“THUMBS DOWN ASSHOLE!”
It’s funny because you, too!
No offense, though. You just seem kind of overly passionate about this. And it’s not really a huge deal, you’ll have “teH no0bs” anywhere. They’ll learn to make hilarious comments someday. We all will. For now, let the thumbs do the talking.
Jesus Christ ….at some point or another…ALLLLL you motherfuckers said these same exact words!
Are these persons just NOT part of the cool-kids-pack?
For fuck’s sake!
Anything better to do than red-thumb a bastard for mis-stepping in YOUR forum?
I thought it was for everyone! Just because they may not post a lot…sheesh!
And then u green thumb some of the (basically) same comments that other people say. But, they must be part of the pack.
Not a flounce by any means, cuz I’ll green/red thumb a fucker for whatever I feel is really worth it. But some of u guys are real cocks about the thumbs.
FUCKIN’ HELL, Lighten up. BITCHES Now, namaste and play nice. I just wanna read the funny stuff without judgement for cock’s sake.
That’s the stupidest comment I’ve ever seen. Thumbs DOWN you fucker. THUMBS DOWN. You don’t deserve to be here, asshole. You’re all, you’re all “words fail me right now…” Oh, man. You definitely aren’t one of us. TRY AGAIN TOMORROW.
Zen-master Bubba states that when words fail one, silent contemplation is the key to enlightenment and understanding. When one gives voice to nothing, one achieves nothing.
betsyregretsythewonderhorse
December 29, 2011 at 5:25 pm
I totally read it is as ‘shitless father’ As such, I suppose a bag of poop may be an appropriate gift. But when isn’t it,really?
+49
HalfNote5
December 29, 2011 at 9:26 am
At $4.21 USD per pound of excrement, I figure my little pet is probably worth about $20 to $30/week, making at minimum $1040/yr. This of course, is pure s##t in either sense of the phrase.
I was going to say “I have no words”, but seeing as how Luna0124 already said that, I say Oh shit…oh, wait. EvilStepQueen already said that.
Um – how about just plain old ewww.
Or – I will see that bag of cat poop and raise you a bucket of rabbit turds.
Where’s my wine?
I agree. One of my son’s chores is to clean out the cat box. He decided for a while to lie to me about washing his hands, and ended up with ringworm. Know what cures ringworm? Monostat. So, he was walking around with vagina cream on his arms. And he doesn’t lie about washing his hands anymore.
Rabbit poop is a far, far superior product to the feline variety…with my apologies to the kittehs. Plus you could hide them in a box of Raisinettes and give them to someone, and they would be none the wiser, until it was too late…
The good news is that while THIS is a perishable item, it can and will be produced frequently, so as long as there are plastic bags and cat owners and Etsy sellers, your holiday gift list for 2012 is already covered (so to speak).
The part of the description that really stands out for me is “Grossly misrepresented.” I would say the gross part of that is an extreme understatement.
I like how on their ebay page they have a Simpson’s thing stating “I will use Google Before Asking Dumb Questions.” I don’t think Google has any of the answers to my questions about this item.
Thanks to an advanced state of slackassery, I am now offering VINTAGE kitty poo.
I can make it steampunk on request, with a variety of different gear choices available, give it a polynesian flair, or even kawaii it up for you.
Because if its VINTAGE state, it is available in only limited quantities. I may have another treasure trove available in a month or so, but you never know with the market the way it is today.
Yes! Quite refreshingly honest, this poop. People are always selling their favorite yummy flavor of bodily waste: placenta, feces, menstrual blood, non-human variations of the same, etc. But this simple honest soul just calls it poop. Not sacred, not nutritious, not art, not even a conversation piece. Just Poop.
I have got 5 cats, which probably makes me batshit crazy, but unlike most of you fat jealous losers I appear to be sitting on a gold mine. Maybe I should bag up their puke as well? You never know…
Many companies sanitize and sell owl pellets to schools etc for science class. They are still disgusting to dissect…BAD memories of elementary school lol.
I was ahead of my time, I guess. I collected owl pellets from under my Dad’s palm tree, dissected them, cleaned, identified and counted the various species of rodent skulls contained in them, and called it a high school science project. I wish I still had the little jars of rodent skulls of each species, ’cause they were kinda cool in a creepy way.
+18
Nasty Spitgobbler
December 28, 2011 at 8:59 pm
There was a guy on Dirty Jobs whose job was to collect the owl pellets to sell.
I don’t think the book addresses actual hairballs. (But you never know.)
People drink coffee that’s passed through a civet’s digestive tract, and call it a gourmet delicacy. They might be persuaded to wear a sweater that’s been.. er… upcycled. Or up-somethinged.
At the shelter we have terms for varying degrees of kitten shit firmness. Pudding (bad) Toothpaste (better) and Tootsie Rolls (ideal). Unfortunately my foster babbys always seem to be afflicted by pudding when I first get them.
+9
asteroid1717
December 28, 2011 at 4:49 pm
Thank god for the free gift wrapping. I was afraid I was going to have to present 2 lbs. of cat shit to someone as-is.
I just sent the seller a question inquiring as to whether this is a single or multi-cat bag of poop, and what the cat was fed. I’ll report when I know more.
Is it just the poo or is it from a litter box?
Isn’t there a rule about shipping waste?
What kind of cat/s?
Did they eat tea or coffee leaves first? I heard about that digested cat stuff. Ew.
Are kids these days making drugs with cat poop?
I have decided this is not a listing for actual cat poop. This is a sneaky covert listing for something you can’t actually sell this way. The details are either hidden in code within the listing or the seller already has a buyer in mind who knows what to look for. By selling cat poo the seller knows only the intended buyer would ever purchase the item! I want the cops notified and this seller inspected.
If they posted it to be funny, why’d they take it down so soon? Seems like as soon as they got a bunch of hits from Regretsy they took it down. You’d think anyone selling cat poop in jest would appreciate the humor around here, maybe even come join in! Definitely fishy, and I don’t mean the digested and processed Seafood Supper.
If that’s the case I’d hope they’d be smart enough to sell something that wouldn’t draw attention. Something mass-produced by a factory, not mass-produced by a cat’s ass.
You know, the more I look at the suspicious clumps in that photo the more I have the nagging thought that someone may have discovered an ingenious way of selling weed on Ebay.
If she keeps the llama in a barn, the llama can crap directly ON the barnwood. Then it’s DISTRESSED barn wood. even more valuable than regular barnwood!
Who is the target audience? Hoarders with free wi-fi and excess cash? Also, if you really are into purchasing cat shit on the internet, do you really want the back story about some cantankerous creature named Jack who created this two-pound monstrosity?
OMG I’d not read the text! I just hit the headline and then hit the comments… Yeah. I could see using it for some orchid fertiliser miracle, but if you want a story, that is abnormal behavior, right there.
Finally, the final component needed for my alternative fuel flying car is available! The masters at the Royal Academy of Science all laughed at me when I proposed my design for the fantastic flying motorcar powered entirely with feline effluent, but I knew my vision was right. Pearls before swine. Who will have the last laugh now?
Looks more like 1.75 pounds of cat litter with a handful of poop thrown in. They may have the BBB seal of approval, but I have a feeling the Office of Weights and Measures may want a word with them.
It does look like it’s mostly kitty litter. That’s how they get you, just so you know before you invest. You need to make sure that the poopies you get are pure and not loaded down with litter to pad the weight.
They really ought to be reported for this. Maybe this is why the auction was taken down?
Actually, I have a fab recipe for litter-box cookies. I made a bunch for an SPCA fundraiser and the hotter the day got, the more realistic the cookies began to look. Fortunately they all sold out by noon – they were the most popular cookie there!
Being thumbed down isn’t a horrible thing. You made a certain amount of people say “ugggg” in their brains as they were reading. Don’t think of it as being a sad thing, think of it as giving some people something to click and occupy themselves.
Without people being thumbed down the option of thumbs up would have no meaning. YOU…YOU gave it meaning today, and that’s important.
A legitimate use for the cat litter would be for destroying outdated medicines. However I have found that you don’t need real cat turds for that “je ne sais quot”, because expired suppositories rolled in cat litter look like the real thing.
I carry fresh, yummy, UNUSED cat litter in my car for just that purpose.
I prefer 2D. We had a bag just like this one sitting outside, on it’s way to the garbage can. My husband accidentally ran over it with our 48,000 lb. motorhome and squished it completely flat. The bag didn’t break, turning 3D cat crap into the world most disgusting frisbee. It was awesome, and we kept it around for days to show to friends.
Cat shit – is it *real* cat shit or does the term “digested and processed” mean the marijuana has been cleaned of stems, seeds and other stuff? I swear, when people smoke the stuff, it smells like cat shit.
And, no. I don’t smoke that shit.
And if it is real cat shit, is this business an off-shoot of the business that used to send hermetically sealed packages of dog shit to people you hate anonymously, like http://www.dogdoo.com.
I ran a professional poop-scooping biz for 14 years and was told by the state of California that if I removed the waste from the property (as opposed to tossing the bagged shit in their garbage like they would do themselves) I would need a license to haul hazardous waste which, at the time, ran about $250 per year.
Perhaps someone turned the seller in to Ebay?
We’ve been discussing the commercial viability of marketing cat poop on etsy for some time on this site. Someone finally decided to actually try it, but they didn’t want to sully their etsy shop, so on ebay it went. That’s my theory and I’m sticking to it.
Frankly I think etsy is the better, more discriminating market for this sort of thing, though.
Buyer be ware. I ordered two pounds of cat crap from this seller, but there was at least two problems. First, it wasn’t two pounds. I measured it. It was 1 pound 13 ounces at best. Secondly, I definitely tasted some dog crap in there.
Wait, by “This item has been digested and processed”, does it mean in the way that poop is digested food, or is this poop from some kind of Cat Centipede?
You totally would buy… well, maybe just half a pound of Cat Centipede poop.
I do believe this is a “the cat ate food and then pooped it.” Otherwise it would have been listed as “pooped cat”. But you never know, some people disregard the listing rules.
Hey! “The item has been removed.” Does that mean it sold? Because I happen to live with a fat orange thing known as The Ultimate Poopin’ Machine. I need to trademark it so my buyers will know there is only ONE.
I have some extra cats.
Anyone want a cat poop dispenser?
One of my cats left me a mouse in my bed for Christmas… well, most of one. Aparrently the ass end was tastier than the mid section and head it left for me.
Just post your address and I’ll ship that poop dispenser right out to you, I’ll even cut holes in the box and stuff!
No! The midsection and the head are THE tastiest parts, which is why it was left for you. I don’t have a cat, but I’ve been regaled with such stories by cat owners and the sentiment is always the same: They don’t understand why we don’t hunt for our food and they’re trying to teach us. Sure, we take cans and open them and, wa-lah!, tasty food is put into the cat’s dish, but nothing’s as satisfying as hunting down your own and enjoying it off the hoof, uh, foot, as it were. If you’re trying to teach someone to hunt, you’d leave the tastiest portions, to entice them to go find their own. Maybe you’ve found a live mouse running about the house? He’s there for you to practice chasing. I’m sure the cat chases along with you. It’s a bonding experience!
@Dog Breath, I’m guessing. Honestly guessing. Maybe they’re not the tastiest—maybe the tush is the tastiest and that’s how they entice you to hunt…so you can get your own mouse and enjoy the tush for yourself. I know how parakeets and canaries think. I’m going on second-hand knowledge about the cats.
I have a question: Assuming you talk to one or more of your cats when you’re close to them, have you ever had a cat’s paw pressed against your mouth? I’ve had that happen with one or two cats I’ve known. Their owners swore it never happened to them. Maybe it’s a not-so-subtle way to tell me to shut up and go back to petting the cat.
A friend has a Bearded Dragon and an indoor cat, so she has to buy food for the dragon.
YES!!! The mice in their tiny Nike sneakers!! Thank you SO much for reminding me of that story. Still makes me giggle, no matter how many times I read or think of it.
What presentation! Did he sift it before he laid it down? It looks so light and fluffy. I completely skipped the sifting step and my litter turned into a hard rock of cement. Recycle I must, and I am listing as we speak, my cat encased in carbonite litter on Etsy.
December 28, 2011 at 4:41 pm
oh shit!
December 29, 2011 at 11:53 am
Brown paper bag and matches sold separately
December 29, 2011 at 6:49 pm
Oh, on the contrary – it says gift wrapping is free!
December 28, 2011 at 4:42 pm
I have no words.
December 28, 2011 at 4:47 pm
I’m glad you didn’t let that stop you.
December 28, 2011 at 11:22 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
December 29, 2011 at 12:17 pm
“THUMBS DOWN ASSHOLE!”
It’s funny because you, too!
No offense, though. You just seem kind of overly passionate about this. And it’s not really a huge deal, you’ll have “teH no0bs” anywhere. They’ll learn to make hilarious comments someday. We all will. For now, let the thumbs do the talking.
December 29, 2011 at 2:13 pm
Jesus Christ ….at some point or another…ALLLLL you motherfuckers said these same exact words!
Are these persons just NOT part of the cool-kids-pack?
For fuck’s sake!
Anything better to do than red-thumb a bastard for mis-stepping in YOUR forum?
I thought it was for everyone! Just because they may not post a lot…sheesh!
And then u green thumb some of the (basically) same comments that other people say. But, they must be part of the pack.
Not a flounce by any means, cuz I’ll green/red thumb a fucker for whatever I feel is really worth it. But some of u guys are real cocks about the thumbs.
FUCKIN’ HELL, Lighten up. BITCHES Now, namaste and play nice. I just wanna read the funny stuff without judgement for cock’s sake.
December 29, 2011 at 5:14 pm
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December 29, 2011 at 5:20 pm
I think it was sarcasm…
December 29, 2011 at 5:34 pm
I love you Luna. With more than my thumbs. *eyebrow waggle*
December 28, 2011 at 4:42 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
December 28, 2011 at 11:20 pm
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December 29, 2011 at 11:44 am
It bears repeating.
December 30, 2011 at 9:11 am
Wow, you deserve to have someone drop that bag of catshit on your porch and light it on fire.
December 29, 2011 at 9:22 am
Zen-master Bubba states that when words fail one, silent contemplation is the key to enlightenment and understanding. When one gives voice to nothing, one achieves nothing.
December 29, 2011 at 11:52 am
in this case one achieves thumbs down
either way BUDDAH ROCKS
December 29, 2011 at 1:56 pm
Your observation pleases Zen-master Bubba. ; )
December 29, 2011 at 7:10 pm
Namaste BITCHES!!
December 28, 2011 at 4:42 pm
Apparently my cat is shitting a gold mine.
December 28, 2011 at 4:47 pm
If that’s the case, you should clean out the litter box more often.
December 28, 2011 at 5:03 pm
I’m sure there’s a market. With all those conceptual artists and Damien Hirst emulators and whatnot…
December 28, 2011 at 5:05 pm
I like to believe that my cats wouldn’t even shit on Damien Hirst.
December 28, 2011 at 8:09 pm
I’d only be interested in this if it came in blue.
December 29, 2011 at 4:24 am
I’m sure I could find a diet for my cat that would produce the requested product.
December 29, 2011 at 3:33 am
I only wish I’d seen this sooner. I would have had the perfect Christmas gift for my daughter’s shiftless father.
December 29, 2011 at 3:49 pm
I read that as “shirtless father,” and thought such a person, unless magnificently built, deserves a bag of cat poop.
December 29, 2011 at 5:25 pm
I totally read it is as ‘shitless father’ As such, I suppose a bag of poop may be an appropriate gift. But when isn’t it,really?
December 29, 2011 at 9:26 am
At $4.21 USD per pound of excrement, I figure my little pet is probably worth about $20 to $30/week, making at minimum $1040/yr. This of course, is pure s##t in either sense of the phrase.
December 28, 2011 at 4:43 pm
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December 28, 2011 at 4:43 pm
This sale…something about it is fishy…
December 28, 2011 at 9:18 pm
Kitty had sardines for dinner.
December 28, 2011 at 9:58 pm
ooooo that smell
can’t you smell that smell
ooooo that smell
the tuna smell surrounds you!! –
with apologies to Lynyrd Skynyrd
January 1, 2012 at 6:44 am
It says you can return it if the item has been “grossly misrepresented”……….so how about just plain ‘ol “grossly represented”?
December 28, 2011 at 4:43 pm
COMMENCE THE CATTY COMMENTS!
December 29, 2011 at 3:51 pm
Shall we stand catty-corner before or after commenting?
December 28, 2011 at 4:43 pm
I was going to say “I have no words”, but seeing as how Luna0124 already said that, I say Oh shit…oh, wait. EvilStepQueen already said that.
Um – how about just plain old ewww.
Or – I will see that bag of cat poop and raise you a bucket of rabbit turds.
Where’s my wine?
December 28, 2011 at 7:07 pm
YAY WINE!!
December 28, 2011 at 7:43 pm
Well, I’ve got rabbit shit and cat shit. I could glue shit to other shit and make me a lotta green shit!
December 29, 2011 at 9:26 am
Don’t forget to glue a monicle on it.
You know, for the steamy punk fans
December 29, 2011 at 11:58 am
must have a mustache and glitter
December 29, 2011 at 3:40 pm
And the glitter will be in the form of a tear.
December 29, 2011 at 1:39 pm
And some gears. You can’t forget the gears: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TFCuE5rHbPA
December 29, 2011 at 10:26 am
And THAT, kids, is what we refer to as “Etsy legal.”
December 28, 2011 at 10:59 pm
Rabbit turds would be more useful (great for the garden) and much safer (not as many zoonotic pathogens and parasites).
December 29, 2011 at 10:27 am
I agree. One of my son’s chores is to clean out the cat box. He decided for a while to lie to me about washing his hands, and ended up with ringworm. Know what cures ringworm? Monostat. So, he was walking around with vagina cream on his arms. And he doesn’t lie about washing his hands anymore.
December 29, 2011 at 2:40 pm
That anecdote made my day. Athlete’s foot cream would have worked as well (and it’s less expensive). But don’t tell him that!
December 29, 2011 at 6:01 pm
Exact same stuff. I consider it “boy packaging” and “girl packaging.” Win for embarrassment factor.
December 29, 2011 at 8:33 pm
Focus group testing showed that “Athletic Vagina Cream” was going to fall short on market penetration.
December 30, 2011 at 6:41 am
Rabbit poop is a far, far superior product to the feline variety…with my apologies to the kittehs. Plus you could hide them in a box of Raisinettes and give them to someone, and they would be none the wiser, until it was too late…
December 28, 2011 at 4:43 pm
And you wait until AFTER Christmas to show us this?
December 28, 2011 at 4:53 pm
And I was going to say THIS.
December 29, 2011 at 4:04 pm
The good news is that while THIS is a perishable item, it can and will be produced frequently, so as long as there are plastic bags and cat owners and Etsy sellers, your holiday gift list for 2012 is already covered (so to speak).
December 28, 2011 at 4:44 pm
I can think of quite a few people I’d like to give that to.
Especially if it was mailed from a third party address and couldn’t be traced back to me.
December 28, 2011 at 5:16 pm
and gift-wrapped for that extra special touch!
December 28, 2011 at 7:08 pm
Because wrapping it would be more civilized…we are classy people around here, after all…
December 28, 2011 at 7:14 pm
I would like to wrap the bag in fire, so it could be left on the recipient’s porch.
December 28, 2011 at 9:12 pm
I gave you ALL my likes!
December 29, 2011 at 9:34 am
You can http://www.shitsenders.com
My personal suggestion is the Gorilla Shit.
December 28, 2011 at 4:44 pm
The part of the description that really stands out for me is “Grossly misrepresented.” I would say the gross part of that is an extreme understatement.
December 28, 2011 at 5:22 pm
It wouldn’t make good business sense for them to give you a refund for it being grossly represented. Although nobody could argue that.
December 28, 2011 at 4:45 pm
Its a tad expensive… Anybody wanna go halvsies on it with me?
December 28, 2011 at 6:28 pm
you pay for shipping, and I’ll send you double that amount.
December 28, 2011 at 6:38 pm
Sure – As long as we eat the money first.. and use the same medium as our method of payment. Talk about slingin’ ****.
December 28, 2011 at 4:45 pm
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December 29, 2011 at 1:02 am
A gift for the person who has everything?
December 29, 2011 at 12:58 pm
It’s for the person who says “You never give me SHIT!”
December 29, 2011 at 6:54 pm
You don’t bring me flowers,
You don’t mail me cat shit…
December 28, 2011 at 4:45 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
December 28, 2011 at 4:45 pm
I like how on their ebay page they have a Simpson’s thing stating “I will use Google Before Asking Dumb Questions.” I don’t think Google has any of the answers to my questions about this item.
December 28, 2011 at 5:06 pm
Try turning off Safe Search. That might yield results.
December 28, 2011 at 4:45 pm
Dammit! I knew I shouldn’t just throw the used kitty litter away. I could sell it at a profit to weirdos on the internet!
December 29, 2011 at 1:04 am
Yes, but will your cat poo be gift wrapped? That’s a deal breaker for me.
Also, how many cats do you have as I may want to make a bulk order of these “gifts”.
December 29, 2011 at 1:52 am
I could pay my child to wrap it but I’d have to charge extra for the glitter. I have 2 furbabies but one of them poops enough for 3.
January 9, 2012 at 11:17 am
Thanks to an advanced state of slackassery, I am now offering VINTAGE kitty poo.
I can make it steampunk on request, with a variety of different gear choices available, give it a polynesian flair, or even kawaii it up for you.
Because if its VINTAGE state, it is available in only limited quantities. I may have another treasure trove available in a month or so, but you never know with the market the way it is today.
January 9, 2012 at 11:18 am
Grr.
December 28, 2011 at 4:45 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
December 28, 2011 at 4:45 pm
Did anyone click through to see the asking price? It’s like $86,000.
December 28, 2011 at 4:54 pm
Sorry for the jinx. Great minds and all that…
December 28, 2011 at 4:45 pm
Another example of how useless a seal from the Better Business Bureau is.
December 28, 2011 at 9:16 pm
December 28, 2011 at 4:45 pm
This is the most honest listing of a handcrafted item I have seen in a long time…
December 28, 2011 at 6:54 pm
It wasn’t their hands they were using…
December 28, 2011 at 8:11 pm
No shit. Wait!
December 29, 2011 at 2:30 pm
Yes! Quite refreshingly honest, this poop. People are always selling their favorite yummy flavor of bodily waste: placenta, feces, menstrual blood, non-human variations of the same, etc. But this simple honest soul just calls it poop. Not sacred, not nutritious, not art, not even a conversation piece. Just Poop.
December 29, 2011 at 6:02 pm
And it’s on ebay, not Etsy. Go figure.
December 28, 2011 at 4:46 pm
Sheesh, first it was movies, and then the Nintendo DS. People will buy anything if it says 3D at the end.
December 28, 2011 at 9:24 pm
Well 2D cat poop is so last year…
December 28, 2011 at 4:47 pm
Seem’s reasonable although the shipping seems a little high.
December 28, 2011 at 4:47 pm
I work at an animal shelter… I am swimming in money every day, apparently!
December 28, 2011 at 5:05 pm
Wouldn’t swimming in “it” create some kind of BioHazard?
December 29, 2011 at 4:13 pm
Instead of a plastic bag, you could repurpose jam jars and sell it that way: BioHazard’s Original BioHazard.
You’re welcome.
December 29, 2011 at 5:22 pm
Just don’t forget to wash your hands. And every other part of you.
December 29, 2011 at 6:14 pm
And do some of that washing with Hillbilly Bajingo Wash!
December 28, 2011 at 4:48 pm
You can “Buy it Now” for only US $86,753.09.
December 28, 2011 at 4:55 pm
Apparently the seller is Tommy Tutone. Your name looks suspiciously like “Jenny”, I might add..
December 28, 2011 at 5:18 pm
Doesn’t it? I hope it offends everyone.
December 28, 2011 at 4:48 pm
My 2 cat’s crap looks waaay better than that! I’m gonna go bag some right now. I’ll be taking bids shortly…
December 28, 2011 at 4:48 pm
I have got 5 cats, which probably makes me batshit crazy, but unlike most of you fat jealous losers I appear to be sitting on a gold mine. Maybe I should bag up their puke as well? You never know…
December 28, 2011 at 4:52 pm
I wonder if there’s a market for hairballs and puke the way there is for owl pellets…
December 28, 2011 at 5:00 pm
there is a market for owl pellets? Twoo would buy owl puke???
December 28, 2011 at 5:29 pm
http://www.amazon.com/Owl-Pellets-Set-of-5/dp/B00192CC8Q
December 28, 2011 at 5:32 pm
Many companies sanitize and sell owl pellets to schools etc for science class. They are still disgusting to dissect…BAD memories of elementary school lol.
December 28, 2011 at 6:25 pm
never knew that. Regretsy is educational. OMFG
December 28, 2011 at 6:55 pm
that was the best day!
December 28, 2011 at 8:44 pm
Hee hee. I was that teacher who thought the owl pellets were soooooo cool.
December 28, 2011 at 11:52 pm
I was ahead of my time, I guess. I collected owl pellets from under my Dad’s palm tree, dissected them, cleaned, identified and counted the various species of rodent skulls contained in them, and called it a high school science project. I wish I still had the little jars of rodent skulls of each species, ’cause they were kinda cool in a creepy way.
December 28, 2011 at 8:59 pm
There was a guy on Dirty Jobs whose job was to collect the owl pellets to sell.
December 28, 2011 at 9:05 pm
It wasn’t really his job. It was more like a homeless guy collecting cans, only more specialized.
December 28, 2011 at 5:02 pm
I think you could handcraft your own yarn from the hairballs and sell it on Etsy! OOAK to a whole new level!
December 28, 2011 at 5:11 pm
ooooooooooooh… I might stick some vintage steampunk glitter on twit!
December 28, 2011 at 7:41 pm
http://www.amazon.com/Crafting-Cat-Hair-Cute-Handicrafts/dp/1594745250/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1325129776&sr=1-1
Well, there’s a book for it.
December 29, 2011 at 6:32 am
I don’t think the book addresses actual hairballs. (But you never know.)
People drink coffee that’s passed through a civet’s digestive tract, and call it a gourmet delicacy. They might be persuaded to wear a sweater that’s been.. er… upcycled. Or up-somethinged.
December 29, 2011 at 1:04 pm
I think upchucked might be the word you’re looking for
December 28, 2011 at 4:49 pm
That is some Level 4 Cat’s Assery right there. In 3D, no less.
December 28, 2011 at 9:20 pm
December 28, 2011 at 10:01 pm
You win, this is.
December 28, 2011 at 10:07 pm
Catse?
December 30, 2011 at 8:25 pm
just because, look at my gravatar. rather apropos here
methinks;DDecember 28, 2011 at 4:49 pm
They should sell it in smaller bags, I can’t eat that much at once before it goes bad.
December 28, 2011 at 4:58 pm
That’s what you get for eating cat shit without salt.
December 28, 2011 at 5:07 pm
I understand that was the inspiration behind salted licorice.
December 28, 2011 at 6:45 pm
Whenever the dog would get into the cat box, my roommate would say he was eating “kitty almond roca.”
December 28, 2011 at 9:13 pm
We used to call them “tootsie rolls.”
December 28, 2011 at 11:55 pm
At the shelter we have terms for varying degrees of kitten shit firmness. Pudding (bad) Toothpaste (better) and Tootsie Rolls (ideal). Unfortunately my foster babbys always seem to be afflicted by pudding when I first get them.
December 28, 2011 at 4:49 pm
Thank god for the free gift wrapping. I was afraid I was going to have to present 2 lbs. of cat shit to someone as-is.
December 28, 2011 at 4:49 pm
Me: What the hell.
Husband: Oh good lord.
*silence descends*
December 28, 2011 at 7:32 pm
How many times have I had that moment, courtesy of The Regretsy Lady?
December 28, 2011 at 4:50 pm
YAY! It can be gift wrapped!
December 28, 2011 at 5:57 pm
That’s what I was thinking. “I’ll buy this crap! Totally!” But then…then I saw it.
I CAN GET IT GIFT WRAPPED. Holy dancing pizzas! I’ll take 20!
Except all I have is a pile of Wheat Thins and a bottle of Benadryl. Darn.
I think they already take more interesting medications than that. Or they need to.
December 28, 2011 at 4:50 pm
Big deal, my dog generates that much everyday. Too bad I can’t spare any to sell.
December 28, 2011 at 4:52 pm
Sell DOG poop? Don’t be ridiculous…
December 28, 2011 at 5:01 pm
sharing is caring you tightarsed sod! Tsk…
December 28, 2011 at 8:42 pm
Your dog generates cat shit? Never mind selling it, take him on Stupid Pet Tricks!
December 28, 2011 at 9:26 pm
It’s like the cat that barks. Except not.
December 28, 2011 at 4:51 pm
I just sent the seller a question inquiring as to whether this is a single or multi-cat bag of poop, and what the cat was fed. I’ll report when I know more.
December 28, 2011 at 4:57 pm
Oh please, PLEASE do. I must know.
December 28, 2011 at 7:34 pm
EW! Ew ew ew ew! Imagine… Whatif… it was CHEAP and CORN ORIENTED “food”?! waaaaaaay worse.
December 28, 2011 at 4:51 pm
Can the size of smell be adjusted? Oh wait…it’s not etsy.
December 28, 2011 at 7:24 pm
At least it’s an actual bag of cat shit and not just a photo of one.
Oh wait…
December 28, 2011 at 4:53 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
December 28, 2011 at 4:59 pm
Is it just the poo or is it from a litter box?
Isn’t there a rule about shipping waste?
What kind of cat/s?
Did they eat tea or coffee leaves first? I heard about that digested cat stuff. Ew.
Are kids these days making drugs with cat poop?
I have decided this is not a listing for actual cat poop. This is a sneaky covert listing for something you can’t actually sell this way. The details are either hidden in code within the listing or the seller already has a buyer in mind who knows what to look for. By selling cat poo the seller knows only the intended buyer would ever purchase the item! I want the cops notified and this seller inspected.
December 28, 2011 at 6:16 pm
Or the listing is just supposed to be funny.
There are lots of clues that we’re not not supposed to take it at face value. I especially love the BBB logo.
December 28, 2011 at 6:42 pm
If they posted it to be funny, why’d they take it down so soon? Seems like as soon as they got a bunch of hits from Regretsy they took it down. You’d think anyone selling cat poop in jest would appreciate the humor around here, maybe even come join in! Definitely fishy, and I don’t mean the digested and processed Seafood Supper.
December 29, 2011 at 10:08 am
Maybe it was actually code for something illicit. If so, I’d give a lot to know what.
December 29, 2011 at 10:39 am
It probably got reported and taken down by eBay. Poop would be a prohibited item on eBay.
They should have listed it on Etsy; then there would have been no problem.
December 28, 2011 at 7:36 pm
It’s our numbers. They naturally create an intitial fear. We have to watch out for being reeeeeal geeeeeentle now we’re fsamous
December 28, 2011 at 8:19 pm
If that’s the case I’d hope they’d be smart enough to sell something that wouldn’t draw attention. Something mass-produced by a factory, not mass-produced by a cat’s ass.
December 28, 2011 at 8:21 pm
Imagine the seller fees. No one is buying this. Investing in heavy duty foil is much better though.. You deserve the very best.
December 28, 2011 at 4:53 pm
I’m going to go waaaaaaayyyyy out on a limb and guess that the seller is thumbs-downing everyone’s comments. LET THE BUTTHURT COMMENCE!!
December 28, 2011 at 6:29 pm
Doubt it. The ones I see that are down-thumbed are for pretty obvious reasons.
December 28, 2011 at 6:36 pm
Right at the start, EVERYONE had an immediate thumbs down. Things have evened out a bit now.
December 28, 2011 at 7:09 pm
They were thumbed down for unoriginal comments.
December 28, 2011 at 8:23 pm
I read that as “urological comments” …but then I realized I had the wrong end.
December 28, 2011 at 4:53 pm
You know, the more I look at the suspicious clumps in that photo the more I have the nagging thought that someone may have discovered an ingenious way of selling weed on Ebay.
December 28, 2011 at 4:55 pm
Even if that’s the case, the selling price is too high.
December 28, 2011 at 4:55 pm
and what it it wasn’t?
December 28, 2011 at 4:56 pm
What if it wasn’t weed or what if it wasn’t ingenious?
December 28, 2011 at 4:58 pm
Well, there’s no accounting for taste…wait…yes there is.
December 28, 2011 at 5:00 pm
Conflict diamonds?
December 28, 2011 at 5:06 pm
You may be on to something.
December 28, 2011 at 5:03 pm
Finally, something I can use Ebay for other than Nerf and Lego.
December 28, 2011 at 4:55 pm
I have about 50 pounds of llama shit. What do you think I can get for it?
December 28, 2011 at 4:56 pm
Exotic! It has to be worth way more than plain old cat shit.
December 28, 2011 at 5:02 pm
was it sourced responsibly?
December 28, 2011 at 6:01 pm
Can you photograph it against a background of distressed wood?
December 28, 2011 at 6:58 pm
If she keeps the llama in a barn, the llama can crap directly ON the barnwood. Then it’s DISTRESSED barn wood. even more valuable than regular barnwood!
December 28, 2011 at 4:55 pm
What the actual fuck?!?
Wish I had known there was a market for poop when I still had kids in diapers…
December 28, 2011 at 5:03 pm
there is a market for kids poop diaper art, or so I seem to remember when I wake up screaming in the dead of night?
December 28, 2011 at 5:25 pm
I fatfingered and downthumbed your comment by mistake. Sorry!
December 28, 2011 at 6:26 pm
LOL you fat jealous loser! <3
December 28, 2011 at 4:59 pm
Complimentary backdrop – check
Flattering lighting – check
Best angle achieved by turntable – check
Good composition – check
Decomposition – ack!
December 28, 2011 at 4:59 pm
Who is the target audience? Hoarders with free wi-fi and excess cash? Also, if you really are into purchasing cat shit on the internet, do you really want the back story about some cantankerous creature named Jack who created this two-pound monstrosity?
December 28, 2011 at 5:05 pm
If Etsy has taught us anything, it’s the $86k value of the backstory in selling shit.
December 28, 2011 at 7:41 pm
OMG I’d not read the text! I just hit the headline and then hit the comments… Yeah. I could see using it for some orchid fertiliser miracle, but if you want a story, that is abnormal behavior, right there.
December 28, 2011 at 5:04 pm
Check out the individually used wrenches.
http://www.ebay.com/itm/2-Inch-1-7-8-Inch-Proto-USA-3080-professional-Open-Ended-Wrench-/250961355241?pt=Motors_Automotive_Tools&vxp=mtr&hash=item3a6e7661e9
December 28, 2011 at 5:10 pm
There’s an “Add to Watch List” button on the listing. Too bad that doesn’t mean what I wish it could mean…
December 28, 2011 at 5:12 pm
Not even in a fancy bag? I’ll pass.
December 28, 2011 at 6:38 pm
Presentation is everything when it comes to cat shit.
December 28, 2011 at 8:39 pm
It should be sorted out and placed in a lovely box much like the way fine chocolates are sorted.
I just make myself have a case of the giggles. tee hee hee
December 29, 2011 at 12:01 am
“Presentation is everything when it comes to cat shit”
December 30, 2011 at 8:26 pm
It would also be funny if it said “Namaste bitches”
December 28, 2011 at 5:12 pm
I’m in for the gift wrapping.
December 28, 2011 at 7:43 pm
I’m pickin’ a fantasy league of twenty or so recipients!
December 28, 2011 at 5:12 pm
How is it that no one has asked a question yet in the questions section on the ebay page? I have oh so many questions.
December 28, 2011 at 6:37 pm
And each answer would probably leave you with more questions.
December 28, 2011 at 5:21 pm
Oh no…the listing is removed. Now we’ll never know. Multi-cat? Conflict diamonds? Weed? I know I won’t be sleeping tonight.
December 28, 2011 at 6:02 pm
I know!!! Shit, did somebody buy it? I was gonna make an offer, since the neighborhood cats don’t dump on my lawn enough already.
December 29, 2011 at 1:15 am
Oooo, that’s free-range poo on your lawn. No battery cat poo for you. Swish!
December 28, 2011 at 5:29 pm
Finally, the final component needed for my alternative fuel flying car is available! The masters at the Royal Academy of Science all laughed at me when I proposed my design for the fantastic flying motorcar powered entirely with feline effluent, but I knew my vision was right. Pearls before swine. Who will have the last laugh now?
December 28, 2011 at 7:45 pm
Is it wrong that this comment the whole thing?
December 28, 2011 at 5:48 pm
The problem with this is that the poop clearly is overed with cat litter, which renders it worthless to almost all collectors.
December 28, 2011 at 5:50 pm
Some mornings you need a cafe-mocha-vodka-valium-latte
December 28, 2011 at 5:50 pm
And to think I dispose of my cat shit. Silly me.
December 28, 2011 at 6:00 pm
Looks more like 1.75 pounds of cat litter with a handful of poop thrown in. They may have the BBB seal of approval, but I have a feeling the Office of Weights and Measures may want a word with them.
December 28, 2011 at 6:10 pm
It does look like it’s mostly kitty litter. That’s how they get you, just so you know before you invest. You need to make sure that the poopies you get are pure and not loaded down with litter to pad the weight.
They really ought to be reported for this. Maybe this is why the auction was taken down?
December 29, 2011 at 6:59 pm
It’s the black-market cat poop equivalent of “stems and seeds.”
December 28, 2011 at 9:26 pm
It’s just like the marshmallow bits in Lucky Charms. “They’re magically cat-licious!”
December 28, 2011 at 6:02 pm
My dog thinks cat poop from a litter box is Almond Roca.
December 28, 2011 at 6:03 pm
God, that’s disgusting. Thumbs up.
December 28, 2011 at 7:52 pm
That reminds me of my favorite haiku:
the cat is not bad
he leaves me sweet tootsie rolls
in the litter box
December 29, 2011 at 12:46 pm
My sister calls it Kitty Roca… it’s a delicacy for her dogs.
December 28, 2011 at 6:17 pm
The Red Thumbs are out in force tonight!
*cowers*
December 28, 2011 at 6:27 pm
My cat likes to eat various things it can find on the floor. I can sell SPECIALTY cat shit!
December 28, 2011 at 7:11 pm
Make sure some has the crafting herpes!
December 28, 2011 at 8:42 pm
Roll em in glitter. They can be magic turdie poops and can be given as gifts for a job well done to deserving people in our lives.
I smell etsy shop theme idea here….
December 28, 2011 at 9:31 pm
Actually, I have a fab recipe for litter-box cookies. I made a bunch for an SPCA fundraiser and the hotter the day got, the more realistic the cookies began to look. Fortunately they all sold out by noon – they were the most popular cookie there!
December 28, 2011 at 9:31 pm
December 28, 2011 at 10:07 pm
It’s a KE$HA KAT!!! Glitter poop and glitter hairballs!
December 29, 2011 at 9:28 am
This is EXACTLY why we don’t use tinsel anymore.
December 28, 2011 at 6:28 pm
All my witty, immensely comical comments have been thumbed down. I feel worthless and irrelevant. Again.
December 28, 2011 at 6:38 pm
I gave you a thumbs up, just to soften the other blows.
December 28, 2011 at 8:44 pm
Being thumbed down isn’t a horrible thing. You made a certain amount of people say “ugggg” in their brains as they were reading. Don’t think of it as being a sad thing, think of it as giving some people something to click and occupy themselves.
Without people being thumbed down the option of thumbs up would have no meaning. YOU…YOU gave it meaning today, and that’s important.
December 28, 2011 at 6:45 pm
Now I’m just curious what would people even use this for?
December 28, 2011 at 7:47 pm
I learned this in my breakroom the othetr day!
“Alaskan Pipeline”!
!!!
December 28, 2011 at 9:49 pm
A legitimate use for the cat litter would be for destroying outdated medicines. However I have found that you don’t need real cat turds for that “je ne sais quot”, because expired suppositories rolled in cat litter look like the real thing.
I carry fresh, yummy, UNUSED cat litter in my car for just that purpose.
December 28, 2011 at 6:45 pm
Wait, 3D?
December 28, 2011 at 7:23 pm
I prefer 2D. We had a bag just like this one sitting outside, on it’s way to the garbage can. My husband accidentally ran over it with our 48,000 lb. motorhome and squished it completely flat. The bag didn’t break, turning 3D cat crap into the world most disgusting frisbee. It was awesome, and we kept it around for days to show to friends.
December 28, 2011 at 9:31 pm
Wow, I guess 2D crap really CAN be current.
December 28, 2011 at 6:47 pm
The only thumbs down I see are the ones breaking bronc’s posting rules. I’ve noticed some of us more pedantic fjls enforcing those for him…
December 28, 2011 at 8:45 pm
Rules? I am going to have to find those so I can be in compliance.
December 28, 2011 at 9:34 pm
http://cf4l.regretsy.com/2011/06/02/members-only-49/
December 28, 2011 at 11:15 pm
Yes, I understand and these are good rules. I shall commit them to memory and try to uphold them.
Thank you very much for this. We all need guidelines and rules or it would be anarchy. We can’t have that.
December 28, 2011 at 6:50 pm
. . . and not a single LOLcat graphic to be seen . . . .
December 28, 2011 at 6:50 pm
Dammit! I already found the shitty gift for my stepdick’s birthday. Seriously, why did you have to wait until AFTER xmas to show us this??
December 28, 2011 at 7:12 pm
They took it down already? And I was just going to add it to my WISH LIST.
December 28, 2011 at 7:21 pm
Crap – I wanted to use it to lend an air of authenticity to my next kitty litter cake!
December 28, 2011 at 7:53 pm
Cat shit – is it *real* cat shit or does the term “digested and processed” mean the marijuana has been cleaned of stems, seeds and other stuff? I swear, when people smoke the stuff, it smells like cat shit.
And, no. I don’t smoke that shit.
And if it is real cat shit, is this business an off-shoot of the business that used to send hermetically sealed packages of dog shit to people you hate anonymously, like http://www.dogdoo.com.
December 28, 2011 at 7:54 pm
I’m surprised no one has posted pix of their favorite POS.
December 28, 2011 at 9:53 pm
I thought about posting a picture of my old HR director before I realized you were speaking literally.
December 28, 2011 at 8:18 pm
Well thank goodness it’s an *accredited* business, is all I can say.
Wouldn’t want any sketchy poop, now would we.
December 28, 2011 at 8:41 pm
Well, I’m sure as shit not going to buy it without knowing what condition it’s in. Jeez, some sellers. Fill in the damned fields!
December 28, 2011 at 9:32 pm
Maybe it was cutting into their time to be drunk.
December 28, 2011 at 8:58 pm
GODDAMNIT I JUST EMPTIED MY MILLIONS INTO THE OUTSIDE TRASH FUUUUUUUU
December 28, 2011 at 9:10 pm
Well at least they can gift wrap it for me because otherwise I wouldn’t buy it!
December 28, 2011 at 9:24 pm
I ran a professional poop-scooping biz for 14 years and was told by the state of California that if I removed the waste from the property (as opposed to tossing the bagged shit in their garbage like they would do themselves) I would need a license to haul hazardous waste which, at the time, ran about $250 per year.
Perhaps someone turned the seller in to Ebay?
December 28, 2011 at 9:39 pm
We’ve been discussing the commercial viability of marketing cat poop on etsy for some time on this site. Someone finally decided to actually try it, but they didn’t want to sully their etsy shop, so on ebay it went. That’s my theory and I’m sticking to it.
Frankly I think etsy is the better, more discriminating market for this sort of thing, though.
December 28, 2011 at 9:51 pm
It would need gears glued on for the Steampunk vibe. I guess you could make the mustaches out of carefully selected.. gakkkk.. what am I saying?
December 28, 2011 at 10:41 pm
Cat turd mustache lollipops! In regular and Almond Roca flavor!
December 28, 2011 at 9:40 pm
Cat Shit Cachet, – Catch It!
December 28, 2011 at 10:05 pm
What are the odds of hooking up the crazy cat shit lady with the guy who likes to paint with his own shit? It would be a shitstorm made in hell.
December 29, 2011 at 12:33 am
And it would be beautiful. Maybe. But probably just crappy.
December 28, 2011 at 11:03 pm
Buyer be ware. I ordered two pounds of cat crap from this seller, but there was at least two problems. First, it wasn’t two pounds. I measured it. It was 1 pound 13 ounces at best. Secondly, I definitely tasted some dog crap in there.
December 28, 2011 at 11:39 pm
Wait, by “This item has been digested and processed”, does it mean in the way that poop is digested food, or is this poop from some kind of Cat Centipede?
You totally would buy… well, maybe just half a pound of Cat Centipede poop.
December 28, 2011 at 11:57 pm
While I can’t make this myself I don’t think I’ll buy it over the internet. There are many reliable local suppliers, after all.
December 29, 2011 at 1:24 am
Yeah, imaging the carbon footprint of having this shipped. Buy locally!!
December 29, 2011 at 9:49 am
If this makes a “carbon footprint” it’s time to inspect your sneakers.
December 29, 2011 at 12:15 am
And to think… I’ve just been tossing this in the garbage
December 29, 2011 at 7:08 am
Why couldn’t I have seen this BEFORE I finished my holiday shopping…
December 29, 2011 at 9:59 am
I need clarification.
Is this “cat poop” as in: The cat ate food and then pooped it?
– OR –
Did someone or something eat the cat, and then poop the cat out?
There IS a difference, people!
December 29, 2011 at 11:31 am
I do believe this is a “the cat ate food and then pooped it.” Otherwise it would have been listed as “pooped cat”. But you never know, some people disregard the listing rules.
December 29, 2011 at 11:54 am
Hey! “The item has been removed.” Does that mean it sold? Because I happen to live with a fat orange thing known as The Ultimate Poopin’ Machine. I need to trademark it so my buyers will know there is only ONE.
December 29, 2011 at 12:20 pm
An honest seller! “My product is… pure shit, really.”
December 29, 2011 at 2:28 pm
Last time I bought cat shit it was only in 2D.
December 29, 2011 at 3:06 pm
Damn it! I’ve got 7 cats, had I known the BBB would recognize me as a valid business I’d of started selling shit a long time ago.
December 29, 2011 at 4:30 pm
I have some extra cats.
Anyone want a cat poop dispenser?
One of my cats left me a mouse in my bed for Christmas… well, most of one. Aparrently the ass end was tastier than the mid section and head it left for me.
Just post your address and I’ll ship that poop dispenser right out to you, I’ll even cut holes in the box and stuff!
December 29, 2011 at 5:15 pm
No! The midsection and the head are THE tastiest parts, which is why it was left for you. I don’t have a cat, but I’ve been regaled with such stories by cat owners and the sentiment is always the same: They don’t understand why we don’t hunt for our food and they’re trying to teach us. Sure, we take cans and open them and, wa-lah!, tasty food is put into the cat’s dish, but nothing’s as satisfying as hunting down your own and enjoying it off the hoof, uh, foot, as it were. If you’re trying to teach someone to hunt, you’d leave the tastiest portions, to entice them to go find their own. Maybe you’ve found a live mouse running about the house? He’s there for you to practice chasing. I’m sure the cat chases along with you. It’s a bonding experience!
December 30, 2011 at 6:22 am
Mugsy, please don’t tell me why you know the head and mid section of a mouse are the tastiest parts.
I use the baby mice they catch to feed my bigger Bearded Dragon. It seems to like them.
December 31, 2011 at 11:52 am
@Dog Breath, I’m guessing. Honestly guessing. Maybe they’re not the tastiest—maybe the tush is the tastiest and that’s how they entice you to hunt…so you can get your own mouse and enjoy the tush for yourself. I know how parakeets and canaries think. I’m going on second-hand knowledge about the cats.
I have a question: Assuming you talk to one or more of your cats when you’re close to them, have you ever had a cat’s paw pressed against your mouth? I’ve had that happen with one or two cats I’ve known. Their owners swore it never happened to them. Maybe it’s a not-so-subtle way to tell me to shut up and go back to petting the cat.
A friend has a Bearded Dragon and an indoor cat, so she has to buy food for the dragon.
January 1, 2012 at 11:40 pm
Yes. I’ve always assumed the cat is trying to play with that weird opening with sounds coming out of it.
My cat also sometimes likes to start licking my chin, but I think that’s just because he likes the smell of my breath.
December 30, 2011 at 8:39 am
Or off the Nike Shoes….;) (Fans of Patti will understand…)
December 31, 2011 at 11:47 am
YES!!! The mice in their tiny Nike sneakers!! Thank you SO much for reminding me of that story. Still makes me giggle, no matter how many times I read or think of it.
December 30, 2011 at 6:04 am
I would have bought it if were 2D. I like retro.
December 30, 2011 at 8:28 pm
Level 4 Cat approved, I see.
January 2, 2012 at 11:26 am
I always tell my cats they need to earn their keep. Now I can just start selling their crap to buy them food so they can make more crap.
January 2, 2012 at 2:56 pm
It’s a sustainable, green business idea. *nods sagely*
January 2, 2012 at 7:25 pm
What presentation! Did he sift it before he laid it down? It looks so light and fluffy. I completely skipped the sifting step and my litter turned into a hard rock of cement. Recycle I must, and I am listing as we speak, my cat encased in carbonite litter on Etsy.
January 7, 2012 at 3:43 pm
Finally, a solution for the would-be cat hoarder who wants the disgusting mess but is allergic to cats.