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WTF Alchemy Request – Personal Issues Edition

39 comments on WTF Alchemy Request – Personal Issues Edition

  1. HelenaHandbasket
    December 8, 2010 at 1:37 pm

    Yeah, stamps are nice. I hate signing all my Christmas cards by hand, too.

    Thumb up Thumb down +427

  2. Sanity_Loss
    December 8, 2010 at 1:38 pm

    What? They don’t want this design on a butt plug?

    Thumb up Thumb down +152

  3. knittin-kitten
    December 8, 2010 at 1:39 pm

    I’m not quite sure how anyone would fit all of that on a 4×4 stamp. But it’s on Etsy so I’m sure someone will try.

    Thumb up Thumb down +74

  4. skarah1313
    December 8, 2010 at 1:40 pm

    I think Helenahandbasket said it best. I got nothing for this one. This one is creepy and very WTF.

    Thumb up Thumb down +29

  5. Jess-sicle
    December 8, 2010 at 1:42 pm

    Thank God someone is finally getting the word out there that it’s not only middle-aged, balding white men who cyber stalk. I can only hope the media campaign that is about to ensue is as promising as this stamp makes it sound.

    Thumb up Thumb down +106

  6. DamnitsGlam
    December 8, 2010 at 1:44 pm

    I notice the request is closed. The fat lady must have sung.

    Thumb up Thumb down +182

  7. Patty got abducted by a Steampunk Alien
    December 8, 2010 at 1:48 pm

    Look, buddy, my nude modeling days are OVER! Stop asking!

    Thumb up Thumb down +233

  8. Wilma Fingerdoo
    December 8, 2010 at 1:48 pm

    Last time I checked, “cyber” anything involved a computer, not binoculars. Therefore, she should have tagged this steampunk.
    I sure hope I don’t come down with a case of the Cyberbullies this holiday season.

    Thumb up Thumb down +210

  9. Idiomaticlogic
    December 8, 2010 at 1:49 pm

    I know it’s a tiny thing to be irked by, considering the subject matter, but do they mean “Cyberbullying is a form of stalking?” That would make much more sense.

    Thumb up Thumb down +92

  10. flare
    December 8, 2010 at 1:54 pm

    yo momma’s so fat she heard about cyber stalking and thought they were talking about eating celery while shopping on HSN.com

    Thumb up Thumb down +104

  11. marymert
    December 8, 2010 at 2:03 pm

    Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

    Thumb up Thumb down -188

  12. Dynomoose
    December 8, 2010 at 2:13 pm

    Damn, they closed the request. It would have been…… nice(?) to see the winning item.

    Thumb up Thumb down +22

  13. captaincavegirl
    December 8, 2010 at 2:15 pm

    A naked, obese woman lurking in someone’s bushes with binoculars only counts as “Cyberbullying” if said obese woman is an android.

    Thumb up Thumb down +126

  14. LeeLooDallas
    December 8, 2010 at 2:24 pm

    You guys have this one covered – funny stuff!

    Except for that Ina comment. I happen to like Ina. What did she ever do to you that Martha Stewart hasn’t already done?

    Thumb up Thumb down +87

  15. catherder
    December 8, 2010 at 2:30 pm

    rofl at Patty.

    I don’t know what sounds creepier, the steampunk cyberbully or the requester of the stamp. Match made in hell, anyone?

    Thumb up Thumb down +20

  16. pavlovsdaughter
    December 8, 2010 at 2:34 pm

    Talk about a bizarre way to say “APPROVED!”

    Thumb up Thumb down +16

  17. mtopia
    December 8, 2010 at 2:58 pm

    How would a 400lb woman hide while she was stalking you? Oh, she’s cyber-stalking! Well, now it all makes sense.

    Thumb up Thumb down +35

  18. whaapplewha
    December 8, 2010 at 3:01 pm

    I’m kind of confused- what is this person going to do with the stamp? Are they sending cyber bullies letters? Do they not understand the *cyber* part of cyber bullies?

    Thumb up Thumb down +56

  19. whimsiclesthenics
    December 8, 2010 at 3:01 pm

    Boy, the principal at Mt. Carmel Public Junior High is really getting serious about this year’s anti-bullying campaign.

    Thumb up Thumb down +34

  20. suzyactiondoll
    December 8, 2010 at 3:17 pm

    How did she know I was cyberstalking her naked. Oh, I was holding my binoculars backwards. My bad.

    Thumb up Thumb down +50

  21. WhyLikeThis
    December 8, 2010 at 3:26 pm

    five bucks will get you a potato, a dollar store paring knife, and a handful of raw alphabet noodles
    take it or leave it

    Thumb up Thumb down +105

  22. WhyLikeThis
    December 8, 2010 at 3:49 pm

    the Venus of Willendorf really hasn’t adapted well to modern culture, has she?

    Thumb up Thumb down +65

  23. invaderhorizongreen
    December 8, 2010 at 4:28 pm

    why don’t they just save themselves five bucks using common household items?

    Thumb up Thumb down +6

  24. Buzzkill Crying Glitter Eagle
    December 8, 2010 at 4:48 pm

    #22 whyLikeThis – I had my Venus of Willendorf snark all lined up and ready to go… and then I saw your post.

    I think this is twice this week you’ve beaten me to the same punchline.

    Thumb up Thumb down +21

  25. Buzzkill Crying Glitter Eagle
    December 8, 2010 at 4:50 pm

    The sad thing is I probably HAVE a Venus of Willendorf rubber stamp. But she’s not holding binoculars, since they hadn’t been invented yet.

    However, I do have a row of Sheila-Na-Gigs on another rubber stamp – would that work as binoculars?

    Thumb up Thumb down +19

  26. Buzzkill Crying Glitter Eagle
    December 8, 2010 at 4:50 pm

    Come to think of it, both those rubber stamps probably cost me over 5 bucks each, so forget it!

    Thumb up Thumb down +7

  27. SheSaidPop
    December 8, 2010 at 4:53 pm

    I’m not quite sure how anyone would fit all of that on a 4×4 stamp. But it’s on Etsy so I’m sure someone will try.

    4″x4″ is not nearly as small as it sounds (*snicker*)

    No, seriously, I do a lot of paintings that size and am continually surprised by how much detail can fit in that amount of space.

    If the guy had asked for a fat lady in a muumuu holding a telescope, that might be different, but nude and binoculars would totally work.

    Thumb up Thumb down +30

  28. ShuffleCara
    December 8, 2010 at 5:36 pm

    You know 400lb women don’t necessarily have the gigundo rolls you are seeking, maybe you should ask for th 700-800lb rolls to better accommodate what seems like an awful lot of text for 4×4

    Thumb up Thumb down +10

  29. The Blue Kraken
    December 8, 2010 at 6:54 pm

    The thing that amuses me the most about this is the bad grammar of the requested wording. not to mention the lacking connection between binoculars and cyber-stalking other than an interest in voyeurism.

    Thumb up Thumb down +22

  30. Badger
    December 8, 2010 at 7:21 pm

    Stalking is not the same thing as cyberbullying. Though I suppose, for the requester, the idea of an obese woman sitting naked at her computer writing nasty things about him on Facebook just wasn’t enough.

    Thumb up Thumb down +18

  31. Nico
    December 8, 2010 at 7:35 pm

    I guess they didn’t think they could appropriately say, “I hate fat people” with flowers.

    Thumb up Thumb down +55

  32. Ananke
    December 8, 2010 at 8:27 pm

    Anyone else notice he wants PHOTOs of the fat chick you are using on the stamp before he accepts your bid……. creeper.

    Thumb up Thumb down +16

  33. SlySevSteph
    December 9, 2010 at 2:02 am

    Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

    Thumb up Thumb down -13

  34. RuthX
    December 9, 2010 at 7:16 am

    Ignoring everything else about it…how dumb do you have to be to ask for a stamp with major grammatical errors?!

    Thumb up Thumb down +18

  35. StinkBait
    December 9, 2010 at 7:52 am

    Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

    Thumb up Thumb down -28

  36. Kitty (=^_^=)~
    December 9, 2010 at 1:37 pm

    I ship it.

    Thumb up Thumb down +5

  37. PussDaddy
    December 10, 2010 at 6:11 am

    Wow, someone actually requested a poetsummer/summerpoet rubber stamp.

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  38. melodieharrison88
    December 10, 2010 at 7:00 pm

    Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

    Thumb up Thumb down -26

  39. d3v3l
    November 14, 2011 at 1:22 pm

    Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

    Thumb up Thumb down -5

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