Things That Are Not Steampunk #18
Professor Pennywhistle reached into his fantastic adjustable hip satchel, producing a few farthings and a folded map of Main Street.
“Now then,” he began, “who wants a churro?”
85 comments on Things That Are Not Steampunk #18
Leave a Reply
You must be logged in to post a comment.
February 24, 2011 at 9:39 am
This is what H.G. Wells carried his manuscripts in so they wouldn’t get wet on the big drop on Splash Mountain.
February 24, 2011 at 9:42 am
Leather = steampunk?
February 24, 2011 at 9:42 am
Why does black automatically equal gothic?!
Although it does look as though the seller has just stuck in a pin in a chart marked ‘adjectives’.
February 24, 2011 at 9:43 am
The only thing it will look truelly awesome with is an XXXL Mickey U sweatshirt.
February 24, 2011 at 9:43 am
Complete with the sweat from the last hippie that wore this unfortunate item. This reminds me of something my uncles and step dad wore to the swap meet. Drug deals? Yes. This is just gross and uhmmm, not ‘steampunk’. Please!
February 24, 2011 at 9:44 am
Nothing says gothic like pulling an asthma inhaler out of a fanny pack.
February 24, 2011 at 9:44 am
Buy handmade! Not…
About the only good thing I can say about this post is the price. That’s actually reasonable. At least the seller isn’t charging extra for the adjectives.
February 24, 2011 at 9:45 am
Steampunk…I do not think it means what you think it means…
February 24, 2011 at 9:45 am
Bitch, please. Something commonly spotted on older tourists in Times Square can NOT be described as “radical”.
February 24, 2011 at 9:45 am
YOU KEEP USING THAT WORD
February 24, 2011 at 9:47 am
I hope this actually is “vintage,” as it would be more upsetting if this were a NEW fanny pack.
February 24, 2011 at 9:49 am
Neither steam, nor punk, nor goth.
Come on now. We all know if it was REALLY steampunk it would have watch parts hot glue-gunned to it. And maybe an enamel ice cream cone or two.
February 24, 2011 at 9:51 am
This seller is on to something.
If your dress has a huge bustle, you’re going to need a place for your opera glasses when you’re at NASCAR.
February 24, 2011 at 9:52 am
When I wear my top hat and bustle, before I even grab my parasol I strap on my Incredibly Amazing Globetrotting Fannypack. It’s where I keep the spare keys to my dirigible.
February 24, 2011 at 9:54 am
Other possible categories for this post:
Not Remotely Radical
Not Remotely Gothic
Not Remotely Vintage
Not Remotely Indie
Zippers
February 24, 2011 at 9:56 am
Man, I had no idea steampunk fashion could be inspired by stupid shit from 1993.
February 24, 2011 at 9:56 am
Don’t want to think too hard about a steam-powered fanny pack.
February 24, 2011 at 9:58 am
Maybe it’s steampunk cuz it still contains an E Ticket.
February 24, 2011 at 10:05 am
Labeled “indie”, tagged “industrial”. Hmm…
February 24, 2011 at 10:07 am
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
February 24, 2011 at 10:09 am
In the UK, these were called “Bum Bags”.
That comment is punk steampunk unique and new vintage.
February 24, 2011 at 10:10 am
Miss Landsedowne searched her truly awesome bustle-style valise for her fan and her reserve flask of PBR.
February 24, 2011 at 10:12 am
Truelly? My dad is steampunk? Awesome!
February 24, 2011 at 10:15 am
Does this mean cotton-blend stirrup pants and hot-pink Tweety Bird t-shirts are also steampunk?
February 24, 2011 at 10:16 am
Uh, HELLO. This is “Steam Punk” because the seller used hizzer STEAM POWERED TIME MACHINE to travel into the future where this is now vintage (and not simply out-of-date, used crap).
February 24, 2011 at 10:21 am
I would never time travel without my steampunk fanny-pack. You never know when you’ll need band-aids and sunscreen in the post-apocalyptic future!
February 24, 2011 at 10:23 am
You used to be able to get this exact thing on the streets of NYC for about $5.
February 24, 2011 at 10:24 am
That will be totally awesome with my gothic parachute pants…. totallly!
February 24, 2011 at 10:26 am
Waist bag?
I think they mean “waste” bag. As in, this bag should go in the waste.
February 24, 2011 at 10:27 am
This is great. I’m going to wear it with my steampunk Zubaz.
February 24, 2011 at 10:30 am
Everything to this seller is “radical.”
For the radical mountain man…”radical mens rustic camping nature vintage sweater vest with reindeers size extra extra large”
For the radical vandal…”radical frank sinatra record bowl”
For the radical golfer…”radical vintage hand made green indie knit vest”
For the radical cold person…”radical vintage retro indie candy apple red and black diamonds knit scarf”
For the radical woman at a ski resort…”radical vintage columbia 1980 zipper front fleece ski jacket womans”
For the radical Indian tourist…”radical vintage southwestern indian blanket black leather billfold wallet deadstock unisex”
For the radical urban cowboy…RADICAL indie steam punk rockabilly navy vintage mens studded western button up shirt”
For the radical old fart…”radical indie vintage mens blue grey windbreaker jacket sweater like sweatshirt size medium”
I never knew radical people came from so many walks in life.
February 24, 2011 at 10:33 am
I heard the Weather Underground used to carry bomb supplies in their chic fanny packs. Also? How do you think the Black Panthers got their name?
February 24, 2011 at 10:37 am
Holy shit! So that’s the guy who stole my fanny pack in the bathroom at Studio 54!
February 24, 2011 at 10:38 am
The only way this could possibly be steampunk is if it’s worn right above your ass underneath your skirt, and you called it a “bustle”
February 24, 2011 at 10:39 am
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
February 24, 2011 at 10:42 am
@35
Commenting on the featured stuff = fine – that’s what we’re here for.
Commenting on other people’s comments =/= cool.
February 24, 2011 at 11:00 am
The caption brought me right back to 1985, when I was eight years old in the line for Space Mountain at Disneyland and my uncle whipped out that very fanny pack and offered us all churros. Mmm, churros! Thanks for the memories.
February 24, 2011 at 11:08 am
Maybe we’re not giving this seller enough credit. “Truelly” this fanny pack is “new steampunk”… like yesterday’s seller’s sunglasses were “new vintage”
February 24, 2011 at 11:24 am
If you go shirtless, and paint a face on your tummy, this fanny pack can be your goatee. It will start a whole new hipster facial hair trend – sick of mustaches? Get a goatee.
Now run along and go make this happen, mommy still isn’t drunk enough to deal with you yet.
February 24, 2011 at 11:34 am
The seller is really missing an opportunity to label this a “steam punk gothic leather merkin.” After all, the difference between fanny pack and merkin is really just a matter of positioning.
February 24, 2011 at 11:41 am
I know I shouldn’t feed the trolls, but:
Thank god 6eisha showed up with her insightful, witty comments!
February 24, 2011 at 11:42 am
@freckleyredhead-I second that!
February 24, 2011 at 11:45 am
Geez, should’ve at *least* super glued some clock parts and octopusses.
February 24, 2011 at 11:58 am
This fanny pack may be evil, but not so much as this “vintage sad clown halloween mask home decor” also sold in the seller’s store. I think these two items ought to be worn together for extra radical indie vintage steampunk sex appeal. http://www.etsy.com/listing/56698145/sale-vintage-sad-clown-halloween-mask
February 24, 2011 at 12:04 pm
This is awesome! This “steampunk” fanny pack would be the perfect accessory to go with those “new vintage” glasses that other person was selling
February 24, 2011 at 12:09 pm
I guess this means that even steampunk kids can have fashion-impaired parents, too.
February 24, 2011 at 12:13 pm
Shouldn’t that have a vulva and some watch parts on it?
February 24, 2011 at 12:17 pm
HK, I took a few liberties:
Henry Warnimont reached into his fantastic adjustable hip satchel, producing a few haypennies and a folded map of Main Street.
“Now then,” he began, “what do I need to do to adopt this spunky little girl and her adorbale dog?”
Waalaa–Steampunky Brewster
February 24, 2011 at 12:18 pm
*adorable
February 24, 2011 at 12:19 pm
#45 Madam Morgana, shouldn’t everything have a vulva and some watch parts on it?
February 24, 2011 at 12:20 pm
Whenever there’s one of these “steampunk” items on this site, it makes me think of this Natalie Dee web comic:
http://www.nataliedee.com/032309/steampunk.jpg
And then I giggle.
February 24, 2011 at 12:22 pm
I had a fanny pack in the 90s. It was made of cat-print tapestry fabric. Nobody called me hip, indie, punk, gothic or steampunk though. In fact they called me a dork and punched me repeatedly. Guess I was doing it wrong.
February 24, 2011 at 12:23 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
February 24, 2011 at 12:27 pm
My father, J. Quentin Kartouffle, has that same fanny pack in taupe and is has been in constant use for over a decade.
February 24, 2011 at 12:43 pm
#38 regretsyaddict
Dammit I just realized you beat me to that joke!
You win this round my friend
February 24, 2011 at 12:43 pm
6eisha, I’ll make a deal with you. As soon as you say something interesting or clever that contributes to the conversation in any way, you can then have an opinion on other people’s comments. OK?
February 24, 2011 at 12:45 pm
It all makes sense now, she lives in an alternate universe. How else would a vest from that old SNL Mom Jeans skit qualify as "radical men’s vintage"?
February 24, 2011 at 12:50 pm
Wow, this pack looks exactly like the one I wear as a poop bag when I walk my dogs. Didn’t know I was so hip…
February 24, 2011 at 12:51 pm
At least it is …sweet. I was sold with radical, spacious and punk as the adjectives of the day. But to end on …sweet. I say, SOLD! But I agree it needs a rainbow vulva pin of some sort to truly make it mine.
Or I could pin the vulva pin to my black socks worn with my favorite sandals. It’s a tough fashion call.
February 24, 2011 at 1:02 pm
update: i was just at my local goodwill, which recently received a gargantuan donation of fannypacks. serendipity!
http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=1886614205319&set=a.1587010155405.2076070.1240348275&theater
February 24, 2011 at 1:34 pm
Am I the only one who hates the phrase “great vintage condition” and “excellent vintage condition” and the like? IT’S VINTAGE. WE GET IT.
February 24, 2011 at 1:38 pm
I’m betting the seller just took a dictionnary and just popped random keywords for the etsy browser.
February 24, 2011 at 1:51 pm
r2mccord: (dude, awesome last name) now see, that’s what I get for not looking at the seller’s page. I read it as “radical vintage,” as in not just vintage, but RADICAL vintage. Really, extremely, goes-to-eleven vintage. “Have you come to admire my collection of antiquities? This waist-satchel was found in the ruins of Troy!”
February 24, 2011 at 1:52 pm
Vintage means nothing. Nothing anymore.
February 24, 2011 at 1:53 pm
I am starting to wonder, as of this listing, if they’re starting to do this just to get our goats(e).
February 24, 2011 at 2:15 pm
Here in the UK, not only do we call them bum bags but ‘fanny’ can mean vagina. I have always been amused when I hear about ‘fanny packs’ because I imagine people going round with little bags to keep their lady bits in.
February 24, 2011 at 2:29 pm
ooooh, love it!!! Lady bits! Gonna steal that!
February 24, 2011 at 2:31 pm
But, were i to have a bag to keep my “lady bits” in, it would be prettier & more unique…..considering what it would hold!
February 24, 2011 at 2:41 pm
@ #66 pentoon — my point exactly. See #40.
February 24, 2011 at 2:46 pm
@ #50 Princess Buzzkill Crying Glitter Eagle:
Yes. Everything should. Even your vulva should have a vulva and watch parts on it.
Please visit my Etsy store, Radical Vintage Steampunk Gothic Genital Gewellery, to see my new range of vulva octopus watch part clit rings. Or friend us on Facebook.
February 24, 2011 at 3:21 pm
My 60-year-old father wears a fanny pack like that constantly; evidently he’s more hip than I thought. I wonder if his trademark socks and sandals are steampunk too.
February 24, 2011 at 3:35 pm
I’d be steamed too if someone punked me with this thing.
February 24, 2011 at 3:39 pm
“Steampunk” – NO.
“Steaming Pile” – YES
February 24, 2011 at 4:02 pm
oh so there is a difference between the great vintage grade and poor vintage?
February 24, 2011 at 5:53 pm
#74-Only if your discussing fine wines.
February 24, 2011 at 6:32 pm
#75 tell that to the seller
February 24, 2011 at 7:05 pm
These punks really get me steamed.
February 24, 2011 at 7:05 pm
You mean for $12, I can finally complete my steampunk garage sale patron outfit?
February 24, 2011 at 7:10 pm
#78 well not complete but close; goggles, pocket watch and steam powered flying machine sold separately…
February 24, 2011 at 7:29 pm
@61 no_cookies4you
IT’S USED! WE GET IT!
*fixed that for you.
February 24, 2011 at 8:41 pm
you don’t wear this shit facing front….you wear this shit to the side that’s steampunk
February 24, 2011 at 11:02 pm
I’m laughing at the Gothic tag. Yeah, you can always tell a Goth by their black fanny pack.
February 24, 2011 at 11:55 pm
#34 Princess Buzzkill Crying Glitter Eagle : I was thinking one might be able to get a way with tucking in a bustle, but then I realized it would be detremental to anything in said steampunk fanny pack. I would not want to have to pull shards of my opera glasses and my absinthe spoon out of my derierre…
February 25, 2011 at 4:08 am
Nobody commented on that creepy clown mask? Perfect match for the fanny pack. And just as steampunk.
Now here’s some steampunk for you. It’s a café in Poland. Looks like it was dsigned by Jules Verne.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r0Z_sTjKaUM&feature=player_embedded#at=18
February 25, 2011 at 10:44 am
There is nothing “sweet” about a fanny pack. And there never was.