- Submitted by Raven
I dont want to wear a fur rug on my chest.
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I’ve heard of coon-ass women before…
this made me laugh until I cried.
Thank God for that back lining! It makes this >0 fun!
What will complete my gorgeous ensemble? AHA! A crushed animal head mounted on a lace doily. How whimsicle!
How can I check out the back lining if you don’t post a picture? Although, I don’t know if anything can be more “fun” than the front. Turn heads indeed!
‘Recycled raccoon skin?’ What the hell does that mean? ‘It used to be a raccoon’s skin, but we killed it and now we’re reusing the skin?”
When you’re headless but gotta be “♪♫ Daveeeeeeee, Davey Crocket…”
Two words: chest merkin.
I can see hanging this out by my trash cans as a warning to all the neighborhood scavengers.
“For added fun, check out the back lining.”
Is that an euphemism? Am I going to regret having asked?
It looks like a chest merkin that may bite if provoked…
Maybe it’s a friend for the beaver?
maybe it’s me…but I’m scared that the manniquin has a flower for a head!
Obviously for those into roadkill chic.
I wonder if she had an opossum head hat to compliment it.
“Trespassers will be fabulized.”
Well…could be worse, they could have used a beaver head. Imagine how many heads would turn if you said, “Hey, check out my beaver!”
Maybe the fun back is a pocket to keep all your rabies shots.
“Turn heads” I guess that’s one way of phrasing “everyone you pass will do a double take before casually crossing the street and pretending you don’t exist”
Something tells me this would be more fun as a belt.
And to think, a rabid creature had to die for this abomination to be created… Well, it had to die, then be “recycled”…
If this really were an Ewok face, I’d actually wear it.
I think this would be more appropriate as a sporran.
My sister has a mink scarf and it’s nowhere near as scary-looking as that thing.
It’s attractive and so practical. Just think, the next time you’re eating whole raccoon heads and you drop a bit on your necklace, no one will notice!
I wonder if it’s also available in fox or wombat.
I don’t know why, but this just isn’t merkin for me.
For those for whom a ‘hottie’ t-shirt simply isn’t trashy enough.
She bought that at an Endor Walmart. Damn galactic resellers!
SCREENPLAY: STAR WARS, EPISODE VXIILI, “Things Fall Apart”
HAN: Happy anniversary, sweetheart! Something to remember our first hook-up by.
LEIA: Oh, you shouldn’t…wait, what is this?
[Cut to shot of divorce papers]
A wonderful conversation piece!
The first thing I noticed about the picture was the bunch of fake flowers shoved down the mannequin’s neck.
I think I should be worried.
This upcycling bullshit has got to stop! Leave roadkill alone!
That’s no necklace; it’s a bib.
It’s fur special occasions.
You should see the squirrel drink coaster earrings.
The leopard eye buttons, gold tone chain, and $125 price tag really class this shit up. Emphasis on the word “shit.”
WTH? I have nothing witty to say to this. It’s just downright fugly.
Wondering if this would be something the furries would wear at a convention or the protesters flaunting at them in front of the convention.
The button eyes…
The smashed sideways nose…
Forgive me, I’m having a Blue Velvet moment.
“What are you doing in my closet, Jeffrey Beaumont?”
Just looking for some accessories to go with this raccoon head necklace, Dorothy.
Could you make me a movie showing the epic battle between that necklace and this one?
You can surprise me with who wins.
(I didn’t think I’d miss Alchemy as much as you guys until now.)
Imagine if you added straps on the lower sides…..It could be a bikini top. Then, imagine the bikini bottom you could design and (and execute) to go with it.
For dignity’s sake, couldn’t they have left the racoon it’s own eyes? Or fake ones? Leopard buttons just make it look really creepy.
Yeah, I’m wondering why the “artist” didn’t just go whole raccoon and make it into a bathing suit…a little tail on your tail, perhaps??
This looks like something my hillbilly Grandma would wear….to church.
Dear God, she killed Wicket.
I don’t know about heads, but it certainly turned my stomach.
I don’t think so. I was traumatized enough by Where the Red Fern Grows.
…and here’s the rest of it: http://www.etsy.com/listing/67119763/genuine-raccoon-skull
The seller must work at the Roadkill Cafe. “Try some Centerline Bovine and some Chunk of skunk/Rack of raccoon all covered in junk/oodles of poodles and some smear of deer/But it’s the Awesome Possum keeps you comin’ back here!”
I’m so glad you posted this, I have a mess of ‘coon heads and now I know what to do with ‘em.
I would be more impressed if she had used the raccoon head for the mannequin.
It occurs to me that if Klinger had had Etsy in Korea, he would have got his Section 8.
It’s dressed as Judge Judy.
@#52, I dunno…maybe my memory of M*A*S*H is a bit hazy, but I remember Klinger having more class than that. Plenty of flair, mind you, and he wouldn’t shy away from wearing some wild stuff (even a Carmen Miranda get-up, IIRC), but I think even *he’d* find this a little too tacky. [Klinger voice]“Besides, what would I wear it with? It clashes with my fox stole and chinchilla muff![/Klinger voice].
Would it sweeten the pot, if you were to find out that this beautiful necklace also came with a matching hat and finely engraved musket?
well at least now we know what happened to the raccoon that ate all of John Candy’s hot dogs in “The Great Outdoors”
Okay, so I know that merkins were used to help girls in the world’s oldest profession hide the ravages of STIs.
What the blistering fuck has to be so wrong with your anatomy so as to require a be-doilied tittywig?
I clicked on the skull link and read the shipping “with another item” as “with an aneurysm”
Could be especially appropriate as a “don’t get your nose out of joint” peace offering.
Okay, this is obviously genetic engineering gone wrong.
“Wow, we made the first raccoon human!”
“Dude, he looks like Bob in Accounting.”
“You’re right…well, what should we do about it?”
“Make a necklace with the head and shove flowers down his neck.”
Also, “leopard eyes”? Is that what this thing died from?
Finally! Something chic for people who consider grocery shopping to be driving down the highway in search of roadkill!
If only these were safety pin earrings.
Coming soon to an Anthropologie near you.
A “chest merkin” is clearly a cherkin.
…and that’s why you don’t feed it after midnight.
Abso-fucking-lutely hideous. Wearing dead things isn’t fun if they still look dead. This chick is messed up.
Put your head on my shoulder
Root through my garbage, baby
Eat all bird my bird seed and
Tell me that you don’t have rabies
On a side note, how come with E-Commerce, E-Mail, E-News, E-Vite all out there no one has opened a high-tech Chinese restaurant called E-Wok?
What Laura Ingalls wore when she married Leatherface?
A doily on a chain? I mean i love wearing animal parts, i have a skinned squirrel face i made into a belt buckle, but I can’t think of one possible place a doily would make someone MORE attractive, unless like, someone were to wear it over their face, like that giant-nosed beast that plays the main character of sex in the city
At least that necklace has a chain.
This would be so cool if it weren’t for the leopard eyes. That’s just over-embellishing. Otherwise, she had me at “raccoon fur.”
cuddles? Is that you?
It will put hair on your chest!
I would have bought it if it was a purse.
The only positive thing I can think of is at least she didn’t call it steampunk.
what did poor Rockey raccoon do to deserve this??
Just a heads up everyone. California is taking bids for the next California beaver trapper
http://www.dailybreeze.com/latestnews/ci_17349472. No reason to use “recycled raccoon” when some crafty Etsyian crafter could win the contract and have a fresh supply of beaver.
Well, now I know what happened to that raccoon who used to get into our garbage…
RIP, Fluffy. Yes, you were annoying, but you still deserved better than this.
It looks like a fuzzy Cami Secret to me:
I prefer this version of the commercial:
I saw chest merkin and my mind immediately went to cherkin. I think it could be a new category on Etsy.
That’s not a necklace; that’s a breastplate.
#42 tejasmom: Really? The leopard button eyes are what make this creepy? I was way past creeped out before I realized they were buttons.
Meeko had a hard time finding parts in Hollywood after Pocohantas. Gambling was his main vice and eventually the mafia guys he borrowed money from came to collect. That kid had a lot going for him. This is a sad day for actors everywhere.
For some reason, the fact it’s a necklace bothers me more than the actual raccoon. Though they are both creepy, I for some reason keep seeing it as an apron instead of a necklace, or the piece that goes on the outside of a kilt. That fox necklace is even sadder, only because I can’t figure out how they get it to stay on the headless wonder.
Always reassuring to know that there is something out there that can make your boobs look furry…
As a woman from Louisiana, I’m siding with #2Billy Beaver. I passed this to all my favorite coon asses. Yall need to pull the fish-headed squirrels out of your asses.
honesthyperboles, I don’t think they know what a coonass is, so they got the red ass.
Gotta sell this one as a set with a raccoon tail-ornamented butt plug!
OMG I love me some ewoks never thought about wearing it on my girlies though. I literally laughed out loud when I saw this. I love you Regretsy
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