LET’S MAKE SOME MONEY
This post first appeared on Regretsy on November 22, 2010
OBAMA SOUVENIR TRAVEL CUP PEPPER GRINDER MEASURING CUP CENTERPIECE VINTAGE ECO FRIENDLY DESK ORGANIZER (PENS NOT INCLUDED)
GREEN EARTH FRIENDLY SUSTAINABLE POTATO KNIFE BLOCK EXECUTIVE DESK TOY JEWELRY HOLDER IRISH (KNIVES NOT INCLUDED) CAN BE MADE WITH ORANGES
REPURPOSED ECO-CONSCIOUS POST APOCALYPTIC STEAMPUNK ZIPLOC DISPENSER FONDUE SET
CUSTOM SHABBY CHIC UPCYCLED KAWAII FRENCH COUNTRY CHIHUAHUA DISPLAY STAND
UPDATE - Regretsian “Ratfishes” left the following fantastic effort in the thread for this post, earning the coveted Regretsy Comment of the Day.
October 23, 2011 at 9:32 am
Wait, what? Stacking shit together, and not even gluing it? This is a thing, that people have the temerity to attempt to get paid for?
Sign me the fuck up. I put a roll of paper towels on top of my countertop water filter this morning. I must have been possessed by the whimscle gestalt of fuckery!
October 23, 2011 at 6:42 pm
If you think that’s creative, you should see my desk.
October 23, 2011 at 9:13 pm
Ii love the “repurposed rat”! I have a lazy ass cat I need to “repurpose”, any suggestions?
October 23, 2011 at 9:39 am
From Trash to Tr…
…ash
October 23, 2011 at 9:13 pm
in the trailer park that would be the prized possesion!
October 23, 2011 at 9:43 am
“GREEN EARTH FRIENDLY SUSTAINABLE POTATO KNIFE BLOCK EXECUTIVE DESK TOY JEWELRY HOLDER IRISH (KNIVES NOT INCLUDED) CAN BE MADE WITH ORANGES” Should be Celtic, not Irish. Celtic is much fancier than Irish. If you have a tangled bit of string you could even make it a Celtic Knot. Or Celtic Not. I always forget how to spell that word.
October 23, 2011 at 10:18 am
It’s the potato that makes it distinctly Irish. To make it Celtic you’d want to stick the knives in Larry Bird or Paul Pierce etc.
October 23, 2011 at 9:46 am
I don’t think that little dog likes being on display.
He looks sad.
October 23, 2011 at 9:55 am
Who knew?? I have a gold mine in my kitchen sink right now.
October 23, 2011 at 9:56 am
I want the cake plate at top so I can reverse engineer the item to discover how to phase solid matter.
October 23, 2011 at 9:58 am
Make up stand? Do we have a special stand for our make up?
October 23, 2011 at 11:37 am
Well, not yet. . .
October 23, 2011 at 5:57 pm
No, it’s completely made up.
October 23, 2011 at 7:36 pm
Mine prefer to recline.
October 23, 2011 at 9:14 pm
a STAND for make-up! well holy-shit ain’t that fancy…usually I just keep it in an old tampax box.
October 23, 2011 at 9:58 am
Whenever I see posts like this from you, where you recreate Etsy tomfoolery in your house, I really wish I could be there to see the staging. I always wonder if Bronc eggs you on, or if he stands in the background with a can of soda and shakes his head.
October 23, 2011 at 4:28 pm
He stands in the background with a long island iced tea and eggs her on while shaking his head.
October 23, 2011 at 10:07 am
So many choices…
Do I want to sing these to “Tom’s Diner” or “We Didn’t Start the Fire”?
October 23, 2011 at 9:16 pm
how about we didn’t start the fire to the beat of tom’s diner?
October 23, 2011 at 10:08 am
I made an “African-Inspired Renewable Resource Open-Lattice Multi-Configuration Modular GREEN Conversation Piece Interactive Geometric Display but somebody down-cycled it.
Stupid Jenga.
October 23, 2011 at 10:17 am
These items are sponsored by
The Royal Society for Putting Things on Top of Other Things.
October 23, 2011 at 4:56 pm
Is that Python? Because it sounds like Python.
October 23, 2011 at 5:19 pm
I know Python had the Royal Society for Putting Things Into Other Things. I think it was part of the storage jars segment. Not sure about the On Top of Other Things…but it works!
October 23, 2011 at 5:37 pm
Last year alone, member of The Royal Society for Putting Things on Top of Other Things put no less than 23 things on top of other things!
October 23, 2011 at 5:40 pm
Also: for reference
October 23, 2011 at 6:58 pm
…which has an office next to the Bureau of Whimsical Fuckery
October 23, 2011 at 10:20 am
I am constantly confusing my makeup stand and my cupcake stand. At least that is what I tell people when I find icing all over my face.
October 23, 2011 at 10:43 am
…and the car mechanic says; “Looks like you blew a seal.”
Then the penquin says; “No, no – it’s ice cream!”
October 23, 2011 at 12:07 pm
This may be an old joke, but the first time I’ve heard it and I’m crying from laughing so hard. You win my internet today.
October 23, 2011 at 10:23 am
That Chihuahua looks delicious! I’m imagining it as the centerpiece of a South-of-the-Border themed wedding reception, surrounded by churros and neon tissue paper floral arrangements.
October 23, 2011 at 10:33 am
She thought she was sad then, but Tinkerbell’s life was all downhill from there after Paris Hiltons’s quinceanera. Ay, que lastima!
October 23, 2011 at 8:01 pm
Will there be hobos?
October 23, 2011 at 9:17 pm
he needs a sombrero though….
October 23, 2011 at 10:40 am
Chihuahuas don’t need air… It’s a true fax! They look better if you put chocolate curls on them.
October 23, 2011 at 11:24 am
October 23, 2011 at 11:42 am
Well, a Chihuahua is pretty good at cleaning vegetables. I usually use a potbellied pig as the bristles are a little stiffer. To get glassware really clean you really need a poodle, though.
October 23, 2011 at 11:57 am
I would NOT recommend using the actual chihuahua for cleaning the veggies. They hate being used as anything except a lap heater or, as in this case, a brush HOLDER. They can also double as burglar alarms and cat herders.
October 23, 2011 at 5:51 pm
Cat herders? Please! Cats cannot be herded, even as single units, and especially not by chihuahuas. I am reporting that false claim to the AKC.
October 23, 2011 at 7:02 pm
American Kat Club?
October 23, 2011 at 7:04 pm
Heard of cats?
Sure I’ve heard of cats
October 24, 2011 at 3:06 pm
Chihuahua as cat herder? Pshhhh, not in my house. My cats go kung fu all over my poor dog’s ass on a daily basis. I’m pretty sure the cats are calling the dog “bitch” as they claw her face off.
October 23, 2011 at 5:21 pm
Have you no spare watch parts or metal octopi? I want a steampunk vegetable brushihuahua.
October 23, 2011 at 11:47 am
I’m of the opinion that everything looks better if you put chocolate curls on them.
October 23, 2011 at 11:48 am
Helen , using a orange to store your knives will lead to premature rusting/permanent discoloration of your knives. It could also result in a neutral feedback!!
October 23, 2011 at 11:49 am
D’OH, wrong spot. I need sleep.
October 23, 2011 at 10:42 am
This genius compilation of noun and adjective bukake leaves me speechless. If only Etsians could write this well…
October 23, 2011 at 10:57 am
Someone’s been watching too much Semi-Homemade Sandra Lee.
October 23, 2011 at 11:59 am
She cracks me up… She makes these extravagant displays that takes a craft ho 10 hours to complete and makes a meal out of a box in 10 minutes. Priorities are all fucked up but she always makes a cocktail!
October 23, 2011 at 2:50 pm
The cocktail should always be your first priority.
October 23, 2011 at 5:22 pm
She rully rully likes her cocktails, but I’m not gonna hate, cos so do I. Her food is garbage though, so I can hate on that part.
October 23, 2011 at 8:35 pm
I think the only wy to be around her is WITH a cocktail or seven. Cake mixes around the world weep when she makes ‘food’.
October 23, 2011 at 11:17 am
It’s like the votive holder, the palm-themed plate and the vintage brown stemware are one. I’m in awe.
October 23, 2011 at 1:42 pm
I think the vintage stemware and the “votive holder” actually *are* one. I’ve seen these things before: you cut the top off of an ugly old goblet, then glue an ugly plate in between the two goblet pieces, and voila, you have an ugly cupcake stand. So there is actually slightly more involved then stacking. But the thing is still hideous. And putting together a cup and a plate that would cost, at most, a dollar each at the Salvation Army, and adding three minutes of work does not equal a $35 item.
October 23, 2011 at 4:33 pm
I believe that the sauce cup/votive holder was a separate piece. There appears to be a bottom to the votive.
October 23, 2011 at 11:21 am
Well, I stack shit on top of other shit all the time. I call it “clutter”. Who knew I could rename it all and sell it?! I’m gonna be rich!
October 23, 2011 at 5:07 pm
My husband leaves sculptures like that in the sink all the time! Who knew the big lug was Etsy material?
October 23, 2011 at 11:40 am
Chihuahua’s don’t seem to enjoy whimsicle fuckery as much as people do. The Chihuahua under glass seems a little sad and the vegetable cleaning Chihuahua seems downright pissed to be part of the activities.
October 23, 2011 at 12:01 pm
She thinks that anything that does not involve bacon or a ball to be stress inducing. She’s under a comforter hiding right now — sporting her halloween wear.
October 23, 2011 at 12:47 pm
bacon = good
ball = even better
comforter = best idea yet
would the Chihuahua like a hot toddy? If so, s/he can come right over!
October 23, 2011 at 11:43 am
I have an urge to stack things now.
October 23, 2011 at 9:17 pm
Urge to stack… rising!
October 23, 2011 at 11:48 am
Helen , using a orange to store your knives will lead to premature rusting/permanent discoloration of your knives. It could also result in a neutral feedback!!
October 23, 2011 at 12:24 pm
Please, no neutral feedbacks. You know how it upsets some people….
meh.October 23, 2011 at 4:03 pm
*Nuetral
October 23, 2011 at 12:03 pm
The funniest one is the last one… The basket, rodent, clock, tribal drum stand whatever the fuck it is thing. I spewed hot tea out of my nose when I saw it…
October 23, 2011 at 5:22 pm
No, really the first one was the funniest because she was fucking serious.
October 23, 2011 at 12:20 pm
I had no idea that stacking topheavy shit could be so lucrative!
(This was one of the early posts I saw reading through the archives when I arrived earlier this year…the dog almost made me wet myself.)
October 23, 2011 at 12:30 pm
HApril, is that is infamous Chihuahua you never share pics of cause it’s a meanie!?
October 23, 2011 at 5:07 pm
Yes! He’s very rude.
October 23, 2011 at 5:15 pm
BUT HE SO CUUUUUUUUUUUTE!
*dies from cuteness overload*
(I must admit your fuzzy pup is my favorite though)
October 23, 2011 at 12:58 pm
No offense to HK’s wonderful creations, but I gotta declare Ratfishes the winner here. I prefer ratties to dogs that look like mutant rats.
October 23, 2011 at 1:06 pm
Rats are awesome. And I had no idea that putting a rat on top of a bunch of shit was a craft.
October 23, 2011 at 1:09 pm
Unrelated to the post, but how else am I gonna get your attention if you don’t read the forums and don’t know me on FB?
LOOK at the video SAM CORNWELL made for me!!!
Isn’t Sam just the best in the world?!?!?
October 23, 2011 at 1:42 pm
I’m glad I’m not the only one who thinks of the sharks.
I love that man a little bit.
October 23, 2011 at 6:06 pm
And I love you for loving spiders! Do you know I have had a black widow living inside my mailbox for months now? She’s got three egg sacks in there, and she seems to be a very attentive mother. Lucky for me, most of my mail goes to my PO Box, because it always makes me a little nervous taking mail out of the one at my house. One day there’ll be hundreds of baby black widows waiting to make my acquaintance.
October 23, 2011 at 10:07 pm
A brief note to your mail(wo)man might be in order. But don’t leave it inside the mailbox…
October 23, 2011 at 1:42 pm
Also you, that that was your video rant choice.
October 23, 2011 at 5:30 pm
EW! I never heard of that bastard before, but I now hope for his painful, terifying death. Soon.
Good deed Knitibranch!
October 23, 2011 at 5:30 pm
Aaaah, always love a good Sam rant. That was beautiful.
October 23, 2011 at 7:12 pm
Is Sam really a vegetarian? Swoon…
October 24, 2011 at 10:54 am
At first I thought: “That man must eat blood pressure pills like Skittles.” Then I thought: “That man’s videos are a great release that probably keep his blood pressure very close to normal.”
I decided to stick with the second one, because it helps me enjoy Sam’s rants instead of worrying that the top of his head will blow off any second.
October 23, 2011 at 1:15 pm
How did you get the dog to stand still long enough to get the cover over him?
October 23, 2011 at 1:29 pm
The same way she does everything else – mild narcotics and quick reflexes.
October 23, 2011 at 3:58 pm
The Kawaii French Country display stand is just the right size. The Chihuahua Fitz.
October 23, 2011 at 4:57 pm
I don’t think I’ve ever seen anything on the net that so exactly appeals to my sense of humour!! Unfortunately when I first saw this I was on a crowded train!
October 23, 2011 at 5:09 pm
Ungluded stacked shit? Come by my office & I’ll sell you the stack of shit of your choice. Includes vintage periodicals, upcycled student assignments, steampunk memos, and repurposed file folders with original artwork done in Sharpie! Use as cupcake plate, jewelry stand, nose-blows, ass-wipes, Twatwaffle smacker.
October 23, 2011 at 5:32 pm
But can I use it as a nightstand? I need a new nightstand.
October 23, 2011 at 7:35 pm
Buy 2 or 3 and I think they’d be tall enough. Convo me
October 23, 2011 at 5:41 pm
I’m sensing a new Fiverr sensation.
October 23, 2011 at 5:20 pm
there’s a Monty Python sketch about stacking things on other things…
October 23, 2011 at 5:33 pm
This brought to my mind this wonderful thing featured in Brit magazine “Viz”, who specialize in tear provoking piss taking spoof advertisements, (“Bears of Murder” dolls being another classic, oh and “The Life of Christ in Cats” plate.)
http://www.uponthedullearth.com/post/75566388/elvis-presley-dambusters-clock-plate-of
October 23, 2011 at 6:21 pm
If I can toot my own horn, THIS is how you upcycle glass shit into some serious steam-punkery…
October 23, 2011 at 6:21 pm
OMG! I saw those plates today at a yard sale. They were fugly then. With amber glass, fuglier.
October 23, 2011 at 7:27 pm
The funny thing is, I paid almost $150 for a Djembe (drum) just like the one with the Alarm Clock and rat glued to it 10 years ago. Hell, if I’d just waited for the Gods of Fuckery to provide this masterpiece, I could’ve got the thing for $35 *and* wouldn’t have gotten fired for being late…
October 23, 2011 at 8:37 pm
I think that most of those could and should be perched (perched???) above a passed out human, who is more likely to be male. Also with dicks drawn on his face.
October 23, 2011 at 10:32 pm
Wait fondue? MmmMmMmm… hot greasy beast parts…. ♥♥♥
October 28, 2011 at 5:11 am
CUSTOM SHABBY CHIC UPCYCLED KAWAII FRENCH COUNTRY CHIHUAHUA DISPLAY STAND
Can you not see that this is Vintage Steampunk?
November 4, 2011 at 10:28 am
I have this exact same awful plate. Time to make money.