Douche Ex Machina
“This is NOT Summer’s Eve!” Like there’s some great disadvantage to buying FDA approved sanitary products made in hygienic conditions. That is so corporate, man. Down with Big Pussy!
I’m sorry, there is no way I’m buying a bag of parsley and cat hair douche from a stranger on the internet. Jesus Christ, I wouldn’t even buy food on Etsy, much less hillbilly bajingo wash.
February 9, 2011 at 5:10 pm
“Hillbilly bajingo wash” just made my entire day.
March 1, 2011 at 9:22 pm
Mine too!
Sounds sort of like a ringtone.
baaajiinnngooooo
Excuse me, I have to get that
February 9, 2011 at 5:11 pm
I don’t know. I kinda want to shove hot soggy potpourri up my hoo hoo.
February 9, 2011 at 5:11 pm
Bajingo is my new favorite word. i must find a way to work this into my everyday conversation.
February 9, 2011 at 5:12 pm
OMG … agreed. I’m pretty particular about what goes in my vajayjay and pretty sure I wont be buying a special blend of herbs and spices from a stranger. Ack! What are they thinking?
February 9, 2011 at 5:12 pm
“tone”?
???
February 9, 2011 at 5:13 pm
Can’t stop laughing……or shuddering….
February 9, 2011 at 5:13 pm
Umm… It says it rejuvenates, I think that means they are really against “BIG PUSSY”
February 9, 2011 at 5:14 pm
Peppermint and spearmint? Fuck no. All I can think about now is the time my ex decided toothpaste would be an interesting way to “spice things up.”
And that is why you always ask what is about to be applied to your twat.
At least there was no cat hair and residual cigarette ashes in it, so it was marginally better than this.
April 5, 2011 at 1:20 am
yeah, my ex thought BEN GAY would be funny…NOT RECOMMENDED!!!!
February 9, 2011 at 5:15 pm
It’s MINT TEA for the PUSSY. (Which, if I wanted that, I could buy mint tea at the store. And I’d know it was food grade.)
February 9, 2011 at 5:16 pm
Does my pussy not have fresh breath?
February 9, 2011 at 5:17 pm
This seems less likely to make the bajingos in question “Sweet,” than it is some kind of zesty cooter marinade.
I also hope they tell their customers that mugwort is contraindicated if you’re knocked up.
February 9, 2011 at 5:17 pm
You have to let it steep for 40 minutes! By then my stank vagina could have the whole house smelling like low tide.
February 9, 2011 at 5:18 pm
If you mixed it with vinegar, it’d be My Sweet ‘n Sour Vagina Douche. Hmm, Hmm!
July 22, 2011 at 9:39 pm
and if you added Rooster Sauce, it’d be Sweet ‘n Sour ‘n HOT!!!
February 9, 2011 at 5:18 pm
I have some friends who like to do “douchebagging,” I don’t know if that’s the same thing. They’re all single moms now though.
February 9, 2011 at 5:20 pm
I’d buy it if they called it “Hillbilly Bajingo wash” just so I could leave it on the bathroom sink, in full view of visitors. Awkward-tastic!
February 9, 2011 at 5:20 pm
Is it just me or does that look like a chicken head in that bag?
Whatever the hell that is, it’s not going anywhere within five feet of me, let alone my “sacred vibes”.
February 9, 2011 at 5:22 pm
The commercial theme could be sung to the tune of “My Sweet Georgia Brown”
February 9, 2011 at 5:24 pm
OMG! I DON’T HAVE A RERODUCTIVE SYSTEM!!! AAUUUGGHH!
/calls gynocologist in a panic!
February 9, 2011 at 5:25 pm
And I’ve been wondering all these years what to do with the stuff in my vacuum canister. Douche by Dyson.
February 9, 2011 at 5:26 pm
I would like to see this seller on the local craft fair circuit next to the grannies selling afghans and wool hats… preferably in the church auxiliary hall.
February 9, 2011 at 5:31 pm
Considering how much pain soaking in a tub of bath salts made with too much peppermint oil invoked, I can only surmise that this product is for a “fetish” demographic. YOWZA!
February 9, 2011 at 5:31 pm
“This is NOT Summer’s Eve!” Because if you want to fuck up the pH of your vag the best way to do it is with lukewarm tea made from leaves taken from a paper bag.
February 9, 2011 at 5:31 pm
Somehow, I think this would be more like ‘fooling around with a guy after hot wings’ than ‘Summer’s Eve…’
February 9, 2011 at 5:32 pm
Who knew I could stick my nightly cup of herbal tea up my hey-nonny-nonny?
February 9, 2011 at 5:33 pm
“4 out of 5 Douchebags recommend this product.”
February 9, 2011 at 5:34 pm
“My Sweet Vagina” sounds like a babydoll name. or like, a little stuffed vagina with a baby bonnet, sucking on a pacifier, and wearing booties.
Now that I think about it, I can probably find that on Etsy…
February 9, 2011 at 5:35 pm
all these different terms for “lady parts” are cracking me up.
March 1, 2011 at 9:25 pm
me too. that’s one reason i read these comments.
February 9, 2011 at 5:35 pm
“Herbalists have recognized that this is a reliable method to balance, tone, and rejuvenate this system.”
I’m so glad herbalists mean anything whatsoever to modern traditional medicine. Douching is a good way to give a big fat “fuck you” to your vagina as recognized by people who have, you know, PhD’s and shit.
February 9, 2011 at 5:41 pm
Peppermint oil. Near my lady business. *shudder*
Of course, after the hair-and-fluffy-vomit creation featured here, I am not surprised that someone makes Pussy Potpourri and sells it on Etsy. Not so sure that anyone’s lady business should smell like an old lady’s house, but hey, some people are into that….I guess.
However, I would not chance it. Not after the experience of wiping my bum with mentholated tissues one morning, when there was no toilet paper at hand. Tingly!
February 9, 2011 at 5:45 pm
@Pearls: no, no. *Herbalist* have recognized. Singular. You could probably get *one* herbalist to recognize that the secrets of herbal douching were brought to us by Aztec caterpillar Jesus from the moon.
February 9, 2011 at 5:45 pm
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February 9, 2011 at 5:46 pm
Between “hillbilly bajingo wash” and the idea of leaving it in the bathroom just for the full awkward potential of making your guests uncomfortable, my day has markedly improved. Thanks guys. <3
February 9, 2011 at 5:48 pm
Oh Ms.Katy, “Pussy Potpourri.” 42 thumbs up. Perhaps even the name of my new etsy store.
February 9, 2011 at 5:52 pm
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February 9, 2011 at 5:55 pm
Gives a whole new meaning to, “So, how do you take your herbal tea?”
February 9, 2011 at 6:01 pm
Wait, has anybody else even noticed the small print that says: Mix two tablespoons of mixture to a cup of BOILED. WATER.
February 9, 2011 at 6:05 pm
spearmint and peppermint oh no. not only would i imagine that this is probably something like cramming your vag with icy hot, but you would think the mint would be really…potent. hey mom can i have a piece of gum? i know you have it because everyone can smell it! what do you say if there is no gum… sorry kids my vag ate it all! hmm
February 9, 2011 at 6:08 pm
Aw hell, #27 beat me to comparing this to the “white chocolate won’t” or whatever it was called.
I’d buy this if I wanted to not only fuck up my vagina’s pH to make it less resistant to bacterial infections, but if I wanted it to be inundated with the asbestos this shit gathered after her cat knocked it behind her couch and it sat there for the last six years.
From what I understand, carcinogens give off some pretty sacred vibes.
February 9, 2011 at 6:10 pm
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February 9, 2011 at 6:11 pm
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February 9, 2011 at 6:12 pm
p.s. unless you are a fucked up hillbilly, your bajingo has a self-cleaning oven
February 9, 2011 at 6:19 pm
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February 9, 2011 at 6:25 pm
Look, we all know that everyone wants their little ol’ Georgia O’Keefe to be as fresh as the morning dew, but I have to question the particular herbs and spices (is this actually based on the Colonel’s secret recipe?!?) that are included.
Spearmint and peppermint?
“Ooh, honey, you smell like gum!”
Mugwort? Not even Macbeth’s witches would go down that road.
“Boil, boil, toil and trouble/Make my vagina smell like roadside rubble”
Roses?
Only if you want to remind your signifcant other not to forget your anniversary.
Comfrey?
That’ll only guarantee you’ll be, um, comfrey (work out the phonetics – it’s funny, i swear)
In conclusion, things that are usually found in your sun tea pitcher should not be found in your vagina.
February 9, 2011 at 6:26 pm
For the past five minutes I’ve been trying to figure out who I could start a jug band with just so that we could call it Hillbilly Bajingo Wash.
February 9, 2011 at 6:28 pm
Just wondering what clever coffee cup slogan would go on the mug that people boil the water for their vagina tea in..
February 9, 2011 at 6:29 pm
@ #42 — definitely read that as “fresh as Mountain Dew,” which I think is more likely than morning dew with this mix.
February 9, 2011 at 6:29 pm
god, i needed a laugh this evening
by the way, when i first read the title of this vag-wash, all i could keep doing was singing it like the song, “My Sharona” in my head…
my, my, my sweeeeetttt vagina (douche)!!
February 9, 2011 at 6:31 pm
@ #44 — I think it’d go along the lines of mugs you get for father’s day, mother’s day, teacher’s day(?) gifts. “World’s #1 Whatsit” or “Best Bajingo Ever.”
Or maybe simply a poetic, “Sorry, this mug is for my Pussy.”
February 9, 2011 at 6:37 pm
There was a farmer, had a dog, and Bajingo was his name, oh.
February 9, 2011 at 6:52 pm
I can think of a far more pleasant ways to tone my vagina.
February 9, 2011 at 6:57 pm
Although I do not have a vagina, I HAVE put peppermint on my doodle noodle before, and it stung like the dickens. I also tried putting spearmint headache relief oil on it, and that hurt even 2 days after washing it off. I imagine it would be alot like sticking a peppermint stick covered in herb seasoning up my anus, which i will try later
February 9, 2011 at 6:59 pm
I still don’t get what the guy from “The Sopranos” has to do with any of this
February 9, 2011 at 7:14 pm
I bought this for my wife when all they made was new car scent and pine.
February 9, 2011 at 7:15 pm
whimsiclesthenics,
you can join my band that I just formed named Hillbilly Bajingo Wash. It’s an indie punk rockabilly neo classical hipster quintet. But it’s not steam punk.
February 9, 2011 at 7:20 pm
#42-Now I’m seriously thinking of suggesting to my son he change the name of his band to Hillbilly Bajingo Wash.
February 9, 2011 at 7:21 pm
I would be a bit wary of home made cooter rooter, just saying :/
February 9, 2011 at 7:33 pm
Favorite. Regretsy. EVAR.
And it’s all about the “hillbilly bajingo wash”
February 9, 2011 at 7:45 pm
“My Sweet Vagina Douche” is what I call my roommate. This idea-stealing bitch is clearly one of our neighbors.
February 9, 2011 at 7:47 pm
They feature other wonderful products in their shop, such as Sacred Womb Tea: “My uterus feel nourished and healthy, I bleed on time and for a shorter time.” They also make the redundantly named Slumber Sleep Tea as well as another douche that “will rid the vaginal of infection and pelvic inflamation.” I’ve never been more thankful for pharmacies and labs.
February 9, 2011 at 7:48 pm
When he shoves it up his urethra, I’ll put it in my vagina. #equality
February 9, 2011 at 7:51 pm
There is never anything so wrong with my vagina that adding something called mugwort to it would be an improvement.
February 9, 2011 at 7:53 pm
@58 Flair_A_Faucet Betty Cracker-Style
Your citations raise a good point. This should be featured on Engrish, too.
February 9, 2011 at 7:55 pm
Let’s all follow her on Twitter.
February 9, 2011 at 7:57 pm
Please tell me hillbilly bajingo wash is gonna make it to a Regretsy shirt….maybe with a hootch-jug that has a long rubber hose attached?
February 9, 2011 at 7:57 pm
Mugwort *and* comfrey? What is this, vitamin C for carcinogen merkin marinade?
February 9, 2011 at 7:59 pm
Oh my god. This is why I read Regretsy. Hillbilly bajingo wash.
February 9, 2011 at 8:08 pm
Hillbilly bajingo wash to keep your sausage purse in tip top condition, hoo-boy!
February 9, 2011 at 8:09 pm
For ‘Babys and Kids’ are horse vitamins http://www.etsy.com/listing/52173197/sacred-vibes-kids-multi-vitamin-healthy with comfrey and sumac berries. Like I’d give a child some pill made by a self styled herbalist who can’t even spell babies properly.
February 9, 2011 at 8:18 pm
I think “tone” means “burn” in this usage.
Zesty Cooter Marinade!!!!
February 9, 2011 at 8:20 pm
Shit, I’ve been doing it all wrong.
I was using this crap as a suppository so my ass is balanced, toned and rejuvinated. Gotta go back to the gym now I guess.
And I’ve been calling my lady-parts a “bajango” all these years. It’s bajingo. Thanks fer setting me straight Regretsy. This has been an overall education for me tonight.
February 9, 2011 at 8:28 pm
Also for future reference, are we going on the assumption that hillbillies “bajazzle” instead of “vagazzle”?
February 9, 2011 at 8:35 pm
#48 – you beat me to it. Sigh
February 9, 2011 at 8:38 pm
On a more serious note, for you Hillbilly gals whose bajingos need a-waqshin’, and you don’t want to smell like a summer’s eve, might I recommend Dr Bronner’s soaps in a dilution of something teaspoons to something else of water (it’s on the label, along with a sermnon, and a recipe for using the soap as a contraceptive and no I’m NOT kidding).
http://www.drbronner.com/
February 9, 2011 at 8:40 pm
I’m flashing back to college, where some people felt that patchouli was a shower replacement. I suppose minty bajingos (bajingoes?) would be an improvement, as long as they remembered not to use the bong water.
February 9, 2011 at 8:48 pm
just think you could be the 1st satisfied customer to leave feed back on this great item!
“my Potpourri pot has got a lot of attention lately”
or
“the pelicans have totally stopped following me”
awaiting thumbs down… much love.
February 9, 2011 at 9:21 pm
“Hey, I found all this shit in the woods!! Wanna put it up your Vag?? No???”.
February 9, 2011 at 10:06 pm
I bet the spearmint and peppermint sting like heck.
February 9, 2011 at 10:07 pm
When has douching been beneficial to the female reproductive system?
Oh yeah, NEVER.
February 9, 2011 at 10:08 pm
Here’s an interesting side effect of mugwort tea:
“Much used in witchcraft, mugwort is said to be useful in inducing lucid dreaming and astral travel/astral projection.”
I don’t know about anyone else with a vagina but I don’t want mine going anywhere without me.
February 9, 2011 at 10:08 pm
http://www.etsy.com/listing/60113093/vaginal-and-pelvic-inflamation-douche?ga_search_query=douche&ga_search_type=user_shop_ttt_id_5373758
LOL @ “Taking the pill, or other birth control as well as antibiotics which upset the body’s natural pH balance”
Because douching totally helps the pH balance of your body.
February 9, 2011 at 10:24 pm
So if these are herbs for your pussy, does that mean cat nip?
February 9, 2011 at 10:25 pm
See this is why I’m pissed that Alchemy is gone. Because what I really want to do is commission a label design for Hilbilly Bajingo Wash that I can slap on a plain canister of soap flakes or bath salts or some other shit that you might want hanging around on your bathroom counter anyway. And of all the creative douchebags I have in my circle of friends, not a damn one of them is an illustrator. Well, except for my father, but that would be kind of an awkward father/daughter conversation.
February 9, 2011 at 10:26 pm
I just want to add this item from their store:
http://www.etsy.com/listing/38523925/bless-you-again-anti-allergy-tea?ref=v1_other_1
I spy with My Little Eye… foam packing pellets?
February 9, 2011 at 10:32 pm
I’m actually now wondering what this person might soak dentures in.
February 9, 2011 at 11:53 pm
did anyone see the tag list? sacred vibes?
February 9, 2011 at 11:58 pm
Seeing shit like this get tons of views because it’s ridiculous makes me want to start selling stupid crap in my Etsy shop.
But it still makes me laugh.
February 10, 2011 at 12:02 am
Fantastic Fanatic, I’m pretty sure I see dead mice in there, too.
February 10, 2011 at 12:05 am
A paper bag that a complete stranger has filled with herbal who-knows-what-crap and I’m expected to put it in my vagina? Yeah. Sign me up for that.
February 10, 2011 at 12:06 am
the real question is: can we use this if we have pubes or do we have to wax or does that make us look like children or is this an attack against women?
February 10, 2011 at 1:44 am
Hillbilly Bajingo Wash: For when what’s ailing your vagina is so bad, splashing a tea made from dead leaves and sticks at it can only make it better.
February 10, 2011 at 1:48 am
I just spent half an hour reading these comments with tears running down my face.. if I wanted a fresh coochie I would just stick a pine car freshner up there
February 10, 2011 at 2:13 am
And thus the addicts of New Age once again come to rescue of us poor souls trusting in doctors…
February 10, 2011 at 2:36 am
“Roses, spearmint, peppermint, mugwort and comfrey.”
Oh. Lovely. I’ve always wanted to flood the garden with mentholated absinthe tea.
o_O
February 10, 2011 at 3:33 am
Because implying “Your vagina is nasty and smells like a rendering plant next to a paper mill” is EXACTLY the way to attract my business. Yep, felt some swellings of self esteem, better buy this and put it next to my Your Parents Only Pretend To Love You Shampoo and Your Pets Will Die Someday Bodywash.
February 10, 2011 at 3:41 am
@Pantsmonkey: convo me.
(oh wait, you can’t.)
Dammit.
February 10, 2011 at 4:47 am
@Pantsmonkey: Try searching Martha Stewart’s clip art download projects. I seem to remember a Hillbilly Bajingo issue of the magazine from her incarceration years.
February 10, 2011 at 5:36 am
Madge says: “Hillbilly Bajingo Wash? You’re soaking in it!”
This must be some super magical stuff, though, because the instructions say to steep it for 40 minutes, and then use it while it’s warm NOT HOT. 40 minutes. Hot left the station half an hour ago with Warm close on his heels.
Unless the fine print says to only prepare this while sitting in direct sunlight in the Mojave Desert, at which point I think an aromatic vagina is the least of your worries.
February 10, 2011 at 6:44 am
@#11 jecca yeah, mugwart AND pepermint are contraindicated if you are knocked up. If you go by what “herbalist” says this is a paper bag of herbal “Plan B” … that you can purchase from a stranger on Etsy.
February 10, 2011 at 8:25 am
Shouldn’t have read this while eating breakfast. My kitty is terrified of this, much the same way as when the ex suggested Vicks for a lube.
February 10, 2011 at 8:36 am
Wow, that looks like a fast ticket to BV. DRs dont reccomend douching anymore and advice against it. Fucking gross!
February 10, 2011 at 8:36 am
Plus I actually read that douching lowers your chances of concieving on the month you douche.
February 10, 2011 at 8:40 am
“You’re late…for tea!!!” ~smashes tea cup on the floor~
#15 I applauded..actually clapped my hands at your comment even though you can’t hear it.
#50 as usual..you do not disappoint
And now I can’t get that damn country song out of my head…Sweet Vidalia (with a little twist)
Arrrrrrgh!
February 10, 2011 at 9:00 am
Additional ‘flavors?:
raspberries ‘n creme, rum raisin
tropical dee-lite (lime juice & coconut flakes)
Snickers, mojito (and I must say, what a waste)
lobster, Ajax, maple blueberry pancake
Mugwort (aside from being a mile neurotoxin !!WHAT?!!1!) usually grows in abandoned lots and by highways. I really hope this seller is not trying to sell plants that have been growing in a demolition lot off the BQE.
February 10, 2011 at 9:08 am
I love Hey Nonny Nonny! lol, and @ 72 that Doctor looks like the doctor off of Human Centipede! I use herbs for lots of things but NEVER to stick up my precious parts. I am very particular about what goes up there and mint makes my eyes water, what’s it going to do down there? shudders, this is the worst idea I have ever heard of. But, Hillybilly Bajingo is now officially the coolest name EVER!!
February 10, 2011 at 9:08 am
I’m not crazy about the name of the product. I’m thinking something more along the lines of: “Gee your Bajingo smells terrific”
February 10, 2011 at 9:31 am
@72 – Dr Bronner’s is awesome, I use it for almost all household cleaning, and have bathed with it in a pinch. I wouldn’t recommend the peppermint for the bajingo though – might be a little too caustic. XD
February 10, 2011 at 9:57 am
My bajingo has a first name it’s c-r-a-z-y!
February 10, 2011 at 10:08 am
“My cat’s breath smells like cat food!”
- Ralph Wiggum
February 10, 2011 at 10:09 am
I think “My Sweet Vagina Douche” is an excellent thing to say when one has just stubbed one’s toe, seen some epic fuckery, or just blasted one’s cooter with swamp goo.
February 10, 2011 at 10:21 am
While I LOVE “hillbilly bajingo wash,” I’ve noticed that the product is actually made in Brooklyn!
“Yo, Vinnie, ‘member when you told me about Marie’s little problem? Well I got your problem solva right here in this lunch bag for ya – douchebag.”
The only slight snag may be if Vinnie doesn’t “hear” the hyphen and first thinks of the hijacking scene from Goodfellas instead.
February 10, 2011 at 10:44 am
So let’s summarize:
vagina, Big Pussy, hoo hoo, bajingo (personal favorite #1), vajayjay, hey-nonny-nonny, lady business, little ol’ Georgia O’Keefe (personal favorite #2), World’s #1 Whatsit, cooter, sausage purse (honorable mention)
douche, hillbilly bajingo wash, zesty cooter marinade, Pussy Potpourri, cooter rooter
Not to be sexist; Extra Special Honorable Mention to Sexcutioner for “doodle noodle”.
Did I miss any?
Also, @Pantsmonkey, I so wish I had some spare time today… but I’ll see what I can do.
February 10, 2011 at 10:52 am
I’ll buy this and the vegan vaj cake, and you’re all invited over for a whimsicle tea party!
February 10, 2011 at 11:42 am
Douching is bad for your vagina.
Paper bags full of leaves are bad for… well, everything.
February 10, 2011 at 11:54 am
It’s a very basic label, but an attractive way to label your Hillbilly Bajingo Wash:
https://docs.google.com/viewer?a=v&pid=explorer&chrome=true&srcid=0B6XAY4jn4fcdMGJkOTExMzAtYzQxMy00YjQwLWIyNjgtOTAxNGE4YWE5OTIw&hl=en&authkey=CIfJqMUG
February 10, 2011 at 12:17 pm
#46:
“Ooooh my little minty one, mah-minty one,
When you gonna give me some thyme, vagina?
Gonna put the kettle on, the kettle on,
And boil up some potpourri for my vagina.
Man, you know I love
bajingo wash,
Such an herby vag
I always wanna douche
with a fresh
Hot cuppa that
my, my, my-yai-ai whoo!
My my my sweeeet vagina.
My my my sweeet vagina.”
February 10, 2011 at 1:18 pm
Considering this is made of peppermint and shit found on the ground, all I can think of is “Minty the Candy Cane that fell on the ground” from the Conan show.
How did this lady think “Wow, I bet my hooha would smell awesome with a dirty candy cane shoved inside it!”
February 10, 2011 at 1:56 pm
comfrey is banned from sale for oral consumption by anybody because it causes liver failure. it’s the second ingredient in her “healthy kids multi-vites.” i wonder if etsy knows that they’re promoting poisoning children. oddly enough, the fda doesn’t address application to the love canal.
(one more for you, easily_distracted)
February 10, 2011 at 2:31 pm
Please tell me hillbilly bajingo wash is gonna make it to a Regretsy shirt….maybe with a hootch-jug that has a long rubber hose attached?
From “hootch jug” to “cooch jug” in one easy step!
Also: why why why do some people think vajayjay should smell “fresh”? And why don’t these same people market a menthol taint ointment for men so their bits can smell like bathroom cleaner, too? They could call it “taintment”!
Another genital word for you, Easily_Distracted: “Pudendulum.” I may or may not have pointed dramatically at my bf’s junk and yelled this while he was doing a naked dance for my amusement. And then I blogged about it. BOO-YA.
February 10, 2011 at 2:40 pm
I don’t think I heard the word Vagina until I reached 10th grade while growing up….my mother, grandmother and great gran called it a Boodalah….not sure why. But I think every family had their code word. Patty Cake, Weiner, Dingaling, Bajingo, wee-wee and woo-woo…all those fun, nostalgic euphemisms for “down there”.
February 10, 2011 at 4:05 pm
Update @Pantsmonkey!! Here you go!
http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=1665727597729&set=o.285066400359&theater
February 10, 2011 at 6:12 pm
last i knew the medical experts no longer recommend doing this to your well privates
February 10, 2011 at 7:48 pm
“sweet vagina” reminded me of My Sweet Lord (or is it called Hare Krishna?) “Myyy sweet vag…my my my vag..”
February 10, 2011 at 8:47 pm
Sweet “Baby Jesus” vaginas. Pepermint AND spearmint? I feel like this stuff was designed by a guy whose girlfriend laughed at him when he got icyhot on his balls and now he’s trying to get even.
February 11, 2011 at 9:59 am
Gee……wonder what else could be used to clean your special area? Mmmm..
Oh yeah.
SOAP AND WATER. Who would’ve thought??
February 11, 2011 at 10:30 am
omg. i’ve been a big fan of regretsy for 6 months or so, but i had to create a profile so i could comment on the hillbilly bajingo wash!
first, minty douche = worse idea than eyedrops with menthol! i bought some of those on accident once. couldn’t figure out why my kids were screaming and crying about the eyedrops, until i, in a fit of frustration at these little woosies, screamed “omg, it’s eyedrops! man up you little turds!” and put the eyedrops in MY eye, then proceded to cry and scream like they were. coustomer service for the eyedrops told me that it couldn’t be the menthol that made my eye burn. :/ uh huh.
second, make your own hillbilly bajingo wash to horrify your guests with: a lunch sack, the cheapest potpourri you can find, and scrawl Hillbilly Bajingo Wash on the bag with whatever hand you don’t write with. make a few letters backwards and leave out at least on L in hillbilly for maximum horrification.
February 11, 2011 at 10:40 am
and @ Princess Buzzkill, for the link to the magic soap: omg, he looks like a mad scientist from a 60′s horror flick!
February 11, 2011 at 6:37 pm
They should totally take suggestions from this comment section for new product names. I might actually buy these: zesty cooter marinade, Sweet ‘n Sour Vagina Douche, herbal tea up my hey-nonny-nonny, Pussy Potpourri, World’s #1 Whatsit, new car scent, home made cooter rooter, merkin marinade, and fresh-coochie. Not, you understand to actually use (Miss Puss is so fresh she don’t need no douche), but just to display.
I really hope they put the actual package contents on the customs form…”ma’am, I’m afraid there’ll be some extra customs charges on your zesty cooter marinade.”
February 13, 2011 at 3:08 pm
@73 weaselbacon
Just convinced a friend who’s going into the pastry business to call one of his Girl-Scout cookie ripoffs “Minty Bajingo”.
February 14, 2011 at 10:14 am
So my roommate and I made up a song about Hillbilly Bajingo wash (“Hillbilly bajingo wash. Buy it and make your junk smell posh…”) and today I got caught singing it at work.
And also, I’m a teacher.
February 16, 2011 at 9:24 pm
@jecca: The phrase “zesty cooter marinade” made me laugh so hard I choked on my own saliva. Bless you.
March 1, 2011 at 9:26 pm
I don’t know about the rest of you ladies, but I just let my Woomba clean my lady business. (as featured on Saturday Night Live)
April 5, 2011 at 1:41 am
MY FAVORITE SNL CLIP EVER!!!
May 15, 2011 at 4:55 pm
Is this some sort of marinade mix?
July 1, 2011 at 12:28 am
If they added some peppercorns, they could call it “Fire Cooch”.