BIG LEGAL SOUNDING UPDATE
Dear Julie,
I’m afraid we are going to have to agree to disagree on this one!
Your Instant Collection appeared on Etsy’s front page, and Fair Use permits me to show what you are selling and comment on it. I don’t have to pay to link to you or discuss your work.
But you know that already, you little scamp. Yes you do! Because your vintage finds and instant collections of crap on barn wood are all over the internet! In fact, a brief Google search shows that you are quite pleased to be featured –uncompensated– for favorable reviews of your work.
That particular story contained five pictures of your work, and your logo. I’d post the whole thing, but I don’t have $5,000.
Here you are on We Love Indie. ($4000)
Here you are on The Style Files ($5000)
Here you are on Hello Cotton (just a thumbnail, so probably only about $500)
Unless you’re billing all of them for featuring the things you’re selling on Etsy, I have a pretty good argument that you’re discriminating against me! don’t know why, but it makes big fox tears run down my clown face and dampen my construction paper mustache.
Maybe Fair Use is only for people who say nice things. Or maybe it’s just that I don’t have a lovely, creamy, yummy blog.
In any case, you’ll be hearing from my internet lawyers. Here’s their card.
Stay creamy!
CORRECTION: This post initially contained a link to an ‘Old Red Hen’ blog. Apparently, that’s a completely different ‘Old Red Hen’, also run by someone named Julie. Personally, I think the two of them should sue each other.
In any event I removed the link and I apologize for any confusion.
March 10, 2011 at 7:03 pm
Oh!!! Love It!!
March 11, 2011 at 11:53 am
@Helen – You’re Ice Cold baby!
March 11, 2011 at 12:26 pm
Winning!
March 10, 2011 at 7:04 pm
ohhhhhhh snap!
March 10, 2011 at 7:05 pm
Posting her e-mail is gonna cost you a C-note.
March 10, 2011 at 7:46 pm
And earn you a C-word.
March 11, 2011 at 4:20 am
I’m sure she’s already earned that from several sellers.
March 10, 2011 at 11:14 pm
wow. that cow sure has balls.
March 11, 2011 at 8:08 am
Wouldn’t that make it a bull?
The email certainly is something produced by a bull.
March 11, 2011 at 8:19 am
Making her a bull, and considering the bullshit she’s spreading….
March 10, 2011 at 7:05 pm
I love morons….
March 10, 2011 at 7:34 pm
…Mormons.
March 10, 2011 at 7:05 pm
This has the potential to produce a flounce of such epic proportion we’re going to need to invent a new word for it.
March 10, 2011 at 7:18 pm
F
L
O
U
N
C
EPIC
March 10, 2011 at 7:31 pm
or maybe “flouncepic” but is it said “flounce-pic” or “flounc-epic”?!!!?
March 10, 2011 at 7:52 pm
I believe it’s a “flounc-epic” unless it comes with a picture, in which case the picture would be the “flounce-pic”
March 10, 2011 at 8:05 pm
i think its just called opportunistic. i fought for a while, but calling her a ‘flouncing bribe’ just didn’t hit the spot.
March 10, 2011 at 8:28 pm
actually, that would be twatportunistic but close enough
March 10, 2011 at 9:29 pm
A crime of opportunitwat.
March 10, 2011 at 8:38 pm
‘Nudibranch’ might come close.
http://www.scuba-equipment-usa.com/marine/DEC04/Spanish_Dancer%28Hexabranchus_sanguineus%294.html
March 13, 2011 at 6:31 pm
Vulva of the Sea.
March 10, 2011 at 9:26 pm
How about “flouncee”… She’s our “flouncee”. Especially if you say it with the nasal voice in a very French way, it makes it only better.
March 11, 2011 at 4:46 am
Flounpic.
March 11, 2011 at 6:52 am
I think she is just a big ol’ flouncepot.
March 10, 2011 at 7:05 pm
TAKE THAT YOU CHICKEN-LOVING WHORE!
March 10, 2011 at 7:38 pm
Your comment made my boyfriend ask me why I was giggling madly.
March 10, 2011 at 7:06 pm
P to the owned.
March 10, 2011 at 7:06 pm
I love you, HK. It’s a full-on intarwebz girlcrush 4 realz.
March 11, 2011 at 8:49 am
I concur!
March 10, 2011 at 7:07 pm
you are evil and i love it.
March 10, 2011 at 7:07 pm
I have never understood situations like this- Sellers want to be featured when people say good things but do not want to be featured when bad things are said. Heck, more sales are probably made from Regretsy than all the “Creamy” blogs combined!
March 10, 2011 at 7:26 pm
I looked it up on Google Analytics–just from commenting here, I’ve gotten more referral clicks to my shop than from any other independent site. If I ever got featured–egads! Who knows how much new traffic I might get!
Gift horse, you get that mouth outa my face right now!
March 10, 2011 at 7:30 pm
HA, beastialities!
March 10, 2011 at 7:37 pm
That is the most awesome thing I’ve heard all day — and I write articles about search engine optimization as part of my job.
March 10, 2011 at 7:53 pm
The hits I get from Regretsy far exceed any hits I get off independent blogs.
March 10, 2011 at 9:03 pm
And I JUST made another sale! In the Notes From Buyer, she said she found me through Regretsy!
I’m gonna have to start making stuff for the charity fund next!
March 11, 2011 at 9:30 am
So did I (my customer also mentioned regretsy in the notes from buyer)! If I get a sale from just posting here I can only imagine how many would I get from being featured.
March 10, 2011 at 9:38 pm
Your surreal sheep is badass, may I just say. Idk, every now and then I see something on here and I want it, either because it’s sooo awesome or horribly bad and I want to share it. I’d imagine Etsy gets a lot of business from Regretsy.
March 13, 2011 at 10:37 am
I was thinking about making prints of the Sheep picture, but the largest I can manage on my own would be 8.5″ x 11″. Should I bother?
Maybe that could be my first charity piece!
March 10, 2011 at 10:17 pm
That’s great, Distracted! We should all help each other out.
March 10, 2011 at 11:05 pm
have to say regretsy IS where the advertising is at more than any other place. it just works
and this woman wants to cry about the traffic she’s receiving…heh sad
March 11, 2011 at 12:28 am
Why did I never think to click on the links of peoples names?! Derp!
Me likely Movember
March 13, 2011 at 11:07 am
Thanks Spanky! I just got an inquiry about that piece saying they’d found me on Regretsy. Was that you, or have I come across my first Regretsy-related scam-bot?
March 11, 2011 at 12:54 am
I have only purchased a few things from etsy via regretsy, and have a long list of things I want but can’t afford!! Regretsy makes shopping simple, no need to slog through piles of identical crap on my own. Instead I can read the riveting posts over here mocking the crap and sit and wait for the truly awesome. If I had expendable income my house would contain that stained glass penis and that painting (posted a long time ago) of the naked lady covering her crotch with red mittens while leaning on a bear.
This is my first time reading the comments ( hoping to see if there was some action on the legal front). I’m excited to browse the shops of the commentors!!
March 11, 2011 at 1:42 am
See, you illustrate the points I try to make when I argue with certain friends (some might call them hipsters) about how “nasty” regretsy is or is not:
1. pfft. I repeat myself, sir, pfft (you’d be surprised how effective a well-timed pfft is when “arguing” with hipsters).
2. If you’re a real “artist” or “crafter,” you’re going to welcome criticism with either good humour or a good argument, not a bag of pissy wah-wahs,and you’re going to keep doing your thing regardless, with a hearty “suck it bitches” for good measure, and;
3. besides, you’ll probably get a schwackload (technical term, sorry) of sales out of the deal to boot.
Rant over, time for bed.
PS – good work, Easily (I assume we’re on a first name basis?).
March 11, 2011 at 3:42 am
I was thinking about possibly eventually ranting the same rant, Guavaloo. To this end, you are clearly in breach of my potential copyright and I urge you to cease and desist forthwith and compensate me to the tune of ONE…BILLION…DOLLARS…else I shall have no choice but to nuke your crafting room and curse your ability to upload vintage steampunk tampons to the interwebz, thus making the cyber-experience poorer for us all and for the future generations of whimsicle fucksters who hope to follow us. Pfft.
March 11, 2011 at 7:06 am
I’m seconding the “surreal sheep is badass” comment. I would totally buy it if I had enough money!
March 13, 2011 at 11:09 am
Okay, that’s two that like the original, so perhaps a repro print series would be a good idea?
March 11, 2011 at 8:52 am
Oh ya! I’m proud to be a Regretsy reader and I am proud to sell to anyone who reads Regretsy.
March 11, 2011 at 9:20 am
Same here–lots of traffic linked from here, when I rarely comment. Actually, that’s how I discovered Regretsy, was clicking to see what site was reffering traffic my way. HK Rocks!
March 11, 2011 at 10:05 am
Oh, Surreal Sheep, I want to make you mine. If I had the ability, I’d write an epic love poem to you.
March 13, 2011 at 11:13 am
SHE’S BLOWING YOU ALL KISSES, IN CASE YOU CAN’T TELL THROUGH THE GAS MASK!
March 11, 2011 at 8:04 pm
i have an art-grrl-crush on you now.
March 11, 2011 at 2:04 am
Exactly. Then again I think most of the other blogs that feature etsy shops are only read by other sellers.
March 11, 2011 at 8:49 am
And probably only other sellers who have the “I am an artist, you should be honored to look at my work you pitiful slime!” mentality that’s ever-present on the site. Sad, really.
March 13, 2011 at 11:19 am
I know hardly any REAL artists who are like that. The ones who are usually are untalented posers who can’t take a joke nor criticism. Personally, even if everyone else thought my artwork was crap, it still amuses the hell out of me…
March 11, 2011 at 6:15 am
for realz. As much as I love snark I probably wouldn’t comment or keep coming back if the motto was “all mean all the time.” On nearly every post, right after the “Jesus Christ! My EYES! That is GOD AWFUL” the comments continue on to say “but the this, that, and the other in the store are fantastic!” and people scurry off to and start franticly clicking *add to cart* *add to cart*
March 11, 2011 at 8:15 am
I was just thinking that. Don’t people realize that Regretsy-featured items SELL? I’ve got some friends with Etsy shops and if they ever get featured here I’ll be sure to point that out to them.
Also, I never read Etsy. But I read this site every day. I was tempted to buy these http://www.etsy.com/listing/69632475/vintage-etched-wineport-glasses , but I think I’ll wait and see if the seller chills the fuck out first.
March 11, 2011 at 9:17 am
I wouldn’t bother. After a cursory glance at her shop, I can honestly say that there is nothing there you or I couldn’t pick up ourselves from a charity shop for a pound (or your currency of choice). Seriously. It’s junk that she’s cleaned up and taken pretty photographs of. Definitely not worth however much she’s asking.
March 11, 2011 at 10:47 am
See there you go. She lost a sale. Because seeing “ooh shiny” online and clicking a button is much easier for my lazy ass than browsing thrift stores in case I find a shiny.
So I’d even overpay for it, except that now I don’t like her.
March 11, 2011 at 3:10 pm
Just search ‘vintage etched wine glass’ for lots of (potentially) nice sellers with better prices. I do give ms. snotty-pants props for her photos though…
March 14, 2011 at 11:38 am
There’s the initial flush of embarrassment, then the flow of traffic and cold, hard cash. Theoretically.
March 10, 2011 at 7:07 pm
BAAAAAAAAHHHHHGOOODLORDILOVEYOUTOITTYBITTYPIECES!!! Whoa. That sounded ravenous and scary. Schmeh… It is what it is.
March 10, 2011 at 7:07 pm
LAWL it’s always priceless when people with no legal knowledge at all try to sound like they know what their talking about, especially when a brief Google would show them just how wrong they are
Thank you for allowing us to see how your fine internet lawyers handle things once again!
March 10, 2011 at 11:09 pm
lol i do love how dumb people are to be honest too
i’m afraid this is legally called extortion. especially if she further replies with a threat to pursue criminal legal action. that’s quite a biggie. to which a person can be legally arrested and taken away in hand cuffs. theyll even take mug shots for it.
good luck Julie being butt hurt
March 11, 2011 at 4:01 am
Perhaps she will tape her mugshots to barn wood and make a few bob from the experience. I would be heartily disappointed if she didn’t.
March 11, 2011 at 7:04 am
mug shots are gunna be pricey
March 10, 2011 at 7:07 pm
AHH HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
dumb, dumb dumb
March 10, 2011 at 7:26 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
March 10, 2011 at 7:08 pm
From her vintage store:
“I see the curious look in their eyes when I bring something home that seems to have a soul, a life, a history.”
Why does Mom bring so much shit home all the time?
March 10, 2011 at 7:20 pm
“..something home that seams to have six spiders hanging off of it and smell like pee because I got it from a cat lady’s garage sale.”
March 10, 2011 at 7:31 pm
…and the pee came from the cat lady. See, kids? This item has a soul.
March 10, 2011 at 7:33 pm
and the garage sale NEVER SEEMS TO END!!! so there are lots of “treasures.”
March 10, 2011 at 7:36 pm
It’s an episode of “Hoarders” waiting to happen. They’ll find dead hens buried beneath mountains of “vintage” items. Maybe some children who just got too damn curious.
March 10, 2011 at 7:41 pm
I saw one episode where the lady just couldn’t throw out eggs that were given to her as a birthday present (already weird) because they were “too beautiful” to have eaten. So she kept them. FOR A YEAR.
March 10, 2011 at 7:45 pm
She was probably trying to sell them on Etsy. Not a bad idea, considering. Maybe that’s where this little red hen came from…
March 10, 2011 at 9:57 pm
Maybe the egg-hoarder was trying to make these: http://davescupboard.blogspot.com/2010/06/balut-most-hardcore-bad-assed-hard.html
March 11, 2011 at 7:35 am
When I saw the egg-hoarder episode, all I could think of was how every single Little House book would have the girls given something for Christmas that was “too pretty to eat.” And Mary would sit there being saintly and make Laura feel bad for nibbling a bit of it. And even at seven I sat there going “THIS IS NOT HEALTHY.”
March 11, 2011 at 8:04 am
ADecentBurial: I don’t know why that was so unsettling, even though I’m veg, my mouth waters at Wendy’s Spicy Chicken Sandwich commercials. But that boiled baby chick foot skeeved me the eff out!
March 15, 2011 at 4:19 pm
@ADecentBurial
I will never eat eggs again.
March 10, 2011 at 7:08 pm
I love the smell of hypocrisy in the evening.
Smells like hillbilly bajingo wash.
March 10, 2011 at 7:27 pm
Oh is that what that is…
March 10, 2011 at 7:50 pm
A little bit like used chewing gum, but coming from strange places.
March 10, 2011 at 8:04 pm
Like those delightful crocheted bikinis.
March 10, 2011 at 8:05 pm
I resent the implication that I smell. And I will have you know that I have copyrighted the name “Hillbillybajingowash” and demand royalties whenever any of you use it on this site. $1000 per use sounds fair to me. If not, then I will have to come up with some important sounding legalese bullshit and try to intimidate you while sounding like a total douchebag.
Ah hell, just keep sticking watch parts and octopi on stuff and I will be happy.
Namaste, bitches!
March 10, 2011 at 8:08 pm
You can also call me “#49″ . . .
March 10, 2011 at 10:10 pm
Oh, so *you’re* the infamous # 49.
March 10, 2011 at 8:31 pm
Well Suryanamaskar to you too.
Take your minty freshness and shove it where the sun don’t shine.
Oh wait, you did that already.
March 10, 2011 at 8:49 pm
You had me at “Namaste, bitches!”
March 10, 2011 at 7:08 pm
Okay, so she’s charging $300-1000 to use an image of a $10 “collection” of shit that she found in her back yard? That’s good business.
March 20, 2011 at 6:02 pm
And remember she is a PROFESSIONAL PHOTOGRAPHER or else she would have forgot to wear clothes when she was reflected in that spoon.
March 10, 2011 at 7:08 pm
Boom, roasted!
I love Helen Killer.
March 10, 2011 at 8:03 pm
Ooh–and I love quotes from The Office.
March 10, 2011 at 7:09 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
March 10, 2011 at 7:09 pm
mmmmm Copyright law is so tasty!
March 10, 2011 at 7:10 pm
How exactly does she expect anyone to know when the end of her business day is? How do we know she isn’t an insomniac whose intensive chicken fetish has her taking pictures of chickens 24 hours a day?
March 10, 2011 at 7:17 pm
Or really- what if HK never closes business for Monday, March 14th? In fact, as I recall- *I* haven’t closed business for Monday, March 14th. Therefore, I declare it still open. Forever.
March 11, 2011 at 10:55 am
And of course, as her main source of business is on the internet, and the internet never actually *closes*, then I think it could be argued that she would never actually experience a “close or end of business day” unless her personal web server AND local DNS server AND regional backbone all went belly up at the same time.
What are the odds?
March 10, 2011 at 7:52 pm
She probably spends her business nights hauling barn wood too!
March 10, 2011 at 7:11 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
March 10, 2011 at 7:11 pm
I think there’s a song in here somewhere. I think the chorus should be your loyal followers singing – in flawless operatic voices – “ah nah you din int” and we need someone to rap “can we get a flounce outta this” at several key moments. Just thinking and typing of course, but everything here is copyrighted and therefore MINE MINE MINE! Unless you like it, then I’ll share and we can have fun and be all creamy together.
March 10, 2011 at 7:38 pm
I might just take that last part as sexual harassment–be careful! Don’t be infringin’!
March 11, 2011 at 3:16 pm
“Sexual harassment will not be tolerated.” However, it will be graded…
March 13, 2011 at 11:27 am
See, this is why I should draw more and comment less… I always get out-commented. (Good one.)
March 10, 2011 at 7:12 pm
i’ve been following regretsy since close to the beginning, and i’ve never felt the need to go beyond the solo observe-and-laugh-my-face-off maneuver. but this post has stirred a comment. this is amazing.
March 10, 2011 at 7:14 pm
Witty legaleze gives me a chub
March 11, 2011 at 7:21 am
It gives me the woozies.
March 11, 2011 at 5:54 pm
Careful now, or you’ll turn this into a creamy thread.
March 10, 2011 at 7:14 pm
Did anyone else notice that the descriptions on the first three blogs that HK linked to were identicle? Methinks she wrote the favorable reviews herself for all of them, and THATs the real reason she’s feeling so pecked upon. She didn’t get to write her own unfavorable review!
March 10, 2011 at 7:20 pm
could be sock puppet blogs. wouldn’t be the first time shit like that happens.
March 10, 2011 at 7:34 pm
sock puppets have blogs!!?
March 10, 2011 at 8:15 pm
Not only do Sock Puppets have blogs, but Muppets have eyes! http://muppetswithpeopleeyes.tumblr.com/page/2
Ahhh internet…
March 10, 2011 at 8:34 pm
Make it work the other way!
March 10, 2011 at 7:37 pm
No, say it ain’t so! How will I ever be able to trust what I read on the internet ever again? *sob*
March 10, 2011 at 9:00 pm
Holy shit, that is a serious case of identicle fuckery.
March 10, 2011 at 7:16 pm
And duhhhhhh, it hyperlinked to her etsy site if she’d tried.
March 10, 2011 at 7:16 pm
Oddly enough, I have a set of 6 iced tea spoons that exactly match her “vintage” one with the feather. I got them at the local dollar store.
March 11, 2011 at 12:03 am
Pretty sure that Michael’s has that watch face in a collection of crafting notions… Somehow I don’t think this listing had anything to do with her supposed style cultivating “restraint” and idolatry of Coco Chanel …
March 14, 2011 at 11:41 am
BUT DO THEY HAVE FEATHERS?!
March 10, 2011 at 7:17 pm
so is this a serious legal notice, is this a clever ruse to get more publicity, an attempt to extort a little cash since she is selling crap, or are her panties just in a bunch because we don’t taker her serious as an artist?
March 10, 2011 at 8:48 pm
I was thinking the same thing – Regretsy is KNOWN to sell, so why not compose an indignant letter?
March 10, 2011 at 9:48 pm
Yes!
March 10, 2011 at 7:17 pm
I love that she thinks she licensed the images to Etsy. Odd that, considering she’s paying Etsy, not the other way around. But then again, if she’s stupid enough to think three random items she photographed on barn wood is art/vintage/sell able, then she’s stupid enough to not understand the way Etsy works.
March 10, 2011 at 8:04 pm
She SOLD the 3 random items today. Sigh.
March 10, 2011 at 8:20 pm
Honestly that’s the sad thing, she does take excellent photographs. But what she’s selling is just thrift store and estate sale tat, which she takes great photo’s of, and sells for 50 times their actual worth. If she was selling prints of the photo’s, then maybe that would be worthwhile art, but what people with more money than sense are buying is the vintage “dream” her photographs evoke.
It’s the only reasoning I can come up with as to why anyone would spend $15 for a spoon, a feather and a watch face. When I can’t sell the crafts I make myself… maybe I need to start trawling thrift stores for old junk!
March 10, 2011 at 10:02 pm
How many people do you think think they are getting the picture and not the items? Thats what makes me the saddest.
March 11, 2011 at 1:13 am
Exactly this – when I first saw the post, I didn’t see what was so awful about it (while I wouldn’t pay $15 for a print of a spoon and a feather, it was a nice photo and I could see buying a similar photo if it was priced a little lower). Then I realized that no, she wasn’t selling the photo – she was selling the spoon and the feather. Then it was just stupid, because what are you going to do with a spoon and a feather?
March 12, 2011 at 11:36 pm
Geeze, I didn’t even realize until now that it was the items and not the photo.
March 10, 2011 at 9:13 pm
Well, damn. But what do you bet that they sold cause someone saw them on Regretsy? That would be lovely and creamy irony.
March 10, 2011 at 9:19 pm
And I’d also like to point out, that yes, the photograph is lovely, except for the reflection of the photographer in the spoon. Maybe she should rethink her other love of photography (as she says in her “featured artist” article.)
March 11, 2011 at 4:18 am
March 11, 2011 at 12:05 am
Apparently *someone* thought they were sell able. I’d love to know who actually paid for that crap. They need to be slapped upside the head. Then again, I have lots of random crap lying around, maybe I could sell some of it to them.
March 10, 2011 at 7:18 pm
You had me at “little scamp.” Tears of joy!
Funny how it didn’t occur to her you might do your homework. Always best to size up your opponent before throwing a limp-wristed girly punch.
March 10, 2011 at 7:25 pm
Wait a minute. Why did she waste the money on a copyright for photos of items she didn’t even make?
I am 100% sure you can call a meth investigation. I say “meth” because in the land where chickens are cool, meth is just awesome. I should know. I live here.
T_T
March 10, 2011 at 7:26 pm
(Didn’t realize my ‘scamp’ response didn’t carry over so here it is)
Scamp sounds like just another disease from that land…
March 10, 2011 at 7:35 pm
Hahahah, I wondered what this had to do with scamps. (which also sounds like a disease)
March 10, 2011 at 7:35 pm
Now why would anyone think for even a second that Regretsy does their homework? Now, if she was dealing with a big publication, like, say, Glamour, for instance, now THERE’S a place that does their homework!
March 11, 2011 at 6:43 am
Touche!
March 14, 2011 at 11:43 am
I think I love you.
March 10, 2011 at 7:22 pm
are they gonna chicken out if we get a lawyer
March 10, 2011 at 7:51 pm
HA: CHICKEN OUT! I see wut u did thurrrrr.
March 11, 2011 at 9:30 am
Nah, just hen-peck us to death with silly emails.
btw, invaderhorizongreen, we look like we were separated at birth. do you want to be Arnold Schwarzenegger or Danny DeVito?
March 11, 2011 at 8:29 pm
well ill be back does this help
March 10, 2011 at 7:23 pm
Don’t you know that the little red hen doesn’t share?
I do, said that dog.
I do, said the cat.
I do, said the duck.
I’m loving this. I hope you keep up updated with what will surely follow. I’m sure once a little red hen’s feathers are ruffled, they won’t be easily soothed.
The term ‘licensed to Etsy’ is annoying also-nothing is licensed to Etsy. And I’m sure that Etsy, in all their “we are just a venue” glory, would disagree with that statement as well. Either she is misguided, or she’s talking out of her ass, trying to sound smarter than she is. I’m going with both.
March 10, 2011 at 7:27 pm
Seriously, Etsy is just a place that they can post their sales. People don’t cry about their junk being “licensed to Ebay” or anything.
March 10, 2011 at 7:24 pm
Ah, a witty arse kicking…thanks HK! When I grow I, I wanna be just like you! ^_^
March 10, 2011 at 7:28 pm
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March 10, 2011 at 7:26 pm
What a load of craparoo.
HK, I love you a bushel and a peck.
March 11, 2011 at 7:10 am
… and a hug around the neck
March 11, 2011 at 1:28 pm
Ha! It’s like in “Who Framed Roger Rabbit when Roger can’t resist finishing “shave and a haircut…two bits!” Ya just can’t leave it hanging.
Trivia: HK was one of the voice actors in the Roger Rabbit movies.
And now the circle is complete.
March 10, 2011 at 7:27 pm
What a whiny little bitch.
March 10, 2011 at 7:30 pm
I WAS going to say, “Maybe we can just stick that phucky ducky photoshop cat face on yet another shitty thing,”…
…but what you said was WAY better. And creamier. And I like it more on GP.
But you already knew that. Thanks for all the laffs, you smart ass!
March 10, 2011 at 7:30 pm
HK you are simply my hero – this is too freakin’ funny.
“A Spoon A Face and A Feather
Instant Collection of Vintage/Natural Found Objects”
Why thank you – and I’ll pay 10 of your US dollars for that ‘instant’ collection. WTF?
March 10, 2011 at 8:01 pm
“A Spoon A Face and A Feather” sounds like a typical Friday night for me, minus the shipping charges.
March 10, 2011 at 8:50 pm
I am picturing naughty times? How does that work…
March 11, 2011 at 2:14 pm
We use barnwood paddles.
March 10, 2011 at 7:31 pm
CRAP ON BARN WOOD sounds like an expletive.
March 10, 2011 at 10:00 pm
It is now.
March 11, 2011 at 7:41 am
CRAPONBARNWOOD, WOMAN! What are you doing in the hen house in your pageant dress?
March 10, 2011 at 7:32 pm
SAY WHAT?!
March 10, 2011 at 7:33 pm
That makes me want to choke the chicken.
That statement could go either way, but I’m gonna stick with it.
March 10, 2011 at 7:33 pm
Roflcopter wow, if I didn’t know any better I’d say she was from the Italian side of my family the way she just attempted extortion up there. Then I realize how epically she failed and I say “no, no that’s no relation to me.”
Such BS, you credited her for her work by linking it to her site. By most standards that holds up in a court of law It’s not like you’re stealing her work and claiming it as your own (who in their right mind would).
March 11, 2011 at 7:06 am
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March 10, 2011 at 7:34 pm
I was fooling around with Illustrator, and now I have the perfect image for Flounce Time:
(the manufacturer of this fine steam-powered time device is the firm of Cryabeetus & Flounce of London)
March 10, 2011 at 7:37 pm
O_O!!!!!!!
March 10, 2011 at 7:55 pm
Needs more octopus, or cowbell, or maybe more octopus playing cowbell. You decide.
March 10, 2011 at 8:14 pm
I said illustrator, not photoshop…
March 11, 2011 at 9:44 am
text needs to be larger……jus sayin’……
March 10, 2011 at 7:34 pm
Dear Helen,
I am the creator of the word, “THE”. I have noted that you have used this word several times on your site without paying the proper liscening fees.
Please send one red hen to me immediately and we’ll call it even!
March 10, 2011 at 7:37 pm
Sorry, I have prior art on that word. Also any other words that use the letters Z Q and the umlaut.
March 10, 2011 at 7:43 pm
Princess, my unibrowed daughter is named Umlaut, and I am incredibly offended that you would dare to purchase her name.
March 10, 2011 at 7:44 pm
And I’m Mexican, so I already got the enye.
March 10, 2011 at 7:52 pm
Someone doesn’t like Mexicans.
March 11, 2011 at 8:07 am
I thought she was Irish.
March 10, 2011 at 9:26 pm
And I have a pet snail named En-space. Fork it over.
March 10, 2011 at 7:39 pm
“The fair use defense rests on the theory that an individual should be excused due to public policy reasons such as the copying benefits society due to educational purposes or if the copying is considered commentary, criticism, news reporting or scholarly reports.”
Regretsy definitely benefits society. End.
March 10, 2011 at 7:41 pm
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March 10, 2011 at 7:46 pm
IS THAT A FLOUNCE? IS IT?!
Don’t toy with me…
March 10, 2011 at 7:47 pm
I’m in a highly excitable state, and I just don’t think I could handle fake flouncing right now.
March 11, 2011 at 1:01 pm
No, flouncing or fake flouncing of any kind, just drunk unclear posting! (runs and hides)
March 10, 2011 at 7:43 pm
So regretsy, I notice you’ve posted both my username and my avatar over and over, as if you’re flagrantly trying to promote my website and personal existence. Because you haven’t actually threatened my artsy commercial posturings, I’ll limit your legal repercussions to a $600 fee and a minimum “vintage” word count of thirty per page. Vintage vintage vintage. You’re welcome.
March 10, 2011 at 7:54 pm
Helen, I have no money but I can throw you a vintage, vintage, vintage, vintage, vintage, vintage, vintage, vintage, vintage, vintage, vintage, vintage, vintage, vintage, vintage, vintage, vintage, vintage, vintage, vintage, vintage, vintage, vintage, vintage, steampunk, vintage, vintage, vintage, vintage. Good luck raising the cash. You’ll probably have to sell a tampon hat or some such on ebay.
March 10, 2011 at 7:55 pm
Exactly. My name appears on each of your keyboards without my permission. I accept only Paypal, thank you.
March 10, 2011 at 7:47 pm
I find it humorous that she wants you to pay a licensing fee and remove the image. I was certain that by paying a licensing fee you were then entitled you use the image you paid for.
March 11, 2011 at 6:46 am
My thoughts exactly. I’m not sure she would want you to pay the licensing fee – then you could do whatever you want with her image!!!!!!!!!
March 11, 2011 at 2:54 pm
Including wiping your tukhus!
March 10, 2011 at 7:50 pm
I have a serious crush on both you and Bronc.
March 10, 2011 at 8:02 pm
theoldredhen must have sold an instant collection of her brain cells by accident.
March 11, 2011 at 2:13 am
Vintage brain cells!
March 11, 2011 at 11:06 am
I, too, used to have a vintage collection of brain cells.. Then I took up drinking and slaughtered them all in a whimsicle wash of fuckery, hot-glued to a chunk of an old barn.
March 10, 2011 at 8:04 pm
“It makes big fox tears run down my clown face and dampen my construction paper mustache.”
This made me chuckle. You should sue for the damage to your lovingly-crafted steampunk paper mustache.
March 10, 2011 at 8:05 pm
How the hell do these sellers not realize that their garbage is getting sold ten times faster by being featured on Regretsy? I’m going to start putting random stupid shit in my Etsy shop just so I can be featured on Regretsy and start making sales. Maybe some poop shaped soap or something.
Fools.
March 11, 2011 at 7:15 am
sold!!!!!!!!!
March 11, 2011 at 1:01 pm
Thank the sweet Lord baby Jesus. You are in luck.
http://www.onestopcandle.com/thestore/prods/CM779.html
March 10, 2011 at 8:11 pm
Well, you WOULD get a cease and desist letter from someone too oblivious to photoshop their reflection out of the spoon.
We all should have seen this coming.
March 10, 2011 at 8:14 pm
My only other comment:
Bitch, please.
March 10, 2011 at 8:19 pm
I love firm name… i think you have that printed on shirts and sell them for charity.
I also love it when a half baked hill billy dreams get crushed, it makes me cry double rainbows.
March 10, 2011 at 8:24 pm
If you really said that to her, you’re my hero forever.
March 10, 2011 at 8:24 pm
Oooh somebody just got a barn wood paddling
March 10, 2011 at 8:37 pm
I hope she got a nice bunch of splinters imbedded in there
March 11, 2011 at 7:44 am
Don’t arouse me in connection with this barnwood. For shame.
March 11, 2011 at 2:16 pm
Many shameful things are arousing. Like chickens.
March 10, 2011 at 8:24 pm
The only thing that would have made this better is if you would have signed it: Namaste Bitches.
March 10, 2011 at 8:29 pm
PS. At least it wasn’t another “seize and desist” letter.
March 10, 2011 at 8:31 pm
So I’m assuming she’s represented by the world famous law firm of Cheetum, Cheetum and Howe?
March 10, 2011 at 8:51 pm
Nah, she’s represented by Dewey, Cheetum and Howe!
March 10, 2011 at 8:35 pm
Oh yeah, that chick got cold-cocked.
March 10, 2011 at 8:37 pm
lol, wasn’t this chick just a featured seller on etsy the other day?
QUICK! Run to goodwill and buy some crap so I can be a featured seller!
Where the fuck is my barnwood?….
March 10, 2011 at 8:38 pm
Wow. Just wow.
March 10, 2011 at 8:41 pm
lol, I remembered shit right for once.
http://www.etsy.com/storque/spotlight/featured-seller-theoldredhen-12356/
March 10, 2011 at 8:47 pm
Well that explains why she thinks she is more important than she really is.
March 10, 2011 at 9:06 pm
I agree with whoever was saying she is great at photography and selling the vintage dream.
March 10, 2011 at 9:32 pm
Yup.
March 10, 2011 at 9:33 pm
I expect my C&D momentarily.
March 10, 2011 at 10:06 pm
God I can’t stand her.
March 11, 2011 at 9:52 am
“There’s so much you can find out about a person by looking deep into their eyes, however cliché that may sound. It’s easier to do with a camera — less invasive perhaps…..”
What if when you look into their eyes, you see a scary woman staring through a giant soul-stealing box?
March 11, 2011 at 2:17 pm
How does photography make something invasive less invasive?
March 10, 2011 at 8:43 pm
*dies*
People are so…I don’t have words!
March 10, 2011 at 8:46 pm
Winner winner, chicken dinner!
Ah..Regretsy…the snark that goes down like a smoothe ale.
You should sue her for extortion.
March 10, 2011 at 8:47 pm
It infuriates me that this cunt gets so much publicity! I hope a real old red hen pecks her eyes out!
March 10, 2011 at 10:02 pm
HAHAHA! You called her a cunt.
March 10, 2011 at 10:44 pm
Yeah, I have my moments…. It does get to me that she gets so much attention cause she knows how to hold and angle a camera and point it at “vintage” crap. Yay for rusty frickin’ spoons!! I guess! Maybe I’m just wasting my time with handmade items.
March 10, 2011 at 8:50 pm
Regretsy takes a special kind of person to run.
I really enjoy how Helen Killer did not stand idly by as some jackass tried to serve her with a “cease and desist”. Most of us would shake in our whimsical space boots at such a threat, but not her. In my opinion this is the funniest reply email she’s done to date. Not only is it well thought out, but it is a total slap in the face to the red hen twat.
Bravo Helen, for saying what the rest of us aren’t creative enough to!
March 10, 2011 at 8:58 pm
Take a picture of the “owed” money stacked on a piece of barnwood and email it to her!
March 10, 2011 at 9:15 pm
I was doing my pic as you posted this–but your idea was so much better!! I wish I had thought of that! Bummer.
March 10, 2011 at 9:41 pm
Can someone make an image of this please. I love it!
March 11, 2011 at 8:22 am
I like this so hard.
March 10, 2011 at 9:08 pm
i love you.
March 10, 2011 at 10:06 pm
I love you, you hippie
March 10, 2011 at 9:10 pm
This changes everything. Suddenly, I love the letter. I can use my hobby lobby coupon to get it framed.
March 10, 2011 at 9:16 pm
I even think they can put it in a barnwood frame.
March 10, 2011 at 9:31 pm
This is joy. Someone please make this image into a corny pretentious treasury, please.
March 10, 2011 at 9:31 pm
“The Old Red Hen Lays an Egg”, 30# luxury paper on barn wood, $250
March 10, 2011 at 11:22 pm
I bet Steotch could make a fine cross-stitch of that cease and desist letter on a weathered wood background.
March 10, 2011 at 9:14 pm
If that chick actually created anything she (might) have something to say. In this case she has no intellectual property, design or anything other than a box of crap that should have stayed at the thrift store.
Ebay wants their crap back.. get off Etsy loser.
March 10, 2011 at 11:29 pm
Agreed. She’s not selling the pictures. She’s selling the crap IN the pictures. That makes the downloading and viewing the picture a requirement. She can’t sue every visitor to etsy that downloads the images, and downloading is unavoidable. She gives up those rights when she puts the pictures online without watermarking or otherwise notifying people of her claim.
Were she selling the pictures and giving the crap away for free, she’d have a better case. Not a MUCH better case, but if she claimed the picture was copyrighted art, then she needs to identify it as such. Folks who sell photographs generally watermark their images and edit the metadata as well. She has made zero effort to do any of this.
Alas she’s benefiting from the Streisand effect, but so is everyone who manages to sell the crap featured on regretsy.
It is my dream to make something crappy enough to be featured here.
March 11, 2011 at 6:16 am
Pardon my ignorance, but what is the Streisand effect?
March 11, 2011 at 7:01 am
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Streisand_effect
March 11, 2011 at 7:37 am
I only heard of the phrase from my hubby a few weeks ago …
“The Streisand effect is a primarily online phenomenon in which an attempt to hide or remove a piece of information has the unintended consequence of publicizing the information more widely. It is named after American entertainer Barbra Streisand, whose 2003 attempt to suppress photographs of her residence inadvertently generated further publicity.”
From: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Streisand_effect
March 11, 2011 at 7:04 am
HK is definitely protected from an infringement claim, but only because what she’s doing is fair use. No registration or mark is required to claim copyright, just to get punitive damages in court.
March 10, 2011 at 9:21 pm
…wish I could throw a pointless cease and decist at someone…this girl is getting sooo much exposure right now, she’s either super un-grateful or she’s trying to stretch out her 15 minutes on Regretsy for all the hits she can get.
March 10, 2011 at 9:25 pm
How does one link their etsy shop to their username here? By gosh I think it’s brilliant, although since I have no garbage, barnwood, or crap to sell, I’m sure my little children’s bracelets will go unnoticed… :/
March 11, 2011 at 5:13 am
It’s in your user profile.
I’d link to my store but (a)it’s empty right now and (b) I’d have to be more polite here because then people would know who I am…
March 11, 2011 at 12:12 pm
testing
March 11, 2011 at 12:14 pm
testing again
March 11, 2011 at 12:15 pm
success! Now to find some barnwood…
March 11, 2011 at 6:08 pm
Hello?! Since when do Regretsians penalise shop owners for being rude? Wear your snark proudly, Princess.
March 10, 2011 at 9:25 pm
I’ve been reading Regretsy for ages but was always to lazy to make an account to comment. I just had to say thank you Helen, you have restored my faith in humanity, justice, and all things not craptastic. Your response to the crazy is golden. GOLDEN!
March 10, 2011 at 9:57 pm
Its nothing less than Solid Gold
March 10, 2011 at 9:29 pm
“Brandt can’t watch or he has to pay an extra hundred.”
Thanks for reminding me how much I miss The Pirate Bay’s snarky takedown responses.
March 10, 2011 at 9:29 pm
Just Saying
March 10, 2011 at 9:30 pm
Well my pic didn’t attach right, looks like Moi beat me to it anyway
March 10, 2011 at 9:42 pm
March 11, 2011 at 2:20 pm
BAHAHAHA ride that horsey Oprah
March 10, 2011 at 9:50 pm
Oh yeah!
March 10, 2011 at 9:51 pm
Who pays $1000 each time to use a crappy picture on their site? Is she on crack?
March 10, 2011 at 11:32 pm
only if its on barnwood
March 10, 2011 at 9:52 pm
another lurker forced into commenting because people haz the dumb! Can’t wait for the next installment…
March 10, 2011 at 9:53 pm
Hey suck eggs The Old Red Hen!!!!!!!!!!
But ofcourse only organically farmed and free range ones laid on fucking barn wood!!!!!
Ms Winchell you’re wholegrain awesome!!!!!!!!!!!
March 10, 2011 at 9:56 pm
Please let her respond. Oh please let her respond.
March 11, 2011 at 2:21 pm
Let’s all follow her on Twitter!
March 10, 2011 at 9:58 pm
And how on earth can you call yourself a “creator” Old Red Hen???????
FFS
March 10, 2011 at 10:12 pm
When are these angry sellers going to learn? If you write an angry e-mail, we’re all going to see it here anyways.
March 10, 2011 at 10:14 pm
That’s funny because like 2 days ago they had a really crazy thread on the Etsy blog or whatever it is called about copyright infringement!
March 10, 2011 at 10:15 pm
Burn.
March 10, 2011 at 10:19 pm
March 10, 2011 at 10:22 pm
Poor girl seems to have forgotten the cardinal rule of customer service: have a sense of humor about yourself. If she had just done that, we might have all cheered for her and her shop. Too late for that now.
I’m just glad she had her clothes on when she took that picture. I shudder a little whenever I see a reflective item for sale on any website.
March 11, 2011 at 4:39 am
I have this little chat with myself every time I decide to photograph my work halfway through getting dressed in the morning. And I thank HK most sincerely for teaching me this very valuable lesson.
March 10, 2011 at 10:59 pm
YES, yet another legalese lawl was just what the doctor ordered for tonight. Lifts my spirits to read such a hilariously misinformed diatribe.
March 10, 2011 at 11:29 pm
whenever anyone gets upset in the forums about people using their photos, everyone tells them to mock up a bluff *cease and desist* letter
So thats all this is. She knows as well as we do that the letter is a crock, she is just hoping that HK is too stoopid to know that.
Ha!! as if
March 11, 2011 at 1:55 am
Bugger… She forgot to mention the copyrighted use of the phrase instant collection – that would bring her another few quid even if she just charges $100 per use.
March 11, 2011 at 8:17 am
Bah! No one uses squid as currency anymore! Bitch, please.
March 11, 2011 at 9:22 am
just read your reply and realized, I’m so glad no one in Ireland says Bah, not even bitches:), well… maybe sheep…
March 12, 2011 at 7:38 am
Wow! Sheep say ‘bitches’ in Ireland?! I’m going to add that to my list of reasons to move there one day.
March 11, 2011 at 2:35 am
I think she has it backwards. It’s being featured on Etsy, the lowest form of maybe-handmade-but-probably-not, that either (1) guarantees no one can find your shop or (2) it’s just one of thousands that sell the exact same stuff for a lot less. Reputations are not enhanced by being on Etsy.
March 11, 2011 at 3:15 am
It’s about time I posted something regrettable in my etsy shop…
1) I will get exposure and sales
2) I get to charge HK €1000 per image
3) I get to buy that dream home of mine
March 11, 2011 at 5:10 am
Obviously my standards haven’t been whimsicle enough. I’m thinking of selling the contents of my 10-year old’s pockets. What do you think?*
[IMG]http://i51.tinypic.com/2ahf5uw.jpg[/IMG]
*Please note that the actual items are for sale, and not my beautifully composed photo.
March 11, 2011 at 5:11 am
Winning at posting photos. Bollocks.
March 11, 2011 at 9:40 am
Here you go:
the codes are under the message box
March 11, 2011 at 7:26 pm
WINNING!
March 11, 2011 at 3:23 pm
I’d buy it before the feather, face and spoon any day! … Is that candy?
March 11, 2011 at 6:46 pm
Itemised list, copyrighted BY ME in my pet-free home:
1 x upcycled bicycle brake handle
2 x vintage lego bricks
1 x penny (EUR)
1 x sticker which reads ‘A Book in Every Stocking’
1 x punk steam barcode label
1 x pretty harmonica, taken from the sleeping hooves of Jebus’s favourite unicorn, €500,000 (yes, I know the price is high, but I honestly love it so much I don’t want to sell it!!!!!I’ve only listed it to indulge my vanity!!!!)
1 x pre-loved pretty plaster/band aid
1 x elasticated string (2in, maroon)
1 x handmade Christmas light bulb
1 x small handful of various sweet wrappers (so pretty!)
1 x tantrix puzzle piece
1 x snapped slingshot elastic band
1 x whimsicle large crumb from tortilla chip (chilli flavour)
1 x Japanese wish cat figure
2 x glass diamonds
1 x used matchstick (this is worrying)
1 x dirty wodge of white tack
1 x apple juice straw wrapper
1 x Incredible Hulk animation flipper book wotsit
March 11, 2011 at 3:22 am
Well done. Julie Frame is such a tool.
March 11, 2011 at 11:59 am
Mwah, Tanya! I’m not stupid. Really I’m not.
March 11, 2011 at 3:35 am
Ok, I solved this mystery. The original peck of the day got only 89 comments. The average regretsy post gets around 200 (I guess…) so she had to do a write-up in order to be lawfully double-featured, another regretsy bait…
March 11, 2011 at 3:40 am
This flounce of epic proportions shall be known as: FLOUNCEPOCALYPSE
March 11, 2011 at 4:26 am
Some day my dumb vintage shit will be featured on regretsy… and then I will mock up a creamy “namaste bitches” thumbnail for the listing. I plan to spend my earnings on more ironic bullshit and meth. It is good to have goals, I reckon…
March 11, 2011 at 4:49 am
THIS?!
RIDICULAWESOME!!
March 11, 2011 at 6:04 am
The best part is where she tries to “respectfully demand” $300 as a “licensing fee” to cover her “loss.”
That’s like a marginally hot guy coming up to me to demand that I pay him for the privilege of watching his mediocre ass walk by.
March 11, 2011 at 11:33 am
But watching dude deprive you so by walking backwards away from you and smacking his mediocre ass AND skull against a lamp post is almost worth paying for.
I still think I’ll grab the torrent instead.
March 11, 2011 at 6:15 am
I love these litigious artists and handcrafters. Do you think the hen consented to be photographed for commercial purposes? It didn’t look like it had full legal awareness…
If you make snarking a crime, only criminals will have snark. Just think about THAT.
March 11, 2011 at 6:27 am
Every time copyright infringement comes up here at Regretsy, I think of this guy, who trademarked the phrase “freedom of expression.” I think I might owe him a dollar now.
http://www.freedomofexpression.us/trademark.html
March 11, 2011 at 8:35 am
Given the context of the article I think you’re good. ( I read the whole thing)
March 17, 2011 at 12:26 am
one of my favorite creative Illegal Art endeavors! when this “trademark” expires, freedom of expression arse up for grabs!
check this link for the most of the most…
http://illegal-art.org/print/index.html
March 11, 2011 at 6:41 am
When I first opened my Etsy shop, I wanted to use some song lyrics in my listings. Someone cautioned me that I should probably check into the legalities before doing that. Turns out the record companies wanted thousands in roaylties just to have the lyrics in my listings because I would technically be making money off the lyrics.
So yeah, she could be in deep doo doo. (And no, I didn’t use the lyrics.)
March 11, 2011 at 6:46 am
LOVED looking thru her ETSY STORE … either it was stuff I’ve thrown away, picked up cheap at yard sales or seen for sale at craft shops.
Have even bought a (exact design yet bigger version) “Vintage Glass Dome with Wood Base” with the “made in China” sticker still on it at a rummage sale last summer for fiddy cents.
With great joy I found one of the few truly vintage items she offers – an egg basket, to be incorrectly identified as a garden basket. (And if the item is re-named we know where she found that info.)
“Old Red Hen” my ass.
No wonder why she doesn’t want to be featured on Regretsy; smart and talented people might see thru the fuckery.
March 11, 2011 at 7:24 am
Ooh – funny! I did have a couple of +1′s or so (this comment and a reply in next post – do did Dix), but someone thumb-downed those comments.
Did they strike home much?
March 11, 2011 at 9:28 am
Behold, yet another lurker who registered just for the sake of commenting.
The “Vintage Glass Dome with Wood Base” looks to me like a cheese case. There’s one very much like it sitting in my kitchen, which I got by trading some funnels at a kitchen swap. Another case of incorrect identification, perhaps? Or is it that important to keep your sewing supplies from going stale?
March 11, 2011 at 10:01 am
I really hate it when my sewing supplies go stale. Especially my vintage sewing supplies.
March 11, 2011 at 6:49 am
“Lovely, creamy, yummy blog” is my new favorite description for blogs belonging to irritatingly self-conscious craft mavens.
March 11, 2011 at 6:51 am
and I can just see the phrase being taken seriously by the “irritatingly self-conscious craft mavens” ;^D
March 11, 2011 at 7:00 am
I can actually take the sellers that just come out and say “Im really offended that you would make fun of me how dare you you meanie-face” more seriously…at least its more honest then this fake-legal bullshit this chick is trying to hide behind.
March 11, 2011 at 7:03 am
Cool it Julie! Being featured here is going to make you more cash than being featured anywhere else in the world.
March 11, 2011 at 7:21 pm
Exactly why do they get there panties in a bunch? Killer is helping them in all honesty, who else would love or ever notice barnwood but us
March 11, 2011 at 7:06 am
BRAVO!
March 11, 2011 at 7:07 am
Here is the form letter she used:
http://www.free-legal-document.com/copyright-cease-and-desist.html
March 11, 2011 at 7:21 am
Nice detective work!
March 11, 2011 at 7:30 am
wow … can’t even be original in her faux-legalese.
Addendum – and the wonderful idea someone had earlier in the above comments of selling the pictures she takes would be great. Though selling those prints thru Pottery Barn would be more effective/appropriate than thru Etsy.
With up-cycled barnwood frames of course.
March 11, 2011 at 8:34 am
“up-cycled” cracks me up. Barn wood, which once performed the noble duty of keeping bloodthirsty foxes out of the chicken shed or whatever the hell farmers put in barns in these scary modern times, now serves as a charmingly rustic display for thrift-store rejects from granny’s retirement home bedside cleanout. How is going from useful and appropriate to an utter fucking waste of space and money an upward move? Barn wood has lost its purpose. Barn wood is probably praying for a cleansing fire.
March 12, 2011 at 7:16 am
Isn’t it a ridiculous word? Should only be used with sarcasm.
March 11, 2011 at 8:25 am
that letter is for a “literary/artistic/musical work”. Can we get cum-and-gold-eye-shadow lady in here to determine (in 1,000 words or less) weather or not a photo of used stuff you are selling is a work of art?
Also I just want to say I sell on Etsy I would CREAM all over this blog if I was Regretsy-ed.
Unfortunately, my stuff isn’t useless enough for regretsy and it isn’t creamy/architectural enough for the front page of Etsy. I’m one of those un-extraordinary middle-grounders.
If I was Old Red Hen I would be sooo thankful that both Etsy And Regretsy featured my stuff.
what is she complaining about?
March 11, 2011 at 8:28 am
geez. I know the dif between weather and whether. I swear. I just get very in the moment when I post. They aren’t errors they are art.
March 11, 2011 at 8:36 am
Oh snap!
March 11, 2011 at 4:06 pm
Great catch there!
March 11, 2011 at 7:50 am
This is beyond smackdown…this is smackdown through next generation smackdown.
March 11, 2011 at 8:28 am
I’m holding out for Level 5 smackdown, where the seller ends up offering to pay for Regretsy’s web hosting forever.
March 11, 2011 at 8:06 am
I think Helen’s blog is whipcreamy!
March 11, 2011 at 8:19 am
HK,
Of course he is discriminating against you. You don’t have enough barnwood on your blog.
March 11, 2011 at 8:34 am
Maybe if we just blingee the shit out of her photos we won’t have to pay her.
March 11, 2011 at 8:42 am
These are fun.
I got a nice convo from diluted girl who told me I was infringing on her rights. She used the same phrase as me (and a million other people) on her items as I did on my items. Etsy pulled my item, I filed a counter claim and copyrighted my shit.
Good times.
March 11, 2011 at 8:50 am
Did you win? I gotta know how the story ends. :<
March 11, 2011 at 11:11 am
Yes. I was able to put my item back up. A short phrase can not be copyrighted. This taught me a lot about copyright law.
She was chasing down every etsy seller using the same phrase. We’re starting a club. We’re trademarking our club name.
March 11, 2011 at 12:59 pm
What was the phrase? Thats what I want to know.
March 12, 2011 at 7:42 am
I love you more than zombies love brains.
March 11, 2011 at 2:28 pm
Diluted or deluded?
March 12, 2011 at 7:43 am
hahahhahahahhahaha
oh….me.
March 13, 2011 at 12:13 am
See? Now that is how the last legal butthurt “Let is snow” seller should have reacted to the discovery of her “oops.” My hat’s off to you,Jea!
March 11, 2011 at 8:46 am
I love your brain
March 11, 2011 at 8:55 am
The “New Real Helen” has totally trumped the “Old Red Hen”
March 11, 2011 at 8:59 am
Loved your creamy response HK.
Say it with Barnwood!
March 11, 2011 at 9:03 am
Note that none of these is a place or a goal, its just whimsical bullshit! Fail at legal mumbo jumbo, fail at answering questions, and fail at poetry. Namaste bitches!
“Where would you like to be in ten years?
Climbing vines
Shady trees
Summer storms
Honey bees
Shooting stars
Family
And a brood of old red hens.”
March 11, 2011 at 10:40 am
*whimsicle
March 11, 2011 at 10:40 am
(sorry, I couldn’t help m’self.)
March 11, 2011 at 7:14 pm
uh oh! we have been hit by the Spelling Nazi! Watch out or the Rollychair Warrior will get yoooouuu next!
March 11, 2011 at 9:06 am
I love the fact that she’s not even intelligent enough to figure out who the author of the post was – and attributes it to “Helen Killer.”
Her completely ignorant legalese is entertaining. It always amuses me when people try so hard to make their letters sound all official.
March 11, 2011 at 9:26 am
I like how she thinks she knows more about copyright protection and fair use than someone who has worked for Disney. I can only imagine the size of the contract one has to sign before uttering a single cartoon character’s word!
March 11, 2011 at 9:44 am
March 11, 2011 at 10:10 am
Why not send her an invoice for the advertising and product spotlight on Regretsy?
March 11, 2011 at 10:17 am
Once again, for the kids in back:
Copyright law protects your work from being REPRODUCED or RESOLD. It also protects your work from being used by someone WHO CLAIMS IT AS THEIR OWN. That’s why US Copyright Law has a magical clause called Fair Use: “Fair use is a judicial doctrine that refers to a use of copyrighted material that does not infringe or violate the exclusive rights of the copyright holder. Examples of fair use involve the reproduction of works for the purpose of “criticism, comment, news reporting,…scholarship, or research” (17 U.S.C.A. § 107)”
In addition, copyright law is meant to protect artistic and journalistic works. Art photos, professional photos, or even amateur photos of significant event may be copy-written. A photograph of an item for RESALE is NOT covered by copyright law. If YOU the seller do not hold a patent on the item, you cannot copyright its image:
March 11, 2011 at 10:22 am
1. The item being photographed most likely is a trademarked product. The image of the trademarked product belongs to the owner of the trademark, and as such is not copyrightable. Utilitarian objects like a SPOON generally cannot be copyrighted, nor can purely textual material on a label. Ets-Hokin v. Skyy Spirits, Inc., 225 F.3d 1068 (9th Cir. 2000)
3. Owners of trademarks rarely attempt to copyright images of their product. An example is the Coca-Cola bottle (which is distinctive and easily recognizable). A picture of a Coca-Cola bottle, while it may have a trademarked image on it, is not artistic. Taking a picture of an old bottle for purposes of resale would likely be considered fair use under copyright law. (Cf. Ty, Inc. v. Publications Int’l Ltd, 292 F.3d 512 (7th Cir. 2002))
March 11, 2011 at 10:37 am
The hilarious thing is that these types of judgements were made to protect resellers – people selling shit on eBay. If I want to sell my old Star Wars toys, LucasFilm Ltd can’t sue me for copyright or trademark violation for taking a picture of those toys to post on the auction. On the flip side, I can’t claim a copyright on that photograph. I have no control over other people on the internet linking to my photo and saying, “I can’t believe that bitch wants $50 for a Chewbacca with no arms!”
March 11, 2011 at 10:44 am
This is especially hilarious to me because I actually chewed the arms off my Luke Skywalker and then set his head on fire when I was 7.
Today I could have sold that masticated and mutilated thing as art on Etsy.
March 11, 2011 at 10:52 am
“This unique art doll, realized by a precocious &-y-old phenom, represents the repressed self-hatred encouraged in today’s post-feminist youth by the fictionalization and romanticizing of the dysfunctional father-son relationship”
March 11, 2011 at 3:08 pm
Those guys are irresistibly chewable. I chewed all the fingers off my little brother’s Star Wars boydollies. I liked the way they popped in my mouth. That’s right. Popped.
March 11, 2011 at 5:31 pm
My husband and his brother filmed little homemade “Star Wars” movies with their action figures. Apparently, the lack of stunt doubles led to a lot of mutilation and destruction of the cast. A box of them turned up when his dad was clearing out the house, missing heads and limbs.
If I was a cruel woman, I would have mentioned this to him when he was blinking back tears during the last “Toy Story” movie.
March 11, 2011 at 10:55 am
This is some impressive butthurt. She got all the words spelled correctly and everything. Her righteous indignation combined with her abnormal love of chickens leads me to believe she resides in Portland. I don’t know if there are any REAL practicing attorneys up there, but I’ll bet they’ve all left their practices to start letterpress printing co-ops. And raise chickens.
March 11, 2011 at 11:45 am
Helen, this is your official notice. The card from your lawyers contains a picture of legal scales used by me in copyrighted works. As such, only I have the right to use clipart. Pay me $1,000 or be hit with a threatening letter.
– from a Julie who has nothing to do with little red hens
March 11, 2011 at 12:16 pm
Apparently she’s represented by the law firm of Cryabeetus & Flouncery, Esquires.
March 11, 2011 at 12:34 pm
I think you should file such posts in an ‘Uh-oh, Spaghetti-os!’ section…
March 11, 2011 at 12:49 pm
Well I’m a Canadian and not as familiar with your laws but my understanding is the right to parody in art is well entrenched in the US constitution, more so even than in ours. Now excuse me while I iron my flouncy apron and freshen up before the men folk get home.
I feel pretty… oh so pretty…
March 13, 2011 at 7:31 pm
Nearly 3 decades worth of Saturday Night Live writers and cast are very happy to agree with your creamy legal acumen!
March 11, 2011 at 1:00 pm
This whole thing makes me feel sorry for barn wood. Barn wood never meant to hurt anyone – it was just cooling out on the barn. It’s not barn wood’s fault it’s been overexposed.
March 11, 2011 at 1:00 pm
Pshaw, it’s not even a real Cease and Desist letter.
A REAL Cease and desist Letter comes on a lawyer’s letterhead and has a laywer suckered into signing it. In which case, the lawyer also suckered the fool who sent it, because they probably charged them an arm and a mustache for it.
This one was obviously created by a wannabe internetz lawyer on the verge of a serious bout of flounce, with a side of drama.
March 13, 2011 at 7:40 pm
Try to see the fuckery from her flouncing butthole.
HK and we, the collective are making wee wee on her grand money making scheme – selling worthless crap to stupid people by arranging it attractively on barn wood and describing the result in some whimsicle way attractive to suckers.
She might have to get a real job if this bogus one craps out.
March 11, 2011 at 2:24 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
March 11, 2011 at 3:00 pm
oh man. this is internet GOLD.
March 11, 2011 at 4:12 pm
PLEASE keep us updated on any future correspondence between the 2 of you.
March 11, 2011 at 6:11 pm
You are so badass.
March 11, 2011 at 7:04 pm
The fact that you were able to find all that to back your talented awesomely evil ass up is AMAZING, how do you do that!? I believe you have that #Tigerblood! hello, DUH #WINNING!!!! julie from the old barn is sizzle…losing….BYE!
YOu are AweSome GurL!
March 11, 2011 at 8:36 pm
No…wait…she IS the Etsy chicken? And she’s admitting this, in public? In other words, you’re exactly right about how they choose their picks???? Methinks the lady should rethink her strategy.
March 11, 2011 at 9:24 pm
I hadn’t even noticed that the Spoon, Face and Feather were by her, and later (or was it earlier?) I saw her featured on Etsy’s Spotlight and thought “She sounds cool, looks like a nice shop, lots of pretty things” and her shop name stuck in my mind then. NOW of course, I realize she’s the Spoon, Face Feather seller, which I hadn’t noticed before, and much worse, I realize she’s mean. She just undid the niceness all by herself. That’s kind of sad.
March 12, 2011 at 7:17 am
I like how I’m the only one with the balls to post a reply on the actual Etsy article this refers to.
http://www.etsy.com/storque/spotlight/featured-seller-theoldredhen-12356/
March 12, 2011 at 11:59 am
It took a lot of digging to find the one comment that wasn’t a gushing compliment. Btw I noticed the Instant Collection pic didn’t make the cut for the article.
March 12, 2011 at 7:13 pm
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March 13, 2011 at 7:29 pm
Oh, now now summerset-check the lovely, creamy blog for my pretty little comment.
March 12, 2011 at 11:08 am
for all she knows, you posted the image of her piece by taking a picture of your computer screen with her photo on it and fixing it up in photoshop. which makes it your own handmade artwork and therefore you own all the rights and you oughta countersue her for harrassment
March 14, 2011 at 10:01 am
To those of you commenting on how nice her photography is, the composition is passable – but what the heck is up with the exposure? I like authentically sun bleached barnwood in my photos please… She’s even all blue-y bleached out in her featured seller photo. Yeesh, try another filter, willya?
March 15, 2011 at 1:14 am
Ah! gotta love those letters. I own a popular Parenting site (with forums) and I’ve been threatened with many a’ cease and desist letters Some of the butt-hurt members who were “bullied” on the boards for being unfit parents, got angry when we called them out on their unfit parenting skills. lol Their letters never looked that well together though. I mean that one actually looks legit. Even though she only googled to get all those big words and figures. lol
March 16, 2011 at 4:57 am
Julie Frame ? As in “out of” ?
March 17, 2011 at 12:01 am
Mother of all Chickens, a few minutes off to recoup (oops…), and a Big Red Hen comes in and starts pecking everybody to DEATH?
Over an itinerant feather, a lost fork and random watch face? That’s soooo Fowl!!!
What this Seller sells are pretty pictures. Any Bird-brain who pays for that gets to keep the pretty “props”!