YOUR HORRIBLE GIFS AND BIG LEGAL SERIOUSNESS
We are going through over 500 submissions and should have our favorites picked shortly.
In other news, we received this email:
I find it hard to believe that the person who created this actually wants credit for it, but we’re not going to fuck with a giant eagle who can cry tears of glitter.
So we took four seconds to create our own version, and hope that it’s equally tragically delicious.
NEVER FORGET
UPDATE: A reader sent in the following correspondence with Mr. Crying Eagle Glitter Tears
September 11, 2011 at 6:51 pm
So glad you now have a legal eagle.
September 11, 2011 at 6:53 pm
It’s very regal.
September 11, 2011 at 7:32 pm
Much more so than a beagle.
September 11, 2011 at 7:42 pm
…glued to a Smeagol.
September 11, 2011 at 7:55 pm
and the ass of a Segal.
September 11, 2011 at 7:57 pm
In re: the Smeagol remark — Suessophrenia is a crippling illness. Compulsion. Thing.
September 11, 2011 at 8:28 pm
“Anybody want a peanut?”
September 11, 2011 at 9:46 pm
or a sea gull.
September 13, 2011 at 10:41 pm
@Rowsdower – I think I love you and…I wonder if there’s beer on the sun…
September 11, 2011 at 10:17 pm
I read about it in “Der Spiegel”.
September 11, 2011 at 10:21 pm
@zaphod- yes, yes, i’ve got you on this one. that’s one of my all time favorite movie moments. gratz on you!!
September 11, 2011 at 6:56 pm
that is in the top 5 best comments ever.
September 11, 2011 at 8:17 pm
Agreed.
September 11, 2011 at 6:59 pm
In lawyer-speak, it’s a Leagle.
September 11, 2011 at 7:35 pm
It’s pretty much my favorite animal. It’s bred for it’s powers in butthirt.
September 11, 2011 at 7:36 pm
You mean, in Leaglese?
September 11, 2011 at 8:58 pm
On the Banana Splits, April’s dad was Fleagle
September 11, 2011 at 11:45 pm
Butthurt eased by Kegel.
September 11, 2011 at 6:52 pm
Is the eagle crying over the dead bird he ate for lunch?
September 11, 2011 at 7:56 pm
No one. Absolutely NO ONE cries for the dead bird. Evar.
September 11, 2011 at 8:11 pm
This is SO not true. I sat down to cry for it today, and there I am, all set to tear up, and the fucking thing opened its eyes, shook itself, and FLEW THE FUCK OFF.
September 11, 2011 at 8:14 pm
Did it muscle apart the bars and “VOOM!”?
September 11, 2011 at 9:50 pm
I turn mine into soup so I do cry when I chop the onions.
September 11, 2011 at 11:08 pm
The hippies do. When they’ve finished crying over the spirit of the kale they just ate, of course.
September 12, 2011 at 12:25 am
I found a real dead bird in my front garden yesterday. I didn’t cry over it. I went, aaaaaaaa! And made my husband come out and take it away.
September 12, 2011 at 3:46 pm
No no no, you’re so wrong – the fake hobo groom ALWAYS cries for the dead bird. In fact, that’s all he ever does: spends his entire waking life trolling verges, parking lots and roadsides looking for dead birds to cry over
September 11, 2011 at 6:52 pm
The original posters actually turned my stomach. Mission accomplished!
September 11, 2011 at 6:52 pm
Yours is better because it has a nice lens flare. =D
September 11, 2011 at 6:58 pm
It’s got to be pretty depressing to that guy how quickly he was outdone.
September 11, 2011 at 7:12 pm
…and the fact that, per the website, it took two of them to do it.
September 11, 2011 at 7:17 pm
It’s also better because the tear duct is on the correct side of the eye. Assuming birds have tear ducts.
September 11, 2011 at 7:19 pm
Sorry, should’ve scrolled down to see McDerpinson’s comment. Derp.
September 14, 2011 at 6:21 pm
Da derp!
September 11, 2011 at 7:41 pm
Yes they do and you are that is the correct anatomical position for the tears now although you can only see eagles cry big drippy glittery tears on 9/11.
September 11, 2011 at 8:08 pm
Do birds cry?
September 11, 2011 at 8:16 pm
I thought only doves cried…
September 11, 2011 at 9:11 pm
Prince even has them on tape.
September 11, 2011 at 7:36 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
September 11, 2011 at 8:23 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
September 12, 2011 at 2:20 am
I can’t speak for everyone, but I think you actually got voted down for your depressingly poor command of the English language. Not because of the sentiments you expressed.
September 11, 2011 at 6:53 pm
This new eagle is even more hilarious.
September 11, 2011 at 6:53 pm
What an unpatriotic act of butthurt
September 11, 2011 at 6:53 pm
At least yours is crying out of the correct side of his eyeball.
September 11, 2011 at 6:53 pm
You should have plenty of glitter tear crying eagle gifs now, I know I did at least a couple.
September 11, 2011 at 6:54 pm
I miss the glitter. But it’s not worth *dramatic music* A LEGAL ACTION.
I wonder what kind of action it would be. I hope it’s an interpretive dance.
September 11, 2011 at 7:37 pm
Wouldn’t that make court so much more interesting?
September 11, 2011 at 7:42 pm
I think people would be more willing to do jury duty.
September 11, 2011 at 8:57 pm
I know I would!
September 11, 2011 at 7:44 pm
“Your honor, I move to dismiss. The Prosecution’s use of ‘The Shuffle’ fails to convey the gravity of these charges.”
September 16, 2011 at 3:15 am
You know you’ve lost your case when the defense starts crowdsurfing on the jury.
September 11, 2011 at 9:54 pm
If I have to see some judges that I know gyrating around the courtroom in a black leotard, I will need to jumping off the roof of the courthouse because I could not live with the mental image.
September 11, 2011 at 8:26 pm
We could add more leagle posturing and use the Law and Order™ sound…
September 11, 2011 at 9:04 pm
The company I used to work for came up with a gavel that plays that sound when you hit something… I think it’s still for sale over at NBC.
September 11, 2011 at 9:56 pm
Really? If it is, I’m buying it! Wait until the next Moot Court!
September 12, 2011 at 12:17 pm
Ah, I think I can answer that. In response to an Email I sent asking about cost of using his image commercially (see below)
Dear Mr Waldron,
What would it cost to use your image for my new line of toilet paper?
I’d like to give people the opportunity to wipe their arses with it,
and I know I’d have lots of customers.
Regards,
Skiver
….I received the following reply.
A comment that I would expect from a low life thief trading on the
works of
others.
Now, here’s what I can do for you. I can contact Microsoft, who owns
Hotmail, and obtain your name and address and any other information
legal
counsel needs to locate you.
I can have Hotmail permanently bar you from using any Hotmail account.
I can also have the local FBI office obtain a warrant and search
your home
for anything bearing the image of the Crying Eagle.
Care to test it?
September 12, 2011 at 12:31 pm
I’ve Emailed him Postmenopause’s link to the image
http://www.a2zpicturegallery.com/viewfullpicture-11547-Eagle-Face.htm
September 12, 2011 at 6:16 pm
Wait, so he ripped someone else off and is claiming copyright for his crappy manipulation of it? (Of course, that would explain the wonky lines in some of his images.)
I think I love you. I hope the FBI and Hotmail aren’t too rough when they search your body cavities for things bearing the image of the “Crying Eagle.”
September 12, 2011 at 10:52 pm
HA! talk about the derp calling the perp black…he probably stole the twin towers image too.
perhaps you should drop a line to the owner of the original image….
September 12, 2011 at 1:20 pm
Well done Skiver! Nothing gets Hotmail and the FBI more outraged than us talking about toilet paper.
September 12, 2011 at 3:24 pm
…because the integrity of the Crying Eagle is the FBI’s top priority.
September 13, 2011 at 1:19 pm
What a db. And it’s clearly a different eagle on so many levels. Does Mr. Waldron really think he’s the only person in the entire U.S. that photoshopped a teardrop on an eagle, or any other symbol of patriotism, freedom, whatever?
Plus google image eagle, and you’ll see the exact same image (not Waldron’s) displayed everywhere.
Get a grip, Waldron. You’re in the same mental territory as the nutjobs on Hoarders.
September 13, 2011 at 3:26 pm
He has no idea how tempted I am to set up a Hotmail account.
And, somehow, I doubt there’s a “local FBI office” anywhere around here LOL
September 13, 2011 at 10:04 pm
To the best of my knowledge, so long as you don’t make a profit off his lame eagle, you can make a line of special tp to give away. Might be worth a fundraiser
Also, hubby works for Microsoft and disapproves of Hotmail threatenings.
September 12, 2011 at 6:44 pm
I think when these matters pertain to giant glitter crying birds, the correct terminology is ‘egal laction’
September 12, 2011 at 6:46 pm
that was in relply to Maxilu…I dont know why it ended up down here!
September 11, 2011 at 6:55 pm
He can team up with Sly’s mum, Buddy Cop flick style. He can be the understanding, calm good cop and she can be the batshit insane ass reader.
September 11, 2011 at 7:02 pm
Maybe I’ll finish that bottle of rum and start the first draft of “Stop or Sly’s Mom Will File.”
Who the hell am I kidding, no one edits screenplays anymore, it’ll be final copy.
September 11, 2011 at 6:57 pm
I like how the original artist has an overinflated sense of self worth.
The best part is his complete lack of knowledge of copyright law, which allows for parody and satire.
Also, it looks as though he has filed what is known as the “poor mans copyright” which has extremely limited legal standing, and is pretty f-ing easy to overturn in court.
He ought to feel complimented.
yes, I’m grumpy today – some asshat hacked my New York based clients webserver on 9/11 for laughs.
I hate people today.
September 11, 2011 at 7:04 pm
But he wrote it all in RED, so that must make it seriously serious!
September 11, 2011 at 7:06 pm
AND it’s on a black background, so you know he knows what he’s talking about.
September 11, 2011 at 7:08 pm
…plus the official BADGE he clearly didn’t Photoshop himself.
September 12, 2011 at 2:30 am
He did slip up in one respect though; he forgot to pluralize “internet” to “
internets“. That’s how you know it’s not official.September 11, 2011 at 10:04 pm
Oh, that tin star is sooo cuuute. He must feel like such a big boy.
September 14, 2011 at 10:02 am
Careful now… you might get back-traced by his cyber squad.
September 11, 2011 at 7:27 pm
Never mind the parody and satire clause – are you trying to tell me that this copy-paste bastard can handle a camera well enough to have taken the photographs he’s half-assedly stitched together?
Pshaww. I hate people, too.
September 11, 2011 at 7:54 pm
So stealing photos to repurpose/recontextualize them is perfectly ok, but only when HE’S doing it.
Hypocrites like this are always the fastest to cry copyright when anyone so much as sneezes at their precious Photoshopped wonders.
September 11, 2011 at 8:43 pm
A million thumbs up to both of you!
September 12, 2011 at 12:00 am
The eagle is not his image.
http://www.a2zpicturegallery.com/viewfullpicture-11547-Eagle-Face.htm
(I will be overdoing this, I promise. I HATE copyright violators who accuse others of copyright violation.)
September 11, 2011 at 7:38 pm
i hate people every day, so welcome to this everlovin club o’ joy.
not all people, mind you, but definitely all days.
September 11, 2011 at 8:30 pm
We’re equal opportunity… we hate everyone.
September 11, 2011 at 10:07 pm
It’s all the damn federal safety regulations. It’s messing with natural selection and people who should have died young survive.
September 12, 2011 at 12:02 am
That is such a bitter, messed-up attitude. And I’m glad I’m not the only one who feels that way.
September 17, 2011 at 1:31 pm
I’m hoping that with all the “anti-vaccination activism” the problem will take care of itself.
September 14, 2011 at 9:27 am
Equal Opportunity Bigot membership holder right here. We have a seekrit handshake and club jackets;)
September 16, 2011 at 3:19 am
Is the secret handshake just a backhand to the face?
September 11, 2011 at 10:01 pm
They can be loathsome. I’m less annoyed at his limited knowledge of the law then at his incredibly boring letter – no fun at all.
September 11, 2011 at 6:58 pm
The substitute does not offer enough sparkling glitter in the tear. Without sparkling glitter, I might…just…FORGET!!
September 11, 2011 at 9:14 pm
Blingee has a glittering tear with 3 wolves in it.
September 11, 2011 at 6:58 pm
You knew someone was going to have butthurtitis today.
September 11, 2011 at 7:24 pm
I find patriotism and butthurt go hand in hand. Or hands-in-ass.
Yup. A big, gaping red white & blue goatse hole of patriotic butthurt.
September 11, 2011 at 6:58 pm
Bald eagles don’t cry. Toby Keith will put a boot in your ass if you even suggest we’d choose a patriotic symbol capable of tears.
My brain is also spinning to work out how this is related:
http://theoatmeal.com/blog/beverage_options
9/11 was planned by Canadians? Ginger ale is the wimpiest of ales? I don’t know. I’m not drunk enough.
September 11, 2011 at 7:00 pm
And of course I mean no disrespect to you, Princess Buzzkill Crying Glitter Eagle.
September 11, 2011 at 7:41 pm
Nah, it wasn’t us… we were all too busy pounding back REAL beer and munching on brownies to have ever come up with that one.
September 11, 2011 at 6:58 pm
The contest thread is full, so I’ll post my eagle-less bling here,just so it won’t go to waste.
Hey, people weren’t the only victims of 9-11…
birds pictures
(Intentional typo, natch.)
September 11, 2011 at 6:59 pm
Internet- serious Business!!
September 11, 2011 at 7:02 pm
I like that the time it took to throw together his copyright disclaimer probably took significantly more effort than the original glitter eagle.
September 11, 2011 at 9:15 pm
Wouldn’t surprise me if that was copy/pasted too.
September 11, 2011 at 7:03 pm
I have been waiting for this moment all weekend! I’m still pissed that Photobucket and Blingee deleted my entry
I was only using gay porn to show the love.
September 11, 2011 at 7:29 pm
And it was so tastefully done!
September 11, 2011 at 7:39 pm
Is there any way you could get it back to show us? I really want to see.
September 11, 2011 at 7:43 pm
OK, this is only going to be viewable for like 10 minutes before Photobucket find it again :
They’re going to start suing me in a minute.
You’re good – I’m hosting it now. – HK
September 11, 2011 at 8:06 pm
April FTW again! And could someone please remove those towers…. yummy!
September 11, 2011 at 8:07 pm
Never before have I found the World Trade Center so arousing.
September 11, 2011 at 8:07 pm
This is amazing, no doubt about it.
September 11, 2011 at 8:21 pm
Yay April to the rescue! This was one of my top five favorite entries.
September 11, 2011 at 8:58 pm
Zithreal, you’re beautiful and I love you. I never fully appreciated the gravity of 9/11 until this moment.
September 11, 2011 at 9:06 pm
I love you too, zithreal. *saves gif to ard drive*
September 11, 2011 at 9:07 pm
Goddamn iPad. *hard* drive.
September 14, 2011 at 9:29 am
The hearts ejaculate is the best partXD
September 11, 2011 at 9:21 pm
Try tinypic. They’ve never deleted any of the depraved shit I’ve posted.
September 11, 2011 at 7:03 pm
He’s a “MEMBER OF THE ALLIANCE for the PROTECTION of INTERNET COPYRIGHTS.” Sounds legit!
September 11, 2011 at 7:05 pm
Dude! *points* They have a BADGE!!!!! A BADGE!!!!
September 11, 2011 at 7:10 pm
They’re APIC!!!
September 11, 2011 at 7:21 pm
…………………..^ monkey balls
(why hello, I’m feeling mature today)
September 11, 2011 at 7:40 pm
That reminds me – I need to put away the kiwi fruits I just bought.
September 12, 2011 at 12:06 am
I stole that. I collect funny monkey pics. I don’t do anything with them, just collect them…and look at them…on dark, rainy days…
September 11, 2011 at 10:08 pm
Don’t they all meet at the Justice League or some such place?
September 12, 2011 at 5:52 am
The Justice league would never accept them as members…
September 11, 2011 at 7:04 pm
you correctly identified where and eagle’s tear duct would be. the other asshole royally fucked that up. the terrorists lose.
September 11, 2011 at 8:36 pm
*AN. fuck, i suck.
September 11, 2011 at 7:06 pm
When we start suing each other over bald eagle bullshit, the terrorists and Glen Frey win!
September 11, 2011 at 8:33 pm
Educate me on how Glen Frey win… OH! Nevermind.
September 11, 2011 at 7:06 pm
I actually think the new one is better, artistically speaking.
But yeah, needs more glitter
September 11, 2011 at 7:06 pm
This contest has also raised the question of “Do eagles have tear ducts” the internet is telling me yes and no. HALF THE INTERNET IF LYING TO ME.
September 11, 2011 at 8:35 pm
The tear is a lie.
September 11, 2011 at 7:06 pm
He recently had his ass read and Ms. Stallone told him:
“Your glitter eagle is being ripped off form the same woman whom was making fun of my ass-reading abilities. You should definitely threaten faux legal action. That will show her!!
Also, you need to wipe better.”
September 11, 2011 at 7:08 pm
I am puzzled by the alternate image on his website that looks like someone is attempting to give the eagle a partial lobotomy with a pointy flagpole. It makes me wonder about the true source of the tears.
September 11, 2011 at 7:10 pm
I want to see the Flounces. I know there must’ve been some.
September 11, 2011 at 7:11 pm
Wait til she unveils the “winning” GIFs & it’ll be flounce-a-rific!!!
September 11, 2011 at 7:22 pm
I’m totally* going to flounce if I don’t win.
*I’m lying. There were lots of entries better than mine.
September 11, 2011 at 7:11 pm
I like how his beak creates a sunbeam, hahahah
I was going to ask if you tried to explain to him how the whole “copyright-on-the-internet” thing works, but then I realized you probably didn’t want to waste your energy. If that fucktard really wants that silly image, then he can have it, blah
September 11, 2011 at 7:17 pm
The beak/sunbeam effect comes from the “pure American spirit” that the bald eagle represents….even though we hunted the bald eagle into near extinction…but we as Americans tend to file that little fact away and just put shitty glittery tears onto the eagles’ face and slap some crappy 9/11 reference on it….kinda like how we forget about what we did to the Native Americans…
September 11, 2011 at 8:36 pm
Aka ‘Patriotic snot beams’ from extended crying.
September 11, 2011 at 7:11 pm
Needs more glitter.
September 11, 2011 at 7:13 pm
I’m pretty sure the original crying eagle with glitter tear was made by Francis Scott Key shortly before he wrote the national anthem…pretty sure
September 11, 2011 at 7:42 pm
He only wrote the lyrics. The melody he stole from an English drinking song.
September 11, 2011 at 7:14 pm
September 11, 2011 at 7:30 pm
oh yes, just what I want, a poster with the image of burning buildings on it. WARNING WILL ROBINSON!! Here comes my rant.
I am soooo tired of seeing so many of my facebook friends post pics of the buildings burning. STOP IT!! I want to remember them as they were, beautiful and sparkly (didn’t need Blingee) just as it got dark on a cold winter’s evening because here in NYC, it gets dark a 4pm and everyone was still at work. I want to remember them alive with people going about their business (as crooked as that may have been) and planning what to get the kids for X-mas that year, the GI Joe with the kung-fu grip. OK, done, and thanks for listening. cf4l
September 11, 2011 at 7:49 pm
September 11, 2011 at 8:52 pm
Yes. Thank you.
September 12, 2011 at 5:54 am
not enough thumbs up
September 11, 2011 at 7:58 pm
Ya know, that kinda needed to be said.
Every serious “tribute” I’ve seen lately — so nothing on Regretsy, which is where I’m coming for a much-needed break — seems to commemorate the act of the attack itself, and not what was actually lost.
September 11, 2011 at 8:50 pm
thank you
September 11, 2011 at 10:10 pm
I’m old enough to remember before the towers – kind of of a weird circle.
September 12, 2011 at 12:11 am
YES, YES, YES!!!! Thank you, HelloKnitty, for voicing what I’ve been wrestling with all day.
Man, the leftover terrorists must be snickering themselves silly in their caves at how “unaffected” Americans were by the attacks.
September 12, 2011 at 1:58 am
ok, all of this started to get to me so I went for a walk, saw a lot of police on the street. I thought this was a good thing, increased police presence and all that. then I saw that they were all around some stuff on the ground. it was white and powdery. Dang it, now I am convinced I have been exposed to anthranx so I just went to Rudy’s and got really drunk to kill the germs. i am really wasted right now so excuse this post
September 12, 2011 at 2:50 am
I think you’ll be OK. More likely, someone dropped their donut.
September 16, 2011 at 3:24 am
A cop dropped a donut? NEVER FORGET.
September 12, 2011 at 5:31 pm
so nobody got the “Trading Places” reference?
September 11, 2011 at 7:15 pm
Damn, Helen, did you not read the directions on his website? They were very clear. You were to “REQUEST WRITTEN PERMISSION FOR USE OF IMAGE AS PERSCRIBED BY LAW.” And don’t forget, “IF IT’S USE GENERATES ANY COMMERCIAL PROFIT, 90% OF THAT PROFIT
MUST GO TO VICTIMS FAMILIES RELIEF FUNDS.
PLEASE KEEP THAT IN MIND IF ASKING FOR PERMISSION.”
I hope you didn’t profit off his sad, sad eagle, because you’re going to have to share that money with
him“victims families relief funds”.September 16, 2011 at 3:25 am
There aren’t enough thumbs in the world. Or [sic]s.
September 11, 2011 at 7:15 pm
If any site ever deserved to be categorized as parody for purposes of First Amendment protection, this is it. And if anything ever deserved treatment as parody, it’s that eagle. Go forth and continue to do that voodoo that you do so well.
September 11, 2011 at 7:15 pm
I think what we really must ask is did Crying Eagle give permission to use his likeness? After all, he is the face of ‘never forgetting.’ He should demand restitution.
September 11, 2011 at 7:37 pm
Crying Eagle, that was the guy in danceswithwolves right?
September 11, 2011 at 8:09 pm
No that was the dude in the “don’t litter” PSA.
September 11, 2011 at 7:16 pm
You’re a bunch of sick bastards…I sure do love it here!
September 12, 2011 at 8:38 am
Shit. I hit the wrong button.
September 11, 2011 at 7:17 pm
You don’t understand. He has the copyright to the IDEA, because no one EVER would have thought of it. It’s so BOLD and ORIGINAL.
There needs to be a sarcasm font. I feel like I’m yelling.
September 11, 2011 at 7:23 pm
Use the irony mark– ¿insert sarcasm here¿
September 11, 2011 at 7:24 pm
I think that’s even better than actually doing the character right!
September 12, 2011 at 5:29 am
LOL, it IS better this way!
(you forgot the semicolon)
September 11, 2011 at 7:43 pm
You could just use the Harry Potter font, in an ironic way.
September 11, 2011 at 7:17 pm
Original? His chit’s made of stock images, and *everyone* with a pirate copy PSP was making crying eagles ffs.
What ev. Rancid overblown douchecanoe.
September 11, 2011 at 9:12 pm
I’ve been here too long. I read that as “his clit’s”
September 11, 2011 at 9:24 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
September 11, 2011 at 7:18 pm
Totally drunk right now, can’t tell your eagle from his, who gives a fuck. But I wish you had not given in to his terrorist demands to make the change.
September 11, 2011 at 7:21 pm
Bald eagles are like the Chuck Norris of the bird world. They don’t cry. They leave a giant bald eagle shit on those who piss them off, and the shit is in the shape of the United States and it burns like acid.
September 11, 2011 at 7:36 pm
Love this. Preach it, sister!
September 11, 2011 at 8:40 pm
I had better see a gif with sparkly poo emanating from one of those eagles… You’ve generated the demand now.
September 12, 2011 at 12:16 am
In Alaska, bald eagles survive by dumpster-diving.
September 16, 2011 at 3:27 am
That’s pretty fucking American!
September 11, 2011 at 7:23 pm
I’m not sure if I should feel as pleased as I do, but apparently, my criticism caused the cupcake who posted the godawful Titanic/911 fanfic on Fanfiction.net to take it down. She even sent me a personal note telling me that I’d raped her dreams (well, not actually raped her dreams, but destroyed her lovely bubble of stupidity in which Jack and Rose get to die in 9/11 and go to Heaven, where they have a baby).
September 11, 2011 at 7:28 pm
You are doing good work in the world.
September 11, 2011 at 7:28 pm
Shit. I would have liked to read that one with a nice bottle of wine at hand and celene dion blasting on the stereo. Now I can’t, you awful raper of dreams.
September 11, 2011 at 7:30 pm
Please please ppllleeaassee show us her obviously not overblown indignation.
September 11, 2011 at 10:39 pm
I think I saved it, but I’m not sure-I’ll have to check my misc. file.
September 11, 2011 at 7:31 pm
I’m not sure if I’m proud of you or kind of miffed that I can now never read the utter fuckery that it no doubt was.
September 11, 2011 at 7:32 pm
I hope you saved a copy for us.
September 11, 2011 at 7:33 pm
Ooo, is it an amazing vampire baby like Edward and Bella’s, that has to be chewed out of her so she won’t die ’cause it’s all big and ravenous and…? (Or something like that…confess I never read any of the books!) Or…oh, wait, they’re already dead. And in heaven. Huh…how’s that work?
September 11, 2011 at 7:36 pm
…wait, now I’m curious. And intrigued. And craving bubbly.
September 11, 2011 at 7:37 pm
We need to crochet, bake, knit, weave, embroider, solder, stitch and glitterize you some kind of purple heart goatse medal of fuckery.
I read that piece of gunk – you did the world a service.
September 11, 2011 at 7:44 pm
Yeah, what made it especially disturbing (besides that it was poorly written) was that the author used at least one name of a real victim!
September 11, 2011 at 8:11 pm
Aw, I wish you’d linked to that before you made her FFnet!flounce. That sounds like gold.
September 11, 2011 at 8:16 pm
I’ve read some horrible fanfic for the lulz. I have never wished Fanfiction.net didn’t block the Way Back Machine more than in this moment. Titanic/911 fanfic sounds like a panel at a poorly conceived geek convention.
September 12, 2011 at 12:55 pm
“For in the resurrection they neither marry, nor are given in marriage, but are as the angels of God in heaven.”–but apparently prior to the resurrection, you can have babies in heaven.
Why am I arguing the theology of a religion I don’t practice with a lunatic on the Internet again?
September 12, 2011 at 2:21 pm
I’m pretty sure you’ve single-handedly raised the average IQ of the internet by getting that removed. I salute you.
September 13, 2011 at 11:04 am
I am forever sad that I will not be able to read this fic. Was it, by chance, by andrewsirishgirl and titled United We Stand? (Of COURSE I went and googled it immediately.) She has an awesome note about said fic on her profile:
http://www.fanfiction.net/u/3228581/andrewsirishgirl
September 11, 2011 at 7:25 pm
so…how does he have a copyright from 1999 for 9/11 art? Is he part of the conspiracy?
September 11, 2011 at 7:45 pm
“When this bald eagle hits 88 mph you’re gonna see some serious shit.” -Doc Brown
September 11, 2011 at 7:54 pm
I see what you did there
September 12, 2011 at 5:58 am
you noticed that too?
September 11, 2011 at 7:27 pm
Sorry, but when your legal disclaimer has spelling and grammar errors, it tends to lose a bit of cred.
September 11, 2011 at 9:47 pm
Hey! You stole that image!
September 11, 2011 at 7:28 pm
PERMISSION MAY BE OBTAINED FOR COMMERCIAL USE ONLY AFTER A “LICENSE”
FOR REDISTRIBUTION OR REPRODUCTION OF THIS IMAGE,
OR ANY PART OF THIS IMAGE IN “ANY” FORM MUST BE OBTAINED FROM THE CREATORS.
AS STIPULATED BY THE LIBRARY OF CONGRESS “COPYRIGHTS DEPARTMENT”
Apparently this guy has never been over to unnecessaryquotes.com.
I would interpret it this way – you don’t really need an actual license (just something that kind of RESEMBLES one), there’s at least one form you can use this in (not just “any” old form, though), and this “Copyrights Department” is probably a couple of law students hanging out in a basement somewhere composing strongly worded emails that they pulled out of their well-read asses.
September 12, 2011 at 6:01 am
Can I play Mr. Obvious for a moment?
Our “friend” (Mr. Dennis Waldron) is so CLUE-FREE he seems to be unaware of where you actually obtain copyrights.
Its not the LOC, asshat.
September 14, 2011 at 9:24 am
OK – I’ll bite. where else can you obtain a copyright registration other than the U.S. Copyright Office (LOC)?
September 11, 2011 at 7:29 pm
I reckon you would have been fine to keep using it, as use of copyrighted works which have been adapted for satirical or commentary purposes are considered fair use.
#obnoxiouslawstudentinthehouse
September 11, 2011 at 7:48 pm
September 11, 2011 at 7:31 pm
It’s all good. Every time Regretsy gets hit with a crease and desist, an angel gets it’s wings…..
September 11, 2011 at 7:51 pm
Not where you’d think they’d be though.
September 12, 2011 at 6:02 am
a goatse with winged adornment, perhaps?
September 11, 2011 at 10:14 pm
I thought it was a devil get horny…oops, I mean its horns.
September 11, 2011 at 7:34 pm
I AM ON THE EDGE OF MY FRIGGIN’ SEAT HERE HELEN – NAME THE WINNERS ALREADY!!! … My twin towers are gonna fall over with all this waiting in anticipation….
September 11, 2011 at 8:03 pm
I’ll bet it’s a very scientific process that goes something like this:
- HK and Broc pour shots
- HK and Bronc drink shots
- HK sets up viewing station so the dogs can evaluate the .gifs. The one that induces the most frenetic barking wins.
- HK consults the General Akbar Oracle to confirm if it is a trap or not.
- HK posts winners.
You can’t argue with a solid decision making process.
September 11, 2011 at 8:24 pm
So how long have you been stalking them, eh?
September 11, 2011 at 8:54 pm
Umm, errr…….well…… Oh, hey, look over there! (quietly moves away from the window).
September 11, 2011 at 7:36 pm
Someone REALLY likes eagle tears.
September 11, 2011 at 8:44 pm
Thank you… I’m apparently not the only one who thought that eagle tear was a little too opaque.
September 11, 2011 at 7:38 pm
Did Mr. Waldron get permission from that eagle to use its likeness? And how does it feel about being represented as a big crybaby?
September 11, 2011 at 7:40 pm
I’d not be overly surprised if Mister Douchecanoe tried to say that April’s eagle is “too similar” to his, and would therefore probably cause “brand confusion and dilution”. Even though, let’s be perfectly honest, he did not painstakingly train a bald eagle to cry glittery tears, choosing instead to just copy someone else’s photos and slap them together with a 70% opacity fade and a variety of overworked (yes, even on 9/11) trite neo-patriotic buzz words.
Let me pop some popcorn and settle back for ‘Butthurt: Back for Seconds’.
September 11, 2011 at 7:46 pm
Shhhh! Don’t give him any ideas!
On second thought, give him ideas so we can make fun of him again. =D
September 11, 2011 at 7:46 pm
The sequel highly lauded as “Better than the Original!”
September 12, 2011 at 6:04 am
Butthurt 2: Bring the Pepto, its gonna be a long night
September 11, 2011 at 7:49 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
September 11, 2011 at 7:50 pm
Silly people, his is not an eagle. It’s the crying patriotic Skeksis.
September 12, 2011 at 5:56 am
Nice DC reference
September 11, 2011 at 7:54 pm
This is by no means an entry to the contest, but I am anticipating a number of flounces related to the contest and all of the other 9/11 Fuckery, so:
September 11, 2011 at 8:45 pm
Quite seizure inducing… and I’m not epileptic.
September 11, 2011 at 9:35 pm
Why, thank you. I think.
I think one of the tags I gave this during its creation was “seizure”… or maybe it was “goatse”, I can’t really remember at this point.
September 11, 2011 at 7:56 pm
amazing how much his image looks like this one
(minus the tears and towers) – which seems to have no individual copyright or credit to use on it, although it seems to belong to a Native American site.
September 11, 2011 at 8:04 pm
wow, nothing like ripping off the Natives Americans, snerk, that’s NEVER been done before
September 11, 2011 at 9:08 pm
Just give them a box of paddle balles and they’ll be fine.
September 11, 2011 at 9:00 pm
someone should also tell old Dennis that the same picture he’s claiming you need to ask permission to use is also available at a2zPictureGallery
or maybe just let him do a search… for similar and see how many are out there.
..some even with towers in them!
September 11, 2011 at 8:15 pm
Yeah, he’s the first guy to come up with a crying eagle. If you don’t include the Charlotte Observer cartoon for the Challenger explosion that Doug Marlette created in 1986. I see no similarities here at all.
September 11, 2011 at 8:46 pm
That’s completely different. This eagle is facing in the other direction!
September 11, 2011 at 8:23 pm
How dare you mock the carefully crafted (poorly shopped) art (stolen low res photos) that this artist (buttmunch thief) is offering to commemorate (desperate, talent less money grab) this occasion?
How DARE you mock the mess created from the stolen work of others?? I particularly like the printer lines in the eagle’s head – very classy.
September 11, 2011 at 8:31 pm
It could be because I was watching Chevy Chase movies this morning, but I totally read that in the style of his old subliminal message guy bit.
His funniest bit since the infamous job interview sketch with Richard Pryor.
You may have made my night.
September 13, 2011 at 10:46 pm
Awesome! Someday, I’ll tell the story of how I own Chevy Chase’s mattress.
September 11, 2011 at 8:23 pm
Speaking of native traditions being ripped off….According to some lady that blew into my chest and told me my power animal was a wild turkey at some new age festival, the wild turkey was actually supposed to be our national bird origiinally. The question is, would the butthurt be more or less with a crying turkey? Would copyright owners still have the same issues had 9/11 been remembered as “Gobble gobble (glitter tears) gobble gobble?”
September 12, 2011 at 1:00 pm
I believe, IIRC (and if 1776 is to be believed as a primary resource), that Benjamin Franklin did argue for the turkey. He liked the idea of a distinctively New World bird instead of the eagle with all its Roman, European, empire-building associations.
He lost, which is kind of a pity. I like our bald eagle, but the turkey would have been fun.
September 11, 2011 at 8:29 pm
You know, that eagle looks awfully familiar..
http://www.firstpeople.us/pictures/eagles/800×600/Eagle-800×600.html
“Images are not allowed for commercial use, or uploaded to file sharing sites like Flickr, Imageshack, Photonet, Photobucket, Picturesdepot, Shareapic etc.” (from the firstpeople.us site)
Nothing warms my heart like a hypocrite getting all butthurt.
BUT WAIT- there’s more!
Hand holding flag:
http://www.rescue14.com/graphics/smflaginhand.jpg
Towers burning:
http://d3dodnw77jlz6m.cloudfront.net/wp-content/files/2011/08/Twin-Towers-Burning.jpg
I’m not sure if the above websites own the images, but I’m sure Mr. Dennis E. Waldron doesn’t.
September 12, 2011 at 12:41 am
Good sleuthing!
September 12, 2011 at 7:37 pm
Thanks, although it wasn’t hard or anything. They were all in the first couple pages on google images for their respective searches…
September 14, 2011 at 10:11 am
Oh boy, it looks like he’s aspiring to be the next Shepard Fairey:
http://www.boston.com/bostonglobe/editorial_opinion/outofline/2009/02/fairey_obey_my_lawyers_1.html
September 11, 2011 at 8:30 pm
(originally)…forgive me…just got done w a turkey pastrami sandwich. It was delicious AND it didn’t sue me!
September 11, 2011 at 8:36 pm
Screw the eagle!
I think this bird serves the purpose much better.
September 11, 2011 at 8:59 pm
Throw in a turkey and Ben Franklin would be proud.
September 11, 2011 at 9:40 pm
Did I do this right? Is Ben Franklin proud of me yet?
September 12, 2011 at 12:43 am
I now have a “We all live in a turkey submarine…a turkey submarine…a turkey submarine…” earworm.
September 11, 2011 at 10:17 pm
Silly, that’ the lawyer’s bird.
September 11, 2011 at 11:38 pm
Dennis Waldron is a turd. ©2011
September 11, 2011 at 11:56 pm
He didn’t credit the original photographer…
http://www.a2zpicturegallery.com/viewfullpicture-11547-Eagle-Face.htm
September 12, 2011 at 2:06 pm
Neither did A2Z
I’ve searched around a little bit and I wasn’t able to find the name of the original photographer. Are we sure that the original photog ISN’T one of those two guys and that they are the ones who shared it around before the crying-glitter-eagle image was created?
If this is the case, that one of those two guys is the original photog, then he owns the image, copyright and all, even with a “poor-man’s copyright”, as the creator of the original image.
Not that this information makes this whole C&D thing any better, just that everyone seems to be saying that he stole that eagle, but no one has come up with the original photographer’s name, so how do we know that?
The rest is definitely stolen from another photog(s) though.
September 12, 2011 at 2:53 pm
Even though it looks like he photoshopped a bunch of stock photos together, it’s not under “poor man’s copyright” ’cause he actually registered the sad eagle at Library of Congress as: “America Cries.” Yikes.
September 12, 2011 at 3:19 pm
Yeah, it only costs $30 to get a legal copyright for an image through LoC.
But, even though he has a copyright on that combination of images, if he doesn’t own the original images and didn’t get permission to use them, he is still in violation of copyright. But we still don’t know for sure if he or the other guy is the original photographer or if they simply obtained the images from their being released as stock photos and free to use.
September 12, 2011 at 4:18 am
Please put a monocle on that bird! It’s just begging for it.
September 12, 2011 at 10:23 am
I find it utterly hilarious and ironic, that someone who ripped off someone ELSE, is claiming that REgretsy ripped them off, even though the images are similar but not the same, so no ripping off has actually occured on REgresty of the ripoff ‘artist’s’ ripped off work.
You get that? }:P
September 12, 2011 at 6:22 pm
I’ve been lurking around here for a few weeks and this is my first time commenting.
This little gem should be pointed out to dear Mr. Waldron:
http://tattoo.about.com/od/tatart/ig/9-11-and-American-Pride-Tats/9-11-Crying-Eagle-Tattoo.htm
The tattoo artist didn’t even include full artist credit and copyright symbol under the image!
September 12, 2011 at 6:59 pm
And don’t forget, his copyright is handled by the FDNY legal department
http://www.slate.com/blogs/weigel/2011/09/09/remembering_the_kitsch_of_9_11.html
September 12, 2011 at 9:14 pm
I wonder if Mr. Glittertears took the photo of that eagle himself or found it on Google Images and added to it. If so, it is you sir who have violated copyright law NOT Regretsy. Parody and satire are protected where your emotionally manipulative digital imagery is not.
September 13, 2011 at 1:49 pm
What you said.
September 13, 2011 at 7:41 am
jesus christ i had to make a blingee for this shit
September 13, 2011 at 7:54 am
September 13, 2011 at 8:45 am
Sorry, I dont know how to load pictures but follow this link: http://tattoo.about.com/cs/tatart/l/blgal911.htm
Did the “artist” of crying eagle see that tattoo? How do you sue skin?
September 13, 2011 at 1:23 pm
I’m guessing this means he also owns the original photo he took of this amazing eagle, right? Oh wait, it’s a stock photo?
So he wants to sue using someone else’s shit?
September 14, 2011 at 12:59 am
I can’t believe I just noticed this….
The tear, it looks a lot like jizz.
Someone REALLY likes crying eagles
September 14, 2011 at 8:33 am
I CAN HAZ HISSY FIT!
*Wah-mbulance!*
September 17, 2011 at 6:09 am
Actually, I say let’s test it. Because in fact, she was asking permission to use the image, and thus is a low-life respecter of copyright, not a low-life thief. For the same reason, she cannot be blocked from hotmail, nor could the FBI obtain a warrant against her.
September 17, 2011 at 8:39 am
****** I WOULD ****SO VERY MUCH ALL THE TIME ****** PURCHASE TOILET PAPER WITH CRYING EAGLES ON IT** FOR REAL MONEY *
September 18, 2011 at 10:22 pm
I’m new to Regretsy, but find this particular discussion fascinating, so I had to add my thoughts. A quick Google search turned up no such Alliance for the Protection of Internet Copyrights. In fact, if you search the term in quotation marks, the only pages it turns up are “America Cries” and this Regretsy thread.
I think this should be tested. It would be quite easy to show that he has ignored copyright on the original images he’s slapped together to create his image.
September 18, 2011 at 11:22 pm
It’s pretty clear the guy’s talking out his ass. Maybe he’s actually been able to intimidate other people, but it’s not going to happen this time.
September 26, 2011 at 4:11 pm
WTF is all I have to say. I was on a group learning to use photoshop in 2001. The night of 9/11, I took a freaking Eagle and with the help of others (explaining how to do it – damn thing never did make sense) we made that EXACT FREAKING PIC!! We then put it up on free sites for people to use for FREE. I have had it as one of my pics on social sites I’ve been on since. I’d LOVE to know when this moron can claim something is his when I know for a freaking fact that me and several other people in that Yahoo Group worked on the dang thing the night of 9/11. And they were all WOMEN. He’s the biggest douche I know of. And the copyrite on his page is 1999 – I’d like him to prove he made that in ’99. Keep on doing whatcha do best Hellen – Read you ever single day.
September 26, 2011 at 4:13 pm
And it was so ugly, I stopped using photoshop and gave up. LOL I could never figure it out right. But this made me mad that some idiot is claiming a freaking jpeg as his own. My God. Heck, I even took the pic of the eagle from a photo I found through a free clip art group. Argh