The Mighty Ducts
By now you know I don’t get creeped out very easily.
I’ve shown you a woman who vomits on canvases.
I’ve shown you a man who paints with his penis.
I’ve shown you a guy who squirts paint out of his blowhole.
I’ve even shown you this.
Yes, I’ve shown you a lot of horrible things, and I never even flinched. Did I? No, I didn’t.
In fact, I laughed. Oh, I laughed at you, but still, I laughed. You, with your I HAVE VOMIT ISSUES and TRIGGER! TRIGGER! And I sat here, drinking coffee and snorting in derision.
Until today.
Until this.
From: Erin
Date: September 22, 2011 9:51:10 PM PDT
Subject: Ocular Painting
To: helen@regretsy.com
Since you sometimes post awesome and crappy artists, I thought you’d be interested in this guy.
I can’t even watch the video. Ick, my skin is crawling.
Good luck. I lasted about 40 seconds.
September 23, 2011 at 9:46 am
Well, he’s got a hell of an eye for color.
September 23, 2011 at 11:43 am
I made it one minute and 58 seconds. I may have to go throw up now. If you like I can try to find a canvas first……….
September 23, 2011 at 12:38 pm
It strangely didn’t annoy me…. Hmmm, am I still HUMAN?!
September 23, 2011 at 12:53 pm
I hope so. I was ok, too. But I didn’t make it 2 seconds through the eye video posted by Diacritical Snark! I cound not close it fast enough!
September 23, 2011 at 2:40 pm
It didn’t bother me in the slightest.
September 23, 2011 at 4:46 pm
I found all the talking annoying when all I wanted to see was ocular ejaculation.
September 23, 2011 at 5:34 pm
After watching my first fear was that I was fucked up enough not be bothered at all by that.
In fact, I think it’s kind of cool!
September 23, 2011 at 6:00 pm
Very mild squick factor, but I made it all the way without gagging. The various animal parts featured on this site made my stomach very unhappy, but not so much this.
September 24, 2011 at 6:50 pm
I laughed most of the time, it was awesome (I miss one day of fuckery and it was one of the best in a long time, WTF!)
HK if you ever want a stomach turner, I did a presentation in my art and death class, rather then choosing to do art for funerary purposes, I did mine on art using the dead (people & animals)
September 24, 2011 at 12:30 pm
I think you’d put forth far greater art if you’d grab a canvas and view tubgirl.
September 24, 2011 at 4:50 pm
but, alas, it’s already been done.
September 23, 2011 at 9:46 am
No.
You have crossed a line here, Helen Killer. It was a very distant line and few have ever found it, but sure enough.
September 23, 2011 at 9:56 am
Somehow I’m actually way happier with him squeezing his eyeball into oblivion than squirting out the day’s stresses from his multicolored asshole.
September 23, 2011 at 12:05 pm
I agree. The most disturbing photo I’ve ever seen is that dude shitting paint. It actually makes me die a little inside.
This eye thing… pfffft!
September 23, 2011 at 5:08 pm
Agreed, the vomiting thing is grosser than this too. Obviously, everyone has different gross out points.
This just fascinated me though. How the hell does he do that? I need to go look up some medical diagrams, because I didn’t think that was possible. Of course, I never thought about squirting paint out of my tear ducts before, which is obviously why I will never be a cutting edge artiste.
September 23, 2011 at 6:29 pm
There’s a clip out there of a guy who shoots milk out of his eye duct. My limit on things you can’t unsee generally involves squeezing pus out of boils or maggot-infested wounds.
My first thought seeing this guy shooting paint out of his eye was “Should I forward this to my optometrist’s website/Facebook page?” Nah–I’d want to be there to see his reaction.
September 25, 2011 at 12:22 am
Grad student studying the eye- your tears actually drain into your nose, which is why your nose runs when you cry. And why both are salty (ew). I guess he’s somehow figured out how to make the duct go the other way
September 23, 2011 at 1:36 pm
I think this falls into the: Just Because You Can Do It, Doesn’t Mean You Should category.
I need to go blow my nose.
September 23, 2011 at 4:08 pm
What color paint?
September 23, 2011 at 8:18 pm
Let me take this to inappropriate-absolutely true-level.
Placenta colored. Oregon seems to punch me in the face every night.
I didn’t know I could make money with these bloody noses! Here I am wasting perfectly etsy-rific body fluids on Kleenex. It should be ‘found art’.
Sorry, being a bit of a crafthole tonight.
September 25, 2011 at 5:46 am
Ok, that’s it. Next time I irrigate my sinuses, I’m adding dye and standing over a piece of paper. I’m sure I could develop some “technique” and somehow convince people that this is not weird and disturbing at all.
Obviously, body-hole painting is the next thing. Using paintbrushes is so caveman. Get with the times, people!
September 23, 2011 at 3:38 pm
I’m not going to watch it. I’m not going to fall into the trap of “HK thinks I can’t watch this. I’ll show her.”
September 23, 2011 at 9:46 am
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! MY EYES!!!! HIS EYES!!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
September 23, 2011 at 9:58 am
my sentiments exactly.
September 23, 2011 at 3:15 pm
I’m sitting here rubbing my eyes.. and I had the sense and forethought to NOT click the video.. I haven’t watched one second even.. and I have no intentions to..
But I need to get my allergy pills and eye drops. I CANNOT STOP RUBBING MY EYES!
You can’t imagine what my reaction to “Pricasso” was!!
Oh wait… never mind.
September 23, 2011 at 9:47 am
I irony being that one day he will be too blind to see his own paintings.
September 23, 2011 at 1:05 pm
Is he seriously shooting actual paint out of his eyes??? Ick is right!
September 23, 2011 at 7:44 pm
Just when you think there are no orifices left from which to shoot paint, along comes eye paint guy.
I guess we haven’t seen nostril painting yet. Sneeze painting?
September 23, 2011 at 1:40 pm
Actually, if you had a strong stomach (or a totally un-phased one like mine…I mostly just got bored after 2 minutes or so) you’d see that he actually shopped around for the least toxic pigments to use. Which means he has probably thought this out more than any of the other gross-out artists before him. Bravo, guy who paints by taking advantage of his sinus passages. Bravo.
September 23, 2011 at 2:26 pm
My favorite part was when he said, when I am sad, I cry on my paintings. My heart went awwww
September 23, 2011 at 9:47 am
But can he paint with glitter?
September 23, 2011 at 10:06 am
I swear to god if Eyedazzling catches on I’m out.
September 23, 2011 at 10:23 am
Like this?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JslHtGG3xic
September 23, 2011 at 10:26 am
Holy Clockwork Orange!
September 23, 2011 at 10:49 am
What the Holy Fucking Hell?!?!?!?
September 23, 2011 at 11:35 am
So much harder to watch than the ocular painting! That was fucking torture!
September 23, 2011 at 12:41 pm
This smells an awful lot like a hipster to me? Shall I wash him? Also, I JUST saw my first hipster in the wild today… I nearly squeeeeeeeed, and would have taken a photo but I had the midget with me…. Damnit…. Seriously, this is west bloody Belfast…. I NEVER thought I would EVER see a real hipster here! We only have millies and spids…. And the occasional goth and rainbow child(ahem, that was me…)
September 23, 2011 at 3:03 pm
good god what is wrong with people — the eye painting guy above seems completely normal now, so I guess, thanks for that
September 23, 2011 at 3:18 pm
DIE DIE DIE DIE WTF~!?? WHY DID I CLICK THAT!@!!!@#@*$&^@*&%$ ??????
I was doing SO well not clicking HK’s video link and you DUPED me… DAMMIT!
I’m blind now.
Great, now how the hell am I going to get my Mochavodka refill if I cannot see?
Oh wait, here’s yesterday’s mug… mmmm.
September 23, 2011 at 4:09 pm
Wait what?! That’s a cosmetic procedure? Are there people who would have eye surgery just to have a fucking jewel implanted? The video didn’t bother me, at first I thought it was a cataract procedure. The only part that made me go WTF was when I realised it was a jewel in stead of a new lens that was being inserted….
September 24, 2011 at 9:46 pm
Okay, that settles it. If I ever go blind I am replacing my eyes with precious stones. I will make these eyebedazzlers green with envy.
September 26, 2011 at 2:34 pm
I hate you so fucking hard right now…
September 23, 2011 at 10:25 am
I’ve seen contact lenses with little dangly bits of glitter that hung off of the eye on a tiny thread. I can’t find a picture now, though Google shows there are plenty of plain old glitter contacts.
September 23, 2011 at 12:15 pm
I know what you are talking about! The boyfriend saw a pair of those dangly contacts on someone at a con and FREAKED… Needless to say, he literally howled when the paint started shooting out of this dude’s eye and hid under the covers… A manly man!
September 23, 2011 at 12:42 pm
Damn you! Now I can’t get they’re men, manly men, men in tiiiiiights… They stroll around the forest looking for fights…. Out of my head, I hope you’re pleased… I’m not….
September 24, 2011 at 4:58 pm
http://youtu.be/0lUjhEHlh7s Just for you, Gosh, now it really won’t get out of your head
September 24, 2011 at 3:23 am
I actually screamed.
September 23, 2011 at 10:20 am
I just can’t see it without the World trade towers in the background.
September 23, 2011 at 9:48 am
The way my body is designed, if I did that, it’d be coming out my ears AFTER I blew out my eardrums. I lasted all of about 45 seconds. I couldn’t watch anymore.
September 23, 2011 at 10:01 am
I made it to a minute and 11 seconds. Do I get a prize? You know, since my eyes can’t stop tearing up now….
September 23, 2011 at 10:08 am
I was going to watch the video when I got home later, but what you just wrote convinced me that I probably shouldn’t.
I owe you one.
September 23, 2011 at 12:35 pm
I second that. I have already read enough comments to know that I will never watch it. I think it will haunt me more if I do than if I don’t. Sites like rotten.com ruined me for life.
Not for me
September 23, 2011 at 12:44 pm
I watched it all. And continued eating pizza throughout. All I could think is; that’s not a very interesting canvas…. Thanks regretsy…
September 23, 2011 at 1:09 pm
When I’ve had sinus infections, I’ve blown my nose and stuff has come out of my eye duct, which just completely repulsed me. But, that was my own snot. I can’t imagine snarfing up paint or what have you and then shooting it out by way of my eye.
Holy shit on a stick, I have the willies.
September 23, 2011 at 2:20 pm
I can’t stop laughing and I don’t know why!
September 23, 2011 at 9:50 am
This may be a justifiable exception to Bronc’s prohibition on “eye bleach” and “threw up in my mouth”. And I did not even watch the damned video; just the thought gives me the willies.
September 23, 2011 at 9:51 am
Made it to 1:06 before I gagged on my peanut butter and jelly. I have no issues with eyes in general, but it seems unnatural for that squirting business…
September 24, 2011 at 7:20 am
I made it to 1:05, and I DO have issues with eyes. But it’s mostly eyeballs, not tear ducts. Still…couldn’t get past the first squirt.
September 23, 2011 at 9:51 am
I didn’t watch the whole video, but only because I got bored.
What? I have three kids and a disabled spouse. I’ve seen and done some gross stuff in the 22+ years as a mother and 17 years as a spouse to a disabled person that the video didn’t gross me out.
But I’m totally sharing this on my daughter’s FB page. She’s so squicked by anything eye-related that she can’t even get contacts.
September 23, 2011 at 9:51 am
Uh, that’s 17 years of him being disabled. We’ve been married for 25 years.
September 23, 2011 at 11:04 am
yeah after three kids of my own, not counting others, and many years of farm animal care, i really cant be squicked. I however can be annoyed by self important pricks…which this clearly falls under.
September 23, 2011 at 11:33 am
Agreed… it was weird, but meatspin was way more disturbing to me.
September 23, 2011 at 11:48 am
I guess not everyone likes that Dead or Alive song as much as I do…
September 24, 2011 at 7:21 am
Mom…?
September 23, 2011 at 9:51 am
When he gets a cold, it must be magical rainbows that he blows out of his nose instead of snot.
September 23, 2011 at 11:44 am
This guy must regularly netti pot like there’s no tomorrow.
September 23, 2011 at 9:52 am
Aww, that wasn’t so bad. I’m not bragging that I didn’t mind it, I just find this less disturbing than many of the things you’ve brought us.
But, speaking of, has anyone seen the video of the woman shoving a can of spaghetti-o’s into her vagina? It’s some kind of art… thing. An audience watches, and when she’s done, they applaud. You don’t necessarily see much, it’s more just the thought of having raw spaghetti-o’s in your cooch…
September 23, 2011 at 9:55 am
Wait, does she take it out of the can first?
September 23, 2011 at 9:58 am
I hope not.
September 23, 2011 at 10:03 am
Well she wouldn’t want to get them all dirty. She might get hungry later.
September 23, 2011 at 2:15 pm
Congrats, WhizbangDoor. I almost squicked for the first time ever at the eye painting, but you took the cake with the ‘she might get hungry later’ comment. I horfed a bit. I used to lurk 4chan as a teenager, so it takes a LOT to bother me. I’m impressed by you.
September 23, 2011 at 9:58 am
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I9lmvX00TLY&
TA-DAAAAAAAA
September 23, 2011 at 10:07 am
Jesus Christ. How long does it take to open a fucking can of Spaghetti-O’s? Watching her fight with that can opener was just as painful as the idea of having a bunch of pasta in your cha-cha.
September 23, 2011 at 2:23 pm
Exactly what I was thinking. That was ridiculous.
September 25, 2011 at 1:19 am
SET THE CAN ON THE FLOOR.
Jeezus. Fucking hipsters literally would not survive in the wilds of a supermarket by themselves.
September 23, 2011 at 10:11 am
What kind of drugs is she on? I just.. I don’t even..
September 23, 2011 at 10:14 am
That may have been the stupidest “art” I have ever seen. And I wanted to punch the kids wearing their hipster clothes. 20 year olds wearing their great grandma’s closet? Argh. I can’t even form complete sentences now!
September 23, 2011 at 1:52 pm
I’m pretty sure the description also lists this being done at a Forever 21. The cognitive dissonance of being in a chain store while doing hipster performance art was a delightful addition to that whole thing.
September 23, 2011 at 10:39 am
Oh, lord, I remember that one now. I’d blocked it behind my trauma wall until you bitches reminded me of it. Thanks a lot. 4,000 times more painful than the eye-painting video.
September 23, 2011 at 10:41 am
I really wanted to see her pour a can of Spaghetti-o’s into her cooch (probably for some of the same reasons I watched my brother shove beans up his nose when we were kids) but got so completely annoyed by the fact that she has obviously *never opened a fucking can of ANYTHING* in her life that the vagina dousing was no longer worth sitting through it. Ugh.
And the rapt attention of the crowd was more than just a little creepy. Well, except for creeper guy (in the upper right of the screen) – he seems to be both anxiously awaiting nudity and finding her struggle with the can opener hilarious.
September 23, 2011 at 11:03 am
I seriously fuckin’ hate hipsters. And performance art. And spaghetti-o’s. At least she’s right about something everything (especially that) is shit.
September 23, 2011 at 11:41 am
I was watching this and there was an ad for Gordon Ramsey at KMart “Mean tools for happy cooking”, and for some reason I just laughed and laughed and laughed. What the fuck is wrong with hipsters?!
September 23, 2011 at 12:27 pm
When she starts smearing brown stuff all over her and looses her ability to speak, I can’t help but think that she must have opened a bad can of spaghetti-o’s… Botulism anyone?
September 24, 2011 at 7:28 am
Yeah, WTF?!
September 24, 2011 at 7:32 am
I hit a bad key; I wasn’t done.
Seriously, WTF??? Spaghetti-O’s are not brown-black with the consistency of shoe polish. I didn’t make it past 3:35 with all that “buh– puhh– bullshit. This is not art. This is pretending to be mentally ill and/or disabled. This makes me angry.
September 23, 2011 at 12:43 pm
UH-OH, Bajing-os!
September 23, 2011 at 12:47 pm
Yeah, they were ALL there to see the other art….
September 23, 2011 at 1:04 pm
You do not want to put anything remotely associated with sugar in that area. You just don’t!
September 23, 2011 at 3:55 pm
Thanks WhizbangDoor. That’s 7 minutes and 42 seconds of my life I’ll never get back.
Ii, Ah, Er, uh, eee, ih, eck. Now watch me squirt some filthy shit out of my vagina.
I hope the $20 she charged a head will be enough to cover her gyno visit and her prescirption for a serious case of bacterial vaginosis. I pray that she gets run over by a bus on her way to the clinic.
Fucking hipsters.
September 24, 2011 at 7:33 am
I wish I could drive that bus.
September 26, 2011 at 2:57 pm
Soooooo, she emulates tourettes, stroke, and dementia patients and calls it art.
Well sign me the fuck up!
September 23, 2011 at 9:59 am
Surprisingly, I made it through the whole thing and I also didn’t find it as disturbing as some of the other things we’ve seen here. But I do dislike that I’ll now associate one of my favorite Gotan Project songs with this “technique.”
September 23, 2011 at 10:30 am
The best thing about this video of a woman shoving Spagetti-os up her douchecanoe is the load of hipsters watching with looks of attempted intelligence. It is it’s own brand of know-nothing snobbery.
September 23, 2011 at 12:04 pm
They look so apprehensive at the beginning of the video. Like, HOMG HOMG HOMG WHEN IS SHE GOING TO OPEN THAT CAN???
September 23, 2011 at 11:12 am
Uh oh!
September 23, 2011 at 12:42 pm
That reminds me of a porn I once saw…(no, I’m serious, and I’m going to tell you about it)
Seattle has an annual amateur porn contest, and one year, there was a film where a woman put all manner of things into and pushed them out of her vajay, but the most stunning display of all was when a very large wire whisk was inserted. Thanks to the virtue of the whisk being a whisk and sort of see-through, the film was able to transcend the porn category and slide right into “gynecological informational video.”
Live uterus!
September 23, 2011 at 12:45 pm
And I wish I hadn’t said “slide right into”
September 23, 2011 at 2:22 pm
Oh I don’t know, it added that something special to your comment, which was very well written.
September 23, 2011 at 1:40 pm
I love the Seattle amateur porn contest! They come (giggle) up with some of the oddest things I have seen. Well. Until Regretsy.
September 23, 2011 at 9:52 am
omg! that is so weird. when my son was little, he could blow bubbles out of his tear ducts when he was underwater. i thought he was the only one. (sorry this wasn’t a funny or smarmy or snarky comment)
September 23, 2011 at 10:08 am
My brother once sneezed some broccoli out of his tear duct. He could also blow bubbles. This type of thing no longer bothers me.
September 23, 2011 at 10:20 am
“sneezed some broccoli out of his tear duct”
Like a whole floret or what? Now I’m going to have to spend at least a couple of hours wondering how this is even possible.
September 23, 2011 at 10:29 am
The mental picture of a broccoli floret shooting out of someone’s eye has me laughing so hard, I might just do it myself. And I haven’t eaten broccoli in weeks.
September 23, 2011 at 11:37 am
Through my tears of laughter I’m picturing a green version of one of those “tree” men… you know the ones with the out of control warts that they exploit on TLC?
September 23, 2011 at 11:54 am
Stuff like that squicks the hell out of me. Hell, even this experience squicked me, and it was comparatively tame.
Needless to say I couldn’t watch the video Helen posted. ACK.
September 23, 2011 at 12:10 pm
Awww…. I’m picturing a tiny, little floret popping out of his eye – like a mini-tree on a mini-hill.
Cute! I’d just leave it there. What? You don’t like my eye-tree?
September 23, 2011 at 10:13 am
I have a “faulty tear duct” or so I’ve been told. Occasionally when I blow my nose super hard, I get a little extra present in my eye.
September 23, 2011 at 11:12 am
I had a really bad cold, I was blowing my nose and heard a pop from right around my eye. Now whenever I sneeze or blow my nose I get tears (just tears so far) running down my face. I have nightmares about getting horrible eye infections that start as sinus infections.
Needless to say I did not watch that.
September 23, 2011 at 11:57 am
A guy I know had some kind of surgery done on his head (I forget exactly what) and it messed up his tear duct on the one side. His left eye is connected to his mouth in a way that it shouldn’t be. So now, whenever he salivates, tears run down that side of his face.
September 23, 2011 at 10:46 am
My mom used to be on blood thinners and would get nosebleeds that wouldn’t stop. One time they packed her nostrils at emerg. When we got her home blood started coming out her tear ducts. So yeah. Why someone would do that on purpose is beyond me.
September 23, 2011 at 11:14 am
Something like that happened to my grandma. She lost like 3 pints of blood through her nose. My dad and I never really liked her, but we were the ones stuck in the hospital watching her hork up blood clots. I have a REALLY strong stomach, but that really made me want to run away screaming. Thankfully I brought my laptop so I could pretend to be working on my thesis and not have to look.
September 23, 2011 at 11:27 am
My husband sneezed a pea out of his nose once and he got offended when I laughed about it. In my defense, it was REALLY funny.
September 23, 2011 at 12:17 pm
OK so apparently the way to get me caught in a giggle loop is to shoot vegetables out of unlikely faceholes.
Who knew?
You guys have no idea how badly I needed this kind of a laugh. Thanx!
September 23, 2011 at 1:52 pm
I’ve had it happen with chewed up carrot. And once a tuna noodle salad. :/
September 24, 2011 at 5:02 pm
we once got someone to laugh so hard while they were eating apple pie. boy were they pissed. The cinnamon was burning his nasal passages.
September 23, 2011 at 3:47 pm
Shit man, she could be an extra on True Blood! No special effects required!
September 23, 2011 at 9:52 am
This post made me long for the good old days when all we did was make fun of skants and barn wood.
September 23, 2011 at 9:56 am
The line for the disappointed starts over there.
September 23, 2011 at 10:07 am
What if he eye-painted on barn wood?
September 23, 2011 at 10:22 am
What if he eye-painted on skants?
September 23, 2011 at 11:14 am
How about skants hanging on the side of a barn?
September 23, 2011 at 6:39 pm
What if he wore skants while painting on barn wood?
September 23, 2011 at 9:52 am
Oh fer cryin’ out loud!
September 23, 2011 at 11:05 am
i see what you did there (heh i said see)
September 23, 2011 at 9:53 am
I take back all the nasty things I ever thought or said about the penis painter. Just make it stop…
September 23, 2011 at 9:53 am
I had to stop at 1:45.
guh
September 23, 2011 at 9:54 am
And here you made fun of that guy for putting his blood, sweat, and tears into his work!
September 23, 2011 at 9:55 am
Have we come across anyone who paints with their own snot or buggers? I mean, besides pre-schoolers?
No! Don’t google it!
September 23, 2011 at 10:06 am
C’mon, you knew someone was gonna do it.
September 23, 2011 at 10:56 am
Please don’t tell me that anyone over 4 yrs. old made this in their “artistic abilities”.
September 23, 2011 at 11:01 am
Must be over 4, he’s got his own website and sells his artistic abilities: http://iangamache.com/art.php
September 24, 2011 at 7:41 am
I did pen and ink cartoon work back in the ’80s. Got a lot published, but never got the least little bit famous, and now I know why.
INK. WTF was I thinking???
September 25, 2011 at 1:29 am
Psh, amateur hour. You should have seen the sweet installation/performance art/mural my 5-year-old self had going on the wall next to my bed! That thing had strata.
September 23, 2011 at 10:43 am
I searched Etsy for booger art awhile back, and while I failed to find any, I did have fun putting together this treasury. Bon apetit!
September 23, 2011 at 11:03 am
You’ve inspired me! Can you violate Etsy’s TOS by putting together mature treasuries, though?
September 23, 2011 at 9:56 am
I know myself better than to watch that delightful little snippet, but I would like to award you 700,000 clever points for the title of this post.
September 23, 2011 at 9:57 am
“I discovered this technique while I was trying to find something in my career as an artist.”
ACTUAL TRANSLATION:
I already saw all the other artists that April put up, so I figured I’d try and top it. I’ll soon be shooting videos of me ‘eye painting’ in a thong, while dancing, and charging $5 for me to paint any message or greeting you’d like.
September 23, 2011 at 10:06 am
“Find something different” is what I got caught up on too. “Hmmm, I have no actual artistic talent, and most of the other holes have already been done….”
September 23, 2011 at 11:29 am
Yeah, that’s the first thing I think of when I see extreme crap like this – someone who needs a gimmick to get attention because they’re just don’t have the talent for any conventional form of art.
I’m pretty sure it’s at least two steps below painting giant roses in the sky.
September 25, 2011 at 1:30 am
It’s the orifice version of “put a bird on it.”
September 23, 2011 at 9:57 am
I lasted the whole time. (That’s what happens when you watch too many horror movies growing up.) Cool beans! Yet another orifice from which to spray fluids. I see the Japanese totally owning eyeball bukkake.
He says that what would really bother him is if he’s not acknowledged as being the author of this technique. I beg to differ! I have seen frat boys perfecting this technique since 1985.
September 23, 2011 at 10:11 am
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
September 23, 2011 at 12:52 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
September 23, 2011 at 1:11 pm
Totally agree.
September 23, 2011 at 9:57 am
You topped everything. Wow, I hope I never see this again and I did not even really look at it!
September 23, 2011 at 9:57 am
Guh. I can’t even make myself hit play right now. The preview image on the video is keeping my cursor away.
September 23, 2011 at 9:58 am
Gross, but perhaps not as gross as this little girl who cries crystals: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uIgFKTu7qrs
September 23, 2011 at 12:27 pm
Ok, that’s actually pretty fucking cool!
September 23, 2011 at 12:28 pm
Damn. Hardcore glitter tears.
September 23, 2011 at 2:48 pm
That was super cool. Def not gross.
September 23, 2011 at 9:58 am
What, no Sparkles?
September 23, 2011 at 9:59 am
My cat has alergies and always has runny red tear goop. It puts stains on the pillowcase on her bed that neither Biz, bleach, Shout nor Oxyclean can budge.
Anyone want to buy some of her art?
September 23, 2011 at 10:01 am
Mind you, it has great sentimental value to me, so I’d have to price it really high, but if you REALLY want it…
September 23, 2011 at 10:48 am
Only if its heart shaped and she made kittens on it
September 23, 2011 at 10:49 am
Can you make up some high-quality prints of the art, to sell to those of us unable to afford the original?
September 23, 2011 at 1:34 pm
Oh, sorry, we don’t make kittens here, everybody shoots blanks.
But maybe I should mention, she’s a Kitler. That should drive up the value.
I could perhaps slip a few blank artist cards under her head while she’s sleeping…
September 23, 2011 at 12:37 pm
You need to get the stuff from the pet store designed to remove “protein (ie tear) stains” from their fur – works like a charm!
September 23, 2011 at 1:37 pm
Wot, and ruin a potential masterpiece?
(I’ll look for that, thanks!)
September 23, 2011 at 10:00 am
I didn’t find this gross. I could gross you out more. I have open tear ducts like that. When I get a sinus infection and try to blow my nose, guess where it comes out? Not my nose!
September 23, 2011 at 10:02 am
Thank you for that wonderful imagery.
September 23, 2011 at 10:05 am
Heh, I can’t do that but I can sometimes whistle with my left eye.
September 23, 2011 at 11:04 am
You WHAT?
September 23, 2011 at 11:16 am
The ol’ squeaky eye? I get sometimes. My dad loses his shit if I start squeaking my eye and he’s nearby. For some reason it totally squicks him out. Pfft, I can’t see why.
September 23, 2011 at 4:08 pm
If my eyes ever squeak, I’ll stick a spork in ‘em.
September 23, 2011 at 11:17 am
Mine hasn’t gotten that bad yet. But I still put my ring finer over my tear duct and press whenever I have to blow my nose.
September 23, 2011 at 10:00 am
Why the fuck is that video 5 minutes long? Why the fuck did I last those 5 minutes?
September 23, 2011 at 10:01 am
To think it all started when he locked himself in his room, and he still has the sheet which he keeps as a treasure.
If I was this guy’s mom and found bed sheets all stiff with rainbow colors, I’d wonder if my kid was the second coming of Jesus.
September 23, 2011 at 10:05 am
… when he said sheets I thought he was talking about sheets of paper
September 23, 2011 at 10:08 am
…coming.
I see what you did there.
September 23, 2011 at 10:03 am
I think what we have here is a case of someone trying too hard. Get a fucking paintbrush.
September 23, 2011 at 10:03 am
Couldn’t watch it. I have issues with things that aren’t tears coming out of eyes. I found that out when I saw this music video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cDqNcCuFIzE
September 23, 2011 at 2:00 pm
Fun Fact: The original script of “The Empty Child” went something like that video, but then someone managed to get Moffat to take his pills again.
September 23, 2011 at 10:25 pm
That one actually made me snicker a little. Way too corny.
September 23, 2011 at 10:04 am
Something must be wrong with me if that video could gross out HK, but leave me mostly bored… maybe it’s because I just woke up XD
My nightmares are far more disturbing.
September 23, 2011 at 10:04 am
See, I’m normally disgusted by eye related things.
But years of hanging out with boys who think spamming me with meatspin, Mr. Hands, jar squatter, the pain olympics, tub girl, and of course good ol’ Goatse seems to have rendered my gag reflex extinct. I didnt even get goosebumps.
Or maybe I’m just a robot >:D
September 23, 2011 at 10:26 am
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
September 23, 2011 at 12:14 pm
Good for you!
September 23, 2011 at 11:07 am
Aww godammit you made me google 3 of those, see what you done?
September 26, 2011 at 7:30 am
Okay, something must be wrong with me. I can’t handle tub girl, I thought the mucus art above was disgusting, I won’t watch the guy who shoots paint out his ass, I though the vomit artist was gross…I could go on and on. But Mr. Eye Squirting Painter? No problems at all. I made it through the whole video, and mostly felt sorry for him that he had to use such a gimmick to distinguish himself. Just another form of suffering for your art, I suppose. (He wouldn’t be the first to cry over a canvas; just the first to paint with his tears). Go figure.
September 23, 2011 at 10:06 am
Hmm. Perfectly timed to coincide with my allergy attack. How did you know?
September 23, 2011 at 10:07 am
I’m gonna start snortin glitter during allergy season. Then I will literally be able to cry glitter tears and blow glittery snot ” candles” out of my nose.
September 23, 2011 at 10:11 am
Careful, you might violate someone’s copyright.
September 24, 2011 at 5:10 pm
yes, and then you’ll have the douche nozzle named Dennis Waldron who will go after you for copyright infringement on your glitter mucus, get your hotmail account shut down and get the FBI after you.. (still makes me laugh thinking about these idle threats) LOL. Aren’t we just a fat, jealous loser? Namaste bitches.
September 23, 2011 at 10:08 am
I wonder if he has rainbow boogers from shooting paint into his sinuses like that.
September 23, 2011 at 10:55 am
I used to have rainbow boogers, when I was in printing, from the mist the rollers give off. It was fun! and the solvents were pretty nasty (&nada for safety gear) so my nail quicks would chap and crack… anyway, I often had little pockets of pus at the corner (y’know, where ingrowing happens) and I would sometimes squeeze out cyan, magenta, yellow or black pus! Great fun! I used to HOPE for those little infections.
September 23, 2011 at 3:18 pm
Why didn’t you save them to sell as art? Damn hindsight!
September 23, 2011 at 10:27 pm
Fingerpainting- now with real finger pus!
September 23, 2011 at 10:09 am
Back in elementary school I knew a couple kids who’d do this with milk. Never thought to turn it into art, though. Just shows you how short-sighted children can be. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have paper-footballs and folded paper “fortune tellers” to dip in glitter and sell for $4000 apiece.
September 23, 2011 at 10:12 am
Awesome. Gross. Awesomely gross.
September 23, 2011 at 10:12 am
He discovered it by trying to get high off paint fumes, I’m sure.
September 23, 2011 at 10:13 am
Watched the whole thing, not really that icked out by it.
Just wondering why? I mean, you could get the same effect with a squirt bottle (which is basically what is eye is being used as). Same thing with shooting paint out of your asshole or slapping your penis on things.
I guess it’s more performance art than like art on the wall art. I fucking hate performance art.
September 23, 2011 at 10:53 am
Except Mr Slappy needs the canvas to know it’s a dirty bitch.
September 23, 2011 at 10:14 am
LOL this post is hilarious! I though I was only one who could do this. Allergy season is always a blast because I can blow my nose through my eye! Who knew I was an artistic phenom!?!
Yeah, I probably should have kept that a secret…
September 23, 2011 at 10:15 am
I’ll bet doctors dread asking him to blow his nose.
It makes me wonder if he ever gets eye infections.
September 23, 2011 at 10:15 am
It doesn’t seem that much different from what a horned toad does.
September 23, 2011 at 10:16 am
I just realized what this dude should do for the rest of his life:
GWAR COVERS OF EMO SONGS.
September 23, 2011 at 10:57 am
I wish to know more!
September 23, 2011 at 10:16 am
please, that is so 80′s, “I am an artist, I am different, I am special, whine, whine, whine.” It’s over and the kid at the Art Institute that painted with poo because he couldn’t marry his boyfriend, now what ya gonna do??
I, too, hate performance art, they are the kings of bogus, bs, “art”. Just too poor to get a therapist and get over yourself already.
September 23, 2011 at 10:16 am
I was all set to bitch about him taking the sexiness out of being an artist, and then he mentioned that he listens to tango while he snorts and shoots paint into/out of his orifices. Rowr.
September 23, 2011 at 11:10 am
Last Tango in Ocularis.
September 23, 2011 at 10:16 am
I’m in the mostly just bored category. I find the anus painting guy much more disturbing (but probably just because it reminds me of tub girl. *shudder*)
It all just seems way too “look at me, I’m so different, envy my gigantic balls”
I mean, really, he could make the same shit with the little squirt bottle he shoves up his nose without the sinus infection risk.
September 23, 2011 at 10:17 am
Eyeball gleeking!
September 23, 2011 at 11:11 am
Oh thank goddess someone else who knows about gleeking! Good ol’ Unca Cecil.
September 23, 2011 at 10:19 am
yeah after 2 and half minutes i got bored…
September 23, 2011 at 1:42 pm
Yup yup. That was my mark too.
September 23, 2011 at 10:19 am
I got a minute and a half in before I couldn’t stand the bullshit anymore. Plus I think I’ve seen this video before.
Your family thought you were going crazy? That’s because you are.
This takes snorting things that you shouldn’t to a whole new level.
September 23, 2011 at 10:31 pm
I made it all the way through- but I had my sound muted and didn’t bother reading the stuff at the bottom. I just waited for the eye squirting bits.
September 23, 2011 at 10:20 am
He’ll cry you a river. Then he’ll cry you some bushes and trees. He might even cry you some scenic mountains in the background.
September 23, 2011 at 10:25 am
September 23, 2011 at 11:12 am
Uphill both ways, in the snow during a blizzard! And we LIKED it!
September 25, 2011 at 1:38 am
He actually painted that very commute, as we can see above. Plus all the polar bears he had to fight, too.
September 23, 2011 at 12:03 pm
…and the only paint available was pigmented with highly toxic chemicals and metals. And we LIKED it that way!
September 23, 2011 at 11:44 am
September 23, 2011 at 12:24 pm
September 23, 2011 at 10:23 am
September 23, 2011 at 10:25 am
I dunno…..how artistic can that be….he wasn’t using a Neti pot!
September 23, 2011 at 1:25 pm
I agree! Imagine what these guys could do: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KZ1TwWcsb08&feature=player_embedded
September 26, 2011 at 7:37 am
What the…is there NOTHING that they won’t make into a competition?!
September 23, 2011 at 10:27 am
I have to thank you all for the best “rabbit hole” of YouTube goodness composed of stuff being put in stuff OR coming out of stuff that it shouldn’t be coming out of or going into…stuff. My eyes are teary and if i had a Bajingo it would ache. You fat jealous losers rock my world.
September 23, 2011 at 10:30 am
Oh my fucking god, call me a pussy, but I couldn’t even look at the still images you posted let alone the video! Gives me the creeps, just like the kids used to do that thing where they turn their eyelids inside out… yuck!!!
September 23, 2011 at 11:02 am
Ditto. And I happened to put some eyeliner on an hour ago, trying it out (I don’t do makeup generally).
Now that I’m all creeped out I think I can feel that eyeliner, getting in my eyes, chafing and corroding… aauuuugh!
September 23, 2011 at 12:05 pm
My friend says that any time she uses a netti pot, a bunch of black makeup sludge comes out of her nose along with the snot, etc. Apparently eyeliner does seep into your tear ducts and into your head.
You’re welcome!
September 23, 2011 at 10:33 am
I’m certainly not going to watch that at all! You will not trick me HKpril.
I wore contacts for many years, and I now have implanted contacts…so I’m not as squicky about eyes as some people. But I still want no part of this.
He’s going to die of some horrid infection, and no one will buy his art even after that.
September 23, 2011 at 10:44 am
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fnjAnvIjCUk&feature=player_embedded
September 26, 2011 at 7:41 am
Okay, that was kind of cool. Bet his yearly eye doctor visits are VERY interesting.
September 23, 2011 at 10:47 am
I just got one reaction…
Why??
September 23, 2011 at 11:13 am
Because.
September 23, 2011 at 10:48 am
I think this guy is fucking awesome. But, that might be just because he’s also handsome as hell and I want to suck his cock.
No, he’s pretty awesome regardless.
September 23, 2011 at 12:09 pm
I wouldn’t suck his cock if I were you. It’s probably where he keeps his turpentine.
September 23, 2011 at 10:51 am
I watched all the way through, no problem. There was a guy on Letterman about a decade ago who did this with milk (so you could see it) as a Stupid People Trick.
I found it more interesting than disgusting
September 23, 2011 at 10:52 am
I think he has fine art confused with circus sideshow.
September 23, 2011 at 11:01 am
Yeah, I logged in soley to say the ONLY thing that bothered me about this, is the fact he kept calling it art, with a straight face.
September 23, 2011 at 10:57 am
I see no long-term side-effects associated with this. Clearly, man was meant to run pigment up a duct that is designed to drain tears away from the eye. It’s not like your eyes, sense of smell, and your fucking sanity are at risk.
September 23, 2011 at 11:13 am
You think this guy is sane?
September 23, 2011 at 11:39 am
yeah, he at the very least is a narsisitic personality.
September 23, 2011 at 11:00 am
Sorry, i just plain laughed my ass off all the way through the video…too funny, too ridiculous,
too stupid. Really.
September 23, 2011 at 11:01 am
Jesus H Christ on a popsicle stick, GAAAAAAKKKKKKKK
I’d quite prefer the penis-painting guy to this vomitron, thank u very much
September 23, 2011 at 11:02 am
Ironically his paintings are shittier than the blow hole painter’s are.
September 23, 2011 at 11:03 am
I’m not looking, I’m not looking, I’m not looking…
…
DAMMIT APRIL!
September 23, 2011 at 11:12 am
… Actually, once you get past the whole “WHY???” its almost funny. It looks like his eye is peeing.
September 23, 2011 at 11:16 am
If only Crying Glitter Eagle could paint the twin towers red white and blue, with a squirt of glitter of course.
Hey! Can someone do a GIF of that?
September 23, 2011 at 11:25 am
Great, now eye have to flounce.
Where’s the Visine?
September 23, 2011 at 11:27 am
Call me crazy, but I’m pretty sure that you shouldn’t be shooting anything up your nose and out your eyeball on purpose as a regular activity. It’s going to irritate the hell out of his sinuses, and he seems to always use the same eye so all the pressure he’s putting on it will break blood vessels and I’m sure his eye and surrounding tissue will not be happy with him.
What bothers me the most is that his art isn’t anything special. I’d rather by a painting made by a three legged cat on roller skates, thank you very much. THAT’S what I call performance art.
September 23, 2011 at 11:28 am
*buy. Derp.
September 23, 2011 at 12:27 pm
Holy shit so would I!
IS there a painting by a three-legged cat on roller skates? Because there should be…
September 23, 2011 at 11:31 am
I’m really surprised no one has mentioned the astounding similarity to this yet:
Narrator: “Has there ever been a weirder use of eye sockets– or blood?!”
Clearly this man needs to visit Regretsy more often!
September 23, 2011 at 11:32 am
Sorry for the technical difficulties folks…
September 23, 2011 at 11:34 am
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gEl6TXrkZnk&ob=av3e
I GIVE UP ON EMBEDDING THINGS.
September 23, 2011 at 11:48 am
Try putting [img src=" before the URL and then "] after it. Replace { and ] with
September 23, 2011 at 9:10 pm
That is the coolest damn thing I have seen all day and it’s only noon where I am. Thank you!
September 23, 2011 at 9:14 pm
I didn’t mean to “thumbs up” my own post! Anyway, I told my husband I wanted to own a blood squirting lizard just so I could poke it and make it defend itself and he said (making poking motions) “Stop bleeding yourself to death, stop bleeding yourself to death…” I love my husband.
September 25, 2011 at 12:58 am
Glad I’m not the only person who was like “eyeball squirting? I totally know a guy!” :p
September 23, 2011 at 11:36 am
I didn’t know it was possible to do that. Next time I take a shot to the eye during sexy time, I’m gonna fire right back
September 23, 2011 at 11:49 am
0.o What does it say about me that I know exactly what you’re talking about?
September 23, 2011 at 11:52 am
I don’t know..but I don’t see it as a problem!
September 23, 2011 at 11:36 am
Weird – I tend to be relatively squeamish, but add me to the (apparently short) list of people who don’t find this all THAT icky. I mean, it IS kind of squirm-inducing, but not nearly as much as vomit. That’s probably the worst thing for me, and even nearly eight years as a mother hasn’t dulled that.
Just off the top of my head, the worst things I’ve seen on this site so far are the chicken skin mask and the runner’s bloody nips. If there are others, I’ve thankfully managed to banish them from my memory.
September 23, 2011 at 11:41 am
I had a friend growing up who used to squirt milk out her eyes like this because she liked grossing people out… Yep, still freaky as hell.
September 23, 2011 at 12:02 pm
God damn it, Helen! I was in the middle of enjoying breakfast, but now I’m left with a bunch of toast that I don’t have the appetite for anymore.
Until I slather on like a stick of butter.
September 23, 2011 at 12:04 pm
Is this how Jackson Pollock got started?
September 23, 2011 at 12:09 pm
New Skittles Onion: Cry the Rainbow.
September 23, 2011 at 12:17 pm
LOL this is hilarious! I enjoyed some buttered toast while watching this. I can also eat through Hoarders- try it, it is harder than eating through a gore-filled movie because it is real life grossness.
September 23, 2011 at 12:20 pm
September 23, 2011 at 12:53 pm
Amazing that it still looks like shit.
September 23, 2011 at 5:37 pm
Oh, this is just fucking brilliant! I would give you 1000 up thumbs if I could!
September 23, 2011 at 12:24 pm
He’s concerned he won’t get credit? Please!
September 23, 2011 at 12:25 pm
I think April needs an MRI. I believe the part of her brain that processes gross images is broken.
LOL
September 23, 2011 at 12:34 pm
Whatever happened to just using brushes to paint? ._.
September 23, 2011 at 12:40 pm
The images in the original post were enough for me. No way am I watching that.
*shudder*
September 23, 2011 at 12:56 pm
The only thing left for us now is art via female ejaculation.
September 23, 2011 at 1:51 pm
Until somebody figures out a way to shoot colored milk out their tatas, I think you’re right.
September 24, 2011 at 9:52 am
Fuck. I know someone who does that and now I want to tell her to fill her bajingo with paint first. Is that bad?
September 23, 2011 at 1:18 pm
What can I say. The beauty IS in the eye of the beholder. Literally. I think though, it would be so much cooler if he actually could sign his retinart with the his eye!
This makes me sad. Just because you discovered an extra hole to squirt shit out of doesn’t mean you are an “artist”.
September 23, 2011 at 1:23 pm
I had to skip right on past the PHOTO of the video, could not even look at it.
September 23, 2011 at 1:25 pm
Wow. He was actually kinda good looking until that. Interesting how some flaws just make you a little… distant.
Anyway, have to agree with the multicolored bum post.
I lasted 52 seconds.
September 23, 2011 at 1:38 pm
I have a stint in my tear duct right now. I had a mutant pink eye infection last year and it scarred two of my ducts closed. They had to balloon them open and there is the stint from my nose, in one duct, across my eye, into the other duct, back into my nose and knotted with the other end. In about 6 weeks (I’ve had it since May) they will take it out and hopefully I will be good as new*.
I could probably paint like this.
* as new as close to 40 can be.
September 23, 2011 at 1:39 pm
close to new. not new to close. der
September 25, 2011 at 1:01 am
I just assumed you were “close to 40″ — you’re what, like 29? 30?
September 23, 2011 at 1:46 pm
Just the pictures… have disturbed me greatly. I am not even clicking play. I’m not going there. Paint out your asscavity? Sure. I can deal. Vomit on canvas? Okay… I get a little queazy, but I’ll hold. This though? NO FRIGGIN’ WAY. I am squeezing my eyes shut tight and trying to wipe the thought from my head. Need… more… alcohol…
September 23, 2011 at 2:00 pm
Eh, I’ve got a friend who does this. He can shoot milk from his tear ducts and, at parties, I’ve seen him blow smoke through them. Makes his eyes sting something awful.
September 23, 2011 at 2:16 pm
Wait, so basically this “artist” ran out of ideas and decided “hey, let’s see if I can shoot paint out of my eyes!” He also doesn’t want people to use his “technique” without crediting him for inventing it. Sorry dude but remember boys shooting milk out of their eyes waaaaay back in the 80s. Are you gonna flip your eyelids inside out and claim you invented that too?
“I’m more impressed with the guy who can shoot paint out of ass/paint with his dick” is a sentence I never thought I’d ever say. Thanks Regretsy!:-D
September 23, 2011 at 2:19 pm
I didn’t find this shocking. Or disturbing. I quit watching from boredom. He is pretty good at it though.
September 23, 2011 at 2:24 pm
Now see, this is something I have absolutely no qualms about. The vomit one, though, still literally gives me nightmares.
September 23, 2011 at 8:18 pm
Yeah, the vomit squicked me more. And tubgirl. And the chicken skin mask, pig head, and other animal parts. I couldn’t finish the pain olympics vid.
The butt/penis/eye painting individuals don’t bother me as much. Meatspin is amusing to me.
Just goes to show how individual we all are!
September 24, 2011 at 8:21 am
Pig head. Thank you for the reminder.
{lowers chin and whispers “piiiiiiiiiiiiig hehhhhhhhhd.”}
September 23, 2011 at 2:46 pm
sign me up for the totally not skeeved out about eye painting. I have to go to the other end of the body to get grossed out. I have a real problem with feet, in fact the picture of that foot yesterdsy with the toe socks on made me go ew and shiver. oh, except for the time on Mythbusters when they were trying to make a candle out of ear wax, I almost barfed watching that.
September 23, 2011 at 3:02 pm
CAN WE ALL JUST AGREE THAT ANYTHING ORIGINATING FROM INSIDE THE BODY IS NOT ART.
No squirting, no puking, no peeing, no placentas – cheese & crackers, ya’ll….I don’t think I can’t deal with these shenanigans anymore.
September 23, 2011 at 3:27 pm
Awww, and the music for the video is Project Gotan, which I really like. Probably the only reason I lasted until he started squirting paint…
September 23, 2011 at 3:31 pm
You ever see that CSI episode where David DeLuise plows blood out of his nose onto the wall? yeah, it’s like that, with added WTF.
September 23, 2011 at 3:50 pm
September 23, 2011 at 4:05 pm
I made it all the way through.
I’m not sure if I’m proud of myself, or ashamed…
September 23, 2011 at 4:10 pm
I’m so pleased that he “improved” his technique. I can’t imagine how horrible it would have been before the upgrade.
September 23, 2011 at 4:21 pm
Eye can’t believe what I’m seeing and iris that eye didn’t know about this. Wonder if he shares his technique & takes pupils?
September 23, 2011 at 5:17 pm
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA *deep breath* AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I have this thing about eyes. Do not want!
September 23, 2011 at 6:55 pm
For the love of God, what is wrong with using a paint brush? Or hands? Or even feet? BUT FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS HOLY, WHY WOULD YOU USE YOUR EYES?
September 23, 2011 at 7:20 pm
I lasted until I didn’t hit play and went directly to the comments, which I haven’t read yet and am now going to do to see how many people did the same as me lol
September 23, 2011 at 10:28 pm
I thought that was the least disturbing of those posts and I actually kinda liked the paintings. I can shoot water out of my eyes but would have never thought to do something like this.
September 23, 2011 at 11:30 pm
I have a faulty tear duct on my left side… When I blow my nose I whistle out of it. I also have a nosebleed problem so umm yeah.
September 25, 2011 at 1:08 am
…Is it totally wrong that I want you to get mugged or something now, to see if you do the lizard thing when startled? >_>
September 24, 2011 at 12:27 am
I’ll just leave this here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X6Mi0Bw75GI&oref
September 24, 2011 at 12:33 am
Here’s a screencap from the above:
Uploaded with ImageShack.us
September 24, 2011 at 10:06 am
Okay, I lasted 2:10 minutes before I could no longer stand this fuckery.
Now I’m waiting for lactation paintings on black velvet to soon appear, then my life will be complete.
September 24, 2011 at 8:14 pm
So, this guy is the Jackson Pollack of eye infections?
I watched the whole thing wanting to know how he made the paint spray like that, and now I’m strangely compelled to try it with some eye drops.
September 25, 2011 at 1:04 am
I can’t wait for someone to inject their face with dye and start popping zits at a canvas.
September 25, 2011 at 1:06 am
Ooh, or they could rub their open wounds on a subway car and then see what awesome colors the pus turns and then paint a canvas with it!
I AM FULL OF SUCH GOOD IDEAS GAIZ.
September 25, 2011 at 6:56 pm
I can do this with my eyes
what you have to do is snort whatever it is you want to come out of it.. then hold your nose an keep your mouth closed an try your hardest to breath out your nose (but keep holding it closed with your fingers) an then you get squirty eyes.. woo!
September 26, 2011 at 7:44 pm
Same here, i’ve been able to blow air and make bubbles out of my eyes since i was a little kid. Video didn’t gross me out at all
October 4, 2011 at 6:38 pm
the wiener painter is actually rather good. creepy, but good.
December 21, 2011 at 8:14 am
I think its cool. ^_^ I’d buy one of his paintings. ‘HE PAINTED THIS WITH HIS TEEEEEEARS’. Heh.