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10 Things I Can’t Believe Someone Bought


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377 comments on 10 Things I Can’t Believe Someone Bought

  1. Knitty Knaughty
    April 7, 2011 at 9:38 am

    I would buy two out of the ten?

    Thumb up Thumb down +43

    • BatShitKrazyGlue
      April 7, 2011 at 9:42 am

      Which two?

      Thumb up Thumb down +18

      • ImNotSteamPunk
        April 7, 2011 at 9:59 am

        Don’t know about Knitty Knaughty but I’d buy the cat clock (& break off the cat). I guess that’s only one I’m willing to part with money for.

        Thumb up Thumb down +50

        • amaranthphantom
          April 7, 2011 at 11:00 am

          I would probably buy the cat clock as long as the clock part actually works. Also sorta thought the Mario plate was kinda cute… But a wildcat FETUS? FURRLZ?? This site is damn crazy.

          Thumb up Thumb down +31

        • MmeZeeZee
          April 7, 2011 at 11:12 am

          I could totally see buying the wildcat fetus for a homeschool unit or something. Or for a kid that was really interested in biology.

          The cat clock I would consider if it were $2.

          Thumb up Thumb down +31

        • anthropochick
          April 7, 2011 at 3:35 pm

          I was homeschooled- and I can’t say we ever felt the need for a cat fetus in a jar… But possibly that’s why I’m a social scientist and not a ‘real’ scientist?

          And cmon – HK will buy a hideous commemorative Obama plate at CVS, but the Mario plate is a mystery? As both an Italian-American and a gamer, I am shocked. Shocked!

          (Am I just not noticing something obvious? Like misspellings, or unwanted homoerotic incestuous overtones??)

          Thumb up Thumb down +25

        • RigaToni
          April 7, 2011 at 4:24 pm

          Agreed. Neither is the most exquisite art piece on Etsy, but they’re handmade and worth the price asked. The handwriting on the Mario plate is poorly done, but the actual (traced?) graphics are kind of close to what they should look like.

          The clock I don’t hate with or without the cat attached. I almost want to go pop open a few hard drives and buy clock faces to make one. Does that make me Regretsiful? Or Whimsicley Fucktastic?

          Thumb up Thumb down +37

      • lilynymph
        April 7, 2011 at 10:04 am

        my money’s on the rat head and the unicorn horn.

        Thumb up Thumb down +34

        • Holden Back
          April 7, 2011 at 5:22 pm

          Together on the same head they would be quite something.

          Thumb up Thumb down +39

      • RaggedyMe
        April 7, 2011 at 10:04 pm

        I’d actually buy the cat-in-a-jar. But I’m a lover of medical science, specifically fetal development and birth. I just think it would be really cool to see up close.

        I’d also buy the clock if it were done in a non-cat theme.

        I’d buy the wings for kiddo if they didn’t have the beads and junk attached. They look like they’d hold up better than the stupid nylon ones.

        Thumb up Thumb down +7

        • ImNotSteamPunk
          April 8, 2011 at 10:02 am

          On that theme, I’m making ones with duct tape. I shall post a photo, if anyone wants to see it, after I’m done…

          Thumb up Thumb down +7

        • Ladyamericana
          March 22, 2012 at 11:38 am

          I like how you hate cats that you don’t like a cute (well, trying to be at least) cat-themed clock but want to decorate with dead cats ;)

          To be fair though I love cats and totally want that fetus but that’s just because I love fetuses

          Thumb up Thumb down 0

    • Knitty Knaughty
      April 7, 2011 at 12:15 pm

      yes DEFINATEly must have the cat clock….

      and must admit to liking the spats…ive crocheted something similar…heh

      Thumb up Thumb down +4

      • fancyskants
        April 7, 2011 at 5:42 pm

        Yes, I also think they’re “to hott” for words.

        Thumb up Thumb down +6

  2. SeanD
    April 7, 2011 at 9:39 am

    Those boots are not steampunk.

    They’re steampuke.

    And wow, there’s a whole lot of things just begging for a “What The Fuck?!” in this post…

    Thumb up Thumb down +61

    • SnarkBite
      April 7, 2011 at 10:17 am

      Not steampunk, gothic, lolita, Victorian, Vampire or anything close to resembling attractive!

      Thumb up Thumb down +23

    • vulturelet
      April 7, 2011 at 10:53 am

      I almost steampuked when I saw them. Funny, the preserved fetal kitten didn’t bother me, but those spats? Absolutely can’t look at them while eating.

      Thumb up Thumb down +63

      • knittygritty
        April 7, 2011 at 11:02 am

        vulturelet, our avatars are so different but so similarity!

        And I don’t see a hoodoo certification on that sergeant’s grave dirt.

        Thumb up Thumb down +63

    • stephsparkle
      April 7, 2011 at 1:50 pm

      I think they would look great with my boyfriend’s renaissance costume. It’s a little weird anyway.

      Thumb up Thumb down +5

  3. cottongodzilla
    April 7, 2011 at 9:40 am

    however they got the marketing to find their target niche, i want in on it… before i have to resort to selling aborted wildcats too.

    Thumb up Thumb down +23

    • knittygritty
      April 7, 2011 at 11:07 am

      Fetal cat? Dress it up like Lion-O and we can talk.

      Thumb up Thumb down +18

  4. BatShitKrazyGlue
    April 7, 2011 at 9:41 am

    The clock’s not so bad.

    Thumb up Thumb down +105

    • evacooper
      April 7, 2011 at 9:59 am

      yeah only the cat part is…

      Thumb up Thumb down +20

    • PalmettoCactus
      April 7, 2011 at 1:35 pm

      I’ll admit the clock is kind of cute – the dirt from a WWII Soldier’s grave kind of ticks me off, though.

      Thumb up Thumb down +61

      • AriaCouture
        April 7, 2011 at 2:30 pm

        Me too. That’s so disrespectful. For those who truly believe dirt from a grave holds protective powers, they’re not going to sell it for profit on etsy. If I was that man’s family, I’d be pissed someone’s trying to profit on his death.

        Thumb up Thumb down +57

        • fancyskants
          April 7, 2011 at 5:46 pm

          Aria, do you really think that didn’t come from her back yard?

          Really.

          O.K., maybe her front yard.

          Thumb up Thumb down +25

        • Dynomoose
          March 22, 2012 at 4:38 pm

          Of course they would sell it on etsy. Hoodoo isn’t a religion. It’s a collection of practices to make things happen. Even if the thing you want to have happen is to make money from selling it.

          Thumb up Thumb down +3

      • KITSUNE (=^w^=)///>
        April 7, 2011 at 3:19 pm

        +1 I like the cat clock too, but stealing grave soil is not only gross, but wrong. (If everyone did it, there would be exposed bodies everywhere for lack of soil… :S Besides, if someone really believes in grave soil power, don’t they also believe in hauntings? I’m not sure what angers dead spirits, but in movies, at least, disturbing their graves always qualifies…)

        Thumb up Thumb down +42

        • somebidder
          April 7, 2011 at 7:23 pm

          jesus keerist, I am SO embarrassed to be from Michigan after seeing the witchy-poo sellers items.

          i’m not going anywhere near the west side of the state for a while, thank god.

          Thumb up Thumb down +8

  5. rachelnyc
    April 7, 2011 at 9:41 am

    Etsy: the super happy creamy yummy rat-killing, fetus-hoarding, grave-desecrating wonderland of your fluffiest unicorn dreams!!!!

    (yeesh)

    Thumb up Thumb down +199

    • hippiejo74
      April 7, 2011 at 10:22 am

      Desecrating a grave of someone is a super shitty thing to do. I hope they are cursed for their stupidness! Asshat.

      Thumb up Thumb down +88

      • Church Lady Brought a Hot Dish
        April 7, 2011 at 10:49 am

        Oh, I am sure she respectfully DANCED on it before harvesting the grave.

        Thumb up Thumb down +54

      • loganbacon
        April 7, 2011 at 1:40 pm

        I’ve done rubbings of cool markers and we’ve visited a shit ton of (really old) graveyards in Europe, near cathedrals and ruins and such…but you leave things as you found it, as in DON’T TAKE SHIT AND SELL IT.

        Thumb up Thumb down +60

    • fancyskants
      April 7, 2011 at 5:49 pm

      Rachel, you better copyright or trademark or somehow PROTECT that phrase before Etsy steals it as their new slogan.

      Thumb up Thumb down +5

    • fancyskants
      April 7, 2011 at 5:53 pm

      Rachel, you’d better copyright that phrase before Etsy steals it for their new slogan. I know I’d shop a place that used it!

      Thumb up Thumb down +9

  6. magnusjournals
    April 7, 2011 at 9:42 am

    The fact that the lady with the unicorn horn looks kinda sweaty is making me wonder what else she might have been using it for.

    gross.

    Thumb up Thumb down +90

    • lemon_bombs
      April 7, 2011 at 10:15 am

      Thumb up Thumb down +166

      • Dynomoose
        April 7, 2011 at 10:33 am

        A friend of mine bought a weird unicorn horn stap-on last year. I wish I could find the photos she posted.

        Thumb up Thumb down +31

        • Cindy-Lou Hoohoo
          April 8, 2011 at 1:47 am

          Was it one of these? I couldn’t find any pictures of someone wearing a unicorn strap-on, but I did find an etsy shop that sells unicorn strap-ons. (and tentacle dildos) Whipspider’s Etsy Shop I love how they call it “Art with Benefits.”

          Thumb up Thumb down +4

        • Cindy-Lou Hoohoo
          April 8, 2011 at 1:49 am

          Goddamnit, the picture worked in the preview.

          Thumb up Thumb down +1

        • Cindy-Lou Hoohoo
          April 8, 2011 at 1:50 am

          Aw, the hell with it. Just click the link in my comment above, if you care.

          Thumb up Thumb down +2

      • Stretch65 is back and still not even remotely Steampunk
        April 7, 2011 at 12:22 pm

        “look at me I’m horny !” ( facepalm facepalm)

        Thumb up Thumb down +38

        • sheltiepitbullfun
          April 7, 2011 at 10:17 pm

          Don’t facepalm wearing the unicorn horn or you’d impale yourself!

          Thumb up Thumb down +28

      • craptastic
        April 7, 2011 at 4:21 pm

        How do you post images? I REALLY want to share my Sid Vicious Pot Holder Glove!

        Thumb up Thumb down +6

        • MissWalstra
          April 7, 2011 at 5:42 pm

          Type in without the spaces.

          If you’re using a photohosting website like Photobucket or Imagehost, they’ll often have the code there for you to copy and paste.

          Thumb up Thumb down +1

        • MissWalstra
          April 7, 2011 at 5:44 pm

          Alright, preview doesn’t actually give an accurate preview of the post. Let’s see if this works:

          Type in U+003C IMG SRC=”filename” U+003E without the spaces.

          Thumb up Thumb down 0

        • MissWalstra
          April 7, 2011 at 5:46 pm

          I give up. :( ya use the little less than/greater than signs. I need some Arbour Mist…

          Thumb up Thumb down +5

      • Cindy-Lou Hoohoo
        April 8, 2011 at 1:52 am

        Maybe she’s sweaty ’cause she just finished giving someone a Hungry Unicorn

        Thumb up Thumb down +4

  7. Combustion
    April 7, 2011 at 9:43 am

    That cat clock is the holy shit.

    Thumb up Thumb down +55

  8. I was young and crafty once
    April 7, 2011 at 9:43 am

    If I saw anyone walking with those jeans flapping between their legs, I’d look for a hidden camera…

    Thumb up Thumb down +65

  9. AholicRambler
    April 7, 2011 at 9:44 am

    My cat threw those boots up last week.

    Thumb up Thumb down +118

  10. Crossbow
    April 7, 2011 at 9:44 am

    I’m trying to decide which of those makes the least sense. I think it’s the wings. I wouldn’t know they were supposed to be wings if the description didn’t say so. The other stuff, I can at least tell what it’s supposed to be.

    Thumb up Thumb down +39

  11. Dyevochka
    April 7, 2011 at 9:45 am

    Wait, I’m the only one who’s excited to have found a reputable source for graveyard dirt?

    Thumb up Thumb down +154

    • Princess Buzzkill Crying Glitter Eagle
      April 7, 2011 at 11:24 am

      Don’t you mean “reputable”? I didn’t see a Certificate of Authenticity mentioned in the listing.

      Thumb up Thumb down +15

    • here_now11
      April 7, 2011 at 11:30 am

      The thing is, I can’t help but think that if I ever really needed graveyard dirt for something – like, if my life or the lives of my loved ones depended on it – then I think I’d just go to the graveyard to get some, not buy it on Etsy and wait for it to be shipped.

      Not that I think anyone ever really needs graveyard dirt for anything, but that’s another matter entirely.

      Thumb up Thumb down +56

      • knittygritty
        April 7, 2011 at 2:56 pm

        Don’t be silly. Graveyard dirt is like Vintage Dust.

        Thumb up Thumb down +19

      • blackgermanshepherd
        April 7, 2011 at 3:22 pm

        When I need graveyard dirt, I just smash up some oreo cookies…IF, you catch my drift…

        Thumb up Thumb down +13

  12. Corpsegrinder
    April 7, 2011 at 9:45 am

    I would totes buy that clock.

    Thumb up Thumb down +35

  13. ZombiesFreakMeOut
    April 7, 2011 at 9:45 am

    Holah! i want the luxuri style so i can go outh to dinerr, i will bringe the Maryo plate! then i will waer my wings and split genes to the groceri store because i need to feed my dead mouse and fetus in a jar! they like it when i waer th unicorn horn and throw dyrt all over my living roome! oops! the mother board cat is teling me its time to go eat some brokoly!

    this is all bullshit.

    Thumb up Thumb down +98

    • Dances With Lasagna
      March 22, 2012 at 8:53 pm

      That hurt my eyes to read that.

      Although I agree with you 101%.

      Thumb up Thumb down 0

  14. Rad Bromance
    April 7, 2011 at 9:45 am

    If only the mom helped with the Spanish.

    Thumb up Thumb down +87

    • pplrdum
      April 7, 2011 at 9:49 am

      She got a little Yiddish on her Spanish.

      Thumb up Thumb down +120

    • prynsesscraftsy
      April 7, 2011 at 11:05 am

      I thought she was trying for “Hollah” and missed an L. Her version is much more idiotic.

      Thumb up Thumb down +79

    • HaydnSihk
      April 7, 2011 at 11:39 am

      somehow i’m imagining the way she practices her spanish at home sounding like peggy from ‘king of the hill’…

      Thumb up Thumb down +19

      • kooyla
        April 9, 2011 at 10:16 pm

        OMG Me too! She needs to work on her “esPANol”

        Thumb up Thumb down +3

    • AriaCouture
      April 7, 2011 at 2:34 pm

      “Definately” would have made it better….

      Thumb up Thumb down +6

  15. Culinarychiq
    April 7, 2011 at 9:47 am

    If the seller put a little more effort into the Italian plate, like added some more characters along the rim, I’d be tempted to buy it. The Holah sign made me laugh and think the seller must really love her Jewish bread! When I realized it was supposed to be Spanish it made me sad again (I can only imagine what her mother’s grade was). The cat clock is pretty cool but would I buy it? Nah. Finally, nothing says honoring a fallen decorated soldier like robbing his grave of dirt and selling it online:-/

    Thumb up Thumb down +44

    • Princess Buzzkill Crying Glitter Eagle
      April 7, 2011 at 11:26 am

      that’s challa bread. The “ch” is the pronounced as if you are bringing some phlegm up from your throat.

      Thumb up Thumb down +17

      • The Blue Kraken
        April 7, 2011 at 11:51 am

        and that’s the best explanation ive seen for pronouncing it… i tried to explain this to a teenage girl with only two brain cells to rub together at a bakery.. she kept saying “jolla” like it was a fucking jolly rancher .. the bread company who put the label there ALSO misspelled it with a J.. i dont know who i was angrier with when i left. tarded management, the shitty education system, or teenagers who think they know anything.

        Thumb up Thumb down +20

      • Stretch65 is back and still not even remotely Steampunk
        April 7, 2011 at 12:25 pm

        How much does the Challa cost?!

        Thumb up Thumb down +8

      • Culinarychiq
        April 7, 2011 at 12:52 pm

        I know Princess, I figured whatever she was trying to say she was doing it wrong LOL Never in a million years did I think she was going for Spanish until I read the description, it still makes me sad;)

        Thumb up Thumb down +16

        • RigaToni
          April 7, 2011 at 4:28 pm

          I had exactly the same thought process. Sad that I came up with three or four possibilities before reading the description.

          Thumb up Thumb down +7

      • frogprof
        March 22, 2012 at 10:50 am

        I always told my French classes to pronounce the guttural “r” as if you’re a cat trying to hock up a hairball.

        Thumb up Thumb down +2

    • The Blue Kraken
      April 7, 2011 at 11:39 am

      i thought the same thing …even if it’s the braided Jewish bread i know and love it’s STILL spelled wrong. (but at least if she READS it though she’d pronounce it correctly (if she can even read))

      Thumb up Thumb down +8

    • RaggedyMe
      April 7, 2011 at 10:11 pm

      Did anyone else notice that Luigi seemed to have a couple of extra fingers? I could have sworn he had the normal four for animated characters….

      Thumb up Thumb down +5

  16. unseeliepixie
    April 7, 2011 at 9:47 am

    There’s an awful lot of trust involved in some of these postings… How do I *know* that’s a wild cat and not just a domestic cat fetus, hm? I’ve got an awful lot of skepticism going on, so I’m going to have to require some item of proof, say a DNA test or voucher from a curator of mammals.

    Second, there is a graveyard directly in back of my house and we’re right down the road from a Naval Base! It should work if I combine the dirt, right? Look for my Etsy shop to open up soon!

    Thumb up Thumb down +58

    • anaceofkidneys
      April 7, 2011 at 11:13 am

      I peeked at her other entries and it seems that by “wildcat” she means “feral cat”. Wildcat just sounds sexier, I guess.

      I had a collection of kitten fetuses when I was a kid. They came from cats who were spayed while pregnant. That’s where I’m thinking she probably got this one.

      Thumb up Thumb down +12

      • Rana
        April 7, 2011 at 11:41 am

        You had a *collection* of kitten fetuses? Wasn’t one enough?

        Thumb up Thumb down +70

        • milkshakesthecat
          April 7, 2011 at 1:19 pm

          Wasn’t the thought of one enough to put you off, moar leik? D:

          Thumb up Thumb down +7

        • anaceofkidneys
          April 7, 2011 at 6:12 pm

          Technically they were my mom’s (she’s a vet, and she would take them to career days at schools). I just played with them. I guess I wasn’t as easily grossed out as most people because I spent so much time watching surgery, etc.

          Thumb up Thumb down +19

      • Moose
        April 7, 2011 at 4:57 pm

        That is damn creepy..

        I can’t help but think of the effed up movie I saw on Sci-Fi where some lady kept all of her miscarried children in jars, gave them names and had stories about their lives and professions.

        Thumb up Thumb down +18

        • Seraphim.Rhode
          April 8, 2011 at 6:25 am

          Saddly Moose, there are people like in real life. I found one of their blogs once. I wish I still had the link.

          Thumb up Thumb down +6

  17. RuthX
    April 7, 2011 at 9:50 am

    If anyone “respectfully” takes dirt from my grave to sell on Etsy, I will haunt a bitch.

    Thumb up Thumb down +252

    • SeanD
      April 7, 2011 at 9:58 am

      Besides, hasn’t that poor decorated WWII sergeant suffered enough already?

      Thumb up Thumb down +78

      • A Side Order of Derp
        April 7, 2011 at 11:20 am

        They obviously didn’t tell him that serving his country means having your grave desecrated for an online flea market.

        I’d give him another medal.

        Thumb up Thumb down +15

      • loganbacon
        April 7, 2011 at 1:46 pm

        HTF does SHE know what kind of man he was? There are plenty of complete schmucks who fought and got wounded. You can respect that someone served, but it was the service, not sainthood.

        Thumb up Thumb down +20

  18. TheBeastWhatSqueaks
    April 7, 2011 at 9:50 am

    Jeans with slits up the sides? The evil cousin of skants, perhaps?

    Thumb up Thumb down +56

    • I was young and crafty once
      April 7, 2011 at 9:55 am

      Yes, they are called “evening gants”

      Thumb up Thumb down +66

    • Moose
      April 7, 2011 at 4:59 pm

      This makes me wonder if it’s possible to make reverse ass-less chaps.

      Can we have a wtf-pants contest?

      Thumb up Thumb down +26

  19. grimilkincat
    April 7, 2011 at 9:50 am

    I am a bad person because I TOTALLY dig on that cat clock.

    Thumb up Thumb down +72

    • RigaToni
      April 7, 2011 at 4:29 pm

      If loving that cat clock is wrong, I don’t want to be right.

      Thumb up Thumb down +34

  20. evacooper
    April 7, 2011 at 9:52 am

    Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

    Thumb up Thumb down -20

  21. milkshakesthecat
    April 7, 2011 at 9:54 am

    Oh man oh god oh god oh man oh man oh god

    that fetus

    why.

    Thumb up Thumb down +13

    • SeanD
      April 7, 2011 at 9:55 am

      So that you can create your own shrine, fetish, or totem.

      O_O

      Thumb up Thumb down +30

      • Steampunk Octopus
        April 7, 2011 at 10:36 am

        Or fascinator.

        Thumb up Thumb down +61

        • here_now11
          April 7, 2011 at 11:33 am

          Cloning, my friends. If you’re doing a little home-clonging in your basement, you need a fresh supply of DNA once in a while.

          Thumb up Thumb down +21

  22. BaconPony
    April 7, 2011 at 9:55 am

    I have never seen anyone wearing a unicorn horn at a renaissance festival.

    Fortunately. Because dude, wtf?

    Thumb up Thumb down +70

    • lemon_bombs
      April 7, 2011 at 10:02 am

      Also, the first time I looked at Minnie Pearl in her fancy split jeans, I thought she had four legs. Nothing says HOT like extra, dangling limbs!

      Thumb up Thumb down +93

      • lemon_bombs
        April 7, 2011 at 10:03 am

        …that was not supposed to be a reply. \/\/hatever!

        Thumb up Thumb down +6

    • TheSheep
      April 7, 2011 at 11:06 am

      I haven’t either, but I know a guy who does quite well with devil horns, so the unicorn thing probably exists somewhere. Not very interesting work though.

      Thumb up Thumb down +11

    • DecoupageDonut
      April 7, 2011 at 11:11 am

      Oh, I have though. Ren Faires are like “Etsy: The Live Show” and are the best people watching on earth. Even better than Walmart.

      Thumb up Thumb down +69

      • Flutterguy
        April 7, 2011 at 1:00 pm

        There needs to be a blog for ‘People of Renfaires’. Goodfolke of Renfaire, maybe.

        Thumb up Thumb down +58

        • sheltiepitbullfun
          April 7, 2011 at 10:31 pm

          I can see the downside–there aren’t the convenient aisles to hide behind and the exit is half a mile away. People at the Ren Faire might stab you with their swords if they figure out what you’re up to and don’t want unflattering photos taken and put on the interwebz.

          Thumb up Thumb down +7

    • stephsparkle
      April 7, 2011 at 1:53 pm

      We had not one but TWO unicorns on the same day at the faire down here. On another note, we also had two minotaurs.

      Thumb up Thumb down +15

      • Contrary
        April 7, 2011 at 10:11 pm

        I thought your comment said you saw two centaurs at first, and I was very impressed. minotaurs? no so much.

        Thumb up Thumb down +3

  23. oneetsyreselleraday
    April 7, 2011 at 9:56 am

    I thought the cat clock was cool too!

    Everything else… what the what??

    Thumb up Thumb down +41

  24. lemon_bombs
    April 7, 2011 at 9:58 am

    Those boots look like the wearer painted her shins with glue and rolled around in the roadkill and crap on the side of the road.

    Thumb up Thumb down +55

    • gingerslap
      April 7, 2011 at 10:25 am

      Let’s hope there isn’t a fetal wildcat specimen stuck somewhere in the fur.

      Thumb up Thumb down +45

      • lemon_bombs
        April 7, 2011 at 2:20 pm

        Can’t be sure unless we see the other side of the boots.

        Frankly, I’m afraid if I go to the listing to see if there was a reverse view, I might throw up.

        Thumb up Thumb down +10

    • Captain Emo
      April 7, 2011 at 11:04 am

      And there’s something wrong with using that method? If painting my shins with glue and rolling around in roadside refuse is wrong… I don’t wanna be right…

      Thumb up Thumb down +40

  25. kittynaed
    April 7, 2011 at 9:58 am

    the clock is rather awesome, I think.

    Dead cats an grave dirt? Not so much.

    Thumb up Thumb down +44

  26. upscumbag
    April 7, 2011 at 9:59 am

    At first I thought “Holah” was a misspelling of “Holla!” As in, holla if you think this wooden sign is the shit!

    And it is shit, because psh, I could do better than an 11-year old.

    Thumb up Thumb down +81

    • tinydancer
      April 7, 2011 at 10:44 am

      I thought that, too! Now that I know it’s misspelled Spanish, I want to mispronounce it, too. “Hoe-la!”

      Thumb up Thumb down +18

  27. toku
    April 7, 2011 at 10:00 am

    That cat clock! I actually like it! But maybe that’s from exposure to everything else on the list.

    Laughing so hard at the dirt. Funny how you can tell how kind and noble someone’s spirit is just from looking at their grave!

    Thumb up Thumb down +50

    • Cindy-Lou Hoohoo
      April 8, 2011 at 1:55 am

      I like it too. I wouldn’t buy it, but I can see why someone would. The other things though. Oy.

      Thumb up Thumb down 0

  28. DamnitsGlam
    April 7, 2011 at 10:04 am

    P.T. Barnum was right.

    Thumb up Thumb down +60

    • frankenmouse
      April 7, 2011 at 11:45 am

      Interesting fact: Barnum actually never said that. It was said by his competitor,David Hannum, in reference to Barnum’s customers during the Cardiff Giant shenanigans and has since been incorrectly attributed to Barnum.

      I don’t know why I felt a need to tell you that.

      Thumb up Thumb down +11

      • ImNotSteamPunk
        April 8, 2011 at 10:12 am

        Frankenmouse its because you’re a geek. Welcome to the club. I’m your chapter president. Glad to meet you. Adult beverages & cookies are available at the back of the room. I had to repress the urge to correct that quote.

        Thumb up Thumb down +8

  29. SoupSandwich
    April 7, 2011 at 10:07 am

    When I first saw the HOLAH thing and had not read the description, I thought it was supposed to be “Holla!” (like the urban slang). As in, “Hang your coat all up in dis shizzle, dawg!”

    I don’t know what any of that even means, but it makes about as much sense as her Spanish.

    Thumb up Thumb down +41

  30. whatisthisidonteven
    April 7, 2011 at 10:09 am

    I uh, I like the cat clock…

    Thumb up Thumb down +21

  31. Dynomoose
    April 7, 2011 at 10:10 am

    I would buy two of the items. Maybe three.

    Thumb up Thumb down +6

  32. aberline
    April 7, 2011 at 10:10 am

    I actually kind of like the dead rat fascinator. That’s the most attractively mounted rat head I’ve ever seen.

    Thumb up Thumb down +59

    • TangoPig
      April 7, 2011 at 11:07 am

      Agreed! If it hadn’t already sold I might get it for my next Gothla … Not for the grocery store, though. It would clash with my fairy-hoarder-princess wings.

      Thumb up Thumb down +27

      • u2m3
        April 7, 2011 at 1:35 pm

        OMG! I’ve been looking for a pair of fairy-hoarder princess wings for years! Where did you buy yours?

        Thumb up Thumb down +8

    • prynsesscraftsy
      April 7, 2011 at 11:09 am

      I have to say, I agree. It is the only mounted rat head (I don’t count the rat rug we saw a few days ago) I’ve seen, but it is the most attractive.

      Thumb up Thumb down +19

    • Black Market Beagle
      April 7, 2011 at 4:11 pm

      It is the most attractively mounted rat head ever! I want that. I do.

      Thumb up Thumb down +5

  33. jerseycow6
    April 7, 2011 at 10:16 am

    We had those preserved animals in my 6th grade science classroom. The teacher used to have us take them to use for tracing circles when we had to draw anything involving a microscope. They were also useful for freaking out the 5th graders.

    Thumb up Thumb down +24

    • prynsesscraftsy
      April 7, 2011 at 11:10 am

      We had a two-headed pig fetus in one of my classrooms in high school. It was pretty interesting.

      Thumb up Thumb down +13

      • jerseycow6
        April 7, 2011 at 4:45 pm

        Cool! I didn’t take earth science because I was taking Bio, but I’m told the 9th grade earth science teacher used to “borrow” the bio2 class’s fetal pigs and walk around the classroom with them.

        Thumb up Thumb down +2

      • AnEnchantedNotion
        April 7, 2011 at 6:41 pm

        We had a two headed 8 footed generally very deformed pig fetus in a jar in Biology class in high school. Our teacher kept it locked in his office. And said hi to it every day. And introduced it to the class on the first day of school each year.

        There were some rumors of him doing some pig-jar petting after hours as well. He wasn’t a very popular teacher.

        Thumb up Thumb down +10

        • RaggedyMe
          April 7, 2011 at 10:25 pm

          Ah! I’m giggling hysterically right now because that reminded me of a story from high school.
          Two of my friends offered to help our bio teacher out after school one day.
          One of the friends “tim” was cleaning a closet while the other was doing some filing.
          Suddenly, there was a big bang and Tim started screaming from inside the closet. The other friend ran in and discovered Tim standing calf-deep in a pile of vacuum-packed, hairless, dead cats!
          Turns out, they were dissection specimens for the advanced bio class, but it still freaked him out to go in that closet again!

          Thumb up Thumb down +9

        • prynsesscraftsy
          April 7, 2011 at 11:07 pm

          I’m pretty sure there were extra hooves in there, too. Mr. Oster was very well liked. During class, if we finished early, we got to go up to the school farm and help take care of the animals. I wasn’t in 4H or FFA, but I love animals and hard work that I don’t have to do, so it was a treat for me.

          Thumb up Thumb down +2

      • Contrary
        April 7, 2011 at 10:18 pm

        that’s actually awesome. I didn’t have a lot of fun preserved stuff in high school bio, but gradate school biology labs?! soo muuuch coooool stuuufff (doesn’t the university know that they could be making a killing putting this stuff up on etsy?)

        Thumb up Thumb down +2

      • yecats
        April 9, 2011 at 12:49 am

        We had a 4-legged chick, and two-faced kitten. Oh the hours I spent staring at them in biology…

        Thumb up Thumb down +1

    • milkshakesthecat
      April 7, 2011 at 11:55 am

      I’m 23 and that would freak me out, dude. Dead things, ew.

      Thumb up Thumb down +11

  34. pincushions
    April 7, 2011 at 10:21 am

    I’ll admit to liking the rat fascinator. I have a thing for taxidermy, fur stoles with the faces still on, etc. Then again, I’m a loon.

    Thumb up Thumb down +16

    • butts lol
      April 7, 2011 at 10:49 am

      So which one won, the cat fascinator or the rat fascinator? I’m tempted to start a whole fascinating menagerie!

      Thumb up Thumb down +8

  35. BatShitKrazyGlue
    April 7, 2011 at 10:23 am

    After hours of careful and painstaking research (ie I pulled it out of my ass), I figure out exactly which “very kind, noble spirit, that would give up anything to help defend what is right and honorable” was buried under that dirt.

    Thumb up Thumb down +45

    • BatShitKrazyGlue
      April 7, 2011 at 10:31 am

      Figured, not figure. As you can see, I put hours of careful and painstaking research into my proofreading too.

      Thumb up Thumb down +18

    • ImNotSteamPunk
      April 7, 2011 at 11:06 am

      Aww, I have a soft spot for R. Lee Ermey. I grew up with Marines, what can I say.

      Thumb up Thumb down +11

    • stephsparkle
      April 7, 2011 at 1:56 pm

      Your post just reminds me that I should be watching re-runs of “Mail Call” right now…

      Thumb up Thumb down +7

      • BatShitKrazyGlue
        April 7, 2011 at 4:03 pm

        I saw “re-runs” and for some reason I read “Mail Call” as “McHale’s Navy.” I guess that tells you a thing or two about me.

        Thumb up Thumb down +4

    • loganbacon
      April 7, 2011 at 1:57 pm

      Both more creative and gutsy than me. In my post above, I tiptoed around when I wanted to say, “So he got a purple heart. How does she know he wasn’t an asshat? My dad has a purple heart and he’s an asshat.”

      Thumb up Thumb down +27

      • ImNotSteamPunk
        April 8, 2011 at 10:13 am

        A lot of people with Purple Hearts are asshats. I’ve met more than one in my life.

        Thumb up Thumb down 0

  36. Mclintock160
    April 7, 2011 at 10:23 am

    Seriously that cat clock kinda grows on you, I’d trade a jar of dead bees for it.

    Thumb up Thumb down +75

  37. TheEdwardianGirl
    April 7, 2011 at 10:24 am

    There’s a market for just about anything out there. Sometimes people will buy or market the damndest things…

    Thumb up Thumb down +7

  38. lrv
    April 7, 2011 at 10:29 am

    From the treasury “Morose by Any Other Name: Things That Make Me Unbearably Sad.”

    Thumb up Thumb down +37

  39. parismom
    April 7, 2011 at 10:31 am

    Barnum was abso-fuckin’-lutely right!

    Thumb up Thumb down +11

  40. CatPaintingTuesday
    April 7, 2011 at 10:35 am

    I’d buy that cat clock in two seconds!

    And I don’t know how to put this, but I had boots just like that, except that underneath the fur, they were wellies.

    Thumb up Thumb down +15

  41. princesscathy
    April 7, 2011 at 10:41 am

    except for the cat clock (which is cute but a little odd) everything else made me flinch as soon as I saw it. Sometimes I wonder how many times will i flinch at items from etsy before i am desensitized from it.

    Thumb up Thumb down +18

  42. freckleyredhead
    April 7, 2011 at 10:41 am

    I want the cat clock!!!!!!!!!!!

    Thumb up Thumb down +12

    • freckleyredhead
      April 7, 2011 at 10:47 am

      And check out this clock in the same seller’s shop – VERY cool!

      http://www.etsy.com/listing/70498565/vintage-1960s-ibm-disk-platter-now-a

      Thumb up Thumb down +18

      • sullw214
        April 7, 2011 at 12:07 pm

        That is a cool clock.

        Thumb up Thumb down +9

        • Cindy-Lou Hoohoo
          April 8, 2011 at 1:58 am

          Yeah. Definitely worth buying.

          Thumb up Thumb down +1

      • terriwells
        April 7, 2011 at 12:39 pm

        Wow, that is actually pretty classy. I can think of at least two people I’d get a kick out of giving that to; one’s a 30-year veteran of IBM, and the other collects old computer hardware. (The former IBMer just had a birthday, but the collector is getting married in late June…hmmm…).

        Thumb up Thumb down +8

      • Fia Flammiferous
        April 7, 2011 at 1:48 pm

        I really like this seller’s work. Yes, the cat clock, too.

        Thumb up Thumb down +11

      • EyeHeartSpiders
        April 7, 2011 at 2:32 pm

        Speaking as a nerd, it makes me very happy that we now live in a world where any part of a computer can be seriously described as having a “patina.”

        Thumb up Thumb down +18

      • Contrary
        April 7, 2011 at 10:28 pm

        I would definitely buy some of these geeky clocks, especially the cat one.

        Thumb up Thumb down +3

      • ImNotSteamPunk
        April 8, 2011 at 10:14 am

        I should hope there’s not many left. It isn’t like IBM made a side business of turning disks into clocks. That left that for Retetsy sellers.

        Thumb up Thumb down 0

  43. gnommy
    April 7, 2011 at 10:42 am

    I’d only buy the unicorn horn if it came with a snood.

    Thumb up Thumb down +31

    • TangoPig
      April 7, 2011 at 11:08 am

      Would that be a snoodicorn or a unisnood?

      Thumb up Thumb down +37

      • Flutterguy
        April 7, 2011 at 1:05 pm

        A Snoodicorn – because a Unisnood is one you can use multipurpose.

        Thumb up Thumb down +23

    • buzzbattlecat
      April 7, 2011 at 2:06 pm

      I’m pretty sure her mother can help you out there.

      Thumb up Thumb down +4

  44. spasticaster
    April 7, 2011 at 10:43 am

    I took a look at fetal wildcat person’s shop and found THIS: http://www.etsy.com/listing/48393573/real-pine-boogey-low-maintenance GEE! Thanks! I’ve always wanted a tiny pet made out of an “actual tanned squirrel scrotum.” God knows I wouldn’t want one made with a FAUX tanned squirrel scrotum.

    Thumb up Thumb down +33

    • lrv
      April 7, 2011 at 10:49 am

      That would look great with one of those “alien trophies” made out of a deer butt. (Look it up! It’s really a real thing!)

      Thumb up Thumb down +12

      • spasticaster
        April 7, 2011 at 10:57 am

        “Many people say that the real talent to deer butt art is the shaping of the anus to look like a mouth, a true test of the artists loving hand.

        Your anus can be made very simple, or you can stretch your anus for realistic effects such as smiles and frowns.”

        …oh, deer.

        Thumb up Thumb down +36

        • tiny giraffe
          April 7, 2011 at 12:08 pm

          In all the goatse we’ve enjoyed* on this site, never once have I seen realistic smiles or frowns.

          *enjoyed= endured.

          Thumb up Thumb down +16

        • BitterSweet
          April 7, 2011 at 12:40 pm

          I… I’m not sure I want to google that, but the curiosity is overpowering.

          Thumb up Thumb down +11

        • BitterSweet
          April 7, 2011 at 12:44 pm

          And I googled it… I officially pronounce this world fuckin’ insane and am planning to crawl under the biggest rock in the deepest cave I can find.

          Thumb up Thumb down +31

        • spiritwunion
          April 7, 2011 at 3:50 pm

          Another day, another dismaying thing I can’t unlearn. Thanks Regretsy!

          Thumb up Thumb down +14

      • anaceofkidneys
        April 7, 2011 at 10:59 am

        It’s called a swamp devil.

        Thumb up Thumb down +6

        • lrv
          April 7, 2011 at 11:12 am

          I have to respectfully disagree. If you do an image search for “Swamp Devil,” you don’t find what I’m talking about.

          If you do an image search for “Deer Butt Alien,” BAM! Thar she blows!

          Alternately, I have heard the term “Assquatch.”

          Thumb up Thumb down +23

      • tiny giraffe
        April 7, 2011 at 12:10 pm

        Damn it, I can’t believe I googled that, and came up with this:

        http://dba-oracle.blogspot.com/2008/10/fast-anus-removal-with-butt-out.html

        “The anus removal is a critical aspect to proper redneck butt art, a great holiday activity for the whole family.”

        Thumb up Thumb down +22

        • terriwells
          April 7, 2011 at 12:46 pm

          I love Regretsy; it’s so educational. I had no idea before today that deer butt art even existed.

          Thumb up Thumb down +23

        • Twattybanjo
          April 7, 2011 at 3:04 pm

          OK this has officially blown my mind. I feel really disturbed now

          Thumb up Thumb down +10

        • fancyskants
          April 7, 2011 at 6:10 pm

          Dear God! One of them has TEETH.

          Thumb up Thumb down +5

        • frogprof
          March 22, 2012 at 11:03 am

          The fact that someone makes a TOOL to remove deer ani [isn't that the plural?] is really disturbing.

          Thumb up Thumb down +1

      • iggypickle
        April 7, 2011 at 8:30 pm

        Oh HOLY HELL, you weren’t kidding!!!!

        Thumb up Thumb down +6

    • unseeliepixie
      April 7, 2011 at 1:39 pm

      I wouldn’t think there would be enough there to be worth the effort of tanning it.

      Thumb up Thumb down +8

    • loganbacon
      April 7, 2011 at 1:49 pm

      Oh dear sweet bajingoes on a crutch. And I thought the rat hat was bad.

      Thumb up Thumb down +14

  45. qwertygirl
    April 7, 2011 at 10:45 am

    I think I saw those spats one cold wintry day at the MGM in Detroit coupled with gold satin booty shorts.

    Thumb up Thumb down +16

    • iggypickle
      April 7, 2011 at 8:29 pm

      So did I, but I think it was Walmart on a Friday night.

      Thumb up Thumb down +8

  46. Church Lady Brought a Hot Dish
    April 7, 2011 at 10:47 am

    I can make a better set of fairy wings WITH MY ASSHOLE!

    Thumb up Thumb down +18

  47. Cnids
    April 7, 2011 at 10:47 am

    I totally thought the spanish sign was supposed to say “hollah” for a while.

    Thumb up Thumb down +6

  48. Irishyankee
    April 7, 2011 at 10:48 am

    When my mother passed, we found a box among her effects labeled “Father Power’s Dirt” in my Grandmother’s handwriting. Some research led to this:

    http://www.bettnet.com/blog/index.php/weblog/comments/the_little_known_shrine_in_our_midst/

    So, we have Heirloom Dirt!

    Thumb up Thumb down +11

    • ImNotSteamPunk
      April 7, 2011 at 11:15 am

      Interesting. I have dirt from my grandmother’s grave. I’ve never taken any from someone’s grave (my mom got me mine) so I don’t know the etiquette but I do know some Pagans that use grave dirt aka “goopher dust”.

      That’s an cool article. Never heard of him before but its sort of neat you have that little mystery you got to figure out.

      Thumb up Thumb down +7

      • Irishyankee
        April 7, 2011 at 11:28 am

        Thanks. I wonder what people will dig up about us in 90 years?

        Thumb up Thumb down +8

        • ImNotSteamPunk
          April 8, 2011 at 10:17 am

          NOTHING. I will leave every dark, dirty secret lying around for them to find. *insert evil Mr. Burns laugh*

          Seriously though, my family’s skeletons don’t hang out in closets. They get out & dance around on a regular basis.

          Thumb up Thumb down +10

  49. gwhizzy
    April 7, 2011 at 10:54 am

    That’s a whole lotta WTF.

    Thumb up Thumb down +7

  50. anaceofkidneys
    April 7, 2011 at 10:58 am

    Yay Sarina Brewer! She is awesome. (Way better than the “taxidermist”/animal recycler person who was featured last week.)

    Thumb up Thumb down +5

    • honeybuzzard
      April 7, 2011 at 12:25 pm

      Yay another person who knows of Sarina Brewer! I was just going to post to point out that she does AWESOME taxidermied pieces (if you’re into that). Though her jarred animals and pieces might turn some people off, her actual “gallery” pieces are amazing. She creates oddities, side show type pieces. And she is very ethical… no animals are killed for her work, all are roadkill or donated and she uses every part in respect for the dead animals (hence some of her weird listings).

      Check out her website at http://www.customcreaturetaxidermy.com and look at the gallery and side show pieces. Very cool stuff!

      Thumb up Thumb down +13

      • Moose
        April 7, 2011 at 5:13 pm

        Wow, those are really amazing. Way better than the fish-squirrel.

        Thumb up Thumb down +1

        • fancyskants
          April 7, 2011 at 6:19 pm

          NOTHING is better than the fish squirrel.

          Thumb up Thumb down +8

  51. Captain Emo
    April 7, 2011 at 10:59 am

    “It’s a lifestyle.” What’s a lifestyle? Can someone tell me why cutting up shit and putting ruffles on it qualifies as a lifestyle?

    Thumb up Thumb down +27

    • AnEnchantedNotion
      April 7, 2011 at 6:57 pm

      I’m pretty sure being an idiot is the lifestyle she was referring to. That, or being really cold all the time.

      Thumb up Thumb down +8

  52. Crabbey
    April 7, 2011 at 11:00 am

    I really want to know who’d possibly put a dead rat head in their hair for decoration. Seriously. Who?

    Thumb up Thumb down +17

    • rodgertheshrubber
      April 7, 2011 at 11:14 am

      Dr. Seuss’ lesser known character, Rat in the Hat.

      Thumb up Thumb down +47

    • prynsesscraftsy
      April 7, 2011 at 11:16 am

      Lady Gaga?

      Thumb up Thumb down +23

      • Cindy-Lou Hoohoo
        April 8, 2011 at 2:00 am

        Oh god, don’t give her any ideas…

        Thumb up Thumb down +6

    • TangoPig
      April 7, 2011 at 11:16 am

      *raises hand*

      I let my live ones crawl on me all the time when I kept them. A prettified dead one in my hair would be a good tool for keeping their furry butts in line.

      Thumb up Thumb down +29

    • qwertygirl
      April 7, 2011 at 1:59 pm

      More than likely someone with tickets to the Kentucky Derby.

      Thumb up Thumb down +3

    • Fia Flammiferous
      April 7, 2011 at 2:04 pm

      I don’t know, but I was cat-sitting for a friend last month when she was away, and one morning I came downstairs to find a severed mouse head on the floor. I obviously threw away a whole load of dinero when I tossed it away outside. Damn!

      I never found the rest of the mouse, by the way.

      Thumb up Thumb down +9

      • catherder
        April 7, 2011 at 2:33 pm

        Sounds like the Kitty Mafia stopped by!

        Thumb up Thumb down +9

      • Badger
        April 7, 2011 at 7:39 pm

        As a long-time cat owner, it meant one of two things:

        1. The cat liked you, and was trying to curry your favor by bringing you a present.

        2. The cat was pissed their owner had gone away and left them , and was expressing it’s displeasure the only way it could.

        As for what happened to the rest of the mouse, they may’ve eaten it. Or they may’ve just decapitated it and left the body lying somewhere to rot. Cats are strange that way.

        Thumb up Thumb down +15

    • Lanus
      April 8, 2011 at 4:51 am

      I will personally give Kate Middleton a dollar if she wears it to Ascot next year.

      Thumb up Thumb down +4

  53. Bold as Brash Brendamouse
    April 7, 2011 at 11:08 am

    Could you imagine wearing all of those craptastic creations at one time? While carrying your fetal wildcat on your plate of grave dirt? Not sure about the Holah thing. That just might tip the whole ensemble to just plain silly.

    Thumb up Thumb down +19

  54. Postmenopaws in a Purple Turban
    April 7, 2011 at 11:09 am

    The wildcat fetus just makes me very, very said. Dead kitties aren’t much fun, no no no…

    Thumb up Thumb down +23

    • prynsesscraftsy
      April 7, 2011 at 11:17 am

      I knew a guy in the Army who said he though of a basket of dead kittens to make sex last longer (I’m hoping so he didn’t get too excited too fast). I was practically the barracks whore, but I did not sleep with that man.

      Thumb up Thumb down +22

    • prynsesscraftsy
      April 7, 2011 at 11:21 am

      Also, I was okay with the cat until I saw the picture of it in the hand. It made me almost cry. Then again, my meds aren’t working, so getting phone calls from telemarketers makes me cry right now.

      Thumb up Thumb down +20

      • Postmenopaws in a Purple Turban
        April 7, 2011 at 11:24 am

        The close-up on the face did me in. I refuse to go back and see which picture that is in the line-up. I haven’t been on meds in about four years, so I’m all outta tears.

        {{proofreads extremely carefully}}

        Thumb up Thumb down +6

      • catherder
        April 7, 2011 at 2:06 pm

        It makes me extra sad because it looks like it could be a fetal version of my big boy Liam (Maine Coon mix–we think). He was six weeks old and all of about 1 1/2 lbs. when we brought him home from the shelter. I know better than to look at the close-ups. Our cats are our babies.

        Off to hug my kitties. Back in a minute.

        Thumb up Thumb down +12

    • Postmenopaws in a Purple Turban
      April 7, 2011 at 11:21 am

      *sad.

      I only get said about tanned squirrel scrotums. Scrota.

      Thumb up Thumb down +6

  55. ImNotSteamPunk
    April 7, 2011 at 11:11 am

    I figured out what was wrong with this kid’s Spanish. She must live in Arlen, TX and have Ppppeeeeggggyyyyy Hill as her Spanish teacher. That’s the only excuse I can figure for butchering Hola that badly.

    Thumb up Thumb down +24

    • Contrary
      April 7, 2011 at 10:35 pm

      may lah-mo peggy hill! ho yeah!

      Thumb up Thumb down +7

  56. TheSheep
    April 7, 2011 at 11:12 am

    Cat clock rocks. And I am apparently the only person here who kind of hearts on the faux fur legwarmers – I like silly costume pieces. WTF on the cat fetus though, I mean. GAAAAH. It ain’t hand made, and if it is vintage I don’t want to know!

    Thumb up Thumb down +7

  57. Paddy the rat
    April 7, 2011 at 11:12 am

    This dirt … was respectfully taken from the heart area of the grave of a Sergeant. She just stole it! Is respectfully taken a new slang for stolen? And it’s not just any odd sergeant, it’s the decorated one, so he’s probably turning in his grave if he knows how little his dirt is making on etsy…

    Thumb up Thumb down +15

    • ViolentGlitterOrgy
      April 7, 2011 at 11:36 am

      Yeah. Respectfully…like how a tribe member in a forest asks the tree for his forgiveness before cutting, I guess.

      Cept this is a grave. That she is stealing from. Not even the grave of a witch or a hoodoo practitioner, where that might be expected. Nope. Just an American Officer. I’m sure that will make for big magick.

      Thumb up Thumb down +9

      • EyeHeartSpiders
        April 7, 2011 at 2:55 pm

        I picture the ghost of a serviceman in uniform standing there scratching his head going, “…The Hell?” as dirt is removed from his grave by a woman wearing the furry leg warmers and hoarder fairy wings.

        Thumb up Thumb down +20

        • Badger
          April 7, 2011 at 7:42 pm

          That imagine makes this entire mess just a little bit easier to look at. Thank you.

          Thumb up Thumb down +4

        • catherder
          April 7, 2011 at 9:29 pm

          Muttering “I went to war for *this* weirdo?”

          Thumb up Thumb down +4

  58. Paddy the rat
    April 7, 2011 at 11:16 am

    and the rat fascinator… who bought it? A cat? Cause I just can’t imagine a person wearing one…

    Thumb up Thumb down +12

    • TangoPig
      April 7, 2011 at 11:18 am

      It would be a great “hunting trophy” for a weird dollhouse. I have great enthusiasm for this rat head.

      Thumb up Thumb down +14

      • Paddy the rat
        April 7, 2011 at 11:24 am

        Well if it was made of polymer clay it would be cool for a weird dollhouse, I guess the real thing would please few:)

        Thumb up Thumb down +8

      • ViolentGlitterOrgy
        April 7, 2011 at 11:39 am

        If it were truly mounted..like say, a mouse head mounted like an elk head for a darkly themed dollhouse…with tiny antlers? I could see it.

        Dark, but kinda funny.

        Rats on your head, though…no.

        Thumb up Thumb down +15

    • unseeliepixie
      April 7, 2011 at 1:42 pm

      I would possibly pay money to the person who buys it and then puts it on the cat to model it… seriously.

      Thumb up Thumb down +15

  59. SteamPunkFannyPack
    April 7, 2011 at 11:18 am

    I would’ve gotten the clock for my husband who works in IT.

    Thumb up Thumb down +6

  60. Paddy the rat
    April 7, 2011 at 11:18 am

    as for the jeans – poor and pityful – agreed. Upcycled? – no, downcycled more like it, or even undercycled, or maybe off-cycled – help me here :)

    Thumb up Thumb down +18

    • Bold as Brash Brendamouse
      April 7, 2011 at 1:05 pm

      recycled?

      Thumb up Thumb down +3

    • Bold as Brash Brendamouse
      April 7, 2011 at 1:07 pm

      upchuck-cycled?

      Thumb up Thumb down +8

    • Flutterguy
      April 7, 2011 at 1:12 pm

      The washing machine spun off-cycle. That’s what happened to the leg seams.

      Thumb up Thumb down +9

  61. Paddy the rat
    April 7, 2011 at 11:20 am

    I love the cat clock.

    Thumb up Thumb down +8

  62. prynsesscraftsy
    April 7, 2011 at 11:23 am

    I had to go to the dead fetus seller’s shop…who the hell uses a dead pigeon’s head for a doll or puppet?
    http://www.etsy.com/listing/58843639/pigeon-head-adult-long-neck-real-bird?ref=v1_other_2

    I like to think I’m open-minded, but, today, everything in that shop made me cringe or frown.

    Thumb up Thumb down +9

    • Rana
      April 7, 2011 at 11:47 am

      Weirdly, I can kinda see it – for one of those strange fetishy art dolls.

      Thumb up Thumb down +5

    • Church Lady Brought a Hot Dish
      April 7, 2011 at 12:20 pm

      That shop is brimming with WTF. Thankfully they have gift certificates. Because why be so draconian as to purchase a pot-bellied pig hoof fob when your loved one might prefer the alligator foot choker or a set of squirrel paws? Really, let them CHOOSE.

      Thumb up Thumb down +19

  63. Snickerdoodle
    April 7, 2011 at 11:23 am

    I live a few blocks from Arlington Cemetery, who knew I could make a living desecrating the graves of our departed servicemembers? “Quit Your Day Job” featured seller here I come!

    Thumb up Thumb down +23

    • Paddy the rat
      April 7, 2011 at 11:33 am

      Would you really be able to quit your day job selling dirt for $3.33?

      Thumb up Thumb down +10

      • branchman67
        April 7, 2011 at 12:30 pm

        300,000+ people are interred at Arlington. At 3.33 per grave, that’s about $1,000,000 in desecrating cash to be earned. And, of course, you can always step up the price for defiling the graves of Medal of Honor winners and former Presidents…

        Thumb up Thumb down +23

        • Paddy the rat
          April 7, 2011 at 1:15 pm

          Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

          Thumb up Thumb down -4

        • Paddy the rat
          April 7, 2011 at 1:23 pm

          Also if it somehow does become a successful money making machine I can see graveyard mafia gangs emerging, fighting for the plots of famous people, defending their territory etc.

          Thumb up Thumb down +5

    • Paddy the rat
      April 7, 2011 at 1:18 pm

      If you do venture into this please make sure you collect the dirt respectfully.

      Thumb up Thumb down +15

  64. Encaitare
    April 7, 2011 at 11:26 am

    I like the Mario and Luigi plate! I don’t like the possible incest implications, but other than that it’s kinda fun.

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  65. sweetx0xkatie
    April 7, 2011 at 11:29 am

    The cat fetus just reminds me of my scary biology teacher from high school. The anatomy class she taught had to dissect cats, and the day after they arrived she showed off her collection of jarred cat fetuses and happily told us how every year she orders pregnant cats for the anatomy class so she can keep the fetuses. If only she knew about Etsy…

    Thumb up Thumb down +7

    • BitterSweet
      April 7, 2011 at 1:05 pm

      Uh, how do these people are let to teach anybody?! I understand the purpose of dissection and other biology studies, but that teacher sounds like a sadistic nutcase.

      Thumb up Thumb down +8

      • Flutterguy
        April 7, 2011 at 1:14 pm

        Science teachers are legally required to be ‘off’ in the head. Mine had a slo-pitch accident (lol) and brought in the ruptured vein they cut out of his thigh. Nice guy though.

        Thumb up Thumb down +8

        • Twyll
          April 7, 2011 at 2:36 pm

          My chemistry teacher ate chalk. “It’s chemically pretty much the same as baking soda, so it’s good for your stomach!” Why not just eat baking soda then?!

          Also she could go an entire day without peeing, and expected us to do the same. >_<

          Thumb up Thumb down +11

        • andlikeit
          April 7, 2011 at 3:32 pm

          I’m a science teacher, and totally not “off” in the head!! Although I teach college biology… does that count?
          My high school biology teacher did come in to Victoria’s Secret when I worked there and try on a negligee. He said it was for his wife, but I knew he wasn’t married. He totally recognized me, too!

          Thumb up Thumb down +21

    • catherder
      April 7, 2011 at 2:19 pm

      There was an advanced biology class at my HS that did that. I didn’t take that class. It was back in the Dark Ages of the 80s, so it never occurred to me to put together a protest movement.

      Now? Hell yeah. I’m not a PETA person, but there’d be hell to pay over dissection. I still remember Frog Day, the teacher realizing he hadn’t killed enough frogs for the class, and whacking a few extras. Literally. I was lucky enough to be out sick on Fetal Pig day.

      And guess what? Nobody made any major discoveries about frog/fetal pig/cat anatomy in those classes. I can’t remember anything about frog anatomy that good illustrations wouldn’t have told me. All I remember is those frogs being killed.

      I don’t have a problem with using animals in research when there is Absolutely No Alternative. But biology classes doing the same damned dissections for decades doesn’t count.

      Thumb up Thumb down +14

  66. craptastic
    April 7, 2011 at 11:29 am

    The thing is, this sweet baby’s are one of a kind, so it’s understandable why they sold.

    I’m going to making clink clink in gipsy style now.

    Thumb up Thumb down +7

  67. Princess Buzzkill Crying Glitter Eagle
    April 7, 2011 at 11:30 am

    Rat Head Fascinator is a great band name. Not so much as a “thing to wear on your head for any reason whatsoever”.

    Thumb up Thumb down +27

  68. ViolentGlitterOrgy
    April 7, 2011 at 11:33 am

    Sold.

    That’s the only word certain folks saw in this whoooole shebang.

    Look for more horrific furspats to be found all over the flea Mar..er…Etsy!

    Thumb up Thumb down +8

  69. fag_waver
    April 7, 2011 at 11:33 am

    i own jeans just like that! they got that way after a drunken argument with my bf, though…maybe i could sell them with bows sewn on!

    i, uh, also have a pair with the crotch ripped out…

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  70. Piratezombi3
    April 7, 2011 at 11:40 am

    The unicorn lady is the last of her kind. “holah” is her mating call. Please bring offerings of dead preserved animals to assure a full life.

    Thumb up Thumb down +19

  71. Yummy Num Nums
    April 7, 2011 at 11:43 am

    Pearl has had over 2500 sales. I have to study her success. When I open my store, I won’t have much room for error.

    I wouldn’t buy jeans like this, but crap, I have work jeans I retired because they’ve faded. I can cut the sides and sell them? Wow. I’m inspired.

    I wear v-neck white tee shirts under my uniform…and the pits have darkened/stained. Any use before I pitch them? Shit. I thought I was going to sell knitting and jewelry. Now I think my grocery garb might be worth more money! Help. Wine is making me brainstorm (3rd shifter, so it’s like midnight for me).

    Thumb up Thumb down +11

  72. nikkipook
    April 7, 2011 at 11:46 am

    I dont understand why the preserved specimen is so weird to everyone….(might be because I have a few of my own…*lol*)

    A science teacher could have bought it…or a student. Mine got me some excellent science credits when I was in school.

    Thumb up Thumb down +1

  73. abgar
    April 7, 2011 at 11:49 am

    Aw, that cat clock was nice :|

    wait… they sell graveyard dirt in big stores?

    Thumb up Thumb down +10

  74. CanadianByMarriage
    April 7, 2011 at 11:51 am

    Disney’s going for a hipper, more bohemian look with T-Bell.

    Thumb up Thumb down +8

    • CanadianByMarriage
      April 7, 2011 at 11:52 am

      Thumb up Thumb down +1

      • CanadianByMarriage
        April 7, 2011 at 11:54 am

        You try to be cool and post a picture and it’s not showing up. I should just give up on being cool. Not working for me.

        http://img821.imageshack.us/img821/9387/tbell.jpg

        Thumb up Thumb down +15

        • lemon_bombs
          April 7, 2011 at 2:24 pm

          She looks annoyed. I think I know why.

          Thumb up Thumb down +5

        • Twyll
          April 7, 2011 at 2:44 pm

          Bahahahaha. Love the pissed look on her face.

          Is it bad that in your first post, I read “T-Bell” as “Taco Bell” and wondered what Disney was doing with my favorite not-even-Mexican-enough-to-be-fake-Mexican restaurant?

          Thumb up Thumb down +9

        • fancyskants
          April 7, 2011 at 6:29 pm

          Holah!

          Thumb up Thumb down +7

  75. Starchasm
    April 7, 2011 at 11:54 am

    LOL, Custom Creature is in my favorite shops. Their website is AMAZING.

    They could totally save that “Holah” sign by adding an “L” and a star of David.

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

  76. Maman Brigitte
    April 7, 2011 at 11:56 am

    Every single one of those items looks like they were found in Jame Gumb’s house from “Silence of the Lambs.” Especially the fairy wings.

    Thumb up Thumb down +21

  77. beesonpie
    April 7, 2011 at 12:01 pm

    It was either her or Tilda Swinton.

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

    • beesonpie
      April 7, 2011 at 12:03 pm

      OK, I swear I put the code in the first time.

      Thumb up Thumb down +1

    • ViolentGlitterOrgy
      April 7, 2011 at 12:05 pm

      The SWINTON is an amazing fashionista.

      Oh..I know..it’s bad sometimes. But I love her. She Crazy. Crazy as in awesome.

      Thumb up Thumb down +11

  78. pullmyleg
    April 7, 2011 at 12:02 pm

    I’d like to put a whole outfit together using the flappin’ jeans, the rat head thing, the boots and the unicorn horn – I’d have to borrow the leopard print tassels in from yesterday to complete the set.

    Thumb up Thumb down +12

    • pullmyleg
      April 7, 2011 at 12:03 pm

      Oops… I forgot the fairy wings… Now we’re all set to go.

      Thumb up Thumb down +10

      • DagobahJane
        April 7, 2011 at 1:41 pm

        Look at the replies for the comment above yours. Someone granted your wish!

        Thumb up Thumb down +2

  79. bluelouwwoz
    April 7, 2011 at 12:03 pm

    If I had money to blow…the rat head and the cat foetus, definitely.

    Thumb up Thumb down +1

  80. LadyLovelace
    April 7, 2011 at 12:08 pm

    I’m not ashamed to say that I’d buy those wings and wear the hell out of them if I had any disposable income at all.

    As it is, I have a coathanger somewhere…

    Thumb up Thumb down +7

  81. Rev. Back It On Up 13
    April 7, 2011 at 12:08 pm

    The cutest jeans in the ENTIRE WORLD. That is not hyperbole – she is serious.

    Why did you only post this stuff AFTER it was sold? Now none of us will have the opportunity to wear the CUTEST JEANS IN THE ENTIRE WORLD I AM SERIOUS unless we capture the current owner, and skin her.

    Thumb up Thumb down +19

  82. thewholehalf
    April 7, 2011 at 12:11 pm

    That cat clock is mankind’s greatest treasure

    Thumb up Thumb down +10

  83. The Cabbage Snatch Kid
    April 7, 2011 at 12:12 pm

    my boyfriend’s half Italian – I kinda wish I’d bought that plate as a gift for him. Or his mom. Probably not for his mom, actually.

    Thumb up Thumb down +9

  84. grimmlynn
    April 7, 2011 at 12:17 pm

    A fool and his money are often parted due to etsy.

    Thumb up Thumb down +8

  85. thewholehalf
    April 7, 2011 at 12:22 pm

    “a fool and his shitty found objects are soon on Etsy “

    Thumb up Thumb down +16

  86. BitterSweet
    April 7, 2011 at 12:36 pm

    I’m most confused with the jeans – is somebody intending to wear them in public? Or are they havig an “ugly pants party” at the office?

    The wings are a whole different piece of cake – there are so many beautiful fairy wings for sale, I can’t comprehend how someone paid almost a hundred bucks on this granny’s curtains accident.

    Thumb up Thumb down +10

  87. Jane
    April 7, 2011 at 12:40 pm

    Thanks for making me lose my lunch. I’m sitting here chowing down on my bagel and boom!! Dead animals and graveyard dirt!! I spit up my bagel. :(

    Never again will I read and eat lunch.

    Thumb up Thumb down +5

  88. Rev. Back It On Up 13
    April 7, 2011 at 12:46 pm

    A pouch of alleged graveyard dirt seems like a perfectly reasonable thing to purchase from a total stranger on the internet. Every fifth bag of dirt comes with free magic beans. Every tenth bag of dirt comes with a sticker that says “SMRT”.

    Thumb up Thumb down +15

  89. Ilse
    April 7, 2011 at 12:50 pm

    I am equally grossed out and stupefied. A freaking cat fetus? Gross! The only thing in that whole freaking list worth paying anything for is that cat clock…it’s dumb but it serves real purpose if it works. Wow!

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

  90. bunnyslugger
    April 7, 2011 at 12:51 pm

    Stick a suctioncup on the horn and you’ve got a sale lil missy. And that grave dirt one makes me lose faith in the USA. Assuming it’s real: A. who has the nuts to start digging up war heros? B. Shouldn’t somone be watching military graveyards?

    Thumb up Thumb down +6

  91. Corax
    April 7, 2011 at 12:53 pm

    I would definitely buy the wildcat foetus, I’m actually a big fan of the artist who sold it (looking at previous comments, I see she’s already been mentioned).

    I might also buy the fairy wings, if I didn’t want to thrown a curtain into a ceiling fan myself.

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

  92. melimorgue
    April 7, 2011 at 12:53 pm

    Whether it’s from a grave or anywhere else, I refuse to pay money for dirt. I could always go get some from the vacuum, for free.

    Thumb up Thumb down +12

    • Paddy the rat
      April 7, 2011 at 2:24 pm

      Why not contact the seller with a lucrative business proposal – welcome her to collect all the dirt from your hoover and from around the house/yard and she can keep it as a payment for cleaning up?

      Thumb up Thumb down +6

  93. bushhog39
    April 7, 2011 at 1:05 pm

    What kind of a person digs up dirt from someone’s grave…to SELL?!?! WOW. I really have no words…just, WOW.

    Thumb up Thumb down +10

  94. deathbycupcakes
    April 7, 2011 at 1:27 pm

    1. That daughter obviously never paid attention to Dora or her Spanish teacher.
    2. Who would buy graveyard dirt online when they could just drive to their local graveyard?
    3. Those pants are confusing. Are the crochet bows supposed to stop the jeans from fraying all the way to the waistband? Where would be the ideal climate for them? I mean, you can’t get true circulation with them since the inseams are intact.

    I am so glad I’m not the only one who likes the cat clock.

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

  95. ProfessorWiddlekins
    April 7, 2011 at 1:36 pm

    I would TOTALLY buy that cat clock

    Thumb up Thumb down +8

  96. annstarrr
    April 7, 2011 at 2:16 pm

    OK, the unicorn horn would be a great accessory to a unicorn Halloween or Mardi Gras costume. It looks like it would be cheaper than something from Party City, and would probably hold up better. I bought something very similar for a devil costume this year. It’s not like I wear the horns out around town (unless it’s Halloween). I bet the person who bought the unicorn horn also bought theirs for a costume.

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

  97. buzzbattlecat
    April 7, 2011 at 2:17 pm

    Goals for today:
    1 Kill Bigfoot
    2 Cut off legs
    3 Add elastic (vital!)
    4 Etsy

    Thumb up Thumb down +14

    • queen of spuds
      April 7, 2011 at 2:43 pm

      and 5…. Profit!!

      Thumb up Thumb down +8

      • Twyll
        April 7, 2011 at 2:49 pm

        Nonono, five is “???” and SIX is profit!

        Because let’s face it, that person must have been doing something pretty damn shady to get those things sold… which may or may not have involved war hero grave dirt.

        Thumb up Thumb down +8

        • buzzbattlecat
          April 7, 2011 at 5:24 pm

          I was a little wary of going for that meme, but I’m glad you did!

          Thumb up Thumb down +3

  98. waywardtopher
    April 7, 2011 at 2:25 pm

    I’m guessing the unicorn horn is available in a 2-piece set, and she’s wearing the other one on the lower end. She’s got that, “one-time-at-band-camp” look on her face.

    Thumb up Thumb down +10

  99. pardonm3
    April 7, 2011 at 2:49 pm

    Okay, I want the cat.

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

  100. Penny_Dreadful
    April 7, 2011 at 2:55 pm

    NOOOOOO ARE THERE MORE UNICORN HORNS

    Thumb up Thumb down +5

    • gnomestress
      April 7, 2011 at 3:19 pm

      I think it’s because they’re easy to make. I’ve made custom horns before and ‘unicorn’ style horns are the easiest to make. It’s a beginner project I think.

      Thumb up Thumb down +4

  101. Kaijuchris
    April 7, 2011 at 3:02 pm

    Holah people ! So far I have noted quite a few votes in favor of the cat clock. Well, you can add mine. The fact that no real cat was pickled, skinned or dismembered to make it only adds to its charm.

    Thumb up Thumb down +11

  102. ViolentGlitterOrgy
    April 7, 2011 at 3:06 pm

    And just to be totally pedantic, if you want yer spell to work, you have to dig up your own fucking grave dirt, on the right fucking day, at the right fucking time.

    Not that I have personally done that or anything.

    In a while.

    Thumb up Thumb down +19

    • angel drawers
      April 7, 2011 at 5:04 pm

      You act like magic is, like, hard or something. I don’t have time to be digging up my own dirt because I have a lot of homework this week, and besides my mom won’t drive me to the graveyard.

      Thumb up Thumb down +19

      • ViolentGlitterOrgy
        April 7, 2011 at 5:35 pm

        I knnnnnoooooooooowww! Like, right?

        Thumb up Thumb down +11

  103. Rainbow Vomit
    April 7, 2011 at 3:11 pm

    I too would take the clock and remove the cat parts. Harddrive clock in itself is cool enough. IF it actually works. I’ve seen some neat shit made out of harddrives. OH, i did see a digital cock made out of an HD before.

    Thumb up Thumb down +5

    • Kaijuchris
      April 8, 2011 at 3:34 am

      A digital what… ?

      Thumb up Thumb down +10

  104. gnomestress
    April 7, 2011 at 3:17 pm

    I might buy the unicorn horn if I was feeling especially lazy and didn’t want to make my own. I LARP though, so it has a purpose. If I need custom horns I generally make them myself. It’s not difficult.
    FWIW, I HAVE seen some people wearing horns at the Ren Faire around here (Bristol, WI). Some vendors sell them. Maybe people do wear these horns at Faires around the country but people don’t notice them because their eyes have been burned out via chain mail bikini. Squick.
    Mock away for the LARP thing if you must. I’m confortable with my nerdiness. :)

    Thumb up Thumb down +9

    • prynsesscraftsy
      April 7, 2011 at 11:14 pm

      Your monocle says you love being nerdy, but your angry eye-brows are daring us to say something so you can cut a bitch.

      Thumb up Thumb down +7

      • gnomestress
        April 8, 2011 at 7:41 am

        I gave up on dignity the day I realized that I play a mixture of dress up and cops vs robbers for fun on the weekends. ;)

        Thumb up Thumb down +5

  105. 18thangel
    April 7, 2011 at 5:01 pm

    I resent being called “earthy” by the fairy wings seller…I am serious.

    I would, however, love to have the title “Luxury Goddess of the Autumn” and go around making clink clink in gipsy style.

    Thumb up Thumb down +8

  106. Stretch65 is back and still not even remotely Steampunk
    April 7, 2011 at 5:39 pm

    Something tells me the preserved fetus is used in the process of creating a reborn Lola monkey…

    Thumb up Thumb down +7

    • fancyskants
      April 7, 2011 at 6:38 pm

      So was the graveyard dirt.

      Thumb up Thumb down +5

      • Stretch65 is back and still not even remotely Steampunk
        April 7, 2011 at 6:56 pm

        Preserved fetus – CHECK
        infamous gravesite dirt -CHECK
        Fairie dust and felted vagoo – CHECK and CHECK
        and wall-ah! REBORN LOLA MONKEY!

        Thumb up Thumb down +6

  107. KharmaApple
    April 7, 2011 at 5:54 pm

    I would actually buy that clock.
    Is something wrong with me?

    …Yeah, don’t answer that.

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

  108. sunnychapman
    April 7, 2011 at 6:09 pm

    Even when I was a drunkpunk back in the day, wore ripped black clothes I found in the trash and rolled around on filth and broken beer bottles at shows I wouldn’t WEAR A FUCKING RAT ON MY HEAD!
    GAH!!!!!

    Thumb up Thumb down +8

  109. knittin-kitten
    April 7, 2011 at 6:59 pm

    I sometimes see the things that people are selling on Etsy and never, ever, want to leave my house again.

    Thumb up Thumb down +6

  110. PeanutButtercup
    April 7, 2011 at 7:06 pm

    Why is it that the worst, most horrendous rubbish is made by the recycling, earth-mothery, “wasting-any-part-of-an-animal-is-disrespectful-to-mother-nature” loony bins?
    Some awesome stuff can be made by recycling. Why not go make some of that?

    Thumb up Thumb down +6

    • MissWalstra
      April 7, 2011 at 7:11 pm

      I don’t think they understand that ‘mother nature’s’ way of recycling is COMPOST. Killing an animal only for it’s tongue/gallbladder/fur = awful. Letting an accidentally killed creature rot back into the earth = nature! Preserving the remains of that kitten is the opposite of wasting.

      Thumb up Thumb down +12

      • MissWalstra
        April 7, 2011 at 8:04 pm

        Dur… by ‘opposite of wasting’ I meant ‘opposite of recycling’.

        Thumb up Thumb down +7

  111. thisisrobin
    April 7, 2011 at 7:16 pm

    Dear Whoever Bought Those Jeans, It sure would be entertaining to see a video of you walking briskly in them. Pretty Pu-leeeeze?

    Thumb up Thumb down +7

  112. Badger
    April 7, 2011 at 8:01 pm

    My reaction to the first picture after I scrolled down was “MITTENS, NO! WHAT HAVE THEY DONE TO YOU?!”

    I flunked out of college biology because I couldn’t dissect the cat. Had no trouble with the snake or the rat, but I had three cats of my own waiting and home, and how could I possibly face them after having dissected a possible relative?

    Thumb up Thumb down +8

  113. iggypickle
    April 7, 2011 at 8:11 pm

    Regretsy has tattooed a phrase on my brain, and this just reinforces it:

    “What the FUCK is wrong with people?!?!?!”

    I mean, these people could just send their money to me and not have to clutter up their spaces with….THIS!

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

  114. KnitChaos
    April 7, 2011 at 8:15 pm

    Those heels really sell the whole roadkill shinwarmers. Nothing screams class like shredding looking fur and shitty used ribbons over high heels. Pair that with the rodent fascinater and you’re ready for a night out at a backwoods kegger.

    Don’t forget the hotel bedsheets accented with dumpster dived treasures and you have a real whimsicle thang going on. All your cousins will be so jealous as they feel you up!

    Thumb up Thumb down +6

  115. Tura23
    April 7, 2011 at 8:19 pm

    I think that rat needs some googley eyes. There is nothing that cannot be improved by the addition of googley eyes!

    Thumb up Thumb down +9

    • iggypickle
      April 7, 2011 at 8:20 pm

      AND glitter! Don’t forget the glitter!!!! :D

      Thumb up Thumb down +3

    • Kaijuchris
      April 8, 2011 at 3:32 am

      And a moustache.

      Thumb up Thumb down +2

    • msdoolittle
      April 8, 2011 at 3:54 pm

      Definitely…those huge ones that would make it look like Cookie Monster. Touche.

      Thumb up Thumb down +2

  116. StinkBait
    April 7, 2011 at 8:26 pm

    If you mix the grave dirt with the cat fetus, will a Pet Cemetery thing occur?

    Thumb up Thumb down +19

  117. Ms. Anthrope
    April 7, 2011 at 8:40 pm

    There’s a rat on your head! THERE’S A FUCKING RAT ON YOUR HEAD!!

    Oh…

    People are fucking ‘tards.

    Thumb up Thumb down +12

    • fancyskants
      April 8, 2011 at 12:41 pm

      Gotta clean the spray off my computer again. Thanks, Ms. Anthrope.

      Thumb up Thumb down +3

  118. HovercatMittens
    April 7, 2011 at 9:03 pm

    Not gonna lie, I would totally buy the cat clock. Even if that bitch was $50. K more like $38.50 but it would be sold is all I’m sayin’…

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

  119. CrazyBlues
    April 7, 2011 at 9:11 pm

    I have a tiger fetus and a pig fetus in my display case. I’m really not sure why they’re there… I still live with my father, and we’ve had them as long as I can remember. I’m not even sure that he remembers where we got them… XD

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  120. whaapplewha
    April 7, 2011 at 10:08 pm

    Oh holy shit. I wheeze-laughed like a crazy person when I saw those jeans. Kids these days….

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

  121. ethera
    April 8, 2011 at 7:13 am

    I don’t mind the cat clock – at least you can tell it is hand made, it is recycling something and that person actually had to have an idea for it to happen.
    I showed my boyfriend the furry leg things and he asked WTF they were supposed to be. So I googled spats and showed him a picture. His response? “You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means”.

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  122. randomtask
    April 8, 2011 at 7:17 am

    I kept my fetal cat from AP Bio and took it to college. That’s how I made friends – “Hey, I have a preserved cat in a jar. Wanna see?” Well, that and I sold cigarettes from my room. Good times.

    Thumb up Thumb down +9

    • ViolentGlitterOrgy
      April 8, 2011 at 7:34 am

      Thank you for my first laugh of the day.

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  123. deathofsanity
    April 8, 2011 at 7:48 am

    To be honest, my eyes went to the name and image of the first item (the kitten) before I read the title of this post and I speedily clicked it, hoping no one else had bought it yet. So, yes, I would definitely purchase a kitten in a jar. My decor is a little on the eccentric side. (I swear I’m not goth/emo/whatever.) I already have an alligator head, a fetal shark and a pig embryo (the latter two in jars).

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    • Azuris
      April 8, 2011 at 1:07 pm

      Are you my friend Jordan? Because that suspiciously sounds like her collection as well.

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  124. realitybitesme
    April 8, 2011 at 12:20 pm

    I would so buy the rat hat.

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  125. Azuris
    April 8, 2011 at 1:06 pm

    I would probably buy the mario plate for kicks, it’s cute in a weird way.

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  126. yecats
    April 8, 2011 at 9:35 pm

    The seller of the fairy wings looks like she covered some fabric in super glue and rolled around in a craft store dumpster.

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  127. sheltiepitbullfun
    April 8, 2011 at 9:54 pm

    I never understood the whole taxidermy decor thing but I’m willing to learn–somebody try selling your dead pets on etsy and let’s see what happens. Maybe the world is waiting for a kitten-head fascinator and just doesn’t know it yet?

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  128. readyfornothing
    April 8, 2011 at 9:59 pm

    I’m a science teacher and I probably would have TOTALLY bought that preserved wild cat.

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  129. Spockerella
    April 9, 2011 at 12:02 pm

    Guess what, Mother Nature also does not believe in wasting any part of an animal. It’s called “decomposition”, and it’s a bit more earth-friendly than your jar of formaldehyde there.

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  130. jamiegirl
    April 9, 2011 at 12:44 pm

    I’d actually buy the fetus…but I’m weird like that.

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  131. Snarky Bitch
    April 9, 2011 at 9:09 pm

    A noble spirit who would give up anything, apparently that includes the dirt used to bury him.

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  132. olivertwisto
    April 11, 2011 at 5:18 am

    Nothing less disrespectful to a dead animal than to deny it the right to be reclaimed by nature, by making a hyper-respectful fetishist toy!

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  133. RocketeerAndRoll
    April 11, 2011 at 9:25 pm

    Just so I have this straight…

    You took dirt off a grave.

    A grave of a decorated WWII veteran.

    To paste onto a paper plate for what looks like a project a 4 year old would make.

    So you can…sell this…to someone.

    Can I use the unicorn horn to jab you in the eye, oh mysterious grave dirt looter?

    Thumb up Thumb down +1

  134. kultakutri
    April 14, 2011 at 1:15 am

    Destroy it with fire. All of it. I wonder whether I had ever seen such a wtf fest before.

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  135. Maman Brigitte
    April 15, 2011 at 1:02 pm

    Thumb up Thumb down +5

  136. Blue Pearl
    April 29, 2011 at 6:19 pm

    I actually think the cat clock is incredibly clever. However, its cleverness combined with its somewhat … simplistic? cartoonish? … rendering of a cat makes me wonder if the clever part of it is actually original. But I still likey.

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  137. peglakanta
    March 22, 2012 at 10:46 am

    the cat-computer parts-clock is actually pretty awesome.

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  138. Ravyncrow
    March 22, 2012 at 7:00 pm

    Rat Fascinator: Want!
    Holah: ?Que? (don’t know how to do the upside down one here)
    Flappy Pants: Say what?
    Spats: Not so bad.
    Fairy Wings: Looks like she’s backed up to that railing to hold them up … with all that junk attached, I can see why.

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