I’m sure some people will see this and be horrified. They’ll find the idea of someone smearing menstrual blood on a necklace and selling it to be completely repulsive and unhygenic.
And to those people I would simply say this:
I guess that’s not a factor…
Very clever.. : )
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
I am going to wear this when I go camping, wrapped around my average sized penis.
It’s okay if she does. I have my cootie shot.
She doesn’t have Cooties?
Someone needs to give her some Cooties, since they are soooo fun! *blinks innocently*
If left untreated, it can progress to ants-in-the-pants.
The Cooties I had back in the day didn’t have such, uh, expressive or colorful faces.
I read that as “expressive or colorful feces”.
remember it’s circle circle dot not now you have a cooties shot
circle circle knife knife now you have it for life
Don’t forget…circle, circle, square, square, now I’ve got it everywhere!
Nibble, nibble, crunch, crunch, this makes me want to blow my lunch.
I would think anyone who would buy that would also appreciate crotch cooties shellacked onto a pendant.
This reminds me, I need to get mine.
That is just gross, there are no other words beyond Ewwwwwww that express how gross.
I just yelled “Ewwwwwwww” at my screen. Why in the hell does this artiste think anyone would want to buy this?
At the very least, most womyn would want their *own* special moon time mess on the pendant, not goo from some stranger’s vag.
Just when you think it can’t get any worse…
Fuck. I’m going to go drink a bottle of wine and try to unsee this….
I have obviously been here too long because my first thought was “Jesus what horrible penmanship.”
Yeah. I’m not sure if I’m more freaked out by the artist’s “materials” or by her crazed, deranged-looking scrawling….
I know, right? She should sell “make your own” kits.
Actually, this is great. If there’s a market for other women’s menses, there’s certainly a market for any case of crabs that I catch. I’ll just shellac the little bastards onto a pendant and say something female solidarity-y, and suggest that anyone who doesn’t buy it is playing into the whole crabs in a barrel thing (rim shot!).
Seriously, though: a woman smears her menstrual blood onto a swatch of badly cut leather that she wrote some bullshit on with a Rollerball and attached to a shit-grade base metal chain and we’re supposed to be overwhelmed with the deep feminine mystery of it? Fuck that, and fuck her.
That was my thought exactly–if you’re the sort of person who would want a menstrual blood pendant, you would want it to be your own.
Seriously. Who the hell says “Oh, my period is here. CRAFT TIME!!!!!!” Other than this loon.
When I saw this, I realised that every month I’m literally oozing gold, and I’m missing out on cashing in with it.
Jam so good, I’m jelly.
I see that Bible is the new barn wood.
I wonder the reasoning behind it, considering it appears to be a passage about judgement and destruction.
Surely there’s a passage in the bible about unclean women that would have been much more appropriate?
And the Lord Spake, “Go, my Son, out into the Nighclubs, but avoid ye the skanks, for they have the crotch rot”.
I don’t know that the passages about menstruating women would be conducive to the seller’s wombynly magickalness, considering that those verses dictate women must be outside of the camp for seven days and anything they come into contact with is unclean….
Yeah, it seems like those verses would cramp her style.
I agree, it’s rather bloated.
Yup, Leviticus 15:9. Anyone who touches her, also unclean.
I think I share sentiment with many, when I say: Fuck Leviticus.
Eh, those verses are just there so husbands won’t pressure their wives into having sex during their period anyway.
I know I feel pretty darn unclean no matter how much I bathe during that week. If I was rich I’d probably spend 20 hours of every day of that week in the tub.
Red Tide doesn’t get your clothes clean
I think that bible verse is from Cooteronomy.
It begins with Adam and Summer’s Eve.
Is that the book that comes after Eleakiel?
Similar content in Flowverbs.
My thought exactly. Gotta be King James English and aged yellowed pages though.
Bible-as-background was pure genius considering my reaction upon seeing this was ‘OH CHRIST GOD’. And I’m an atheist. True story.
*Sniff* Isn’t it nice when something brings Christians and atheists together?
I was trying to come up with some witty way to mention that. You win.
You win. I also focused on the book and thought “This is artsy. Must find my own for my steampunk Beanie Babies photoshoot.”
For me? you shouldn’t have.
No really, you shouldn’t have.
I have a habit, when wearing necklaces, of putting them in my mouth, without even noticing. I think I’ll pass on this one.
Oh, but it’s sealed!
We dont know how its been sealed. For all we know, she could have put a layer of wax or it or sprayed sone glaze on it. Its a biohazard not art.
I don’t think she has the right equipment to “spray some glaze on it.”
This gift is spot on.
The psychotic handwriting adds a certain je ne sais quoi.
It’s like poo-flinging for the red tent set.
Does je ne sais quoi mean “I wrote it with my vagina”?
If you do enough kegel exercises, anyone can write with their vagina.
I could finally start that novel I’ve meaning to work on.
And it would sell millions. But the signings would attract a questionable crowd.
Sadly, on etsy, there’ll be art for that. I think we’re gonna need another rule.
The great sacred art of Vagigraphy.
Nah, that would be je ne sais con.
Thumbs up for French puns!
LeeLoo, stop. Please stop. I can’t take it anymore. My sides hurt.
My grandpa printed like that. He wasn’t psychotic at all. *pouts*
My grandma wrote like that. She was psychotic, but I think the handwriting reflected more of her super-old-ness than any psychological disorders. She would have had to save up a jar of menstrual blood for several years after menopause in order to duplicate this gem, and I can’t imagine she was THAT crazy.
It’d be a whole barrel of crazy. One day, this person….may be a grandma. And she’s already proven she’s that bat shit. THINK ON THAT.
Poor grandkid will be a traumatized FJL of a new era.
Yeah, my mom writes kind of like that. She has tardive dyskinesia, and her hands shake. She once had very nice penmanship, but chicken scratch beats death by suicide.
I’ve worked with several hundred people with psychiatric things, and I can’t say I’ve met one who would take menstrual blood, smear it on some Crayola no-bake clay, and sell it. Bodily excretion issues generally were related to incontinence from being old. I wouldn’t be surprised if you had the occasional person acting out because the damn staff just won’t do anything about their psych hospital roommate trying to stab them with a spork, but I couldn’t blame anyone there.
Murders are often not diagnosable with any psychiatric disorder (For real). I’m going to guess that earth-mother-womyn types aren’t much different.
The 2nd thing I thought was how much it looks like my grandma’s writing! The 1st thing I thought was some exclamation of total disgust.
That writing looks like she released a chicken over it.
Did anyone else think of that Osama bin Laden tree trunk frame or whatever? The handwriting reminded me of that.
I have no words.
Clearly you had at least four.
Along with a period.
See what you did there.
And we approve.
The handwriting looks like my grandpa’s. That disturbs me.
And the bible under it. Oh yeah, I remember the passage about selling drops of menstrual blood to strangers. It was a good passage. Told us to be very weary of those with cooties.
The Old Testament passage: Jeremiah 48-49:
25The horn of Moab is cut off, and his arm is broken, saith the LORD.
26Make ye him drunken: for he magnified himself against the LORD: Moab also shall wallow in his vomit, and he also shall be in derision.
25The horn of Moab is cut off, and his arm is broken, saith the LORD.
26Make ye him drunken: for he magnified himself against the LORD: Moab also shall wallow in his vomit, and he also shall be in derision.
Which is extremely weird, as those Old Testament Dudes had a real thing about menstrual cooties
Yeah, about not letting the ladiez be around during their periods.
It’s like, for pete’s sake. Who’s going to cook for you? *chuckles*
Just to play devil’s advocate, I’m sure the ladiez didn’t want to be around them while they were on the rag, either.
Yeah, but think of the alternative. Kicked out of town with a shitload of other period ridden bitches. I don’t even like being around my best friend when we’re both on our periods, much less half the town.
One week vacation for a month? I could deal with that.
(Now to convince the boss)
On that note…what if the whole concept of the “menstrual shack” was the girl’s idea in the first place….a one week vacation every month with no men and no kids. It just sounds like it was the men’s idea because the women made them think it was It was probably party central.
Lamentations thereof- which fits perfectly with how lamentable the whole thing is.
OMG Why? No…that’s just silly of me, of course it was the voices.
FOR OUR SINS, YES! He could do anything He wanted to do.
I’d have even more respect for him if he had. Finally, a savior who really understands why i can’t give up chocolate for lent.
Why would I ever want to wear someone else’s menstrual blood around my neck? Now, if they were selling a do-it-yourself kit. . .
But then it wouldn’t be guaranteed cootie free.
I bet that Bible is thinking how it’s too old for this shit.
Are you a psycho stalker?
Are you lacking craftiness?
Well, we have the perfect gift for you to send Robert Pattinson this Valentine’s Day!
If I sent her some of my menstrual blood, could she make this custom?
Now that you mention it, I’m wondering how many other people send him blood in one form or another. Opening his mail must be a nauseating job.
I’m guessing it happens way more often than he’d like. Of course, I’m sure he’d like that amount to be none.
Then again, I don’t know the man.
I saw an interview once with him professing how much he hates Twilight (don’t hang me, morbid curiosity from the title of the interview). I can only imagine how much he must hate the fans!
It’s like something made by a six-year-old sex offender.
seriously… I know girls are having red tent parties earlier and earlier these days… but 6 years old?
The fact that you know girls are having red tent parties period (pun intended) is sad. :/ I miss the days when it was terribly embarrassing to get your period for years until you just couldn’t care less anymore.
I do too. Get off my lawn!
Hey, I don’t want any shenanigans.
I’m calling SHENANIGANS!
Now, take your ball and go play somewhere else OR I WILL TELL YOUR PARENTS AND DON’T THINK I WON’T!
*shakes cane at those hooligans*
I hate everything but Matlock! Where’s my Ovaltine?
I recall calling my mom at school, crying, asking if she could bring me clean undies and midol. I sure as hell wouldn’t have wanted to celebrate something like that.
Yeah. Also, the whole “welcome to womanhood” thing is intensely creepy unless you’re a late bloomer. I was 12. Not exactly ready for the whole sex and marriage concept.
I was ten and raised by Catholics. They made it seem like the smell of menstrual blood would attract rapists from miles around.
My mom tells me of when she got her first (back in the 40s). Her mom just handed her a sanitary belt and walked away without saying a word. She had to get her older sisters to show her what to do. She never got The Talk or anything. Ever since she’s been a big promoter of sex ed in public schools.
I remember the Sponsored By Kotex Pamphlet of Knowledge. All the facts of nature presented as a series of letters between the Growing Up Girl, her friend The Know-It-All, and their friend Girl Too Stupid To Live.
Point is, Kotex’s fine products will ease your transition to womanhood. Also the sticky side of the pad goes on your panties, not your netherskin.
Got my first one on vacation at my grandmother’s when I was 13. Mom had given me The Talk (and the handy-dandy black and white booklet explaining the whole deal) beforehand. I went into the kitchen, where Mom was ironing something, and told her. She made a bit of a fuss over me, and when my grandmother called out from the living room to ask what was going on, Mom loudly and proudly replied with “She’s a woman now!”
I don’t know which was redder, my face or my panties….
After I got my first one, my mom bought me a box of Godivas and told me to make it last, because I would need a few of those chocolates every month. No party though, and I’m relieved by that.
There are times men confound me with their irrational thinking. But one thing I can commend them on: they don’t have parties for a boy’s first ejaculation.
It’s like Rule 34, only for creepy rituals instead of porn. You’ve thought of it, so somewhere in the world, it must exist.
Something made by that other person, who lives in my head.
Obviously it isn’t just for “me.”
Am I wrong in thinking the only people who would buy this are the kind of freaks that would WANT to come in contact with the blood? She’s really shot herself in the foot, sealing it and all.
Okay, take your blurry pics, and they can be art. But a biohazard is not art.
Also, it’s icky.
I don’t think the foot’s where she’s shot herself.
I’ll bet this seller is an active member of Art by Women About Menstruation.
I just HAD to check that out, and now I can’t unsee it! Agh!!
A couple of quotes from there: “This is so much fun – why don’t more people paint with their menstrual blood?”
“…menstrual blood is very different to work with compared with paint.”
The first quote made me cringe. And people wonder why LJ comes under DDOS attacks. It should be “Anti-Creepy Bullshit” attacks instead.
Ugh, I got hit with a link to a site for a woman who painted with her menstrual blood back around 2000. It literally made me gag. I can’t look at it without it reminding me of that smell. Menstrual blood has its own odor, and it may be subtle but it’s vile. Once its on your chosen canvas, it’s going to start rotting, and I would not trust six-inch-think resin to keep that odor at bay, let alone a haphazard swab of clear nail polish.
I’ve got a very sensitive nose, so the smell of it is anything BUT subtle to me. For years, before I realized my nose was more sensitive than most, I was constantly afraid that someone could smell it on me just by standing near me. Not fun when you’re 12. x.x
Almost. I almost clicked and then that little voice in my head said, “It’s. A. Regretsy. Link. What. Do. We. Do. With. Regretsy. Links? NOTHING”
My inner voice is very pedantic sometimes.
Your inner voice and my inner voice are in perfect harmony. I’m still trying to unsee the last thing I clicked.
I consider myself relatively new here (been lurkin’ for about a year, commenting for a few months) so I haven’t yet learned to listen to that little voice in MY head when someone posts a link. I’m a sucker for it, I click away thinking, ‘Maybe THIS time it’ll be something really cool!’ How long does it take before that little voice will actually scream at you not to do it?
It all depends on your tolerance level. I’m fine with merkin (see Zoreta’s comment below), but after I don’t recall what my last straw was. I know a few that I have not clicked and will not click and will break out into a rash if I so much as type their names here.
Sometimes looking something up on Urban Dictionary is sufficient to give you the explanation without the visuals.
Oh, God, the visuals.
Yours and mine must attend the same assertiveness seminar- it’s been telling me the same thing ever since I googled ‘merkin.’
Goatse………..for me, it was goatse……*sob!*
So… is there “Art by Men About Ejaculation”?
Actually, there is a famous guy who paints with his dick. No lie. He was on Tosh.O.
I saw that! He was actually a pretty talented painter. Considering his ah, “brush”, LOL! He painted better with his penis than a lot of people (including me) can paint with their hands.
As for the drop of blood pendant – O_O wrong, on so many levels.
Here’s some art ABOUT ejaculation, although I think they use real paint:
Oh, here we go:
(various body-fluid art pieces)
I think you could purchase a visual representation of Peter North’s “art” for a rather modest sum of money.
WHAT? I’m just saying what you were ALL thinking.
Frankenoid: Most of them call it “a slow Tuesday evening” and it’s mostly performance art. Usually with no audience.
I can tell you I’m thinking about it now. I’ve got the artiste in me…..
Sometime in the future someone will wonder along that website and suddenly realise: HOLY FUCK THAT’S MY MOTHER. And Thanksgiving will be rather awkward.
*wander. I need a drink.
It’s cool. I think a lot of us are wondering right now, and by that I mean drinking.
“Last month (September 2010) I took some photos of my bloodied underwear.”
For those still unsure whether to click the link or not – apart from menstrual blood paintings there’s a grainy “first person view” photo of white period-stained undies. The person who posted this seems fascinated by the fact that her pad overflowed.
This may be the worst thing I have seen on the internet ever.
In addition to “bullshit” and “vaginas” I think you need a tag for “batshit crazy”
Or “Mentally imbalanced” or “criminally insane”?
Is this some sort of fetish thing? (probably) If so, I would think that it should be MUCH more expensive. And not sealed.
Its not a fetish. It’s making sweet love to all the gross shit that comes out of your body.
Wait.. I meant loving. In a platonic way.
I think I might wear this when I MYSELF am menstruating, just to keep people the fuck away from me. It would really save my throat from screaming “I’m on the rag and not fucking happy, do you REALLY want to talk to me?!?!” I could just hold up my pendant and they’d all flee…. ahhhhh….
I seriously just cried a little. Not sure if it was joy or fear. But there were definitely tears.
“I don’t have any diseases” Oh yes girl, you do and they have meds for that.
I just thought “cooter cooties” and it sounds to me like something you’d yell out at a “ho-down”
“Grab your partner, doe cee do (sorry), cooter cooties, there yah go.”
Mind you I’ve never been a ho-down…nor do I know much about them… I assume they occur at the end of the crop season. Perhaps when the moon is full, which miss hippy bleedy necklace would appreciate, I think.
I think it’s ‘hoe-down’ in that instance. You, know, down tools and start dancin’. What you have written is more a slip and trip hazard in the red-light district.
Ho-down is what happens when your local government doesn’t take good care of the pavements in the red-light district.
I’m so glad it hasn’t been icy this year. The city has saved millions on replacement stilettos.
The Cooter Cooty Ho-Down sounds like a fun time!
Who was the first Etsian who thought “my menstual cycle is a fucking gold mine” ?
It was thought up by a cupcake circle while they were matting each other’s dreadlocks.
I read that as “knitting each other’s dreadlocks.”
Damn it! Now I’ve given an idea to any Etsyians trolling out here.
**currently visualizing the “making of” video behind this stunning fuckery and gagging** BRB
“And I’m also squirrel mama to the famous painting squirrel Winkelhimer Smith.”
I’m not going to bother looking this up to figure out what the seller is talking about, I’m just going to bask in the sweet glow of utter fuckery.
I had to…..
The squirrel is damned cute
because what I’ve always wanted a drop of some stranger off the internet’s menstrual blood surrounded by crude penmanship on a luggage card that you found underneath the seat of the bus.
What are the laws on posting something like this? It sounds like it should be illegal.
Blood is a liquid biohazard. I reported the item to etsy as such. You can not ship blood even if its dry and “sealed” without declaring that its a biohazard.
This (http://www.cdc.gov/labstandards/pdf/vitaleqa/Poster_Shipping.pdf) is how the CDC says to ship blood spot cards. I am sure you would need to follow similar precautions when shipping a spot of menstrual blood.
The seller has not stated how the blood is sealed. For all we know it could be sealed in wax or spray on paint glaze. I doubt that the seal is sufficient to keep the seller safe.
oh wow, thanks for clearing that up! I was only confused because there are so many things like this on Etsy and I was beginning to worry that it was entirely within the law.
Shipping of (bio-)hazardous materials is to comply by the Department of Transportation’s regulations, CFR Title 49, part 171. From the clause on non-compliance:
Each person who knowingly violates a requirement of the Federal hazardous material transportation law, an order issued under Federal hazardous material transportation law, subchapter A of this chapter, or a special permit or approval issued under subchapter A or C of this chapter is liable for a civil penalty of not more than $55,000 and not less than $250 for each violation, except the maximum civil penalty is $110,000 if the violation results in death, serious illness or severe injury to any person or substantial destruction of property, and a minimum $495 civil penalty applies to a violation relating to training. When a violation is a continuing one and involves transporting of hazardous material or causing them to be transported, each day of the violation is a separate offense.
So, I have a cold and I’m on my period. Every time I cough, blood comes gushing out in a horrendous torrent. Do you think if I put a bit of canvas between my legs and cough up a lung I can sell it on Etsy for a couple hundred… and call it “Plight of the Woman” and brand it under “Feminist Art”?
That would be “Plight of the Wombyn” — and then you can sell it for $400
You don’t need Etsy for that. All you need is Rule 34.
*puts on another kettle of tea*
That’s a rhetorical question. You’re writing the copy and planning the photos as we speak, aren’t you?
Add a bit of sputum, if you can get it. It’ll drive the price up.
exactly. Include the tissues you sneezed on, and you’re in business.
Is it smeared on a milk bone? If so, my dog might like it….
I don’t care what she says, that thing is MADE OUT OF cooties! Ick!
Everything I like is either illegal, immoral or causes water retention.
If I had any free time, that would become a sampler hanging in my kitchen.
Do women really look in their underwear and think, “God dammit, I have my period this week, but to brighten this bad news what crafts can I make with this?” Like gee let me smear my finger in my bloody snatch and put it on a necklace. THAT’S A BRILLIANT IDEA AND TOTALLY NOT DISGUSTING.
I’m sorry. I’m drunk and angry.
Karen, you’re just not a devout crafter.
Yeah, you’re probably right.
And in this sense, neither am I.
1.) Why does it look like there are bubbles in the blood? Do I really want to know?
2.) She needs to learn calligraphy and something about symmetry. I’m not nearly as appalled by the menstrual blood as what I am the atrocious hand-writing that is completely wonky.
Ewwww, just fucking eewwwww! I’m the first to admit I’m the freaky hippy bitch on the forums and most of this stuff doesn’t worry me at all – - But this? This made me want to shower with bleach and throw away my computer screen! *gag*
I Regret my hysterectomy. I’ll never be a famous jewelry artist now.
This actually made my lip curl.
Makes me want to craft with my dad’s diabetes test strips.
You could sell them under the label “Kee-Tones o’ Fun!”
uhh, don’t say that too loudly…
“the whole pendant is sealed with a crackled glaze to give it a antique look”
It’s antiqued, it’s compostable wood/paper/blood, it’s upcycled…if only it had a gear stuck to it it’d be steampunk too.
Oh, and if it was Whitney Houston’s menstrual blood, it would also be Tragicrafting. FTW
Blood? Is that all you’ve got? If you you were a true artiste I’d expect to see a slice of your liver or a piece of kidney (keep the stones thanks). One of your heart valves would make a statement. Show me some real suffering for your art – to compensate for the suffering your wide eyed unsuspecting audience is now dealing with.
Maybe epilate every hair on your body and sculpt the resulting pile into a small statue of Elvis Presley? That would be about the right amount of revolting and painful for Etsy.
Not Van Gogh’s ear or anything, but Etsy ain’t the Louvre… ; )
Just wait. It takes a while to get two really good looking mucus plugs that you can work with.
I have some underpants that I was going to throw away from the staining of menstrual mishaps. Perhaps I should just make them into necklaces and thus turn trash into treasure?
Nah, stuffed squirrel costumes.
Shirls…I think you may be onto something there!
I’m gonna bes a millionaire!!!
The perfect favour for the Red Tent party bag.
I’m seeing lap quilts in your future.
Technically, this has to be shipped as biohazard material.
I’ve been a reader since the beginning, this is the only thing that has made me physically gag. Seriously, that handwriting is atrocious.
Wait, the handwriting is so atrocious that it has made you physically ill? It’s bad, yes, but there are other things here that supersede poor penmanship:
Poor us, who have to look at this
At least it’s not comic sans.
Yes, Bitch Pudding, there is THAT saving grace.
No matter how bad something is I think, “A,B,C”:
Comic Sans Serif
It’s the comic sans of handwriting.
good god almighty. gag.
so you guys delete my comment because i actually enjoy this piece?? i guess you only allow negative comments then. what crap.
That’s the spirit!
(Actually, though, many of us enjoy many of the awful things shown on Regretsy, hence the “Sold” section. Also, I have not seen – and have no personal knowledge of what happened to – your other comment.)
Huh? Enjoy it all you want, my dear. The most you can expect is to be thumbed down, if not for enjoying this then at least for lack of enjoyment of capital letters.
Comments don’t get deleted. Perhaps you didn’t click “Post Comment” or maybe your alleged comment vaporized due to a technical difficulty.
But at least you’re taking it well.
Comments can and do disappear sometimes, but not often.
Oh man. One of my proudest days will be when I made a comment so revolting that it gets taken off Regretsy. I’ve gotten my comments hidden and each time I think about how loved I am!! Seriously, how awesome is it to make my friends thumb me down?
Don’t worry about it. Keep posting and be yourself.
I was going to thumb you down for that just to show you I love you. I missed and gave it a thumbs-up. Sorry.
That’s okay…I love the thumbs ups just as much.
On Regretsy you can’t lose no matter how someone votes…it’s all awesome all the time.
Guess you weren’t commenting on the Hobo Wedding post (oh, what a day that way), or you did, but didn’t make a comment that could be deemed offensive. Can’t say I’m proud that my comment was taken down, because I certainly wasn’t aiming to offend. I forget all the details, but there was a storm o’ shite that day and we all (most, I assume) understood.
Guess we know what Hannibal Lecter’s wedding favors were.
I don’t want to buy menstrual finger painting from anyone…diseased or not.
I don’t think Hannibal Lecter gave many handouts.
“I don’t think Hannibel Lecter gave many hands out.”
There. I fixed it for you.
That’s what I meant. ; )
I know, but I’m an editor and we can’t resist tweaking.
While we’re in the vein of Lecter (hee hee)…
Know what you got if you were invited to Jeffrey Dahlmer’s for dinner and were late?
The cold shoulder.
Thanks, you’re a great audience! Don’t forget to tip your waitress and I don’t mean over the table!
My husband saw it from a distance and asked if it was a clit. I had to tell him that it was in fact menstrual blood. Apparently, “menstrual” confused him and he was briefly convinced that it was a drop of miscarriage blood.
Also. Yes, Cooties.
If you have to say so, it must be so.
You ma’am, are a cootie.
The lady protests too much…
this makes me really glad I’ve already downed a bottle of wine. Of course, downing a bottle of wine makes me really glad I’ve downed a bottle of wine too
When I saw this on Facebook, I thought it was a poorly made cooter necklace. I’ve never been so disappointed/freaked out that something wasn’t a cooter.
Pedantically, it was a cooter (past tense).
$20 for one drop? I’m flushing away a fortune every month!
You can be Mitt Ronmey and I’ll be Warren Buffet.
Role Playing? Whatevah floats yer boats…
Who the hell would take THAT deal??? The only way I’m playing Mitt Romney is if I can then go out in public and kiss a man. And I’m damn well gonna wear a convincing costume.
No, you’re thinking of Santorum. He’s the closet case. Romney is too rich to be gay, and didn’t you know, Mormons are bred to be straight.
Ahhhh, but the possibilities they’re missing out on!!! If they’d quit fighting about gay marriage, they could have multiple wives AND husbands! They could all just be one big happy family!! FREE LOVE!!!
Oh shit, the worst part is, I’m sober. Maybe I shouldn’t be.
Also, something tells me Santorum would approve of this necklace, after the whole baby thing…
if you don’t already know this, google “santorum” and check out the very first website that pops up. X-D
If it is “Just for me” why is she selling it?
And why so stingy? Why not fill up a freaking wineglass of your monthly vaginal waste, throw in some glitter and top it off with some resin to “seal” it in– maybe even just cover it with cling film and offer it up in “homemade edibles” section?
Twilight Cocktail, anyone?
I know it’s supposed to be some charm of three-woyombyn-moon-sun-nature-goddess-priestess-princess medallion of magic menstruo-power and all, but I can honestly only think of one person to whom you could viably market this:
Why have I been throwing those tampons in the toilet all week when CLEARLY I could be selling them for a profit?? All you need is some string and BAM instant pendant.
Don’t forget to put a clear coat on it first.
My word. Im a fairly liberal minded person when it comes to things like menstrual art, but even I look at this and go “GROSS! D:”
Wow. 25-cents worth of chain, clasp and particle board. I have heavy enough periods I could sell these by the container-full. No shortage of menstrual blood here.
Too bad it isn’t in the shape of a placental stain heart, otherwise they could have sold it for more. Too bad she didn’t include red glitter. Hey, if you can have glitter tears on an eagle, you can have glitter flow on a keychain.
Maybe they should sell as kits for red tent parties and the daughter can be humiliated even more by having to smear bits of bloody lining on souvenier key chains for all her guests.
Question: why menstrual blood, specifically? I mean, men and women BOTH have anuses. Why not sell hemorrhoid smearins on cardboard slips. Market them as “good luck charms.”
“Magic pendant made of nose-blood. Super magic power charm for boxers, hockey players or people who live in dry, cold climates. All hail the sacred naso-spiritual energieyes*.”
*Energies. Misspelled for god only knows what “mystical” reason.
You know not what you have unleashed.
Yeah, I probably ought not to give them any ideas.
The small thumbnail on facebook made this look like one of those jam filled cookies.
I don’t want THAT cookie.
But the Kegeler Elves have been working on those in their magical cookie factory!
Poor Kegler elves. They never manage to get past about 30 days with their “its been X days since an accident at this facility” sign. Then elf bits everywhere!
You’d think OSHA would do something about that.
Madam, I salute you.
The small pic on FB made me thing it was another bajingo crafted of sculpey.
tell me why i am looking at this while eating pizza
I had to show this to my husband…he glanced and thought, so what, its blood. Weird, but eh. Then he read the title and had to be all yelly about his disgust. So now, because I’m laughing too hard to breathe let alone talk, he’s trying to explain why “mens” blood is on a necklace to our five year old, to which in all parenting fail corrected her to say, no it’s menstruation blood. He’s now figuring out how to explain that one. This is amazing. A+ Valentine’s day.
My apologies for my first post being a teal deer in heat.
Also, did anyone see she sells paintings by her squirrel?
That whole store makes me feel like I’m on drugs. Or at least she is, some damn good ones.
The problem with today’s dependence on the Internet, with e-mail and blogs, is that too much gold may go unsaved. SAVE THIS. Make sure you save what April posted, so you don’t have to one day explain why your husband and daughter were having this exchange while you were laughing too hard to breathe.
One day, in the near future, your daughter will be at the perfect age to embarrass her parents. “Hey, Mom and Dad, remember that menstruation blood pendant?” This will most likely occur during a large holiday gathering.
The Family Circus, c. 2012!
p.s. I will be saving this, at least in an e-mail to a friend who’s not on here too often. Thank you so much!
Already happened. We skype with her grandparents and the telling of the 5 years old’s selective detail tale of lady men’s blood jewelry was shared. She is also totally terrified of “becoming a woman”.
We’re kick ass at parenting fail today.
This is what I get for not being a good wife and watching them play video games and instead amuse myself with the internetz.
All of my comments are being sent to the spam filter. I wonder why. I will try to comment one more time.
Blood is considered to be a biohazard. I dont consider it to be sealed and thus harmless. She has no clue on how to handle biohazards.
Also, its illegal to ship biohazards through regular mail. The CDC explains the correct way to ship blood spot cards here http://www.cdc.gov/labstandards/pdf/vitaleqa/Poster_Shipping.pdf. I assume that she would have to follow the same instructions to ship her biohazard “art”.
The word “haz” sets off the spam filter.
I had a friend use the LOLcat speak so much, even when she wasn’t online, that I bought her a T-shirt captioned with ‘Every Time You ‘Can H*z’, God Kills a LOLcat.’ I don’t know how much she appreciated it, though, mostly because I found ways to slowly escape from that relationship.
I hope someone gets to reporting that. Shit oughta get real for Etsy if they don’t do anything about it.
I reported it to both etsy and the Louisiana Department of Health. I hope that the DOH sees the item before etsy takes it down. I did take screenshots just incase they need them.
*blink* oh, brave new world, and SUCH people in it. *shudder* . That this shocks me, tells me I’ve yet to see it all. Oh, lawdy. First a physical version of the Erma Bombeck lounge pajama thing, and a person who huffed off the phone because “Jean pajamas” underwhelmed me… And then this. Next you’ll say its magical unicorn blood.
Happy Vaginstein’s Day.
Vaginstein? Is that like the German god of menstrual blood?
Hey, wanna know something fun about menstrual blood?
It’s not just blood, it also has plenty of mucus and bits of glandular tissue!
I am waiting for the matching mucus plug earrings. Then I’ll get the whole set.
You know those toilet-training books they have for little kids entitled “Everybody Poops’ and “Everybody Pees?” We need to write one for the cupcakes at Etsy entitled “All Woman Have Periods.” In which we stress that having a period does not make you speshul or magikal, but is simply a sign you’re capable of having kids.Millions of women all over the world do it, and honestly, no one is INTERESTED in your menstrual blood. They’re busy enough dealing with their own.
I had a partial hysterectomy when I was 22, and I can, in all honesty, say that not ONCE in the ensuing 31 years have I missed having my period.
My doctor has offered to put me on pills to permanently stop my periods and I think it might be the best idea I’ve ever heard. People who like to treat them like they are magical are either mentally ill or really, really bored.
You need to put those magic pills on little pieces of wood, cover them in sealant and sell them as abstract art. I’d nom those things with or without a glittery resin to stop the “womanly gift”.
Sorry. Impulsive reaction. Nothing personal.
The only way menstruation is magical, is if you call it a “visit from the Congratulations-you’re-not-pregnant Fairy”. (At least, that’s how I cheer myself up when the cramps are awful.)
And yeah, all I want for my 40th birthday is a hysterectomy.
Loverly juxtaposition, by the way. Punishment for sins, moab, born out of the rape of Lot. Beauteous. Couldn’t find Leviticus?
The blood drop is a real drop of human menstrual blood from my body.
Well, I’m glad it wasn’t menstrual blood from some other species from her body.
Or a drop of that Chinese factory-made “blød”. No fake menstrual blood ornamentation for me, thanks.
I’m still almost entirely sure that it’s just dried jam that fell on the instruction manual for the 1980′s blender she just bought.
House Face Palm by ~Michael-J-Caboose on deviantART
I wish I could remember that show/movie where the drag queens were collecting menstrual blood to use in the make-up. Or something disturbing like that.
Then I’d make a blingee related to this about it/this.
She didn’t say anything about there being no Tickle Bees, however.
I can’t believe that no one has mentioned that she has a copyright notice on the picture saying that she has copyrighted the design. H&M is fucked now!
H&M should steal this!
Just bought it. Don’t hate! Gonna wear it to my first day of grad school!
Things I’ve seen here on Regretsy have made me feel squeemish. Heck, some have made me want to claw my eyes out. But nothing, absolutely nothing until now, has made me literally sit here clutching my poor convulsing stomach, afraid to move lest I blow my dinner all over the keyboard.
And yes, I’m a woman, and it’s still repulsive. I don’t care if it’s natural. I don’t care if every woman does it- you still don’t flaunt it like you just queefed out a fucking rainbow. I have only been around a few individuals who had made “art” out of their own blood, and guess what? They were in a mental hospital for being SICK OUT OF THEIR FUCKING MINDS.
Seriously though, I’m shivering with nausea now. This, I don’t know how, but this manages to be more disgusting and infuriatingly sick than the baby shit “art.”
Now if my bajingo bled fucking rainbows….well then I’d try to find a way to sell that.
Whoa. Someone’s made art out of baby shit?
Not impressed. Only a drop? I have a Paraguard IUD, and I produce cups of the stuff per month.
Wow. Somebody bought it. Somebody’s getting a big surprise in their goody bag at Petja-palooza.
I’ve seen some of this seller’s other work. It’s not my cup of tea but her porcelain casting is quite nice. That ain’t an easy medium to master.
I think the shouts of BIOHAZARD are a little silly. I’m surprised Etsy allows it because we live in a weird, litigious society, but I doubt there’s any real risk. HIV dies pretty quickly and I believe hepatitis needs fairly specific conditions to live past a few days. I doubt those conditions involve shellac.
I think you may be overlooking the fact that this particular item is made out of bodily waste. A substance sloughed off as a discarded mucous membrane lining.
This is identical to sculpting with boogers, painting with snot and earwax, adding texture to a painting using eye-crust, using sebaceous oil to polish a wooden item, and several other examples I’ve become too queasy to contemplate.
In short, blood is not generally accepted as a viable artistic medium. Also, I’m guessing that since she made a big deal that it’s her personal very own blood that it has, in all probability, come from her pet shih-tsu.
I’m not overlooking that, and I never said anything about the medium. I said the BIOHAZARD!!!! stuff was a little hysterical.
I’m damn glad she sealed it with a sealant because if she’d used anything less then a sealant, I’d fear it wasn’t truly sealed.
And he came unto Gilgamesh…
Oy, fuck me sideways. Sold.
I usually browse this website on my phone and this is the second item I couldn’t bring myself to touch so I can scroll past it. What kind of fuckery is this!?
I need the blood drop in a heart-shape please.
Copy editor & illustrator parts of brain approaching total incoherence: lesbian vampire next-cubicle parting-gift menopausalmemories college-ex-bofriend strawberry all-fruit jam … help …
wow..so i was sent here via a link from the artist, and i have to say..you people are cracking me up! wanna know why? all of this talking on here about something you think is gross, or don’t like or even understand is actually just promoting the artist even more! she’s actually sold TONS of pieces using blood! and no “cooties” have been reported! LOL she actually makes some of the most awesome dolls too!(no bodily fluids included. teehee)..maybe all of you should take a walk with the rest of the world and open your minds a little, just sayin.. ;P
Wait, you mean featuring something here is actually promoting the artist and they sell stuff? I HAD NO IDEA
Jim: “That’s a unique looking new necklace you have on there Bob, what is it?”
Bob: “Oh, y’know, it’s just a drop of menstrual blood I bought from a random stranger on the internet. It’s pretty fashion forward.”
Jim: “Hmm, are you sure the Lord is ok with this jewelry choice?”
Bob: “Oh definitely, in the photo is was displayed with a page from the Bible as the background, so I’m pretty sure it’s Christianity-approved.”
Very little I see here (or any other horrid internet places I frequent) totally grosses me out…but I have to admit, I heaved a little when I saw this one.
I guess that means it’s a real winner.
Damn you Helen Killer for posting this and it selling shortly after! *Shakes Fist*
*Shakes fist* at self for being a good sport and thinking it’s funny my work is on regretsy! Especially since I enjoy the site.
It’s so nice when someone has a sense of humor and doesn’t get all offended when their work is posted on Regretsy.
On the other hand, it IS more fun when they write Regretsy an indignant email which then gets posted for us to make fun of
This IS true.I know what I do isn’t for everybody and understand it’s a little “odd” in nature.The only person that pissed me off was the one that said my dolls look like Autopsy Baby dolls which are repainted plastic.My work is original and hand made from porcelain which I fought with for years teaching myself,and my doll work is about serious subjects like child abuse.So that is the only thing that made me want to open a can of whoop ass.I think they sell cans of whoop ass on Etsy.LOL
this necklace sold today! amazing.
I feel really ashamed of myself now. Last week a clerk found a USED TAMPON in one of the library’s study rooms…I figure if a drop of cooter blood is worth $20, a whole tampon full should go for at least $150…I should have grabbed that find right away and got busy with my glue gun; instead I shrieked and thanked God it wasn’t me that found it…what an opportunity wasted. I’ll know better next time.
Shame it’s already sold… back to searching for the perfect belated Valentine’s gift. But if I wait a few more weeks, I can make my own. The boyfriend will either leave me or be thrilled!
I am seriously ready to vomit (but depending on how this goes think this could be a viable gore factor type shop.) Yikes.
I’m going to sell my bloody tampons—10c a piece? Any takers?
Why wouldn’t you want to wear the menstrual blood of a complete stranger around your neck?
“What’s that, blood?”
“Yeah. Menstrual blood, actually.”
“oh… you save that stuff?”
“No, it’s not mine.”
“Oh. So I guess it must be from someone really close to you, then?”
“Not really, it’s this lady on etsy… she sells these things online… I’ve never met her before.”
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