Why, no, you absolutely don’t look like you’re covered in multicolored used condoms. Whatever gave you that idea?
Gala dinners are the worst. It is a #firstworldproblem of #firstworldproblems, but seriously, gala dinners are what parties would be like if fun were made illegal. Like you have your conversation and you still have to fight to keep it entertaining for the three hours you are going to be there like it’s the last conversation out of Saigon before it falls to the communists
but seriously, I want to go to a gala dinner where everyone wears this costume and makes funny poses.
I needed this costume when I was teaching my students Stop, Drop and Roll.
I’m so amused. Bless her.
I like it, for some reason.
I also feel like singing.
“They call me Heat Miser,
What ever I touch,
Starts to melt in my clutch,
I’m too much!”
Comment 49, scroll up
I’m jealous. I was in the Campfire Girls and we never had cool shit like this. Hmph.
“Can also be worn as a jacket, with legs tied around waist.”
This could be said of virtually anything made of fabric in excess of eighteen inches.
That doesn’t make it sane.
This looks like something set itself on fire, had a glitter fight, pissed Kool-Aid upwards to put out the flames, and then posed very self-consciously. In other words, entertaining.
1. Now I know what to wear for my niece’s baptism
2. I can also use this to dress up as firecrotch for halloween
3. I can take pictures of myself wearing this while making sexy poses and market it as firecrotch porn.
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