That was my favorite episode!
I’ll only watch if Doris Handmade is played by Charo.
She’ll probably be played by Doris Roberts.
She should be played by Amy Hill.
I was picturing Ms. Swan from Mad TV.
Pitty beauty pretty handmade notebook. I make “made in china” sticker too. I tell you everyting!
This photo reminds me of Anne Rice before she went batshit crazy & went all religious freak on the world.
I think I heard she did another 180 and went un-religious freak again. But I never bothered to verify that, after she got all high and mighty with people for READING HER OWN BOOKS! Christ!
He look like a handmade!
Mine too. I loved the part where they found the magical island of Thai-Dai.
I thought that was an episode of Fantasy Island?
isn’t thai-dai the isle where there professor and marianne made off to, to be alone?
Maybe your post last night channelled Jiminy Cricket, and somebody got a conscience!
I think you’re confusing “a conscience” with “caught”. Easy to do, really.
Maybe DorisHandmade just got her operation and became DonaldHandmade.
I love you.
Ok, this is definitely not right! I have always dreamed of going on the Love Boat, and am super pissed that Doris gets to go, while I’ve never been.
It’s really the proverbial slow boat to China.
That’s because they are zig-zagging.
I hope she has a journal handy so she can keep a record of all her fun adventures! And some picture frames, too!
And Etsy wonders why we no longer thing just reporting a shop is enough.
In other news, today I got called the rudest person on etsy. I don’t know if I should be upset or proud.
I think you deserve an award plaque for that!
I was a little shook up about it at first, but I knew the Regretsy folks would still love me.
It’s okay, honey. Shed a glitter tear and you shall be absolved.
Sell some cupcakes with mustaches. That’ll shut ‘em up!
Actually, we love you *more* because of it.
If you’re looking for absolution – make 20 crappy octopi rings & call them steampunk.
However, if you’re looking for support you should be PROUD! It takes a conscience & skill to be called mean on etsy.
I would also like my plaque to have on it the one eared elephant holding a baseball bat and smashing the ‘hand assembled’ octopus necklaces to bits.
How about this for now?
<img src="http://farm6.static.flickr.com/5101/5622367105_3db0eb5390_z.jpg" width="444" height="529"
SON OF A…!!!
That is the sweetest thing I’ve ever seen. It is my new favorite thing.
Go with proud. You must be doing something right.
To be fair, I’d had a bad morning so my ‘putting up with bullshit’ level was pretty low and I might have come off meaner than I thought.
But, I still don’t think it’s wrong to wish for a higher standard for hand assembling.
Amen to that! Etsy is the only venue I know where taking a pre-existing functional object and making a superfluous change that affects neither form nor function nor structure counts as 100% ‘handmade’, and frankly, I would love to see a higher standard. It’s an insult to all those artists who put forth effort in designing and creating their items, from beaded necklaces to hand-dyed, hand-spun yarn made from your own sheep’s wool.
Exactly! You buy the beads, but spend time and energy putting it together? Awesome!
You spend 3 minutes gluing stuff to other stuff? No thank you.
Hell of a thread too. I love how the basic consensus was that it’s the buyer’s fault they weren’t smart enough to tell the difference between handmade and factory made on a handmade site.
Make all the customers feel stupid and at fault! Awesome business model.
I just read that thread, and now I want to hit people myself. It was 29 pages of “People are mean to us. Meeean. Why won’t they close the thread.”
In the mean time, I gave up trying to find a lovely bracelet for my mom, because every single silver item with red jasper was made out of “tibetan” something or other. It got so I couldn’t tell what was perhaps assembled, a reseller, or maybe something cool and unique.
I found a very nice bracelet on Amazon instead. My mom loves it.
OK, please no calling out. I’m going to have to close up this thread now.
You pissed off a member of the cupcake patrol? Gold star for you my friend:) Tis an honor!
Apparently I also would have made a child cry. I think bringing a child into an argument to make the other person feel guilty about something that wasn’t even the point is cruel.
There should be a corollary to Godwin’s Law – whenever someone says “think of the children!” when the topic has nothing to do with children…
I can’t believe they used a child as an example. Ok, it really increases the integrity of a shop when their kid made it. Yeah, I love my daughter & let her craft with me. I also think she is an amazing 8 year old artist. Would I try to market her wares on Etsy? Hell no! It just sounds like mommy’s little sweatshop.
How are our kids ever to understand the pain of the world as functioning adults, if they are never made to cry as children?
Go stomp on some dollies.
If something I’m considering buying has been made by a child, whether it’s my iPod or a pair of earrings, I want to know it.
Also, children are surprisingly good at understanding that what they do is not the same as great art. Most of them recognize that they are still learning and that their effort is what is valued.
I make my children cry almost daily. If anything happens to me, you can come by and take my place.
I’ll take that offer! I was a camp counselor for 5 years, I’m amazing at upsetting children. (In the most loving way, of course.)
That was you! I defended you. (You can prolly guess who I am.) That thread was HORRIBLE– I was trying so hard to be reasonable and nothing but knives flying in every direction.
I love how the one women uses the fact that the economy is bad to justify her anything goes attitude to etsy. “The economy is bad it’s handmade if I say so shut up and buy it for a huge mark-up stupid buyer!”
Thank you! I tried really hard to stay civil, but I just gave up in the end. I don’t really think they ever actually got my point.
Besides, a lot of people started blaming the buyer for not realizing stuff was reselling and that’s worse than anything I said.
There are many good points that were mad in that thread that were just ignored. I think a few people have been accused of being resellers and they are just very sensitive or something. I DID NOT, think the thread would be so ~controversial~ ooooOOOooooOOOooo… man. I need to stop looking it’s like a train wreck.
I need to see this thread now.
It was rough and I wan’t very nice, but I was mad.
That thread made me furious! Seriously, do people who put premade charms onto premade chains really think they are handmaking something? Knitting is a skill, painting is a skill, quilting is a skill, metalsmithing is a skill. Hand assembling is a skill to, but only if we’re talking fine motor skills for four year olds.
And if we say putting something on a chain is ‘homemade’, then where does it stop? By allowing that they probably make it easier for resellers because they can hide behind the category of hand assembled.
hand made, not homemade.
Maybe I am just judgemental but, it seems the TRUE hand assembled craftsmen weren’t the ones screaming. It was the “I glue one mass produced item to another mass produced item and I therefore mass produce ‘hand assembled’ mass produced crap” types that were sreaming the loudest.
Yeah, the whole blaming the buyer if they don’t realize they are being ripped off is ridiculous. I get crazy requests from buyers asking for discounts that are just insane, because if you don’t do the craft you probably don’t know the real time and costs of production. If a seller is lying it’s totally the sellers fault, not the buyer. The idea that someone needs to research to buy legit handmade on etsy is kind of the point. They shouldn’t have to. And they wouldn’t have to if etsy cared at all about credibility and took resellers, junk on a chain, and outright lying sellers seriously. But as Dorishandmade proved, they really really don’t.
Caveat Emptor takes on a totally new meaning on Etsy. If anything, there should be a special Etsy version of it. (Crap, help me! I’m planning to translate shit into Latin to make fun of hipsters. God help me!)
Oooooo I wish that thread was still open. *gnashes teeth*
wow… i was even planing on making an etsy shop… then i read that thread.
my monocle just popped-out.
Oh wow, I read that whole thread. How infuriating! They just didn’t get the point!
When I was 12 I used to buy different beads at the local craft store and string them into necklaces and give them as gifts. They were nice little necklaces. If I were to make such necklaces today, I wouldn’t feel ashamed of selling them, but I wouldn’t be ashamed to say that I bought the beads either. Full disclosure and all.
But to lie about what was handmade and what wasn’t is dishonest! I don’t get the defensiveness of some of the idiots there. I really think that a lot of it stems from the realization that their contribution to creativity is barebones and they know it. I see the same thing go on with other crafts and art forms. They do things the lazy way and then get offended because to others, it makes a difference if something is done from scratch or not.
Thanks everyone! Being in that thread was a little like the twilight zone and for a minute I almost thought I was totally in the wrong about it.
And them I remember that Etsy is full of crazies and I snapped out of it.
You had a great point. What a bunch of priggish, self-righteous cunts. I would love to force feed them a bunch of those shitty plastic floral cabochons.
“I glue earring backs on buttons I buy at Walmart! Look at what an artist I am!”
Read the entire thread. I know when my mom told me she finally “discovered” Etsy I had to have a “talk” with her and tell her about the Etsy BUYER BEWARE policy. First my other is extremely intellegent but the poor woman doesn’t have an artistic or crafty bone in her body. I call it her craft-handicap. After explaining the issue of resellers and sketch “hand assemblers” she got it. And if she finds anything she’s thinking of buying she emails me and asks my opinion on it’s “authenticity”. Sadly most buyers are like my momma and get the shaft in these cases. Long story short, THANKS FOR STICKING UP FOR MY MOMMA AND ALL THE OTHER BUYERS OUT THERE LIKE HER!
Anytime! It’s just so depressing that we even have to stand up for people like that. Etsy shouldn’t be a place where you are afraid to shop.
Etsy apparently can’t tell the difference between reporting a shop and flaming, so I’d take it with a grain of salt.
Me big re-seller!
Me play joke!
Me leave Etsy on Love Boat!
I couldn’t channel the proper snark today…That just cracked me up
Vacation is translated into “I’m changing my store name as fast as I can”
This reminds me of a scene I observed in a Greek diner. The owner was fighting with the credit card machine, screaming a tirade in Greek, punctuated with the name of the card processing company.
My ex and I once tried to watch all of Twin Peaks in one go, but the only copy we could find had been recorded in Sweden, complete with commercials. The commercials all sounded very Swedish-Chef, complete with an occasional product name in English. They got funnier and funnier as sleep deprivation and DavidLynchitis set in. I can still make him laugh himself purple by saying “Sveurdy fleurdy geurdy COCA-COLA, börk börk börk!”
Was that the Marietta Diner by chance?!
No, it was where the Denny’s used to be off the Buford Highway connector. They’ve changed names, owners, and formats five times since then.
Thank you ChurchLady- I used Google translate… Slow boat to China? The slow boat from Etsy
I feel all better now.
lol “on vacation”
I’ve heard of people faking all sorts of shit just so they won’t be bothered by trolls anymore. And it almost never worked.
There’s no clever way to deal with trolls. They’re like cockroaches. You just have to step on them before they breed. *delete*!
Or bait them, if that’s your idea of a good time. I’ve seen some very funny troll-baiting threads, but I’m not good at it myself.
If she’s going to flounce, she ought to do it dressed like this:
Princess Cruise Line’s own April Lopez!
Maybe she’s in Reeducation Camp.
Is she going to be reetsycated?
I know I’m a horrible person because I just laughed obnoxiously loud at this.
I thought it was Camp Upcycle, where they turn trash resellers into money-generating, Etsy-approved, ‘handmade’ treasure.
I went there. We made lanyards.
Journals, exciting and new! Come buy one, we’re excpecting you to! Annnd handmade, by Dorishandmade…and her factory. Oh Love boat!…
Yeah, nice concept but…ya watch the show, then an hour later…yup, ya wanna watch it again! No longer is it “exciting and new.” A rather definite drawback, I’d say…
If you’re a certain age, the Love Boat theme song was the cue to get dressed for a night on the town. At ten o’clock Tattoo rang the bell to warn you it was time to get into your Trans Am and go clubbing.
I’m not of that age, but this is one of those moments when I feel like I really missed out on something.
Fantasy Island…I still have nightmares.
Da plane! Da Plane!
Oh Christ…that’s right..”SMILES everyone.. SMILES”.
In my defense…I WAS on drugs that entire decade.
Etsy: We hate clogged inboxes, too, but not enough to actually DO anything about it, so instead we just forward to /dev/null.
I ran Slackware 3.2 back when Slackware 3.2 was cool and owned a lot of surplus SPARC hardware over time, but never quite cared enough to collect the variety of exotic workstation hardware some of my friends did.
Of course, at least one of those friends is now CTO of an up-and-coming database company and I’m doing PHP crap for a living. I should’ve learned Erlang instead…
“I should’ve learned Erlang instead” will be the quote on my Club Fuckery mug for May. Even though this is not a Club Fuckery thread, you’ve captured the spirit perfectly. I applaud you.
I don’t remember the version of Slackware I started with; I mostly remember that in order to format the floppy to install it from, you had to already be running some version of Slackware or know someone who was, making it the Friendship Cake of Linux distros.
What the hell?! My real name IS Doris and this is an absolute travesty.
I say let the Etsodus begin.
Currently researching that. What are people’s thoughts/experiences regarding Zibbet?
I’ve seen that mentioned here before. I would also be interested to know what people think of it. It’s on my “to click” list, but I spend so much time on Regretsy that I haven’t done it yet.
I set up my own website. it’s a tiny bit more work, and (worse) doesn’t have a regretsy, but I sell more than I ever did on etsy, and there’s something to be said for that.
oh–it has a nice “pay when you sell” option instead of “Pay when you list” …that’d be nice.
I like zibbet, but for UK based shoppers Misi is better – prices in £!
“I set up my own website. it’s a tiny bit more work, and (worse) doesn’t have a regretsy..”
Mwah ha ha haaaaaa…. don’t we have a category called “Not Etsy, so sue me”???
Hehe. We’ll be waitin’ for ya, Kest!
I love it when Etsy clogs my inbox with yummy useless notifications, like when I’ve called out their creamy resellers with an itsy bitsy bit too much sugary zeal.
<3 <3 <3
What, no “funky fun”?
The best part about Love Boat was watching Fantasy Island afterward. I imagine DorisHandmade taking her vacation on Fantasy Island, getting in touch with her inner reseller, wondering why it’s not selling…
Love Boat my ass. She’s been living on Fantasy Island, where even the talentless can become bestsellers simply by buying cheap stuff to resell. And if somebody gets snotty about it, Roark sends Tattoo to say, “Da beech! Da beech! We said no calling out!” and kick them in the knee.
“Da FLOUNCE Da FLOUNCE !!”
Why not just have her stinking resale shop on ebay like everyone else… Promote the stuff as mass-produced-”hand-crafted”-made by children-slave-labor-in-filthy-horrible-conditions-in-a-third-world-country-while destroying-the rain-forrest-faux-chic.
And mark it up to $5 a piece as opposed to her laughable and oh-so-greedy $25 (please..help! am I selling for too much munnee?) b.s.
And still make a hefty profit.
while being at least a little honest and maybe hanging on to some thin shred of dignity
that’s the best suggestion i’ve heard yet.
Thanks… I wasn’t able to even think straight when I posted that — I was dealing with AT&T U-verse…
the best part of your suggestion is pointing out that there already is a place for these resellers – ebay. and therefore there is no need to tolerate them amongst decent folk!
We should try setting up a shop that just flat-out says in the shop announcement that it’s a resale shop. See how long it stays up before Etsy does anything about it.
It’ll probably be the best selling store Etsy has ever seen. And all our innocent thoughts about the world will be crushed.
Like “The Producers”. Springtime for Etsy, anyone?
I’m in. I have a ton of crap left over from Oriental Trading that I bought for a party at work. Gotta get rid of it!!!!
Name the shop, Blatent Resellers!
there already is a shop like that. it’s called ebay.
I love how people are selling this stuff as “Made in Tibet” when it is usually made in Hong Kong or other parts of China, which ARE NOT TIBET.
Sorry…I get a little pissy about the Chinese occupation of Tibet still
Rock on, tinkerjenn.
I’m Tibetan Buddhist
Why shouldn’t you get pissy? It’s EVIL.
As this is an Etsy production Gopher is being played by a real gopher – in a fish suit (URL’s brother)
I smiled until I saw the money fan….Then I snorted to the point of choking a bit.
Gods. I love you.
Being on vacation is not the same as having your store closed down, by the way. I wonder if Knickey is on the case?
no probably just the monkey temp they hired or the chicken used to pick the specials of the day…
The only case she’s on is the case of Mello Yello.
Every time I see that name, I pronounce it like “Grease” — I got a hickey from Kenickie.
Those notebooks are one of a kind,
Like dip dadip dadip doowop da doobee doo
Yeah…I know. But it COULD mean that they shut her down while she has a chance to prove she is handmade.
Or…er….ok..that sort of attention is clearly too much to expect of Admin.
I say she shut it down that way before they could, and has reopened with another name already!
I think Rob White was probably busy live-blogging Snooki’s appearance on WWE Raw.*
*I’m telling you, you really HAVE to follow him on Twitter.
Besides….long haired men who wear fedoras are inherently creepy. It’s a Known Fact!
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
What is with the password protected posts? I can’t view them no matter how many times I put in my password and/or login??
CURSE YOU FACEBOOK !!!!
make sure you are not copying and pasting, and the PW field is also Cap Sensitive.
There. I have done something nice today.
It would be worth it to see what kind of communication Etsy has with these resellers. We know they make each other a ton of money, and it seems like the bigger the reseller, the longer it takes to get them knocked down. I wonder if there is a process involved. It would be cool to infiltrate and see if Etsy tells them to lay low, come back with a new name, or just wait til things cool off. Someone needs to infiltrate.
“So Crease, what do you do for a living?”
“Well, I used to be in computers, but I left that field for Estyonage. The pay’s not as good, but I get to make my own hours…”
And the spy theme song we’ll make you is a nice perk.
If you do a good job, Donald Trump might send you to Hawaii. It’s gonna be `uge.
I hope the sequel is named “DorisHandjob’s Corner Store”.
But y’all don’t hate now, cos that’s not right. Go give someone a hug, while trying not to choke back tears that your lovely and truely handmade things do not sell as well as steampunk octopi with one bead added or Antique Hello Kitty watch lockets… Sigh.
That is just how any Cult operates.
You get ‘Love’ when you agree with everything the leaders say, and you get shunned for telling the truth.
…trampling on feelings and anger go together like turkey and stuffing…
Well, uh, yeah. And they are just as delicious. Without any calories!
It’s just a three hour cruise, right?
Oh, crap, that was Gilligan’s Island. Nevermind.
When Etsy shuts down a shop, it doesn’t say on vacation. So, she did this herself, content team still riding on the razors with mustache necklaces. I think they are just keeping calm and carrying on over there.
I kind of pictured her more as Carol Channing…
wow. man oh man. lady oh lady. there are some really really unhappy and sensitive folks out there on that thread, and wow. I see Sadie Ann, after reading the WHOLE thing that there is a lack of integrity….it went so south with the lynching word. just aweful. I would get ugly too….and just might. NOW DorisHndmade on the loveboat slow boat to China, is enough to make all that crap and blech go away.
In my oh so humble opinion.
DorisHandmade says “HELP!!!!!!What is wrong with me?”
Take a hint…
我的媽和她的瘋狂的外甥都! Can’t we get her gone for good? 笨天生的一堆肉。
(I heart Firefly.)
Doris has gone on vacation to China to study the venerable art of handmade journals. The fact that she was seen, bags full, at the factory that makes them is a TOTAL co-incidence. Excuse me, I must go and catch the pig that flew past my window.
You must be logged in to post a comment.
The term "Etsy" is a trademark of Etsy, Inc. This site is not affiliated with Etsy, Inc.