43 comments on Cervical Cap

  1. mutualcriticism
    July 19, 2011 at 9:55 am

    Ahoy, ho.

    Thumb up Thumb down +82

  2. Cranberry Mars
    July 19, 2011 at 9:59 am

    “salty” after dark bonfires.

    Thumb up Thumb down +19

  3. intrikat
    July 19, 2011 at 10:00 am

    Isn’t that Jennifer Love Hewitt? Boy, she must really need the money these days…

    Thumb up Thumb down +46

    • lemon_bombs
      July 19, 2011 at 11:44 am

      Nah. JLH’s tits are way better.

      Not like I look at them much or anything.

      I’ll shut up now.

      Thumb up Thumb down +31

  4. spike
    July 19, 2011 at 10:02 am

    I have this hat. I think I bought it for $7.50. “Not even remotely… oh, hey! Boobies!”

    Thumb up Thumb down +30

    • tiedyejedi
      July 19, 2011 at 10:43 am

      I have a picture of a friend trying one on at a cheesy gift shop somewhere. Pretty sure the price was about the same.

      Thumb up Thumb down +8

  5. Dawghaus
    July 19, 2011 at 10:03 am

    I have those boots. American Eagle. Not vintage. Or nautical. Also the zipper broke after two days so I was pissed.

    But I digress.

    Thumb up Thumb down +19

    • WateryTart
      July 19, 2011 at 10:17 am

      But to get back on track, Daughaus… “Ma’am? Your boot heel is caught in your …um…”

      Thumb up Thumb down +13

    • SocialSuicide
      July 19, 2011 at 1:22 pm

      Ah… I was just going to say that what I like best about this outfit is the boots. So they’re not any good either?

      Thumb up Thumb down +5

      • EmKitten
        July 19, 2011 at 4:51 pm

        Yeah, I really liked the boots too. I’ve been looking for a pair like that. Very disappointing about the zip.

        Thumb up Thumb down +1

  6. billm75
    July 19, 2011 at 10:03 am

    So Taylor Swift finally broke down and bought herself some titties. How nice.

    Thumb up Thumb down +15

    • Rad Bromance
      July 19, 2011 at 12:11 pm

      I dunno man, she’s always trying to convince us that she’s average as fuck.

      Just like this girl’s trying to convince us that it’s all about the hat.

      Thumb up Thumb down +11

  7. Stabby
    July 19, 2011 at 10:08 am

    I always go shirtless when I wear a hat, don’t you?

    Thumb up Thumb down +28

    • angelbuttons77
      July 19, 2011 at 12:46 pm

      It’s like when Elaine bought that one chick a bra, and she just wore it, without a shirt…

      Thumb up Thumb down +8

    • kimoutre
      July 19, 2011 at 3:09 pm

      And you would think someone wearing this little and trying this hard would at least look a little sexy, but….she doesn’t.

      Thumb up Thumb down +4

  8. kahinton
    July 19, 2011 at 10:12 am

    That’s not Jennifer Love Hewitt or Taylor Swift… I think it’s Mariah Carey.

    Thumb up Thumb down +5

  9. spike
    July 19, 2011 at 10:14 am

    Ah, here we go: http://store.blockbustercostumes.com/Captains-Boat-Yachting-Yacht-Sailing-Fishing/M/B002E6LPU2.htm

    Log in to Deviant Art’s “Artistic Nudes”*, and you’ve saved quite a bit. Or, you know, don’t buy it. It’s the sort of cap that involves blatant cardboard.

    *Nope, they’re not even trying.

    Thumb up Thumb down +10

    • Prestidigitator
      July 19, 2011 at 2:17 pm

      Maybe I should start doing 1000% markups.

      Thumb up Thumb down +6

  10. Knitty Knaughty
    July 19, 2011 at 10:35 am

    Is this the spawn of The Captain and Tonielle?

    Thumb up Thumb down +11

  11. twentyone
    July 19, 2011 at 10:35 am

    Damn.. feeling a little ‘inadequate’ right about now…

    Thumb up Thumb down +1

  12. muffintin
    July 19, 2011 at 10:37 am

    And people said you couldn’t make a sexy Captain & Tennille Halloween costume.

    Thumb up Thumb down +8

    • Mugsy Doodle
      July 19, 2011 at 10:39 am

      Yeah, but it should be TWO people, not one costume that combines both.

      Thumb up Thumb down +6

      • muffintin
        July 19, 2011 at 10:53 am

        This is just the Captain part! She probably sold out of the Sexy Tennille g-string and accompanying bedazzled shoulder pads.

        Thumb up Thumb down +10

  13. notthepenguins
    July 19, 2011 at 10:42 am

    Ahoy! Mid-life crisis on the starboard bow!

    Thumb up Thumb down +10

    • Steampunk Octopus
      July 19, 2011 at 10:49 am

      (singing) Starboard bow, starboard bow. Midlife crisis on the starboard bow, starboard bow, Captain!

      Thumb up Thumb down +5

  14. Monkey_Hate_Clean
    July 19, 2011 at 10:56 am

    Is she wearing those denim jean Huggies diapers?

    Thumb up Thumb down +33

  15. icraftoncrack
    July 19, 2011 at 10:58 am

    OOOO this would be the perfect ensemble for my new role as head of a stupid PTA committee. Maybe then the bitches will stop volunteering me for things.

    Thumb up Thumb down +28

    • angelbuttons77
      July 19, 2011 at 12:48 pm

      You too?? I got wrestled into running for the school board, and THEN the same people begged me to be PTO president – wtf is wrong with people??

      I like your idea of this outfit as repellent…

      Thumb up Thumb down +7

  16. iEatZombies
    July 19, 2011 at 11:16 am

    While I agree seeing things like this is annoying and I heave a heavy sigh,
    I can not deny the fact that this woman is attractive, has a nice body, and has a reason to be proud, so I won’t bash her and belittle her because then I would just be doing so in denial.

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

  17. MayhemHere
    July 19, 2011 at 12:15 pm

    I don’t know what the big deal is… I always walk around in my bra and a captians hat…

    Thumb up Thumb down +17

    • kimoutre
      July 19, 2011 at 3:11 pm

      Or is it a captions hat?

      Thumb up Thumb down +4

  18. Sara “Blueberry Twatwaffles” Bee
    July 19, 2011 at 12:55 pm

    It’s bothering me immensely that her boots aren’t laced up. I don’t care about her shorts not being zipped/buttoned up, because Lord knows it’s hard to fit into child sized shorts when you’re over 12.

    I’ll just go back to carefully arranging the pens on my desk…

    Thumb up Thumb down +21

  19. afinch
    July 19, 2011 at 1:24 pm

    There is something severely wrong with that girl’s head.

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

  20. megadoop
    July 19, 2011 at 1:24 pm

    Oh so much derpy goodness recently…I can tell I’ll be up very late catching up!

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

  21. kahinton
    July 19, 2011 at 4:51 pm

    I’m annoyed that her bra is black and her boots are brown. She should have at lease color coordinated.

    Thumb up Thumb down +11

  22. AholicRambler
    July 19, 2011 at 6:29 pm

    What a slut!

    Look at that hat, so trashy.

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

  23. thecreightonberyl
    July 19, 2011 at 8:16 pm

    The Captain and Tenille’s estranged daughter, professional “dancer” Misti Dragon.

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  24. Postmenopaws ™
    July 19, 2011 at 9:16 pm

    Official officers’ headgear of the Brazilian Navy.

    Thumb up Thumb down +1

  25. Badger
    July 19, 2011 at 9:19 pm

    My sons were born in 1980. Does that mean I they’re Vintage and I can sell them on Etsy? They’re made of 100% all natural materials.

    Thumb up Thumb down +9

  26. katfud
    July 20, 2011 at 7:29 pm

    Putting the NOT in nautical.

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

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