Secret things are happening
If you have been following the Members Only posts, you know that we are moving our little clubhouse off of the main site. You will no longer see protected posts here.
To to the untrained eye, it will look like nothing secret is going on, and other people are not, in fact, having more fun than you are. You will also not be able to smell the alcohol from there, and there will be no more tearful, aborted handjobs in the back seat.
Well no, that might still happen. I can’t watch everyone, I have things to do.
I’ll be posting a link tonight on Facebook and Twitter so you can find the new location. And that’s when shit will get real.
In the meantime…
August 17, 2011 at 7:15 pm
The suspense is killing me! Mostly because I have nothing else to do with my life, and I ran out of gin 12 minutes ago.
August 17, 2011 at 7:47 pm
OUT OF GIN!! How can you calmly type? CALL 911!!
August 17, 2011 at 7:48 pm
Running out of gin is unacceptable behavior, always keep a spare hidden in the back of the freezer.
ALWAYS.
August 17, 2011 at 8:43 pm
Or in the toilet tank.
August 18, 2011 at 9:21 am
AND in the toilet tank!
What’s this “OR in the toilet tank”? That’s just silly talk!
August 17, 2011 at 8:14 pm
Gin tastes like Hospital. I go straight for the vodka, which tastes like Death.
August 17, 2011 at 8:27 pm
and Scotch tastes like rubber bands.
August 17, 2011 at 8:39 pm
i agree with both the previous responses
August 18, 2011 at 2:18 am
and Campari tastes like ear wax… but I wouldn’t because I’ve tried neither of them. And nobody drinks Campari these days anyway. Cin cin!
August 18, 2011 at 3:38 pm
What shit do you guys drink? Scotch is heaven. Just what kind of people are you? I thought you were bitchy, evil, visit with the devil, fat, untalented loser lushes who liked penis and vagina “art.” Now I discover that you are gin & scotch hating deviants. I may have to flounce.
August 17, 2011 at 8:50 pm
The internet has given me new insight to my life. My boyfriend apparently drinks Death on Ice every night, and my darling sweet black cat is really Basement Cat. WTH, people? W…T…H??
August 17, 2011 at 8:54 pm
Vodka is the little black dress of alcohol. It goes with everything. Deliciously.
August 17, 2011 at 9:07 pm
Except root beer. Ran out of mixers one time, and tried an unsuccessful experiment…
August 17, 2011 at 9:17 pm
This is how we learn.
Butterscotch schnapps and root beer is amazeballs.
August 18, 2011 at 12:28 am
@ JohnnyQuest – Actually I like vodka and root beer, although it goes very flat very fast.
You haven’t really run out of mix until you’ve been stuck at your aunt’s in the country and, unwilling to drunkencanoe up the creek to the LC (I wish I were joking), had to settle for rye and all the flavours of koolaid the kids wouldn’t drink.
August 18, 2011 at 8:44 am
Root beer, ice cream and vodka… adult root beer floats, Mommy’s special treat! (It does help to be slightly drunk when you start drinking these…)
August 18, 2011 at 9:24 am
Vanilla vodka and cranberry/pomagranate juice, over ice. About 2 ozs of the vodka to 5 of the juice. I thought if I just poured until “it looks about right” without measuring I’d be on the road to a drinking problem…but if I measured, then it was just recreational drinking, right? Right? Anyone?
August 17, 2011 at 8:56 pm
I’ve always said gin tastes like pine needles. No thank you.
August 17, 2011 at 9:04 pm
OMG! I had a “James T. Kirk is a Ho-bag” and the entire time I drank it, I kept saying, “This drink tastes like pine needles. And then kept drinking to see if it would change.
All that changed is I tried to hump my car instead of my husband… which isn’t really that new. Where am I now?
August 18, 2011 at 3:33 pm
Good gin is juniper & herbs. I’ve never tasted anything from vodka unless it is those silly kid flavored types.
August 17, 2011 at 7:16 pm
okay if that isn’t me it is my double…
August 17, 2011 at 7:16 pm
Hooray!! My husband thinks he will be getting the computer back in a minute so he can watch Hulu. He is wrong.
August 17, 2011 at 7:17 pm
I myself am off to watch Franklin & Bash til its time.
August 17, 2011 at 7:27 pm
arg, it keeps jamming up (on computer). Needs to be on Netflix.
http://www.tnt.tv/dramavision/;jsessionid=CAFFE4F42C73F0B319AACA682A5DA189?cid=99221
August 17, 2011 at 7:17 pm
Does it still count as secret things if you keep telling us about them?
August 17, 2011 at 7:19 pm
YOU’RE RUINING CHRISTMAS
August 17, 2011 at 8:14 pm
Fractaled: I think that Helen understands that many of us here are (A. Problem Drinkers, or (B. Pot Heads. (I try to ride that fine line between the two.) That being said, I think she understands that many of us have a bit of trouble remembering things. Or, as some people call it, short term memory loss. So if she didn’t remind us of these things we would all just wander off and masturbate somewhere.
August 17, 2011 at 8:33 pm
I think she’s just a dirty, dirty tease.
In my world, that’s an admirable quality.
August 17, 2011 at 9:21 pm
Sleaze is what makes the world go ’round.
August 18, 2011 at 11:39 am
HEY! You left out us pill poppers….must be that short term memory loss acting up on ya
August 17, 2011 at 7:28 pm
I think you should limit the number of people who can come in. It shouldn’t be open to just everyone, only us special people.
What say the first 100,000 who get in ONLY, the rest.. too bad!
August 17, 2011 at 7:38 pm
b-b-b-b-but… I’m on a slow connection….
It’s hard to keep up with the rest of you when you’re stuck up here in Vermont
(and no, I am NOT the la lecher guy.)
August 18, 2011 at 9:27 am
If you’re already registered here, then you’re one of the special 100,000! Unless you ARE that lecher guy, in which case no—look over there, milk-filled boobage! Go get ‘em!
August 17, 2011 at 7:44 pm
Is this one of those darn rapture things?
August 17, 2011 at 7:48 pm
No, that was the other night with wet Towel Mike.
August 17, 2011 at 8:25 pm
oh christ no! i already accidentally fell asleep once tonight trying to get a kid to sleep. i can’t sleep through the regretsy secret move and not get in!!!
August 17, 2011 at 9:09 pm
Ooooh, it would be just like Whimsicle Jehovah’s Witnessery!
August 17, 2011 at 7:17 pm
Oh, please please tell me that that gif means we’re going to be raping the horses and riding off on the women…. I’ve always wanted to do that.
August 17, 2011 at 7:22 pm
Um… I’ll handle the women BB… You can have the horses all to yourself…
August 17, 2011 at 7:24 pm
Thanks!
Isn’t teamwork grand?
August 17, 2011 at 7:26 pm
Gang raping horses and stealing your women: Isn’t teamwork grand?
August 17, 2011 at 10:27 pm
I’m in as well
… the woman that is…
I’ll leave the horses alone
August 18, 2011 at 4:48 am
MsB – if you don’t pop up and say “Where all the white women at?” then you will have failed and thus lost your right to ride off upon said women.
August 17, 2011 at 7:29 pm
You’re supposed to say rape twice.
August 17, 2011 at 7:32 pm
*runs through quote in head*
I’m confused now. :/
TO THE IMDB!
August 17, 2011 at 7:40 pm
It’s a different part of the movie. He likes rape.
August 18, 2011 at 10:20 pm
Can I stampede cattle through the Vatican?
August 21, 2011 at 9:14 pm
kinky!
August 17, 2011 at 7:39 pm
Have you ever seen such cruelty?
August 17, 2011 at 7:40 pm
May I organize the stampede? Through the Vatican.
Side note: I was just confirming that quote and found a site that explains “Blazing Saddles” to ESL students. It’s kind of blowing my mind.
http://www.eslnotes.com/movies/html/blazingsaddles.html
August 17, 2011 at 7:57 pm
The formatting made my eyes water and lose focus.
August 17, 2011 at 8:02 pm
I’m sorry, and me too. It’s just so bizarre in its scholarly tone, it amused me.
August 18, 2011 at 9:31 am
Same here. I can copy and paste it to a new Word doc and change the font and spacing to something more…fuck it. I’ll wait until I’d drunk.
August 17, 2011 at 8:02 pm
Holy text block, Batman! O_O I think my eyes are bleeding.
August 17, 2011 at 8:04 pm
they used the word stupider. For ESL students!
August 17, 2011 at 9:14 pm
This is stupider than… wait…
August 17, 2011 at 8:17 pm
Ooh. I’m going to use this as mock-up text instead of that boring ol’ Lorem Ipsum crap.
August 17, 2011 at 9:04 pm
Slim Pickens
was this the “real name” or the charactor name?
August 17, 2011 at 9:22 pm
Really? Let Me Google That For You
August 18, 2011 at 10:14 am
Steampunk Octopus: You are my heroine. There are SO many jokes in that one comment (to which you replied), I wouldn’t know where to start. You cut right to the bone.
August 18, 2011 at 10:21 pm
Damn! I should’ve read further down. Okay, if both of us do it, we can stampede twice as many cattle through the Vatican.
August 18, 2011 at 11:35 am
Do you know what a “plethora” is?…
August 17, 2011 at 7:17 pm
But the tearful aborted handjobs in the back of the car are why I come to regretsy.
August 17, 2011 at 7:18 pm
Isn’t it why we ALL come here?
August 17, 2011 at 7:22 pm
If it’s an aborted hand job, no one comes, here or antwhere…
August 17, 2011 at 7:23 pm
erm…anywhere
August 17, 2011 at 7:26 pm
Typos are what happen when you type one-handed, Snark. I suggest you stop what you’re doing with the other and focus!
August 17, 2011 at 7:35 pm
It wasn’t my fault, it was the pussy on the keyboard!!!
so there…meow
August 17, 2011 at 9:49 pm
damn you, arthritis…
August 17, 2011 at 7:19 pm
I thought that she meant that they would no longer be tearful or aborted…
August 17, 2011 at 7:42 pm
Well then, lean back and go at it.
August 17, 2011 at 7:20 pm
*wipes eyes and grabs germ-x*
Did you bring tissues?
August 17, 2011 at 7:22 pm
I come to Regretsy, I come to Regretsy all the time.
August 17, 2011 at 9:06 pm
I see what you did there.
August 17, 2011 at 7:23 pm
And that’s how Kitten Tears got his name…
The End.
August 17, 2011 at 9:35 pm
I come for the aborted handjobs, but I stay for the dream raping.
August 18, 2011 at 9:27 am
Dreams are the gateway to the anus.
August 17, 2011 at 7:17 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
August 17, 2011 at 7:18 pm
not here.
August 17, 2011 at 7:18 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
August 17, 2011 at 7:19 pm
you might try reading what Helen said at the top here..
just a thought.
August 17, 2011 at 7:20 pm
HK said she will be posting the link in a bit. Don’t worry, she wouldn’t leave us hangin’!
August 17, 2011 at 7:21 pm
Whoops! NanaB, you beat me to it!
August 17, 2011 at 7:21 pm
NanaB just made me snort laugh.
August 17, 2011 at 7:48 pm
Sorry
I’m just really excited!
August 17, 2011 at 7:48 pm
Reading is FUNdamental!
August 17, 2011 at 7:21 pm
shifty eyes
What posts? There haven’t been any posts.
August 17, 2011 at 7:25 pm
The posts are so SUPER SECRET that the information is invisible to idiots!
Seriously, they just look right through the information and don’t see it AT ALL.
I say it’s a spell…
August 17, 2011 at 7:34 pm
It’s the mist.
August 17, 2011 at 7:46 pm
These are not the posts you’re looking for…
August 17, 2011 at 8:09 pm
August 17, 2011 at 10:14 pm
That’s a pretty funny… *all hail the hypnocat*
August 18, 2011 at 9:29 am
I just ordered salmon for lunch, but now I want a tuna sandwich.
Mmmm… Oregano.
August 17, 2011 at 7:36 pm
They were moved to that one site about the stuff from the guy and the chick.
August 17, 2011 at 9:35 pm
I know the guy who runs that site, we used to go to different schools together.
August 17, 2011 at 7:50 pm
Shit, where are these posts? I sure don’t want to end up like the rest of my family, staring at the ceiling while yelling I can’t find my shoes.
August 17, 2011 at 7:17 pm
I’ll tingly in my nether regions with anticipation. No, wait, that’s a yeast infection.
August 17, 2011 at 7:21 pm
viva la twat rot!
August 17, 2011 at 7:22 pm
wow, apparently tingling nethers come with the territory!
August 17, 2011 at 7:50 pm
Tingling Nethers – yet another great new band name!
August 17, 2011 at 7:55 pm
Sounds like a line that you’d find at an 18+ store.
August 17, 2011 at 7:18 pm
Can we still go to Finland? I’m gonna gas up the Pinto, you fat, jealous losers!
August 17, 2011 at 7:18 pm
regretsy speakeasy– where the alcohol flows freely and the men are without shirts.
August 17, 2011 at 7:21 pm
Without shirts in skirts.
August 18, 2011 at 9:17 am
That was a kilt! A kilt, I say. Skirts, by definition, are made of some sort of billowy material, or wait, am I thinking of a frock?All I know is that they may take our lives, but they’ll never take… OUR FREEDOM!
August 17, 2011 at 7:28 pm
Except I’m getting really tired of looking at that ad on the right with the black hairy fat belly.
August 17, 2011 at 7:58 pm
I am totally with you on that. I don’t think that one’s either of our belly messengers.
August 17, 2011 at 9:13 pm
I’ve adblocked that ugly hairy bastard.
August 17, 2011 at 9:36 pm
I may be hairy and a bastard, but ugly? That’s harsh.
August 17, 2011 at 7:19 pm
I’m embarrassed and ashamed to be this excited about it. But I’m awfully fucking excited about it.
August 17, 2011 at 7:20 pm
A secret place that is more secret than the old secrets were? My nether regions are all atwitter! Again! But Regretsy tends to do that to me anyway.
August 17, 2011 at 7:27 pm
Psh… Being atwitter is so MAINSTREAM.
I’m UnTwitter.
August 17, 2011 at 8:54 pm
I was UnTwitter, before you hadn’t even heard there was Twitter.
August 17, 2011 at 7:20 pm
Now I know what it’s like to find an underground club, with a hidden door in a dark, urine soaked back alley, where all the hip young people go. I feel so cool.
August 17, 2011 at 7:24 pm
Pfffft. “Cool” is so two weeks ago. We’re using “fauxbo” now. But you probably haven’t heard of it, it’s pretty underground.
And yes, urine-soaked alleys are where it’s at. With a hint of used condoms…just to spice it up a bit.
August 17, 2011 at 8:31 pm
I used to spend all my time in an underground club, but then it moved to the first floor and became so mainstream.
August 17, 2011 at 7:20 pm
Finally!! I’ve been saving a new bottle of tequila just for this occasion. SECRET STUFF SOMETHING PARTAAAAY!!!
What? I wasn’t supposed to start drinking right now?
August 17, 2011 at 7:22 pm
hoshit, i have some archers peach shnapps in the fridge!
I’ll get started with you
August 17, 2011 at 7:23 pm
It’s never the wrong time to start drinking.
August 17, 2011 at 8:00 pm
It’s 5 o’clock somewhere after all.
August 18, 2011 at 9:31 am
AM or PM?
August 17, 2011 at 8:01 pm
I started hours ago. My boyfriend mixes drinks for me in exchange for boob shelfage.
August 17, 2011 at 8:12 pm
YEAAAHAA tehn!! I forgot what I was celebrating… que me traigan mas tequilaaaaaaa!
August 17, 2011 at 8:46 pm
i’ll have you know that your screen name has made me leave the comfort of my bed to go get a bowl of ice cream. and also that this is not the first night that i have had to do that.
August 18, 2011 at 4:16 pm
Oops! lol.
August 17, 2011 at 7:21 pm
I was really worried that I’d missed the party, glad to know the party hasn’t started. I bet it’s going to be a wild one
August 17, 2011 at 7:21 pm
Loving the Blazing Saddles gif!!
August 17, 2011 at 7:24 pm
Mongo like candy.
August 17, 2011 at 7:24 pm
Mongo is only pawn in game of life.
August 17, 2011 at 7:32 pm
Candygram for Mongo!
August 17, 2011 at 7:33 pm
Whose Mongo?
August 17, 2011 at 8:34 pm
My comment “Whose Mongo?” was a joke, like that would be the way Mongo himself would write it. Ya know, “Whose” instead of “Who is”??? Geez.
August 17, 2011 at 9:09 pm
@BlackGermanShepherd — Keg cozy. That’s all I have to say… Keg. Cozy.
August 17, 2011 at 9:10 pm
No seriously. I <3 you BGS. I really, really do.
August 18, 2011 at 10:47 am
@Steampunk Octopus: “Keg…Cozy”? That’s almost too cruel for you. (Notice I said almost.) But, it does put the thought in BGS’s mind and now, just sit back and let his imagination do its dirty work. I love the power of suggestion!
August 18, 2011 at 4:04 pm
@SteamieFunk & @MugCumShotDoosyDoodles Fat Jealous losers can’t think their way out of their bag of Cheetos to HAVE an imagination…and I have to remind you two of that??
August 22, 2011 at 8:56 am
@BGS: Would that be Puffy, Crunchy, or Baked Cheetos?
August 17, 2011 at 7:36 pm
Holy shit, it’s Mongo!
August 17, 2011 at 8:43 pm
“What Knockers!”
Oops, sorry, wrong movie…
August 17, 2011 at 7:34 pm
YES! Well, it’s Mel Brooks, and what films are a better fit for Regretsy? (Maybe, the RiffTrax version of Manos, Hands of Fate. Maybe).
I’ve been thinking about this movie, and now I have to watch it.
August 17, 2011 at 9:37 pm
RiffTrax +++++
August 18, 2011 at 10:26 pm
We went to a Rifftrax show last night. The main feature was “Jack the Giant Killer,” and the short was a 70s educational film about two grade-schoolers pondering “What Is Nothing.”
August 17, 2011 at 8:12 pm
Oh…. Mel Brooks is the man!
August 17, 2011 at 8:33 pm
piss on you! i work for mel brooks!
August 17, 2011 at 9:11 pm
I work for drinks.
August 17, 2011 at 7:21 pm
I was planning on actually getting out of the house tonight, seeing some friends. And then I remembered…REGRETSY IS THE ONLY FRIEND THAT MATTERS. So I’ll be staying in tonight.
August 17, 2011 at 7:21 pm
It’s 3:22am. I was GOING to go to sleep. I have a big day ahead and an even longer one the next day.
but NO.
Now I’m going to stay up EVEN LONGER.
because i love you.
August 17, 2011 at 7:23 pm
I could watch that gif for way longer than that meatspin hypno-voodoo.
August 17, 2011 at 9:40 pm
That hypno-voodoo that yoodoo so well.
August 17, 2011 at 7:23 pm
“Have you ever seen such cruelty?”
August 17, 2011 at 7:24 pm
“You will also not be able to smell the alcohol from there, and there will be no more tearful, aborted handjobs in the back seat.”
This line made me think “hawt.” There is something wrong with me beyond words.
August 17, 2011 at 7:48 pm
Aw, a low comment rating for my weirdness. I’ve finally arrived!
August 17, 2011 at 8:04 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
August 17, 2011 at 7:25 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
August 17, 2011 at 7:27 pm
Speaking of gifs, I sincerely hope the link will be painted on some hot guy’s abs. Or some Renn chic’s boobshelf.
(Goetsy)
August 17, 2011 at 7:29 pm
Dror seems like he’s still pretty booked so I’m betting on Mike or his “sidekick”. Or MAYBE part of the surprise is some fresh meat… a Holy Trinity of Regretsy hot bods wouldn’t be a bad thing…
August 17, 2011 at 7:54 pm
The pool boy.
Or duck.
August 17, 2011 at 7:27 pm
Neeeeever mind. Blazing saddles, of course!
August 17, 2011 at 7:35 pm
Well done. Let me give your this laurel, and hardy handshake.
August 17, 2011 at 7:35 pm
*you
August 17, 2011 at 7:34 pm
-see my comment above.
August 17, 2011 at 7:26 pm
I thought that she meant that they would no longer be tearful or aborted… I was a fairweather fan, but the posts and people here are so amazeballs that I’m addicted.
August 17, 2011 at 7:27 pm
the hell?
that’s not what I wrote!!
Or where I wrote it!
August 17, 2011 at 7:27 pm
Hang in there… The link will come soon. She promised.
August 17, 2011 at 9:04 pm
I love your name. It’s gross.
August 17, 2011 at 7:28 pm
August 17, 2011 at 7:32 pm
A picture that is worth a thousand words, three letters and a number.
August 17, 2011 at 7:34 pm
cf4l?
August 17, 2011 at 7:37 pm
Yes, cf4l! Important enough to go on an elephant’s arse.
August 17, 2011 at 8:05 pm
If “CF4L” is confusing to you, perhaps you should just back away now, slowly, so as not to spill any of our drinks.
August 18, 2011 at 1:08 pm
Of course I know CF4L… I was questioning if that was the three letters and number.
August 17, 2011 at 7:33 pm
All aborted handjobs do is get the pro-lifer’s knickers in a twist.
August 17, 2011 at 7:43 pm
Every sperm is sacred,
August 17, 2011 at 7:56 pm
I love that song!!
August 17, 2011 at 7:34 pm
I have two words for you, HK: COCK. TEASE.
And I don’t even have a cock. But I do have a raging lady boner for this new super secret stuff.
August 17, 2011 at 7:43 pm
Weird. I have a clever and witty reply, and it’s disappearing…….
August 17, 2011 at 7:45 pm
Hmm…
methinksthat we’ve been on DOUBLE SECRET PROBATION the entire time, and this is a clever trick to entice us into shenanigans and tom-foolery, and I, for one, want NO PART OF IT! Now GOOD DAY TO YOU!!!!Psst: please let me in to your club. I can get beer.
Your violation of language rules landed you in the spam folder – BD
August 17, 2011 at 7:50 pm
Ok. Just delete the rest that show up. Didn’t realize that word was a rule-violator. Never had that happen before.
August 17, 2011 at 7:46 pm
I feel like Haley Joel Osment (Osmet?) should be whispering the title of this post. Then we all find out Towel Mike is really Bruce Willis.
Sorry, should have said “Spoiler Alert.”
August 17, 2011 at 8:05 pm
…He’s not an Osmond?
*googles*
Osment. Whodathunkit.
Regretsy: Correcting pop-culture misformation one misnomer at a time.
August 17, 2011 at 7:47 pm
The banner above (for me) is an ad for an alcohol addiction recovery facility.
SHUT UP, YOU DON’T KNOW MY LIFE!!!!!!!!!!
August 17, 2011 at 7:51 pm
At least it’s not for “Gay Thug Dating” as it showed up for a friend of mine once.
August 17, 2011 at 8:07 pm
*Blinks*
Now I’m picturing a completely gay gang. It’s very much west-side storyish with lots of snapping and dancing. In the intermission they gut the people wearing white shoes after Labor Day.
August 17, 2011 at 8:31 pm
I have American Family Insurance. But I swear I’m not boring!!! No really! Let me show you my slug tea party collection!! WAIT!!!!!!!!!!!
August 17, 2011 at 8:33 pm
Technically, they’re leeches. But whatever. I’m drunk.
August 17, 2011 at 7:50 pm
I am so terrified right now. I will never be able to find the new thing. I am going to be left in the dust.
August 17, 2011 at 7:56 pm
Like we’re going to leave you behind, Rev. You bring the funny.
August 17, 2011 at 8:03 pm
It’s ok, just do what I do when I can’t find things. First I get incredibly drunk, then I take shots, then I have no idea what happens. Eventually I either forget what I was looking for or that I was ever looking for something in the first place. It’s a brilliant plan capable of solving the world’s problems… I think.
August 18, 2011 at 6:30 am
It worked! Thanks for this helpful tip, I shall endeavor to use it whenever an obstacle is placed in my path.
August 17, 2011 at 8:43 pm
And what if once we get there we can’t find our way back to Regretsy?!
I’ll be leaving a trail of ironic mustaches just in case…;-{
August 18, 2011 at 9:36 am
Just click your heels together three times…
August 17, 2011 at 7:52 pm
Wow, your timing is incredible… we JUST watched Blazing Saddles a few days ago! (Well, we watched a good chunk of it, until the hubby got fed up with me saying every single line 2 seconds before the actual line – I was a little drunk… I mean charming).
August 17, 2011 at 8:36 pm
You’re one up on me. My boyfriend says I’m just more drunk when I’m drunk.
August 18, 2011 at 6:20 am
I didn’t actually ASK him. I’m just assuming I was witty and charming. (See, now I’ve added “witty” as well… because there’s nothing more clever than slurring – I mean repeating – movie lines that someone else wrote)!
August 17, 2011 at 7:57 pm
I am so simple I think I’ll just watch the man punching the lady until the secret spot is up. I can’t stop giggling at it! And I’m not even drunk…
August 17, 2011 at 9:27 pm
I read that as “I’ll just watch the man punching the lady in the secret spot.”
August 17, 2011 at 8:01 pm
I’m in a fight to the death brawl with my F5 button until the link goes up.
August 17, 2011 at 8:02 pm
On my second tab.
August 17, 2011 at 8:15 pm
Is it tonight yet? Work is slow, I need Club Fuckery.
August 17, 2011 at 8:23 pm
WHERE DA WHITE WIMMIN AT???
August 17, 2011 at 8:28 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
August 17, 2011 at 8:47 pm
Wtf? Rickroll? Come on, you can do better than that.
August 17, 2011 at 8:55 pm
Just being lazy…
Keeping up with the comments and watching FB for the link is exausting…
‘sides, guy at karaoke Rickrolled the bar Saturday, so I thought I’d share the love, though I should have put it under one of the where it it posts.
August 17, 2011 at 9:14 pm
I went there. And I enjoyed it. Just don’t do it again. (at least, not too soon)
August 17, 2011 at 9:21 pm
Nah, not usually my style, but the moment seemed as ripe as the joke.
August 17, 2011 at 8:29 pm
I will be missing the goodies. Will return in force when I come back, lol. Miss you fat, jealous losers already!<3
August 17, 2011 at 8:31 pm
I just went through my liquor cabinet and I have cherry vodka, rum, and butterscotch schnapps. For mixers I have berry-flavor Disney “Cars” themed juice boxes, limes, and some flat ginger ale. Hmmmmm. Let the fuckery begin!
August 17, 2011 at 8:45 pm
Oh, honey. Com’n over to my house. I will give you ca-an-dy!
(Malibu, Captain Morgan, multiple flavored vodkas, a couple of Irish whiskeys, a Scottish whisky, Godiva chocolate and white chocolate liqueur, multiple flavors of schnapps, and a few different gins.)
August 17, 2011 at 8:47 pm
mmmmmmmm!!! all of the above please!
August 17, 2011 at 9:15 pm
No prob. *passes drink to nerdgirl*
August 18, 2011 at 9:39 am
Would that be a Regretsy Island Iced Tea?
August 18, 2011 at 10:59 am
Thanks, Steampunk! You’ve saved me the trouble of writing out a shopping list for the weekend.
August 17, 2011 at 8:34 pm
You’re doing this to infuriate the Latvians, aren’t you?
August 17, 2011 at 8:37 pm
“Secret Things Are Happening” sounds like the title to a lost Judy Blume book.
August 17, 2011 at 9:29 pm
Or an really bad After School Special.
August 17, 2011 at 8:50 pm
Hold it! What the hell is that shit?
“Hold it” is one way to say “stop what you’re doing.” Note that “the hell” is added to wh questions for emotional emphasis, and that “shit” can be used to refer to any particular thing or general situation.
August 17, 2011 at 8:59 pm
“Ow” (rhymes with cow) is what you say when something hurts you.
August 17, 2011 at 9:47 pm
I beg to differ. Your “shit” comment was quite personal to me.
August 17, 2011 at 8:59 pm
Why do I feel we’re gonna have to click on a goatse gif somewhere in the course of the evening?
August 18, 2011 at 11:02 am
Can you imagine if April had gotten really, really evil and set up a video link that took us inside a goatse and we’d have to sit there until we got to the end of the “rainbow” and then we’d be at Club Fuckery. Fortunately, she’s not that evil. Unfortunately, I have an overactive imagination sometimes.
August 17, 2011 at 9:01 pm
OMG I just went looking for a ‘refresher’ of Towel Mike and I can’t find him.
To quote a recent fuckery, I’M TIRED OF YOUR SHIT HELEN.
Come on with the super-secret magic already!
August 17, 2011 at 9:02 pm
We like our shit real.
August 17, 2011 at 9:05 pm
I think April is setting us up for a fake flounce like when Stile from the Sitle project faked suicide.
Oh crap I ruined it!
August 17, 2011 at 9:25 pm
Can you set it up like a Highlights hidden picture so we’ll have to hunt for it? I’d love to see Towel Mike as Gallant and the fauxbo husband as Goofus.
August 17, 2011 at 9:29 pm
alright. all my muscles are involuntarily twitching and i’m passing out. i pray to the gods of fuckery that i will be allowed in the club in the morning. farewell bitches.
August 17, 2011 at 9:42 pm
IT’S HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
August 18, 2011 at 6:57 am
Ohh Blazing Saddles…now that’s a classic movie!
August 18, 2011 at 9:55 am
I know where it is… Or, at least I think I do… Makes me feel special, or maybe that’s the early morning cocktails?
August 18, 2011 at 2:07 pm
What if you don’t have or want a fb account?
August 18, 2011 at 7:01 pm
There’s always twitter.
August 19, 2011 at 5:31 pm
what if you use / WANT neither of these?