Sexy Sacks, Man
Okay, maybe it doesn’t look like much in the picture, but trust me, it’s pretty hot in person. I wore one of these once, and it was super sexy.
Of course, I was getting an MRI and it was open in the back.
Okay, maybe it doesn’t look like much in the picture, but trust me, it’s pretty hot in person. I wore one of these once, and it was super sexy.
Of course, I was getting an MRI and it was open in the back.
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July 29, 2011 at 11:55 am
I guess they think its perfect for a night out because there is easy access???
July 29, 2011 at 11:55 am
More proof that the hipster definition of sexy is very, very different from mine…..
July 29, 2011 at 12:27 pm
sexy…i do not think it means what you think it means, seller…
July 29, 2011 at 1:01 pm
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July 29, 2011 at 1:02 pm
July 29, 2011 at 1:15 pm
Yes, I think anyone wearing that dress won’t have any problems if they’ve forgotten the birth control…or if they weren’t sure if they wanted sex in the first place…both problems solved.
July 29, 2011 at 2:30 pm
I’m worried about any outfit described as “interesting.” Like whimsicle in crafts, or “cozy charmer” in real estate, it fires off an a mental alarm.
July 29, 2011 at 3:14 pm
When my mom saw my first apartment (one-bedroom, apt was about 350 square feet total), she was very quiet and then said it was “Cozy.” Until that point, she’d used that word only to describe the covering for a tea kettle. It was Mom-speak for “What the hell is my youngest doing living in this hole-in-the-wall? And that bastard is asking HOW much for it? I thought you had better sense than this. PLANTS have better sense than this. Oh, and by the way, I’ll be giving you a few to kill. You do that so well. And yes, you can always move back home, if you want.”
She was nothing if not polite.
July 29, 2011 at 11:55 am
I thought it was supposed to be open in the front.
July 29, 2011 at 11:56 am
Sex appeal is all about the right attitude, none of which is present in this photo.
July 29, 2011 at 11:56 am
$155 is a bit expensive for a nightgown. Especially one that is guaranteed to not get you laid.
July 29, 2011 at 11:57 am
I was thinking that, too, actually…
July 29, 2011 at 12:03 pm
I’d like this as a nightgown. Billowy.
July 29, 2011 at 1:42 pm
me too! I was thinking I might look into buying it..until it was about 125 bucks wayyy too expensive.
July 29, 2011 at 1:54 pm
A king-size pillowcase + a pair of scissors. I just saved you $150.
July 29, 2011 at 2:27 pm
But too tight at the neck – I toss & turn and would choke myself.
July 29, 2011 at 12:08 pm
I think you are overestimating the effect of clothing on a man’s desire to have sex. Or appearance in general.
I don’t think she’d have to ask too many guys to find one who would fuck her, shapeless gown or not.
July 29, 2011 at 12:14 pm
Totally true. May not be the guy she’d like to have, but all it takes is a little compromise and a lot of tequila.
July 29, 2011 at 12:54 pm
I know I’d do her. Not so much for the dress as for the look of utter disdain in her eyes.
Her dress says “stay back”, but her eyes say “I’m calling the police.” *rowr*
July 29, 2011 at 7:49 pm
Sensible Madness, I LOVE your blog!
July 29, 2011 at 11:56 am
If by “slim and tall, feminine and beautiful” they mean completely shapeless and plain, then I have good news for them…
July 29, 2011 at 12:03 pm
But you could get a dreamy, creamy belt from another Etsy seller! Given how popular big belts are right now, it’s an inevitability.
July 29, 2011 at 12:11 pm
But it’s not the shape of the dress that does that. It’s the fabric pattern on the back!
(I know you can’t tell, but I tried typing that with a straight face. It didn’t work.)
July 29, 2011 at 1:15 pm
The fabric pattern on the back looks like they ran out of sexy beige fabric and substituted whatever they had. “We’ll just spin it to make it look like it’s SUPPOSED to be like that.”
July 29, 2011 at 2:41 pm
Looks like the reverse of a line painted on a highway. Instead of a white line on asphalt gray its the other way around.
July 29, 2011 at 5:42 pm
Reminds me of UC Davis on the first rainy day, when the newbs who didn’t have fenders on their bikes got a stripe just like that up their butt & back. It was called the Freshman Stripe.
July 30, 2011 at 8:38 am
Well good news aliceblue! It comes in not-reverse highway lane border edition too.
http://www.etsy.com/listing/77974284/urban-chinese-collar-dress
wait a sec…that means it IS SUPPOSED to be like that o_0
July 29, 2011 at 2:40 pm
Hmmm, very “interesting.”
July 29, 2011 at 2:35 pm
Maybe a tall, slim, feminine escapee from a mental institution? Although for $125 seller should throw in the bedroom slippers & wrist ID.
July 29, 2011 at 11:58 pm
That’s exactly what I thought too. ^^
July 29, 2011 at 11:56 am
Who knew I could save money on birth control? Just wear this and my husband is SURE to never touch me again.
July 29, 2011 at 11:56 am
What is with that putty color? I keep seeing it on celebrities too, lately. Unfortunately, it’s a brilliant canvas for every faux pas committed while sewing it up.
July 29, 2011 at 12:28 pm
Yeah, looks far more like putty/wet pottery clay than “cream.”
July 29, 2011 at 2:47 pm
Oh no, not putty. Because it is shiny it might look “light purple” but nothing so unhip as putty.
July 29, 2011 at 11:57 am
For it to be REALLY sexy, it needs a clown puking rainbows on it.
July 29, 2011 at 12:03 pm
You were watching Project Runway last night, too?
Well okay, I was half-paying attention because fuck Lifetime, but still.
July 29, 2011 at 12:07 pm
haha i was watching that too
July 29, 2011 at 12:30 pm
Indeed.
July 29, 2011 at 11:57 am
Maybe it’s a subtle form of advertising? Like, “I’ll lay there like a sack of spuds in bed” to save you from a horrendous one night stand?
July 29, 2011 at 11:57 am
Finally! The burlap sack is back in style! I can’t even explain how long I’ve been waiting for this day.
July 29, 2011 at 11:58 am
Is that Windex in your side pocket? BECAUSE I CAN SEE MYSELF IN YOUR SMOCK.
July 29, 2011 at 11:58 am
from heroine chic to mental ward couture, Etsy is the go to place to shop
July 29, 2011 at 5:43 pm
From the “Girl, Interrupted” collection.
July 29, 2011 at 11:59 am
This dress is downright risque…if you’re Amish, that is.
July 29, 2011 at 12:09 pm
Look at those curves! Or…for them. They’ve gotta be in there somewhere!
July 29, 2011 at 12:13 pm
This works out, I’m totally in Lancaster County.
July 29, 2011 at 12:21 pm
Look at those sexy, sexy kneecaps! The stuff Mennonite boys’ dreams are made of.
July 29, 2011 at 3:11 pm
hey now, wait a minute. this city girl had a Mennonite, and he was SMOKIN HOT and very open-minded. He put Dror and Towel Mike to shame in the hot bod department too.
Still in my top ten list of best ever.
Always makes me smile a little driving through parts of Indiana.
July 29, 2011 at 3:12 pm
um, yeah – the nightgown? sux rox, BTW.
July 29, 2011 at 2:43 pm
Was just think this would be a great transition piece if I ever decided to become Mennonite.
July 29, 2011 at 9:26 pm
A little known fact about Amish women (gleaned from My ex’s Grandmother, who lived in a rural neighborhood full of then). Underneath those plain black and blue dresses, they are generally wearing the most risque lingere they can find at Goodwill. Being ‘Plain’ on the outside does not mean you are required to be ‘Plain’ underneath your clothes.
July 29, 2011 at 11:26 pm
Oh my gosh you can see her elbows and everything!
July 29, 2011 at 11:59 am
this reminds me of the dress i made from a pillow case from a pattern in Sassy magazine in high school circa 1991.
July 29, 2011 at 2:25 pm
Yay Sassy! I made one of those pillowcase dresses too. It was a very short dress that wasn’t very flattering to my overdeveloped boobies.
July 29, 2011 at 12:00 pm
Maybe it’s “sexy” cause she stopped wearing underwear?
That’s all I got. Sorry.
July 29, 2011 at 12:00 pm
That is actually Rush Limbaugh wearing it in the photo, so they were right about it making everyone “slim & tall, feminine & beautiful”.
July 29, 2011 at 12:32 pm
I like what he’s done with his hair.
July 29, 2011 at 1:50 pm
Really! Cause I thought it was Glen Beck at first glance.
July 29, 2011 at 9:37 pm
@BB Please tell me you aren’t having impure thoughts about Glenn Beck. I thought I raised you better than.. oh sorry… I guess I forgot to mention the “No impure thoughts about Glenn Beck” rule. <3
Raising kids is HARD!
July 30, 2011 at 1:27 am
But you never expect your kids to have impure thoughts about Glenn Beck.
Anderson Cooper and Olbermann, sure, but not Glenn.
July 29, 2011 at 12:00 pm
Potato Sack Race, you’re doing it wrong.
July 29, 2011 at 12:01 pm
Nothing like seeing a tailored pillowcase after a trip to New York City that included seeing an Alexander McQueen exhibit at the Met.
I love the Internet.
July 29, 2011 at 1:31 pm
That McQueen exhibit is amazing! I came all the way from Seattle to see it and it was worth the trip.
July 29, 2011 at 9:58 pm
Oh God yes, it’s all really more like wearable sculpture than fashion.
People say there’s a line between fashion and art, and he drew it with one of those fucking magnum-sized Sharpies. And it was more like a circle around him than a line.
July 29, 2011 at 12:02 pm
Perfect for a night out to dinner at the mental institution dining hall, now that they finally have you medicated enough to be allowed out of your room.
July 29, 2011 at 12:02 pm
“Interesting stitching patterns” translates roughly to “I screwed up with my serger.”
July 29, 2011 at 12:03 pm
If she had made this out of Italian silk, she could have called it the “Sack of Rome”.
July 29, 2011 at 1:22 pm
And of French blue silk? “Sacre bleu!”
SACK-ray-BLUE
“That’s a joke, son!”—Foghorn Leghorn (ne Senatory Claghorn, “Allen’s Alley”)
July 29, 2011 at 12:03 pm
Good to know that Mr. Potato Head has finally set up an Etsy store so he can sell all those sexy outfits he’s been dreaming up.
July 29, 2011 at 12:04 pm
The thing is, she’s got some cute things in her shop! This just…isn’t one of them.
July 29, 2011 at 12:10 pm
Not only are there cute things in her shop, this piece looks very well made. I love the neckline, it would be awesome on a fitted sleeveless blouse.
Which mean, this fit of the “dress” is intentional. WTF?
July 29, 2011 at 12:11 pm
Fit?
July 29, 2011 at 12:16 pm
You’re right. “Fit” should have been in quotes as well.
July 29, 2011 at 12:32 pm
It’s a good thing to wear if you’re having a fit, or a seizure.
July 29, 2011 at 3:02 pm
Try to make me wear it & I will have a fit.
July 29, 2011 at 9:38 pm
Actually it’s NOT a good thing to wear to a seizure. The pee stains will show immediately.
July 29, 2011 at 12:19 pm
I have a t-shirt with that neckline. I like it a lot.
July 29, 2011 at 12:51 pm
The thing is I can see how to make this dress ACTUALLY sexy in about 30 seconds. Put a wide obi style belt on it in a nice color that stands out from the neutral fabric and it would be very cute.
July 29, 2011 at 3:33 pm
That was my thought too–put a wide belt with it, and it’d be cute. Not sexy, but cute. But then, there’s the back:
and I’m just not sure there’s any rescuing that.
July 29, 2011 at 9:39 pm
This stripe reminds me of prisoner uniform.
July 29, 2011 at 12:05 pm
I think it’s really pretty, and the fabric looks really nice. It drinker needs a belt, but thanks to the neutral color just about every belt in my closet matches. If it weren’t so out of my price range, I’ve buy it.
July 29, 2011 at 12:07 pm
I wrote that on my phone. OMFG. Auto correct. Go die.
July 29, 2011 at 12:16 pm
It seems to have completely changed what you meant to say into that you like the dress. pillowcase. sack. thing.
July 29, 2011 at 1:27 pm
Breaking News: “Auto Correct was today purchased by Etsy.”
Experts predict that the SEND button will activate an occult program to review all messages and take anything remotely negative and automatically convert it to cupcakey whimsacleness before permitting the message to be sent. The new owners suggest liberal use of smiley emoticons and lots of exclamation points, but only when you’re gushing over how wonderful something is, will aid in the expeditious sending of messages.
July 29, 2011 at 1:40 pm
I think they did, do, does? like that dress.
That or autocorrect is letting us know they are drunk?
July 29, 2011 at 1:46 pm
Figures. Summer Friday afternoon, most people long gone from the office and Auto Correct is already drunk. Got me some catching up to do.
July 29, 2011 at 12:20 pm
If this dress had a skinny belt, was a brighter color, and didn’t have that ridiculous racing stripe on the back, it would be an updated 80′s look. As it is, it’s hideous.
July 29, 2011 at 12:26 pm
So if it were completely different, it would be different?
July 29, 2011 at 12:35 pm
Exactly.
Look, I was a teenager in the 80′s. It wasn’t pretty then, and it’s not pretty now. (Yes, I thought it was pretty back then. But I was a teenager. I’m smarter now.) Fashion’s lowest point remains firmly in the 70′s, but the 80′s weren’t much better. Reliving either decade’s fashions is just stupid.
July 29, 2011 at 1:29 pm
Hey, Steampunk, lighten up on the 70s! We had bell bottoms, and hip huggers, and midi tops, and tube tops, and blue and green eyeshadow, and platform shoes, and hot pants, and….
Never mind.
July 29, 2011 at 2:59 pm
@ fluffermom: Hmm, all of that is appealing to me except the platform shoes. I’ve sprained my ankle on those fuckers. But you will not pry my flare jeans out of my cold, dead hands!
July 29, 2011 at 12:06 pm
This dress just screams escaped mental patient.
July 29, 2011 at 12:07 pm
It’s essential for any Sarah Connor cosplay!
July 29, 2011 at 3:08 pm
Means that the dress is off its lithium. At least we know from the description that it is breathing comfortably.
July 29, 2011 at 12:07 pm
There, I fixed it for you.
July 29, 2011 at 12:39 pm
Renee O’connor can and has pulled it off.
July 29, 2011 at 12:07 pm
“The fabric combination in the back” intrigued me. Turns out it looks like a wide strip of duct tape running down her back:
http://ny-image2.etsy.com/il_570xN.257813026.jpg
And duct tape is HOT. Damn, now I’m remembering my MacGyver crush…
July 29, 2011 at 1:23 pm
But there’s no rope, paper clip, or turkey baster for MacGyver to fix this mistake.
July 29, 2011 at 5:47 pm
And no MacGyver.
July 29, 2011 at 12:07 pm
The seller should cut the bs and call it “Bloat-Hiding Dress” or “Sex-Deflecting Dress.” Or make it in a dark stain-hiding color and call it “On My Period Dress”.
July 29, 2011 at 12:08 pm
Other things that are just as sexy:
-sinus medication
-small appliance repair shops
-chewing with your mouth open
-down vests
-the old lady down the street who collects Thomas Kinkade
-corduroy pillows
-vests covered with lots of “wacky” buttons
-snaking the shower drain
-a tour of a soup factory
-conversations with residents of Sedona about the healing power of crystals and energy vortices
-changing your printer ink
-looking for change between the seats to pay a bridge toll
-a 2002 Kia Sorento
-taking the train from Newark to Trenton
etc., etc., etc.
July 29, 2011 at 12:17 pm
-conversations with residents of Sedona about the healing power of crystals and energy vortices
…do, please? and video.
July 29, 2011 at 12:19 pm
July 29, 2011 at 1:36 pm
When on the train from Newark to Trenton, I like to “check in” on Facebook at the most obscure businesses that come up on the list.
July 29, 2011 at 4:41 pm
Oh come on, some of those are WAY sexier!
July 29, 2011 at 5:49 pm
That reminds me. Damned printer needs another black ink cartridge.
July 29, 2011 at 12:08 pm
Isn’t there supposed to be a window for her to be gazing out of nearby? Maybe she’s looking at Level 4 Cat.
July 29, 2011 at 12:08 pm
Oh, sure, you all are laughing now, just wait until next year when potato sack fashion goes into full swing. You could be ahead of the fashion curve, but nooooooo!!!
July 29, 2011 at 12:23 pm
I hear they’re all the rage in Paris
July 29, 2011 at 1:24 pm
LUCY AND ETHEL!
July 29, 2011 at 1:25 pm
Hot damn, I was thinking about trying to find that pic so I could post it here, then I realized I was too lazy to do it, then I saw that you’d already done it, so hooray!
July 29, 2011 at 12:24 pm
In this case, wouldn’t that be ahead of the fashion line? I don’t see any curves here!
July 29, 2011 at 12:27 pm
Dear gods I HOPE this doesn’t turn into an entire line!
July 29, 2011 at 5:50 pm
I’m skipping the skinny jeans fashion, I think I’ll skip the potato sack dresses, too.
July 29, 2011 at 12:11 pm
Really? could you belt that bad boy or something. Successorize please..the biggest joke, its $155 price tag. Bitch, please..
July 29, 2011 at 12:13 pm
I wore one of those till I promised to take my medication and they let me leave.
July 29, 2011 at 12:13 pm
I’ve learned that most clothes that look really good on the models will not look the same on me. But you know it’s going to be really bad when the gorgeous model can’t hardly even pull it off.
July 29, 2011 at 12:26 pm
This could actually be attractive if it were, say, bias cut and had a nice drape to it…but the body of the dress and the body of the model appear to be highly allergic to each other!
As pictured, I can only imagine a necrophiliac being turned on…
July 29, 2011 at 10:56 pm
Perhaps necrophiliac does not mean what you think it means?
July 30, 2011 at 4:53 am
Put some reinforced loop handles on the shoulders and hem and it certainly could be the perfect dress for the practical necrophiliac. Or serial killer.
“It rubs the lotion on its skin. And puts on the baggy dress agin.”
July 29, 2011 at 1:25 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
July 29, 2011 at 1:36 pm
*sandwich
July 29, 2011 at 3:17 pm
Whichever.
July 29, 2011 at 5:53 pm
I’m 5’1″ and medium build. That thing would make me look dumpy, not “slim and tall.” And my husband would wonder what was wrong with me that I was wearing it.
July 29, 2011 at 12:14 pm
Her shop has a listing for an “Urban Chinese Collar Dress” — which is the identical dress, except it’s now soul-numbing gray instead of desolate beige. When I think of all the women mining coal in the Glorious Harmony Mines of Shanghai, I like to imagine they’re wearing these dresses. It helps remind me that even when you’re going to die of black lung in country that won’t let you Google “carrots”, you are first and foremost a woman… no… A LADY.
July 29, 2011 at 12:36 pm
LeCoeur, you hava a fine career ahead of you in color naming for the big paint companies.
July 29, 2011 at 12:58 pm
No, no. The grey makes it urban. Clearly it is for the lady factory worker who prefers finer things.
July 29, 2011 at 2:52 pm
Maybe she is making camouflage garments for women being stalked. Think you are being followed? Cream dress – stand in front of dirty building; gray? Lay on parking lot. Maybe she could do “dead grass brown” for those in more suburban areas?
July 29, 2011 at 5:55 pm
I called the color our house was when we bought it “Dreary Taupe.” “Desolate Beige” would’ve fit as well. And I called the trim color “Dismal.”
July 29, 2011 at 12:15 pm
This model gets to look much prettier in several nicer items from this shop, so I won’t feel too bad for her. You win some, you lose some, and this was something lost. Probably a bet, I think.
On the other hand, if it were a third the price and a nightgown, I might think about it. It does look comfy.
July 29, 2011 at 12:19 pm
I’ve seen a man wearing this shift dress at Walmart. Seriously! But it said “Duraflame Cowboy Charcoal” on it. (I really have to start working on a “Fashions of Walmart” line to meet the needs of crack psychotics and post-ironic hipsters.)
July 29, 2011 at 2:58 pm
I’m trying to visualize the fashion clusterfuck that characterizes a post-ironic hipster. It’s making my brain work harder than when I try to figure out Roman Grant’s family tree.
July 29, 2011 at 12:19 pm
This seller doesn’t follow the Etsy writer’s workshop principals! Create a world of fantasy!
“She gazed off into the distance, her cream colored sex dress draped over her carcass like a discarded kleenex on the floor of a pornographic theater. ‘Roderigo’, she whispered.
‘No,’ he replied. ‘I am wistful for a life without you, a life without coleslaw, a life where your dress isn’t so perfect for a night out, with two side pockets and a fabric combination in the back.’
‘I understand,’ she breathed, sexily. For every word he said was true.” $155 for pure creamy sophistication anyone can wear.
July 29, 2011 at 12:25 pm
YOU WIN MY LIFE.
That is all.
July 29, 2011 at 12:30 pm
And I didn’t even take the coleslaw class!
July 29, 2011 at 1:32 pm
But, you failed without the zydeco. Unless Rodrigo is an out of work accordion player. Oh, the sexy tragedy!
July 29, 2011 at 1:33 pm
It’s an innate gift. Some people have a touch of creativity, but you, dear RBIOIU13, are full of it.
July 29, 2011 at 1:35 pm
RBIOU13:
*looks around, nervous, whispers to next poster* “She’s laughing, right? Tell me she’s laughing!”
“I kid because I love.”—Homer Simpson
July 29, 2011 at 8:33 pm
Mugsy Doodle, i think you nailed it – I am most definitely full of it!
Roderigo once served time in a third world prison for zydeco related crimes. That is revealed in the second season.
July 29, 2011 at 12:20 pm
You know, we’re all ripping on this dress for it’s shape. Has anyone stopped to think how badly this might hurt the model? Perhaps SHE’s the one with the shape problem. All…flat and blobby at the same time. IT’S A MEDICAL CONDITION!
…or something.
July 29, 2011 at 4:11 pm
Like the kale chick whose ass was on backwards? Yeah, we aren’t giving the dress enough credit.
July 30, 2011 at 12:06 am
Then it’s a medical gown for a medical condition.
July 29, 2011 at 12:25 pm
My first reaction, seriously, was “What the hell is sexy about THAT?” But all of you said it so much better than I could have. I have long, shapeless T-shirts for sleeping in that are sexier than that dress.
July 29, 2011 at 12:30 pm
Nothing on earth could make this look sexy. Did she design and sew it herself or was it something she picked up at a garage sale and had to say something about, anything that might get it sold? It actually looks more steampunk than sexy.
July 29, 2011 at 12:30 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
July 29, 2011 at 12:33 pm
Anyone else get the feeling that the interesting pattern on the back was because she ran out of the craptastic putty colored fabric and needed something to fill the gap?
July 29, 2011 at 3:00 pm
Pillow cases only come so large.
July 30, 2011 at 4:57 am
Maybe it’s just a lack of technical skills required for installing a zipper.
July 29, 2011 at 12:34 pm
That sack looks as feminine as a penis.
July 29, 2011 at 12:38 pm
I think if she were wearing a penis, it would be MORE feminine than this.
July 29, 2011 at 12:43 pm
http://i74.photobucket.com/albums/i249/Dissen529/penis_in_dress.jpg
It’s at least in a dress.
July 29, 2011 at 12:36 pm
Now, now people — that dress is the raciest thing around down at the polygamist compound!
July 29, 2011 at 12:39 pm
From her longer item description on her page: “The fabric is extremely soft, smooth and breathing, and the great color is so unique that one might see it as cream or light purple.”
This great dress is so unique that one might see it as a dress or a potato sack!
July 29, 2011 at 1:37 pm
And as two colors that are not even remotely related to each other.
July 29, 2011 at 3:07 pm
I’m rather upset that the dress is “breathing.” Don’t the cupcakes usually wait until it is roadkill or mummified before shitifying it? Not only is living clothing creepy, what if it is a heavy breather? Imagine trying to sleep at night with that thing gasping away in your closet.
July 30, 2011 at 4:58 am
The color cream is the only “cream” that will ever get near this dress.
July 29, 2011 at 12:40 pm
From which FDLS compound does it ship from?
July 29, 2011 at 12:40 pm
FLDS….
July 30, 2011 at 6:09 am
Fundamentalist LDS: pseudo-Mormons that practice polygamy.
Probably from Colorado City, Utah. I can’t say for sure what people were wearing because I drove through there as fast as I could.
July 29, 2011 at 12:43 pm
Description on another of her items: “This beautiful blouse combines a knitted crochet flower like pattern on its top part and a woven viscose fabric on its lower part, the combination of those two fabrics creates a classic elegant blouse.”
Well, guess we know who didn’t “knit the crochet flower”…..
July 29, 2011 at 3:17 pm
Somebody’s obviously jealous they can’t knit and crochet the same yarn at the same time like this brilliant artist can.
July 29, 2011 at 12:57 pm
My first thoughts was that it was either a hospital or a very loose nightgown.
The second was that color really washes her out.
July 29, 2011 at 1:41 pm
It’s a one-size fits all type of shirt/dress.
July 29, 2011 at 3:20 pm
“‘One size fits all’ is an incomplete statement.”—Erma Bombeck
July 29, 2011 at 4:47 pm
One size fits all but fits none well.
July 29, 2011 at 5:58 pm
“One size fits all” never fits me.
July 29, 2011 at 1:07 pm
the pants made from afghans put this one down under the dirt, sexywise. & that’s scary.
this is so badly seamed it wouldnt make it past a project runway first interview.
July 29, 2011 at 2:41 pm
This actually has BETTER seaming than the bottom two on Project Runway last night!
(go to tomandlorenzo.com and look–I’ll wait.)
July 29, 2011 at 1:07 pm
You know what this woman thinks while having sex?
“Beige. I think I’ll paint it beige.”
July 29, 2011 at 3:04 pm
If she wears dresses like that she doesn’t have sex.
July 30, 2011 at 6:11 am
I’m pretty sure the meds keep her from even considering sex, even solo.
July 29, 2011 at 1:08 pm
I wore something like this at the hospital when I gave birth, except it had a flap to pop my tit out for breastfeeding. Now THAT was a sexy thing!
July 29, 2011 at 1:11 pm
Perfect for a night out… of your padded room, to eat jello in the cafeteria.
July 29, 2011 at 1:14 pm
My gran rocked this ensemble. Only she called it a duster.
July 29, 2011 at 2:58 pm
You are right! Only it was my Aunt Mary and, she also insisted on pockets. Always want that tissue with you!
July 29, 2011 at 1:30 pm
When I see items like this, it reminds me of myself back in high school.
I rocked at creative writing and sailed through that class half-asleep with an “A”. My home ec teacher gave me a “C” because “she tries so very hard but for all intents and purposes should be kept away from a sewing machine”.
July 29, 2011 at 1:43 pm
Did her comments reference The Grinch for an example of how sewing skills were lacking?
Poor Max.
July 29, 2011 at 1:47 pm
Damn, and all I made were pillows. So jealous.
July 29, 2011 at 1:54 pm
The first project was a “denim laundry bag with embroidery”. How hard can that be? Two seams, make a thing at the top for a drawstring, iron-on embroidery pattern.
I don’t even know what to call that abortion I made.
Then there was the apron.
Throw pillows with fringe.
Then my memory gets cloudy and I seem to have blocked it out.
See, I get the logistics of sewing. Needle, thread, fabric, I really do. I get it. But when it’s all said and done, it looks like Homer Simpson did it.
My teacher really liked me and I did well in the cooking part. But my sewing was sad. It inspired tears. Usually from the teacher.
July 30, 2011 at 12:11 am
I escaped only by being one of the six girls in school who took woodshop instead.
And yes, I still have all my fingers.
July 29, 2011 at 8:04 pm
Sounds just like me in school! Writing came easy but I was afraid of the sewing machine!
July 29, 2011 at 1:34 pm
I would wear this…if I was confined to my bed and nursing an illness. Oh and if someone else footed the $155 bill. Can you make a matching one for my teddy? Sheesh!
July 29, 2011 at 6:01 pm
I’d want something prettier if I was sick in bed. Or at least in a color that didn’t make me look even more washed out.
July 29, 2011 at 1:35 pm
No. No. I granteeeee that this would not make me look slim, tall, beautiful OR feminine.
July 29, 2011 at 1:37 pm
Sad Sack.
July 29, 2011 at 1:37 pm
I guess “perfect night out” involves spending some quality time with the prison matron.
July 29, 2011 at 1:39 pm
Yes, perfect for a night out.
July 29, 2011 at 1:40 pm
Ah, from the House of Orwell fashion line. The perfect garment for your job at the Ministry of Truth, erasing nonpersons and loving Big Brother.
July 29, 2011 at 1:52 pm
“…for a perfect night out” from where? The mental ward?
July 29, 2011 at 2:38 pm
I was actually just thinking that she looks like a ghost/zombie patient from pretty much every psych-hospital horror movie I’ve ever seen.
(and yes, there are more of those than you’d think.)
July 29, 2011 at 1:58 pm
There’s nothing sexier than a night on the Town with your Loved One, shoplifting.
July 29, 2011 at 2:10 pm
What’s with the price on the schmatte? How on earth does anyone justify charging that, for, as others have said, what amounts to a king sized pillow case?
Although, I have to admit, it would have been heavenly when I was on bedrest during my last pregnancy.
July 29, 2011 at 2:23 pm
I’ve seen this before!
July 29, 2011 at 3:22 pm
I thought it looked familiar, but where’s the “fabric combination on the back”?
July 29, 2011 at 2:36 pm
The collar kind of reminds me of a blouse I once made…the one where I figured out I couldn’t make collars.
I think I’m going to take a bedsheet up to the sewing room, close my eyes, and see what happens. If I use a print sheet, I should be able to charge twice this, right?
July 29, 2011 at 2:36 pm
She looks like she’s auditioning for Oliver Twist. She looks lonely, miserable, hungry, like she would say “sir” a lot. I think she might get that part!
July 29, 2011 at 2:45 pm
From the neck up, she sort of has that wistful, douche-commercial look from the 70s.
July 29, 2011 at 6:03 pm
That “not so fresh feeling” look.
July 29, 2011 at 3:02 pm
She’s bringing sacksy back
July 29, 2011 at 3:21 pm
I’m still looking for those “interesting stitching patterns,” has anyone found them?
July 29, 2011 at 4:33 pm
It’s a Magic Eye thing. Keep looking.
July 29, 2011 at 3:29 pm
First thought too, hospital gown! I think this should go to mtraub. She can give it the Etsy says you can make it all up Story of the Day award which is just what Etsy likes. What you buy on Etsy, story included, is not what you get because Etsy thinks product descriptions aren’t worth the effort.
July 29, 2011 at 3:45 pm
I can only think that this is “sexy” in that it would be easy to take off.
July 29, 2011 at 3:52 pm
Damned Tea-Baggers…
July 29, 2011 at 4:08 pm
That’s it, this one gets a place of honor on the “spank tank” wall. If you need me I’ll be in the bathroom…..try not to need me.
July 29, 2011 at 5:03 pm
Personally, I think it’s just about right.
July 29, 2011 at 5:25 pm
Wow, the seller was right. It does make her look so tall.
July 29, 2011 at 5:29 pm
Reminds me of the time a TV guide ad tried to tell me that a kaftan (translation: house dress, or mu-mu that’s not just for the obese) was both comfortable for lounging AND good enough for a sexy night out.
No. Just, no.
July 29, 2011 at 5:47 pm
So that’s where my two long-hair towels went!
July 29, 2011 at 5:50 pm
Perfect color for the Etsy front page!
July 29, 2011 at 6:21 pm
Sexy Sacks Man = Bleeding Gums Murphy
July 29, 2011 at 7:07 pm
this wont be sexy until it has glitter and sequins
July 29, 2011 at 7:15 pm
I think my mom wore something like this when I was younger, except it was floral print. Maybe that’s what was keeping her’s from being sexy.
July 29, 2011 at 8:45 pm
My Nana used to wear one of these around the house. She would also stuff tissues in her bra and up the sleeve. Sexy is a word that never came to mind when I saw her in it.
July 29, 2011 at 9:07 pm
I’m not going to lie, I’d wear.
July 29, 2011 at 9:08 pm
*it.
I’d wear it.
Fack.
July 29, 2011 at 9:35 pm
Not that bad. Add a belt and undo a couple buttons, and it’ll be upgraded to just fine.
July 29, 2011 at 10:03 pm
July 29, 2011 at 10:13 pm
fuck me I am drunk and trying to forget Iraq…but is it just me or is this dress very Oh Brother Where Art Thou?
July 29, 2011 at 10:46 pm
POCKETS! Finally, a place to sneak my morning round of medication.
July 30, 2011 at 8:43 pm
$155? Really?
In addition to this dress’s obvious unfortunateness, it’s a rip-off, construction-wise. I’m no master couturier but I could make this dress with my eyes closed. And from the description I can’t find anything that would warrant that high of a price tag. Not even “interesting stitching patterns”… whatever that means.
July 31, 2011 at 9:04 am
ICU chic
July 31, 2011 at 10:40 am
Roomy! Nice for an afternoon of shoplifting or a trip to the buffet, there’s room for lots more under that tent!