Secret Santa
A while ago, I told you that I wanted to organize a pretty ambitious gift drive for any kids in the Regretsy community who might not get much otherwise. I know there are a lot of you just scraping by right now, and while that’s hard on everyone, it’s really tough to watch kids do without at a time when they should be looking forward to a little extra. So we set out to help about 100 of your children, and began taking applications several weeks ago.
The response was a little overwhelming. Your stories were truly heartbreaking, and we realized we would have to do more. So we doubled our list to 200 children, and now we’re ready to start playing Santa.
Here are a few of the kids in the Regretsy community that we’ll be assisting this year. These photos and stories were made available to us by the parents, and we are sharing them with permission.
This year, my father died after a battle with cancer. He and my little boy were very, very close. My son’s father pays little or nothing in child support, and ended up with everything in the divorce. We had to move in with my mother who has Alzheimers, because she cannot live alone. I know there are many children in need, and I’ve had to tell my son that there won’t be anything for Christmas this year except a few pairs of jeans he needs.
I was torn about submitting my children. I can’t afford to get them much as my husband is suffering through cancer (his doctor thinks he’s down to about 2 months, if his chemo goes well so at least we will have him here for the holidays).
His name is Rory, and he received a life-saving kidney transplant this past February, after three years on dialysis. In June, the nephrologists went back in and removed his two native kidneys, which ended up being a bigger surgery than the transplant. He has had a miserable year, full of pain and hospitals. Meanwhile, his dad and I have been struggling with INSANE medical bills – these two surgeries were not cheap, nor were they his only hospitalizations this year. Things have been really, really tight and if the Regretsy community wanted to adopt Rory, it would make our holiday.
My granddaughter is going to be 1 next week, and she is also very ill. Her liver is declining and she is likely to need a liver/intestine transplant. She’s not likely to survive (30-40% for surgery and 50% at the 5 year mark). I just want to give her a good Christmas.
I’ve started this email several times but haven’t had the nerve to send it. Heck, I may not send this one either. But we need help at Christmas. I don’t want anything for myself, I just want this first Christmas without their dad to not be interrupted. Every bit of help I can get is more than appreciated since I literally cannot do anything for them.
For Easter, we got them a wagon. They loved it (you can see in the pictures). It wasn’t an expensive wagon, just a cheap plastic one, but it was what we could afford. We have room to store it outside, but no way to lock it up. Well, less than a week later, some of the bigger kids in the neighborhood just broke the crap out of it. It was destroyed. The kids were in tears. We hoped they’d forget about it after a while, but they haven’t. They’ve been asking for another wagon for Christmas. We’d like to get them one, but we just can’t afford it.
I always to do something good at Christmas by harnessing the power of you fat bastards, and there is no doubt in my mind that this is the right thing to do this year.
But it’s a big job, and there was no way I could get something on this scale going by myself, especially with the book and the shipping and being out of town for 10 days. But thanks to the dedicated efforts Grimmlyn (our moderator in the Regretsy forums), we are finally ready to start this thing up.
Here’s what the families will get:
• A new toy or other gift that is as close to the child’s request as we can get. The toy will arrive unwrapped, so the family can have the pleasure of wrapping gifts, which is the best part.
• An extra gift from the Regretsy charity fund: Each child will get a personalized letter from Santa.
This drive will also provide paying administrative work for a few very deserving Etsy sellers in need, thereby assisting them in making a brighter holiday for their own families.
Here’s what we’re asking from you:
Because of the volume of purchases, we believe we can fill these Christmas wishes for less than $20 a child.
So we have about 1 week to raise $4,000. I have no doubt we will do that.
There are many, many people who read this site, and a very small gift from each of you would put this over the top in a very short time.
I really want this to work, because I believe it could be the blueprint for other, more ambitious programs we can implement for this community. Us assholes have to stick together.
Please consider making a gift to this worthwhile effort, and let’s start making Christmas special for some kids who could really use a break.
UPDATE: LOOK WHAT YOU ASSHOLES JUST DID
December 1, 2011 at 1:34 pm
Done and done. I’m tight on cash, too, after 9 months of spotty temp employment while trying to get Lad Named Felix up and running like a business, but, dammit…I have SOMETHING to spare. Lets do good work, bitches. XOXO
December 1, 2011 at 4:58 pm
I read this as, “trying to get laid”….
We should start a pool as to what time the goal is reached. The winner should get something from April…something personal like… A coffe mug for her house….
December 1, 2011 at 4:59 pm
*from
December 1, 2011 at 5:15 pm
Damn! We did it so fast?
Yay us!!
December 2, 2011 at 5:07 am
Is there any way to still contribute? After three years of tough times, I’ve somehow landed a good job. I’d really like to help.
December 1, 2011 at 1:37 pm
I have had a pretty terrible couple of days and this is the first time I’ve cried because something was GOOD. I love you fuckers.
December 1, 2011 at 1:40 pm
And can we please buy those kids a sweet Radio Flyer with a lock? And an invisible fence that shocks the shit out of the little bastards who destroyed the first one?
December 1, 2011 at 1:56 pm
Yes, a metal Radio Flyer, that can’t be busted up. And a Taser for the punks down the street.
December 1, 2011 at 1:57 pm
Yeah those kids that broke the wagon are shits who need a beating.
December 1, 2011 at 2:40 pm
The problem with the Radio Flyers is that they’re easy to dent, and they rust. A Little Tikes or Step 2 is what you want. They’re tough, think plastic, and could proably take a nuclear blast, and DEFINATELY take a couple of punk kids who need their asses kicked.
December 2, 2011 at 5:59 am
our kid’s little tykes wagon was used by neighbor-teenagers to ride down the hill drunk, and they bent the shit out of the caster/axle on one front side. So they aren’t indestructible either.
The wife would not allow me to beat them, but one day she won’t be looking.
December 2, 2011 at 6:13 am
Wow, they must have really punded that thing. But, one of the great things about the company (or at least used to be, maybe they don’t do this any more)is their replacement policy.
If your kids (or the drunk punks down the street) manage to destroy it, they’ll replace it.
December 2, 2011 at 6:16 am
Oh and if you get her a nice box of Gevalia Chocolate Liquors, and a sleeping mask, she won’t be looking.
December 1, 2011 at 3:37 pm
YES! They are on my list for one metal wagon! I am so excited about the project and teary-eyed from all the wonderful people who are helping!
December 1, 2011 at 5:12 pm
I was thinking that was what they needed. I donated too. I can donate some stuff from my shop too.
December 1, 2011 at 7:23 pm
Dang it! I’ve been home all day (daughter’s 18 month dr. appointment) and haven’t had a chance to check for new posts since earlier this afternoon.
I wanted to donate! Is there a way I still can, even if you’ve already funded it? I want to contribute in some way.
Much love and all that rot,
Dana
December 1, 2011 at 3:49 pm
Just donated and it feels wonderful…thanks April for doing this for the kids! The donation I made is on behalf of me and my kids who have been saved by grinching out completely by Dominick the Donkey. We don’t have a lot, but we live in Australia where we have free healthcare and won’t face the situation that people find themselves in when they are ill or injured like your worthy recipients.
December 1, 2011 at 7:44 pm
Circlette-Thank you for being so kind to us Yanks! We love Aussies!
December 2, 2011 at 7:25 pm
Thanks Pie!!! Of course it’s a pleasure, we think of ourselves as being from “The lucky country” – and I’m lucky to live here!
December 1, 2011 at 1:40 pm
This.
All week I have been stressing but this broke me. I can only afford a small something but it’s better than nothing (I hope). Merry Christmas all!
December 1, 2011 at 1:43 pm
I throwing some of my saving into the pool. At least for today, I am a little better off than these kids. Today I pay it forward.
December 1, 2011 at 3:04 pm
I gave a bit, though it’s tight as hell here, too. No kid should be without at least a little something fun on Christmas morning.
December 1, 2011 at 7:48 pm
Or on Winter Solstice!
December 1, 2011 at 1:59 pm
This week has sucked balls for me. Our family dog died suddenly, the winds in California damaged my house and I have no power so all of my food is defrosting. Waaa, poor me. Fuck that! Let’s do something for these kids. In fact, maybe this will sweeten the deal. I will donate a portion of any sales of my weasel pendants to this cause. $2 each.
December 1, 2011 at 2:03 pm
Weasel pendants?? Where are those?
December 1, 2011 at 2:08 pm
Look at her store under “Regretsy”
December 1, 2011 at 3:35 pm
Thank you, Lundy…
December 1, 2011 at 2:06 pm
Perhaps a link: http://www.etsy.com/listing/87330586/made-to-order-regretsy-weasel-polymer
December 1, 2011 at 3:58 pm
Ooh – Maybe I’ll donate AND buy the weasel.
December 1, 2011 at 4:00 pm
Is it just me, or does “buy the weasel” sound like a euphemism for a sex act? Not an exciting one, though. As in, “My husband and I thought about going out to a movie, but instead we just stayed in and bought the weasel.”
December 1, 2011 at 4:09 pm
yes, please. That’s like double-donating!
December 1, 2011 at 7:13 pm
Done and done. Donating and buying, that is – not the sex act. Sadly.
December 1, 2011 at 4:38 pm
So I changed this up a bit: 10% of all sales to be donated to this fund, 20% if from my Regretsy section. I love you f j l’s so damn much my heart is beating again.
December 2, 2011 at 3:46 pm
Oh, I am so sorry to hear about you losing your sweet doggie. I know how very hard that is.
December 1, 2011 at 2:48 pm
I’ve had a craptastic week – and this is just awesome. Wish I could send a whole box of stuff to a family. Which I could – if I had their address. But – on a side note – donated!
December 1, 2011 at 1:38 pm
I donated what I could. I love you assholes. Thank you for making this happen.
December 1, 2011 at 1:38 pm
I so want to help! This is such a worthy cause! My daughter has an Etsy shop as well, and we are both super happy to help, just tell us how!
December 1, 2011 at 1:39 pm
AWESOME SAUCE!!! You are a true Angel HKpril!
December 1, 2011 at 1:39 pm
donated and am local in LA and willing to help shop or whatever…
December 1, 2011 at 1:39 pm
Thank goodness tomorrow is payday.
I’m a teary mess now.
December 1, 2011 at 2:20 pm
Sarah Mclachlan’s got nothing on April.
December 1, 2011 at 4:10 pm
Glad I’m not the only one with that playing in my head.
December 1, 2011 at 1:40 pm
This post made me tear up a little. And then donate ten bucks. It’s not a lot, but I hope it can make a kid happy this Christmas.
December 1, 2011 at 1:40 pm
Won’t someone think of the children!?!
Oh wait, you did. My crappy little etsy store finally turned something resembling a profit, and I dumped it into the Regretsy secret santa donation bin. I mean, etsy stores aren’t allowed to be profitable, that’s absurd!
December 1, 2011 at 3:28 pm
Ok, I wouldn’t normally pimp my shop in the comments, but clearly this is for a good cause.
$10 of every Hamsa Hand necklace I sell until I run out or they stop taking donations will go to the Regretsy Secret Santa Fund.
http://www.etsy.com/listing/79260345/hamsa-hand-necklace-donation
December 1, 2011 at 3:30 pm
p.s. I totally stole this idea from TypicalGirl, so you know, buy from her as well!
http://www.etsy.com/listing/87476726/donation-lazy-heart-raku-trinket-dishes
December 1, 2011 at 4:48 pm
Your marine-themed jewelry made me think of my dad. He was in the Merchant Marine during WWII (he was nearly 50 b/f he got married and they had me), then the Coast Guard, then came ashore and was an insurance broker. But he always loved the water, and boats, and the Navy scattered his ashes for us just outside San Francisco Bay. Thanks for the thoughts.
December 1, 2011 at 5:46 pm
That’s awesome! My grandfather was in the Merchant Marine during WWII, and now my brother is. The ocean runs in our family’s blood. That, and liquor.
December 1, 2011 at 1:40 pm
I couldn’t afford to send much, but I sent what I could. If sales start to pick up in my Etsy shop, I’ll be sending more.
December 1, 2011 at 1:41 pm
Done. Not just because I’m drunk on cheap red wine either. Well, actually maybe it was. But win win!
December 1, 2011 at 1:41 pm
It’s not much, but it’s what I could give right now.
December 1, 2011 at 1:41 pm
No, I am NOT sobbing uncontrollably right now at my desk. (wipes snot on sleeve and donates money)
December 1, 2011 at 1:45 pm
I am!…also not doing that?
December 1, 2011 at 1:41 pm
I’m sponsoring three kids. I don’t have kids. I don’t have pets. Oh, and my friends are all getting $10 gifts this year, so that’s kinda like having extra change in my pocket right? Enjoy future fat fuckers.
December 1, 2011 at 1:42 pm
I’m glad you posted this here, because I didn’t even realize we HAD forums, so I NEVER would have seen it! I’ll be glad to help out what I can!
December 1, 2011 at 1:45 pm
I don’t follow the forums either. In fact, I’m not totally sure what they look like. LOL.
December 1, 2011 at 1:53 pm
Chaos, anarchy, and NSFW. It’s beautiful.
December 1, 2011 at 1:44 pm
I would love to make some stuffed animals for some kids.
December 1, 2011 at 1:44 pm
Done! It’s so sad that a lot of these families are in the red because of medical bills; says something about the state of healthcare today.
December 1, 2011 at 1:55 pm
people who don’t know me well are always hassling me about why i choose to live in england instead of moving back to america. with all the medical attention i end up needing the idea is absurd.
i miss my family, but i just can’t afford it.
December 1, 2011 at 9:40 pm
I really cannot get my funny little Australian head around the American health care system.
It’s in everybody’s interest to make health care more “free” (by paying for it with taxes like a Medicare levy). People make companies more money when they don’t have to stay home or limp around work.
All these people suffering because they were dealt a bad card health-wise just angers me. Even more than all the “buy this insurance so your kids won’t even have to pay for your funeral” ads that run during the day. Grrrr. Let me give you all money.
December 1, 2011 at 1:44 pm
Donated! Going to crap out a terrible flyer with my artistic ability & hang on the awesome University of Hawaii @ Hilo billboards!
December 1, 2011 at 1:45 pm
I don’t even celebrate christmas but I’m totally in.
Bonus points for posing the kids in front of barnwood!
December 1, 2011 at 5:36 pm
I’m so glad another person was amused by the barnwood backdrop. It’s like a shibboleth proving they’re ours!
December 1, 2011 at 1:45 pm
This is the first time I’ve actually had enough in a bank account to donate. And people say we’re heartless slags.
December 1, 2011 at 1:46 pm
Can we make something also? I could probably muster a stuffed animal someone wouldn’t entirely hate. I get paid in just a couple days and will donate then, but I want to start making something now.
December 1, 2011 at 4:40 pm
Originally I wanted to just buy handmade stuff for these kids, but there were legal issues and liabilities I couldn’t take on. Plus the scale was just too huge, and we couldn’t inspect every toy.
December 1, 2011 at 1:46 pm
Absolutely donated. We don’t have a lot ourselves, but we have each other and all that sappy shit. Plus thanks to smart shopping, watching sales, credit cards and some decent luck the kids are going to have enough to make it an enjoyable holiday.
Come on bitches open those wallets! And keep us updated on the progress!
December 1, 2011 at 1:46 pm
You got my donation too. Give these kids some Christmas, or Kwanzaa, or whatever’s hip this year.
December 1, 2011 at 1:46 pm
I’m a broke college student myself but I gave what I could. I’m sure it will help. I’ve got 5 little cousins with no dad to help give them the Christmas they deserve, but we’re blessed to have a big enough family to help provide them with a good Christmas. I’m glad to be able to help out others that aren’t as lucky.
December 1, 2011 at 1:48 pm
It humbles me that this group of jealous losers can pull something amazing like this together. While I can’t donate much, I’m willing to help anyway I possibly can. The Regretsy community rocks my fucking socks off! Now excuse me while I go find a tissue.
December 1, 2011 at 1:48 pm
Also – if the best part is wrapping the gifts yourself, I’d like to share the “joy” of wrapping shit with anyone who’s interested. I don’t pay, and the conditions are horrible, but it’s the best part right? Just let me know when to expect the wrapping brigade to show up.
December 1, 2011 at 1:54 pm
Where do you live? I’d happily curse your presents while I wrap them for your family. Or the guy that hides the bodies. Whatever.
December 1, 2011 at 2:46 pm
This reminds me of the things people say when they give handmade items…”made with love, or every stitch made with love.” I give people things and tell them that there’s a swear word in every stitch.
December 1, 2011 at 2:00 pm
True story, I love wrapping presents. I was always anal about it but it went to a whole new level after I did gift wrap at Macys. Now my problem is that I am so concerned with tight corners and as few visible seams as possible that it takes me about 20min a present.
December 1, 2011 at 2:53 pm
I would love to be somewhere to help wrapping, too, if it was necessary. When my sister and I were little, my mom set up a box full of old gift wrap and ribbons for us to play at wrapping with; since then, I’ve even volunteered to help wrap at a large bookstore all day Christmas Eve to help raise funds for a charity. I LOVE wrapping gifts. So Grimmlyn, if any wrapping is needed in the metro D.C. area, let me know, please!
December 1, 2011 at 2:54 pm
Oh, and I’ve made a donation, but am hoping to be able to make another later this week. Those letters broke my heart.
December 1, 2011 at 5:48 pm
I’m another wrapping enthusiast. LOVE it! Love making them pretty. Growing up, I wrapped pretty much all the gifts in my house, even some that were for me that were put in boxes. I’d be more than willing to wrap presents for anyone who doesn’t want to/isn’t able to wrap theirs. I’m in SC, on I-85 about halfway between Charlotte and Atlanta, if those areas are pertinent.
December 1, 2011 at 1:48 pm
Well shit. This post managed to make me donate money AND create an account (which miraculously ive never done even though ive read every single post since the start.)
Excited to be a part of this. And yeah… those kids need a damn wagon. And maybe a long-distance taser for the parents to use on the neighbor kids.
December 1, 2011 at 1:48 pm
Donated! Woudl love to know how to donate the wagon! I’d be happy to buy a nice, metal radio flyer.
December 1, 2011 at 1:48 pm
YAY! THis is the kind of holiday insanity I can get behind. :- )
December 1, 2011 at 1:49 pm
I teared up several times while reading this. (Yeah, I’m a pussy. So what?)
It’s gonna be fuck hard for me to, due to having EVERYTHING due money-wise this week, but I’ll try my damnedest to make a (probably very small)donation tonight once my paycheck hits my account.
December 1, 2011 at 1:50 pm
Done and Done. Bless all of you friendless bastards!
December 1, 2011 at 1:50 pm
Donation made.
Is there a place we can see the total? I’ll try to donate more in the unlikely event the goal isn’t being reached.
December 1, 2011 at 1:55 pm
I do that too.
December 1, 2011 at 1:50 pm
I could only afford to send, like, five bucks, but hell, we’re in the hundred thousands, right? If even a fifth of them send five bucks…
December 1, 2011 at 1:50 pm
You had me at the bit about the children and their wagon. Damn bigger kids.
December 1, 2011 at 1:53 pm
THIS. Nothing riles my ire more than older punkass kids ruining things little kids.
December 1, 2011 at 1:56 pm
Those fuckers (bigger kids) tried to break my trampoline too. Still holding a grudge.
December 1, 2011 at 2:47 pm
Big kids stole my pogo stick when I was little. I’m still heartbroken. Damn big bullies!
December 1, 2011 at 3:35 pm
A big kid tried to steal my violin off me once, and I beat him with my umbrella. He left my violin alone.
December 1, 2011 at 3:56 pm
Not only are you awesome for umbrella beatdownage, but also for the SatW Denmark icon! Beer Ghost!
December 1, 2011 at 4:09 pm
And thank you
Once I got suspended from school for being involved in a fight (I was beaten up, but didn’t fight back because I didn’t want to get in trouble), Dad told me that if I was going to get suspended anyway, I should fight back next time it happened. <3 Dad.
December 1, 2011 at 3:20 pm
Bigger kids broke my hula hoop too! >:[
December 1, 2011 at 1:51 pm
The wagon story broke me. I had my husband read this post and asked if we could give, and he agreed (not that I really thought he’d say no after reading that). Thank you for doing this.
December 1, 2011 at 5:06 pm
Dammit, dammit. I should NOT have read through 130 more comments. I’ve already cried once over this, and now I’m festively appropriate as Rudolph the Red-Nosed Fat Jealous Loser. I seriously <3 you guys. But I need a drink and to stop reading this sappy bullshit. Dammit.
December 1, 2011 at 1:51 pm
Christmas is hard for so many people, but we “adults” can understand the reasons why. Kids can’t. I am honored to be part of such a caring, goatse-loving group.
December 1, 2011 at 1:51 pm
Donating! Thanks to some of the awesome CF4L folks who bought some yarn from my shop, I have a positive PayPal balance.
( Shameless plug: I still have some yarn left. http://haleystudio.etsy.com ) Update: My husband had two phone interviews today so we hope he lands a job soon.
December 1, 2011 at 2:56 pm
I’m one of the fat jealous losers who bought some of her yarn, and I can attest to the fact that it’s really nice. It’ll make a great Christmas gift for someone, too.
Sending good thoughts that your husband gets a job ASAP, haleystudio!
December 1, 2011 at 3:39 pm
You’re so awesome.
December 1, 2011 at 4:56 pm
I just ordered some buttons from you. My plain black knitting bag is amassing a collection!
December 1, 2011 at 1:51 pm
Added $40.00 to the pot. Hope all these kids can have a great Christmas.
December 1, 2011 at 1:54 pm
Woo! Go you!
I love Regretsy charity, because you know every dollar you spend is going towards an INDIVIDUAL in need…not some huge “charity” with fancy advertising and employees to pay.
December 1, 2011 at 2:10 pm
This soooo so much
December 1, 2011 at 1:51 pm
I had to stop reading because the tears were coming and I’m getting ready to leave the house…so I just skipped to the bottom so I could donate a little something. Can’t wait to hear about how happy these kids are going to be on Christmas morning! (Or that Jew-holiday that I can never spell correctly. You know the one I mean.)
December 1, 2011 at 1:54 pm
hee hee. The thing I love about Hanukkah is that pretty much any combination of the letters is acceptable somewhere. My current favorite is Channukkah because it uses the most letters.
December 1, 2011 at 2:11 pm
Same here. XD
December 1, 2011 at 4:31 pm
Happy Christmakwanzakkahvus is what we use, it’s all encompassing.
December 1, 2011 at 5:39 pm
Yes-Kwanzaa! Or, as my half-senile, all-crazy mother likes to call it, Swanzaa.
And whatever other December holidays I’m missing. Wouldn’t want to leave anyone out. Sensitive bastards.
December 1, 2011 at 1:52 pm
I love this idea! I don’t have much to give, but I just HAD to donate a little bit. I know we can reach the goal, even fat jealous losers can’t resist making a child smile!
December 1, 2011 at 7:19 pm
Hear, hear. This drive is over, but I’m going to make a donation to my women’s shelter in the general spirit of this thread. We don’t have great cash flow, but we’ve got enough for our Christmas, and to help someone else’s, too.
December 1, 2011 at 1:52 pm
Thanks for making it Paypal compatible. I threw some of my etsy profits to the cause. I am predicting you will have a surplus in this fund.
December 1, 2011 at 1:52 pm
Done. I know what it’s like to have a shitty Christmas, and I think you kind of rock for doing something for the kids.
December 1, 2011 at 1:53 pm
Oh, and thanks for making me cry.
December 1, 2011 at 1:53 pm
Done, shared and tweeted.
Also donating $10 from each of these to the cause…
http://www.etsy.com/listing/87476726/donation-lazy-heart-raku-trinket-dishes
December 1, 2011 at 3:23 pm
Oooohhh… I have sooo many trinket dishes, but absolutely LOVE raku. Bookmarked to come back on the weekend to see if anything catches my fancy for the gift giving festivities.
December 1, 2011 at 1:53 pm
You know, if I couldn’t have managed to spare at least as much as I’ve already spent on myself this holiday season… Well, I’d be an even more worthless bastard than I am. Done.
December 1, 2011 at 1:54 pm
Donated
I can’t afford much, but if I can help one kid, then I feel good about that.
December 1, 2011 at 1:54 pm
$20 donated – more coming after I get my next paycheck. I live at home for free, and these kids need my money a lot more than I do.
December 1, 2011 at 1:54 pm
As soon as my hubby’s company pays him his overdue paycheck (stupid, lazy, bastards)I’m kicking in. Cuz at least we’ve got a paycheck coming. And in the spirit of the season: I remember when Regretsy was all about snark and jealous loser-ing. Now you’re trying to make us cry and be generous and stuff. Uncool.
My gift to you all is my FLOUNCE!
December 1, 2011 at 1:55 pm
Right, my kids’ father has turned into a complete fucking arse and seems to be out to ruin christmas, but my kids will have presents, even if I am feeling vaguely homicidal. Very happy to give something to those who won’t. x
December 1, 2011 at 1:55 pm
Threw in a bit to the pot. The Ginger has an interview next week, so things are looking up a little for us. Plus the only “kid” I have to shop for is grey, furry, weighs 17 lbs and will be thrilled to get kibble and bat ornaments off the tree.
December 1, 2011 at 5:00 pm
Sounds like one of our three furkids. Only he’s getting awfully close to 20 lbs and likes to be a lap cat. On me. Did I mention I’m 5’1″?
December 1, 2011 at 1:56 pm
I think my heart just grew three sizes.
That can’t be good.
December 1, 2011 at 4:24 pm
Cardiomegaly. They have a procedure that’ll help with that.
December 1, 2011 at 1:56 pm
I remember back the 80s, the newspapers would have a few little sections for families who were down on their luck to ask for help, so that their kids could have at least a half decent Christmas. With the event of the internet and us fat jealous slags, we can now help these families on a much bigger scale. Even if the donations are only $5-10, they will go a long way!
I would much rather spend any extra cash I have helping these kids, than standing in line like a tool at Walmart trying to buy some cheap made in China bullshit.
Lets focus whats important this year and help out these kids (and animals too, the rescues also need help) have a decent Xmas, Hanukkah, Kwanza, and Festivus for the rest of us.
December 1, 2011 at 2:27 pm
People always forget about Chrimbus
December 1, 2011 at 1:56 pm
Wishing those kiddos the best Christmas ever. Regretsy people have such big hearts. Thanks for spearheading the efforts, April.
December 1, 2011 at 1:57 pm
Donated, and I may do it again, ’cause I’m easy like Sunday morning. Yes Virginia, there is a Sanity Clause. I may be fat, but you reminded me I am also mighty blessed. Ho Ho Ho~ing in your general direction April and your elvish legion.
December 1, 2011 at 1:57 pm
Having a massively shitty week, but this post put it in perspective. While everything else is falling apart, you made me thankful that I have a home, and food, and money to pay my medical bills.
I hope you little motherfuckers have an amazing Christmas.
C.F.4.L.
December 1, 2011 at 1:57 pm
$50 from this college kid coming your way. You guys rock and roll.
December 1, 2011 at 1:58 pm
Just sent an e-mail to my family and (once I figure out how to use PayPal) will be making a donation myself.
Kudos, Mrs. Killer.
December 1, 2011 at 1:58 pm
Well I don’t know about anyone else but I love starting the month of December in tears! What an amazing opportunity to pay it forward. As a mom, I can’t imagine not being able to give my daughters a Christmas, hopefully the money I’ve donated can help a few kids out
Thanks April.
December 1, 2011 at 1:58 pm
If we can’t raise at least $4,000, then we have no right to call ourselves fat jealous losers. Here’s to earning that right!
December 1, 2011 at 2:00 pm
I’ve never encountered a place that wasn’t my own home where I could simultaneously be an asshole and prove that I am possession of a working heart. I hope what I gave shows a little bit of my gratitude.
Happy Holidays to all of you fantastic, snarky bitches. xo
December 1, 2011 at 2:00 pm
This is an awesome thing to do. Shows we’re not such a nasty bunch after all……. okay, we are! I’ll be doing my part and donating.
December 1, 2011 at 2:02 pm
Donated a small amount, because my pay doesn’t go in for another 6 days, but will try to donate a bit more next week
This is an excellent thing you’re doing.
Can everyone just move to Australia? Our healthcare is pretty good (even if our immigration laws suck a tad).
December 1, 2011 at 4:03 pm
Us Aussies might whinge about paying the gap for a doctor’s visit, but until I started reading forums like this, I had no idea how bad it was in the US with healthcare. No child should go without xmas pressies because their parents had to pay ridiculous amounts of money for medical expenses.
Also, PLEEEEEASE April come visit Down-Under as your next project. I promise to throw a fucking kangaroo on the barbie… pfft to moose burgers!
December 1, 2011 at 5:54 pm
My psych costs me $140 a session, but I get $85 of that back thanks to Medicare. And my current doctor is a bulk-billing one. We really have a lot to be thankful for here.
And I agree! We need a Regretsy Downunder visit
Come to Melbourne to see the half-built Ferris wheel that’s been plagued with problems since day one! And my office building that looks like an optical illusion and hurts your eyes if you stare at it for too long! And my favourite thing: The cow upside down in a tree.
December 1, 2011 at 2:02 pm
Donation done. I. Can’t. Stop. Crying. I mean it this might have been the last straw. I can’t take any more.I’m glad you all are doing this. Maybe there’s a glimmer of hope?
December 1, 2011 at 2:14 pm
December 1, 2011 at 2:39 pm
That’s a sweet kitty!
December 1, 2011 at 2:05 pm
I decided to opt out of the Secret Santa at work. I’m tired of receiving thoughtless crap that I neither need nor will use. If those fools paid *any* attention at all, they’d know to buy me alcohol instead of green tea or hot chocolate mix!!!
I think you will put my $15 to a far better use. I’ll donate it as soon as I find that box of kleenex….
p.s. I still have my red wagon, I’m 53.
December 1, 2011 at 2:09 pm
Those Secret Santas some work offices have make me rage. Why not pool the money to help a charity instead of buying your co worker a fish necktie or some obnoxious crap from Spencers?
Good for you for opting out.
December 1, 2011 at 5:06 pm
One place I worked, instead of Secret Santa, we adopted a family for the holidays. It was so much fun to plan out what we were giving, and everyone got something,plus a supermarket gift card. I remember stuffing a pair of warm gloves in a little parka and zipping the pockets up as a surprise. The little guy wanted one toy and a coat, and if he needed a coat, he needed gloves.
My husband’s job doesn’t do Secret Santa either. They have a giving tree for a local charity in their lobby. Every tag gets taken, every year.
December 1, 2011 at 7:10 pm
One of our company divisions does that too, and our company as a whole donates money to different local charities on behalf of each of our geographically dispersed divisions. No Secret Santas for us, and that makes me happy.
What doesn’t make me happy is that I completely missed out on the opportunity to add my $$ to this wonderful cause due to being stuck in Thursday Night Football traffic. I want to donate too!!
December 1, 2011 at 2:31 pm
I’ve been in charge of the Secret Santa at work the last few years, and this year I finally gave out a list of all sorts of things so we all get something we can actually use. I also work with a lot of awesome people, so it’s fun. If it weren’t, I wouldn’t do it either.
December 1, 2011 at 2:05 pm
A big thanks to you guys behind the scenes doing the grunt work to make this happen. It’s easy for us lazy losers to put down the Jack & Coke for 30 second to click and donate, but having the Loser Infantry on the ground to run it makes the world go round.
December 1, 2011 at 2:27 pm
Agreed, FeintPrays. Thanks to Grimmlyn and April and everyone else making this happen!
December 1, 2011 at 2:30 pm
Oh, and I’m sending over my two boys to beat up the wagon busters. Now THAT’S a gift!
December 1, 2011 at 2:05 pm
I just like many of the other fat, jealous losers here don’t have much, especially since being laid off a few months ago. Selling on etsy and ebay is all that’s keeping us surviving here, but I know we’re still fairing better than others – so hell yes, absolutely we’ve donated what we can to help.
December 1, 2011 at 2:05 pm
I’m getting all teary in a Starbucks right now. The power is out at home (April, you missed out on a rough night last night).
I would donate if I could. As it is, I wasn’t sure how I’d buy my nephew anything for Christmas this year, and I missed his birthday last month. Thank goodness today a former classmate offered to buy one of my textbooks, or he’d be without on Christmas too. Everyone else is getting bread.
December 1, 2011 at 2:22 pm
Consider your donation covered, Lady Kwake. Your post just moved me to double my donation.
December 1, 2011 at 2:55 pm
Yeah, but Kwake, we all know you make AMAZING bread. They’re lucky to get it.
December 1, 2011 at 4:21 pm
What Pickle said. AMAZING BREAD! I’ll try to throw in a couple of extra bucks in your honor, Ellie. xoxo
December 1, 2011 at 7:18 pm
OMG, you guys are amazing. I hadn’t teared up yet, but that almost made me.
December 1, 2011 at 2:07 pm
Last night, I found out my car was towed and I had a ticket. The whole thing is costing me $284. I was only able to donate $10 to this – I hope that’s enough to help. I’ve always had a comfortable life and even though things are financially tough for me, it’s nothing compared to these kiddos. Thank you so much for doing this – I can’t imagine what it will mean to them, and to their families.
(yes, yes, the crying… I haz it)
December 1, 2011 at 2:07 pm
Damnit! I can’t be snarky when I’m teary. Good on ya HK! Great thing to do.
December 1, 2011 at 2:07 pm
I just kicked in $20. Screw it, my little brother didn’t need a gift this year anyway.
I love all you bastards for doing this.
December 1, 2011 at 2:07 pm
You can thank the government for my donation, because it’s coming out of the school loans that i live off of in vet school. But this is a tiny amount compared to my vet school debt, and I’ll survive without a meal out next week or something to make up for it.
I feel like you have to give during the Christmas season…or you’re missing part of the point of it. Plus, totally worth another meal of ramen noodles to know that some kid out there is getting a Christmas gift.
December 1, 2011 at 2:08 pm
Thank you so much. Donated. I love random acts of…this. <3
December 1, 2011 at 2:08 pm
dropped in a tiny amount, but hopefully it will help! I remember what poor Christmas are.
December 1, 2011 at 2:09 pm
This is awesome
I will donate as soon asap.
December 1, 2011 at 2:10 pm
See what you did there, I was so distracted by good stuff that I wrote like an idiot.
December 1, 2011 at 2:19 pm
I’m distracted easily, but I always write like an idiot X)
December 1, 2011 at 2:55 pm
Heh, I was just happy to have an excuse for that one!
December 1, 2011 at 2:09 pm
I donated everything in my paypal except what I need to ship and order tomorrow. Until they stop taking donations I will keep putting any profits I get from my sales into donations. So buy my stuff so I can donate more. My shop is http://www.etsy.com/shop/heathersteas
December 1, 2011 at 2:10 pm
Ah fuck, long time UK fan here, this shit finally got me to register just to say how awesome I think this is….tears and everything (that might be the wine to be fair), and feeling so fucking lucky that I can give my daughter what she wants this Christmas, like all these kids and their families deserve. I’ll donate what I can and spread the word. Nice one Regretsy.
December 1, 2011 at 2:10 pm
I was almost tempted to sign up for this for my kids but knew that there must be people worse off than me – and I was right. I don’t have much but I gave what I could because fuck – kids don’t deserve a shitty Christmas.
December 1, 2011 at 2:10 pm
Ugh I had a computer malfunction and my comment I went to post disappeared forever.
I was only able to donate $10. My car was towed yesterday, and the total with the ticket is $284. So, yeah, I can’t put in much. I hope this helps. And I hope that this gives happiness to the kiddos and comfort to their families and I’m going to start bawling at work and I love all of you, you secretly wonderful internet folk.
December 1, 2011 at 2:11 pm
This is so great. I was a “poor kid” because my dad was a drunken loser. I never knew that Santa was actually my aunts and uncles who generously (and anonymously) bought bikes, toys and even our Christmas tree every year for many years. Kids don’t need to wonder why Santa liked their friends more than them. Heading for the Kleenex box.
December 1, 2011 at 4:22 pm
ok, that did it. heart officially melted. what the fuck am I to do now?
December 1, 2011 at 4:23 pm
I know, I’ll open up my $2 to anything in the store. You buy, I’ll donate. Let’s keep it growing, folks.
December 1, 2011 at 2:11 pm
I donated my lunch money. Lord knows it won’t hurt my fat ass to go without today.
December 1, 2011 at 2:13 pm
$100.00 from this disgruntled lawyer. If a minion of Satan can donate, so can you!
December 1, 2011 at 2:18 pm
Today I will amend my Shakespeare Quote of “Kill all the lawyers” to “Kill most of the lawyers and send the remaining lawyers the other lawyers’ things”
December 1, 2011 at 2:22 pm
I work for attorneys! I knew there were other good ones out there.
December 1, 2011 at 4:24 pm
Me, too, steph.
December 1, 2011 at 2:49 pm
I’ll raise you a $100 Checazzo and I’m retired. Let’s have a contest. If you contribute another $100, I’ll raise mine to $300. Come on, you can do it!
December 2, 2011 at 10:49 am
Leeta – OK. I’ll donate another $100.00, but since this fund is already “funded”, as Helen Killer posted, I’ll do so for the next charity drive she posts. I’ll watch out for you in the comments on that day
December 2, 2011 at 3:36 pm
You’re awesome. I’ll be there, see you then.
December 1, 2011 at 4:50 pm
It was my husband (also a lawyer) who suggested we give $100 when I had him read the post. They’re (you’re) not ALL bad!
December 1, 2011 at 2:16 pm
Hope you guys are happy. I had to dip into today’s booze money. :[
December 1, 2011 at 2:16 pm
I love this idea. My purse strings are tight right now but I gave a small amount, every little bit counts. I mean, it was either that or buy Christmas presents for my cats, and they are more than happy to just eat tinsel off the tree and poop glitter. Happy Holidays, losers!
December 1, 2011 at 3:56 pm
Then you can hang the glitter-poop back on the tree and complete the holiday recycle cycle!
I just sent my little donation, and can’t wait to see how big the glittery pile of f.j.l. love will grow.
December 1, 2011 at 7:01 pm
Yes!! And then I’ll place my tree in front of some distressed wood and take a picturefor you all!
December 1, 2011 at 2:17 pm
Done x 2.
I buy a lot of stupid shit for myself, I can go the rest of the week without.
December 1, 2011 at 2:19 pm
Donated! Got my first credit card last week, and this was the first thing I used it for
December 1, 2011 at 2:24 pm
Ugh I sound like a teenager but I’m a homeowner who got my first ‘credit-debit’ card so I can buy shit off the internet now. And woohoo now I can go buy crap from Etsy!
December 1, 2011 at 2:20 pm
My boys chose to donate some of their money to this. And when I shared this on Facebook several of my friends donated too!
Max wanted to donate a $100K for a wagon but alas his birthday money wouldn’t cover it.
December 1, 2011 at 4:22 pm
That is super sweet! Tell them that I said thank you and let them know that Santa really appreciates the help!
December 1, 2011 at 5:56 pm
Man, that would be one badass wagon! Maybe a Radio Flyer that actually flies?
December 1, 2011 at 2:21 pm
The first photo, of children on barn wood, inspired me to donate. I’ll buy anything if it’s photographed on barn wood.
Seriously, you fat slags are the best.
December 1, 2011 at 2:27 pm
I had a few “little food, no gifts” Christmases when I was a kid, and now that I’m in a better spot in my life I feel really lucky to be able to help support some deserving kids.
I hope we get to hear of some of the disgustingly cute Christmas mornings these kids have!
December 1, 2011 at 2:28 pm
There were 7 of us kids, and my little brother needed several surgeries. Lots of our stuff came from Goodwill or the Salvation Army.
After years of making the small payments they could afford, in 1959, my folks got a Christmas card from the pharmacist with their account card inside, marked “PAID IN FULL”. It was a huge amount for him to write off back then. So I sent you $50, and I know my Mom and Dad are smiling at me.
December 1, 2011 at 5:10 pm
And the pharmacist. What a wonderful man!
December 1, 2011 at 6:05 pm
OK, now you’ve done it. My eyes were resolutely dry until I read about the pharmacist. Now I’m getting snotty at work. Thanks a bunch.
Donated.
December 1, 2011 at 2:29 pm
To be honest, Christmas around here really fucking sucks. I just lost my mother and my grandfather within a very short time period of each other, and on top of not being exactly full of cheer, I have two extremely nasty funeral bills to help with.
So i’m not celebrating Christmas this year, and I can’t afford anything. But I sent you money anyway. I just want you to know that even though it was a small donation, I really, genuinely hope it helps give someone a happy holiday and a merry Christmas, and I wish I could send more.
December 1, 2011 at 2:30 pm
We went to a “cut your own tree” farm and found that for the pleasure of doing their work for them and cutting down our own tree we would pay $90 for a 5.5 foot tree. So we went to lowes, paid less than half, and the kidlets will get the money we saved from the “you pay us $60 to cut your tree farm”
December 1, 2011 at 2:32 pm
I wish I could get through one day this week without crying at least twice. My mom just called and goes “What’s wrong” as I’m sniffling and all I could say is “I want those kids to have a wagon.” I’ll call her and explain later.
I can’t donate until my paycheck clears, but tomorrow every extra cent I can spare will be in this fund.
December 1, 2011 at 2:45 pm
I had a similar experience, but I was sobbing it to my cat. He was unsympathetic. I just want those kids to have a wagon, too. And a lock.
December 1, 2011 at 3:45 pm
What they really need is a shed…with a lock. Or an older brother who was just released from prison and isn’t afraid to go back.
This whole wagon story is bringing out all sorts of different sides of me.
December 3, 2011 at 4:32 pm
I was grinning with tears in my eyes reading some of these comments, and your “and is’t afraid to go back” quip had me laughing/snotting everywhere (CAUTION: do not burst out laughing if you’re mid-way through crying with a cold). You guys are amazing.
December 1, 2011 at 10:45 pm
Darn, donations are closed. After doing some budgeting, I have about $30 to spare this week. I know there’s got to be some people in the same boat as me who didn’t get to donate. Even if we can’t help out the Regretsy family this year, I challenge all those people to take that money to your local Toys for Tots or other Christmas charity in your area. There’s more kids who are sick and more wagons that need to be bought.
December 1, 2011 at 2:32 pm
I’m a single Mom who’s been working 8.5 hour days the past few weeks… and I actually got a decent paycheque this week (woo hoo). Chucking in $50 for the kids!
December 1, 2011 at 2:36 pm
I had to lie to my boss that I’m crying because I just remembered that today was my dead grandma’s birthday…count me in. Not only is it a great cause, but I’ve evened out the karma balance for my lie.
December 1, 2011 at 2:38 pm
First time poster. Had to donate and thank you for organizing this.
December 1, 2011 at 2:42 pm
Thank you April for the opportunity to give to those in need. I’m not buying any gifts this year unless it provides something that someone truly needs. I know what it’s like to have nothing, not even food, at Christmas and then Angels showed up. That was a long time ago, but one should not forget. Big hugs and love to you for being one of God’s angels. (Geez, I know this is sappy, but give an older lady a break. lol)
December 1, 2011 at 2:42 pm
Donating in memory of our sweet dog Honeybear that we lost recently to a crazy driver. Jesus, it’s either tears of laughter, sorrow, or empathy around here. I need to carry a handkerchief.
December 1, 2011 at 2:47 pm
My mom died November 8. She was a cranky ol’ bitch, but she had the most generous heart of anyone I’ve ever known. Donating in her memory; she would definitely be proud to be a part of this project.
Rock on, you fat jealous losers!
December 1, 2011 at 6:12 pm
I’m sure she would definitely be be proud of YOU as well
December 1, 2011 at 2:49 pm
You assholes have me crying as much read the comments as I did reading the post.
Donated!
December 1, 2011 at 2:49 pm
I sent in $20, hopefully to help with the wagon. And if you already have that covered, use my money for an aluminum baseball bat to use on those “big kids” from up the street if they decide to trash this one. Aluminum makes a much sweeter sound against a troglodyte skull than ash wood.
December 1, 2011 at 2:50 pm
This year we spent 1/3 of our usual amount on gifts for the kids, and cut out gifts to siblings entirely. All of the “extra” money is going to kids who need a Christmas. Fuck paying off the credit cards.
December 1, 2011 at 4:55 pm
The world’s ending in 2012 anyway. Run up those credit cards!
December 1, 2011 at 2:51 pm
Done and done!
I hope every kid on that list gets a little something to make their holiday merry!
I shared this post on Facebook too, and if you haven’t already, please do! The more people that see it, the more money raised for these kids!
December 1, 2011 at 2:52 pm
Donation sent all they way from Scotland
. Hope all of these kids get to have a great Christmas.
December 1, 2011 at 2:53 pm
Done!
December 1, 2011 at 3:34 pm
That little boy on the left in the first photo is looking right into my heart. I want to hug him. I hope we can do something good for that family this Christmas.
December 1, 2011 at 6:21 pm
He looks like me when I was a little … Big brown eyes…I teared up when
I saw that innocence…the innocence that we all had when we were little. Bless him and all those little stinkers!
December 1, 2011 at 2:54 pm
Was almost done Xmas shopping, but this is the one thing i hadn’t done yet. I hope these kids can enjoy a Christmas without worries and pain. Everyone deserves at least one.
December 1, 2011 at 2:55 pm
After reading through the comments, I’m glad April is managing this. I have a feeling if it was left up to us, one house would end up getting about 250 padlock-protected little red wagons without some HK oversight. Bless. I love Regretsy.
December 1, 2011 at 2:55 pm
It felt good to donate everything in my paypal account to this cause. It wasn’t enough to change my life (year of suck) but it was enough to change a kid’s Christmas.
December 1, 2011 at 3:16 pm
It felt horrible to donate everything in my Paypal account to this cause. Because $3.51 is pathetic. I wish I could give more.
December 1, 2011 at 2:57 pm
I can’t afford to give my friends or family members gifts this year, but I can spare a few bucks to help these kids. They need some happiness far more than anyone in my family needs more video games.
December 1, 2011 at 3:03 pm
I’m glad that the work holiday gift exchange is a food shelf donation this year. The BF is only getting gifts made out of craft supplies already in the stash, so I could spare a little for this. Now that we live together and he’s chipping in on the rent, I should be able to donate more next week. Posted on FB, too. De-lurked after years to say way to be a bunch of awesome fat losers.
December 1, 2011 at 3:05 pm
Y’all make me laugh–meanspiritedly, but laugh–every day. I hope my donation help give these kiddos some happy giggles for Christmas.
December 1, 2011 at 3:10 pm
I threw my back out and got painkillers and time off from work at JUST the right moment! Now, if the other 106,314 of you are also Extra Medicated, and everyone burns a $20.00 hole in their Discover card…it’ll be Solid Carbon Fiber Radio Flyers all around!
December 1, 2011 at 3:17 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
December 1, 2011 at 3:42 pm
I hereby give you permission to feel like a bit of a ninny until you drag yourself to your computer, sobbing like a pig in a war, and donate your pennies to this cause… because right now karma is delightedly smashing up your dreams of ever getting that car. Good karma.
December 1, 2011 at 3:56 pm
*taps Karma on the shoulder and points up there*
December 1, 2011 at 3:14 pm
OK,the fat jealous loser cheapskate who donated $3.51 is me. Because that’s all I had. I hope the 6-8 business days (say 9) it’ll take for the money to show up ’cause I don’t have a credit card is OK.
December 1, 2011 at 3:14 pm
I’m blessed this year to be able to send my brat, er, teenager on a European tour with school. I have not been to freaking Nice, Barcelona or Rome, btw, so there’s that. Anyway, it will count as her gift for xmas, birthday, hanukkah, kwanza, valentines…you get the idea. It pains me to greatly to read about kids who might not even get the little things they want, so you have my $50, I wish I could do more but that kid is costing me a fortune.
December 1, 2011 at 3:15 pm
Pimping this like whoa.
December 1, 2011 at 3:15 pm
Donated, facebook linked calling out all my fat jealous loser friends… good luck with this project, it is a noble one! I love you, Regretsy! Including all you fans.
December 1, 2011 at 3:16 pm
We don’t have a ton of cash sitting around here either. However, we can both go without a few bottles of wine, or a new bauble so some kid can get Christmas.
December 1, 2011 at 3:17 pm
I was only able to donate a bit right now, and I feel awful about the lame amount. Hopefully I’ll get paid before it’s too late and throw some more in the pot.
December 1, 2011 at 3:20 pm
I’m so thankful for my healthy kids, I donated $20 from each of them.
December 1, 2011 at 3:22 pm
I remember some rough Christmases as a kid. Maybe my little pittance will make someone a little happier.
I was fortunate enough to sell some t-shirts last week, so Merry Christmas you glorious Regretsy miscreants!
December 1, 2011 at 3:24 pm
Donated $40 despite being unemployed for 2 years. Best thing I spend money on all month.
Thank you April!
December 1, 2011 at 3:26 pm
Not got a lot of money this Xmas but I couldn’t resist this. I hope $5, though modest, will help put a huge smile on a kid’s face this year.
GOD ARENT WE ALL JUST A BUNCH OF FAT USELESS LOSERS
December 1, 2011 at 3:28 pm
I am… In awe. Both about the stories, but also that you give so much yourself Helen. Youre a christmas angel indeed!
We dont have much ourselfes, but compared to these kids, we have it all. Donated 20, so thats one child at least
I will share this among my friends, in hopes that they will donate as well.
And to all of you who already donated; Bless you! Im not even christian, but bless you!
December 1, 2011 at 3:32 pm
Year-long lurker and lover of the fuckery decloaks to join and donate $50 for a great cause! Thanks for making me cry.
December 1, 2011 at 3:33 pm
I cried like a baby reading this. I was going to blame it on my wacked-out hormones, but after reading the comments I find I’m in excellent company. Made a donation. Just wish I could give more.
December 1, 2011 at 3:35 pm
Tossed my cash in the hat… will clear from the great white north in a few days.
If there is anything that needs doing in South-Central Ontario or even the Buffalo or Niagara Falls, NY area, let me know. I’d be happy to pick-up, drop-off, shop, wrap, bulk mail, etc. I don’t have family, so it would help me feel festive too. Win-win.
December 1, 2011 at 4:08 pm
Yeah, I’m unemployed, I have nothing to do, so likewise if anything is needed in the East Bay/Alameda, CA area. I can make deliveries, wrap shit…
December 1, 2011 at 3:37 pm
Also, would like to personally smash the bigger kids’ toys who wrecked the wagon. Mean people suck.
December 1, 2011 at 3:39 pm
I have to wait until tonight (boyflame owes me some money and is paying me back before midnight or I play ‘Easy Lover’ – Phil Collins on repeat) but I’ll add some cashy money to the cause.
December 1, 2011 at 3:40 pm
Donated. Guys, I’ve been in a month long down spell but this just made me feel human again. Thank you Regretsy, and kids, have a great Christmas.
December 1, 2011 at 3:41 pm
April you have touched my heart – YOU BITCH!!! This better not be some scam to keep you in malt liquor & percocet; good luck and I hope you exceed the target you have set.
December 1, 2011 at 3:44 pm
The gifts for my son underneath the Chanukkah Bush will be a few short this year but I hope that his loss will be other kids gain. God bless you April Winchell
December 1, 2011 at 3:47 pm
I don’t read Regretsy as much as I used to, but this post caught my eye on FB and I’m glad it did. I was feeling sad about my mom earlier today (this is our first holiday season without her around), but she was always doing things like this for other people, and I try my best to do the same. Thanks.
December 1, 2011 at 7:35 pm
Sorry for your loss. I’m sure she would be proud.
December 1, 2011 at 3:48 pm
Did what I could, sorry it’s not much
December 1, 2011 at 3:49 pm
I donated what was left in my paypal account. It wasn’t much but every donation helps.
December 1, 2011 at 3:49 pm
I was a fountain of tears for like a WEEK reading all the e-mails that came through my in-box. But I am HAPPY to report that we have a LOT of kids who are going to get to open a present on Christmas thanks to you guys. You all are THE BEST PEOPLE EVER!
December 1, 2011 at 4:32 pm
Thank you so much for all that you’ve done to make this happen, Grimm. You have my love (whether you want it or not).
December 1, 2011 at 5:25 pm
Just curious — if we go way over the 4K mark (which I suspect will happen before tomorrow morning at this rate), do you have more possible kids lined up? Or is the plan to spend a little bit more on the ones you’ve already lined up?
December 1, 2011 at 3:49 pm
Like everybody else, I am unemployed, in serious debt, and have my own Christmas challenges. But fuck it, my kid is still having a good Christmas,so I donated, too. I wish I could afford more. Kids should have magical fairyland Christmases before they get all cynical and ruined by life. I hope my meager bit helps.
December 1, 2011 at 3:51 pm
I happily made my contribution. Thank you a million times over for setting this up and allowing us to participate. I wouldn’t want to be a fat, jealous loser with anyone but you guys.
December 1, 2011 at 3:51 pm
After crying my way through the post, and then crying even MORE through the comments, how in the world can I NOT donate something?! I’m currently unemployed, for at least the next month, probably more like the next three months, taking classes towards a new career, selling off stuff, dealing with my dad dying this summer and my mom on hospice in assisted living, and I’m the only kid, and handknitting most of my holiday gifts – but there is money in my account for these kids. As an adult, I love Christmas for the lights and the music and family – as a kid, it was the magic of gifts from people who loved me. So, yeah, this fat jealous loser can totally afford to send something from the heart for kids who *really* need it.
Thanks, Regretsy, for giving my life some meaning as well as providing much-needed humor. *sniff* I love you, man!
December 1, 2011 at 3:52 pm
Every one of those kids is beautiful! Grimm, pack a bunch of hugs from us into every box, OK???
December 1, 2011 at 3:54 pm
Longtime reader, first time commenter. This call to action had me logging on to PayPal as fast as … well, way faster than I usually do anything.
Normally, I’m not much of a giver. There was a homeless guy who used to work one of the underpasses on my way to work who moved me to hand him a $20 once a year at Christmas time. Mostly because he always had a smile on his face and never made a big deal about the fact that the rest of the time I turned up my radio and didn’t make eye contact so that I could pretend that he wasn’t walking up and down between the cars parked at the stoplight.
We’ve moved offices now, so donating to this is the least that I can do.
December 1, 2011 at 3:56 pm
I’m glad to help. Christmas should be only for children anyway. If I needed another set of space bags I’d hurl myself off a cliff first.
December 1, 2011 at 4:00 pm
At first I was all, “I’d love to, but I can’t afford to help,” and then I remembered I go to Starbucks almost every Friday with friends. If I give up my latte and quiche for two weeks, I can give a kid a happier holiday AND give myself a nicer waistline. Bring it on!
Now I just have to stop crying. Seriously, thanks for reminding me that there are awesome, caring people in the world!
December 1, 2011 at 4:04 pm
I love to lurk here, never posting, but this appeal hit me. Here’s a modest donation. Can’t wait to see the genuine good we’re doing (in addition to laughing ourselves sick with the Advent Calendar . . .)
December 1, 2011 at 4:08 pm
This post makes me grateful on several levels. First, that I have a job and can afford to donate; second, as much as we Canadians bitch and complain about health care here at least life saving medical care doesn’t make us fuckin’ BANKRUPT; and third, I like believing that there won’t be a shameless skimming for ‘administration’ fees.
December 1, 2011 at 4:10 pm
I’d rather give to these kids than the random toy donations in our area. I know they will be well supplied, so I hope my donation will bring some cheer. You really made me tear up.
December 1, 2011 at 4:12 pm
Done. Since it’s set up through PayPal I just pulled from my balance. Bless each and every one of you fat, jealous losers.
December 1, 2011 at 4:14 pm
God I wish I could do this. I lost my job myself two weeks ago, and I’m desperately craftarding myself silly trying to raise money to pay the bills. Thank goodness for us, we had already finished Christmas shopping for my sons back in October.
If there is anything non-monetary I can do to help, April, PLEASE let me know.
December 1, 2011 at 4:15 pm
Alright, I gave my Tim Horton’s money for the next little bit. The cute kids in the doggie costume picture need something cool more than I need my Tim Horton’s coffee.
December 1, 2011 at 4:16 pm
All, I have a sale section in my shop from which I’ll donate all proceeds to the Secret Santa fund. You can find it at http://www.etsy.com/shop/ouidastrunk?section_id=10753028
December 1, 2011 at 4:21 pm
I love you fucking assholes.
December 1, 2011 at 4:23 pm
So happy to donate to these marvelous children. Hoping I get good news on my job search tomorrow so that I can increase my contribution!
December 1, 2011 at 4:33 pm
This group of sarcastic, cynical smart-asses makes me laugh every day, and for that I am glad to chip in. Helping some great kids have a happier Christmas is a bonus.
December 1, 2011 at 4:33 pm
Abso-fucking-lutely! This is what it’s all about. Count me in.
December 1, 2011 at 4:35 pm
I’m going to the memorial for one of my best friend’s mother tomorrow. If she saw this site, she would have pretended to be appalled…and then laugh…and then donate. I put a couple ducats in the pot in your honor, Joanie!
December 1, 2011 at 4:35 pm
I really wish I could afford to donate more money but I guess every bit helps. I remember what it was like as a kid to get close to nothing for Christmas some years and seeing it make my mom so sad to not be able to give me more.
It’s so amazing that all the hateful pieces of shit here who have nothing better to do than make other people miserable, are able to rally and give some kids a great holiday!
December 1, 2011 at 4:37 pm
well, now you’ve done it. just when i think you cannot bring more snarky joy to the curious self righteous, the regretsy team pulls a wonder stunt like this. genius. makes me shappy (that would be sad+happy) to read these stories, but good karma to you all for giving during this holiday season. thank you.
December 1, 2011 at 4:39 pm
I had to turn to Toys for Tots this year so that my son would have a Christmas, but even I can afford $5 for someone less fortunate then me. If this fat, jealous loser can pitch in, anyone can.
December 1, 2011 at 4:40 pm
Things are tight here, but thankfully not that bad. I have made a small donation (all i can afford at the mo) but I hate the thought of kids going without. I hope you make well more than your target and can help loads more kids
December 1, 2011 at 4:44 pm
Hey! I’m owed five bucks for writing a promotional limerick! I’ll point ‘em in this direction, and then it’s like I made that $5 happen in my artistic ability!
December 1, 2011 at 4:45 pm
god damn it. I JUST told myself I couldn’t spend any more money. But this doesn’t count.
donated
come on guys we can do better than $4000
December 1, 2011 at 4:49 pm
The very least I could do.. maybe with some more work I can give a little more. =) <3
December 1, 2011 at 4:55 pm
Been silently stalking this site for about 18 months and never posted until now. I’m a prosecuting attorney in a semi-metropolitan area (Indiana’s semi-metropolitan, right?) and lately I’ve been wondering if there are any human beings worth a cr*p out there. But this, this is a genuine example of humanity at its finest. I was lucky enough to always have nice Christmases as a kid, so I’m honored to be able to give the same to someone else.
December 1, 2011 at 4:58 pm
What, we’re saying all little brats can experience the joy of Christmas morning like my precious babies do?
Fine. You’ll get my cash, Regretsy, but I won’t like giving it. Because I am a bitter, fat, IlovetheselittlekidsandIhopetheylovetheirshinynewwagonthankyouRegretsySantasfaithinhumanityhasbeenrestoredsniff.
December 1, 2011 at 4:58 pm
Those stories had me in tears. Every child should be able to wake up on Christmas and see something under the tree. I want to find all these kids and just give them the biggest hugs. They truly deserve it.
I would also like to find those kids who broke that wagon and stick a fake spider or something in their beds.
December 1, 2011 at 5:02 pm
Love you, April and the rest of you jealous fat losers.
May these kids have a wonderful Christmas! <3
December 1, 2011 at 5:04 pm
I think this is amazing! For all those with cryabeetus that think Regretsians are hreatless, this is proof of how very wrong they are! I sell on etsy and would love to help, 10% of all sales made while this is running will be donated, plus what ever I can spare from my next paycheck! There is nothing as heartwarming as the face of a happy child on Christmas. I love my fuckery as much as the next person, but a child on Christmas morning is nothing to mess with! I can’t wait to see what we can do!
http://www.pysankypanky.etsy.com
December 2, 2011 at 4:33 am
Your eggs are so beautiful! I can’t imagine the patience you must have to paint them like that. I wish I could afford one… or two, or 50!
December 1, 2011 at 5:05 pm
One year while I was separated from my ex, unemployed and living with my parents I had maybe five bucks to spend on my daughter for xmas. If it hadn’t been for my mom I would have had nothing.
I always try to do something now for Xmas through work, this year they scaled the family adoption thing way down and I gave some but felt like I was waiting for something extra special to come along. This was it.
$50 in the pot.
Bless you April, and bless everyone here.
For those of you who don’t have money to contribute, I suggest forwarding the link to people or putting it on facebook.
December 1, 2011 at 5:09 pm
I just scared the crap out of my boyfriend, with my sudden tears. Then, he read the post too, and started tearing up. Pay day is coming up before the week is over, and these kiddos will be getting a good portion of it. I’m a poor college kid myself, but I’ve already had great Christmases growing up; now it’s time to pay it forward, as has already been said.
December 1, 2011 at 5:17 pm
Now I’m crying….funded in what, two hours?
December 1, 2011 at 5:17 pm
Aw, We did it! Looky!
December 1, 2011 at 5:18 pm
Is it no longer possible to donate now that the goal has been reached? I’ve already put in my 20 bucks, but I’m just curious.
December 1, 2011 at 5:20 pm
$20 donated. As a 20 year old college student I really hope this helped. It was the Rory story that got me, I also had to have a kidney transplant last year after being on dialysis so I understand all the hospital visits that little boy is going through and the cost of it all. I hope he is doing well and that I could do more to help him out.
December 1, 2011 at 5:21 pm
Done. Thank you for the opportunity to pitch in for these kids. I am ardently wishing for each of them to get at least one thing that thrills them. They deserve it.
*sends a few extra namesake-hugs to Rory*
December 1, 2011 at 5:21 pm
With the extra money can we give the parents money to buy wrapping paper and bows, boxes, tape, etc? Or ornaments? When you have nothing every dollar counts.
December 1, 2011 at 5:23 pm
That is what I want to know, can we still donate?
December 1, 2011 at 5:25 pm
Look at us assholes. It’s not enough for us to give 200 kids a good Christmas, now we want more.
December 1, 2011 at 5:27 pm
Hell yeah, I want to do more. Maybe we can shoot for 300! Please? With craft herpes on top?
December 1, 2011 at 5:32 pm
I’m guessing more kids means more work, and maybe it would become too big of a task. But if it would be any advantage to have a person on the ground in Australia, I’d be happy to help.
December 1, 2011 at 5:23 pm
I would be more than happy to donate, if the donation function opens up again. Even though the goal has been reached, I would still like to help, if possible.
December 1, 2011 at 5:24 pm
Damn! I was on my fucking ipad…so new to it…and I wanted to give…in the time it took me to get up off my fat ass and make it to my desk, it says FUNDED! How do I do that now when it’s funded…can I just send something to Radio savant thingy on my paypal??
December 1, 2011 at 5:30 pm
I will not be STOPPED! I sent it to you on the email used for the kickstarter payment…xoxo
December 1, 2011 at 5:32 pm
Oh, and Merry Hanukkah too!
December 1, 2011 at 5:24 pm
Are there more kids to add to the list?
December 1, 2011 at 5:25 pm
I just donated $20 and then it goes FUNDED. Boom. Maybe I’m the last? Fuck yeah.
Dude, I say if anyone wants to keep donating, reopen the fund. Help more kids, help the parents, help the 200 kids with more… something. Keep it open as long as these heartless bastards want to donate.
December 1, 2011 at 5:28 pm
I’m still willing to throw in a few more bucks if there’s someplace for it to go.
Maybe some prepaid gift cards could get slipped in for the parents of these kids? Sounds like they’ve got it rough too.
December 1, 2011 at 5:39 pm
That sounds like a good idea, I still want to chip in if you’ll take my money (please take my money!). Fat Jealous Losers, you continue to amaze me.
December 1, 2011 at 5:28 pm
Done! Made my donation, went back to the page and aw you are funded! I think you are gonna go WELL over $4000. Will you add more kids or maybe up the $$$ amount per gift? No matter – I know whatever you do, it will be great. Thanks HK – you’re a pal to all!
December 1, 2011 at 5:34 pm
I can’t really afford it, but I didn’t spend too much time thinking about it. I see these kids and can’t help but think about my two little girls… Especially the wagon story, even though we don’t have a wagon.
It’s not much, but as I won’t donate to the Salvation Army (but my kids will donate my money to them [I try to at least have some quarters for them to throw in the bucket]… so I’m not that bad)I had to throw in my
I thought about it too much with the kickstarter, This time I donated before I could talk myself out of it.
December 1, 2011 at 5:40 pm
Damnit, you guys made me cry.
December 1, 2011 at 5:43 pm
Long time lurker, first time poster.
I’ve only just seen this as I’m in Australia.
What a wonderful thing and I am disappointed that it’s fully subscribed and cannot donate.
Thanks for doing this & I wish I was there to see those beautiful kids open up that red wagon on Christmas Day.
December 1, 2011 at 6:49 pm
Psh, no excuse! I’m also from Australia, and I woke up hours ago
…Unless you’re from Perth, then you’re excused.
December 1, 2011 at 5:51 pm
Already closed? You fat jealous loser bastards! There’s got to be more needy kids we could help.
My 3 y.o. LOVES her red wagon. I hope the big bitch of karma gets those nasty older kids ASAP. (Cheers to my Christmas spirit!)
December 1, 2011 at 5:54 pm
I get paid next Wednesday. Can I still donate then?
December 1, 2011 at 6:19 pm
Damn you for making me cry!
December 1, 2011 at 6:20 pm
Lady Gaga’s tweets about the MTN video buried this in my twitter feed! Will there be another opportunity to donate?
December 1, 2011 at 7:22 pm
I was on the way to school tonight and on the radio there was an advertisement about collecting toys for families with hospitalized children. The drive was so the children could have something for the holidays and the parents wouldn’t have worry about either the price of buying or the act of going out and getting it. And I just started crying. The thought of having to be by your child’s side at a hospital seemed so weary.
of all the problems we have (cars, school, bills, unemployment) we have healthy children. And its so much harder to fix health than any thing else.
December 1, 2011 at 7:55 pm
I have 17 cents in my bank account but, I’m in LA and I can gift-wrap like no O’neal business!!! Or shop. Or hold stuff. I have nice handwriting. I can get coffee. I’ll do anything! I want to help, goddamnit!!!
December 1, 2011 at 10:38 pm
Crap y’all… is there any way to start a new fund? I just saw this and would love to donate but apparently once it’s funded, that’s it?
December 2, 2011 at 1:56 am
Please, start another fund … my PayPal account is ready to go ka-ching!
December 2, 2011 at 6:07 am
Christ almighty, what a way to go, you fat jealous losers, you!
When I switched off the computer to go to bed last night, this didn’t even exist. Now I’ve come home from a doctor’s appointment (but that’s another story), switched this on, and it’s already fully funded! Wow!
GIVE YOURSELVES A GREAT BIG HUG.
December 2, 2011 at 6:41 am
Is this thread closed as far as donations. Surely there is at least one more kid who could benefit. My clicking finger is hovering over the paypal “donate” button!
December 2, 2011 at 1:41 pm
For anyone finding that crying over wagons makes them want to throw money at children, I’ve started a thread in the forum where the fat jealous losers who didn’t get to donate to this drive can list other worthy causes: http://forums.regretsy.com/topic.php?id=13802
Ride the generosity wave on over there and give a few bucks if you can. Or help other people find a good place to throw that money, because otherwise it’s just gonna get all tear-stained instead of helping kids or puppies or whatever.
December 3, 2011 at 8:38 am
It’s official: April and the Regretsy community are my favorite people of the year!
Love,
Erika
December 3, 2011 at 10:42 am
Curses being too late to donate to this cause! Instead, I’m going to take my worthless ass over to the closest Barnes & Noble to pick out a few books to donate to needy local kids and drop a check off at the food pantry that has helped me out this year (hooray for finally getting a roommate and being able to pick up extra hours at work!).
December 3, 2011 at 4:16 pm
Shit, I came in way too late on this! That’ll teach me to stay off-line for two days. I would be delighted to contribute to a new fund if you decide to start one.
December 3, 2011 at 11:54 pm
So, I realize that the donating part of this is done (and yes, I’m gonna get a letter or two from Santa)…but…it wasn’t until the 1st that I was in a position to be donating. (Fighting for money with the VA for *months*…no amount of alcohol has made that fun so far.)
Which is a roundabout way of saying that I hope you run this again next year. Unless there are more gifts that can be sent to children in need, in which case I’ll donate…and *still* hope you run this again next year.
December 5, 2011 at 7:43 am
Man, I wish I knew about this sooner! My nephew lost this handmade doll I made him and everytime I come home he asks me where “henry jr” is. His and his brother’s mom passed away last year and I know they’re going through hard times, even though they’re so young. Is the date past for donating also? I read the recent post so I guess it is?