My Fiverr Valentine: Day 4
All this week, we’re showcasing Valentine gift suggestions from Fiverr.com, the place where people go to do incredibly stupid shit for $5.
Last night, we featured Old Bitty Grandma, who gave us a very Etsy Valentine, complete with cupcake and mustache on a stick.
Tonight, we’ve got a fantastic “Regretsy Loves You” video Valentine card, created for just $5 by lizzyl21.
FROM ME TO YOU, BITCHES
- Click here to get your own custom I Love You video card
January 26, 2012 at 7:01 pm
awwww, warms the depths of my snarky heart…
January 27, 2012 at 5:10 am
definitely did something to the cock…les of my heart…
January 26, 2012 at 7:03 pm
I think a little glitter tear just fell from my eye… *sniff
I LOVE YOU GUYS!!!
*sobs*
January 26, 2012 at 7:03 pm
::Brushes away a tear::
Oh wait, no, that was just some cat saliva from when my kitty head-butted me earlier.
January 26, 2012 at 7:07 pm
I was hanging in there okay until the turkey skants guy showed up and I just burst into gross sobbing. Hold me?
January 26, 2012 at 7:50 pm
I love turkey skants guy. And I’ll hold you but I WILL touch your boobs. Price of admission, sweetheart. (Picture finger pistols and a wink. For a woman, I really am a pervy old man.)0
January 26, 2012 at 9:07 pm
That’s convenient because I love having my boobs touched, especially by pervy women.
For the record, they’re real and they’re FABULOUS.
January 26, 2012 at 9:57 pm
Pics or it didn’t happen!
January 26, 2012 at 10:10 pm
I hear this is where we go to touch nice boobs?
January 27, 2012 at 3:05 am
Not sure BadMiya, but judging from the queue of pervy looking people at the door I’d say it’s either a “fabulous boobs grope fest” or a try-before-you-buy sex toy sale. I’m happy either way.
January 27, 2012 at 8:25 am
WAit wait wait….
There are TRY before you buy sex toy parties???
Where are they…and how can I get to one?
I always just thought those were called orgies…
January 26, 2012 at 9:14 pm
That’s the point I burst into something, too, but it wasn’t sobbing.
January 26, 2012 at 7:14 pm
Oh God, that smashed violin. I still can’t handle seeing that picture.
January 28, 2012 at 5:09 pm
I’ve been waiting for an update on that violin situation. Did I miss it somehow?
January 26, 2012 at 7:20 pm
Was that Vonda Shepard? I hope so because it might make me as skinny as Calista Flockheart. (Or at least as trim as the dancing baby.)
January 26, 2012 at 7:22 pm
Either way I’m snuffling.
January 26, 2012 at 7:23 pm
Every day I’m snufflin.
January 26, 2012 at 7:21 pm
I wish I had this much love in my marriage.
January 26, 2012 at 7:52 pm
It wouldn’t be marriage then.
January 26, 2012 at 8:05 pm
Maybe in Utah?
January 26, 2012 at 7:22 pm
*swept off her feet*
January 26, 2012 at 7:23 pm
Oh, the skants guy. I can’t stand it, I laughed so hard, then I started crying when I saw the violin.
January 26, 2012 at 8:33 pm
No Sad Hipster?
Oh, that’s why he is still sad, I guess.
January 26, 2012 at 7:30 pm
Thank you, HKpril…that made me a little faclempt!! Discuss!!!! <3
January 26, 2012 at 7:53 pm
HKpril…is that the new anti-depressant my doctor was telling me about?
January 26, 2012 at 8:20 pm
It worked for me!
January 26, 2012 at 7:34 pm
I’m just about certain that that is the best Valentine I’m going to get this year.
January 26, 2012 at 7:47 pm
Where the hell did this song come form? The lyrics are just about as coherent as Satortia’s interview.
January 26, 2012 at 7:52 pm
That was very sweet. It made me happy and sentimental…all the good times. That poor violin.
January 26, 2012 at 7:59 pm
On a side note, whatever happened with the violin? Did the seller see any justice?
January 26, 2012 at 8:01 pm
I doubt it. She freaked out about all the media attention and decided not to comment on it anymore. I’m sure that without the public pressure, Paypal did jack shit.
January 26, 2012 at 8:07 pm
well that sucks some major donkey balls. thats too bad. would have been nice to see Paypal take it in the ass, dry and hard, one more time
Is it wrong that I am giggling b/c April responded directly to me? I have no life and it all has to be downhill from here.
January 26, 2012 at 8:31 pm
I could be all cool and say that it is wrong…but it isn’t wrong. I giggle when anyone responds to me in a way that doesn’t involve anger or looking down on me. I have no life as well…
January 26, 2012 at 8:36 pm
Does this count?
January 26, 2012 at 8:04 pm
I’m all verklempt. You people do that to me.
January 26, 2012 at 8:07 pm
I <3 you guys with big glittery copyrighted eagle tears!
January 26, 2012 at 8:38 pm
Did the $5 run out after 1min 14sec so she just faded out mid sentence? She had the meter running.
January 26, 2012 at 9:06 pm
I want one of those giant velvety rose petals to put over my head.
January 26, 2012 at 9:44 pm
More Valentines need Beaver in them.
January 26, 2012 at 10:11 pm
Enough wine..and all valentines can have beaver involved.
January 26, 2012 at 10:22 pm
You need to get more Canadian Valentines, eh?
January 26, 2012 at 10:11 pm
*sniffs*
HK…you are so sweet. And I swear that pic with the flip flop on your head makes me giggle every damn time.
January 26, 2012 at 10:22 pm
I’m sure this is the only Valentine’s Card I will get. Thanks! CF4L FJLs!
January 26, 2012 at 10:23 pm
Yet another Fivver that was scripted by HKpril or someone with a sublime insight into The Fuckery Ala Regretsy. Which is it, I must know!
January 26, 2012 at 10:46 pm
needs more cowbell.
January 26, 2012 at 10:46 pm
Spandy Andy is still my favorite. But, all the same, I love you for blowing $25 on this crap this week, April. Science bless you.
January 27, 2012 at 12:12 am
This would make a wonderful tv commercial for Regretsy…if you took out the song and just had a whole bunch of SCREAMING.
(Sorry, head is still throbbing from an evening of JCPenney commercials. This video is seriously sweet.)
January 27, 2012 at 7:46 am
or replace it with the cheers theme, but with some “changes”
(I’m 20 and even I know that theme) >.<
January 27, 2012 at 4:27 am
The production values were too high, for the first three seconds I was like “WTF it’s starting with an ad?”
January 27, 2012 at 6:27 am
That was exactly my first thought!
January 27, 2012 at 11:14 am
Me too!
January 27, 2012 at 6:27 am
As this started, listening to the lyrics, I thought it was going to say:
Here’s how the story goes
One day you find your nose…
I haven’t even started drinking yet
January 27, 2012 at 7:44 am
Brought tears to my eyes, and then it ended in the middle of the song and I thought WTF I didn’t get to finish my sentimentality!! BUTTHURT
January 27, 2012 at 5:32 pm
that framed portrait of admiral ackbar made this a magical experience for me <3
January 28, 2012 at 4:05 pm
I heart this so hard. Fuckery that also feels romantic. It’s like April just twirled me in her arms… though I’m sure that would somehow lead to being twirled into a vat of glitter & choking to death.