Clay Achin’
Last February, I breathlessly told you all about my custom clay portrait purchase from Sharie’s Craftworld on Etsy.
This is the photo I sent:
And this is the finished product I received.
I don’t mind teling you that this is among the very greatest things I have ever purchased. I would save this in a fire.
I sincerely hoped that people would avail themselves of Sharie’s clay portraiture services, but I wasn’t sure anyone would. I mean, I’d certainly pay upwards of $100 for a 3-D portrait of myself as Verne Troyer, but not everyone has as refined a palate as I do.
So imagine my delight this week when I received not one but TWO emails from readers who had invested in these heirloom quality portraits.
First, there’s Paul.
This is the picture Paul sent:
Adn this is the finished product:
Paul says he enjoys how the portrait makes him look like a Far Side drawing, and that no one in his family understands why he bought it.
Personally, I like the bright red lips and the fact that he appears to be kissing a golf club. I also take great pleasure in the nose, which looks to have been imported from a portrait of Jamie Farr.
Then there’s Talia.
She wanted a portrait of her fiance for his birthday gift. This is the photo she sent:
And this is the final product:
His reaction was, understandably, a mixture of awe and stunned silence. Her fiance says it’s one of the best gifts he’s ever received and “he is a man that is RARELY impressed by material things.” Talia says they want an entire series of these going forward, including their future wedding photo.
“Sharie was wonderful to work with,” says Talia. “I’m not sure why she made my cat Chinese, but somehow it still works.”
Click here to order your own custom clay pile
April 4, 2011 at 4:35 pm
That last portrait is cartoony in all the right ways. I can’t step into an A-ha music video, but this is the next best thing.
April 4, 2011 at 8:13 pm
What I wanna know is: April, do you think she might donate one to the April’s Army charity event that we want to do?
This is just *so* perfect for us in so many ways.
April 4, 2011 at 4:37 pm
Stop showing me things I want to buy!!! I’m trying to save for an Anna Vanover pet figure and you keep adding more to the list of things I MUST have!
April 4, 2011 at 4:38 pm
Oh man, I want one of these SO MUCH.
Also raise your hand if it took you a minute to remember who Clay Aiken was.
*raises hand*
April 4, 2011 at 4:57 pm
Proud to say I never knew.
April 4, 2011 at 9:02 pm
You can’t have a really snarky “that’s as gay as…” without mentioning Clay Aiken.
And either John Waters, Truman Capote, or Elton John.
April 5, 2011 at 3:51 am
Being bisexual, I don’t really use that phrase, so…
April 5, 2011 at 7:24 am
…A handbag full of rainbows?
April 4, 2011 at 4:38 pm
This is fucking wonderful. I want her to do both my cats. That fiance picture is the best ever.
April 5, 2011 at 4:09 am
I absolutely love it. Sweet fuck. I would love to know how I’d turn out in 3D clay…
April 5, 2011 at 8:33 am
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April 5, 2011 at 4:40 pm
I don’t really want her to do my cats, but I would loooove having her make a clay sculpture of my fat princess of a torbie cat.
April 4, 2011 at 4:38 pm
Bedazzled?! I didn’t see that as an option. Consider me sold.
April 5, 2011 at 12:06 pm
I had to specifically request the gems! She had done another picture with that type of background in the past and I saw it in her store. An excellent decision. -Talia
April 4, 2011 at 4:38 pm
When I get more money I will send a photo of my identical twin and myself just to see how it turns out. I would buy so many of those for friends and family!!!
April 4, 2011 at 5:12 pm
You should see if she’d consider diong a mold of it, so she can cast multiple copies, at a discount per copy. Christmas is solved!
April 4, 2011 at 4:41 pm
I literally “awwwwed”. So that must mean they’re awesome!
April 4, 2011 at 4:44 pm
I love these.
I’m curious now of what I’d receive if I sent a photo of myself at the ren faire (in garb, I am that nerdy) with one of the jousting knights.
April 4, 2011 at 6:12 pm
ZOMG, I was just considering getting one of these done with ME in Ren Faire garb! What are the odds on two of us being that nerdy?
(Although not with a jouster. Possibly with one of the Celts…they always seem to be hanging around me.)
April 4, 2011 at 6:31 pm
If you get one, you MUST share; it’s a new rule on Regretsy.
Here at Regretsy, we’re all about The Rules.
April 4, 2011 at 6:36 pm
I want to do one in garb too! I’m a gypsy and usually wound up being followed by furries. Now THAT would be an interesting picture…
April 4, 2011 at 7:24 pm
Argh… you just reminded me of the year one of my friends forced me to be a jouster groupie along with her. I’m pretty sure that’s a new low in geekdom.
I’m thinking one of my steampunk photos would make for a fun clay portrait.
April 4, 2011 at 7:36 pm
There was someone (a different crafter, but similar craft) who did one of me and my husband in our wedding garb. The plan was that they were going to be cake toppers.
They were horrible. They couldn’t even stand upright and they weighed a pound or two each so they couldn’t even, you know, top the cake. Never mind how they looked. Someday I’ll find a picture.
April 4, 2011 at 8:52 pm
No, you aren’t the only one. I am going to have to make sure I get a good picture of me at the Ren Faire this year!
April 5, 2011 at 7:04 am
Yay for nerdiness! I wanted to do the same for myself.
April 4, 2011 at 4:47 pm
I have huge cheeks and a fragile self image. Otherwise I would buy one for every photo I have of myself.
April 4, 2011 at 4:47 pm
Best gift idea ever!
EVER
April 4, 2011 at 4:47 pm
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April 4, 2011 at 4:49 pm
Seriously enjoyable!
April 4, 2011 at 4:50 pm
I’m also impressed by the way she wrote “depoist” instead of “deposit” in every single sold listing where she uses the word at all. At first I thought it was a copy-and-pasted error, but there’s one in all caps AND one without any cap, so she clearly typed it that way at least twice and thinks that is how it is written. I’m now imagining her saying it aloud, and I like it!
April 4, 2011 at 4:51 pm
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April 4, 2011 at 4:51 pm
It’s so lovely to find someone who just throws so much love and imagination into a project that there is really no way you are not going to love it.
They are so very, spectacularly shiny. The thought of adding rhinestones you would think would just push the limits of awesomeness, but somehow, she pulled it off.
April 4, 2011 at 5:40 pm
I was so struck by the sheer glossiness of them as well.
These just make me crazy happy.
April 4, 2011 at 4:52 pm
I want this. I wish I could afford this. Maybe I’ll start selling plasma, or kidneys.
April 4, 2011 at 4:58 pm
I don’t know about you, but I need my kidneys. You know, for boozin’. Maybe I could sell someone else’s kidneys…
April 4, 2011 at 5:03 pm
You could always sell just a bit of your liver… along with fava beans and a nice chianti.
April 4, 2011 at 6:34 pm
Your avatar really adds that extra something to that statement. You look really happy at the prospect of dinner.
April 4, 2011 at 7:31 pm
I would gladly take your kidney to fund your clay portrait. I might even throw in some cat hair corsages, a vagina pendant, and who knows what else.
April 4, 2011 at 4:52 pm
If only I had spare cash to spend as I pleased! Must stop selling things on etsy that Chinese sweatshops and resellers could supply for less (if you son’t mine pins left in the sides and things that fit “like a glowe” – I can’t believe etsy puts blatant resellers on the front page, especially ones with bad feedback, and I’ll end this rant now) and come up with something like this.
April 4, 2011 at 4:54 pm
this is why i take ambien when i go on regretsy…looking at the before pictures and then the after creations is making me trip balls..you can see the people actually morph into their terrifying portraits when you’re high as shit
April 4, 2011 at 6:30 pm
I’m using a combo of beer and weed and getting the same effect. It’s also making me wonder who would be cooler to see one of these made into, Boba Fett, Leatherface, Snake Plissken, or Alex from “A Clockwork Orange”
April 4, 2011 at 6:40 pm
Now I’m thinking it would be cool to get album covers done. Iron Maiden “Killers”, The Beatles “Rubber Soul”, AC/DC “Highway To Hell”. . .Damn, I got a lot of shit hanging on my walls, I NEED one of these.
April 4, 2011 at 8:45 pm
Alex from “A Clockwork Orange” would be so amazing!
April 5, 2011 at 5:02 am
Carter, Did you know that kurt russel had an album once? It never got released. But they did release two tracks as a sort of promo for radio stations. My quasi-boyfriend’s bff found it! it is damn amazing.
April 4, 2011 at 4:55 pm
This is awesome! I might save up and have ones made of our cats. Yeah, I’m that kind of dork!
April 4, 2011 at 5:11 pm
Don’t worry, I want one of my whole family. That includes me, my husband and our cat and dog.
April 4, 2011 at 5:02 pm
the absolute best thing about your portrait is the way your arm appears to come up from behind your shoulder.
April 4, 2011 at 5:19 pm
Oh, that’s an arm? I thought it was a hockey stick with a fingerless glove on it.
April 4, 2011 at 5:03 pm
Those are both awesome. I love the way she recreates the background of the photos too.
April 4, 2011 at 5:22 pm
I didn’t notice the backgrounds until you pointed them out! That’s actually pretty clever.
April 4, 2011 at 10:00 pm
I loved the way she turned the fiance into Dave Grohl!
April 4, 2011 at 5:06 pm
Okay, that second one is seriously the coolest thing EVER.
April 4, 2011 at 5:07 pm
I love the rhinestones on Talia’s fiancé’s portrait!
April 5, 2011 at 11:10 am
But there weren’t any rhinestones in the picture. I wonder if you can special order yourself or a loved one sculpted on a different background.
April 4, 2011 at 5:08 pm
I Soooooooo need to try making clay portraits. Looks fun!
April 4, 2011 at 5:09 pm
Since I am currently working on a production of Little Shop of Horrors… Paul’s portrait makes him look like Orin the Dentist!
April 4, 2011 at 5:12 pm
Clay achin’ is right! I’ve been hurtin’ for one of these ever since you first posted it! SIGH! I’m hoping SO HARD that a loved one sees this and orders me one for my birthday!!
April 4, 2011 at 5:15 pm
fantastic. Now that there are mo images for reference, I now think that the problem with these, is where the eyes are looking. They appear to be looking opposite of the original image.
April 4, 2011 at 5:19 pm
I want one of a flying monkey. That would be amaze-balls.
April 4, 2011 at 5:21 pm
I just want to chime in with the observation that ‘orientalising’ eyes is commonly seen throughout the course of western art history as a culture or an artist begins to realise and then master the fully dimensional and plastic potentials of sculpture. It augers a perceptual breakthrough from two dimensions to three. See for instance, archaic Greek kouros figures.
I went to college.
April 4, 2011 at 8:34 pm
Always nice to know that the massive pile of debt you walk away with is good for something!
April 5, 2011 at 12:37 am
i went to berkeley at a time when quarterly tuition was smaller by far than the average monthly cell phone bill, and rent was about the same.
sigh. i wish everyone could have had that experience.
April 4, 2011 at 8:49 pm
I can make eyes on food with olives.
I went to Le Cordon Bleu.
April 4, 2011 at 9:05 pm
I love their chicken!
(I also loved Julie and Julia.)
April 5, 2011 at 12:42 am
oh, well then you know what i’m saying here, having yourself mastered the potentialities of a fully three dimensional medium, i.e. olives.
April 4, 2011 at 5:21 pm
I think they’re great! I want one!
April 4, 2011 at 5:25 pm
I’m thinking of my seventh-grade school photo, complete with laser beam background, braces, and hair held up with ten cans of White Rain might make an awesome gift for my parents. You know, as a reminder that I turned out okay after all.
April 4, 2011 at 5:25 pm
i didn’t think i could possibly be this delighted about anything
April 4, 2011 at 5:31 pm
This makes me so happy. SO happy. Those are all so great. Paul DOES look like a Far Side cartoon.
…and not to be too big a suck up, but HK has truly pretty eyes.
I can’t believe they are only $100. I want one. Thank you for the reminder on this.
April 4, 2011 at 5:43 pm
ok…$160. Still a deal..all that work!~
…and GLOSSING!
April 4, 2011 at 5:31 pm
What the hell is this? PRAISE?!?
This is REGRETSY: we’re here for snark, dammit! Get on board people!
/these are awesome
But I’m afraid to buy one, it might be *too* much in my likeness. And no one wants that…
April 4, 2011 at 5:32 pm
I especially love the treatment of the hoodie in the second one. What I really want to see is a portrait of Snood Lady — I think the clay art will really bring out the textures of the fabrics.
April 4, 2011 at 7:41 pm
Snood Lady in the Flamingo Hat! I’d contribute to commissioning one of those.
April 4, 2011 at 5:34 pm
I used to play roller derby so I have more than enough photos that are hard to understand just on their own. But transmogrified into a clay portrait? I will eventually do this thing.
April 4, 2011 at 5:34 pm
God this is my favorite art I have ever seen on the internet. Every single one of Sharie’s portraits just makes me so happy to look at. If I ever have the money, I am SO getting one done.
April 4, 2011 at 5:44 pm
I really wish these were cheaper, I want to buy one for all of my friends so they can have a 3D lumpy clay version of themselves grinning at themselves every morning. The best park of waking up…
April 4, 2011 at 7:53 pm
That would just make me want to go back to bed.
April 4, 2011 at 5:51 pm
When I get the last part of my latest stipend for tech theater work, I’m going to commission a portrait of my late dog Maverick surfing in a pool.
I can’t think of a more fitting tribute to a crazy mixed breed who would occasionally do a back flip, whack his tail against the fridge to any music in the house, and open his mouth and tilt his head back during rainstorms to get a drink.
April 4, 2011 at 8:37 pm
When accomplished, you must share! Regretsy is all about the sharing!
April 5, 2011 at 12:42 am
1st: I can’t wait to see this done! Sharing is caring
2nd: Glad to know there are other theater tech’s out there who enjoy regretsy. This site and vodka is my post rehearsal/tech/show ritual.
April 4, 2011 at 5:53 pm
The hands, noses, and ears are really well done. Trouble is, they are someone else’s hands, noses, and ears.
April 4, 2011 at 7:49 pm
She also gives everyone a gratuitous underbite.
April 4, 2011 at 5:55 pm
These are awesome. The next time I have an extra hundred bucks, I am going to order one!
April 4, 2011 at 5:56 pm
I dont have time to do an artists rendering but number 2 there with the cat really looks like Captain Dallas/Tom Skeritt in Alien. If you changed the cat to an orange tabby…..
April 4, 2011 at 8:17 pm
I thought he looked somewhat like Gerry Rafferty.
“He opens the door; he’s got that look on his face….”
Dating myself *horribly*….
April 5, 2011 at 10:30 am
I’m probably 20-odd years behind you (guessing you’re my mom’s age), and yet still, I read your lyrics and this happened:
“And he asks you where you’ve been
You tell him who you’ve seen
And you talk about anything”
April 6, 2011 at 9:00 pm
if you tell me how old your mom is, I’ll tell you how old I am…..
April 6, 2011 at 9:10 pm
“He’s got this dream about buying some land
He’s gonna
Give up the booze and the one night stands
And then he’ll settle down
In a quiet little town
And forget about everything…”
April 4, 2011 at 6:13 pm
Would it be too meta for her to do a clay portrait of the pastel portrait my mother had done of me when I was 4 years old?
April 4, 2011 at 6:23 pm
That would be a level 4 clay pile! Do it! Do it now!
April 4, 2011 at 6:39 pm
Too meta…COOL, you mean!
April 4, 2011 at 6:24 pm
If I had extra money, I would buy one in a heartbeat. Me and my sisters need to split this 3 ways and get one for Mom on xmas.
April 4, 2011 at 6:29 pm
I really want one of these.
But I’m scared that the finished product will end up being prettier than the original picture.
April 4, 2011 at 7:54 pm
I THOUGHT THAT WAS THE POINT
April 5, 2011 at 1:02 am
I’m afraid of that too. Actually it’s a reasonable possibility.
April 4, 2011 at 6:32 pm
My fav is the fiance one. Most particularly that the now-Chinese cat has acquired an owl’s beak.
April 4, 2011 at 6:42 pm
I have a cat that actually really does look like an owl so it would work for me.
Damn, I want one!!!
April 4, 2011 at 6:33 pm
I sooooo want one of these. Dammit.
April 4, 2011 at 6:39 pm
Somehow I think I could send a pic of my dog – dubbed the “Worlds Dumbest Rottweiler” and it would somehow come back in clay looking like the “Worlds Most Genius Rottweiler”.
I guess I need to do this!
April 4, 2011 at 6:45 pm
I love the cat and fiance portrait. Guess I’ll be saving up for one of my kitty.
April 4, 2011 at 6:49 pm
OMFG I know this girl! Ahahahaha! Yay!
http://www.etsy.com/listing/68153717/3-d-clay-portrait-dan-deanna
April 4, 2011 at 7:07 pm
I want to meet the lady who makes these…
April 4, 2011 at 7:09 pm
Pauls is my favorite, the look he has in his eyes is basically daring you to make fun of him for this. Purely epic in my opinion.
April 4, 2011 at 7:10 pm
Please tell me I’m not the only person who thinks Paul looks like Steve Coogan.
http://www.imdb.com/media/rm1155826944/nm0176869
I’ve had plans of contacting this artist since HK shared her awesome work! I was just thinking about it in car yesterday after I took a picture of my brother’s dog’s butt with sunglasses. A bit clique, but he will absolutely love it!
April 4, 2011 at 7:13 pm
Screw bronzing baby booties, I am so getting one of these for my girl
April 4, 2011 at 7:18 pm
I have the strange urge to order one of Tyra Banks.
April 4, 2011 at 9:51 pm
DO IT.
April 4, 2011 at 7:30 pm
I am, without a doubt, getting a portrait done of me and my boyfriend in about a month from this woman for our 5 year anniversary. I’m going to be unemployed, but i’m going to buy it as soon as possible, so that when I’m truly broke later, I won’t be able to NOT buy it. Thanks for reminding us how awesome this is!
April 4, 2011 at 7:48 pm
I know where my tax refund is going….
April 4, 2011 at 8:03 pm
I saw the magic word in her listing LAYAWAY !!! One WILL be mine. Now to find the perfect picture… Thinking about getting someone famous.. then having April Auction it off for charity?
April 4, 2011 at 8:07 pm
I want one of these with my dogs. I have corgis. I somehow think their ears will be so AWESOME in this medium.
April 4, 2011 at 9:53 pm
Yes, but corgi ears look awesomely cute anyway. I can’t imagine how awesome a clay corgi portrait would be.
April 4, 2011 at 9:56 pm
Keep it away from windows or the breeze will carry your house away.
April 4, 2011 at 8:13 pm
I am so stoned, and this is absolutely dying laughing funny/heart warming. I WANT ONE WITH MY TAX RETURN. Oh god what picture could i send in…?
April 4, 2011 at 8:17 pm
Oh what sweet anticipation to look at the submitted photo and then slowww-ly scroll down. I laughed, I lost control of my bladder, passed a little gas and also choked on my spit.
Brilliance!!
April 4, 2011 at 8:24 pm
That’s just not the kind of artistic vision you encounter every day.
April 4, 2011 at 8:28 pm
I just convo-ed her, I’m going to get one for my daughter and her fiance, they’re getting married this year. I think they’d love it. Thanks!
April 4, 2011 at 9:26 pm
This picture confuses me. Gotta lay off the cheap wine.
April 4, 2011 at 10:09 pm
My first thought was “Why does the person on the left have a second pair of sunglasses on top of their head?” My next thought was “Wait, what?”
April 5, 2011 at 6:10 am
what a pair!
April 4, 2011 at 8:45 pm
These will create quite the buzz on antiques roadshow 2137
April 4, 2011 at 9:27 pm
Can someone please request a portrait for 4 people? I really want to know what could be in this spot instead!!
http://www.etsy.com/listing/69908136/a-one-of-a-kind-custom-3-d-clay-portrait
April 4, 2011 at 9:28 pm
Forget the clay portrait–I’m ordering Talia’s boyfriend. Yesss!!
April 4, 2011 at 9:55 pm
she doesnt ship internationally!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
April 4, 2011 at 10:40 pm
I was tired, and slightly grumpy. I now feel on the verge of giggles.
I don’t know if that was the mission, but it is accomplished.
April 4, 2011 at 11:19 pm
I didn’t really get the appeal of these at first, and then I saw this one.
Now I agree with the rest of you that these are magical and I must have one.
April 4, 2011 at 11:57 pm
that cat does look like an owl, it’s not just me right?
April 5, 2011 at 1:05 am
I would love to see one of the reborn monkey-baby-bigfoot thing.
April 5, 2011 at 5:09 am
I would like to point out for anyone that has missed it that Carter West suggested further up this thread that there should be one of Snake Plisken.
Ceramic mold of your fiancee and cat? $160
Ceramic mold of kurt russel in leather and an eyepatch? PRICELESS.
April 5, 2011 at 5:53 am
Wow. Paul is HOT. <3
April 5, 2011 at 9:37 am
Best comment ever.
April 5, 2011 at 9:37 am
How did I miss this post??
Well, regardless, Sharie really was nice to work with. This is by far my most treasured addition to the house. Well worth every red cent.
And I love the suggestion to have her do wedding portraits. I think I’ll know when I meet the right girl when she says to this idea, “Yes, yes. A million times yes!”
April 6, 2011 at 2:18 am
ummmm hello! I’m over here! = )
May 16, 2011 at 11:50 am
Hello to everyone that likes my work thank you
I just wanted to tell Paul Im glad you will treasure your portrait because thats all any artist could hope for
Thanks to everyone……Sharies Craft World
April 5, 2011 at 10:37 am
3 year anniversary with my guy this year… wonder if a portrait of him as a gift would make or break this relationship…
April 6, 2011 at 3:38 pm
Either way, you’ll know.
April 5, 2011 at 11:08 am
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
April 5, 2011 at 11:09 am
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
April 5, 2011 at 12:21 pm
Hello everyone, Talia here. I just have to say “THANK YOU” for the compliments on this piece. In addition to being wonderfully unique, my fiance’s reaction to the gift confirmed the fact that I am marrying the right guy… I really did enjoy working with Sharie. She is a kind person and she takes her work very seriously. If you want in on one you’d better put a deposit down ASAP. Also know that it will take you about a month or so to get it after you order it. Oh yeah, normally she does a one or two color background – the rhinestones were a special request on my part!
April 5, 2011 at 4:36 pm
I WANT ONE REAL BAD. Might have to purchase myself a birthday gift from this woman.
April 5, 2011 at 4:57 pm
Dang. If I only had the extra money to blow on this. There is an amazing picture of me when I’m about 9 years old wearing a ridiculous costume for my jazz recital, and I look so damned happy and whimsical in it. My shirt is covered in a sequin rainbow, and I’m wearing a newsboy cap covered in rainbow-colored stars. I am also wearing fingerless gloves (although I don’t think they show in the photo, but dang-it they still count). It would make such a fantastic 3D clay portrait!
April 5, 2011 at 5:49 pm
I think I might send a picture of my kids. Seriously. One holding Legos or robots, the other with his sippy cup, and WAIT FOR THE MAGIC!
April 10, 2011 at 3:06 pm
This woman’s work is my absolute favorite. I’ve never purchased anything from etsy before, but was finally moved to. I’ve put down my deposit for a portrait of me and my wife. I can’t wait.