When people get old they WISH that others would just fucking notice them and acknowledge their existence for fucks sake! HK is chock full of good works for humanity…don’t you fucking know that??
I am always looking for that one wardrobe item individual and classy enough to bridge the gap between Steam Punk, Victorian, Professional and 60′s rockstar.
I think “60′s Rockstar” is supposed to refer to someone who is a rockstar in the 1960′s, not a rockstar who is in their sixties. I could be mistaken, though.
ALL OF you people make me sick!!!! Dose making fun of people make you feel big and important!!!!! You are ALL small minded pieces of crap!!!!! GET A LIFE
I think that this is what I’m going to be for Halloween. I’m just gonna glue gears, octopuses and birds to a teeshirt and wear the shit out of it And of course I’ll have to call myself Lady E. Sparrowhawk Betson if I want to be fancy or Prof. Dr. Lorena Gear Bealty Brierton III if I want to be a crazy scientist trying to get my dirigible up and running again.
i only posted this, i think, cos she wants three hundred bucks for it.
i’m a vintage dealer of many intolerable years standing so i know it’s not worth that much. some of her other stuff isnt bad. very small, tho.
Judging by the picture, she is clearly a puritan and therefore having such a great body is a sin against god. It would be an even greater sin were she to enjoy it. Seriously, it is in such great condition I suspect she never took it out of the original packaging.
It is very odd. Neck up she looks like she has spent her life working hard on a ranch (could explain the muscles) but neck-down is ripped. A hair cut & smile and she’d look like a completely different woman.
Chronic Glitter Lung
September 24, 2011 at 2:27 pm
What about ‘Elizabethan Steampunk’? I envision Elizabeth I in a gown embroidered with gears, wearing a chain of state with a solid gold octopus attached.
Dose calling people small minded pieces of crap make you feel big and important? What about telling people to GET A LIFE?
And have you heard about a new invention called “the question mark?” It’s true. It can be used in place of exclamation points when you’re asking a question.
Cool, right!!!!!
oh and another thing – the “lace” is 100% polyester, which sure as hell didn’t exist in the 1940s. You used to be able to get it in the el cheapo clearance bins at Minnesota Fabrics for 2-3 dollars for an entire card, which would have 8-10 yards on it.
I hate it when sellers don’t know their vintage and pawn off garbage as authentic.
Let’s be uncharacteristically charitable and assume that it is lines of cracked paint on the door and not that she is going for the Shaggy on Scooby Doo look.
I am looking through her site, shell shocked….all the photos of her look like someone’s “last known photo”. There are huge feet and unshaved legs in unattractive shoes, hairy chins, wrinkled knees and way too many see through tops for someone who looks like she last smiled in 1952.
You know, we are always complaining about the over-sweet cupcake on Etsy. Somehow I’m thinking that this broad (in a good way) doesn’t fall in that category. She’s kind of growing on me – particularly since she appears to live in the mid-West and I’m East so I won’t have her as a neighbor.
I am not sure when I knew, but I think somehow I always knew. This is the funniest post I have seen on regretsy yet. Is this what love is supposed to feel like?
Or is it just the result of coming down from a marathon cram session fueled by NyQuil spiked espresso shots…?
“Size: Vintage 13. Xsmall-Small. Model’s a US2/4, 5 foot 3 inches with 32 bust and it fits her quite, quite well. A bustier 2/4 could fit this too. Check measurements against your bod and similar clothes”
I…I actually love this. Then again, I love putting bows and lace around my neck. (This is only okay until I graduate Art school and have to go live with normal people) Her face is great.
September 24, 2011 at 1:31 pm
American Gothic, ten years later.
The old man is dead. Sorry to bum you out.
September 24, 2011 at 1:42 pm
September 24, 2011 at 2:01 pm
God, I do such shitty gimp, but hey, I am learning…
September 24, 2011 at 2:17 pm
OMG He looks like a Pug wearing one of those vet collars
September 24, 2011 at 2:42 pm
Well, its no coincidence that those vet collars are called E-collars which stands for – you guessed it – Elizabethan collars!
September 24, 2011 at 4:01 pm
Gimp tip: Lower the opacity on the layer you are trying to erase so you can see what’s underneath.
September 24, 2011 at 5:27 pm
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September 24, 2011 at 7:17 pm
There’s no ageism here. We don’t discriminate here when it comes to making fun of ugly stuff. So suck it the fuck up and get over it, you whiny idiot.
September 24, 2011 at 8:39 pm
When people get old they WISH that others would just fucking notice them and acknowledge their existence for fucks sake! HK is chock full of good works for humanity…don’t you fucking know that??
September 25, 2011 at 12:08 am
Kinda presumptuous to assume that everyone here is younger than the ol’ lady up top, don’t you think?
September 25, 2011 at 12:26 pm
You say picking on old people is mean, then say it’s hilarious.
Do you live on Mars?
We’re picking on it because it looks ridiculous, not because she’s old. That’s just a sideshow.
But yea, we’re mean jealous wrinkled losers, so that makes us entitled. And I RhymeWithWitch.
September 24, 2011 at 1:36 pm
Reminds me of a William Wegman photo.
September 24, 2011 at 1:37 pm
I am always looking for that one wardrobe item individual and classy enough to bridge the gap between Steam Punk, Victorian, Professional and 60′s rockstar.
September 24, 2011 at 1:40 pm
Good God. This is why I don’t use myself as a model in my photos. Sad.
September 24, 2011 at 1:40 pm
The meth heads can be unpredictable:
September 24, 2011 at 1:41 pm
That woman obviously doesn’t fully appreciate the extent to which her levels of individuality AND class have risen.
She’s got that 60s rock star look nailed down beautifully though.
September 24, 2011 at 3:13 pm
I think “60′s Rockstar” is supposed to refer to someone who is a rockstar in the 1960′s, not a rockstar who is in their sixties. I could be mistaken, though.
September 24, 2011 at 8:41 pm
Same thing… Now!
September 24, 2011 at 3:21 pm
She does seem to have a problem “rocking” anything but perhaps a chair. Maybe she should go with “steampunk” or “professional” instead/
September 24, 2011 at 4:33 pm
Steampunk version
September 25, 2011 at 11:07 am
NOT ENOUGH OCTOPI!
September 24, 2011 at 1:45 pm
Why the long face? (._. )
September 25, 2011 at 9:35 pm
I’m sure if they gave her some peanut butter, they could make it look like she’s talking.
September 27, 2011 at 3:58 am
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October 12, 2011 at 11:29 am
This person is a porno spammer
zarbuma21@gmail.com
88.247.67.55
Porno spammers have their email and IP addresses posted, so you can return the favor. – HK
September 26, 2011 at 10:30 pm
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September 24, 2011 at 1:46 pm
Solemn hipster is solemn.
September 24, 2011 at 1:48 pm
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September 24, 2011 at 1:48 pm
I had no idea Keith Richards had a sister.
September 24, 2011 at 1:55 pm
Omg, it’s Gerald from Wallace & Ladmo’s sister!
September 24, 2011 at 1:56 pm
I should probably have put the words “The” and “Show” in there somewhere. Anyhow, she reminds me of Gerald from The Wallace & Ladmo Show.
September 24, 2011 at 3:47 pm
Hello Arizona! Yep, I had the same thought.
September 24, 2011 at 2:00 pm
Perfect for the stern governess in everyone’s life.
Mine gets paid by the hour >.>
September 24, 2011 at 2:00 pm
More like a 1690′s collar. She looks like she’s either about to burn a witch or be burned as one.
September 24, 2011 at 2:09 pm
Burn. In the 1690s, lace was expensive. You give the collar to your sister, THEN you go to the stake. No point being wasteful.
Unless, I suppose, your sister turned you in, in which case you might take the collar with you, out of spite. Also, cast a spell on her cows.
September 24, 2011 at 2:01 pm
It’s the “Phil Spector meets Nellie Olsen” look.
September 24, 2011 at 2:11 pm
Whistler’s Mother?
September 24, 2011 at 7:38 pm
WMILF.
September 24, 2011 at 2:11 pm
Spare the rod and spoil the lace.
September 24, 2011 at 2:11 pm
Now, can lace be steampunk? Discuss.
It’s such a staple of Victorian fashion, it seems as though it would have to be.
September 24, 2011 at 2:16 pm
It will be steampunk when you glue some gears and a brass octopus to it. You can steampunk the shit out of that.
September 24, 2011 at 2:56 pm
I think that this is what I’m going to be for Halloween. I’m just gonna glue gears, octopuses and birds to a teeshirt and wear the shit out of it
And of course I’ll have to call myself Lady E. Sparrowhawk Betson if I want to be fancy or Prof. Dr. Lorena Gear Bealty Brierton III if I want to be a crazy scientist trying to get my dirigible up and running again.
(there’s a steampunk name generator!!!http://oobleck.org/steam/)
September 24, 2011 at 4:36 pm
Not only is the name generator awesome, but the button you push says “Say my name!” Love it!
September 24, 2011 at 5:36 pm
September 24, 2011 at 8:27 pm
I think I love you.
September 24, 2011 at 9:11 pm
Elizabeth was into steampunk before steampunk was cool.
September 24, 2011 at 2:45 pm
Depends on if your tatting shuttle has cogs.
September 24, 2011 at 8:46 pm
So, where can I trade my tat in for the other thing?
September 24, 2011 at 2:13 pm
It suits her, in a weird sort of way. Very Puritan, very American Gothic.
September 24, 2011 at 2:14 pm
More as an art photo than a sales one for the collar, though.
September 24, 2011 at 2:14 pm
So..
No one had Phil Spector in mind?!?!
September 24, 2011 at 2:15 pm
Obviously a production still from the little-known movie sequel, “Hester Pryne: The Surly Years”.
September 24, 2011 at 2:18 pm
September 24, 2011 at 2:17 pm
…Mom?
September 24, 2011 at 2:18 pm
Oh cheezus, that’s the shop owner as the model. It seems she is now keeping her face out of the photo.
But then there is this. It’s like the Care Bears build a rainbow boardwalk up her body. Holy neon, Batman!
September 24, 2011 at 4:42 pm
Two table runners does not an outfit make.
Also, she does sometimes show her face (see prairie skirt)but she DOES NOT smile. Very serious about her shit.
September 24, 2011 at 5:23 pm
i only posted this, i think, cos she wants three hundred bucks for it.
i’m a vintage dealer of many intolerable years standing so i know it’s not worth that much. some of her other stuff isnt bad. very small, tho.
September 24, 2011 at 6:53 pm
Maybe the neon blinded her. She looks like she’s staring through walls.
And that coat…is it made of giraffe hair? That’s the only way I can think of that it would be worth that much.
September 24, 2011 at 7:40 pm
Look that the legs on that. No really, only fixate on the legs. Much better.
September 24, 2011 at 4:58 pm
Wow, the disconnect between her old-woman face and her rockin’ bod is kinda weird.
September 24, 2011 at 6:54 pm
YES!
If I had that body, nothing would keep the smile off of my face!
September 24, 2011 at 9:16 pm
Judging by the picture, she is clearly a puritan and therefore having such a great body is a sin against god. It would be an even greater sin were she to enjoy it. Seriously, it is in such great condition I suspect she never took it out of the original packaging.
September 24, 2011 at 8:03 pm
It is very odd. Neck up she looks like she has spent her life working hard on a ranch (could explain the muscles) but neck-down is ripped. A hair cut & smile and she’d look like a completely different woman.
September 25, 2011 at 9:39 pm
It’s rather disconcerting…
September 24, 2011 at 8:49 pm
MGMT IS PISSED OFF.
September 24, 2011 at 2:18 pm
I bought that ruff! It goes perfectly with my triceratops mask. I’ll acknowledge that it’s a niche market.
September 24, 2011 at 7:07 pm
Yeah, I can see it.
September 24, 2011 at 2:20 pm
I have no idea how, but you keep topping yourselves!!! kudos.. We are still laughing over the meth pic..
September 24, 2011 at 4:33 pm
Thanks, Dave!
September 24, 2011 at 2:22 pm
New category on Regretsy! “Things that are neither Elizabethan nor Steampunk.”
Dear Etsy Seller. Please watch at least one episode of Blackadder II before designing your next “Elizabethan collar”.
September 24, 2011 at 2:27 pm
What about ‘Elizabethan Steampunk’? I envision Elizabeth I in a gown embroidered with gears, wearing a chain of state with a solid gold octopus attached.
September 25, 2011 at 11:11 am
+5 for BlackAdder reference.
September 24, 2011 at 2:26 pm
September 24, 2011 at 2:27 pm
September 24, 2011 at 2:28 pm
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September 24, 2011 at 2:29 pm
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September 24, 2011 at 2:32 pm
That is the face of a woman who weighs the same as a duck.
You know what to do.
September 24, 2011 at 4:25 pm
’tis a fair court.
September 24, 2011 at 8:34 pm
“You are all individuals!”
“I’m not!”
September 24, 2011 at 9:00 pm
“it’s a fair cop”
September 24, 2011 at 2:45 pm
The Elizabethans of World War 2 were an Austere, Hardy, and extremely Rare lot.
September 24, 2011 at 2:55 pm
Let me guess. Dr. Who brought them, and they used secret codes from Shakespeare’s plays to baffle the Germans.
September 24, 2011 at 2:53 pm
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September 24, 2011 at 3:22 pm
She must have read the same Etsy Modelling Guidelines as the snood lady.
Coleslaw, zydeco, and constipation.
September 24, 2011 at 3:46 pm
What a difference a smile would have made!
September 24, 2011 at 4:38 pm
She didn’t include the full backstory. This is why she wasn’t smiling.
September 24, 2011 at 8:54 pm
And everyone knows it’s the backstory that sells it!
September 27, 2011 at 12:04 pm
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September 27, 2011 at 1:17 pm
Dose calling people small minded pieces of crap make you feel big and important? What about telling people to GET A LIFE?
And have you heard about a new invention called “the question mark?” It’s true. It can be used in place of exclamation points when you’re asking a question.
Cool, right!!!!!
September 28, 2011 at 7:31 pm
Oh look, a baby butt hurt; how cute!!
September 24, 2011 at 4:56 pm
I’d look like that too if I had to dress like a constipated Victorian era judge.
September 24, 2011 at 5:28 pm
i can’t believe no one has mentioned the barnwood – you know this will be FP on etsy soon.
September 24, 2011 at 5:40 pm
oh and another thing – the “lace” is 100% polyester, which sure as hell didn’t exist in the 1940s. You used to be able to get it in the el cheapo clearance bins at Minnesota Fabrics for 2-3 dollars for an entire card, which would have 8-10 yards on it.
I hate it when sellers don’t know their vintage and pawn off garbage as authentic.
(grumble grumble)
September 24, 2011 at 7:25 pm
Just about died laughing because I totally thought “faces of meth” before I scrolled down!
September 24, 2011 at 7:59 pm
Um…..
September 24, 2011 at 8:05 pm
Now I’m frowning.
September 24, 2011 at 8:31 pm
what do I do? I am so confused
September 24, 2011 at 8:32 pm
I’d kill to look like that….but that bikini needs to die in a fire.
September 25, 2011 at 10:44 am
It looks like one of those that are very cute – on THREE year-olds.
September 24, 2011 at 8:53 pm
Fit yet androgynous. I want to say that there might be a wee bit weenie in there. When you need the TSA to scope around, they aren’t there.
September 24, 2011 at 8:22 pm
She got outside in nothing but a hanky and the alarms didn’t go off…..that’s what I’ve always hated about Grandma’s nursing home.
September 24, 2011 at 8:33 pm
Is she wearing an area rug??
September 24, 2011 at 8:52 pm
its not covering enough area.
September 24, 2011 at 8:56 pm
Still no smile, but the glasses covering the soulless gaze make this much more tolerable.
September 24, 2011 at 10:55 pm
I mean she takes care of her body…so she must have some concept of presentation….but the hang dog, chronic depression face is not a seller.
September 24, 2011 at 9:03 pm
Mother! I brought the KIDS! Please put some pants on!
September 24, 2011 at 9:37 pm
I think she’s stuck. Like a neighbor crucified her across her own front door as a warning to “others”.
September 25, 2011 at 10:46 am
I do like the painting on the door. Very fun and bright on the stucco house. Maybe she should switch mediums?
September 24, 2011 at 8:30 pm
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September 25, 2011 at 10:48 am
Let’s be uncharacteristically charitable and assume that it is lines of cracked paint on the door and not that she is going for the Shaggy on Scooby Doo look.
September 25, 2011 at 12:05 pm
That’s obviously her hair hanging down on the other side of her head.
September 24, 2011 at 8:38 pm
I am looking through her site, shell shocked….all the photos of her look like someone’s “last known photo”. There are huge feet and unshaved legs in unattractive shoes, hairy chins, wrinkled knees and way too many see through tops for someone who looks like she last smiled in 1952.
September 24, 2011 at 9:02 pm
I’m kind of scared, but do you see a pile of dead chickens or dead animals next to her? Like maybe her dog is looking at them?
September 24, 2011 at 9:23 pm
The worst part about that is the appears to be the picture where her facial expression most closely resembles a smile.
September 24, 2011 at 9:36 pm
Maybe she operates one of those Body Farms used to train real CSI’s?
September 25, 2011 at 10:50 am
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September 25, 2011 at 10:52 am
You know, we are always complaining about the over-sweet cupcake on Etsy. Somehow I’m thinking that this broad (in a good way) doesn’t fall in that category. She’s kind of growing on me – particularly since she appears to live in the mid-West and I’m East so I won’t have her as a neighbor.
September 25, 2011 at 6:36 pm
I made a romper very much like that in 1977.
September 24, 2011 at 9:19 pm
September 24, 2011 at 10:41 pm
I am not sure when I knew, but I think somehow I always knew. This is the funniest post I have seen on regretsy yet. Is this what love is supposed to feel like?
Or is it just the result of coming down from a marathon cram session fueled by NyQuil spiked espresso shots…?
September 24, 2011 at 10:53 pm
September 24, 2011 at 11:10 pm
Roxie Hart no longer feel her Woolworth lampshade dress is no longer ugly as sin.
Because there is an uglier dress out there than hers. Well, it’s still ugly, but no longer the ugliest.
September 25, 2011 at 6:42 am
Holy Mother of God – she is tiny and skinny as hell.
In this listing, she is wearing a 1950s dress that is a juniors Size 13
http://www.etsy.com/listing/75462513/yellow-party-dress-floral-watercolor
Which means she has these approx measurements:
30
25
33
September 25, 2011 at 2:27 pm
“Size: Vintage 13. Xsmall-Small. Model’s a US2/4, 5 foot 3 inches with 32 bust and it fits her quite, quite well. A bustier 2/4 could fit this too. Check measurements against your bod and similar clothes”
That’s too very creepy.
September 25, 2011 at 8:50 am
Elizabethan 1940s propaganda posters. MAKE THIS HAPPEN.
September 25, 2011 at 8:58 am
I’ll start this show.
September 26, 2011 at 9:28 pm
Lips and armadas actually does rhyme if you use the Middle English pronunciation. #trollingstoned
September 25, 2011 at 11:59 am
September 25, 2011 at 8:54 am
I…I actually love this. Then again, I love putting bows and lace around my neck. (This is only okay until I graduate Art school and have to go live with normal people) Her face is great.