The karma sutra depicts sexual positions intended for people with baby bottle tops glued over their regular nipples. The tiny, spheroid noise is not mandatory, but many positions will be very difficult without it.
My boyfriend’s grandma would actually get a BIG kick out of these. In fact, she’d like them so much, it’s the exact reason why I’d NEVER get them for her. She’s 87 and a total firecracker. She once looked at her daughter-in-law’s flowers and remarked, “That one looks like a dick.” She’s even completely in her right mind, which makes her even more awesome.
I used to have a convertable ’71 Karman Ghia. The first time my grandmother saw it, she looked at the back seat and said, “How the hell are you supposed to get laid in that thing?”
My great-grandmother was very much like this. She used to LOVE to tell the story about how her husband would get the horse (for the horse & buggy, dontcha know) out….the horse’s name was Old Dick. And then he’d say “Haven’t had Old Dick out in a long time” to which she’d respond “Don’t I know it!!”. She last told this story when she was 89 (to me, and I was 17)
Yeah, really. A lot of people use those super cutesy-poo gigantic smiles and googley eyes in a sort of folksy, “back when the world was innocent” context. So it is hilarious to see them doing something that really justifies the huge smile!
“In breaking news tonight, a disfigured couple, mid coitus, was found in the local flour mill, partially flattened. Friends and family have been working non stop on charity cake toppers to help cover hospital costs. ”
“That’s a “D’ough” moment if I’ve ever heard one, Steve.”
“It is indeed, Sandra. Now, if you don’t mind, I have to go smear frosting on… things.”
My eyes and my brains had a long long discussion about this, and they’ve finally agreed that she isn’t crouched weirdly under his legs, she’s just bent waaaaay over in front of him. She is super flexible and her butt is amazingly perky!
Doggie style, wheelbarrow variant. At least, that’s as close as I figure it is. The maker had to seriously flatten it out so it looks like she’s practically touching her toes (or could be, from the body positioning).
I couldn’t hold that position very long myself, but it would add a lot of fun to morning stretches.
This is evidently a cake manual for what goes around comes around (karma). By age 100, I want more demonstrations then because I will have gone around and come around a lot more than is illustrated here.
If they mean kama sutra, then again, I want more pictures than this..I want 99 different positionsall around the damn cake. By 100, I deserve at least that!
He looks so proud of himself. And I love the detailing on his sugary little six-pack. She looks extremely double-jointed.
But when the cake is cut, who gets the rear entry piece?
What’s going to be even more romantic is having this put on the 25th Anniversary Cake. That’s the Coitus Anniversary, right? My marriage didn’t last that long.
True, but using this as a cake topper on a baby shower cake would actually be much nicer and more tasteful than those edible “baby butt” cakes I’ve seen…and the mother gets a sweet little souvenir. I like it.
My grandmother would probably like it. She has mostly lost her mind to Alzheimers and still gets laid more than me. With another memory patient. When they remember they’re dating.
July 24, 2011 at 9:33 am
I’ll bet Betty White would think it’s a hoot! HA
July 24, 2011 at 9:33 am
Sorry, kids, that’s not gumpaste.
July 24, 2011 at 9:35 am
It’s not Karma either.
July 24, 2011 at 9:43 am
Seller fails to realize Kama =/= Karma.
Karma. I do not think it means what you think it means.
July 24, 2011 at 9:51 am
The guy’s name must be Karma. It looks like he DID come back to get her in the (rear)end!
July 24, 2011 at 10:12 am
I’m going to pretend his name is Mr. Plow.
July 25, 2011 at 11:26 pm
“That’s my name! That name again is Mr. Plow!”
July 24, 2011 at 9:48 am
Yeah, sure, okay, fine, whatever…
Just don’t get frosting in my hair.
July 24, 2011 at 11:46 am
that’s not his tongue in her cheek.
July 24, 2011 at 9:34 am
Karma? Karma Sutra? What did I do to deserve this cake topper???
July 24, 2011 at 9:35 am
Granny – “Larry! Go grab me my reading glasses. I can’t see what’s on my cake. It looks like a set of siamese twins playing marbles or something!”
July 24, 2011 at 10:31 am
Then she remembers why she has Larry in the first place, but Grampa was the flexible one.
July 24, 2011 at 9:35 am
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July 24, 2011 at 3:35 pm
im sorry, have you ever seen boobs before?
July 24, 2011 at 9:35 am
The karma sutra depicts sexual positions intended for people with baby bottle tops glued over their regular nipples. The tiny, spheroid noise is not mandatory, but many positions will be very difficult without it.
July 24, 2011 at 9:36 am
Nose. Spheroid NOSE.
July 24, 2011 at 9:37 am
It’s humorous, tongue-in-cheek AND fun! That’s a lot of goodness packed into one anatomically-questionable polymer clay figurine.
July 24, 2011 at 1:42 pm
His tongue is no where near her cheeks.
July 24, 2011 at 9:38 am
My boyfriend’s grandma would actually get a BIG kick out of these. In fact, she’d like them so much, it’s the exact reason why I’d NEVER get them for her. She’s 87 and a total firecracker. She once looked at her daughter-in-law’s flowers and remarked, “That one looks like a dick.” She’s even completely in her right mind, which makes her even more awesome.
July 24, 2011 at 9:41 am
My ex husband’s grandmother once said “Hey! you know what Cambell’s soup and sex have in common?”
“No, Nana.”
“They’re both MMMM MMM GOOOOOOD!”
God I loved that woman.
July 24, 2011 at 1:16 pm
I used to have a convertable ’71 Karman Ghia. The first time my grandmother saw it, she looked at the back seat and said, “How the hell are you supposed to get laid in that thing?”
July 24, 2011 at 1:59 pm
My great-grandmother was very much like this. She used to LOVE to tell the story about how her husband would get the horse (for the horse & buggy, dontcha know) out….the horse’s name was Old Dick. And then he’d say “Haven’t had Old Dick out in a long time” to which she’d respond “Don’t I know it!!”. She last told this story when she was 89 (to me, and I was 17)
July 24, 2011 at 3:36 pm
My grandmother is the complete opposite. My mom brought up sex for some reason, and my grandmother said, “what?! they still do that?!”
July 24, 2011 at 9:41 am
My grandmother (may she rest in peace) would have demanded this on her cake.
She used to pinch my husband and brother in law’s collective asses when they were caught unawares.
I miss my dirty old lady grandma……
July 24, 2011 at 1:18 pm
Dirty old grandma’s are the best. They sure don’t make em like they used to.
July 24, 2011 at 9:53 am
Their faces are disturbingly similar to the characters in some Christian coloring books I had as a child. That just makes this even funnier.
July 24, 2011 at 9:59 am
Yeah, really. A lot of people use those super cutesy-poo gigantic smiles and googley eyes in a sort of folksy, “back when the world was innocent” context. So it is hilarious to see them doing something that really justifies the huge smile!
July 24, 2011 at 9:55 am
“In breaking news tonight, a disfigured couple, mid coitus, was found in the local flour mill, partially flattened. Friends and family have been working non stop on charity cake toppers to help cover hospital costs. ”
“That’s a “D’ough” moment if I’ve ever heard one, Steve.”
“It is indeed, Sandra. Now, if you don’t mind, I have to go smear frosting on… things.”
July 24, 2011 at 12:31 pm
That explains why both heads AND each of her breasts are larger than his entire chest.
July 24, 2011 at 1:19 pm
She was modeled after a porn actress.
July 24, 2011 at 9:57 am
My eyes and my brains had a long long discussion about this, and they’ve finally agreed that she isn’t crouched weirdly under his legs, she’s just bent waaaaay over in front of him. She is super flexible and her butt is amazingly perky!
July 24, 2011 at 11:15 am
On first glance I thought that he had massive balls and she was very short! My eyes and brains clearly didn’t discuss this enough.
July 24, 2011 at 9:57 am
Cake topper of an hero nature.
July 24, 2011 at 5:52 pm
I read that as “hetero nature”.
July 24, 2011 at 10:03 am
It’s bad when your birthday cake is getting more action than you do.
July 25, 2011 at 1:56 am
i wanna thumb this up but it’s sitting on +69 and can’t bring myself to ruin the effect
July 24, 2011 at 10:13 am
What position is that? I’d like to try it.
July 24, 2011 at 10:17 am
One that I sure can’t do at the moment.
July 25, 2011 at 9:04 am
Doggie style, wheelbarrow variant. At least, that’s as close as I figure it is. The maker had to seriously flatten it out so it looks like she’s practically touching her toes (or could be, from the body positioning).
I couldn’t hold that position very long myself, but it would add a lot of fun to morning stretches.
July 24, 2011 at 10:16 am
After the cake was served, Grandma spent about 45 minutes in the bathroom. Her electric denture brush was all charged up and ready to go!
July 24, 2011 at 11:51 am
Oh like no one here has ever tried their electric toothbrush that way
July 24, 2011 at 1:14 pm
*Cough* Toothbrush, no. Now, if we’re going to talk about Water Pik shower heads…
July 24, 2011 at 10:16 am
This is evidently a cake manual for what goes around comes around (karma). By age 100, I want more demonstrations then because I will have gone around and come around a lot more than is illustrated here.
If they mean kama sutra, then again, I want more pictures than this..I want 99 different positionsall around the damn cake. By 100, I deserve at least that!
Oh, and goatse in the middle.
July 24, 2011 at 10:17 am
….of the cake, not me…by 100, I am only lookin’
July 24, 2011 at 1:06 pm
@NanaB: Don’t be so sure about that. I’ve seen frisky in the high 90s.
July 25, 2011 at 9:05 am
George Burns, it is reported, was “active” until the last year or two of his live. But of course, he was God.
July 25, 2011 at 12:12 pm
My great-grandpa died at 107…of a heart-attack from doing the horizontal lambada with his 85-year-old girlfriend in the nursing home.
July 24, 2011 at 6:04 pm
If I make it to 100, I will demand this for my birthday cake.
July 24, 2011 at 10:35 am
Tongue in Cheek like a French kiss?
Or analingus?
July 24, 2011 at 11:52 am
Well toss my salad and call me Charlie!
July 24, 2011 at 10:48 am
LOVE IS…
…having exaggerated Adult bodies for once, instead of being drawn to look like 9 year olds.
July 24, 2011 at 10:59 am
He looks so proud of himself. And I love the detailing on his sugary little six-pack. She looks extremely double-jointed.
But when the cake is cut, who gets the rear entry piece?
July 24, 2011 at 12:33 pm
Yes, but it’s weird how SMALL his six-pack is. Like those mini soda cans they serve at hospitals.
July 24, 2011 at 1:14 pm
But his mipples are awesome.
July 24, 2011 at 3:14 pm
not to mention he positioning above the bellybutton. heh. maybe they’re ribs?
July 24, 2011 at 11:08 am
I would totally put that on a cake if it were edible…
July 24, 2011 at 11:54 am
What’s going to be even more romantic is having this put on the 25th Anniversary Cake. That’s the Coitus Anniversary, right? My marriage didn’t last that long.
July 24, 2011 at 1:02 pm
I thought every anniversary was the coitus anniversary! I haven’t been married, though, so I could be wrong.
July 24, 2011 at 12:51 pm
Could someone please explain this item she currently has for sale? I’m nonplussed.
July 24, 2011 at 1:01 pm
Cannibal animated Baby Ruth bars?
July 24, 2011 at 1:23 pm
Looks like rejected extras from the “Everybody Wants Some” segment from Better Off Dead.
July 24, 2011 at 6:06 pm
Or that pool scene from Caddyshack.
July 24, 2011 at 2:14 pm
thank you for using ‘nonplussed’ correctly! YES
July 24, 2011 at 7:22 pm
My pleasure. I love that word.
July 25, 2011 at 6:31 pm
The less suave, deformed, cousins of the California Raisins?
July 24, 2011 at 12:54 pm
By the by, I no longer see the ‘preview’ option when I post a comment. Is this happening to any of you other fat jealous losers? Thanks!
July 24, 2011 at 1:25 pm
Look to the right on the grey bar above the comment box.
July 24, 2011 at 7:21 pm
Thanks, but there is no gray bar. It used to be there, but is now gone.
July 24, 2011 at 1:22 pm
I love when things are done with an fun nature.
July 24, 2011 at 1:24 pm
This is what happens 9 months later. I hope you are all happy!
http://www.etsy.com/listing/65415461/sleeping-baby-on-a-blanket
July 24, 2011 at 2:33 pm
Oh, it’s polymer clay. I thought that it was edible
July 25, 2011 at 7:26 am
True, but using this as a cake topper on a baby shower cake would actually be much nicer and more tasteful than those edible “baby butt” cakes I’ve seen…and the mother gets a sweet little souvenir. I like it.
July 24, 2011 at 1:46 pm
Wouldn’t this be more appropriate on a cream pie?
(thank you Urban Dictionary)
July 24, 2011 at 3:13 pm
“tongue in cheek”
That one would’ve been more interesting to see.
July 24, 2011 at 5:35 pm
My grandmother would probably like it. She has mostly lost her mind to Alzheimers and still gets laid more than me. With another memory patient. When they remember they’re dating.
July 24, 2011 at 7:53 pm
The pug breasts are still bigger.
July 24, 2011 at 10:20 pm
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July 24, 2011 at 10:21 pm
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July 29, 2011 at 10:20 am
I just saw this, and had to come back to this thread to post it, it seems apropos and yet also, wtf.
NSFW:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U-EVtOW1hck