44

No, We Can’t


This post first appeared on Regretsy on January 25, 2010

Yeah, I have a question. Do you have any hats with Starsky AND Hutch?

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44 comments on No, We Can’t

  1. Kate
    February 20, 2012 at 3:34 pm

    I get a distinctly “Fred Armisen” vibe from that image.

    Thumb up Thumb down +56

    • BellyBillboard
      February 20, 2012 at 3:34 pm

      I get a “dumb donald” from Fat Albert vibe. Minus the hat, of course.
      But he’s on a hat. Mind? BLOWN!

      Thumb up Thumb down +28

      • SheleetaHam
        February 20, 2012 at 4:22 pm

        once you put it on and it gets all stretched out, it could indeed be Fat Albert.

        am i going to hell for that?

        Thumb up Thumb down +4

        • catherder
          February 20, 2012 at 11:11 pm

          Hey!Hey!Hey!

          Thumb up Thumb down +1

        • WhyMustThisBe
          February 23, 2012 at 2:50 am

          Hell!Hell!Hell!

          Thumb up Thumb down 0

    • KatP
      February 20, 2012 at 3:35 pm

      I’m getting Jerry Seinfeld + Dick Van Dyke.

      Thumb up Thumb down +26

      • Postmenopaws ™
        February 20, 2012 at 3:43 pm

        …with a hint of Ron Pearlman around the lower half.

        (I guess that’s better than the “Michelle-chin” shirt.)

        Thumb up Thumb down +6

        • landcfan
          February 20, 2012 at 6:42 pm

          Michelle-chin?

          Thumb up Thumb down +1

          • Postmenopaws ™
            February 21, 2012 at 3:24 am

            Referring to a comment I made about previous related-but-not post.

            Thumb up Thumb down +1

      • EricaVee
        February 20, 2012 at 3:52 pm

        Can someone please solve this equation using Regretsy math?

        Thumb up Thumb down +9

        • hatman
          February 21, 2012 at 5:44 am

          I have a possible solution.

          Click for larger version

          Thumb up Thumb down +16

          • Mooserepellant
            February 21, 2012 at 9:08 am

            it’s like you took this straight out of my head!

            Thumb up Thumb down +2

          • hatman
            February 21, 2012 at 9:39 am

            Fat, jealous losers think alike.

            Thumb up Thumb down +2

    • Mistletoe
      February 20, 2012 at 3:36 pm

      Did you see the “The Obama Show” skit on SNL last weekend? Fred Armisen was actually FUNNY.

      Thumb up Thumb down +10

    • FrancesBean
      March 2, 2012 at 1:56 pm

      I came to the comments to say exactly that! You fat jealous loser bastard!

      Thumb up Thumb down 0

  2. BellyBillboard
    February 20, 2012 at 3:34 pm

    Change indeed. Changed him from the President to an LSD trip. Nice work.

    Thumb up Thumb down +16

  3. OhHowMyBrainHurts
    February 20, 2012 at 3:35 pm

    Something about the face and that wave of blue and stars made me think “squirrel.”

    Thumb up Thumb down +5

  4. inmediasres
    February 20, 2012 at 3:35 pm

    Is it still a knit hat if it’s crappy fleece? Interesting “likeness” of Mr. Prez aside.

    Thumb up Thumb down +14

    • Arduinna
      February 20, 2012 at 3:45 pm

      “knit” – I do not think it means what they think it means.

      Though the likeness isn’t…TOO bad…could have been worse. At least you can tell, for the most part, who it’s supposed to be. Not amazing, but not painfully-for-the-love-of-god-who-informed-you-that-was-good-art horrific

      Thumb up Thumb down +11

      • whimsiclefucker
        February 20, 2012 at 4:00 pm

        I agree, they got the same side ear/eye out of alignment so I held my hand up to the screen, and if you took the left side & mirrored it, then the same with the right you would have two, better, portraits each with his head at different angles.

        Thumb up Thumb down +4

  5. Frankenoid
    February 20, 2012 at 3:35 pm

    He needs it to cover up his Reptilians

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  6. lemon_bombs
    February 20, 2012 at 3:38 pm

    It looks even better when it’s stretched out on your head. And when I say better, I actually mean worse.

    Thumb up Thumb down +13

    • BellyBillboard
      February 20, 2012 at 3:42 pm

      Everyone claims change is better. When it’s stretched, it’s changed, ergo…it’s better.

      Thumb up Thumb down +12

    • Beeby
      February 20, 2012 at 4:50 pm

      I’d actually like to see what that looked like stretched all to hell. t’would be quite interesting, I think.

      Thumb up Thumb down +3

  7. johnnynothumbzzz
    February 20, 2012 at 3:42 pm

    Can you say presidential jimmy hat?

    Thumb up Thumb down +5

    • Alice_Dickey
      February 20, 2012 at 4:47 pm

      OMG I had never heard that phrase before, and one night my husband went to buy condums, and the guy at the counter said, “These your jimmy hats?” I could have died. Now I refuse to call them anything else.

      Thumb up Thumb down +11

  8. IndieChic
    February 20, 2012 at 3:44 pm

    That’s not a hat, it’s a collectors edition tea cosy, featuring a drawing of the exclusive limited edition “Fourth of July stars and stripes Robert Barone teapot” from the “Everybody Loves Raymond” teapot collection. Everyone else can see the spout coming out of President Barone’s ear, right?

    I haven’t drunk that much Noilly Pratt which was the only booze in the house when I made that ill-fated decision to try to watch the last half of Twilight, have I? If I were hallucinating, it would look more like a penis, I am sure.

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

    • RevW
      February 20, 2012 at 7:34 pm

      Oh,WHEW, thank you. I also saw the tea cozy & spout and thought “He’s a little teapot? Did I forget my meds again?” Perhaps there is some bourbon under the sink…

      Thumb up Thumb down +1

      • hatman
        February 21, 2012 at 5:21 am

        Tea spout is the first thing that jumped out at me, and I was trying to figure out if there was some veiled allusion to the Tea Party.

        Hmm, maybe the stars are there to show us that he’s been clonked on the head (attacked from behind!) by the Tea Party?

        Thumb up Thumb down +1

  9. villagerswithtorches
    February 20, 2012 at 3:46 pm

    I actually like it. If I had one it would keep me a little warmer when I am sleeping on the streets at night because I don’t have a job/house/car. Is there a matching blanket I wonder?

    Thumb up Thumb down +5

  10. tardis
    February 20, 2012 at 3:48 pm

    Looks like a camel toe at the top of the hat.

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

  11. Jenna
    February 20, 2012 at 3:54 pm

    It’s black Fred Armisen!

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

  12. docleather
    February 20, 2012 at 3:55 pm

    sure it looks Like President Obama, If he had a stroke.
    But seriously, it looks more like one of the used douchenozzles from “Jersey Shore”

    Thumb up Thumb down +9

  13. whimsiclefucker
    February 20, 2012 at 3:58 pm

    I just want to be sure, before the election, that his cheek-full of chaw ain’t “none of that pussy skoal, right”?

    Thumb up Thumb down +1

  14. OldPhatMC
    February 20, 2012 at 4:04 pm

    I’m getting a strong Fred Gwynne vibe from the left side of his face (viewer’s right). AND a stroke droop.

    Thumb up Thumb down +7

  15. TheOtherLisa
    February 20, 2012 at 4:16 pm

    I never realized that Obama suffered from neurofibromatosis. Regretsy is educational!

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

  16. tiny giraffe
    February 20, 2012 at 5:13 pm

    Oh, no! The president’s Polyjuice Potion is wearing off. Once that bubbling around his chin stops, we’ll discover who he really is. I’m guessing Mundungus Fletcher.

    Thumb up Thumb down +20

  17. Howard M Beers
    February 20, 2012 at 6:32 pm

    The face is a bit too narrow but the misalignment of the ears and eyes says Alfred E. Neuman to me.

    If only Alfred E. was running for president. I can dream, can’t I?

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

  18. Zippy
    February 20, 2012 at 8:54 pm

    It looks like President O just stuffed all Ronnie’s left-over jelly beans in his mouth and suddenly has second thoughts.
    Do jelly beans go bad in 30 years?

    Thumb up Thumb down +1

  19. Petja-Herra
    February 20, 2012 at 11:57 pm

    My measured IQ is 142
    I have been reading a book, and five from the old diaries that have read all kinds of literature, psychology, politics, marketing and the history, aesthetics and communication, mathematics, and theater, ballistics, and horticulture, fiber, and learn to horse breeding, all of it for more than 3000 000 pages.
    I have seven training and I have given lectures at the Technical University, the University of Arts and the Institute of Marketing.

    But still remains the things that I find it difficult to understand.

    Like this ugly hat.

    Thumb up Thumb down +5

  20. channamasala
    February 21, 2012 at 4:38 am

    I’m going with “Mexican Jerry Seinfeld”

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

  21. Vilecat
    February 23, 2012 at 9:30 am

    Oh goodness, his face is melting!

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

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