This post first appeared on Regretsy on February 18, 2011
It’s like a wooly eye of Sauron…
One does not simply walk into Mordor (shudder). One wears a blindfold. And noseplugs (shudder).
There were so many other perfectly valid ways to photograph this thing. The possibilities were endless, but they chose this angle, this model, this whole…situation.
I will thank the creator of the universe every day that they did. HOT.
I think this was one of the first things I saw here, after being up at 3am with a large bottle of cough syrup and much cackling.
So after this post in review of last year.
The angle. 100% You just don’t pose bikinis spread legged. Many things in life you can do, and some you just shouldn’t.
But that could explain how she got the stretchmarks, you know..if she does that pose a lot..nevermind. Thinking inside the box?? Ehh?? I’ll go now before I make any more trashy puns. (ehh??)
The stretchmarks, the flab – none of this matters. Everybody’s body is fucked up, and if it isn’t? If your body is perfect and flawless from every angle? Fuck you. Everybody hates you and you already know this. Go live on another planet with the rest of the imaginary perfect people, you fuckin’ loser.
The point is, we’ve all got our mushy spots, and our stretched out areas, and our patches of grossness. It’s fine to feel good about yourself! But DON’T spread your gooch out and stretch a piece of wool floss across it and slap it up on etsy and try to charge somebody ninety five dollars to own that piece of floss.
Sell that shit to the fetish market where it belongs, badass. You can get a lot more for it there, and you can charge EXTRA for the smell.
Er, humbly submitted, Rev. Back It On Up 13, Life Coach.
Perhaps it’s the gin…there’s a theme here with the clink of cubes, the gallon of cough syrup last year.
So I agree?? I don’t think it’s the model, cause she clearly has the confidence. But I’m just not sold on what might have been a cute (itchy) bikini (that I could never ever ever wear)
I mean it was like….”does this pose look like I am ready to receive oral sex?” “No? Okay, I’ll spread a little more, but try to keep my flesh eating bacteria out of the photo.”
But it does explain why, on my first trip to Oregon, I went to a Goa party, and a girl was dancing with no shirt on, but wearing a scarf.
What terrfifes me is that this appears to be a thong. A. Wool. Thing. Itchy asshole city. Like you said, its for the fetish market. I have to wonder if shes not just a little stoned to be so comfortable wearing this, and letting someone take pictures.
Wool. Thong. Spell corrector!
I’d go with the spell correct on this one – it’s a thing, not worthy of a real name.
I guess I will have to live on the planet with the imaginary people…
Everyone has patches of grossness….sampler…
Sure, Rev. But did they have to take the photo 8 minutes after she gave birth to a 16 pound baby boy?
Hey man. Sometimes you have to sell a wool bikini, and you have to sell it now.
I also think this may be the first thing I saw here.
Yes, I believe this was the first thing I could not un-see.
This is the photo my husband, who is not a reader, associates with Regretsy. Success?
My grandmother always said that if you show something to everyone, it isn’t special. So, my advice to the nice gal in the picture is that if she is proud of her taint, and she wants to show it to someone, show it to that group of people who might want to see it! That would be the people who, um, aren’t me — for example.
T’aint that the truth!
I think she was feeling self conscious about the belly, so she thought “If I lay back, it’ll flatten out!” but really it just spreads out and makes it look like, from a distance, there are stray pubes poking out of the bikini. And don’t even get me started about the spread-eagled pose.
She could have done a lot better.
Someone had a baby…
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
And a few cheeseburgers.
Someone had multiple babies, even.
Now think about the fact that THIS particular internet crotch-barer is raising children.
Who are probably miserably, desperately embarrassed, and just wish Mom would put some damned clothes on already.
More like someone had a Baby Elephant…
I’m not so sure. Granted…there are some flaws, real people without photoshop have those.
Anyways…the more I look…God Help Me, I did…it looks like she was laying on that blanket and kneeling on it.
Look at the texture of the blanket, now look at the “rash”. I think someone was getting their hippy freak on and this picture is post coitus.
Post coitus and then selling the aftermath?
I do not approve! I will soil my own garments thank you very much!!
OMG! I think you’re right! I see the flush there. How could this have possibly gotten worse–you found it!
Yeah, but I was thinking its a serial killer posing her, and that “rash” is post mortem. Somebody better check milk cartons.
As long she doesn’t make children’s swimwear, and photograph it the same way.
I wonder if it comes with the smell?
It’s going to be a smell you can never change the size of.
I don’t care how soft it is, wool does NOT belong anywhere near one’s crotch.
Oh, yeah?? Well, I bet I’ve got mo’ hair than you do! Maybe even ‘mo better hair…
Oh. It’s bamboo/angora. I had it in my head that this was made with Lamb’s Pride wool/mohair yarn for some reason.
Angora bikinis: like rubbing your crotch on a bunny.
Caption: Please don’t use me to cover your crotch.
Aw so cute! Is it a real bunny?
Ah, never mind, I see it now. I was looking at the spots by its nose and thinking they were eyes…
Every time a crafter thinks of using angora, a bunny commits suicide.
Maybe the wool on her crotch is the reason for the unexplained red splotches on her legs . . or maybe she’s been there so long she’s decaying, hence the mushrooms growing up around her.
I thought maybe the yeast infection had spread to her ankles. Eww!
From the Body Farm’s new swimwear line.
I’m giving her the benefit of the doubt and assuming its from sitting on the crocheted blanket at some strange angle. Not as strange as the angle the cameraman has found, though.
I have taken pictures just as (or perhaps less) flattering as this, and I find myself arousingly attractive. The camera is a poor substitute for human perception. And I’m sure she looks nice when conscious!
And even if its eczema, that’s not so bad, just a lot of extra skin cells. And if you do think it is so bad, then its time for a personal inventory, asshole. We are all disgusting, nauseating creatures.
tl;dr: everybody’s shit stinks!
You said it!!! I just read that and got itchy all over. I’m allergic to wool, so I’m guessing my crotch would feel…. about the same as hers, from the looks of her, but for totally different reasons.
Not so much “curve hugging” as “clinging on for dear life. . .”
…. why? this angle? I need eye bleach.
Yes! Eye bleach all around – first two rounds are on HK!
I read that as “Yeast! Eye bleach all around…”. Which would probably also apply…
Oh eye bleach will never remove the memory of this image. We need brain bleach. Lots & lots of brain bleach.
Eye bleach and a wire brush to scrub our eyes with.
Believe me. I tried eye bleach the first time around and I clearly remember this when it was originally posted. You need to get a Stage III brain shave to even begin deleting this.
I REALLY hope she’s not selling the one she’s modelling.
I have to assume it’s OOAK. Does she look like the sort of person who has the initiative to make more than one? So yes, the smell is included, no extra charge.
o/~ I know what my Regretsy Secret Stupid Cupid is getting for Valentine’s Day! o/~
VD swap, indeed.
surely the last thing you want to go bathing in is a woolen bikini?
About the time it gets soggy and heavy, and slides right off…then you get arrested for indecent exposure. Fun times!
Looks like an ad for American Apparel.
No, this woman has eaten in the last 6 months.
OH MY GOD.
I CAN NOT UNSEE WHAT HAS BEEN SEEN.
Tummy… situation aside, why the hell does the model’s knees and shins look like she was kneeling on that blanket for a significant amount of time prior to taking this picture…?
I was actually thinking that it looked more like she suffered from a lot of flea bites…
After the oh-so-smooth belly, my eyes were drawn to what look like sock-marks on her ankles, of all things.
What makes you think it was a blanket, as opposed to the alley behind a bar or some other exotic locale?
Or eczema. Un-savory!
Oh, God, don’t make me go look at it again to see what you’re talking about.
The obvious answer to your question increases the ick factor of that bikini by at least an order of magnitude.
the worst belly button
welcome to post-pregnancy hell. Hate to admit it but mine is more similar to dead, insane hippie’s up there than Heidi Klum’s.
With the exception of a c-section scar from our first, my ex’s is still pretty nice, but she slathered on cocoa butter and mederma every day to avoid looking like the above model…
which has to do with genetics and nothing to do with mederma and cocoa butter; topical stuff doesn’t go anywhere near the layers of skin that tear to create stretch marks.
My second child was a 10 lb. 13 oz. baby boy, and starting at around 7 months, people were asking if I were due any day now. And then if I was having twins. I was ENORMOUS.
Now, I still have a bit of weight on, but my stretch marks have faded away to almost nothing, and my belly button looks pretty normal.
Did I slather anything on my belly? HELL, NO. I’ve researched this enough (about 5 minutes) to know that science doesn’t back that shit up. You get what you get and there’s not much you can do about it. I’m just fortunate enough to have decent skin genes.
Y’know..stretchmarks aside…I’m far more worriec about the rash.
However. After donning my glasses, I believe a case can be made for the blanket rash.
IT STILL GOT POSTED. It’s not an oops. It was put up on purpose.
Yes, but you’re not posting photographs of yours. Mine isn’t anything to brag about, but again, I’m not posting photographs of it. Post the photograph and unfortunately one opens one’s self up to judgment.
And apparently from said photo we can ascertain she has no issues “opening herself up” one darn bit.
Just when I thought it was safe to go back in the water…..
Actually a little bit of water would do her some good. Esp if you add some soap, a really good scrub brush, a razor and maybe some Lithium.
Hillbilly bajingo wash. ‘Nuff said.
Gods I hope she used it…
Actually, upon bringing myself to closely inspect the bottom of that doiley-edged triangle, I’d say it looks like she’s had success with a razor so far (or perhaps wax). A way better job than I’ve ever seemed to manage.
You know, that’s just wrong on so many levels…I’m getting a headache from trying to close my eyes so tightly they popped back into my head.
This looks to me like something from CSI
Corchet Something Inconceivable?
Crochet, even. Typing with my eyes closed is hard.
Corchet: A crocheted corsage?
some of them aren’t bad… nothing I can see someone actually wearing, but as an accent piece… or thread crochet…
You keep using that word. I don’t think it means what you think it means.
I was watching am episode of L&O SVU with Wallace Shawn in as I wrote that: it has come full circle!
I was thinking “L.A. Noire.”
I have so many questions about this.
What is she lying on?
How did the conversation go where this pose was the end result?
Is THIS BIKINI the one I’ll receive if I order it?
Why isn’t she standing? Wouldn’t that give a better idea of how the set fits?
…the model is blind, right? That’s the only logical explanation I can think of for allowing such an unflattering picture to go on the internet for the whole world to see.
you forgot to ask WHY.
Given the apparent stretch marks and such on the tummy, I’m not really sure I want to see her upright. It might be an ugly fight between gravity and some flimsy yarn…
I remember when this first ran and the original listing was still up.
1. Looks like a dark blue afghan.
3. No. It was a sample.
5. This was just an incredibly unflattering picture. She’s actually quite pretty. Even with the dreadlocks.
So I ask again: Why??? Is it a celebration of stretch marks? Mazel tov for the baby which I assume was a natural birth, but for heaven’s sake . . . Is it a cry for help for a nasty case of contact dermatitis? Is this supposed to be a celebration of womynhood or however the heck they spell it? I just don’t get it.
This image has me feeling that my recent birthday has put me into a whole other generation.
If only she’d chosen to model for us from UNDERNEATH the wool blanket.
I think she needs a dab of ointment on that rash . . . and, well, everything else too.
I could use a dab for my eyes…
Ok, she has inspired me. I am now going to give up knitting, crocheting and my bikini modeling.
I read that as “For” your bikini modeling…
I was all like “Pics, or it didn’t happen.”
We should be so lucky.
I can’t believe that thing isn’t struggling to get away. It’s like it’s given up all hope.
I’m still not convinced this is a woman.
Well, she’s clearly had a baby and there is no penis, so…
Lipo and SRS?
If she had SRS, she would be a woman. And her stomach has loose skin, not extra fat, so I’m not sure how lipo would help.
The problem with this picture is that it’s so very, very clear that there’s no penis.
Yup, no weenis.
Hurr durr every woman who doesn’t fit my narrow idea of beauty is a dude!
Mind if we make out just a little?
Did the model sign off on this? I want to see the shots they rejected!
At first I read that as shots they injected and thought “Yeah, roofies, sedatives, that explains the photo, and why she let it be posted. Poor lady was unconscious the whole time.”
That was my thought also, passed out model. Unaware this photo exists. It’s the only explanation I can wrap my brain around. Because I, while normally a pacifist, would SERIOUSLY hurt someone who attempted to take a similar picture of me, much less posted it online.
10/10 Would bang
Does the dead hooker come free with purchase?
I believe that everyone should love themselves and their bodies, but this is just terrible photography and marketing.
That was supposed to be attached to #24, not this one.
Can anyone do a close-up of her nostrils? I think I see something in there, but I can’t be sure.
Holy fucking shit. This is what i look like when i pass out after eating too much cheese.
I think we all look like this after consuming too much of anything. But, we don’t hurt other humans by taking pictures of it and then posting them on etsy. It’s called being courteous.
Okay, I realize that I was a bit sheltered in my own upbringing, but is there some subculture I am unaware of that actually encourages people to try to be as filthy as possible — and where something like this might actually be seen as attractive? Really now: A rash as a featured element of a marketing image?? And a basic lack of hygiene?? I’m trying as hard as I can here, people, but just don’t see this as “aspirational.” Can someone help me here?? Who are these people? And just WHY??
They’re called “hippies.”
I’m a happy, clean hippie. I use sandalwood soap and comb my hair and my skin is clear! However, I prefer cotton on my nethers AND NO ONE NEEDS TO SEE MY COOCH.
The only way this would have been worse is if she was doing a downward-facing dog and facing the same direction.
I’m not seeing a lack of hygiene. I’m seeing… all sorts of other things, but not that.
That could be me judging harshly, but you have to admit it is difficult to be kind. And I’m trying.
Hate to say it, but some of us just have that pasty, grayish skin tone. Of course, many of us have stretch marks, as well, and there’s nothing wrong with that, but it doesn’t make a modeling career a great idea.
almost needs more croch.. -shudders-
The sheer… convolutedness? Horrificity? Trauma-inducing things going on in this picture? It made me create an account simply so I could say this – “I may never sleep again for fear that when I close my eyes, this is what I will see.”
Her hand looks like she had a fist fight just before someone knocked her out, dressed her in their hand-crafted finery, and snapped the pic for Etsy.
That aside, who the hell shaves their snatch but not their pits? Well, not her left pit, anyway. The other one might be shaved.
Perfect for the dead hooker in your life.
That phrase should be employed in marketing as often as possible!
I wish we had the other pics from the listing. If I remember correctly (and I wish I couldnt remember at all) there was one of her kneeling and it was a shot of her from the back and the bottoms of her feet look like she just strolled through a lake of dog shit. it was a glamour shot to be sure.
Good lord, Justin Hawkins has let himself go.
isn’t this the end shot of the opening bit of Law & Order SVU.
Or from the newest addition to the franchise: Law and Order: Fashion Police?
I would watch that, so much.
Starring Tim Gunn, natch.
I remember seeing this last February when I was newly pregnant and being SHITSCARED that I would look like this in a crochet bikini too
I’m pleased to report that there is no mandatory requirement by the UK Government to wear a crochet bikini once you’ve had a baby.
is this an ad for rohypnol?
clearly someone drugged her to take this picture
Bamboo/wool? So extra-absorbant then? Yay…extra eau de snatch from a perfect and terrifying stranger! Only $95?
Angora’s not wool.
Actually, it is. Wool isn’t just from sheep. It’s kind of a catch-all term.
Ah ha, it’s angora AND wool. Weird. So now it’s extra hairy.
She looks like a woman with a normal body. It’s not perfect, but it’s REAL. I agree that the pose is unflattering and the angle is weird-which is what this should be about, not criticizing her body.
She must be proud of her body and there’s no reason why she shouldn’t be.
Besides the pose being unflattering, the article which we must presume we would get has been up her bum and on her crotch. Gross.
This bikini wasn’t the one for sale.
Yay for her!! Be proud of your body! But don’t photograph it and put it on the web! I have stretch marks, saggy bits, hair that has gone too long between waxings, and the odd rash from time to time, but I don’t put it out there to be judged — as she has!! I keep it to myself and a pair of very thick sweatpants. We should all be proud of our bodies, but just Hell . . . No . . .
I don’t see what’s so horrible about posting it online. If she’s happy with her body, then why not? People who don’t like seeing it can look away. Hell, I don’t like looking at rail-thin models with their ribs sticking out, but I wouldn’t suggest that they should be ashamed to post their pictures. Different people find different things attractive. *shrug*
Of course, when you have a product to sell, you do need to be aware of what your audience is likely to find appealing (or not). Which is where she’s missed the mark.
When you do see those rail thin models you probably make the same kind of judgements as everyone here has. You don’t think they should be ashamed but you clearly don’t like the way they look. I don’t think this woman should be ashamed but I also think I have every right to find her less physically appealing than the scum soaked hair in my shower drain.
I see nothing wrong with a non-model body in a normal, not taintastic pose. If I was selling bikinis, I would have no problem taking a photo in one, in some sort of standing pose, making it clear it was my own, personal bikini, not yours. And I’d find consider anyone making fun of my saddlebags or my little bit of tummy pretty goddamn petty.
Free speech = you’re free to be a dick = I’m also free to call you a total dick.
I wish that I had more thumbs to give you!
Hillbilly bajingo wash. She needs it.
Ever see “That’s My Bush”?
The rash ::shudder::. Should someone with a possibly contagious rash actually be wearing an intimate piece of clothing? Y’know, besides the fact that the butt floss is so far up her crotch and butt.
The “rash” in question looks a bit like eczema…which isn’t contagious. But it is extremely fucking painful.
are those weird mushrooms growing beside the blanket? top right.
Some kinda random fungus reclaiming the crochet….
Are we sure she’s modeling the bikini on purpose? Maybe the seller just found this unconscious woman, slapped the thing on her and took a picture before she woke up.
Not so cute that it comes pre-seasoned with taint funk.
“Pre-seasoned with taint funk!”
That sounds like a slogan on some Paula Deen packaged beef product . . . from hell.
Oh god, the mental image :O
I hope it doesn’t come with a creamy sauce…
sampler or it didn’t happen
I am tempted to start a musichall/skiffle/electronica band now and call it “Taint Funk.”
You will receive royalties, of course.
How exciting =D
It does have a great ring to it.
I imagine a crocheted bikini would absorb a lot of liquid. I don’t think that’s the point of a bathing suit…
I’m not sure that “bathing” is a part of this marketing strategy.
By the way, if you want some classic Regretsy commenters entertainment, here’s the original post, with 223 comments.
This was my inauguaral regretsy post, I believe. And it’s been like a train wreck since, I just can’t look away.
Compared to back then we’ve become significantly less insulting. Look at all the comments that were thumbed down!
oh no I’m just asking for it aren’t I
This should come in a package deal with the hillbilly bajingo wash. *shudder*
I really do not know which is more disgusting..her eczema on her legs, the saggy skin stomach, or her spread legs.
A little modesty goes a long way.
That rash looks like psoriasis. And I think a little Photoshop is in order here.
oh, i had a child, and my tum looks like this, +about 30lbs.
and i’m only 22.
worth it though, in light of the kick-ass young sith lord i’m training, so bitches can be jealous.
This post made me search “crochet bikinis” on Etsy.
Whyyyy just why!
They’re impractical and look awful ;<
Holy hell, twenty-one pages of ‘em!
I’ve seen some truly “vintage” ones from the sixties. I think they were more for sun-bathing and looking “pretty”.
Some really are pretty. But you don’t make them out of wool. You don’t make them a thong. And you certainly don’t pose in one spread-eagled and unconscious.
Ack! She has poison ivy on her legs!
Yes, we’re looking at your genitals. There, you have attention. Are you happy now?
1) Inedible fungi by the edge of the blanket.
2) Crochet grandma squares blanket.
3) Model with stretch marks and post pregnancy orange peel skin on stomach (I know because I have that too)
4) Tattoo around ankle.
5) White body, white arms, tanned calves, which means outdoor enough to get a tan and wearing shorts, but cold enough that you have to wear long sleeves.
6) Poorly composed “artistic”shot up the jacksie.
7) Item for sale made with “natural” fibers.
8) Mustache shadow on the upper lip.
I can deduce that the seller must be from Seattle.
Your douchebaggy deducing is wrong. This seller is actually from Pasadena and not Seattle.
Same [west/left/wrong] coast. Sometimes I’m glad I live on the other side of the country.
Few things I hate as much as pity.
And this makes me pity.
My vibrator lost it’s erection…..
Apropos of nothing other than the above (as per usual) did you know you can’t find the small eye wash kits anymore? They have them at specialty pharmacies, but not at Walgreens/CVS/Meijer/Rite-Aid/Etc.
I know this because I spent 4 hours (F.O.U.R. H.O.U.R.S.) driving around using 1.25 eyes trying for find one a few weeks ago. The chunk of polymer shavings fell out of my eye and all was well as I was arriving home with the kit. (Figures).
The lesson? Get one before you need it, ’cause ain’ nobody gots ‘em anymore. This has been a Public Service Announcement.
Is this OOAK? Because I want the one that WASN’T in some person’s ass crack already. Can I pay extra for that?
Not many things are great the second time around but this one sure is!
My eyes gravitate toward the fungi sprouting around her head, and I wonder if she’s tripping on ‘shrooms or simply dead from toadstool poisoning.
That definitely is an unflattering pose. I’m OK with her body; believe me, I’ve seen “worse” on the burlesque stage that those ladies carry off because they’re confident and sassy. But yeah, that angle is just sooooo bad.
If it got wet, would it shrink?
I am asking about the wool, get out of the gutter!
OMG does that actually help sell stuff? Sheesh.
Somebody else took this picture of her…WHAT?! I’d be horrified. and like everyone’s saying, we aren’t that concerned about the condition of her body. It’s everything else. You don’t pose like this. ya just dont. This would be okay in porno (maybe) if she was propped up on her elbows and not on etsy.
is this regretsy or criminal minds. she’s laid out like a crime scene. I wonder if Dr Reid would think the pose shows remorse.
She told me she was making Potholders.
Holy shit, I’d need like five of those bikini tops to cover my boobs.
You guys probably think I’m joking.
I don’t. I doubt there’s enough wool in the entire state of Iowa to properly cover my boobs. Of course, even if I weren’t top heavy with stretch marks from having given birth to twins (33-years ago), I’d never consider wearing a crocheted bikini, so I’m home free!
I’m with you. I’d have much more luck with the afghan. That bikini top would be poorly spaced pasties, that’s about it.
Post some photos so we help with the planning and estimating
If you’re ever feeling down on yourself, just remember all models in magazines are photoshopped, and photoshop can make anything look better. (Though I still wouldn’t want to buy this bikini!)
You gave her a tummy tuck and made her skin pretty! This is surely a miracle.
Here’s an eye-opening link to a bunch of celebrity before-and-after shots: http://10steps.sg/inspirations/artworks/40-cool-before-and-after-photo-retouching-photos/
Wow, that is crazy! Makes me hate the entertainment industry even more.
Fascinating. Thanks for this!
This edition of the photo puts in focus what it is that grosses me out about the listing:
It’s itchy, wooly butt-floss and I’M STARING UP HER COOCH.
And she looks drugged.
Or recently deceased.
Like I said. Probably from Seattle.
You forgot the true tricks of the trade. Grapefruit sized waists and giraffe necks. And that’s just for the average adds, a shitty clone stamp job to make her breasts bigger is what you need to get into Vogue.
Stupid marketing industry grumble grumble rant
Is that considered Level 5 work?
CCS, you put the “not nearly as disgusting” into “Ewwww” by doin’ what you did.
Saving eyesight with Photoshop!
You may think this woman has flaws, but she’s had a great bikini wax and it shows. This picture was taken at a very unfortunate angle, that’s too bad.
Imagine Barbra Streisand and Robert Redford walking down the beach …… the music swells ….
Memories, of wool patch cover’d vagine
Musty beavis scented memories but no signs of fur.
Etsy pictures of the smiles from her behind.
smiles we dare not show to others, but at least no fur.
Can it be that she’s a simpleton
who shows off her babby lines?
If she had the chance to cover up
Ba-jing-oes may be beautiful and yet
no one wants to see an-oth-ers
with obvious old sweat
So its the skank factor
that we’ll remember
Whenever we remember
But at least, no fur.
There is nothing I can do to unsee that; thanks Regretsy…
And I understand about being proud of your work and loving your body the way it is, but for something your selling, dear god, don’t wear it in the photo!
And this looks slightly less uncomfortable then the mens hemp thong thing that was on here a month or so ago…I really hope that comment brought back more horrific memories for all of you to enjoy. ;p
We really are the gift that keeps on giving for each other!
You know, the picture didn’t have be reposted. It is still freshly seared on my retinas from the first time.
ANGORA in a thong? WTF. I don’t care how soft it is, that stuff ALWAYS starts to itch.
Medal of bravery to that model. Back to composition class, photographer. And really, she looked normal (just an awkward pose) without the Photoshop, but wow, can I get a Photoshop every morning?
I’m wondering what happens if you swim in it, because wool being what it is, I can see it sucking up half the lake, and settling into a comfy position just below the knee.
I got passion in my pants and i aint afraid to show it…..i’m sexy and i know it
Dear lord…my eyes, my eyes
Someone needs a lock on their crochet hook. And their camera. Probably a lock with a built-in breathalyzer.
Oh my fucking bajingo.
This made me flash back to the scene in “Wolf Creek” where all the belongings are being stored.
Photographer commentary: “Here is this candid photo I took of a random woman passed out, probably at a summer concert somewhere. I will sell you her clothing when I am finished with her; this price reflects the cost of dry-cleaning my own clothing for that day.”
I’M SORRY, WORLD, FOR HAVING SUCH A FUCKED UP BRAIN.
Anything that makes you think of Wolf Creek can’t be good.
I can just imagine the lister looking at the photos, trying to pick the right one. “Yeah, that one is perfect!”
I shudder to think of the ones that weren’t used.
There are just certain body types that shouldn’t wear bikinis and there are certain poses that shouldn’t be used whilst wearing a bikini. The seller managed to find both.
That pose should not be used wearing anything but a medical gown or a neglige. If you aren’t having sex, a baby, or a medical procedure, just DON”T.
Foley catheter, no problem, other than my knees aching from kneeling next to her. Can we move her to the picnic table next time?
Because what sounds really comfortable is Crochet Wool up my ass crack…
This is the nightmare that keeps on giving.
Looking at this picture, all I could think about was: that rash looks painful, she should put some ointment on it.
Wait, that’s a woman?
Kept thinking it was just an unfortunate dude.
I’m sure there could have been a better pose for this…
In addition, I believe I’m the first person to notice just how masculine her hands are…
Why? Because she doesn’t have any nail polish on?
Nope, I’m not seeing it.
Wow, I didn’t think it was possible for me to be MORE gay, but after seeing that…..yup…even gayer now.
This was one of the first things I saw on Regretsy! Even after nearly a year around here–which I thought had hardened me to any unspeakable horror I might see–it still gives me shudders and eye twitches. Ugh.
For real? Did I just read this whole slew of contents making fun of her looks? LAME. The pic is atrocious. The wool thong is creepy. The idea of getting this pre-worn model makes me vurp. It does look like a staged scene for the kind of people who get off on crime scene photos. But for FUCK’S SAKE, why all he “hurr durr, its a dude” and “lol fatty fat fatty”???
Seriously irritating me too. Bad judgement and photography? Fuck yes. But what the fuck is wrong with her wearing a swimsuit if she wants to?
That’s a dude…
Wow. This is pretty much the worst possible lighting/position/angle to show this person in. I shudder to think of the photos they put in the “reject” pile that they decided to go with this one.
My immediate thought was “Holy Christ!”, but I guess “Sweet Jesus” does just as well.
I shudder to think what’s under that Angora/Wool mix…
What has been seen cannot be unseen. There was a perfectly “lovely” post above this. Why did I have to scroll down?!
This woman should have used a milk jug model.
She makes a compelling case for male homosexuality.
welp… at least she waxed…
No thanks, though. That thing’s been way closer to someone’s nether-regions than is acceptable for products that I buy.
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