Crappuccino
This post first appeared on Regretsy on November 30, 2009
Boy oh boy, I just really like Starbucks, don’t you? I mean, I like it a lot! I can drink 12 of these bottles of Frappuccino in one sitting in fact I just did hey what about a wreath wouldn’t that be a good idea I have to do something with all of these caps I SAID WHAT ABOUT A WREATH HEY WHY AREN’T YOU LISTENING TO ME WOW IS IT HOT IN HERE IT SEEMS LIKE IT’S REALLY HOT IN HERE OHMYGODIFORGOTTOFEEDTHECATWHATNOTHINGI’MJUSTDUSTING
THEINSIDEOFTHEDISHWASHERLALALLALLALA
November 13, 2011 at 11:23 am
You just reminded me of Kirsten Wiig’s character on SNL. “What? Just kidding, I am a total moron, no I’m not, yes I am, maybe I am, maybe you are, maybe we both are no just kidding just you are.”
November 13, 2011 at 11:24 am
I’m going to assume the seller does most of her crafting on the john.
November 13, 2011 at 11:25 am
It does sort of look like it’s on the toilet seat … and it’s suspiciously yellow in the upper left hand side.
November 14, 2011 at 6:54 am
the yellow is also in other areas – looks like this was poorly photoshopped “auto enchance” That or yeah… toilet seat… *pukes*
November 13, 2011 at 11:25 am
Shit, the colors of the thread dont even match the caps………….
November 13, 2011 at 11:26 am
Of all the things in the world to weave into a wreath.
November 13, 2011 at 11:56 am
It’s actually crocheted. That makes me think this is the same sort of person who would crochet a toilet paper cover.
November 13, 2011 at 3:02 pm
The wreath is crocheted. The description says the caps have been woven into the wreath.
November 13, 2011 at 6:30 pm
We’ve already established that the crafter is a bit nutso. It’s not my fault that she/he has no idea that they’re crocheting. /end comically indignant tone
December 4, 2011 at 4:07 pm
I was thinking they should have used some Club Fuckery pinbacks instead of bottle caps.
November 13, 2011 at 11:26 am
A silly item, no doubt, but it’s HK’s caption that brings me to tears (of laughter).
November 13, 2011 at 11:27 am
Dear dog, WHY???
Also, it’s not there anymore. Phyllis the tit-pincher told me so.
November 13, 2011 at 11:35 am
Ah, but you can still get things like THIS:
Recycled Flower Headband Upcycled Starbucks Can Fun Teenage Gift
November 13, 2011 at 11:38 am
Or this:
Starbucks Coffee Recycled Can Ring
This is part of a metal can, mind you. The seller states there are no sharp edges, but what about that point at the bottom that’s anxiously waiting to plunge itself into the top of your hand?
November 13, 2011 at 12:02 pm
Nice cans.
November 13, 2011 at 12:28 pm
or remember this?
http://www.regretsy.com/?s=coffe+cup+hair
November 13, 2011 at 1:20 pm
AAAAAAAAAAAUGH I HAD ONLY JUST FORGOTTEN
November 13, 2011 at 1:09 pm
Not to be worn while serving the “gentleman’s latte”.
November 13, 2011 at 11:38 am
That model… is that Rebecca Black?!?!
November 13, 2011 at 11:52 am
When I first saw this I kinda wanted it then my Starbucks-frappacino-caffeine-rush wore off & now I just want to give it to someone as a politeness test. “Oh…gee…thanks…you shouldn’t have…”
November 13, 2011 at 11:58 am
Garbage for the hair – how fascinating.
November 13, 2011 at 4:40 pm
Hence the name “fascinator.”
November 13, 2011 at 1:08 pm
I like this. I’d want it on a wider headband though. Those little ones are too weak to stand up to my mane.
November 13, 2011 at 11:32 am
Grandma has a lot of time on her hands, and lives in a building with a Starbucks on the ground floor.
November 13, 2011 at 11:32 am
This truly looks like something that some sweet, grandmotherly old bat would get the ill-conceived idea for, and just keep going with it until it was done, wrapped up, and under the Christmastree with some unfortunate offspring or descendant’s name on it. If they had used, oh, say, a charm inset instead of bottle caps, it might be charming. Silicone discs? Hotplate, bitches! But the bottlecaps? No, granny… just… no.
November 13, 2011 at 11:41 am
This, on second thought, is the perfect place to set your Hardee’s coffee mug while eating your breakfast off you Waffle House collectible plates, and perhaps sipping egg nog from your collectible Arby’s glass holiday cups.
November 13, 2011 at 3:39 pm
Can I use my Collectible Images Dale Earnhardt “Race in Peace” cups instead?
November 14, 2011 at 11:34 am
I’d be amazed if you didn’t. ; )
November 13, 2011 at 11:45 am
This is the result of some mad drinking game…
November 13, 2011 at 11:48 am
I’m confident I could fit my head through that hole and wear it as a scarf/choker/neck garment thingy.
November 13, 2011 at 11:59 am
Attach it to a hoody and it would be a snood!
November 13, 2011 at 11:49 am
To be fair, it’s not a bad price for the amount of work and materials etc etc… But what is it FOR?!
November 13, 2011 at 12:02 pm
This reminds me of when one of my friends worked at Starbucks and got me a bunch of Christmas gifts from Starbucks but NO COFFEE. What is the point of a Starbucks brand product that is not coffee?
November 13, 2011 at 3:38 pm
Maybe your friend doesn’t want you to drink awful coffee?
November 13, 2011 at 12:09 pm
First, why blue and white? Not only does it not match the tops but it is more Chanukah than Christmas as seller suggests.
Second, is it the picture, just me, or does the yarn look as thought it has been subject to some frappuccino spills?
November 13, 2011 at 12:30 pm
it’s just you.
November 13, 2011 at 3:04 pm
There are definitely some spots. I’m hoping it’s the lighting.
November 13, 2011 at 12:19 pm
I think that April needs to lay off the caffeine… I can just see her, head and shoulders inside her dishwasher with a can of lemon pledge and a microfiber dust cloth.
AFTER she’s done mailing out the kickstarter premiums…
November 13, 2011 at 3:15 pm
That’s not a result of the caffeine. That’s entirely from the speed
November 13, 2011 at 12:26 pm
Of course I’m trying to read this while I’m at Caribou Coffee.
Moo. (Or whatever caribou say.)
November 13, 2011 at 12:36 pm
As I read this, I have a pot of Green Mountain coffee on the brew.
And a lasagna about to go into the oven.
November 13, 2011 at 12:43 pm
6 caps, you could use it as a tastefull menora like this one
You could wear it around your junk with a birthday candle in your pee hole.
November 13, 2011 at 1:25 pm
Wow, that *is* one tasteful menorah, all right! The only way to make it more tasteful is to have all the doggies playing poker.
And now I know what I’m making my niece for Hanukkah!
November 13, 2011 at 2:02 pm
This would almost certainly win a blue ribbon at my county fair.
And I am not even kidding.
At all.
November 13, 2011 at 3:36 pm
Are those nut cups?
November 13, 2011 at 6:36 pm
Yes. There is a catagory for decorated nut cups. And yes, there was more than one entry.
And THIS was the 1st place entry.
I have big plans to enter some spectacular fuckery next year….
November 13, 2011 at 2:27 pm
It reminds me of those crochet hats people used to make out of beer cans in the 70s.
November 13, 2011 at 2:32 pm
You mean something like this?
http://www.etsy.com/listing/71131273/crochet-pabst-beer-can-hat?ref=sr_list_3&ga_search_submit=Search&ga_search_query=beer++can+hat&ga_view_type=list&ga_ship_to=US&ga_search_type=handmade&ga_facet=handmade
Oh, look, it’s PBR, especially for hipsters!
November 13, 2011 at 2:36 pm
This is totally something my great-grandma would have made. She recycled all sorts of weird things like tab can tops and gum wrappers and anything else into wreaths. One of her specialties was wreaths made out of dismembered Barbie doll arms and legs. And it’s an absolute tragedy that not only did none of those leg wreaths survive in my family, but I don’t even have a picture of those fuckeries.
November 13, 2011 at 3:13 pm
I would be tempted to buy that.
November 13, 2011 at 3:36 pm
If you play that John Lennon song backwards, you can hear him say, “Look at all the people, wearing things made of Starbucks.”
Creepy.
Course he might have been talking about that tv show character…
November 13, 2011 at 3:41 pm
The little bow makes me think garter for some reason. If one’s leg were skinny enough, or if the yarn were stretchy enough, it could make a fine garter. Something old (the bottle caps), something new (the yarn, hopefully), have a friend buy it and borrow it from them and you have something borrowed, and of course the yarn is something blue. Can you imagine your partner removing that garter with his/her teeth? Sexy.
November 14, 2011 at 3:50 am
The chewed-on ribbon is a nice touch.
November 14, 2011 at 4:22 am
The person who attempted to post this comment is a spammer, inviting you to buy shitty Ed Hardy knockoffs.
I invite you to sign them up to Michelle Bachman newsletters.
zhang8074@hotmail.com
If you have a blog, here is the IP address so you may block them:
125.78.235.123
November 14, 2011 at 4:42 pm
My thumb-upping is for the edited version.
November 19, 2011 at 10:44 am
I know someone who would love to have that. I confess. They would be so tickled.. I almost want to buy it for them.