Regretsy’s Crafter School Special
Well this is exciting!
For reasons unclear to me, savings.com has asked me to do a weekly craft tutorial.
My first piece went up a few minutes ago, and I think it’s a good one. I can’t think of any craft more useful for people like us, meaning people who drink a lot.
Please take a moment to read it and leave a comment. You probably have to register over there to comment, but it will be worth it, because I’m giving away three fucktastic prizes that will change your life for a good ten minutes.
February 15, 2011 at 10:27 am
HK are a genius. An evil craftastic genius!
February 15, 2011 at 10:29 am
Wooo Hooooo..we get to leave comments on both sites…Reminds me of the song “Alice’s Restaurant”
If one person leaves a comment, they’ll think they’re a moron and leave them alone.
If two people leave comments, holding hands, they’ll think they both perverts and leave them both alone….
But if 100 people leave comments, they’ll think it’s a movement…and that’s what it is, my friends, the Regretsy Whimsicle Fuckery Movement!!!
February 15, 2011 at 10:32 am
I am much more in favor of Whimsicle Fuckery than Heinous Fuckery. And that Snooki Book? Heinous Fuckery all the way, baby.
February 15, 2011 at 11:00 am
OK but the last pic there isn’t completely authentic. There’s still booze left in that bottle.
February 15, 2011 at 11:01 am
Man, I know what I’m doing for Halloween now.
February 15, 2011 at 11:10 am
I’ve never seen an autobiographical pamphlet before. Her life must be oozing with amazing stories – literally!
February 15, 2011 at 11:12 am
@Mag – You are genius! @DucksNew – There is also no accompanying vomit puddle; strive for authenticity, HK. Just sayin…
February 15, 2011 at 11:24 am
No need for actual vomit. That cat puke necklace would work just fine!
February 15, 2011 at 11:34 am
You left the book intact. aww. And here I was hoping this would involve a flamethrower somehow…
February 15, 2011 at 11:38 am
@#2, drat, now I want a T-shirt that says “Regretsy Whimsicle Fuckery Movement” on it. Maybe it could be decorated with a jug labeled “Hillbilly Bajingo Cleaner.”
February 15, 2011 at 11:39 am
I would have gone with “cover the lower half of your face with cheeto dust. Last pict-priceless!
February 15, 2011 at 11:40 am
Mac seems to be looking at you on the floor and thinking, “We really have A Situation here”
February 15, 2011 at 11:44 am
Would love to see fellow Oompa Loompa John Boehner wearing that mask, wouldn’t be the first (or last) time Snooki had a weepy orange Boehner shoved in her face.
February 15, 2011 at 12:16 pm
I can’t believe I made TWO crayon jokes in two days!
February 15, 2011 at 12:42 pm
I’m only registering over there if I can win the little dog.
And by ‘dog’ I mean the terrier/bulldog animal in the bottom photo, not the orange thing with the big hair on the book cover.
February 15, 2011 at 12:42 pm
I was all excited to make my Snookie mask, but then it involved math and measuring. Not to mention the use of big girl scissors.
February 15, 2011 at 12:56 pm
I love you Helen. This mask has more kickass fuckery than any $45 cat puke necklace on Etsy.
February 15, 2011 at 1:02 pm
great job! I love the last picture with the pickles. Brilliant!
February 15, 2011 at 1:57 pm
My April induced engorgement rapidly shank upon her donning the Snooki device. I’d call that a success.
February 15, 2011 at 2:29 pm
I would wear mine in a theater during a 3D movie, so everyone else in their 3D glasses might be fooled into thinking that chick had depth.
February 15, 2011 at 2:40 pm
My dearest April, I have made you an offer over there that you simply cannot refuse. I’ll even make it sweeter. If the procedure is successful, the photo will be enshrined forever in the baby book, which means you’d be responsible for embarrassing the kid for the rest of his/her life.
February 15, 2011 at 3:00 pm
Buhfuckingrilliant!
February 15, 2011 at 3:30 pm
Does she look so greasy on purpose? I just can’t believe someone can look so “I’m a grilled chicken” on a cover of his own book in this age of photoshop and mattifying powders.
February 15, 2011 at 3:42 pm
How about the ‘bearded lady’ position for that mask?
You know you want to.
February 15, 2011 at 3:46 pm
I love you so hard HK!
I’m thinking there could be a market for bbq sauce self tanner…….
February 15, 2011 at 5:19 pm
Best. Craft blog. Ever.
Your dog is the cutest thing, and you are wearing that awesome craftan.
February 15, 2011 at 6:21 pm
Whimsical fuckery at it’s finest!
February 15, 2011 at 6:41 pm
You were making the duck face when you took that picture of you measuring your head, didn’t you? I can tell by your eyes.
February 16, 2011 at 10:23 am
I’m going to ask my daughter if she wants to be something really really scary for Halloween and show her this mask tee hee hee she will freak!
February 16, 2011 at 12:29 pm
Oh my god, this totally made my shittastic day bearable. I went from weeping my ass off to cracking the first smile I’ve probably had in a week. Thanks.
February 16, 2011 at 1:17 pm
Ahhhh… I dunno. RU up to your epic trickery here, HK?
I’m getting a sensational vibe of Just Been “Snookered”…
February 16, 2011 at 6:51 pm
At first I thought this was a book about poodle-ass measurement. Then I saw two stupid eyes under the measuring tape. Well, that’ll teach me not to get excited.
February 16, 2011 at 8:07 pm
Okay, apparently you can’t say “gynecologist” or “merkin” in your comments on savings.com but you can say “bajingo”. How are you supposed to comment on a Snooki mask and NOT mention wearing it over your hoo-hoo (to your doctor’s appt)?
And you just KNOW someone is going to start selling Bajingo Bumpits on Etsy now.
Oh for fuck’s sake. Well, give them a break, they’re just trying to to figure things out. They got slammed with traffic yesterday and I don’t think they were prepared for any of this. – HK
February 16, 2011 at 8:10 pm
I hope people don’t have to resort to buying the book in order to photocopy the cover.
February 17, 2011 at 12:46 pm
I hope the Situation gets his book published then we can paint this whimsical fuckery project complete!