YOU SAVE $5.01!
YOU SAVE $19.00!
YOU SAVE $.95!
YOU SAVE $18.35!
YOU SAVE $38.00!
YOU SAVE $128.51!
Whoever buys those bottles really is lost at sea.
The sea does installations now? And no, you do not install “upon” something. When did you ever hear your mechanic say “Yerp, I installed that new air filter upon your vehicle.”
Also, they are NOT natural. Silica is natural, glass, in bottle shape, is not.
Of course they’re natural, they’re the detached snouts of bottlenose dolphins!
…Sorry, I’ll let myself out.
Aw, don’t go! With a screen name like that, you really belong here.
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
Why the fuck would you want pretty masking tape? You paint over it and then remove it anyway.
I always skim over the first ones to get to the ‘punchline’ at the bottom, if you will.
As a person who has a weird fondness for tape, I use my “fancy” tapes to seal envelopes and packages. Makes wrapping easier! That works better if it’s plastic tape, not paper tape, of course…
I too thought the tape was cute. But since I do not have an Etsy store, I don’t really mail things. I can’t justify it.
Maybe the target market is scrapbookers? They’ll buy some weird paper-related crap.
Scrapbookers and other paper artists.
Yeah, I think scrapbookers are probably the major market there.
Where’s the tape? Did it get removed? Or am I going blind (a distinct possibility)…
Bronc took it down, as it turned out not to be a savings.
You could make a pretty nice hula hoop with that tape.
There’s nothing the kids like better than toys that look like old books!
Judging by the number of hula hoops at my local farmer’s market (and the fact that my own mother has one stashed behind the couch), it’s become somewhat hip of late… kids may not appreciate the book theme, but I wouldn’t underestimate the power of middle-aged bohemian ladies in search of a new fitness trend.
@ Basil…I’m a middle aged* drunken lady and I have a hula-hoop stashed behind my couch. It hasn’t led to physical fitness though. I guess you have to actually use it.
If people are living to 115 yrs. now.
ive had several people tell me i should get some fancy printed tape for my packages instead of useing clear tape
The lump of clay made the front page? Way to go Etsy!!
Hey, when resellers shipping upgrades can make the front page, a lump of clay (with instructions!) almost seems refreshingly conceptual.
That should be “…resellers AND shipping upgrades…” Derp!
It’s only a matter of time before a reseller’s shipping upgrade appears there, so don’t worry.
In its defense, it did have “April Fool’s” and “Gag gift” in its tags. And somehow wasn’t tagged as “Potential Steampunk – Just add clock parts!”
Yeah, I know they’re kidding.
But…it made the FRONT PAGE.
So if the lump made the first page, I can only assume we’ll be seeing the following soon:
A tree – a DIY coffee table
A puddle – a DIY fishtank
A pile of manure – a DIY cholera outbreak
A rock – DIY gravel
A cow – a “slow food” DIY dinner
A stem cell – a DIY clone
A bucket of algae – DIY vitamins
A lump of coal – a DIY diamond
A slag heap – a DIY Lady Gaga album
A pail of sand – a DIY stained glass window
A rubber plant – a DIY tire
A ziploc and a straw – a DIY douchebag
A vial of mucus – DIY vagisil
A parking lot – a DIY baseball team (Dodger’s fans only!)
Anyway, you get the drift…
You know the shipping on some of those would be hellacious!
If I may add, 2 lettuce seeds, two radish seeds 2 onion sets and a pound of cow manure. DIY salad. (and organic)
I don’t care about the seeds but I’d REALLY like to send the Etsy admins. the manure! I’ll even pay postage.
@Monkey33: Your listing of the Dodgers’ parking lot comment rendered your list unfunny. A man is still in a coma because some cretins beat up on him for wearing another team’s cap. I’m glad you can find humor in that.
To Mugsy Doodle – My “DIY baseball team” was not in any way shape or form a reference to the horrific events involving Mr. Stow, nor do I really see how it went there but I guess I have to explain:
The current owner of the Dodgers – ultra-seaze Frank McCourt – had a life before baseball: he owned parking lots in Boston. After the “Big Dig” project opened up the waterfront to developement there, the value of his property skyrocketed.
McCourt then proceeded to use that property as collateral to buy the Dodgers without actually having to spend a single dime of his own real money.
McCourt then sliced up the Dodgers operation into multiple companies (the team he owns pays him rent on the stadium he owns through a seperate company, for example) so that he and his gold-digging harridan whore of a wife could strip the team of its assets more readily.
So in essence he turned a parking lot into a baseball team for free – get it?
I’m convinced that Etsy’s Earl Grey is not the same as MY Earl Grey. I don’t really like Earl Grey (I prefer Constant Comment), but I tried it, to see if it caused hallucinations and delusions, and allowed me to understand their criteria for front-page handcrafted offerings. No such luck.
So, what’s really in Etsy’s Earl Grey???
If you look closely, the website that sells the tape sells the set of three for $15 as well. Same price…
Crud. I thought it was $6 for the three pictured.
OK, the tape is out. I’m able to admit when I’m wrong. Not saying I like it, though.
I was wondering where this tape was everyone was talking about!
I saw the tape when I read the post originally, then clicked through for the comments and couldn’t find it again! And I hadn’t even been drinking yet.
I’d love to blame the person who sent it to me originally. But the buck stops here. I should have checked more thoroughly. I need to scourge myself now.
It’s okay…we’ll still respect you in the morning.
It’s okay, we’ll all pretend we didn’t see.
Holly, I think scourging involves shirtless men getting flogged. You still want to pretend you didn’t see?
I would like to see shirtless men getting flogged. Well, I guess it depends on the men…
It would also depend on which definition of flogged you mean…
Do I save an extra $8 in the last one because I get paid to clean the beach?
No, the $120 is Australia dollars. The $128.51 is US dollars, which is printed below the other figure in small type.
But there is certainly some cash redemption value (in some states) in all those bottles!
If you used Silly Putty instead, you could recycle your bowl!
Or decorate it with newsprint!
Then you wouldn’t need to cover it in printed tape!
Using Ali Baba to comparison shop can be a bit misleading, as the price you see at first is often for a quantity larger than one, and may actually require you to buy dozens or hundreds to get the quoted price. Not defending the dipshit resellers on Etsy, just sayin’ as a jewelry crafter that I often search Ali Baba for desirable materials, but cannot buy in the required quantities.
I try to always calculate using the highest price listed, meaning the lowest quantity you can purchase. I figure these bogus Etsy sellers are certainly buying in bulk, but I’ll give them credit for only buying in small bulk.
Which is already more than they deserve, considering they list all this crap as “unique” and “OOAK.”
Thanks for the clarification.
Well, at least most of them are switching up the photos this time. That’s something, I guess.
Way to set the bar low!
Do it yourself pottery! the ultimate etsy balls. “Make your own shitty crafts. I have coleslaw to appreciate.”
Their next kit will be for making coleslaw serving sets.
“Do it yourself. I have coleslaw to appreciate!” should be on Etsy Admin business cards.
I just had a great idea for an etsy product. D-I-Y business cards. Just a stack of blank papers. Unleash the soaring eagle of your spirit, and let your creativity fly!
Ah, I think I get it. Then the soaring eagle will shit on the papers form on high and you’ll sell them on Etsy?
voila! you can get them in any color, as long as it’s kraft paper brown (or some rainbow color.) If you want a standard white or cream business card you’ll have to go to Staples.
How about a pack of Xerox paper and a pen, voila!, The Next Great American Novel. (Sorry–must be able to sell internationally.)
uummm, they have those….
Suzy, I love how accurate the description is:
“About: These cards are blank.. so there is nothing on them.”
I’m not sure Mugsy Doodle. I’m fond of “with rounded edges that I have cut” (good to know that seller didn’t chew them), and that they are a “collection.” Not 20 cards or a stack of cards, nooo. These have been collected!
Unless you call out about it.
or another embroidery/t-shirt opportunity.
I love your name fluffermom.
I know it’s been renashed time and again, but it really irritates me that etsy does nothing about resellers, especially the ones claiming they aren’t.
Oh well, I guess it’s just all part of the fuckery.
enough with the legos people! holy crap.
I see no holes or a halo.
Actually the “glow” behind Mr. Crap is a halo (sorry JC for putting Mr. C over your face) but I’m afraid it lost something in Photoshop translation. Guess I have to keep the day job.
@ aliceblue: You could always slap a lens flare behind him.
My bad…. carry on.
No problem; it is not everyday that there is a holy crap sighting. JC, he pops up on toast, tortillas, in wood grain; HC you just don’t hear about in the news.
Hey so that stuff on the bottle won’t brush off unless you brush it off. FYI.
Good to know!
“The appearance has been naturally installed upon them by the sea” is the fanciest way I have ever heard anyone say, “shit’s got barnacles on it.”
Clearly someone attended the workshop.
Wonder if I could get a bid from the sea on doing new kitchen cabinets or does it only install sand?
143,000 VIEWS (not all from here) for the mini tiny camera AND WHY 25 DAYS to ship from Minnesota?
Because they can’t guarantee how long it’ll take to get to Minnesota from Shanghai
um please tell me they don’t order 1 at a time per their orders. why not get the kali excessive bulk cameras?
The paperclips kill me. I guess I’m a chump because i couldn’t even conceive of trying to sell two paperclips to someone. Adds a new dimension to stealing office supplies from work. . .
I’m still trying to decide if they are “handmade” or “vintage?”
Uh the fact that that lump of clay made it to the frontpage sorta makes me want to go on a homicidal rampage.
i seem to remember a co that would ship shit to people u hate… maybe it was sterilized shit. oh i dont know – google it
It’s sterilized horse poop, in a heart-shaped candy box. They also do dead roses.
OOO now i know what i’m sending etsy for christmas.
Make sure you mark it attn:Michelle.
Listen to any of that workshop? She already has plenty of it.
piperanasazi, I do something similar to that. It’s not shit but it may as well be. I put on this huge front like I just know they will love it. It is so funny watching them try to be nice.
Let me guess, you buy some of the things that we have featured on Regretsy?
I’m not a total dick!
I’m pretty sure I can find bottles from an Australian beach for cheaper than 130 smackers. Especially if we were still friendly with the hubby’s ex-wife, who now lives in Oz.
Of course, a beach bumpkin by nature, I’ve found some pretty interesting crap on beaches here in Oregon, and down in California.
We have the best random beach crap in Oregon. Pff, bottles! Our beachcombers find rusty cannons.
Please let us know if you locate a rusty trombone
I love looking for beach glass but I toss it in a bowl, or large shell. Also, if you really own a “Chic Vintage Seaside Abode” I doubt that you’ll want these unique sand covered bottles that smell like low tide (I like the smell but hey, I’m odd). However, if you have a “shabby shack” place like mine they’d fit in fine but don’t have $120 to be stupid even if I wanted to.
I actually bought a similar camera necklace for my daughter a few Christmases ago for $9.50 on Ebay. She really liked it, but I would have never bought it for $34.
Is it just a coincidence that the Mexican pottery clay ad looks like the cactus is giving us the finger? I think not Bronc
I also have bought a cheap camera necklace as a gift. Not that it excuses the price because I’m sure they are both cheap pieces of crap, but those two camera things are really not remotely similar.
Oh, this Compare and Save is too late for me!
My daughter’s 18th birthday is Wednesday! No time to get stuff shipped!
You know what though?
She’ll be leaving for college in the Fall. Maybe she’ll need a going-away present. Yes… now I have all summer to find crap!
Or not, because dammit, I love my kids.
Alas, I know the feeling. I sooo wanted the Harry Potter key chain. But my birthday is Saturday. I spend too much money on booze to afford next day air.
O M G! I HAVE to have that Harry Potter key chain! I wonder if they have the Weasleys also!
(Note the thick but fluent sarcasam.)
Don’t worry, Bob. We all get thumbed down sometimes!
Well it’s a lot better than it was. I was down like 15! Of course not everybody’s humor is as sick and twisted as mine.
Your reply made me smile. I read it in a really cutesy consoling voice
I don’t know. There are things I see on Compare and Save that I WANT, just not from Etsy sellers. And not at these prices.
Don’t suppose you saw this in the description for the “lump of clay” huh?
“(If you want the bragging rights, but not all the tedious work, I’d be happy to ship you a finished bowl as pictured in the second photo. Promise I won’t tell your friends. Just say so in the notes to seller.)”
Jen has a sarcastic sense of humor, sorta thought you would figure that out yourselves…
Yes, I saw it and figured it out for myself. The description is obviously tongue-in-cheek, as I have already acknowledged. I’m still going to mock the fact that this made the Front Page because:
1. It’s 20 dollars for a lump of clay and “instructions” on how to make a bowl. If you’ve ever made any pottery, you have learned how to make a bowl.
2. The person who picks items for the FP doesn’t know this is a joke.
Sure they do, it was in 5 gazillion April fool’s day treasuries.
I suppose there’s a first time for everything, even Etsy being in on the joke.
Jen made that for an April fools joke. There were a bunch of people that decided to do this for April fools. There was an eggo waffle put onto a chain as a necklace…someone wire wrapped fruit loops for another necklace(which also made the FP during the April Fools week)…and another girl put orange juice into a tiny vial for sale.
In a world that has things like this listed, I can take nothing for granted anymore.
And such a bargain, to boot!
One listing? Regretsy bait.
I love that it is a “brooch” and not just a pin; SO much classier.
the guy’s profile picture captured my reaction to that medal.
I’d be inclined to think it was Regretsy bait if the guy had other things in his store. He only has one thing though, and he can’t honestly believe it will ever sell. No amount of exposure here will make that happen.
So Etsy continues to perpetuate it’s reputation as a joke? What a shame for those of us who are serious about our handmade items. More professionalism please, Etsy!!!
Here’s the thing – that first camera locket looks cooler than the second one. But it doesn’t look *THAT MUCH* cooler. Maybe $3-5 cooler. Tops.
It’s the same locket. Just a different camera angle (I’ll let you decide which camera), and silver paint instead of gold.
They are definitely not the same if you look really closely. The first has more dimensional rings inside the rim of the lens, and also has pieces of different metal joined together instead of just sloppily applied black enamel.
I’m laughing pretty hard at the “Natural” description for those bottles.
The Lump O’ Clay took balls.
But not quite this:
They should sell those. So many people need them!
Well, that is better. I didn’t quite understand the couple of thumbs down for my being in favor of brains. Perhaps I offended some “cerebrally challenged” persons?
I’m sure those would’ve been the people that needed them.
You would lose your ass on that deal aliceblue. Mainly due to the fact that the people that need them wouldn’t see the need for them.
Then again they would always make a great stocking stuffer.
Not that I wouldn’t mind losing a bit off my posterior, but I think that if I marketed to family and co-workers of those in need I might have a pretty busy shop.
SilentBob, I love your name! I’m a big Kevin Smith fan.
The people who need them don’t even know what they’re FOR.
I want the peacock dress for my graduation It’d match my shoeeessssss
Ah, but which dress? Decisions, decisions.
The first seller, (more expensive despite being “humbly priced) describes the dress as
1.Maxi silk (sigh, maxi dress, the the fiber) & as
2. Material: Silk ( natural silk mixed with artificial fibre) AND as
3. *Quality linen fabric, perfectly constructed textile and touch.
People seem to forget that Etsy is not Craigslist.
sometimes Etsy forgets that Etsy is not Craigslist
cries and runs off to look for a bottle of vodka
Just make sure that when those bottles are empty you go down to the local beach/river/lake & anchor them in a way you can get them back after they’re covered in barnacles, sand, mud, or any other gunk. Who knew drinking could make you a profit!!
But I like over paying for crap! Makes me feel special…my mommy says I’m special.
We all think you’re special!
I know this is a little off topic. But I’m loving the “Compare and Save” picture with the mom and daughter sopping for banana hammocks together Bronc.
shopping* Man I am off today. Maybe I should start drinking earlier in the day.
Who’s to say “sopping” wasn’t accurate? [Iappropriate comment for mother and young daughter together, yes, I know!]
Whatever they are doing, they both look very happy.
The Harry Potter Keychain is from an AA member, well unless they just flounced.
No one is safe.
no flounce here…
Yay boxy! I just have to say i love your shop. And i know you put effort into actually assembling the keychains you sell. So, bravo and i hope you have mad sales from this feature!
I definitely just had a “Wait wha…? Oh I get it…” for the last one.
the cheaper camera locket does specify you have to buy at least 60 of them. Although reselling for $34 (even with the added little clear bead) is ridiculous, I wouldn’t buy 60 at $1 each either.
there must be a cheaper reseller out there!
Twenty-five days for the camera locket to ship from Minnesota? I live in Iowa-she could drive to my house and deliver it to me personally faster! I’ve ordered things off Ebay from the UK and Australia, and in most cases, they’ve arrived in two weeks (three at the most).
Holy shit! I actually complained to Etsy about that Lego-reselling Boxhounds store and lookey-loo, it’s still operating. Wow, way to go Etsy; thanks for looking out for the consumer yet again
FYI, Boxhounds contacted LEGO before opening up shop, and got permission as long as they use the LEGO disclaimer.
She’s not reselling. She does make them herself with different components.
Some days I wish I didn’t have any ethics. Then I could buy cheap crap from Alibaba and sell it on etsy and get rich, instead of making my own crap and having it just sit on Etsy because it’s “too expensive” compared to Alibaba.
tell me how do i know those bottles are really that old?
You have to know in your artistic ability that the sea “installs” the appearance very slowly.
Sometimes, I dont understand some products being sold, I paid $32.67 for a XBOX 360 and my mom got a 17 inch Toshiba laptop for $94.83 being delivered to our house tomorrow by FedEX. I will never again pay expensive retail prices at stores. I even sold a 46 inch HDTV to my boss for $650 and it only cost me $52.78 to get. Here is the website we using to get all this stuff, BidsGet.com
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